I’m at my wits end. I don’t know why I feel the need to chronicle but I feel like it’s been built up and I’m so frustrated and at my wits end I need to somehow write this all out. Maybe once it’s in text it’ll make more sense to me? Now that I wrote it out im realizing this is the longest rant I’ve ever written and it’s pretty stream of consciousness. I’ll summarize at the bottom for ease because you definitely don’t need to read my scattered frustrated tirade!
We’ve only been together 3 years. It started with multiple times a day, which I know is not sustainable and I did not expect to last after puppydog stage and that was FINE. After about 2 months it dropped to a couple times a month, with a little vibe action on the side or mutual parallel play, also very satisfying and fun and felt like a great settled-in normal. Things were fun, experimental, and we bought lots of fun toys and gear to try out and explore! It was going great and we were creating a life and home together and delving into left field sexually and it was working GREAT! From my perspective and according to all conversations (which felt honest and open the whole time) we were having fun and always excited for new things!
After the first 10 or so months, one day little did I know was the last time. Suddenly he’s “too tired” or “not in the mood”. We were on opposite shifts but every weekend I fucked up MY schedule to be on his. I was up 36 hours straight or slept 4-5 hours over 3 days so we could spend time together. He never stayed up late or got up early… how the fuck is he “too tired”? I was ready to go all the time and it was always a no. After a full day of dirty talk and expectation I’m getting all done up in something kinky and crawling into bed ready to realize a days worth of conversation and innuendo and “ahhhhh well maybe not tonight”. You can only shamefully shed a strappy skintight bodysuit so many times and stuff it back in the drawer embarrassed before you just stop trying.
But then when I try initiating in a baggy T-shirt and briefs I “never dress up” and “sometimes guys need to be courted too!”. So I dial up the dirty talk, I send little peeks from the stall at work, I flirt by text, send sexy memes. I take him out, buy him dinner and random “just cuz I love you!” Gifts. I flirt and grope and hint and it’s always met enthusiastically and positively when it’s just talk, but it goes from “let’s go shower! I’ll suck your dick!” met with grins and nods, to “hey can you move I need to wash my hair… ok all done here’s your towel”.
Multiple MULTIPLE discussions of “well work is really hard right now” or “I’m just tired” “I just haven’t been in the mood” etc. If I directly ask it’s “well I’m not in the mood but please don’t go look for sex elsewhere”
A year and a half. We had sex once last summer out of the blue. Just trying to sleep and I had hands on me and I was so excited. I don’t know what I did and that was awesome!….and next morning back to the same. We went on an extravagant vacation in December. Lots of alone time, beautiful places. We had sex once, out of the blue, so drunk I don’t know if he remembers and I hardly do. And we got home and back to the same. I beg and flirt and ask and I get “well I’m not in the mood but please don’t go look for sex elsewhere”.
Dressing up, making an effort, rejected over and over. Stop dressing up, bring up my frustrations and it’s “try dressing up and flirting more im just not in the mood TODAY”. Always that unspoken hope of maybe tomorrow? Until tomorrow I get “well I’m not in the mood but please don’t go look for sex elsewhere”.
Then in January I suffered a significant spinal injury. For the last 6 months I could hardly walk, constantly in pain. I basically just did physical therapy, slept, and suffered. And it became “I’m so sorry we can’t have sex, but with your injury I would never be able to without hurting you!”. Which was true. I couldn’t think about sex when I needed all my energy and focus to walk across the room, and even then I was in blinding pain.
During my worst pain and nerve impairment in my lower body he was so supportive! We had consistent eager sexual conversation, constant encouragement and support for masturbation because it was all I could handle. I really felt that once I healed we’d be back on track.
Then 3 weeks ago I finally hit a milestone in recovery. Thanks to the most recent treatment I have full feeling below the waist, and full mobility. I can work out, walk, lift, jog!! Everything seems perfect! My body is back! During those 5 months I gained about 10lbs because of the immobility. I’ve always been very fit, almost no jiggle and work a very physically strenuous job so I had no issues with staying trim and small. Im tall so 10lbs on my frame filled out my hips a little, a little more cellulite but no rolls, no belly, no face changes. I cannot honestly believe my body changed so significantly it’s no longer attractive and he still insists he can’t even tell. Tells me I’m still just as attractive and my body is perfect, but I touch him and it’s like I’m a hideous beluga from hell. Chaste kisses and quickly flipping to face the other way.
Verbally he seems so proud of me, so interested and so flirty ALL THE TIME, but we climb into bed and it’s “Goodnight!” Quick flip, lamp off, snoring.
The worst part is my worst day was the time we finally had sex again. Once again, out of nowhere lusty kisses, sex, everything I’ve always liked. All the details with a cherry on top! I don’t know what I did.
Now a couple weeks go by and it’s chaste closed mouth pecks, “goodnight” quick flip away, lamp off, goodnight, “too tired”.
I express how I’m finally back in my body and after so long I finally have my libido back and how amazing, exciting and wonderful this is. Every time the conversation goes “well I’m not in the mood but please don’t go look for sex elsewhere”.
How does someone with the libido I saw for those first 10 months just turn it off for YEARS? I’m struggling and he says he’s fine just whacking it out. That’s all he wants or needs. He’s not straying, we’re pretty tightly scheduled, we have shared GPS, we’re in touch pretty much all day every day. He’s not getting it elsewhere, but for me this level is not sustainable or survivable.
I always thought a DB was the sign of a relationship in decline but outside of sex our relationship is so strong and open and developing into the life I want… Except I need the physical connection like I need to breath and I’m fucking suffocating. I can’t even put myself in a headspace where you’d live like this by choice, so I simply cannot understand how this can seem ok.
TL;DR: 10 months of our 3 years was an active experimental sex life. And then like a flip of a switch one day he’s always too tired, or not on the mood. Verbally always eager, complementary, and excited for sex, but it almost never actually happens. In the last 2 years I can remember having sex 3 times, all out of the blue, no explanation or attempt on my part it just happened. But come morning we’re back to chaste kisses that get broken off if I try to turn them into anything.
I got injured and couldn’t have sex, which in retrospect seems like it was the best thing ever for him because I stopped asking. Once I healed and expressed my return to HL, I feel like I got one night of fun and now it feels like the expectation is we return to no-sex status quo.
Despite every other aspect of our relationship blooming and becoming better over time, the bedroom is dead as doornails and I feel I can’t get past it.

Just saw a very popular streamer selling 10 packs of the newest English set Paldea evolved for 100 dollars no bounty or anything on it. And people buy it!! It makes no sense to me they’re getting scammed so bad you can practically buy a booster box for 100 I don’t get the hype of overpaying insanely for big streamers.

Discord Username: JB Allye#1218
Character Name and House: Stanton Swann
Appearance: Stanton Swann is an older man, regal in bearing and strong-backed despite his mostly-grayed hairs and wizened eyes. He stands a bit shorter than the average knight, five foot and ten with a lean and powerful frame honed by constant exercise and battle. Scars line his body beneath plate, male and cloth, and a blade wound traces a white streak from the left side of his neck nearly to his ear.
Age: 45
Gift: Leadership
Skills: Strategist(e), Tactician, Cautious, Covert
Talents: Running, Horse breaking, Swimming
Starting Titles: Lord of Stonehelm
Starting Location: Storm's End, with Quentyn Baratheon.
Family Tree:

• Stanton Swann (MC) - 162 AC
• Carolei Estermont (spouse) - 169 AC
  • Shirei Swann (AC) - 187 AC

Biography

Stanton Swann was born in the first moon of the year 162 AC to the Lord Ryger Swann and his wife, Lady Lynesse. He was the second born of their children, but the first to survive past his first year, and he bore his elder brother's name. An altogether normal child, at least by most standards, Stanton grew up healthy and mostly happy, though not without challenges. Ryger Swann was a harsh taskmaster and an equally stern father, and though Stanton would not be a man until his sixteenth year, he wasn't a 'boy' by his ninth.
Stanton took to his harsh instruction well, and though he was not the most skilled warrior in the Seven Kingdoms (not even the most skilled in his own keep), he was a very intelligent young man above all else, something that his father both appreciated and cultivated in the boy. In matters of state, he was competent, in matters of court, he excelled, but it was in tactics and warcraft that the boy showed his genius. His father, no slouch in command himself, was overshadowed by the son, and he hardly minded. Instead, he simply drilled the boy further.
By now, though, it was time for the future Lord Stanton to start doing the business of Lords, and part of that was squiring for a worthy knight. That worthy knight was Brus Baratheon, Lord of Storm's End, and while not as harsh as Ryger Swann, Brus didn't take it easy on the boy. In his own words, he knew 'the lad can take it'. Take it he did. Stanton proved a worthy second to the Lord Baratheon, and along the way would cross paths with, and befriend, his son, who he affectionately knew as 'Billy'. Though Billy himself would be afield as a squire, they spent some time together as children that would only become more common as they both stepped into lordship.
After his ascent to knighthood, and with it, his ascent to manhood, Stanton would return home a different figure than he was when he left. He walked with a newfound confidence and ease about him, with the look in his eye of a young man who had supreme faith in his own abilities and poise. Already a strapping young man, this made him something of a heartthrob within court, and he had no shortage of flirtations with various women of the realm in his wilder years. One such conquest, and the one nearest to his heart, was Carolei Estermont, second daughter of the Lord of Greenstone. Arranged to marry a Rosby man, Stanton would charm her into breaking her arrangements and eloping with him to be wed in Stonehelm, and through means that no man or woman in the House of Stonehelm can decipher to this very day, he was somehow able to convince the Estermonts that he'd done them a favor. Alas, the marriage was far less eventful than the courtship. Despite... vigorous attempts, the two could not seem to conceive, and Stanton worried that the troubles that plagued his own parents with their children had been passed down to him, after a fashion.
Sadly, the life of a lord is not all flirtations and dalliances. Soon enough, Theory would become Practice, and Stanton marched to war for the first time at the age of 24... alongside his friend, the Lord William Baratheon. Stanton was no warrior, or at least, not a particularly outstanding one, but as a tactician he was immaculate. Mostly an outrider for the Marcher forces accompanying the host, Stanton would claim few notable scalps of his own, but his men would demolish the flanks of the opposing force in concert with the royal army, and he would quickly acquit himself well as a leader of men, earning praise from his father and his fellow Lords alike. What few were willing to talk about openly, including Stanton, was his other, more... unsavory activities in the war. Stanton was the leader of the forces ordered to flush the would-be-usurper out of hiding in the Dornish villages and countryside, and he took to the task with grim determination, hunting his quarry with a viciousness and ruthlessness that disturbed his men, though they followed their orders without much protest. Many scars still line the Boneway, and Stanton can claim credit for a troubling number of them.
Though his father would linger on for five more years after the Red War, he would abdicate his seat in favor of Stanton due to his advanced age, leaving the 25 year old as the Lord of Stonehelm. By this time, he had finally had a child, born while he was away at war. A hearty baby girl, who his mother named Shirei. Stanton, uncharacteristically, was rather miffed at the situation. Seven years he'd been wed, and after seven years of trying the gods saw fit to spite him with a daughter. He would never share his feelings with his wife and daughter, however, instead doting on her in the same fashion he doted on his wife. Despite his actions in the war, the image presented to the realm was one of a devoted husband, a devout knight, a fair lord, and a loving father.
All that would subtly begin to change.
As he aged, Stanton would continue trying for a male heir, but once again, a long drought would plague his line. In that time period, William would be blessed with a family of his own, something that caused no end of private envy in Stanton, though he dared not speak it aloud, out of love for his dear friend. He would quickly take to the heir to the house of Storm's End, Quentyn, and even at his young age Stanton treated the boy with the same love and respect he held for his father.
That said, Stanton's subtle descent continued. Conflicts with the Marchers of the Reach over their new conquests drove a wedge between former allies, and Stanton was quite vocal of his personal distrust of their former comrades-in-arms, a position he still holds to this day with much more vitriol. Once a gregarious and outgoing man, Stanton would slowly become reclusive and stern, much like his father. A public feud with Richard Morrigan drew censure from William, and similarly verbose and public displays of vitriol towards their Reachman neighbors only served to make it clear that something was very wrong with Stanton Swann.
That wrongness would only elevate further with time. As he grew older, Stanton became paranoid that the Marcher Lords of the Reach were spying on their Stormlander neighbors, a belief that he came to hold so closely that he would pace the floors at night, seeking anyone who acted suspiciously. A long-time family servant, Lyle, would be found to be acting 'suspiciously' one night, and rather than act reasonably,... Stanton would beat the elderly man to death with a fire iron...in front of his daughter. As it turned out, Lyle had been skimming from the Swann coffers to afford better accommodation for his family, but Stanton had no proof of such a thing, or even a suspicion of it, before killing the man.
Stanton's new demeanor was not a temporary fit, and his episodes have continued, though much more commonly in private now, as William was able to convince his longtime friend to ease his temper, if only somewhat, and the one thing that hasn't changed about Stanton in his later years is his love for 'old Billy boy'. Even going into his fortieth year, the man had no sons, only two more daughters to his name, which meant that unless there were some miracle, Shirei would be the executor of his will and estate, if not the Lady of the house, as he himself had only one brother, and that brother is a Maester. Atop all this, his daughter was hardly a 'catch', a plain, mannish woman much like her father in her stoicism but not nearly as intellectually inclined. If anything, he wished more that Quentyn Baratheon, or Damon Morrigen, the nephew of his hated rival Richard, could be his son, but alas, such a thing was impossible.
Now an aging, bitter man, Stanton Swann turns his attention towards his legacy, that of a good man turned a bitter, wizened butcher by war and time. Skirmishes alongside the Carons against the Dornish, border disputes with the Reachman, and the appointment of his dear friend William as Hand of the King loom large over his head along with the state of his house, and Stanton has come to a realization. He cannot die without a male heir. He mustn't. And he would do anything, and he meant anything, to make that happen.
Even things that no sane man should consider.

AC

Character Name and House: Shirei Swann
Age: 21
Appearance: Shirei is a tall and lean girl that looks much like her father when he was a younger man. with a slight figure, sharp features, and deep brown eyes. She has a few scars of her own from afield and minor accidents with the family sword, but otherwise remains an unassuming, if not particularly beautiful woman.
Gift: Champion
Skills: Swords (e), Defender
Talent(s): Swimming, Singing, Woodworking
Starting Title(s): Heir to Stonehelm
Starting Location: King's Landing, with the Hand.
Note: Shirei is the current bearer of Swan's Song.

Biography

Shirei Swann is the first of the three daughters of Stanton and Carolei Swann, and from birth she was always a strong, boyish little thing, though not as much so as she is now. Stanton and his wife doted on her, as any good parents would, and Shirei grew up loved and healthy, surrounded by care and comfort. Among her household servants, an old man named Lyle, who had seen her father reared, was her favorite, and the old man would constantly watch over the little Lady as she played in the yard or caroused around court.
Shirei never knew her father as the world had known him before his turn for bitterness and hatred, only seeing how others reacted to the man. With her, he was mostly gentle, though sometimes his temper got the better of him, or he was harsher with her than was warranted. The man never struck her, never abused her, the most he did was perhaps raise his tone to her a bit too harshly, and he would always apologize upon doing so, assuring her that it was not her fault that he was troubled so. She believed him, of course. She loved her father dearly.
Alas, this perception of her father was colored dramatically by the death of her first and oldest friend. She was hardly ten when Lyle was caught 'acting unusually' by her father and beaten bloody before her, her mother, and her then infant sister Serra. The beating was an uncomfortably long one- Lyle, an old and frail man by now, was dead long before Stanton stopped swinging the iron. The experience traumatized young Shirei, and she's never quite gotten past it. She also hardly believed the tale that Lyle had stolen from the family coffers.
Aside from that, however, her childhood was fairly typical, though not entirely so. Family friendship with the Baratheons meant that Shirei spent some time around Quentyn, and she envied the heir of Storm's End's skill at arms, learning the sword and shield to better accompany him in the yard and join in on his carousing, whenever he stayed in Stonehelm for a short time. The same would be said for Damon Morrigen, nephew of her father's most heated and hated rival at court, who she bore very little ill will towards. In fact, as they were both about the age where one begins to think of such things, Shirei quite fancied him, though as the heirs of their respective houses, such a match was all but impossible.
Stanton did not discourage his daughter's pursuit of arms, especially when she showed quite the knack for it, and grew into a rather tall and lean woman, taller than him in fact. He didn't encourage it, either. If anything, to Shirei's dismay, the man seemed utterly indifferent, passing off onto her the family sword, Swan's Song, and telling her not to do something stupid.
Now a woman grown, unwed at twenty, and positioned that she may one day lead a House Swann that has alienated all but its closest friends, Shirei is uncharacteristically nervous under her mask of stoic acceptance. Fearing for her father's declining mental state and her own place in the wider world, Shirei nonetheless does what she sees as her duty. Currently, she's petioned her father to remain in King's Landing, partly out of loyalty to her 'Uncle Billy', and partly out of a desire to be away from her father for some time.

Global Info Research announces the release of the report “Global Disposable Microtome Blades Market 2023 by Manufacturers, Regions, Type and Application, Forecast to 2029” . The report is a detailed and comprehensive analysis presented by region and country, type and application. As the market is constantly changing, the report explores the competition, supply and demand trends, as well as key factors that contribute to its changing demands across many markets. Company profiles and product examples of selected competitors, along with market share estimates of some of the selected leaders for the year 2023, are provided. In addition, the report provides key insights about market drivers, restraints, opportunities, new product launches or approvals, COVID-19 and Russia-Ukraine War Influence.
​
According to our (Global Info Research) latest study, the global Disposable Microtome Blades market size was valued at USD million in 2022 and is forecast to a readjusted size of USD million by 2029 with a CAGR of % during review period. The influence of COVID-19 and the Russia-Ukraine War were considered while estimating market sizes.
Key Features:
Global Disposable Microtome Blades market size and forecasts, in consumption value), sales quantity, and average selling prices, 2018-2029
Global Disposable Microtome Blades market size and forecasts by region and country, in consumption value, sales quantity, and average selling prices, 2018-2029
Global Disposable Microtome Blades market size and forecasts, by Type and by Application, in consumption value, sales quantity, and average selling prices, 2018-2029
Global Disposable Microtome Blades market shares of main players, shipments in revenue, sales quantity, and ASP, 2018-2023
​
The Primary Objectives in This Report Are:
To determine the size of the total market opportunity of global and key countries
To assess the growth potential for Disposable Microtome Blades
To forecast future growth in each product and end-use market
To assess competitive factors affecting the marketplace
This report profiles key players in the global Disposable Microtome Blades market based on the following parameters - company overview, production, value, price, gross margin, product portfolio, geographical presence, and key developments.
​
Request Free Sample Copy Or buy this report at:
https://www.globalinforesearch.com/reports/1535463/pharmaceutical-isolators-and-containment-systems
The Disposable Microtome Blades market is segmented as below:
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Market segment by Type
Low Profile Blades
High Profile Blades
Others
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Market segment by Application
Research
Clinical
Others
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Major players covered
Leica Biosystems
Epredia
FEATHER
Sakura Finetek
CL Sturkey
AccuTec Blades
Diapath
Trajan
Crescent Blades
General Data
StatLab
Avantik
​
The Main Contents of the Report, includes a total of 15 chapters:
Chapter 1, to describe Disposable Microtome Blades product scope, market overview, market estimation caveats and base year.
Chapter 2, to profile the top manufacturers of Disposable Microtome Blades, with price, sales, revenue and global market share of Disposable Microtome Blades from 2018 to 2023.
Chapter 3, the Disposable Microtome Blades competitive situation, sales quantity, revenue and global market share of top manufacturers are analyzed emphatically by landscape contrast.
Chapter 4, the Disposable Microtome Blades breakdown data are shown at the regional level, to show the sales quantity, consumption value and growth by regions, from 2018 to 2029.
Chapter 5 and 6, to segment the sales by Type and application, with sales market share and growth rate by type, application, from 2018 to 2029.
Chapter 7, 8, 9, 10 and 11, to break the sales data at the country level, with sales quantity, consumption value and market share for key countries in the world, from 2017 to 2022.and Disposable Microtome Blades market forecast, by regions, type and application, with sales and revenue, from 2024 to 2029.
Chapter 12, market dynamics, drivers, restraints, trends, Porters Five Forces analysis, and Influence of COVID-19 and Russia-Ukraine War.
Chapter 13, the key raw materials and key suppliers, and industry chain of Disposable Microtome Blades.
Chapter 14 and 15, to describe Disposable Microtome Blades sales channel, distributors, customers, research findings and conclusion.
​
The analyst presents a detailed picture of the market by the way of study, synthesis, and summation of data from multiple sources by an analysis of key parameters. Our report on the Disposable Microtome Blades market covers the following areas:
1.Disposable Microtome Blades market sizing
2.Disposable Microtome Blades market forecast
3.Disposable Microtome Blades market industry analysis
4.Analyze the needs of the global Disposable Microtome Bladesbusiness market
5.Answer the market level of global Disposable Microtome Blades
6.Statistics the annual growth of the global Disposable Microtome Bladesproduction market
7.The main producers of the global Disposable Microtome Bladesproduction market
8.Describe the growth factor that promotes market demand
​
Global Info Research is a company that digs deep into global industry information to support enterprises with market strategies and in-depth market development analysis reports. We provides market information consulting services in the global region to support enterprise strategic planning and official information reporting, and focuses on customized research, management consulting, IPO consulting, industry chain research, database and top industry services. At the same time, Global Info Research is also a report publisher, a customer and an interest-based suppliers, and is trusted by more than 30,000 companies around the world. We will always carry out all aspects of our business with excellent expertise and experience.
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Contact Us:
GlobaI Info Research
Web: https://www.globalinforesearch.com
CN: 0086-176 6505 2062
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Email: [email protected]
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i7 Super Gaming PC Full Setup Comes with Windows 10 Pro installed, lots of ports and outputs, tempered glass tinted side window, changeable RGB lighting with the press of a button, gets high FPS and plays the latest games! Will play Call Of Duty Modern Warfare, Warzone, Fortnite, Apex Legends, GTA V, CSGO, Valorant, Overwatch and heaps more! Comes with the full package including full hd 60hz monitor, BRAND NEW RGB gaming keyboard and mouse either black or white and all cables! Hardware : NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1660 Super 6GB Edition Graphics Intel i7-3770 up to 3.80ghz CPU Coolermaster CPU cooler Gigabyte Gaming Motherboard High Speed Wifi Adaptor High Speed 512GB SSD Gskill Gaming Ram 16GB Silverstone RGB Fan Controller Silverstone White RGB Cooling Fans X3 Silverstone White RGB Gaming Case
Upgrade to 27 inch monitor for $99 Upgrade to 1tb SSD for $69 Add 1tb storage $49 Add 2tb storage $79

Have - Steam gifts (ROW, unrestricted, if you can't see the game in my inventory, it is still available, so add me for the trade)

Game name	Price	Notes	Stock	Game Status
Borderless Gaming	5 keys			Gift
Call of Duty World at War	25 keys			Gift
Droplitz	offers	removed game	subID 12638	Gift
F1 2011	offers	removed game	subID 11620	Gift
F1 2011	offers	removed game	subID 12677	Gift
F1 2012	offers	removed game		Gift
Hitman Collection (ROW)	12 keys		subID 49903	Gift
Mount & Blade Complete	6 keys		subID 38003	Gift
NASCAR The Game 2013	45 keys	removed game	subID 28448	Gift
Pro Cycling Manager 2012	offers	removed game	subID 15175	Gift
Pro Cycling Manager 2013	offers	removed game	subID 28407	Gift
Pro Cycling Manager 2014	6 keys			Gift
S.T.A.L.K.E.R. Bundle	10 keys			Gift
Shogun 2 Fall of the Samurai Collection	10 keys		subID 17095	Gift
The Amazing Spider-Man	300 keys	removed game		Gift
The Holiday Express	4 keys		subID 35154	Gift
The Lord of the Rings Online Helm’s Deep Base	offers	removed game	subID 32781	Gift
The Lord of the Rings Online Quad Pack	offers	removed game	subID 32775	Gift
The Lord of the Rings Online Steely Dawn Pack	offers	removed game	subID 18483	Gift
The Sims 3 Diesel Stuff	10 keys			Gift
The Sims 3 Generations	10 keys			Gift
Watch_Dogs Complete	25 keys			Gift
Your Doodles Are Bugged!	offers	removed game	subID 8256	Gift

Want:

• Offers with TF2 keys are preferred
• CSGO skins
• Regarding Tether offers, buyer goes first and covers the transaction fees
• Please DO NOT offer game codes, Humble links, Origin, Uplay codes and 3rd party accounts.

Sending Trade Offers
Trade offer link: https://steamcommunity.com/tradeoffenew/?partner=99041861&token=oT95zjCo
Steam inventory: https://steamcommunity.com/id/routemasteinventory#753_1

TW: grooming, pedophelia
I dont really know how to start but i need so write about it somewhere because its something that makes me actually depressed.
When I was a little Girl i was always extremely anxious, I still have a lot of mental health problems because of other traumatic things that happened during my childhood, i came from a household that wasnt stable. My dad was a bad guy who always slept with women in prostitution and also talked openly about it, he abused my mom. He never did something to me in a sexual way, i still wonder what happened in the past. One of the worst things out of everything traumatic that happened in my childhood& life was how i was getting familiar with sexuality. I dont really remember how i was when i was 3 years old and what really happened but as far as i know my sexuality was already "weird" at that time. My mom told me i sometimes touched other people in an intimate way and suddenly started to walk around naked even in kindergarden. I also lately found a diary from third grade where i wrote extreme intimate things. Anyways, the time i remember good was from age 10-12. My dad still lived with us and till my mom found out that he was intimate with young woman and then finally kicked him fully out.. but my troubles with sexuality started to be worse then i ever could have imagine. After he was kicked out I started to skip school a lot and when I was home i tried to wear my moms high heels even tho they didnt fit, i even wore her make up and tried to look like an adult. This went on till i was 11 years old and then got groomed. I had my first phone, i know i was young and this was a huge mistake, especially since my mom didnt really took care of what im doing with it. In my class many people started to get phones. I also searched up weird things, even tho i cant remember that I actually knew what "sex" really means but i always looked it up. I downloaded instagram and went on forum's. I posted pictures of myself, selfies and always had my age in my bio "11 yeas old" lol. Many old men came to follow and text me. I responded to some. Eventually you know what happens, they asked intimate questions "did you ever touch yourself" surprisingly i never did that or atleast not during that time (for sure I didnt know what he really meant). I said "no" and the men said "its normal" gave me an instruction and told me to show them. I did. During this time i showed myself in a even more hypersexual way, dressing more and more weird, touching myself in places you shouldnt do that, sending pictures to everyone that started to get in touch with me, because i thought its normal like a selfie. Since i didnt had much education on sexual topics I did really weird things when it came to touching.. and so on.. i cant even talk about most things because they are pretty f up. I almost did everything the men told me to and what they showed me, since they sended me p0rn. When I was 12 it finally stopped, ( I dont really remember why things stopped , maybe something just changed in my life, my father was kicked out before and when it stopped he left the city completely, maybe i needed him completely gone from me to have peace.) atleast online it stopped, when i was 13- 14 i sometimes met a few guys that were older, instead of being hypersexual I actually became wary doing this time so nothing happened and when someone tried (which sadly happened) I got away. But the effects of the things i showed people and the things i did had a lot of after affects besides being more wary. A few months later i realized even more how wrong everything was, i showered almost everyday, i was crying, i wanted to rip of my breasts when they started to grow more. I cried when i tried to touch myself. I never told anyone besides a few friends what happened, like i said i wonder what happened when i was 3.. since it seemed to even started at this time. When I was 16 it was the last time i switched between hyper sexual and not sexual at all. I repeated my trauma in some kind of way. I stopped again. Now im still young, but i still suffer a lot from the past, I cant remember all, i dont know if ever in my life i actually got sexually assaulted in RL before age 14 or not. I still hate my sexuality and never had a stable relationship or boyfriend, i met a few men but i always ghosted them afterwards, overall pushed them away. I cant kiss people or overall be intimate without crying and feeling ashamed. I dont think that i actually had a sexuality before age 14, i just did what i was told, saw or Encountered, I dont think i actually felt something. I dont know what to do. Sometimes im also fine with not having a relationship, but also i wish I could have a healthy sexuality and meet people, go party, dont be triggered by just the word "sex". Im still hurting, how could these people take advantage of a child in such awful way.

This is a collection of different tickets I've received about people wrongfully complaining about their internet speeds rather than a single story, but they all tend to be pretty amusing. Feel free to add your own!
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*****
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C: My internet is slow!
>Has 60 Mb/s subscription
M: Ma'am, I'm currently measuring 65 Mb/s to your router, so there is nothing wrong with the speed to your equipment.
C: But Netflix is lagging on my smart-TV!
M: Ma'am, please measure your internet speed.
C: I get 65 Mb/s.
M: Well there you go, that's even more than you pay for.
C: But Netflix is still lagging, you have to fix this!
M: Ma'am, we are not in charge of Netflix or your smart-TV, please contact Netflix or a local technician to troubleshoot your own equipment. Your internet service is more than fine.
>Customer angrily hangs up.
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*****
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C: My internet is slow!
>Has 100 Mb/s subscription
M: Okay, what speed are you measuring?
C: 113!
M: Sir, that's more than you pay for, how do you mean it's slow?
C: Well, when I measured it last week, I got 120!
>facepalm
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*****
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C: My internet is slower than before!
>Has 100 Mb/s subscription
M: Okay, what speed are you measuring?
C: 50 (on WIFI).
M: Okay, that's pretty normal on WIFI, can you check with a cable connected computer please?
C: I should not have to do that; my internet was fine until I downgraded the internet speed!
M: Excuse me?
C: Yeah, you wanted to charge me $10 for 250, so I chose to downgrade to 100, and now my internet is slower!
M: Sir, you are aware that the reason your internet is now slower is due to you choosing a slower speed right?
C: Are you calling me stupid!? If I have 100, I should get 100! Something is wrong with your internet service!
M: Sir, please just connect a PC with a cable and measure the speed without WIFI...
C: You know, I will do that, and then I will prove you all that there is something wrong with your service so you have to fix it!
>Customer angrily hangs up. He never called back.
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*****
C: My internet is slow!
>Has 10 Mb/s subscription
M: Well sir, you have the absolutely slowest internet speed subscription available, so that might be why. What speed are you measuring?
C: 10!
M: Well you pay for 10, so there you go.
C: But it does not FEEL like 10.
M: And how fast do you think 10 should feel like?
C: I don't know, but faster than this!
>facepalm; customer was on a DSL line where 10 was the only speed available.
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*****
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C: My internet is slow!
>Has 250 Mb/s subscription
M: Okay, what speed are you measuring?
C: 150 (at a server far away).
M: Okay, now try to measure your speed against this [correct] server, what speed do you get then?C: 243!M: well there you go, there is nothing wrong with your internet.
C: But I want to file a ticket! My internet is still slow on the first server!
M: But... you literally saw for yourself that you get the correct speed against the nearest server...?!
C: Customer still sends in ticket.
>facepalm
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*****
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C: My internet is slow!
>Has 1000 Mb/s subscription
M: Okay, what speed are you measuring?
C: 560! I want 1000!
M: Sir, our speed guarantee for 1000 is between 500-1000, so this is an okay internet speed. If you are unhappy with it, you can downgrade to 500 instead.
C: No, I want 1000! I was promised that!
M: You are already getting as fast internet as we can deliver. Best I can offer is that you downgrade to 500 if you don't want to pay for 1000.
C: But if I downgrade to 500, I will probably only get 300! I demand you keep me at 1000, but only charge me for 500!
>facepalm, ended up hanging up after 20 min of getting nowhere.
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*****
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C: My internet is slow and loses connection!
>Has 250 Mb/s subscription
M: I see nothing wrong with your service here, but you do have a lot of units connected (over 40!) simultaneously. You might want to consider either upgrading your internet speed or disconnect some units to increase the speed.
C: No, that's not the issue, my internet is fine on everything except my work computer using VPN!
M: Sir... if you have 40 units that all work fine, and the issue is only on a single computer that is not even using our IP; why do you think there is an issue with your internet service?
C: Well... my IT department at work could not find anything wrong, so it must be on your end!
>facepalm
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*****
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C: My TV-service is slow and choppy when I have my playstation connected, but also when I don't have my Playstation connected!
>Wonders why customer even mentions Playstation in that case.
M: All right sir, but just in case, please disconnect your playstation so we can ensure it's not the playstation that is causing the issue.
C: All right, I have done that now.
M: And how is your TV working now?
C: It's working fine now.
M: Well there you go, turns out it was the playstation that was causing the issue after all!
C: All right, so I want to file a ticket so you can fix my TV-service then!
M: What, no!? You need to troubleshoot your playstation since that's the thing causing the issue, we are not in charge of that!
>customer still sends in ticket for their TV-service.
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*****
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Then there's of course a whole heap of customers complaining about their WIFI speed when they have placed their router in a closed cupboard - typically in the electrical cabinet for maximum possible WIFI-disruptions - and then refuse to move the router to a better position because it's "ugly" to look at...

Sensible transfers – Left wing-back
Welcome to another edition of my ‘Sensible Transfers’ series, where I analyse what I believe to be realistic transfers (to varying degrees) for Luton Town FC ahead of the 2023/24 Premier League season. In this post we discuss the left wing-back position. Alfie Doughty has proved his quality, but every Premier League table needs competition. This list includes some ‘first-choice’ picks I believe are realistic, and some ‘wildcard’ picks that I think would be nice but are less realistic for one reason or another.
First-choice
Ryan Manning seems like a no-brainer, being statistically the best left-back in the Championship last season and available on a free. The left wing-back scored 5 goals and chipped in with a further 10 assists in a free-scoring Swansea team. Luton are likely to face serious competition for the Irishman, but he seems like the perfect addition to compete with Doughty.
Gijs Smal has had an impressive season at FC Twente, providing 10 assists and a further 2 goals as they narrowly missed out on European qualification in 5th. With his contract expiring in 2024, FC Twente may want to cash in on the 6-foot wing-back and avoid him leaving on a free. Transfermarkt estimates his value at £3.5m.
Maxim De Cuyper is very much a wing-back. Shining on loan at Westerlo from Club Brugge this season, he scored 8 and assisted 6 in the Jupiler Pro League. He would likely be expensive, with Brugge likely looking to integrate him in the first team before selling him for an even larger fee. At 22, he would provide good competition for Doughty without the pressure of needing to play every single week.
Wildcards
Daley Sinkgraven is available on a free transfer at present, leaving Leverkusen at the expiry of his contract in June. Daley appeared nearly 100 times for Ajax, but hasn’t been in Xabi Alonso’s plans this season. As he’s available on a free, he’s worth the risk given the ability he’s shown in years prior, and his capability to play multiple positions.
Carlos Augusto is a Brazilian left-back plying his trade for Serie-A new boys Monza, who finished in a comfortable 10th this season. Augusto was involved in ¼ of all Monza goals this years, contributing 6 goals and 5 assists. His estimated market value of £6.8m is pretty steep given Doughty’s quality, however.
Luan Cândido is definitely the most ‘wild’ pick on this list. He’s a product of the Red Bull academy, currently playing at RB Bragantino after a spell at RB Leipzig. Playing at left wing-back last year, Luan contributed 11 goals and 2 assists in the Brazilian Serie A. That output is astonishing, and Luton could be able to secure him on the cheap direct from Brazil.

We are a 4 person working family all with different working from home policies and we often find ourselves all working from home on the same day.
Do you "share" your space with other family members?
We are lucky to have a two man study, yet my wife refuses to share, my son is in his bedroom leaving my daughter and I sharing the kitchen table with three dogs and a doorbell that seems to never stop ringing and foot traffic from a son and wife as they get yet another cup of tea,biscuits, crisps followed by the obligatory "don't mind me"
It has now got to the point where I "leave for work" and either head to the local hotel which is 10 minutes away or drive the hour to the office.
Do you share or are you holed up in some room/shed/ ??

Hello everybody !
Second week of my asceticism journey is now complete, and things are going pretty smoothly.
First of all there has been a lot of moving in and out so I was fearing that some of my new habits would suffer from it. But not really, I am still consistent with progress on my five little goals I set for myself.
Chocolate : I am not even thinking about it anymore, my craving for sugary things has been replaced with hunger. Instead of yearning for cakes or chocolate at 4pm, I have become used to preparing sandwiches or eating a banana or kiwi (kiwi is the best fruit)
Video games : Still on my one hour a day limitation. My gaming sessions have been a lot more enjoyable because I would ask myself beforehand on what game I would spend my hour on instead of scrolling endlessly through my steam library.
Writing in my journal : Forgot to do it on two days but still consistently writing in it. It has been a great tool of self reflection and I am happy that in a few years I will be able to get back to these thoughts and see them through a new light brighten by life experiences.
Phone and scrolling : Still didn’t have time to buy a dumbphone, but I already got used to just not use my smartphone that often any more. I uninstalled every social media except the messenger apps that I use to communicate with family and friends. I also put my screen in black and white, don’t know if that will help much but I like the style. In terms of usage I generally abandon it in a drawer before going to the toilets or going to eat (in the past it would follow me everywhere so not having it on me 24/7 is a win). I still have the problem with going on websites and scrolling when on my computer so I will consider the option of webpages blocking PlugIns to target this particular issue.
Sleep schedule : Has been a bit shaken up by the whole « moving from one place to another » part, but it’s still not as bad as my previous « go to sleep at 3am and wake up at 12pm » routine.
An issue is that now I have a lot of free time. Exams period has ended (for now) and I’ll be taking real vacations until the end of the week because I cannot bring myself to look again at my lessons. So that leaves me a ton of time, which made me bored. So I tried out new things, one of which meditation. I did not understand until now what the deal was with meditation. I saw it as a « think of nothing for 30 minutes » but stumbling upon a guided meditation session on the TIDE app made me realise that meditation is not just « think nothing ». There never was an obligation to be able to think of nothing, but on the contrary, one can lean into the fact that thoughts are inevitable and just observe them. See them as what they are without judgments.
I cannot emphasize enough how much of a revelation this was to me. I have now done it several times during the past few days and I can safely say that I enjoy it. I’ll make it my sixth new habit: « meditate every day for at least 10 minutes ».
Also trying right now cold showers and going back to doing sports now that I have plenty of time to do so.
I'll report my progress in a week or in a month, depending on how eventfull things get. I feel like an upcoming challenge will be my exams results next week so yeah I might report on this.
Thanks a lot for reading!

This sub has been an incredible source of information and inspiration, so I gave myself an hour to write down and share some insights from the recent three-week road trip I’ve had with my partner.
General remarks:
- Our main goal was to enjoy nature, so we were okay with spending absolutely no time on the golden circle or in Reykjavik. Due to the weather, we ended up doing both anyway; but these would be the parts of the trip I would skip first. Coming from continental Europe, we had almost no jetlag and could safely start directly with our journey. With more jet lag, some more time to adapt is definitely a good idea.
- We rented a 2WD campervan from Star Car Rental and spent all but the final night on campsites. Our experience with Star Car was very good. The price was competitive and included unlimited mileage, additional driver and all necessary utensils (chairs, table, cooking stuff). We got picked up from the airport and were ready to go within 15’. When giving back the car, we got driven to our hotel without any inspection (we did have zero excess insurance).
- Mid-May to beginning of June was a very nice time to travel. The days are long (I’ve seen no darkness), almost all camping places are open, but the crowds at the highlights are small – except for the big boys in the south.
- We started our days quite early and therefore typically arrived during the afternoon at the campsites. The kitchen area, showers and laundry spaces were often free to use. Be prepared to go to campsites that have only 2 stoves and 1 shower. During prime time, expect some waiting times.
- We picked up around 100 € worth of cash – two campsites were cash-only, everything else was absolutely card-first / cash-free.
Useful ressources:
- Vedur and Safetravel: This sub is absolutely right. Learn how to read and anticipate the weather before you get there. We were there during two yellow warnings and these things are really no joke. It helps to have plenty of time to spontaneously adapt the schedule. And we’ve seen it all: blizzard in the West, hail up North, storm in the East and sun in the South.
- Google reviews & park4night: These were pretty accurate for the campsites. 4+ stars are no-brainers, 3+ depend on your needs (kitchen, shower, electricity) and less than 3 should be avoided. Also, remember to rate them yourself during/after your trip to increase the statistical significance ;)
- Google Maps/MyMaps: MyMaps was useful during our planning to fill with random highlights (waterfalls, hotpots, hikes, campsites) and to set up a rough itinerary. Google Maps is accurate on paved roads. On gravel roads, expect some significant delays. Maps calculates with 80 km/h, while you will probably never exceed 50 km/h. In the Westfjords, we guess-timated our times with 2 minutes per kilometer on the gravel roads. The Happy Campers Campsite Map as well as the Hot Pot Iceland Map were nice to have in the back-pocket to check with some time to spare whether something is close by.
- Polarsteps: This was a cute little App, which we used to keep family and friends informed. You can add pictures and some text to your highlights. This way, you don’t send the same picture into various chats and there is a location- and time-dependent context.
Cost: This is the per-person cost breakdown for our 21-day trip (20-day camper rental, 1 hotel stay, total 3’500€).
- Rental (zero excess insurance, additional driver): 1’135 €
- Flight (from continental Europe): 700 €
- Activities (Pools, Spas, Horse-riding, Kayak): 300 €
- Camping (pretty consistent 2’000 +- 500 ISK p.P.): 275 €
- Groceries (Bonus, Kronan, Netto): 255 €
- Coffee, Beers, Food in Restaurants: 260 €
- Petrol (420 € in total for roughly 3’600 km): 210 €
- Souvenirs: 180 €
- Ferries (into Westfjords and to Westman Islands): 95 €
- Hotel: 75 €
Highlights:
- Sundlaug and Spas: When camping in small towns, very often there will be a swimming pool close by. They are not expensive (around 1000 ISK pP) and a great way to relax after a long day. Also, it feels nice to take longer, hot showers without knowing people are waiting in line. We decided to go for some smaller premium spas and were very happy with all of them: Krauma was one of our first stops, the Forest Lagoon was incredible during evening hours and GeoSea was also fantastic. Re: nudity. It takes a bit to get used to, but its very refreshing to see this very open approach to nudity in the pools. No one cares, no one watches – just do your thing. It’s cool to see groups of friends at all age groups be so open about it. Certainly very different compared to continental Europe.
- As we had to skip the Eastfjords a bit due to storm, we had some time left at the end. We spent the last 3 nights on the Westman Islands. It was great to leave the car for a longer while and do everything by foot. There are plenty of things to do and the swimming pool is fantastic.
- Mulagljufur: Use Google Maps to find the exact location, as of now, there is no sign along the road. The canyon is very beautiful and we ended up hiking for almost three hours. Couldn’t get enough of the views.
- Glymur: The infamous log wasn’t placed when we were there, but the short hike to the cave and towards the canyon was absolutely worth it.
- Camping highlights: Melanes campsite at Raudasandur beach (Westfjords): incredible scenery, wild drive to get there; Thingeyri campsite (Westfjords): directly at the fjord, fantastic infrastructure (probably the best kitchen we’ve had) and IMHO a great alternative to the Tungudalur campsite in Isafjordur; 66.12 N campsite (near Husavik): insane ocean view, good infrastructure, one of the best sites along the diamond circle; Glamping&Camping (Westmann Islands): beautiful setting, good infrastructure.
Itinerary (Highlights: *, ** or ***)
Day 1: Arrival at KEF during the afternoon in pouring rain, set up campervan, first grocery stops at Bonus and Kronan, Dinner at Issi’s Fish&Chips*, Camp at Hjalli Kjos
Day 2: Glymur hike** (up to river, no log), Krauma Spa**, scenic drive into Snaefellsnes, Camp at Freezer Hostel
Day 3: Check out Snaefellsnes highlights, get to Stykkisholmur in the afternoon, Ferry Baldur to Brjanslaekur, Hellulaug hotpot*, drive to Melanes campsite*** on Raudasandur beach
Day 4: full day at Raudasandur, great hikes, another night at Melanes campsite.
Day 5: Long drive through westfjords. Highlights included the self-service fish station in Talknafjordur (amazing fisk bollur**), Dynjandi waterfall and Sandfell hike. Camping at Thingeyri*, relax in local swimming pool
Day 6: drive to Isafjordur, check out city (kind of underwhelming, but it was a national holiday; the brewery is nice), do some small hikes in the area. Camp at Tungudalur.
Day 7: very long drive out of westfjords towards Varmahlid. Hot dog stop in Holmavik and arrive at Lambeyri campsite (cash only)
Day 8: woke up with dead battery, but got jump start by campsite owner. Horseriding tour at Lytingsstadir* was very nice, drive to Akureyri, visit Forest Lagoon**. It was Saturday night when we visited, upon leaving we had police checking every driver for alcohol – so better hold off the pool-side bar ;) wanted to camp at Vaglaskogur but campsite wasn’t open. Went up until the CJA campsite in Laugar with a late-night stop at Godafoss (around 10pm, were the only people there)
Day 9: check out Myvatn area: Dimmuborgir hike, Hverir, Leirhnjukur hike**. Then continue to Dettifoss and camp at Asbyrgi. Late night hike to Asbyrgi ‘island’*.
Day 10: Hike in Asbyrgi canyon, continue to Husavik, visit GeoSea**, camp at 66.12N***
Day 11: long drive with very strong winds. We had to go back to Akureyri (optician to fix broken glasses), so went through Myvatn again with a quick stop at Grjotagja. Beautiful drive, weather was too bad for Studlagil canyon, so we continued all the way to Borgarfjordur eystri. Crazy winds during the night and we were happy that our car didn’t get blown away.
Day 12: unfortunately, no hikes in this beautiful area. Waited for storm to pass until lunchtime, visited harbor with puffins**, drive to Egilsstadir (hot dog stop), continue to Seydisfjordur (kind of underwhelming town, the drive is gorgeous though) and, due to weather forecast, continue all the way to Djupivogur campsite.
Day 13: Incredible drive from Djupivogur to Höfn, stops at Hvalnes and Jökulsarlon. Hike at Mulagljufur***, camp at Svenifell.
Day 14: early-morning hike in Skaftafell**, continue to Kirjubaersklausur for campsite. Had to skip Fjardrargljufur due to weather, visited local swimming pool.
Day 15: yellow warning again. Continued to Vik for Skool Beans Coffee*, quick stop at Reynisfjara beach (red alert was on, so we didn’t go further than the sign), continue to Skogarfoss and hike part of Fimmvorduhals*, camp in Selfoss – swimming pool was closed unfortunately.
Day 16: Weather forecast was very bad, so we spent the day in Reykjavik. Walked around town, grabbed some coffees and visiting the local Sundhöll*. Camp at Mosskogar** (cash-only)
Day 17: Golden circle: hike at Thingvellir, look at Geysir, skipped Delfoss. Camp in Selfoss again.
Day 18: quick stop at Seljalandsfoss, ferry to Westman islands. Set up camp at Glamping&Camping** for the next 3 nights. Visited Brothers Brewery*.
Day 19: Kayak tour with Kayak-and-Puffins-company***. Visited local swimming pool* (trampoline slide was very nice) and watched a local handball game.
Day 20: Hike along volcanoes and coast**, visit brewery again, go to puffin bay**
Day 21: Ferry back to mainland. Drive back towards KEF. Drop-off campervan and spent night in Konvin Hotel. Early morning shuttle to airport (we arrived about 2h early for our 7 am flight and had plenty of time).
Of course, I’m very happy to answer any questions you might have!
Hope this is helpful to some of you :)