Over Memorial Day weekend, I caught my (27M) girlfriend (28F) cheating on me. I have a lot on my mind so this is going to be a long one... apologies in advance. I want to talk about the night it all went down, the days since, and life going forward.
Context:
I have been with my (likely soon to be ex) girlfriend for nearly 8 years. We met in college at a party and never looked back. Our relationship was never the most exciting or passionate, but we loved each other.
I will be the first to admit I was not a perfect partner. I struggled with alcohol and we both smoked a fair bit of marijuana through college and our early 20s. I also struggled greatly with depression and anxiety. Despite these issues, I always held down a job and paid the bills. We also rarely fought.
I have made great strides in my life to put these issues behind me. I am completely sober and have worked very hard to become the best future husband and father I can be for our family.
Over the years we built a life together. We both graduated college, moved to the big city, and began our careers. We have 2 dogs (luckily no kids) and live in a nice house in a nice suburb that we split rent on. Our lives are integrated. She is a part of my family and I am a part of hers. We have lived together for years and have shared expenses.
We are not engaged yet but I have had a ring for several months now. I had not proposed because I felt there were cracks in our relationship that I wanted to work on before taking that next step. I had tried to have conversations about these issues but was never met with any meaningful dialogue or action.
"D-day":
I think the story of my D-day actually start a couple weeks before it actually happened. One day before work, I had asked my GF (I'll call her J) if she could please clean her dishes in the sink and clean up her pile of laundry in the bathroom. No demands or anything, just "please, I'd appreciate it". J blew up at me. "Do you know how long you were a mess and I put up with it??". I was hurt but at this point I needed to leave for work so I said we need to talk later and headed out the door. I gathered my thoughts during the day and came home a little early from work. We sat down and I laid out the following points:
1. Please stop using the past against me. I know I wasn't perfect but I've worked very hard to become a better person. I cannot be in a relationship where my partner will hold my darkest days over my head to win an argument.
2. J works the nightshift and I have struggled with this in the past. We don't see each other very often as our schedules are completely opposite. She was open to changing to the day shift in the past but recently has hardened her stance. Recently, she has been sleeping a LOT on her days off. I understand nightshift is brutal on one's sleep schedule but it was getting to the point where she would only be awake 4-6 hours on her days off. These few hours she was awake she would lay on the couch and watch TV. It made having a relationship difficult, and it also meant her share of house duties was falling behind (leaving her dishes in the sink, her clothes all over the place, etc).
3. Sex. Our sex life has never been great. I have been open about my desire to improve things, have worked on myself to be an attractive partner, and have tried to discuss her wants and needs as well. There was never any progress.
During this conversation, I asked for her thoughts and feelings on each topic. I desperately wanted an actual dialogue but she was giving me nothing. Ultimately, she said she needed time to think about what I said. Since the conversation, I had not seen her hardly seen her at all. She had been gone almost a week on a hiking trip with some co-workers that had been planned for a while. Then because of work there was another week of not really seeing each other.
Friday night, J asks if I want to go to a birthday dinner for a family friend on Saturday. I had plans that required me to be up early on Sunday, so I said probably not as I knew she would want to stay and hang out late with them. She swore she would not as she had work on Sunday. I only half believed her, but agreed to go because I knew it'd make her happy.
Towards the end of dinner I go to the restroom and when I come back, what always happens happened. "Would you be ok if I actually went out? I won't be out much later" She asked in front of the entire group so I said "sure, you can do what you want" A few minutes later off to the side, I let her know I was upset that she went back on her word but she was un-phased. She promised she wouldn't be out very late and I believed her as the group was primarily mid-30s people with young kids. One of the other people at the birthday dinner assured me they would give her a ride home.
I drove home alone and the anger built. I typed out a long text about how I was hurt that she didn't come home with me like she said she would, but ultimately deleted it before sending. I didn't want to needlessly make her night worse and told myself we would talk in the morning. I go to bed.
2AM I wake up to go pee. She isn't there. I check my phone and she hasn't texted me at all either. We share locations with each other so I check and it's not loading so I am getting a bit worried for her safety at this point.
I call her and she picks up "Hello?" "Hey J where are you??" "Oh I decided to sleep over at family friend's house" This alone wasn't concerning as the family friends were a married couple with young children. We have known them for years and it was not unusual for her to spend the night there after going out with them.
At this point my concern quickly turns back to anger because not only did she lie to me again about coming home early, she didn't even text me to let me know her plans changed. I told J to get an Uber and come home, we need to talk. She was annoyed and let me know it but I didn't care. She told me she would order an Uber.
Nearly 30 minutes had passed and I had not heard from her. I check her location again to see if she's on her way. Unlike before, it does load this time. Not only was she not on the way back, she was at a house I didn't recognize. I call her back "Hey I thought you said you were ordering an Uber and coming home? Also where are you? Your location is showing you at some house I've never seen".
She sticks to her story. She is at family friend's. She has no idea why her location is showing the other house, because she is definitely at family friend's. I'm uneasy at this point but still haven't jumped to any conclusions. Maybe it was a glitch. Seemed to be pretty far away from where she was claiming to be for a glitch and it also hadn't moved at all in a while... but whatever, anything is possible I suppose.
I am asking her why she keeps lying to me. Lied about not going out in the first place, lied about how long she'd be gone, and lied about calling an Uber 30 minutes ago. She says the Uber is coming in 4 minutes and that she will call me when it picks her up because she doesn't want to argue with me in front of family friends.
I watch her location, expecting it to jump and correct itself once she starts moving. Instead, it moves exactly as if she was picked up in an Uber from that house. Whatever, she is on her way.
I go downstairs and wait for her to arrive. Once she does I ask what she did tonight. "I went to the bar and then to family friends". I ask her what she was doing at family friends. "Just talking. You know I stay there sometimes what's the big deal?". I ask what on earth they were talking until 2:30 in the morning. It just didn't make sense, they're a mid-30s married couple with young kids and full time jobs. Staying awake this late just to talk?
"Well we were talking about you for one" "Me? What about me" "For starters your psychotic behavior tonight."
I was mad sure but my behavior had been far from "psychotic". I never raised my voice and never accused her of anything. I demanded she come home sure but I felt I was justified in that.
From here she continues to say they talked about the discussion from 2 weeks ago. How I "attacked her" and "piled on her for no reason". I was shocked. I thought I had handled that conversation a couple weeks ago very maturely. I was actually proud of myself for taking time to gather my thoughts so that I could calmly lay them out when I got home. At this point however, I was questioning myself.
Did I dog pile her for no reason? Was the way I approached it an "attack"? My only thought was maybe it felt one sided because she refused to engage in any discussion. I asked why she could talk to other people about our relationship but not me.
It would never become clear however as she said she was done talking and was going to bed. I begged her to give me something, anything. I didn't care if her response was in the form of yelling at me. I just needed SOMETHING.
As she's walking up the stairs I ask her to explain why her location was at that house. The story was the same. She didn't know, she was at family friends house. I told her I want to believe her but I know what I saw with my own eyes. It just didn't make sense. I would have believed anything that plausibly put her at that house. "I was at family friends and that's that. If you don't believe me, the we have MUCH bigger problems"
That was that. I did trust her and so I accepted it and went up to join her in bed. There was a little voice in the back of my mind that knew what I saw but she wouldn't lie, she definitely wouldn't cheat.
As I am about to fall asleep, I sit up suddenly and say "J I have an idea" *half asleep* "what?" "Show me your Uber receipts. That will prove you're telling the truth, any small doubts I have will be gone and we can just move on from this. Now she seems to be completely asleep (almost certainly faking it looking back). I grab her phone from under her pillow and unlock it.
On the screen is a text thread to a guy I'll call Jake. There were only 2 messages. First from earlier in the evening "It's J". The kind of message you send when someone puts their number in your phone and you text them so they have your number now. Then one she forgot to send "Hey sorry about that... I made it home ok".
Even at this point, my naïve ass did not jump to cheating. I truly assumed it was probably someone who was also at the dinner and stayed the night at family friends. But then I saw the Uber receipt. It had picked her up from the house her location showed her at.
"J WAKE UP. YOU WERE AT THAT HOUSE. WHAT IS GOING ON? WHAT HAPPENED?"
"It's what it looks like"
I asked how could she do this to me? Why would she do this to me? Nothing. Not a single sentence that could be considered a thoughtful response. Despite my demands to know what happened that night, she, as usual, gave me nothing. "It's over. You threw away an 8 year relationship. We were supposed to be together forever. You were supposed to be the mother of my children." Only after those words "It's over" did she show any remorse.
The very little information I did get out of her was:
-This was the first time
-I caught her before anything actually happened
I'm not sure I believe either. It also doesn't really matter to me. Interestingly, about a month prior she told me she had HPV. She assured me that monogamous people can get it. Based on the research I did, it seemed possible, so I didn't think much of it. Now I wonder...
The next few hours were an unproductive loop of various iterations of "How could you" and "I'm sorry I'll do anything to make it up".
Eventually it was 6am and I still had those plans that brought me home early the night before. A 7am tee time. So I left.
It was actually a blessing but I had already had pretty much a full day of plans with some friends. First was golf, then some time at the shooting range with another friend who was going to show me the ropes. These are close friends and I told them everything. They listened to me ramble all day and spent as much time as I needed.
Once I knew J had left for work, I decided it was time to go back home. I had been up since 2am and I was exhausted. I don't fall asleep until midnight. Awake for about 22 hours on the worst day of my life.
The Aftermath:
Honestly... not much happened after. I hurt. It is a deep, constant ache. It was not overwhelming pain like hearing a family member had died. No... just a constant, deep, ache.
I reached out to some more friends who have all been incredibly supportive. I am truly blessed to have the support system I do.
The people I really want to talk to, but haven't had the courage to call yet are my parents. I can't explain why, but I feel almost embarrassed. I also know that once I tell them, the relationship is 100% over with J. They will never see her the same, and she'll know it. I can't live with that tension my whole life.
While I am 99.9% sure this relationship is over, it's hard to say 100%. She was in my life for 8 years. It means a fundamental change to my life presently, and the entire future I had planned.
Work has been hard. I haven't gotten a lot done this week. I've been distracting myself by talking to my co-workers. Today though... I was the only one in the office. Seems everyone else happened to be working from home.
It was not a good day. I have been in my head replaying the events of the weekend and spiraling. Until this point I was weirdly ok. I think it's the first time I've been alone since it happened so all the feelings are coming out.
Going Forward:
I'm not sure what the future holds. I have a few short term plans:
1. STD test
2. Therapy
3. Talk to my parents and likely make a trip home
I also need to talk to J. While I repeatedly said it was over the night it all went down, I think it still needs to be made official. I have not seen J since that night. After work Sunday and Monday night, she has been home. I don't think she's left the house. However, I've been spending as much time away as possible and the little bit I am home, she is in the guest bedroom. I have not had the strength or desire to talk to her.
What I'm most scared of it my living situation and the dogs. While one dog is clearly mine and one is clearly hers, there's a part of me that worries she may do something crazy. I don't know what she's capable of anymore.
We are locked into this lease until February. I have re-read the lease and it seems were pretty much stuck. She has family in town she could stay with but I've got nowhere to go. While it wouldn't ruin me, it would certainly be financially painful if she stopped paying her half of the rent. Best case scenario seems to be we live as roommates and stay out of each other's way for 8 months... A pretty bleak best case scenario.
Once we do separate, there's going to be the challenge of divvying up the stuff. We own a lot of nice furniture together. That furniture probably wouldn't fit well into the apartments we'll likely have to move back into after this. It's all just so unclear at this point.
Conclusion:
If you've made it this far, thank you for listening. Just writing this was very cathartic. I am open to hearing advice on how I should proceed. Nothing in my life has prepared me for something like this.

This is an actual question I have because I never understood harvesting the little sisters. Yes, you do get more ADAM. But at the cost of actually having a happy life (like in the first game) or in the second game setting even more children free of the tyranny that is rapture (like the second game)? Why would you want to be seen as a horrendous dictator who takes ovedestroys the surface world (with Jack) or turn your daughter Eleanor into a monster (with Subject Delta)? I legitimately do not understand why a little more ADAM is worth harvesting the little sisters. If it’s because you need the extra ADAM to complete the game, no you really don’t? You can beat the game with the ADAM you get from saving the little sisters no problem. Or even no ADAM, depending if you want to go for maximum difficulty. I vaguely remember hearing that someone probably beat the game without any ADAM.
But besides that, they’re called Little Sisters for a reason. They’re kids with, most if not all of them under ten, forcibly mentally conditioned to see the world in a twisted wonderland and are seen as nothing but ADAM banks to all of Rapture. Literally everyone despises them (even the Lutz parents committed suicide because they saw their kid was turned into a Little Sister!) and no one in the games besides Tenenbaum seems to have any pretense or guilt about killing literal children for more of that ADAM stuff. Harvesting or saving the girls are entirely up to Jack and Delta’s choices.
When I played Bioshock 2 for the first time and I decided to harvest 1 little sister for an ending I really wanted, I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw the death animation for the little girl. And when Eleanor harvested me later in the game? I nearly puked because of how disgusted I was. I was thinking “that’s what happens to the little sisters when they’re harvested? Oh my god.” I am never ever harvesting a little sister again, it was just so not okay. And I read some comments on this reddit and YouTube videos that some people don’t hesitate to harvest the little sisters! Why?! They’re children forced to become something horrendous that they never asked for! If you choose to harvest the little sisters you’re turning into a child murderer! Fictional children but still!
Maybe it’s because I’m autistic and I’m more empathetic to things, and I’m just too sensitive or soft to it all, but I would seriously appreciate the input of harvesters to see if I’m missing something. Maybe I am too soft like Tenenbaum.

I joined my current job in January on a contract until next year. However, about two months ago, my manager switched departments, and a colleague from my team, who started a few weeks before me and is also on a contract, assumed the manager role. Unfortunately, she has proven to be a narcissistic and difficult individual. She constantly asserts her superiority, reminding everyone that she's now a manager. She criticizes my every action, even pointing out minor issues like spacing in emails, despite her own messages being riddled with grammar and spelling mistakes. She dislikes my friendly interactions with colleagues from other departments and becomes offended when they seek my assistance instead of hers. If I reply to an email before she does or if someone praises my help with an issue, she becomes moody. Any mistake I make, regardless of its insignificance, is blown out of proportion, while she claims to be flawless and places blame on others, usually me.
Recently, a team member from another office quit due to the mistreatment by our manager. She had been a permanent employee for several years but couldn't endure the constant criticism and nitpicking, leading her to resign. I had gained some knowledge of her role before she left, so I agreed to take over temporarily until a replacement was found. Unfortunately, the replacement backed out just two days before their start date. The operations manager in that office then approached me, asking if I would be willing to continue in the role until next year. I've been in this position for a month now, and I'm thoroughly enjoying it. Being three hours away from my old office means I no longer have to deal with my manager in person. Moreover, I'm excelling in this new role, receiving positive feedback from the team here. Several managers have even expressed that I have a promising career ahead in our industry due to my skills and enthusiasm.
This new role is entirely different from my previous job. It is physically demanding, time-consuming, and requires immediate responses. If I fail to address issues promptly, things can go terribly wrong. It's nearly impossible to plan meetings or juggle various responsibilities. Despite explaining this to my manager multiple times, along with others corroborating my situation, she consistently insists that I continue fulfilling my previous job obligations. Just last week, she threw a tantrum when she wanted me to host a meeting, but I had to handle an extremely time-sensitive issue that could have had severe consequences if left unattended. I offered to show her the demands of my current role, but she refuses to learn, claiming she's too busy with her manager responsibilities.
I made my own system for some tasks, which has been highly effective and even received compliments from the team here. However, she dislikes it and insisted on creating a new system that suits her, even though she has no understanding of the task since she refuses to learn it.
Earlier today, a team member working on our project asked if I would accompany some company directors on an offshore trip for a few hours on Monday. I agreed and made arrangements for coverage in the office to ensure nothing would be neglected. However, when I informed my manager, she once again threw a fit and forbade me from going. She claimed she needed me in our previous office to cover her duties while she's on annual leave. Despite her refusal to learn my job, she expects me to handle my current responsibilities, my previous role, and now her own tasks. I reported her behavior to our line manager two weeks ago, but to my disappointment, they took her side, stating that her actions were not malicious and that she simply wants me to succeed.
I'm at my wit's end and can no longer tolerate her constant berating calls and messages, which undermine my self-esteem and take a toll on my mental health. Dealing with her leaves me utterly drained. I cannot block or mute her, and given her close relationship with our line manager, reporting her again won't yield any results. Other colleagues have noticed her behavior towards me and commented on it, but it seems she is untouchable due to her higher position.
Although I've only been at this job for nearly five months and my contract doesn't expire until next year, I find myself considering potential opportunities elsewhere. However, I'm unsure how to explain my decision to potential employers during interviews or why I'm seeking to leave so soon.
Any advice would be much appreciated, thank you.

My dad abused me (and my mom and sister) a lot growing up. He hit my sister and I, sexually abused my mom, and yelled at all three of us. There was a period of time where he would scream and berate me for hours because I had severe anxiety. He terrorized me, and constantly pushed me into situations that would give me panic attacks. And if I didnt go somewhere, he wouldn't feed me. He'd also deny me medical care, and even now if I had a medical emergency, I don't know if I'd get help in time because of him. Its nearly happened before.
I tried to run away, and kill myself, multiple times specifically because of him. I ended up in the psych ward multiple times too, and after the first time, he'd threaten to send me back and leave me there whenever I had a problem. He told me yelling at me is the best thing he ever did for me. I know this is abuse. But now... things like this don't happen. My sister's almost never home. My mom and I placate him. We do what he says, as if we're his servants.
All he does now is play his videogame, and get mad at us for interupting him; even if it's to take me to one of my many doctors appointments (I'm chronically ill). I don't tell anyone in this house how I feel. I let myself be misgendered and deadnamed because I know he won't budge. I don't fight back in fear of him yelling again, and the times I do fight back I end up hurt by some lengthy lecture or "jokes." No one protects me when he's mean. Sometimes they side with him.
I dont want to live here anymore. I feel so trapped and scared and helpless here. I genuinely don't know if I can survive here much longer. But I don't feel like I have a good enough reason to leave now, since most days, nothing happens. And I don't want to upset my mom and sister or anger my dad by leaving. I don't know what to do. And I have no where to go.

I just started carnivore two days ago. I hope it's not too late though and I hope it can help my stomach emptying issues and the supposed neuropathy in my legs they diagnosed me with. I learned that if I only add like 1 cup of home made spaghetti sauce with my roasted Italian sausages, my sugar does not spike much. I had 2 sausages with 4 small meatballs the other day, but with heaps of sauce and it spiked me to 150 for a while. I went from 105 before the meal last night, to 120 2 hours later, to 116 at bedtime. Not perfect, but pretty darn near steady. Tonight imma make the same meal and add some parmasean cheese on top this time.
I feel like Ray Liotta in Good Fellas, opening the front door up in Arizona and realizing how boring his life is going to be. I'm scared though that I played around for too long. Tomorrow imma have three hamburger paddies with some cheese and 1 pickle. I threw away all my bread and have about 10 nice home made burritos that have to go too. I will still only eat once a day but maybe with some pork rinds as snacks, that will come later on. I don't want to try and imitate foods that I used to eat, I want to keep it really simple and easy for now. Kind of like doing prison time. I may add in my huge salad nights again, but that's what triggered my last bout with food moving slow in my stomach. It's the worst thing you can have with stomach emptying issues, but also so is meat. So, have to see what happens.

Hello everyone,
As the title suggests I would like to know how to get a working permit for Ireland or am I even eligible for one?
I am a non-EU, studied mechanical engineering for my Bachelors and Masters at Technical University of Munich, Germany. I am currently residing in Germany, finished my studies and just started working right now. Hence, I do not have a lot of work experience at the moment.
I would like to move to Ireland in near future. I have applied for jobs in the past and I always used to get immediate rejections because of mostly not having a work permit in Ireland.
My question is: How realistic is it for me to move to Ireland? Is there a checklist/ point system for “work permit in Ireland” which I can complete in order to apply? Any suggestions on how to go about it?
Thanks a lot!
P.s I think moving to other EU countries is less challenging than moving to Ireland. :D

Trying to make this all make sense. 3 years ago during Covid I had 2 dreams which fuck me up mentally to this day. The first dream, I was watching an old work manager play basketball. In real life the next day, I just pulled over to use my phone after work, not near my old job where we used to work, and he was just walking down the street towards me and I said hi and even told him I had a dream about him the night before. A week later I had a dream about a girl I had attended a festival with in a big group. The night after that dream, I ran into her and I hadn’t seen her in over a year since the festival.
This is the part where it gets even trickier. I used to be a hardcore Christian and around this time I had made a prayer to god so he could make me a prophet. I just don’t remember if this prayer was done before or after these two coincidences took place. Now I start to think every coincidence means something. Numerology ones are the worst.
I don’t believe in God anymore but I’m still struggling because believing in the supernatural and having no answers as to how it works and what not is super frustrating.

i failed first year. i have to drop out of all my second semester courses. and i’m relying on a SD assignment to boost my gpa from 47 to hopefully at least 55. it’s my fault, obviously i know that. i just wish ubc so more understanding. i lost my parents , moved here on my own, i have no family supports near me, no family to even give me money for food if i needed it.
i’m grieving and trying my best.
grief and school isn’t easy
i really just wanted my life out here to be different but the depression just got worser.
i honestly wish i could be like everyone i see around me, just really grinding and on there shit , it’s just hard.
don’t know what to do honestly i thought this year would work out but it didn’t

Dunya-wise.
I know we're all servants of Allah and we should do ibadah for His sake. I just can't help but think maybe Allah put me in people's lives so that I can contribute to their lives for the better.
I sacrificed countless nights praying Tahajjud for my friends and seldom for my own self. I do that even if they sometimes fail to do the bare minimum with me because I believe for every little good that they do to me, it's what makes them deserving of being prayed for.
Lately I've been feeling down knowing all that effort isn't being seen by them and can't be appreciated for. In fact some events even make me feel like they underappreciate me, and I'm conflicted as to whether I should stop praying for them; I know I can't.
I just feel bad when I don't pray for the people I really care about. But at the same time not doing Tahajjud can be a good thing since I won't feel like I went above and beyond for them and easily feel underappreciated when they don't "treat me well".
Some others have asked me, "have you tried not giving?" I find it hard given that I was raised in an Islamic school for nearly a decade and adopted a different mentality from them. I'm convinced I've been spending my whole life chasing good deeds by doing good with others, which is not necessarily a bad thing, but maybe I should just divert my focus elsewhere? The only time I prayed for myself and for His sake is Dhuha.

Recently lost my 19yo dog, and although on the past 3 months he was not sleeping right with our second 13yo dog he was near they have always shared beds and been best buddies.
We noticed her separation anxiety start off when they were no longer sleeping together as often due to his complications when left alone at home. This made sense because she’s become quite blind and must be quite stressful at times feeling all alone at home… and well now she really is. I work from home and she barge in to the office looking for me very agitated when there are no calls and gets quiet.
I can only imagine what she does when we leave, she will fight her way over to our beds and we had some accidents in the past so have put barriers and been really nice and reassuring when she does pee on the right emergency spots.
My bedroom and bed are wide open and welcoming to go and dig herself in when alone to feel better… but the heat of summer approaching is making that not very appealing. I can tell she’s looking for him too, his spot is gone and empty, and it’s just as confusing to me… but her companion is missing, his smell is fading away and she’s all alone so her separation anxiety has definitely escalated.
We can’t afford another puppy, nor do I think I am ready to have another one in a good while if ever. I want her to live as stress free as possible, and when we’re home near she is good but I can tell she freaks out when she notices she all alone at home.
Any tips will be very much appreciated

That'll be the last time I ask the driver to take the shortest route. Nearly cost me 2 legs and an arm.

June marks the beginning of registration appointments for first-year students, so it's time for some of you to start thinking about building schedules. To help you do that, I have compiled some resources and observations about the entire registration process both for first-years and future semesters below. I hope they inform and facilitate your academic planning, schedule building, and class enrollment decisions and processes.

Online resources

• Atlas: See descriptions, sections, instructor ratings, grade distributions, grade level distributions, major distributions, and various other metrics for each course. Provides a schedule builder that generates feasible schedules for a given set of courses.
• LSA Course Guide: For classes accessible to LSA students. More sophisticated search functionality than Atlas that integrates LSA distribution categories like HU and NS. Shows prerequisites, instructors, sections, textbooks if applicable, and past syllabi if available.
• Wolverine Access: I'd recommend that you only use this for backpacking and registration. There isn't a great reason to use Wolverine Access over the LSA Course Guide or Atlas to discover and examine courses.
• Crappy Scheduler: A currently little-known course lookup and schedule building website maintained by an EECS professor. It enables you to look up courses by code or title. Most interestingly, it enables you to see past offerings of a given course, which helps you assess the full set of potential instructors for a given course (beyond a particular term) and find the best ones among them. A neat Enrollment History graph for each course shows the growth or decline of a course's capacity over time as well as whether it is offered in both Winter and Fall. Special shoutout to the EECS Enrollment page, which has tracked the enrollment trends of EECS courses for nearly 5 years.
• Coursicle: A nationwide platform for building university schedules that supports U-M. You can filter for courses according to the times of their sections (for example, limiting the search to 2pm to 4pm on Mondays). You can compose schedules by adding sections, much like Atlas. Most importantly, you can use Coursicle's mobile app to set up notifications for when a class's enrollment status (Open, Wait List, Closed) changes.
• CourseKit Predictor and Optimizer: A growing platform that tries to streamline the entire course registration process, starting at Michigan. Right now, its optimizer can automatically evaluate and rank all your possible schedules according to your preferences. Its predictor uses its collected enrollment trends to predict the number of seats open for any course on your registration date.

The Registration Process

Every semester, the registration process for the following enrolled semester takes place in three rough phases: picking courses, building schedules, and enrolling in classes.

Picking Courses

Common factors to consider when picking courses include:

• Core requirements of your school (like distribution requirements for LSA and math/physics/chemistry for CoE)
• Core requirements of your potential degree programs (majors, minors, honors) and how they relate in terms of prerequisites
• Personal interests outside of your degree programs for electives. Bonus points if they count toward intellectual breadth for your degree programs. Looking for fun electives? Since you're on Reddit, I recommend Digital Studies electives.
• Enrollment pressure. During each registration season, current students are assigned registration appointment dates based on their CTP (credit toward program), ignoring AP and IB credit, where those with more CTP register before those with less CTP; as a result, junior-standing students register before freshman-standing students. See Fall 2023's example. Because of this arrangement, many courses get filled up by students with more CTP than you to the extent that when your appointment date arrives, they are already full and have a substantial wait list. In that case, your odds of getting into the course tend to be small. This is also true of first-semester registration, so pay attention to the enrollment status of courses you might want to take in your first semester but are mostly taken by upperclasspeople. Check Atlas to confirm that.
  • Enrollment pressure should inform your course selection decisions. For example, if you want to take a high-enrollment-pressure course like GERMAN 386 early on, you should expect to get waitlisted and develop alternative course combinations in case you never get into that course.
  • Check the academic standing distributions on Atlas and whether each section is full to estimate enrollment pressure. You can also use CourseKit Predictor to predict the number of seats open when you register. This uses previous years' enrollment trends to predict future trends.
  • If you are following your major's course sequence at a typical pace (which is indicated by any sample schedules you see), you shouldn't need to worry too much about your major's classes running out of space. However, if you are significantly ahead of this pace, then it might be difficult to get into the classes you want. I am personally ahead of the typical pace as a CS major, eligible for nearly all ULCS classes at the end of my first year. I could not get into the ULCS classes I wanted for the beginning of my second year, and I mostly could for my third year.
• Schedule fit, especially for small classes. Because of the fixed nature of the Schedule of Classes (the times and days of all the sections), some course combinations yield pretty bad schedules in specific semesters. For example, a class might only have 8am lecture sections in Fall 2023 but, according to history, might have lectures at a later time in Winter 2024. Therefore, the relationship between picking courses and building schedules constitutes a feedback loop. Here, you would come up with multiple potential courses, check the optimal quality of schedules involving combinations of the potential courses with something like CourseKit Optimizer, and pick the combination with the best schedule quality. If you're in a department as small as NERS (Nuclear), you might be able to ask your advisor to change a class's scheduled time. This has happened before.

Note for CS students (and probably many other majors): Some core courses are not consistently taught by the same faculty team every semester. For example, some core course might be taught by professors A through F, where A is the best and B is the second best, etc. Suppose that professors C, D, and F are teaching in Fall 2023. If you don't need to complete the course urgently as a prerequisite for other degree requirements, and if the best professors have taught in recent semesters, then you can wait to enroll in a future semester where professors A or B teach that course. This is especially applicable to EECS 370.

Building schedules

Start with combinations of courses from the previous step. Here are two typical combinations for first-year CS students in CoE:

• ENGR 101, ENGR 100, CHEM 130, ECON 101
• EECS 203, EECS 280, PHYSICS 240, PHIL 183

Use tools to see your schedule options for each combination. Officials will tell you to use Atlas's Schedule Builder, but it's quite limited: It only generates up to 1000 schedules out of millions of potential schedules with your course combinations, it leaves you with hundreds of schedules to evaluate by yourself, and it's pretty slow. Instead, you can try CourseKit's schedule optimizer, which fixes all these problems by searching for all possible schedules and ranking them according to your preferences. This reduces the time you spend building schedules, enables you to evaluate the optimal schedule quality of a course combination, and gives you confidence that your schedule cannot possibly be any better. (Full disclosure: I wrote CourseKit's optimizer, so direct all feedback to me.) Take a few schedules for each course combination as candidates for enrollment.
Now that you roughly know the best possible quality of schedules for each course combination, you can choose whether to return to the previous step to generate more course combinations, evaluate their optimal schedule quality, and so on.

Enrolling in classes

This is where backpacking comes into play, but first, it's important to recognize that the schedule you will actually follow every day is decoupled from the schedule you enroll in on Wolverine Access, depending on your freedom to attend any lecture or discussion or lab in each course. If a schedule you want to follow has some closed or wait listed sections on your registration date, you can replace each of them with another section of the same type and course if and only if that class does not take attendance. Here are a few classes that, to my knowledge, do not take attendance:

• Most lectures with more than 50 people
• EECS 203 discussion
• EECS 281 lab
• ROB 101 lab
• EECS 376 discussion
• EECS 445 discussion

Therefore, if your favorite section of one of these classes is closed, feel free to enroll in a different section and keep going to your favorite section. For others, it's best to check with someone who has taken the course.
Once your schedule for enrollment is ready, you can add it to your Backpack. Think of your Backpack as a staging area for the list of classes you will eventually enroll in. You can edit your Backpack by adding and removing specific classes before your enrollment date, and you gain the ability to enroll in the list of classes in your Backpack on your enrollment date. If you built your schedule on Atlas, you can send the entire schedule to Wolverine Access via the "Send to Backpack" button. If you built your schedule on CourseKit, click the "Enroll" button to get a list of class codes to manually put into your Backpack. On your registration date, you will be able to enroll in the list of classes in your Backpack.

After Registration

Both before and after your enrollment, you may need to monitor the enrollment status of classes you are interested in. For example, you might opt for one of your worse schedules because of a closed section in your best schedule, in which case you'd want to switch to that best schedule as soon as the closed section opens up again. You can use Coursicle's mobile app to sign up for notifications when the enrollment status of those classes changes (between Open, Wait List, and Closed) and act immediately when it changes.
Occasionally, when you can't get into a desired class, you can rely on it to open up after the first day of class. CourseKit Predictor has recorded the drop rates of nearly all undergraduate classes in the beginning of Fall 2022, and they are visible in its predictions. If you decide to rely on a class opening up, I'd recommend that you sign up for status change notifications via Coursicle and remember to attend that class from the first day so that you're not in a rush to catch up near the add/drop deadline. Sometimes, you can talk to the instructor after the first session to try to get into the class.
Note for MATH 115 and MATH 116: The math department controls enrollment in MATH 115 and MATH 116 by introducing artificial scarcity. They open up seats gradually throughout the summer to make enrollment opportunities more equitable between earlier and later registration appointments (see figure below). However, you can circumvent this by using Coursicle's notification service. If you want to get into a particular section, have it notify you as soon as the department opens up more seats for that section so that you can switch to it before the next registration appointments fill them up. Unfortunately, this is a zero-sum game: you snatching the section you want prevents another first-year student from getting into it. You might not find this ethical.
Evidence for artificial scarcity in MATH 115 and MATH 116 capacities
This graph also presents convincing evidence that for many courses, earlier registration dates are more advantageous than later ones. Here, section 1 becomes permanently ineligible for enrollment by the middle of July, so those who enroll after that lose this option.
I understand that this post may be made the registration process you are aware of even more complicated! Questions are welcome here or in my DMs. Good luck with your registration!

Started a game in 867 as the last Jewish Rabbism county located near Crimea under Khazaria but then I got kinda stuck.
I intend to reclaim Jerusalem back to the Jewish but in between me and my target are the Kingdom of Bulgaria, Byzantine Empire and Abbasids.
Gaining more ground in Khazaria is no biggie as I can manipulate it to implode with its confederate partition and then eat all the pieces. But I was intending to grow inside the Byzantines, declare freedom and then go for the Holy City but having a different religion adds a whopping -1000 penalty on any marriage I try to swindle.
So I don't really know. I guess I could amass all the powers of Khazaria and then throw them at Jerusalem but that just seems... boring. Any suggestions?

I’m on day 3 at my new store and I used to work as a barista at a starbucks kiosk in target, so I know how to make all the drinks thank god. But getting to know a whole new team, figure out where everything is and working at a faster pace is throwing me for a loop. The stickers on the cups are so overwhelming, and the fact that everyone stays planted in one spot most of the shift is so strange. At target we just moved around to whatever spot worked best at any given moment. Most of my team speaks Spanish so it’s hard to include myself in conversation when I don’t know what they’re saying. On top of all of it, customers treat us like the scum of the earth, much more than I was used to at target. Does anyone have any tips, on anything. I’m so mentally and physically exhausted and I just want to keep a positive outlook but it’s hard with these huge adjustments.

My close friends tell me I should write a book. There’s no way to include all of the side stories and intricacies of the situation in a single post, like my surgeries or the heinous amounts of food I was doordashed. I just want to get this off my chest and have the reality of what happened written somewhere as I feel I’m fading into insanity.
I’m certainly not innocent here and I don’t feel like a victim. One of the hardest things about being cheated on is the feeling of not being enough and not being desirable. I definitely instigated this girl to chase me a little in order to feel better about myself, but I never could’ve imagined how far she would go.
I (21M) dated my ex (20F) for three years- let’s call her Katie. I go to school in the Midwest and shes in school back home on the east coast (we were both college athletes- she has since quit). We started dating in high school and spent every second of every day together when I was home. Katie was loved dearly by my family, which consisted of nearly a dozen younger siblings that all became very attached. Our parents had no doubt that we would get married. I had experienced a traumatic breakup a few years prior and she made me forget about it completely.
About a month into the school year, I was on a long bus ride home from an away game and got a text from a mutual friend that Katie had cheated. I went through the stages of grief over the next 13 hours, stuck on this bus. I confronted her about it and after denying it over and over, she finally confessed.
We had spent the previous summer traveling the country together, both with her parents and alone. It turns out that she had cheated twice in April with a guy in her friend group right before we had left for our travels. She was horrified by what she did and planned on taking it to the grave. She claimed they were short, drunk mistakes. None of the rest of the friend group knew it happened, except for the one guy that ended up telling me, and obviously the guy she cheated with. Katie cut him off but apparently began entertaining him again once she got back to school, which prompted the mutual friend to tell me after seeing them flirting at the bar, but still not enough for any of her other friends to notice.
Katie along with me, my friends, and my family were devastated. It was months of misery, and still is. I was very dependent on her and had a hard time letting go. She was insistent on making it up to me and proving herself. She would constantly tell me that God told her that I’m her husband. She wouldn’t leave me alone. My parents believed her and advised me to forgive her.
I cut her off several times and each time she found a way around it. She showed up to my house unannounced (10+ hr drive) several times and wrote me, no exaggeration, over 120 letters. One time I was on a road trip and got a call from an unknown number around midnight. She was calling from some restaurant at the halfway point between our schools letting me know she was on her way because I had her number blocked.
It didn’t go well any time she was at my place. I regret to say she would convince me to let her sleep in my bed and things would go from there. I told myself that I was doing the right thing by not turning her away after that long of a drive. I’d promised her father that she would always be safe with me and turning her away in a dangerous Midwest city didn’t feel right. Regardless, I don’t have a good reason for sleeping with her.
I was desperate and had even tried taking another girl out on a date, but cut it off because I just wasn’t over Katie. I didn’t want to hurt someone else in this mess.
Eventually Thanksgiving break came around, and I was concerned about what would happen when Katie was down the street and not across the country.
I was flying home and I’m very cheap, so I always take any layover that will lower the price of my ticket.
This particular layover was totally out of the way in the deep south. My flight from this southern airport to the east coast was delayed. I looked around for a place to chill in the airport when I saw a familiar face from high school. I’ll call her Riley (20F). We had never really crossed paths in high school, but we both knew of each other.
I walked over and sat next to her and we hit it off. It was something out of a movie. It was the first time in months that I felt any kind of relief from Katie. We were on the same flight and just happened to be sitting next to each other on the plane.
The wounds from Katie were still fresh, but how could I not follow up on that? I ended up taking her out on a date a few days later and hung out a few times after. We were both really into each other and I was enjoying the mental peace. She was gorgeous and incredibly entertaining just to talk to.
Unknown to me, (I probably could’ve guessed this) Katie and Riley were friends at one point in high school and word quickly got around to Katie that Riley and I were talking. Part of that made it even sweeter.
Katie wasn’t exactly happy about this and still wouldn’t leave me alone. She would guilt trip me into doing Bible studies with her and would hang out with my sister (19F) when I ignored her.
This was all unknown to Riley. I felt guilty about it and didn’t want to hurt her. But Riley made it clear that she wasn’t looking for anything serious, so I opted not to mention it to her. I felt like it was alright because when I would see Katie it’d be at like a Dennys or something and we would just read the Bible and leave separately.
I didn’t have a car on the east coast, so Riley would have to pick me up when we hung out. One time, she stopped to get coffee right before picking me up and ran into my sister and Katie. Katie ran out of the shop crying and Riley and my sister had a brief interaction (Riley had never officially met my sister). Riley was very aware that me and Katie dated for a long time, but didn’t know why we broke up.
Anyway, she picked me up right after and did an incredible job acting like nothing happened. I heard the story a few days later from Katie and my sister, but never from Riley.
I kept in touch with Riley and we agreed that we would catch up over Christmas break.
My house on the east coast is about an hour and a half from the airport. I have to take a train into the city, and then get a ride from one of my friends in the city to the airport. On the way to the airport, while I was on the train, my ride bailed on me. I was going to miss my flight.
I knew that Katie was at school in the city. I totally see how this is wrong, I could’ve paid for an Uber. I think part of me wanted to see her in some pain, knowing I was with Riley.
END OF PART 1

Near the beginning of Miles’ reintroduction in the movie after he finishes his first fight with the spot, he goes into his room and we briefly see Ganke playing what looks like Marvel’s Spider-Man for maybe a second, but he does a move in game with the spider-arms that wasn’t in the first game, making me think it might be a split second of gameplay from the second one coming out this year! If that’s actually the case, it’s an awesome little Easter egg from Sony and Insomniac.

Hey everyone! I managed to finally do what I planned and alternate fics with each chapter xD. I don't know what it is, but I get hyper focused here and there and then I can get such writer's block with certain things while writing but then get in a zone after managing to get past certain sections. Anyway, this is the second of three planned Linked Souls Day chapters, the next one being the last and from there just hopefully one more chapter that serves as a prelude and transition into the canon events. But don't quote me fully on this as it MIGHT turn into two chapters depending on if I can fit everything in it. But I'm excited to get into the canon material as I've had plans for it since 2020 xD. Anyway, I'm going to likely swap back to my Helluva Boss fic to do a chapter than swap back to this as I want to try to prevent any burn out. Fair warning, I might get a lil hyper focused on the HB fic, but I will do my best to keep a good balance and get back to this as soon as possible.
As I've said before both of these fics are passion projects that I intend to finish no matter how long it takes as I love writing in both worlds. Also, I'm still sticking to this being set pretty much in Japan given everything in canon and sticking to those sensibilities and laws while not neglecting my own western ones and other westerners. I know I've put the disclaimer bout the Nazomi and Sebastian relationship on every prior chapter focusing on then, I just want to make it clear each time this is being handled with care and the maturity it demands. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy and I might get the next chapter out maybe early next month or near the end of this one depending on how things go, but I WILL get it out.
Also, curious what everyone thinks about my introduction of a Valentines equivalent.
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After Shinoku and Vega left to meet up with Anya and Sheila, Sebastian took the time to finish getting ready for when he’d meet up with Nazomi. Just like his friends, Sebastian took his time to make sure that he looked good enough for their rendezvous, putting on some clothes he had that looked very similar to the Cherryton uniform aside from differing colors and other minor things. Also like Shinoku and Vega, he had gotten Nazomi a gift as well. After making sure he was good and ready for his meet up with Nazomi, Sebastian went back to reading to pass the time till he needed to head down the hill to meet up with her. As he waited, Sebastian heard his phone ring, quickly going to see who it was and answering it when he saw it was his mother.
“Hello Sebastian.” His mother said as he answered the phone. “I hope you’re well.”
“Hi mom.” he replied. “Yeah, I’m doing well.”
“That’s good to hear. How are your grades, I trust you’re keeping them high like you always do.” His mother inquired.
“I am.”
“That’s good to hear, you always do your best. Though, I’m not sure why you don’t do cram school like your brother did and your sister is doing. It’s nice that you work hard, don’t get me wrong, but I just want to make sure you’re living up to your full potential.” She said, her tone carrying that always subtle pressure of a proud lioness with high expectations.
And there it was; while she did care for him like any lion mother, she always wanted him to live up to the standards and the image of what a lion should be. Not that she was any different from any other lioness towards her kids, they all knew they had to make sure that the reputation of the king of beasts was maintained. It was an ever present driving force for lions; to stand apart, set the example, excel and push yourself to ever higher points and positions. It was both the greatest driving factor, and the most dangerous threat to a lion. While most would manage to get by and repress the toll it took or even thrive; for others, it would be far too much pressure. It was what lead to so many lions to go to the back alley, to form the likes of the shishigumi or join it.
Sebastian took a moment, the pressure of his mother’s expectations briefly showing before he quickly composed himself. “I understand mom, don’t worry, I have everything planned out.” he assured her. “I’m just tackling things in a way that allows me to give my full attention to my grades here. It’s not that I’m not interested in cram school, I just think it’s more logical to not have my focus split too much.”
“Always the analytical one my little Seby.” his mother commented. “But you only focus on your schoolwork and your reading, even your brother managed to handle doing cram school AND being on his school’s baseball team. He always did so well, even as a cub. Your sister’s also excelling in her gymnastics.” She added. His mother never overtly sounded disappointed, but the subtle nudges and constant reminding of his siblings’ achievements spoke volumes of her wanting him to be like them and every other lion. Why couldn’t she just understand that while he had the potential like every other lion, he just didn’t have the interest? Wasn’t it enough that they were bringing home trophies to show off?
Sebastian let the pressure he felt slip slightly once more before regaining his composure again. “That’s good to hear they’re doing so well…” he said in a cheerful voice. “You don’t need to worry though mom, I’ll make sure I get into a good college, plus all my teachers like me. Getting a recommendation good enough to be accepted won’t be hard to get.”
“True, your teachers always liked you.” His mother said. “But it’s just so rare for a lion not to do cram school. At least, in terms of the ones wanting to make a good life for themselves.” she commented in a veiled implication that a lot of the lions who chose not to were always trouble makers and bad seeds.
“I know mom.” Sebastian replied. “But I do have a career path set and I’m not going to stray from it.”
“And given the way you study and your grades I have no doubt. I can’t wait to hear what prestigious college you become the head over. But you might decide to be something equally important to society.” his mother commented. He never dared once to say he wanted to just teach, he didn’t even care where. All he ever said when what he wanted to be came up was something potentially in education and just smile and nod when his mother would suggest stuff. “By the way, have you found a nice lioness yet?”
“No, not yet mom.” Sebastian replied. He didn’t even dare to think about giving her a hint that he had found someone, knowing full well the questions that ensue about her and wanting to see a picture of or talk to her.
“That’s a shame, I hate to hear that you’re alone on Linked Souls Day. Are you looking?” his mother asked.
“Yes mom, I am.” Sebastian lied. “I’ll find someone, it just takes time for some.”
“But you’re so handsome, are you sure you’re looking or giving good impressions?”
“I am…” Sebastian replied as he held back a sigh.
“Alright. But just know that I have a few friends with very nice daughters, I could always introduce you to.”
Sebastian pinched his brow. “Thanks...but I’m sure I’ll find someone soon.”
“OK, just don’t get so caught up in your studies that you forget.” his mother commented. “Anyway, I need to get going, your father’s going to be taking me out for a romantic date. He says hi by the way.”
“I won’t.” Sebastian said as he composed himself once more. “And that sounds nice, tell him I say hello.”
“Sure. And Sebastian, keep working hard and making us proud.” his mother said before hanging up.
Sebastian let out a sigh as he hung up his phone, putting it back in his pocket. As he did so, Hassan looked at him. “I get the whole familial pressure, it’s not fun. I can only imagine what it’s like with being a lion.”
“She means well…” Sebastian replied.
“Clearly given the expressions you let slip.” Hassan pointed out. “I’m not trying to say your mother’s horrible, but her intentions aren’t exactly selfless.”
“It’s just how it is for us lions.”
“Well if you ask me it’s a bunch of bullshit.” Jax commented.
Hassan just shrugged. “Like Sebastian said, it’s just what it is. All we can do is just not let it get to us and forge our own paths the best we can when it comes to expectations.”
“Anyway, I better start heading out, it’s getting close to time for me to meet up with miss Nazomi.” Sebastian said as he stood up, walking over to get the flowers and gift for Nazomi.
“Sure you don’t need any help?” Hassan asked.
“I’ll be fine.”
Hassan nodded. “Alright.”
“Keep living the dream dude, maybe you’ll get to spend the night with her.” Jax said with a wide grin.
Sebastian just rolled his eyes at Jax before walking out to meet up with Nazomi, not even wanting to respond to the comment. As he headed down to the main floor of the dorm, Sebastian felt a combination of excitement and nervousness. It was his first time celebrating Linked Souls Day with anyone, not that he was ever really bothered about not being able to do so in the past. Sebastian also felt a bit guilty due to the fact that because he was a student and Nazomi a teacher, he couldn’t really do anything publicly with her let alone the fact that she was preparing the meal for them to eat.
Deep down he was a romantic at heart, much maligning the fact that he couldn’t be the one to treat her to a cooked meal. It didn’t really feel right that on Linked Souls Day she was doing most the work. It was just something that he would make sure to do in the future if things got that far with them. Although he still worried about being the potential cause of her losing her job. That, and exactly when and how he was going to introduce her to his parents when he was no longer a student. Hopefully he’d have it figured out when the time came.
Sebastian let out a sigh as he exited the boy’s dorm. Despite all the worries, he still deep down found himself hoping that this would work out. Even with the returning thought of this being just a potential rebellion against his parents and their expectations, he could not deny how he felt about the older feline. Especially with their first date still ever present in his mind. No matter what challenges or obstacles they might face, he was willing to face them, his resolve hardening all the more. Even if it ended up with them having to end things before something bad happened, he’d rather live knowing he tried his best than giving into the fear and not trying to fight for his own happiness.
It didn’t take long for Sebastian to leave the school and get down the hill to where Nazomi said she would be waiting for him, and as he got to their rendezvous spot he stopped. His eyes widened as he felt his heart about to beat out of his chest. Before him stood Nazomi next to her car, dressed in a rather nice satin button down green blouse and black business skirt with a slit on the left side that fit her perfectly. She looked beautiful, so much so that Sebastian felt his cheeks were on fire and his heart was about toleap out of his chest as he blushed, unable to really say anything for a few moments.
“W-wow…” he managed to say as he managed to walk over to Nazomi. “You look...amazing.”
Nazomi smiled a bit. “Thank you, I did try.” she said as she blushed ever so slightly. “I would have worn a dress, but I didn’t want to arouse any real suspicion…”
“It’s fine, there’s not a time I’ve seen you where you didn’t look beautiful.” Sebastian said as he continued to blush, rubbing the back of his head as he did so.
Nazomi blushed more. “You look quite handsome yourself, and just as professional as I do.” she commented. “At least it won’t look too suspicious...I hope.”
“I’m sure it won’t.” Sebastian commented before blinking. “Oh, right, I got you these.” Sebastian added as he handed her the bouquet.
“Awe, thank you love.” Nazomi almost cooed as she took the flowers. “They’re beautiful, I can’t remember the last time I got flowers...Thank you.”
Sebastian smiled as he then handed her a smallish wrapped box. “I also got you this.”
Nazomi blinked as she took the gift, opening it to see it was a bottle of perfume. Taking it out of the box she gave it a sniff. “It smells wonderful, I can’t imagine how much this was…”
“It’s nothing, I saw it one day and thought it’d suit you. So I saved up to make sure I could get you it for today.”
Nazomi smiled, tail flicking as a purr emitted from her throat. “You really are too sweet.” she said as she moved to put the gifts up and then hugged Sebastian. “Again, thanks.” she added as she gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Shall we?”
“Yes.” Sebastian replied, giving Nazomi a nuzzle.
The two got in Nazomi’s car, Sebastian first asking if he should maybe hide out of site like in the trunk only for Nazomi to insist that he sit in the passenger seat. Despite his concerns she said if anyone asked, she was just helping him get to Linked Souls Day meet up. Which, in the most technical sense was not a lie. Sebastian nodded, getting in the passenger seat before Nazomi started her car up and drove.
As They drove through the city to Nazomi’s house something hit Sebastian that he could not believe he didn’t think about even when he had first seen the female cat. “Hey, Mrs. Nazomi?” he asked as he looked at her.
“Yes love?” she asked.
“I just realized...you’re a bit tall for an oriental shorthair. It’s something I should have realized sooner, are you…”
“A mixed species?” Nazomi finished asking for him with a slight smile. “Most don’t really take note until they hit their growth spurts and outgrow me by whatever their heights usually are depending on species. But yes, I am.” she answered. “I’m one third panther on my mother’s side.”
Sebastian blinked, that would explain why she was a bit more ebony in her fur color and why she was taller than the typical shorthair. In fact, her coming up to just under the mid point of his chest hadn’t come off as odd until he thought about it. With some growth still to come, odds are she’d likely be at his gut or just over his waist by the time he finished growing. Not that it was really a problem or he minded, it was just an observation he made.
His eyes glanced over at the scenery as they drove, taking in the buildings and noting that they were sticking to a fairly nice part of town. He then glanced over at Nazomi, taking in how beautiful she looked with a blush, she really was quite something. Sebastian found himself moving his hand closer to hers when they stopped at a red light. Nazomi smiled as she noticed, her hand moving towards his as they held hands for a moment before the light turned green. It did become a thing though with each stop they had to make, both of them enjoying the sign of affection.
It didn’t take too long until they had entered in a rather nice looking neighborhood, about the kind Sebastian assumed Nazomi might live in. It was nice and modest and the house that Nazomi pulled in to was just as nice looking. Thankfully, most of her neighbors were either out celebrating the holiday or doing so in their homes.“Here we are.” Nazomi said warmly.
“It’s a nice looking home.” Sebastian said as the two got out.
“Thanks. It’s really nothing all that special, but it’s nice and cozy and it’s really all I need.” Nazomi replied as she got the gifts Sebastian had gotten before heading to the door with the lion, both their tails flicking and even entwining a bit as they approached it. When they got to the door Nazomi fumbled a bit as she got her keys to unlock it.
“Allow me.” Sebastian offered as he helped her unlock the door, opening it for her.
“Thank you.” Nazomi smiled as she took a quick look around before pecking his cheek. “I’ll put these up while you make yourself at home. I haven’t quite started what I was going to fix, so it will be a bit longer before we eat.”
“You haven’t?” Sebastian inquired. “Then mind if I help? I feel bad that you’re doing a lot of the work and it’s only right that I do everything I can for you today.”
Nazomi smiled as she looked at him. “You’re such a kind, sweet, animal Sebastian. I don’t mind, really.”
“I insist.”
Nazomi chuckled slightly. “You really are a gentleman aren’t you?” she mused.
Sebastian blushed a bit as he rubbed the back of his head. “I just...I want to do whatever I can. You’re a wonderful woman and a great teacher. And, well, I want to take any and every opportunity I can get to treat you right because you deserve it.” the lion said as he blushed some more, conviction clear to see in his eyes.
Nazomi couldn’t help but blush, his words having touched her more than anything in her past relationships. “Alright, how about this? If you want to help me then let’s make it a thing and finish cooking it together?” she offered with a smile.
“I’d like that.” Sebastian agreed with his own smile.
“Alright, just give me a moment.”
Sebastian nodded as Nazomi went to go put up the gifts that Sebastian jad gotten her. As she headed off, Sebastian found his eyes wandering over her form, taking in her figure that was shown off by her attire as well as lower, noting her slightly swaying hips and…tail. Sebastian cursed himself as he moved his eyes to something else. Sure he was still a teenager, a boy, but he prided himself in being better than most. Sure he had his...moments, as Jax so brazenly pointed out. But the last thing he wanted was to be that inappropriate towards Nazomi, even if he did, at times, allow some indulgences here and there.
When Nazomi got back she smiled. “Alright, ready?”
Sebastian nodded. “Yes.”
“OK, should be done in half the time with both of us working on it.”
Nazomi lead Sebastian to the kitchen to show him that she was preparing, a fruit lasagna with the usual accompaniments. After Sebastian looked over the recipe she was using, one from the cooking show Happy Happy Cooking that was toted to be one of their more popular ones among carnivores. he set to work helping her, working side by side as they prepared the fruit, making sure that everything was layered properly. Like in the car, ever now and then Nazomi and Sebastian would briefly hold hands as they prepared the meal, satisfying their feline proclivity for touch contact. It wasn’t too long before they had the lasagna in the oven and the accompanying bread.
“Alright, shouldn’t be too long for it to fully cook, thanks for the help.” Nazomi said as she nuzzled Sebastian, giving him an affectionate hug as well. “In the meantime, we can go over some of my old notes and other things while we wait to help you out with your career path if you like.”
“Sure.” Sebastian smiled as he nuzzled and hugged her back, the two staying like that for a good minute.
“I’ll go get them then.” Nazomi said as she finally and somewhat hesitantly separated to go get her old college notes and study material, returning shortly after with them.
While the food cooked Nazomi went over various things she had to study and learn with Sebastian, covering things they hadn’t gone over from prior times and quizzing him on material they had. To Sebastian, this was like cram school in a sense, getting ready for what he’d need to know to excel in college, only with a more...personal and romantic one on one touch. While he never had issue with paying attention to any of his teachers, Sebastian always hung on every word Nazomi said. To him, her voice was just as beautiful as everything else about her. And just like all the times before, they shared affections with each other.
It seemed like no time at all when the food was done, the two of them chalking it up to them just enjoying each other’s company so much. As Nazomi got the lasagna and bread Sebastian set the table before helping her prepare their plates. As he finished helping her he noticed her take out some wine glasses and a bottle of wine and pouring some of the red liquid in each, although one was more of a sample serving compared to the other, before putting it up and placing them on the table.
“Wine?” Sebastian inquired.
“Just to help things feel a bit more normal.” Nazomi explained. “You don’t have to even drink it. But I was your age once, Rex it only feels like yesterday, and even back then sampling wine wasn’t wrong. That first date we had where you encouraged me to not deny myself any wine, where we acted like a teacher and student just having a meet up to discuss things, stayed on my mind for a while. It wasn’t right that there was some inequality, a full romantic atmosphere. So, I figured sense we’re in private I’d have us on an even level or give the feeling of it. But as I said, you don’t have to drink it.” she said before sitting down.
Sebastian blushed, smiling as he sat down. “Thank you, love.” he said with a fair bit of warmth in hid voice.
It never ceased to surprise the other that both worried about the other’s feelings and the challenges they had to face with their secretive relationship. Something that mad each grow more attached to the other was when a few days after their first date Nazomi had confessed to Sebastian that she was far more hesitant and worried than she let on. Revealing she had been hiding the anxiety of them being a thing and was actually on the verge of suggesting they just call the attempt off out of fear as well as the revelation of his uncle. But she had decided to go through with it because of how truly genuine and good a man he was among other things that made her want to try. Sebastian himself had also confided in her his own concerns and worries about it and her, which made her just feel all the stronger for him over time.
“By the way, how has your day been so far?” Sebastian asked as he began to eat, taking a bite of the lasagna. “Oh, this is delicious.”
“It is.” Nazomi agreed as she took a bite of it. “It’s all thanks to you though, doubt it would have been as good without a little help.” she said with a smile. “As for my day, it’s gone well so far, just the usual grading of papers and preparing for the coming weeks’ lessons. Same old, same old, really. So far the rest of the students I have are nice and do there best. Despite what issues some might cause outside of the classroom I don’t really have to deal with any troublemakers really. Maybe a few slackers or an unmotivated student, but that’s about it.”
“Well you’re a great teacher, I find it hard to believe that any pf my peers would want to cause any trouble in your class. Not only that, but you’re very nice and helpful too.” Sebastian commented.
A smile formed on Nazomi’s mouth as her ebony fur darkened. “Thank you, you’re always so sweet Sebastian.” she said as she purred a bit. “Honestly, I think you’re one of the best students at the school, you work hard and are always so polite. I know you’ll go far with being a teacher.”
Sebastian blushed heavily. “Thank you…” he said with a half smile. “Though I will admit, keeping it up can be a bit— stressful. Comes with being a lion, expectations and familial pressure.” he admitted
Nazomi blinked as she looked at him. “Is it that hard?”
“It’s, well…”
Nazomi moved her hand to rest on top of his. “You can tell me if this is something negatively effecting you Sebastian.”
The lion sighed a bit. “It is hard. Being a lion you’re seen as the king of beasts, someone who’ll go far and have high positioned jobs or in some form of leadership. That image both helps and hurts us, becoming a driving factor of pushing ourselves as much as possible to keep to a standard. It’s something that permeates every lion family, the mothers and fathers pushing their kids to do something worthy of being a lion. Cram school is seen as an expected and normal thing to do and those who don’t do it are mostly looked down on as they are often those that end up in gangs or didn’t try hard enough.”
Nazomi’s hand gripped his, squeezing gently. “Is your family pressuring you?”
“Not...entirely. My mother often brings up what my older brother and my sister are doing and keeps suggesting I try to do the same. She doesn’t seem disappointed, but there’s just something about her voice…” Sebastian admitted. “She is happy that I’m doing well, but I know she expects more. She thinks I’m planning to go into an education position that’s high up, or at a prestigious university when I don’t care where I teach so long as I do some good.”
Nazomi squeezed his hand again, feeling bad for the lion. “That’s not all that good Sebastian, have you thought about bringing it up to a councilor?”
Sebastian shrugged. “Somewhat. But as I said, this permeates lions as a whole, it’s far too ingrained to really be dealt with. Thankfully my situation isn’t too bad, it cab be far worse. Plus, I like learning so it’s not that big of a deal. I also have my friends and, well, you.” he smiled.
Nazomi blushed heavily. “I see…”
“I hope I didn’t make things awkward or anything…”
“No, no! You’re fine Sebastian.” Nazomi assured. “It’s good you have a support system and you don’t really let it get to you, you’re very strong for that. Will you tell your mother you’ll try to teach anywhere?”
“Eventually, yes, when I’m nearing the end of my higher education and am about to apply to various places.” Sebastian answered. “Just like how I’ll tell her about us when I’m a bit into my freshman year at college or before I get into college if we get that far, which I hope we do and keep doing. You are an amazing woman and to be honest, to me you are far more exceptional than any other.”
Nazomi blinked, her fur becoming more dark red than ebony black as her heart melted. He was the kindest, most genuine soul she had ever met and continued to prove he was mature beyond his years. “I— thank you Sebastian.” she said with a soft purr, falling a fair bit more for the lion.
From there the two continued to talk as they ate, taking their time and enjoying each other’s company as they swapped stories about their childhood. Nazomi found herself surprised as she learned that even as a young kid Sebastian was well mannered and somewhat bookish. She felt comfortable around him, able to share with him more embarrassing things like the time she was so nervous to do a presentation in high school that she messed up a word or two or when she practically face planted when she was looking at a crush. It just felt right and natural to be so open with him.
When they had finished eating, Sebastian even having drank the small bit of wine, he and Nazomi cleared the table. Sebastian even helped her with the dishes before they went back to going over some more of Nazomi’s old papers and work to help prepare him. It seemed like no time once more as they noticed the sun was start to set.
“Is it really that late already?” Nazomi asked as she looked at her clock, taking note of the time.
“Looks like it.” Sebastian commented.
“My how time flies, it seems to go so slow until well…” she blushed. “I’m around you.”
Sebastian blushed heavily. “Yeah…”
“Thank you for the lovely time, as well as the gifts and helping out, not many guys are as considerate as you.” Nazomi commented.
“Well, you’re worth any effort…” the lion blushed.
Nazomi smiled, blushing as well. How could this lion keep finding ways to make her heart feel like it was a puddle? She hadn’t really met many guys with the ability to do that over the years, more so not in recent years. It had gotten to the point where she just really stopped looking. But then Sebastian came around and made her feel things she hadn’t felt in a long time. His gentlemanly studious nature and willingness to be so considerate, among other things, just had her more enamored with each time they were together. The fact that he was willing to take things so slow, deny himself the most basic of typical teenage experiences that most his age were having just made him seem too good to be true. And yet, there he was proving to be just that good.
Then there was the fact that while she did do a fare share for the holiday he had not only helped out, but went out of his way to get her flowers and a rather nice gift, not expecting anything special in return and just wanting to treat her right. As the lion got up from where they had been sitting she stood. “Sebastian, before I take you back to Cherryton...I think you deserve another kiss.”
Sebastian blinked as he blushed. “I don’t want you to feel obligated to…”
“No, I want to.” Nazomi admitted with a smile. “The only true thing that’s tricky with our relationship is that you’re a student and I’m a teacher. You’ve proven time and again just how good a man you are and that you are someone I...have looked for.” she blushed. “So I don’t see us kissing, at least in private and while off school grounds as being an issue. I know you’d never take advantage of me and I want to reward you for such, and for treating me to one of the best times I’ve had in a while.”
Sebastian’s tail started to flick happily as he smiled. “Alright.”
The two approached each other, embracing as they leaned in to share a kiss. Just like with their first, it was utterly electrifying for Sebastian. The feel of Nazomi’s lips unlike anything he felt before as his heart beat out of his chest as he started to purr. Sebastian enjoyed every second that the kiss lasted, his hands starting to subconsciously roam along her back a bit, though he would catch and restrain himself before they went too low.
Nazomi for her part pressed a bit firmer than last time, what with it being a holiday for love. As they kissed she noticed that Sebastian’s hands roaming along her back, taking in her form and the feel of her body and causing her to purr a fair bit. She smiled as she noticed he restrained himself from doing anything inappropriate, knowing her trust in him would never be misplaced. Although she promised to herself one day when he was no longer a student, she’d allow him to no longer restrain himself.
As she finally broke the kiss Nazomi smiled. “That was a wonderful kiss, possibly better than the first.” she giggled.
“Y-yeah…” Sebastian agreed, his cheeks a dark red.
“Thank you for being such a gentleman and not taking advantage.” Nazomi commented as they stayed embraced.
“I’d never.”
“I know love.” she smiled. “And that is why I will make you this promise. If we manage to make it to when you are out of school, then you have permission to not restrain yourself anymore as we’ll be in the clear. Not that you’d need my permission at that point” Nazomi giggled. “Anyway, we best get going before it gets too dark.”
Sebastian’s blush deepened all the more. “Yeah…”
The two headed back out to Nazomi’s car, first checking for anyone that might notice before getting in and driving off. The ride back went much like the first, the two briefly holding hands here and there as they made their way through the city. It was something that both Sebastian and Nazomi seemed almost unable to resist doing. Hell, when they had walked back to Nazomi’s car their tails entwined again.
When they got back to the bottom of the hill that Cherryton rested on the moon had not been fully risen for too long. “Thanks again for the lovely Linked Souls Day, I haven’t really celebrated it in so long.” Nazomi said as she parked the car.
“No problem, hopefully our next date can be somewhat soon.” Sebastian replied with a smile. “I hope the rest of your weekend goes well.”
“Thank you Sebastian, you too, I’ll see you Monday.” Nazomi smiled.
Sebastian was about to get out when he stopped. “Nazomi?”
“Yes?”
“Mind if we...have one more kiss?” Sebastian asked as he blushed.
Nazomi smiled as a giggle escaped her lips. “I suppose not, it’s only right to have a goodnight kiss after a date.”
The two leaned in close, sharing in one more kiss as they rested a paw on the back of each other’s head, purring loudly as they did so. When the kiss broke a few moments later Sebastian smiled. “Good night.”
“Good night love.”
Sebastian got out of the car, walking back up the hill as Nazomi turned her car around and left. The lion smiled as his heart continued to race, he was as happy as he had ever felt and was all the happier that Nazomi felt the same way as he did. While it was true their relationship had a strong possibility of stopping if they were ever in great enough danger of being found out, it seemed that she was daring for it to work as much as he was. Whether it did or not, only the future knew.

(30F) I never thought I would be this person. A person that is scared to leave the house, be alone, go out to restaurants or even hang out with friends. In March of 2023 I noticed a significant change in myself. I would wake up a few times a week in a panic attack. Racing heart rate, palpitations, sweaty and out of breath. It was awful. This went on weekly for about a month, then progressed to almost every single day and night. I was exhausted, crying every day and unable to eat. I met with a Nurse Practitioner who talked me out of a panic attack and told me "You do not have to live like this. There are options to help you." She then said the scary word "anti-depressant". I immediately thought "no way". I'm going to fix this myself and get better on my own. This may work for some people, but the daily debilitating anxiety sent me into a depression. I met with a therapist a few weeks later who also agreed. She said the words "Depression is scary." And that really hit me. My mental illness was affecting everyone around me. I knew it was time for me to do something about it no matter how scary it may be. I decided to try the medication Lexapro and so far, the side effects have been terrible. Nausea, unable to eat, diarrhea, insomnia, you name it, I've had it. But today for the first time in 2 months I feel HOPEFUL. I feel optimistic. I feel like this medication is actually doing something to my brain. I know it can take about a month to fully feel all of the effects from the medication but holy cow, this feeling is so relieving. I'm just taking it a day at a time, even a hour by hour. The feelings and emotions come in waves. I'm so thankful for modern medicine and that I had the courage to pursue what was best for me and my mental health. I know that I'm nowhere near where I should be, there are still lots of things I need to do to work on myself.. but I'm slowly getting there. And I'm damn proud of myself for taking the next step.
​
I would love to hear how everyone else is doing after taking their mental health into their own hands, so please please share your stories. <3

I feel like I'm going crazy. Since the current "in" thing for right wing Christians is hating on the LGBT+ community I feel like I've seen them call us "child molesters" every single day. Seriously? (BTW I know it's always been a thing it's just out of control right now.)
This is coming from Christians. Who's churches have had thousands of actual high profiles cases of real child molestation. Who have had huge scandals, generations of abuse and cover up stories. I can't even count the amount of news articles of read of priests and pastors and reverends who abuse little kids and then the churches try cover it up. Yet they call LGBT people child molesters? The hypocrisy of it actually kills me.
I don't have children, but if I did I'd much rather have LGBT people babysit them than let them go anywhere near Christian people or a church as I feel like the rate of a child being molested goes up significantly from even entering those spaces.
I know these people don't have the stereotype of being intelligent but throwing these words around with the history that Christian and Catholic churches have is frankly just embarrassing for them.