Mta express bus schedule
2010.06.18 03:02 coned88 The Bronx
2010.02.18 19:44 tomatohs Rutgers University
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2023.03.29 02:28 ParkRangerDan A lot of these posts tear me up inside.
I'm late diagnosed, and I just found this community. I scrolled through a couple of posts, and all were very relatable. One about a person losing a job sent me into a meltdown last night. About 10 minutes of melting down, screaming, crying, being overwhelmed, and not knowing what to do. It hit me so hard because I've struggled with people my whole life. Socially it's very hard, especially in the workplace. I know how defeating it is. I know the insane amount of anxiety build-up. I know how it feels to be around people who don't care when you open your mouth. I know how it feels when people act really shitty toward me just because I was born a certain way, and I can't change it. I know how it feels to be disrespected and not treated like a human by your co-workers. I would never want anyone to have to go through that. I think I'm an empath because all of this affects me an insane amount. I'm gonna share my story at work, unmasking, anxiety, and other things.
I had a significant turning point for myself when I said. "I can't take this anxiety anymore, I need help." I got an appointment with my doctor and told him about my anxiety/ADHD and work performance struggles(this was before I got diagnosed with autism). He suggested I take Effexor 150mg. After two weeks, the anxiety was gone. I could do my tasks completely fine, and I could talk to people and do my work just fine. He put me on the lowest dosage of 75mg, then to 150mg, which I'm at today. Absolute night and day difference. It really made me feel okay with masking/working with other people, which I still didn't understand I was masking. I then got put on Wellbutrin 150mg because Effexor was causing sexual dysfunction, and Wellbutrin is known to help that. It did help that, but it also did something I did not expect at all. For the first time in my life, it felt like my brain was connected to my body. I started to feel again.
As a recovering people pleaser, I was setting boundaries for the first time in my life. I was now standing up for myself. And I didn't know I needed the dopamine help from Wellbutrin because I got even more productive at work and at home. I can do chores and basic things a lot easier. I genuinely don't know how I could live without Effexor and Wellbutrin. I can't go back to the anxiety, heart palpitations, being overwhelmed, being unable to speak, not being able to shop, and not being able to make food. These medications have given me my life back.
Once I started looking more and more into autism. I realized I've been masking my whole life for 30 years. That was huge for me and opened my eyes a lot. I started getting too "relaxed" at work and had a carefree attitude. I was late a couple of times to work, and my supervisor was okay with it the first two times, but the third time I was late, he told me, "you're not showing that you deserve a position here." He was upset and understandably. But I couldn't help but think of all the times he, other co-workers, and management haven't shown that they deserve a spot on multiple occasions, and it keeps happening, yet I'm the one being told what I've done is unacceptable. Let alone all the times co-workers and management have been disrespectful to me, been late, didn't schedule correctly, and a lot of other crap. That really rubbed me the wrong way. I told him, "I understand what I did was unacceptable. I'm going to reflect on this and come back to you".
Through my reflection time. I realized that my co-workers had never given a shit about me. Management chose favorites and was okay with narcissistic behavior. They devalued the work of others, and when they could tell you were "different" or had trouble socializing, they ostracized you. They would not talk to me, even when I initiated conversation or asked how their weekend was. I could see how disinterested they were when I was speaking. None of them ever initiated a conversation with me. I always had to be the initiator. I would never even get a hello from them. I would have to initiate and say something. If I were to stay quiet, there would be no talking at all, not even a hi or goodbye without me having to initiate that. When I would put in my input or say ideas, I wouldn't be listened to or even acknowledged. Sometimes a hand got put in my face to stop talking. Then they would do my idea after doing the incorrect thing and say, "oh damn, we're so smart."
Through my reflection. I learned that I was disrespected, unvalued, unacknowledged, unseen, unheard, and not given the basic respect humans show to each other. I stopped initiating. I took off my mask and just worked. I was being myself, and it was amazing. On breaks, instead of trying to fit in, I put in my headphones and walked for 15 minutes. I would stay on my task during work, help others, and be diligent. But whenever I would show up for work, I would only say something if someone decided to initiate with me. And with no surprise to me, no one said anything to me. It was always quiet between me, management, and other co-workers. Sometimes they would say hello and ask how I'm doing, but only the friendly manager and supervisor would do this. After a couple of months and me setting a couple of boundaries with my supervisors, they were very receptive. I set a boundary with one co-worker that didn't go well. He took it as a personal attack rather than me trying to explain what he's done in the past is not okay and that I want our work relationship to be good.
My two supervisors ask to speak with me about work. They wanted to talk about my recent performance and how I've been operating at work. They said my recent behavior was affecting "morale" at work. I just laughed...my whole mental, let alone my morale, has been affected for 3 years!!! It was just an absolute joke to me. It was as if I got my arms chopped off and all they did was scrape their elbow..... I told them everything about myself and how I was unmasking, just being myself, and how everyone disrespected me and didn't want to talk to me. They understood and told me I wasn't being fired, but more so, they tried to understand what was happening. I respected and appreciated that they did that. Ultimately, I was beyond burnout from having all these conversations about work, setting boundaries, and putting my foot down/standing up for myself. I knew I had to set more boundaries and have more conversations with people before I felt okay returning to work. I decided to stop working for a while because I was so burnout from all of this, and towards the end of this, I had to put my cat down, and I got ghosted by an awesome woman. At least, I thought she was. All of this happened within two months, and I'm still recovering from it all mentally/physically, which brings me to now. I'm still "on call" at work and thinking about returning. It's been three months since I took the break, and I'm feeling a lot better and finally have the energy to converse with people and set some boundaries.
For anyone that is struggling with their autism. I highly suggest looking into medication. There's a terrible stigma attached to medication. It's infuriating. Look past the societal stigma and help yourself. I would not be anywhere where I am today if It weren't for the help of my medications, Effexor and Wellbutrin.
I also want to share what I learned about defeating social anxiety because that's what I thought I had my whole life. Though this is about social anxiety, it's more about anxiety in general and acceptance. I think it could help this community. Here's my little paper on "Letting go of outcomes."
Letting go of outcomes
Social Anxiety, Autism, ADHD
I'm gonna explain the things I practiced and learned that ultimately killed my social anxiety. It all surrounds one thing, outcomes. I used to spiral, thinking of outcome after outcome. I would create so many different scenarios in my head. It got to a point where I wasn't even comfortable walking to my car, in a grocery store, or in a drive-thru line. The single thought of walking into a room with people in it would add stress to my nervous system. It was insanely tiring, always thinking about what would happen if I did x, y, or z.
I had to learn to let go of outcomes. When I first heard that, it kind of made sense, but it didn't click till a couple of months later. I never thought my anxiety was caused by me wrapping my head in a shit ton of outcomes. It's completely okay for an outcome to be bad and just as okay for it to be good. You will learn from every outcome in your life, be it bad or good. It took a long time to get where I'm now. I got here by practicing letting go of outcomes and thinking about how silly every outcome is. I now look at all my outcomes as nonreal threats and point stuff out about them, but mainly I laugh at them because they are hilarious. "Wow, that outcome's hilarious," "That would be a sad outcome," "Wtf kind of outcome is that" I see them as individual thoughts and scenarios that ultimately will never happen. I end up laughing at how ridiculous every outcome I come up with is.
Next, I learned to trust myself again, especially in the moment. This is crucial for you to live in the present and the now. Besides letting go of outcomes learning to trust myself and being confident in my choices and decisions, genuinely increased my self-confidence tenfold. I started following my feelings on what I should do in the moment, trusting my morals and instincts on what's right or wrong, and living with the outcomes of my decisions. Act on the smallest and largest feelings. If you feel like you need to pee...go pee, don't hold it. Feel like you need to bend over and stretch, but you're in a store, and it would be weird....do it. Feel like you should express feelings towards someone and talk to them about it....do it.
By acting on your feelings and your gut. You start gaining trust in yourself and what you should be doing in the moment. So my rule was, if I needed to pee, I go right away. I don't hold it. After months of doing that, I slowly trusted my gut and feelings by acting on things I felt I needed to do. This calmed me down and allowed me to be okay with the things I chose to do because, at the end of the day, I come out of the experience knowing I did the best thing for myself. It went from listening to my body about peeing to listening to my feelings that I need to talk to a manager about how they made me feel and how it was not okay. It may sound crazy or odd, but I will stretch in a grocery store if I feel like I need to.
I now do what's best for me and accept the outcome of what will or might happen. The biggest thing I learned was that I have answers and will know what to do when the time comes, and if I don't know what to do, that's okay too. Time is your ally. By "doing" and accepting the outcomes, you are just operating as yourself. Thinking about outcomes will cause you to overthink and not make decisions. Leaving you frozen. It creates loads of tension, anxiety, and stress. Let go of the outcome and learn to accept it. This will take time. It will get easier. It will get harder. I hope the best for every one of you.
submitted by ParkRangerDan
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2023.03.29 02:24 M4alice The Man I'm Seeing Constantly Calls Me Fat and Ugly, Haha
The Guy I'm Dating Constantly Calls Me Fat and Ugly, Lol.
I'm dating someone whom I've come to enjoy being around and talking to a lot. We joke around and banter a lot. He tells me I have absolutely nothing to worry about when it comes to my body, but then he also calls out a lot of my physical features in a very negative light. I've expressed that I've had body dysmorphia since elementary school. I've actually never been overweight. Sometimes I look in the mirror and love what I see when I'm fresh out of the shower.
I've been trying to do everything that I can to feel better about myself, but he makes the thoughts in my head audible. I think maybe, "I am fat, I do have stretch marks on my bum, my breasts are too small, I look too muscular, my nose is wide, I look old, etc."
I don't know if he knows how deeply scarred I've been, and I often follow up with some boastful comment about how "So and so" don't think so, but I don't care if "so and so" finds me attractive. I want HIM to find me attractive.
He says it's all jokes, but my worry is that he does this on purpose to make me feel ugly enough to try harder for him. But my other worry is that I'm paranoid, and will eventually try to tear him to shreds before he does it to me. I don't comment on his "below average"-ness or his body, because I understand how deeply scarring it can be. It isn't worth it, because I like him. I'm disappointed in myself for feeling tempted to brutally tear into him. I chose him because I want to give and receive love, not shame or hurt.
I am afraid to open up to him about how his comments really make me feel. It's hard to want to be vulnerable to him. I feel weak. I'm stressed. I'm stressed because I'm allowing someone to cause me stress. I'm stressed because I feel weak in ways I don't feel safe expressing to anyone. I hate that I want his validation constantly.
He assures me every so often that he finds me beautiful and he is there to stay. He puts in a lot of effort to speak with me everyday and is disappointed when it's not 2 hours or more. He drives very far on work nights to see me, and even got his schedule changed so that we can stay longer after gets. His actions say a lot, but it doesn't feel like enough reassurance that he likes and respects the way I do him. I don't even feel comfortable opening up to him or calling him my partner or boyfriend. I would love to do both, but I can't.
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2023.03.29 02:18 blackwidowla LAX - LHR Polaris Lunch (and amenities kit)
Upsides: hot towels and nuts are back, build your own sundae cart is back!!
Downsides: salad was wilted and inedible, all the food options sucked, plate / presentation was extremely underwhelming, same old boring amenities kit. I
submitted by blackwidowla
to unitedairlines [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 02:14 Primary_Reply_670 FACING PROBLEMS WITH KALI LINUX DRIVERS
Guys i wanna help setting my intel graphics drivers,
i have a Intel G41 Express chipset(intel gma 4500) and seems my kali linux isnt detecting it!
i mean it detects that there is a driver and its successfully installed but i cant change my resolution.
FULL DETAILS :System:
Kernel: 6.1.0-kali5-amd64 arch: x86_64 bits: 64 compiler: gcc
v: 12.2.0 Desktop: Xfce v: 4.18.1 Distro: Kali GNU/Linux 2023.1
kali-rolling base: Debian testing
Type: Desktop Mobo: Gigabyte model: G41MT-S2PT v: x.x
serial: BIOS: Award v: F2 date: 12/06/2011
Info: dual core model: Intel Core2 6300 bits: 64 type: MCP
arch: Core2 Merom rev: 2 cache: L1: 128 KiB L2: 2 MiB
Speed (MHz): avg: 1776 high: 1849 min/max: 1600/1867 cores:
1: 1704 2: 1849 bogomips: 7466
Flags: ht lm nx pae sse sse2 sse3 ssse3 vmx
Device-1: Intel 4 Series Integrated Graphics vendor: Gigabyte 4
driver: i915 v: kernel arch: Gen-5 bus-ID: 00:02.0
Display: x11 server: X.Org v: 126.96.36.199 driver: X:
loaded: modesetting unloaded: fbdev,vesa dri: crocus gpu: i915
API: OpenGL v: 2.1 Mesa 22.3.6 renderer: Mesa Intel G41 (ELK)
submitted by Primary_Reply_670
to Kalilinux [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 02:11 NP_alien Why I stopped using transit: Major bus schedule change adds 30m to my commute.
To get home from work, I take the number 20 Heritage from the Foothills hospital and 304 Max Yellow. They changed the schedule last week, and because the 20 is leaving 10m later than usual, I will 100% missed my connecting bus (usually by 1 or 2m). Then I have to wait 20m for the next 304, which often comes late as well. So on an average day, I spend around 30m waiting for a bus. My schedule is fixed, so I'm just getting home 30m later than usual, which is 2.5 hours/week, and 120h/year (48 work week).
People have a bus schedule they are used to, and to change that suddenly is so disruptive. I have sent an email to the city website and another email to my ward council.
But this is why people stop using transit. Because on top of the safety issues, they spring the changes on you and expect you to just deal with it. Hope my emails got read, and they revert the schedule back. I will look into getting a car in the meantime. Parking at Foothills is also a 3 years wait time.
submitted by NP_alien
to Calgary [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 02:00 southernlizing Visit with rheumatologist next week - auto immune or repetitive strain injury?
Hello - 34 year old female that was relatively healthy seven months ago.
I had three chronic knee cap dislocations so had to have a MPFL reconstruction in my right knee in 2017. These kneecap dislocations occurred by doing just normal things - one time I was trying to sit down a chair when it happened, Second time I was bending forward with a bent knee, and third time I was dancing.
In 2018-2019, I was previously diagnosed with right De’Quervains which I wore brace for a few weeks and the issue resolved. I would very occasionally have some pain so I would wear the brace for a few days and issues would completely resolve. I would say I had to wear the brace 2 to 3 times after the original diagnosis.
In late August 2022, I began to have severe right wrist pain. A couple weeks later in September, the same pain began to happen in my left wrist. I never had any prior left wrist pain. This pain also would go up my forearms, into my biceps. De’Quervains was diagnosed again, and I did have swelling in that area.
I got an MRI, which showed a incidental TFCC tear. It is not uncommon for MRIs to come back clear for De’Quervains. After cortisone injections and about four months of physical therapy, my wrist issues lightened up but still did not go away. I had also develop some tingling and pins and needles in the left hand. Typing also aggravated the symptoms so we were under the impression that I had some type of repetitive strain injury. I did decide to go ahead and have surgery. My left wrist was done first, since that was the when I had the most pain in. That was completed January 2022. I had my right wrist release in February 2022.
Since my right hand surgery, I have had some weird issues. My hands turned Blue off and on for a couple weeks. My occupational therapist even noticed it without me mentioning it to her. I have not had this in a couple weeks, but for two weekends in a row, I ran fevers in the 99 to low 100s without any cold symptoms. This is very unlike me because I usually have very normal regulated temperature.
Sometimes I will also experience intermittent dizziness or lightheadedness.
After surgery, I also feel like my pains have worsened. It seems like my right wrist pain has moved into the center of the wrist. I also have tingling and pins and needles in both hands now. I did have elbow pain before, but a week and a half ago, I had 10 out of 10 elbow pain that took several days to resolve. I am also have a shoulder and neck pain now, which started right around 1.5 weeks ago as well.
I'm out of work after the surgeries so typing is no longer aggravating my symptoms. Before surgeries, it was very clear that typing aggravated my symptoms but the aggravation would resolve after a few days. That's no longer the case - my issues are more frequent, though I will have a good day here and there.
One other thing that is odd too, my veins are very prominent now when I feel inflamed. Could never visibly see my veins going up my arm, but I do now most days.
Very very occasionally, I will have a odd feeling one of my feet like a sharp pain or pins and needles. Last night, I even woke up with my left foot completely numb.
A few weeks ago, I did go to my primary care physician who ran blood tests. ANA came back negative. Rheumatoid factor came back okay also. I do have a very slight vitamin D deficiency.
Yesterday, I did have a NCV/EMG, which was normal so no carpal tunnel.
As of today, my orthopedic referred me to a rheumatologist. He did expressed concern that I may have something vascular going on or some type of auto immune issue.
Does anyone have any similar experiences like this? Can anyone providing the insight? I do already have my rheumatologist visit scheduled for next week, but I am curious to see if anyone else has any similar stories. I do miss my old life that I had just only seven months ago, where I could pick up my 2 year son as much as I wanted, go shopping, drive, or work without pain. These are all things I've given up, with the exception of driving since I do need to get around to go to appointments.
submitted by southernlizing
to Autoimmune [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 01:35 SomeOne5577 Appointment soon!
hiii! So i recently talked to a doctor and got an appointment scheduled to see about starting hrt! I’m really excited and a little nervous but mostly excited hehe! I wanted to express my happiness here and also ask what should i expect for the appointment?
submitted by SomeOne5577
to trans [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 00:58 Interesting_Aside515 Some questions about timing + productivity
I recently got prescribed Vyvanse 50mg and I think it works great I was just having a couple scheduling problems with it considering how adhd meds mess with your sleep.
I got to work from 7-4 and I am also a full time student, I get home at 5 and basically have the entire time free to me until I go to sleep to get all of my college stuff done. I've been on Vyvanse for 2 days and I take it at about 9ish am but I've noticed that it's not doing much at around 2 and while I'm a little less unmotivated/tired when I get home than when I am not, it's still not necessarily what I need/am experiencing in the morning. What's the latest that I could take it for it to still be effective for what I need but also not be up all night? Anything helps, of course I will be expressing the concerns to my psych but the appointment isn't for a few weeks so I thought maybe some ideas from here could help.
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to ADHD [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 00:44 lexiebeef How to keep the chemistry and romance when the relationship becomes long-distance (M23 and F23)?
Me and my bf started a relationship 5 months ago, when both of us were living in the same country. The last 5 months have been really good, but now I moved to another country and our relationship transformed into an LDR, at least for a few months. Before this, I thought LDR didnt really work, but now that Im in one, I will fight with every bone on my body to make it work.
I only moved 2 days ago, but I really miss him already and I really wanna make sure we keep up with the great relationship we have now, but I dont really know how to do it. Today we had our first videcall and though it was amazing to see him and talk to him, it kind of made me aware of how hard it is to express romantical and sexual energy via a call. I mean, it was just a normal call - we talked about our days and work and plans - but it wasnt the same as being together and I wanna know how to accentuate chemistry in a video. For example: in real life, when we have nothing to say to the other for a few minutes, I could just lay on his chest and cuddle him for a moment and then talk again about something; in videocall, it just seems awkward and I feel a lot of pressure to not repeat myself, cause there are no distractions (other people, strangers doing something, cute dogs walking...). I know Im probably just not used to it, but I think calls appear to be way more robotic than real life, and that scares me a bit.
Also: I need new ideas of things to do long distance. Were going to start watching a tv show together, but I really dont have more ideas (other than normal calls and texts). Were both busy people and neither have the time to call all day every day, but were going to videocall every two days (and obviously text everyday). Were also going to have date nights a couple of nights a week, but Im not sure what were going to do.
Anyways, Im super scared of LDR, cause 1. its always just the 2 of us (which I love, but I also love when we hang out with our mutual friends, go out to clubs, grab a drink with someone...); 2. calls seem very unromantic, cause were just talking about life with no kissing interruption and seems way more programmed (I hate having to schedule and save things to say to my bf); 3. every LDR date seems the same - just talking about life. I wanna do something different, but I dont really know why.
However, though there are a lot of questions, one thing is for certain: I love this man and Im not gonna give up on us. We just need ideas, and Im sure redditors will help me.
tl; dr: Dont know how to spice LDR up and keep up the relationship romantic and alive
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to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 00:42 AJhlciho I (30F) am starting to resent my disabled sister (25F)
Sorry in advance for the novel. My younger sister Zoey was born when I was 5 years old. I wasn’t old enough to understand why everyone had mixed reactions and big emotions when she was born, but would later come to understand that it was not in fact normal for babies to spend the first year of their life in a hospital and have so many surgeries as a baby. Basically she was born with a really rare genetic condition that left her with minor physical and moderate mental disabilities, and also happens to be autistic.
She was my little bud for my whole childhood. I never experienced what some other siblings of disabled children go through as far as resenting the extra attention that child gets or the limitations on our life as a family in terms of adhering to her strict routines and sensitivities. I loved playing with her and making her laugh, and was always fiercely protective of her.
As an adult, we’re definitely not as close as we used to be. When I moved out a decade ago I stopped being part of her comfort circle, since she is very particular about who she feels comfortable around (basically only people in the house that she sees every day). I would still take her to do fun activities when i came home like the train museum and to see her favorite movies.
Time passes, I get married and start having kids. I currently have a 4 year old, a 2 year old, and 10 month old. I live about 5 minutes away from my parents and am very close (relationally) to my mom. When I had my firstborn everything was still good. My sister wasn’t stoked or anything, but she tolerated having me over to spend time with my parents and didn’t seem to mind the baby too much. We would go to parks together, and family vacations, and my mom could keep the baby overnight whenever I needed a break.
Then my second, Clara was born. Something about Clara sets my sister on high alert. Clara has been super high energy and LOUD from birth. Seriously, this girl’s lungs are from another planet. Loud unpredictable noises have always been extremely overwhelming for Zoey, so I can understand why my second born stresses her out. She acts like a normal toddler, it’s just that everything is at high volume.
First, it started with “we can’t keep Clara for a weekend away, only 24 hours at a time”. That’s understandable, it was a huge privilege to begin with. Then it became “we can’t keep her overnight at all”. Ok still understandable but tough on me to never have that as an option, especially when my third was born. Then it became “you can’t visit two days in a row”. Now only during specific times of the day and never for more than 2 hours or so at a time.
Now I feel like I’m imposing every time I go to my parents house. When I’m in the living room zoey will either stay in her room and tantrum the whole time I’m there (she’ll take all of her clothes out of the dresser and throw them everywhere, sometimes will randomly scream out) or worse, will come out of her room and scream, scaring my children.
There have been a few instances of near violence during zoeys outbursts, which is why my parents have been limiting our exposure to her. One time when Clara was still a small toddler, she toddled too close to where Zoey was sitting and zoey bolted at full speed from her chair to go to her room, but knocked Clara over in the process, which was obviously scary and upsetting to a baby. Two similar things have happened (Zoey feeling trapped and bolting) but both of those incidents have resulted in adults being body checked out of the way. One was my 70 year old mother in law, and the other was me while I was pregnant with my third. Neither time was Clara anywhere near Zoey, we haven’t let that happen since the first incident, but literally just being in the same house as her is apparently just as triggering now. Zoey usually stays in her room the whole time we’re there, but if Clara laughs particularly loudly or play-screams when my dad tickles her we will hear a ruckus from Zoeys room, which is usually her throwing toys or clothes at the wall.
My parents are in over their heads. Zoey has never had behavioral issues like this, but her life has also been very carefully managed and scheduled up to this point. Idk what a realistic solution is, since it seems like her aversion to me and my kids is getting worse by the day. It doesn’t make sense for my parents not to be able to come to any events where I’ll be with my kids because they’re my parents and my kids grandparents. Up until I had kids I was the go-to babysitter for Zoey so they could do things like go on vacation by themselves, but that’s obviously not an option anymore. They also haven’t found a babysitter that Zoey is comfortable with so leaving her home while they come visit me isn’t an option yet.
Idk if I’m just venting or actually asking for advice, I just needed to get everything off my chest. I’m really starting to resent my sister and even my parents to some extent, even though I understand why they’re putting limits on me visiting them. I just had a completely different picture of what my relationship with my parents and kids was going to look like. I wanted us to be able to go on family vacations together, and my kids love visiting their house because of their big beautiful yard.
It’s also worth noting that while Zoey has shown an aversion to other small kids before, she doesn’t act this way with my older brothers kids at all. My brother’s two girls are much more reserved and quiet than mine are though, so I suspect that is the reason behind it. I don’t want to give the impression that my kids are some kind of horribly behaved hellions either though. They are just very energetic and are always on the move, and Clara in particular just has an unusually loud lung capacity for a toddler, so when she vocalizes and laughs like most kids do it just carries really far. We joke that she’s going to be an opera singer when she grows up.
I want to be sensitive to the fact that Zoey is autistic and sensory overload is a real thing, but I don’t know how to figure out where the line is between being sensitive to a beloved family member with a disability and my right to have a relationship with my parents and my kids to have a relationship with their grandparents is. My parents love my kids and have also expressed that they are frustrated by the situation, but they also don’t seem like they know what to do to improve it.
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2023.03.29 00:22 thegreatmanrabbit [AITA] Bicycling Edition
Hoping that this type of post is allowed, but wanted some input from some fellow cyclists. Tl;dr at the end in case this gets too long
I recently got a contact for a bike fitter who runs his own business out of his house. He is a retired professional athlete and well educated and experienced in biking fitting. Based on his credentials I decided to go to him, despite him being more expensive than a bike fit at most shops.
He lives about 45 minutes away, but it’s not a great drive to get there (tolls, congested highways, etc). The day I was scheduled for my fit he asked me if I could pick up a bike part and bring it with me which was about 40 minutes out of my way. I obliged even though the part was not for me and I had nothing to gain from it.
Fit went well, pretty thorough, seemed to be very knowledgeable. Afterwards he said he needed a couple of days to make the adjustments and swap some parts so I agreed to leave the bike. I also bought some parts from him to make the bike fit better, and the total was about $850
A couple days go by, I pick up my bike, and have a ride planned for the next day. Once home I realize he didnt return my GPS mount. Texted him to confirm and he said he misplaced it and couldnt find it. Annoying, but fine, I rode without one and bought a new one on Amazon for $15. No offer to reimburse from him, and I didnt ask.
I drop the bike off again for another upgrade of parts that I bought through him. Originally he said 2 days, but he couldnt get a part off and dropped it off to his mechanic to help. 5 days later he asks me to pick it up from the mechanic instead, which is a longer drive and worse area to drive in. Annoying, but I oblige
I get there and my bike is missing my saddle bag which has my flat kit and multitool that I use for everything including putting my bike on the trainer. I text him about it and all I get is a “sorry mate.”
I tell him that he needs to drop it off to me or express mail it so that I have it for my next ride and if he doesnt I will buy a new saddle bag, flat kit, and multitool and deduct it from what I owe him for the final upgrade.
He then proceeds to call me and when I express how inconvenient this has been and that Im dissatisfied with the service Ive gotten he calls me “ungrateful” and says he “isnt sure if he wants me as a customer” now.
Would I be the asshole if I buy replacements for my things and deduct it from what I owe?
Tl;dr: Bike fitter misplaced my Garmin mount and didnt return my saddle bag, then calls me ungrateful when I say Im going to buy replacements and charge him for it
submitted by thegreatmanrabbit
to bicycling [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 00:15 PracticalJewel919 AITA for telling my boyfriend that he can't spend Easter with me ?
I 24 F and my bf of one year (24) met at university while I was in my 4th year of medical school and he was in his final year of a science major .We met while on hall and we were able to leave together briefly for a month before he completed his degree.Since that time he started his masters at the same university but I am no longer on campus as I am doing clinical rotations elsewhere .We have been able to see each other throughout the year.He has come to visit about several times including Christmas and I also visit him when I go to campus for exams.
The problem is I am now in my final year of medical school doing my last clinical rotation to be specific. And I have final exams in a couple of months .He asked of he could visit for Easter and I said that would not be the best thing as I have a lot of work to get done and he would inadvertently distract me.I told him that if he however still wanted to visit the best I could do is allow him to stay one day .He was silent for a while and later expressed that he had made alot of sacrifices to accommodate me while we were staying together for that month on campus and I am not willing to do the same for him .
When I had asked what sacrifice he said he changed his sleep schedule to accommodate me :his slept early (7pm) and wake in the middle of the night to study and then would go back to sleep .I however study and go to my bed around 12 a.m.He started following my routine.I didn't ask him to do this .He also state that he would be busy sometimes but still accommodated me when I wanted to talk .
I was also a student and I also made time for him however I don't see what I did as making a sacrifice .I told him I thought he would be more understanding of the situation and asked what would he have liked me to do . I have a lot of work to get done and not a lot of time so I feel that this is best .So Aita for telling my bf he can't spend Easter with me ?
submitted by PracticalJewel919
to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]
2023.03.29 00:12 Mahaliger Schedule builder won’t let me add MKT 3600 for summer course
Schedule builder isn’t allowing me to enroll in MKT 3600 even though I’m a bus com major with over 45 credits. What should I do? Last class I need too graduate!
submitted by Mahaliger
to Baruch [link] [comments]
2023.03.28 23:50 DocBasher My (34M) girlfriend (32F) is going on a cruise with her mom during our two year anniversary and I don’t know how to handle it
My (34m) girlfriend (32f) is at the beach/going on a cruise on a girls trip with her mom. The trip was planned months ago by her mom according to my girlfriend, and the idea was that it would be just the two of them since they haven’t had a girls trip in a long time. I’m not really upset about that part of it, and think that’s pretty cool.
The problem is that her mom scheduled the trip such that they will be gone on our 2 year anniversary. Not only did my girlfriend forget our anniversary date, but for several months where she could’ve talked to her mom about rescheduling the dates, she didn’t.
I’m not the type of person that is super into holidays or things like that. I hate holidays in general, except for St Patrick’s Day and Veterans Day. I don’t even like celebrating my own birthday because I’m introverted and really don’t like being the center of attention. But anniversaries are kind of a big deal for me. It’s a solid excuse to go out for a special date night, have some good food/drinks, and reminisce about good and bad over the last orbit around the sun, while looking forward to another year together.
She’s apologized. But words are intrinsically meaningless absent of any action. She had several months to try and rectify it, but chose not to.
I don’t even want to talk to her. I’m mad, hurt, angry, and disappointed. She will be on a boat with her mom and I will be alone on our anniversary. I don’t have family (except for my daughter who will be with her mom). I guess maybe I’ll pick up a shift at work or something. Idk.
I guess my question is simple: How do I handle this? This wasn’t an oopsie mistake. There was time to fix this…months. I’ve expressed the way I feel and have multiple times. She apologizes, but still goes through with it and I’m having trouble letting go because of the magnitude of this and I don’t know how to handle it.
Thanks in advance.
tl;dr: gf is going on a cruise with her mom during our 2 year anniversary leaving me to celebrate alone and I don’t know what to do.
submitted by DocBasher
to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2023.03.28 23:45 FickleDecision8178 AITA for asking to see the lease?
I wanted to move out somewhere close to home and to my new job. My friend's friend "Monica" is renting nearby, but because she's studying abroad and the person who was supposed to rent in her place backed out at the last minute, the apartment will be available in April. My friend "Dina" is currently helping her out by renting for this month.
I went to visit the apartment on Sunday. Thankfully, the neighborhood isn't so bad and the commute from home is just one bus ride away. Commute to work requires two buses but it should be less than an hour.
I like the apartment and expressed an interest in subletting next month. The roommate emailed me yesterday explaining that she couldn't access the lease due to maintenance issues on the rental portal, but sent me a welcome packet she received for the move in/key release form. When I said I understood and asked when she thinks she could get the lease to me, she asked me why I would need it since I won't be signing anything. She said she and "Monica" don't feel like I need to see it. I've been taught that it's not good to rent without checking the lease because the lease has the correct rent price and indicates whether subletting is allowed by the owner. I know others who have paid rent to the people on the lease while those people weren't paying anything. Without the lease, how do I know that B isn't paying less than she's telling me? How do I know that I won't get in trouble for subletting at that unit?
AITA for wanting to see the lease? I feel like I might be.
submitted by FickleDecision8178
to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]
2023.03.28 23:12 bugg_hunterr My path blew up in my face.
I have bachelors degree in Agriculture and Natural Resource Management and moved to CO where I got a masters degree in Bioagricultral Sciences and Pest Management AKA Entomology. Upon graduating my graduate committee asked me what I wanted to do career wise, and I told them "Commercial Insect Production/Insect Farming" interested me, but ultimately I wanted to do something good for people and the environment They told me that was unsustainable (the insect farming part) and that I should keep my options open.
Upon graduating I immediately became an exterminator because other work was scarce and there were lots of openings. I hated it. It was the exact opposite of what I wanted to do, but I needed the money. It wasn't worth though, it was soul crushing, and I eventually started having some bad reactions to the chemicals we were using. I phased out of that and went into wildlife management. Once again, I hated it. I basically spent 2.5 years, 1 year with a county government, 1.5 with a private company gassing prairie dogs. The work was physically draining, the pay/benefits were shit, and once again, it was soul crushing. The work was also seasonal which means there anywhere from 4-5 month long breaks where I wasn't getting paid. It wasn't anywhere near what I wanted to do with my life.
Eventually I decided I was going to buckle-down and seriously pursue a career in insect farming/breeding. I polished my resume and cover letter, and got super active on LinkdIn. Then I connected with a guy who was part of an Insect Consulting group (for farms, zoos, etc.) and he gave me great advice! Advice which eventually led me to an insect farm where I thought was going to pursue my "dream job/career". I sat down with the business owner (We'll call them owner 1, because there co-owners). Owner 1 was impressed with my education, my previous experience and overall knowledge. They invited me to take the position of "Insect Farm Manager". They told me they had set up cricket farms before, had an algorithm for tracking insect growth and breeding, and that they had a "system" in place to get everything set-up successfully. After some negotiations I we agreed on a $44k a year salary with no benefits. This is ridiculously low for a 30 year old with a masters degree living in CO, but it was more than I had ever earned in my life, so I accepted.
Things almost immediately began to not go so well. Upon arriving co-owner 1 & 2 were still debating on how to set up the cages (we did all our cricket breeding in cages inside of a cargo-container). There was also no power. They attempted to set up their own solar panels, but couldn't get them to work, so we relied on a gas powered generator to power our entire operation for the first 2 months. Of course I was the one that drove back and forth buying gasoline. There wasn't a system set-up for getting our own water, so I was the one that drove back and forth filling 5gallon water jugs at Walmart. In addition, the algorithim they had didn't work. They "fixed it" AT LEAST once a month the entire time I was there and upon leaving it still wasn't working right. Needless to say the "system" wasn't working. When I brought up some of these concerns I was ignored by owner 1, even though owner 2 (who was our engineer, handy-man, and one of the financial backers) agreed with me.
Despite being told I was being hired partially for consultations reasons my advice was ignored. Upon noticing the floors in our breeding area were filthy and covered in debris I encouraged everyone to sweep and mop and that we should get everything off the ground that we can. Despite the fact that owner 2 agreed with me, owner 1 told me, more than once they didn't sweep or mop the floors on site because they "Didn't feel like it" and didn't see any possible way to move things off the ground. Less than a month later we developed an issue with dermestid beetles, that became so out of hand they started to breed in the same cages we kept our crickets. I noticed when I walked into the container in the morning (sometimes owner 1 would stop by in the evening to do some on-site work) that some of the cage fronts were left slightly askew, allowing adult crickets to escape. I suggested we keep a better eye on the fronts, but was simply told by owner 1 "Accidents happen sometimes". And crickets continued to escape. This is bad, because the adult crickets would break into the hatchery room and start devouring babies and eggs. I recommended we place a "cricket trap" in there to catch adults, but was told both that it wouldn't work and there wasn't enough room. I placed a trap in there anyway and the amount of adults feeding on eggs/hatchlings dropped by 38% in the first month. I also noticed several things on-site that could lead to rodent issues. I was ignored and sure enough we had multiple mice living in the same cargo-container we kept our food supply in, exposing it to rodent feces. I expressed all of this to owner 1, who ignored me, but owner 2 listened, agreed and even tried to talk with owner 1.
Then the new year started and things got worse. We were supposed to start making sales in January. Apparently we had multiple business "locked in". But we didn't make a single sale in January or February. The Cricket farm was owned by a larger conglomerate run by some "shady-boomer" (owner 1's description, not mine). She was waiting on this shady boomer to send a sleezy salesmen (owner 1's description, not mine) to come an help us make sales. As we continued to not make sales and the sleezy salesmen hadn't shown up, both owner 2 and myself offered to help with sales, but owner 1 refused our help. After going back and forth like this for a while I expressed all my concerns to owner 2 who said he's talk with owner 1. Owner 1 intentionally avoided talking to owner two for 2 weeks, comply because they didn't want to have the talk. When they finally did have the talk it seemed like they were both on the same page, and like things were going to be fine. They weren't.
About two week ago owner 1 shows up on the job and says they need to talk to me. Apparently the business was "bleeding money" and they couldn't afford to keep me on salaried or full time. But they MIGHT be able to give me 8 hours a week at $16 an hour. They did this with no warning or notice.
I was devastated. I spent the next three days in bed switching between depression episodes and anxiety attacks. And now here I am. I gave everything to this business.
This is the first job where I've ever gone "above and beyond". I constantly engaged in tasks not listed in my contract including but not limited running errands, the installation of flooring, researching products to use one site, researching potential buyers, reading and consolidating information (off the clock) from scientific articles to use on-site, and I even developed a commerically viable breeding program for mealworms FROM THE GROUND UP, BY MYSELF (off the clock).
My car was old and I spent the last bit of mileage in it fetching gasoline, water, and other supplies for the farm. It literally started making it's death rattle on a Friday. The next day I found out it was unsafe to drive and basically dead. Thankfully my gfs and my schedules lined up just right to where I could use her car. When I told owner 1 she didn't want gas-cans in her car we "suddenly" had a fix for our power issues the next day. Upon telling one of the owners I expected to be paid (I then sent the money to my gf) for mileage picking up water. Within 5 business days we suddenly had our own water system set up. Now I don't have a car, and they didn't pay me enough/keep me on enough to save for another one and now I'm stuck in a situations where I need a car, can't afford one, and don't have money coming in.
During the holidays I hurt my back REALY bad. So bad my gf had to help me us the bathroom, dress me, get food etc. I needed more time to recover but owner 1 said they REALLY needed me on-site after I had taken one week off to heal from a BACK INJURY. Despite being in excruciating pain, I went back to work. My back still hasn't fully recovered. I wasn't given health insurance and I wasn't paid enough to see a doctor out of pocket. In addition to this I was diagnosed with clinical depression and anxiety roughly 15 years ago and It's gotten worse over the past few years. Once again, I wasn't provided health insurance or paid enough to see a therapist out of pocket.
I've fucked myself even further because when my family and friends of the family told me that if I "Worked hard, went to college, and stayed out of trouble with the law" that everything would simply "work out" for me, and I was stupid enough to believe them. Now I'm 31, in more debt than I can ever pay off, I have no useful skills (handyman/automotive stuff, tech skills, business stuff, etc), I've had a new job almost every year since graduating( none of which have payed well enough to survive), no savings/retirement, no car, a bad back, depression and anxiety, and honestly, no hope. I have no hope for the future, either my own or the worlds.
Since losing my job I've been doing my best to reach out and apply for jobs. All I've gotten so far is silence, rejection, and some part-time farm work that won't schedule an interview until they've actually spoken to 3 different references (apparently one of my VERY FEW professional references has gone non-responsive), which seems weird for part-time farm work, I don't think anyone actually bothered to ever call my references. I've even reached out to government jobs, even though I almost always receive no response or get rejected from them.
In September inflation hit which made my salary not worth as much. In October my car died. In November I caught covid (despite being vaxxed and boosted), In December I hurt my back. In January I caught the stomach flu. In February I found out other people in similar positions, background, and experience were earning 15-30% more than I was...after taxes, health, vision, and dental. I've taken so many "L's" over the past 6 months, I feel utterly defeated.
I only have three real talents (this isn't just me, these are things others have expressed out loud): I' good with animals, I'm decent at writing, and apparently I give good spiritual (Neopagan) advice. There's no way to make a living with those skills. No on cares about any of those things, at least, not enough to pay for rent, savings, etc. I'm 100% useless. I'm half tempted to just give up.
But I'm here to try and avoid that. I need advice on, well, finding a path since what I thought would be my career blew up in my face. I don't have any real passions any more, and the things I am passionate about don't matter in the real world. There no living to be made in attempting to do something that's good for the earth and for people. How is someone with useless degrees, no skills, and a failing body and mind supposed to make a living? How do I find my path? Is there even a path for me? Honestly, I'm lost, scared, and don't really know what else to do.
Sorry for the novel.
PS- Yes, I'm aware I should see a therapist. Unless you're willing to cover the entire cost for treatment don't bother bringing it up, because I can't afford it.
submitted by bugg_hunterr
to findapath [link] [comments]
2023.03.28 22:38 Omansurver A text-based work of art inspired by a certain piece of media, created by a fan of said media, which follows the same or an alternate universe of the aforementioned media artwork. Or, a fan fiction.
Dunno if y'all will like this, or if it will even remain up, but a bit of a DISCLAIMER; The first chapter is more akin to a prologue than an actual part of a story, but it is required for the story to make sense, as the story needs a lot of world building and explanation for everything to work out, and unless y'all wanna be confused for the next three chapters, then I suggest you read, unless you aren't interested of course. Oh yeah, it was so long that I needed to post the first chapter in multiple parts, so get comfy, and prepare to read almost forty pages in total.
Chapter One - Part One
Extremely Lengthy Exposition
He didn’t know how to describe it.
A sort of lucid state in which he was only partially aware of who and what he was? Maybe. A condition of some sort of brain death, it being a result of gazing upon an entity far too complex for the human mind to ever even dream of conceiving? Perhaps. Or maybe it was a sign. A sign from whatever gods or higher beings that were our forefathers, our creators. The very things that created the universe, and all others as we know it. Perhaps it was a sign from Them, of his ascension, his final evolution into a being so superior, that to others, he could be considered a god himself. Yes, that was right. He could feel it, the power. Not in a way of touching something with a hand, but in a more metaphysical way, one far better than the crude grasping tools that humanity has had to work with for far too long.
It was so close, the innate understanding that was intrinsically tied into the human genome from eons ago, the inheritance he was meant to receive, what he DESERVED to receive, was right there. All he had to do was reach out, and touch it. He did just that, his mental probes extending outwards towards it, to claim what was rightfully his. He closed his fingers around it, and-
“Jacob, wake up. The doctor is trying to say something to you.”
Or it could just all be a construct of his dying brain, one that was futilely trying to sort the things that he was experiencing into something that could be translated and read.
“Jacob?” His mother repeated, with a more stern note entering her voice.
“Oh uh, sorry. What were you trying to say?” Jacob leaned forward, clasping his hands together, placing his elbows on his knees and leaning on his arms.
“I was asking you how you’ve been feeling recently, as it does pertain to the conversation I am having with your parents.” The doctor smiled patiently, expertly hiding most of his probable frustration behind a veneer of placidity.
“Relatively well, though I have been having a good amount of headaches, considerably more than usual.” Jacob responded, plastering a nonchalant expression onto his face.
“And what about that little . . . episode you had a moment ago?” The doctor questioned, leaning forward expectantly.
“Oh yeah, that. I guess I just kinda zoned out there for a second, you know?” Jacob replied casually.
“Zoned out for over half an hour?” The doctor tilted his head.
“Yep.” Jacob wasn’t going to fall for the bait.
“Hmm.” The doctor leaned back. “Well, I'm fairly sure that ‘zoning out’ for over half an hour with absolutely no idea what's going on in the outside world isn’t exactly normal behavior typical for a boy of your age, Jacob. Did you perchance have any sort of feeling that you can’t explain, or something similar to an out of body experience? It could even just be similar to lucid dreaming.” The doctor appears to be very insistent, Jacob, why don’t you take care of him? You could be out of state within a day or tw-
“Well when you put it like that, sure.” Jacob decided that he would indeed play the doctor’s game.
“Hmm. Well Mrs. Pattine, you heard it from him. When we did our testing last week, we noticed extremely irregular brain patterns that would normally indicate extreme stress upon the brain. However, Jacob here seemed perfectly fine, aside from a rather annoying headache.”
“Now, I’m fairly sure that anybody could deduce that that type of behavior from the brain isn’t good at all. In fact, the tumor that we had diagnosed Jacob the same week, being practically the size of a peanut, has now doubled in size. In fact, the growth appears to be scaling upwards in terms of the growth rate. What was doubling in size per week, will quickly grow to quadrupling, and then quintupling. Soon, Jacob will have to undergo intense chemotherapy.”
Jacob’s mother did not seem placated, like what the doctor was trying to do, but in fact appalled.
“Why are you saying all this in front of him!? He’s just a child for damn sake!” Jacob's mother clutched Jacob tighter, much to his both amusement and frustration after she refused to let go.
“I’m sorry Mrs. Pattine, but all parties involved here have to know what’s at stake here, including young Jacob here.” The doctor, to his credit, did seem genuinely remorseful, yet not really backtracking enough to make an effective apology, more like creating a plausible justification for his actions.
Jacob didn’t really care either way. Well, he did care that he was probably going to die and was thankful that the doctor had decided to be blunt, but not caring about his mother’s rather extreme outburst in his supposed defense.
That had been the case as of late, not really caring about his loved ones. Well, he DID care, at least he thought he did, but why did they always have to be just, so, well, like that all the time? Jacob was rather exasperated from the whole ordeal, and plus, the doctor was talking again.
“-however, we have a solution to this problem of Jacob’s.” The doctor reached out to the briefcase on the table to his right, opening it. He then extracted what appeared to be a syringe filled with clear liquid.
“This is a prototype we, us being ANTI, have been working on for a long time. You might have learned what this is from various pop culture and media sources, but if you don’t, I’ll explain what it is now.” Without giving anybody in the room time to protest, he continued on.
“This is a syringe full of nanobots. Yes, honest-to-god, genuine nanobots. We’ve been working on these for a good amount of time, since around 2000, yet no significant headway had been made towards making a nanobot serum cost-effective enough to employ in more, liberal, uses.”
“However, when Russia annexed Crimea back in 2014, Congress decided that a viable threat was rising, and revived the program with a stimulant called cold hard cash. When another budget increase came with the Russian invasion of Ukraine, it didn’t exactly hinder us, and a year later, we came up with the first effective prototype of nanotechnological biological cellular regeneration to date. And now, we're gonna give it to Jacob.”
Mrs. Pattine didn’t appear to care about all of the war stuff or fancy political words, only really catching onto the words of, “give it to Jacob” and responded accordingly.
“I don’t believe it. What's the catch?” Mrs. Pattine glared suspiciously at the doctor.
“No catch, just the requirement that we are given full liberty to experiment on the tumor in Jacob’s head, within legal bounds.” The doctor appears to be trying to brush over that fact, but Mrs. Pattine also catches onto the important bits.
“You want to experiment on my son!? That sounds like a pretty big catch to me!” Mrs. Pattine screeches in protest.
“It’ll be within full humane laws, nothing illegal, I promise you. In fact, we’ll give you even more incentive.” The doctor pauses, seemingly for dramatic effect.
“So, out with it!” Mrs. Pattine seems to be quite stressed, and most likely wants nothing more than to just go home already.
“We will give you a sum of thirty million dollars, with no tax put on it.” The doctor says plainly.
Mrs. Pattine doesn’t react for a moment, seemingly processing what she just heard.
“Th-th-thirty million dollars!?” Mrs. Pattine splutters in disbelief. “You can’t be serious!”
The doctor chuckles. “Oh but I am. We’ll place it directly into your bank account, as liquid assets would likely be hard to manage for you. It’ll even be covered by insurance.”
Mrs. Pattine clearly is still suspicious. “This is too good to be true.”
“I can assure you, Mrs. Pattine, it is not.”
She looks unsure as to whether or not to take the deal, and looks at Jacob.
“Go ahead.” Jacob shrugs, hoping to maybe NOT die.
Mrs. Pattine then gets up. “I need to go over this with my family.”
They accepted the deal.
* * *
Three days later, Jacob was inside a chamber packed with men and women in lab coats, all of them seeming to be doing something important. The room was about twenty feet in diameter and in height, circular, with a large ten-foot-high blast door being the only intentional access point that could be used to enter the chamber. A large secure industrial vent was inset into the ceiling, also covered with a steel mesh to prevent something from getting in, or perhaps out. In the center of it all was a large contraption, with many pipes, hoses, and wires protruding from various access ports around the machine. It all seemed a bit too militaristic for a minor cryo experiment, but what did he know?
On the front of the machine in the center of the room was a thick plastic cover that exposed the interior, the interior being a cavity about eight feet tall and two feet wide. It appeared to have been designed to allow a human to rest upright inside the machine, and rest comfortably to boot, utilizing a foam mold to mimic a bed. In fact, the little foam mold appears to be fitted to Jacob’s exact dimensions. Jacob, being the ever-curious fellow, inquired as to what the strange doohickey.
“So uh, what am I looking at here?” Jacob gestured to the machine in the center of the room.
“This is, for all intents and purposes, a cryo pod. It can effectively freeze a human being, preserving them for extended periods of time, without them growing or aging at all.” The doctor, who appeared to be in charge of this whole ordeal, answered him.
“And you’re putting me in there?” Jacob asked.
“Yes. We are hoping to learn more about that little tumor-that-isn’t-a-tumor in your head, as it's something that we haven’t ever seen before. Since the tumor is progressing at an alarmingly fast pace, and since we don’t want you to die, we will be placing you in this for a single year, on the dot. The freeze will stop the progression of the tumor, and the nanobots will keep you in top shape even if something goes wrong with the pod, and they will even combat the tumor, so you aren’t in any danger.” The doctor replied.
“Huh. And you’re gonna find some sort of miracle cure for the tumor while I’m on ice?” Jacob asked, wanting to get all of the essential information.
“Yes.” The doctor didn’t elaborate this time.
“Uh, cool. So we’re starting now? I was wondering why I was in this weird looking wetsuit thingy.” Jacob pulled at his sleeves, the tightness of them a little uncomfortable.
“Yes. Once the specs have been fully calibrated, we can place you in the pod, and you can say goodnight.” The doctor nodded to himself. “Yes, it should only be ten more minutes.”
* * *
Fifteen minutes later, a bit over schedule, everything was set up. Jacob was standing in front of the cryo pod, talking to one of the doctors.
“So I just step inside, right?” Jacob inquired.
“Correct you are. We’ll strap you up, run diagnostics, and then see you in t- a year.” The lady, Dr. Sophia Vasel by her nametag, appeared to have stopped herself from saying something was either a simple misspoken word, or something she wasn’t supposed to say. It didn’t really matter to Jacob, since you could just kill her, now and be done with it. It would be so easy, to ju-
“Alright, nice.” Jacob stepped up inside, a little stepladder conveniently set into the machine. He turned around and shifted a little, trying to get comfortable. Dr. Vasel and one other doctor began strapping him in, hooking little electrodes and wires up to him to do all sorts of technical mumbo jumbo. After a minute of attaching devices to him and making sure everything was in order, they began to run diagnostics to make sure everything electronic was working. After an agonizingly long ten minutes of affirming and reaffirming, the first doctor that he had met with walked up to the plastic clear door with a microphone in his hand.
“Can you hear me Jacob?” The doctor asked.
“Yeh.” Jacob replied lamely
“Uhm, OK, it seems like everything is alright on our side, so without further ado, I think we’ll be seeing you in a year.” The doctor nodded to his colleagues next to him, and they started to press buttons on the console. A loud alarm started blaring, and a hissing noise spread throughout the pod. Devices began to inject what was probably some sort of powerful anesthetic, considering he began feeling extremely drowsy a moment later.
The last thing he saw before he fell asleep was the plastic cover being coated in frost.
* * *
Three weeks after that, a government official of the program that had taken Jacob Pattine in for treatment and experimentation contacted the Pattine family to offer their condolences, as they had to inform them that due to a malfunction in the systems of the nanobots, Jacob Pattine had unfortunately died in testing, and that they hoped this won’t sour relations between them.
However, it did sour relations between them, as the subsequent lawsuit against them proved all too well. It had even progressed to a Supreme Court case called Pattine v Army Nanotechnological Initiative, which ended up with a seventy-two million dollar payment towards the Pattines, and a ruling that outlawed any and all with the use and/or experimentation on humans with nanotechnology, as it was deemed too dangerous to use on humans. A deep-dive into the records of the ANTI yielded many discoveries, the most notable of them being the many deaths of humans in the testing trials of the nanobots. This also led to the dissolution of the ANTI, and shaped the future of nanotechnology for years to come.
However, using nanobots for the use on humans didn’t stop there. In fact, some would say it thrived, just in a different way than imagined. Like many other creations that were found to be too radical or immoral for the majority of the populace, the CIA was the one to collect the scraps, and make it their own. By using their own funding to revive the unofficially named Nano-Cryo project, they resumed research, employing many of the original members of the infamous project, with the doctor being put back in charge of the currently unnamed project.
That left only Jacob to deal with. Luckily for him, Jacob wasn’t so disposable as some might believe, as certain conditions on his being made his potential quite desirable to some shadowy heads of certain organizations. This led to the CIA creating a cover story about the unfortunate death of the boy, which would allow them to both obtain the asset, and snip off the loose thread that was ANTI, killing two birds with one stone. They continued testing within CIA Black Site-046, which was located within the city known as New Jersey, which would later influence the name of the secretive project.
One more alteration would be made to the test. As Jacob had now been cut off from the outside world and was presumed dead, the CIA had no worry about public retribution, allowing them to extend his period in the cryo pod from one year to ten. At the end of the ten years, Jacob would be woken up from stasis, and testing would be enacted, with various procedures analyzing how his physiology had reacted to the tumor and the extended stay in cryostasis. The nanobots were there to ensure that Jacob didn’t die from the tumor, but also to make sure he didn’t die from the long periods of time spent sleeping. After twenty-four hours had passed, Jacob would be placed back within the cryo pod, and be woken up again when another ten years had passed, with this cycle repeating for the foreseeable future.
In the development of the cryostasis model, one thing had persisted throughout the trials. When the testers had been subjected to extended periods of time within stasis, once unfrozen, the brain would refuse to reactivate. No matter what measures were taken, the brain would simply not resume biological function, and the subject would be effectively dead. The leading theory on this was that the brain had been “dead” for so long, that it simply couldn’t remember that it was alive. This is the same reason why cavemen, even if perfectly preserved in ice, couldn’t be simply revived with a shock paddle or some adrenaline.
So, the nanobots were there to stimulate and keep the brain semi-active during time spent sleeping, keeping the brain alive through the barest of actions, making it more akin to sleep instead of simply dying and then being revived with a perfectly preserved body and brain. However, this led to the tumor being slightly active as well, so it would still progress while within stasis, albeit at an incredibly glacial pace. This would likely cause problems in the future, but a solution is bound to come up at some point.
* * *
What an interesting word
And a nice one at that. It really just rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it? A word that most people probably can’t even recall the meaning of, yet is seen so commonly in works that are often above the skill of your average eighth grader. It means for something to happen a lot, or always. For instance, you could say, “Oh, whenever I go to my friend's house, the meals his mother makes are invariably burnt.” or something along those lines.
Jacob couldn’t apply that word to his situation.
That would imply that he had been doing or experiencing something for long enough that he could use that word as a hyperbole. However, he hadn’t. In fact, it was quite the opposite. Imagine blinking your eyes. Now try to recall how long the moment between opening your eyes and the light reaching your eyes was. Now that's a more accurate comparison.
Right when Jacob closed his eyes, he had been hearing a hissing sound, expecting sleep to take him. Then a slight, rather odd blip in his awareness caused him to lose his bearings for a moment, but quickly regained them. The hissing continued, and became rather annoying after a bit, considering the nasty headache he currently had. Did he have that before he entered the pod? He wasn’t sure, but he was having a hard time remembering his last moments before he entered the machine, which was odd, as that was just a moment ago. Oh, now the hissing noise is stopping, so Jacob guessed that the doctors realized there was a problem, and were now spooling down the machine to take him out before something disastrous happened.
The hissing noise stopped, and the sound of pistons groaning filled the small cavity instead, along with a notable difference in the positioning of the cryo pod door, specifically moving upward. Ah, now the door is opening, fantastic. Jacob hoped that he could just get this damn experiment underway, without any more delays.
Goddamn the door is slow. At least he could see somewhat outside, as the door had opened up enough to let him see the feet of two people standing outside his little home. Actually, scratch that, three people standing outside, as the door had opened more up to let him see a third person standing behind the pair that were closest to him. He blinked several times to clear the fog from his eyesight, his eyeballs feeling pretty cold, as if he had spent a little in pure winter weather with his eyes open, letting them freeze a bit. Matter of fact, as feeling returned to his body, he felt cold all over. Not so cold that it was painful, but more of a cool uncomfortableness.
Speaking of feeling returning to his body, he felt a rather unpleasant prickling sensation throughout himself, like his entire body had fallen asleep, or if he had just returned from the cold after a long stay in the frigid winter air. He flexed his fingers, or at least tried to. His fingers were encased in a hard plastic glove, molded to fit his hand. It was the same story with the rest of his body, many straps fastened tight enough to restrict his movement, but not enough to restrict his blood flow. He tried to see more than the feet of the unknown people in front of him, as the door was open about halfway now, but the fog, or maybe steam, wafting up from his pod was masking everything else.
Oh yeah, the hissing was back too.
After another eternity of the door just slowly opening, the long-awaited event finally arrived. The door clanked to a stop, now resting somewhere on top of the cryo pod. The hissing noise also came to a stop, seeming to have been the cause of the fog as well, considering how it began to clear up with the end of the abhorrent hissing sound. The fog cleared up fully, allowing him to see a rather strange sight.
Three people in full hazmat suits were standing in front of him, one of the two in front holding an odd device that looked vaguely like a heart monitor. The one with the heart monitor stepped up to him, uttering a single word.
“Please hold still.”
Jacob naturally held still as the person wrapped a sensor on his wrist, then one on his neck. The man then pressed a few buttons on his little machine, and then watched some sort of readout on the screen that Jacob couldn’t make out from his angle. The man stayed like that for about half a minute before taking off the little sensors from his wrist and neck, and then put the device down on some sort of table that Jacob also couldn’t see due to his angle, before nodding to the man beside him.
The pair moved into action, unstrapping and unclamping him in various areas around his body, unrestricting his movement. Jacob didn’t move yet though, as once the pair were done taking off the various inhibitors, the third man in the back stepped up, as if he wanted to speak. The unnamed man grabbed the bottom of his visor, where a small lip was present. The man then used that lip to pull up the plastic covering his face, or at least the layer that was preventing Jacob from seeing his face. The man pulled it up, revealing the doctor, who’s name he still didn’t know. However, something was off about him, though Jacob couldn’t put his finger on it.
“Long time no see Jacob.” The doctor smiles disarmingly, which makes Jacob beg the question of why he would need to be disarmed.
“What do you mean, ‘Long time’? It hasn’t even been half an hour.” Jacob frowns, tilting his head questioningly, though Jacob is pretty sure he already knows the answer to his own question.
The doctor’s smile wavers, and his eyes turn downcast, avoiding Jacob’s.
“Well, ah, you see Jacob, it HAS been a long time. I imagine you just didn’t notice, due to no little input on our part.”
Suddenly, Jacob realized what was off about the doctor. When he had seen him last, the doctor had a look about him that made him seem like he could be in his early thirties or late twenties, with a little margin for error, of course.
However, The doctor now looked like he had aged around a decade, sporting a few new wrinkles that definitely weren’t there before. Instead of being a man just entering his more mature ages, he looked more like a man entering a higher, more responsible position in your standard American technical corporation. To put it shortly, he looked like he was in his forties.
“So you're saying that it's been a year already, and I was just too out of it to notice?” The doctor winced, and opened up his mouth to speak, but Jacob continued talking.
“However, I have noticed that while you said I was supposed to be in here for a year, the actual reality is different. Unless you somehow had a growth spurt, or decided that looking older was a new fashion trend, it's odd that you seem to have aged a decade in what was supposed to be a year of stasis.” Jacob tilted his head, focusing a stare on the doctor. “Tell me, doctor, how long was I out?”
The pair in front of him, having been listening this whole time, looked back at the doctor expectantly. The doctor shook his head, and attempted a smile, though the result looked more like a pained grimace. The doctor then looked up at Jacob, giving him a strange look.
“Noticed that, did you? Well, I suppose you do deserve an explanation. Let's talk about this in a more, comfortable, area.”
* * *
Jacob fixed the doctor with another bland stare for the fifteenth time in four minutes.
“So you’re telling me, that the damn CIA kidnapped me, your government organization was dissolved, and now I’m officially dead to the outside world? Not to mention I was asleep for not a year, but a decade?” Jacob said all of this with a tone that might have implied disbelief and anger.
“Well, when you put it like that, it sounds, well, exactly like what happened I suppose, but I wouldn’t put it, well, any sort of other way, so yes.” The doctor, contrary to the facade he was still bravely trying to put up, didn’t appear too comfortable with telling Jacob all of this. After all, who would want to tell an innocent, carefree, bright-eyed young boy, that his family thought him dead, and that he was asleep for a decade as well.
Jacob leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms and breathed out the air he had been holding in.
“Huh.” Jacob didn’t elaborate.
“I’m sure that this might be very alarming to you, but remember that this wasn’t in our control. I’m very sorry for your loss, but just know that we do have therapists and other people that you can talk to on hand, just let us know.” The doctor didn’t seem very proud of this series of unfortunate events happening to the aforementioned carefree child.
“Well, as long as they aren’t dead yet, I’ll be fine.” Jacob shrugs.
The doctor blinks in surprise.
“I- what? Are you sure? Your mental health is very important, and despite what our higher ups at the CIA might say, you are also important as a person.” The doctor had an increasingly worried expression on his face.
“Nah, I think I’m pretty good for now.” Jacob remained seemingly uncaring for his current status as perceived dead by his family, or for his mental health. “So, what happens to me now? I’m assuming I’m not getting executed for lack of further usefulness, or else you wouldn’t be offering me therapists, and I’m not exactly going back out into society, as that would be a rather awkward situation for the CIA. So, that leaves only one more avenue of action.” Jacob leaned forward. “I’m going back in the machine, aren’t I?”
“. . . yes.” The doctor seemed put off by Jacob’s lengthy statement.
Jacob leaned back and nodded, satisfied by his answer. “I have just one question then.”
The doctor cocked an eyebrow.
“Why am I so important? Plenty of people have brain tumors, and yet you guys aren’t kidnapping those people, right? So, what makes this one special?” Jacob tapped the side of his head.
The doctor cleared his throat, seemingly more comfortable to be conversing over a topic more familiar to him, like neuroscience.
“I can do that. Follow me.”
* * *
The doctor led Jacob to a room with only one other person inside, that person being an assistant. The lights were off, the only source of illumination being a projector shining on a blank whiteboard, the image being an x-ray of what looked like a brain.
“Well, as I’ve said before, that so-called tumor in your head isn’t exactly behaving like a tumor normally would. In the beginning, when it first appeared, it looked like any old brain tumor, forming in your cerebral cortex. It grew a bit abnormally, but nothing too out of the ordinary.” The doctor pointed at a small marble sized mass that was present inside the aforementioned section of the brain on the projection. “However, that's when things took a turn for the stranger.” The doctor motioned for the assistant to switch to the next slide, which he did.
The diagram now showed the same image as before, which Jacob now knew to be his brain, with the sole difference being that the mass had now enlarged, seemingly spreading what looked like feelers or tentacles outwards, the longest one stretching towards a middle section of the brain.
“After this happened, we were notified through plants, and we took over your medical case, observing the growth of your tumor.” The slide switched again, now showing a larger tumor. It had grown even more feelers, now numbering at five, and the longest one was now in the middle of the brain.
“The tumor had spread itself out, and the longest appendage of it had now entered what we call the anterior insular cortex, or, “ The doctor looked at Jacob. “the empathy center.”
Jacob stared back at the doctor, not showing any outward form of reaction. The doctor looked back towards the projection, clearing his throat.
“Ahem, anyway. As you can probably guess, this was highly irregular behavior from what was supposed to be a simple tumor. And what we realized next was even more shocking.” The assistant clicked to the next slide, this one showing . . . nothing.
Actually, it did show something, Jacob just didn’t notice at first. The tumor was now not a simple mass, but instead had somehow become, fainter, he supposed. It didn’t have any clear separation from his brain, instead, only sections could be made out from the former tumor. It seemed like it had merged with his brain, which wasn’t exactly comforting to Jacob.
“The tumor now couldn’t be described as a simple tumor. We had to deduce that it had somehow become part of your brain, as we couldn’t find any clear definition of where the tumor began and where it ended. We could still technically see the tumor, though it was like it had faded its edges in with your brain, merging with it.” The assistant shut off the projector, and turned the lights back on.
The doctor turned back towards Jacob, with what looked to be a sympathetic expression on his face.
“Now I hope you understand why we want to know what the hell this thing is. If this was some sort of parasite, and if it could spread . . “ The doctor let Jacob figure out the rest on his own.
“Huh, yeah. I wouldn’t really want the world to turn into a reenactment of a certain hit TV adaptation of a certain hit zombie game.” Jacob nodded. “So, how are you gonna go about solving, “ Jacob gestured haphazardly to his head. “This?”
“We . . . aren’t sure yet.” The doctor grimaced. “However, it has only been, well, it's been quite awhile, but we learned a lot from the first go around. We are hoping to gain more data from the next decade, with some new technologies to be used.”
Jacob nodded his head, looking around. “So do I just go back in now?”
“No, actually. The planned procedure is to keep you awake for a minimum of twelve hours, with us taking several tests to determine if any changes have been made to your mental or intellectual state. And also, you are going to have to visit some therapists, that's non-optional.” The doctor replied.
Jacob only grunted in response to that last statement.
* * *
Jacob is running on a treadmill, with several devices measuring his various functions.
“Just let us know when you’re getting tired.” The man, Dr. Markus Vasquez by his nametag, repeated for the fifth time.
“And that would be right around now, actually.” Jacob stopped running when Dr. Vasquez pressed the off button.
“Hmm, alright. You’re operating at standard rates for a boy of your age.” Dr. Vasquez writes down notes on his clipboard, probably about him. Or maybe some sort of weird fan fiction about some US president, you never know.
Dr. Vasquez motioned for Jacob to follow him, which Jacob does.
“And that should conclude your physical testing regimen for today.” Dr. Vasquez leads Jacob into a square room about six feet wide, with a couch, a chair, two tables, a bookshelf, and a TV on the wall opposite from the couch.
Then, another doctor walks into the room, holding a clipboard and a sheet of papers. Dr. Vasquez and the new doctor share a few silent words, ones that Jacob can’t make out, before Dr. Vasquez walks out of the room. The new doctor, a Dr. Sophia Vasel by her nametag, sits down on the chair next to the couch.
“Hey again Jacob. I’m here to-” Dr. Vasel begins, but Jacob cuts her off.
“Oh wait, aren’t you one of the people who strapped me in that pod a decade ago?” Jacob tilts his head questioningly.
Dr. Vasel blinks. “Erm, yes. Anyway, I’m just here to give you a couple tests, alright? Just standard procedure.” Dr. Vasel flips through her clipboard. “Here is the first one.”
Jacob started again. “No signing any forms or asking for consent or anything?”
Dr. Vasel hid her apparent frustration admirably. “Uh, no. Our policy doesn’t require us to do that. Anyway, if we could get on with the test?” Dr. Vasel pulled out a pen. “Just some questions for the first one.”
* * *
Jacob was a bit bored.
Actually, that was an understatement. He was VERY bored. There, a much more apt statement.
After a large amount of rigorous testing, physical, mental, biological, the whole shebang, they had basically left him in the small room and told him to entertain himself for the remaining eight hours, twenty-seven minutes, and five seconds. After that, he would be going back into cryosleep. They gave him access to a good amount of literature from his time, as well as giving him a rather generous library of online media, also from his time. However, they had severely underestimated his preferences, as the majority of the online material consisted of children for the age of ten, and all the good books he had already read several times over.
So yes, he was quite bored. So bored, in fact, that even pacing around and thinking couldn’t sate his hunger for entertainment, as the intense migraine he had prevented him from running any sort of complicated scenario that could even mildly entertain him. So, he was forced to turn to his old friend.
A decade ought to have yielded a good amount of entertaining historical fruit, especially when you consider the rather hot pot that was world politics at the time of the beginning of his short nap. So, he had requested a book that recapped everything important that had happened in the last ten years. And how interesting it was.
Standing out the most in terms of the global stage, the American intervention in the Russo-Ukrainian war, pushing the Russians not just out of Ukraine, but also reclaiming Crimea for the Ukrainians as well. This had happened due to Russia repeatedly threatening to use nuclear weapons in the war, and so America finally had to intervene, managing to push them out of Ukraine in just two and a half months. And it seems Russia was bluffing, as no nukes were ever launched.
However, war wasn’t the only highlight of the last decade, as a miniature space race actually occurred not between the East and the West, but SpaceX and NASA were both racing for the clout and money that being the first to have a human land on Mars would be. It ended up with a SpaceX victory, and not a small amount of a budget increase.
Nanotechnology had also progressed, yet not as much as other avenues, as it's mostly been used for small-scale construction supposedly. Congress was being quite strict on the Supreme Court’s ruling. However, some small advancements had been made in the effectiveness and build of a standard nanobot, making them considerably cheaper and easier to make. However, the availability of nanobots was mostly limited to either private firms or large corporations willing to invest in the product.
As entertaining as history was, it wasn’t enough to sustain him for more than an hour, so he resigned himself to sitting, standing, pacing, and occasionally watching kids cartoons for the rest of his time. He wasn’t going to ask for his benefactors to obtain some new content for him to watch, not because they couldn’t, no, they likely could do anything, but because his pride would be too injured if he did. Yes, a truly brilliant mind we have here.
* * *
“This feels familiar.” Jacob mused, his words certainly pertaining to the scenario that he was currently in.
Dr. Vasel and another doctor were strapping him in, securing his hands and feet in molded plastic to restrict movement, and straps to secure his arms and legs. This time, a little hat with a dozen blinking electrodes was added to his menagerie of devices. They had also given him a fresh edition of nanobots, these ones supposedly more efficient by two percent. Yes, such a great increase. However, they also fed off the energy his own body produced, so that theoretically gave them an infinite life, as long as he was alive.
The doctors finished up strapping him into the machine, giving him a final once over to make sure nothing bad happens again. They stepped back, and began to run diagnostics on their computers to make sure everything electronic was in order as well.
Jacob sighed. He had a feeling that this set of actions would become an agonizingly long procedure.
After a very long fifteen minutes, the unnamed doctor, who had come down during the diagnostics, nodded to an assistant, and he began pressing buttons. The machine clicked and hissed, and the door came down, blissfully quicker this time. After just thirty seconds, the door sealed shut, and Jacob saw the doctor through the plastic. The doctor walked out of sight, as the foggy plastic couldn’t see that far, though the doctor clearly went somewhere where he could talk to Jacob, as he heard the doctor’s voice over what sounded like an intercom inside the pod.
“You can hear me, right Jacob?” The doctor asked.
“Uh, yep.” Jacob replied.
“Very good. As there isn’t anything else we have to do on our end, we’ll be sending you off right about now. Any questions before you’re frozen?” The doctor inquired.
“None that I can recall.” Jacob said.
“Then we’ll see you again in ten years.” The doctor said.
The intercom shut off with a crackle, and the hissing noise came back, probably meaning he was gonna fall asleep any time now. He wondered what the world would look like in another decade, bu-
Oh wait, he did have a question. What WAS the doctor’s nam-
Part Two is gonna come, maybe in a day. I've already finished it, but the first part will serve to as a way to observe this communities reactions to this little thing, and see if I should post another. I expect about ten to twenty chapters, with hopefully not all of them being as long as this one, so yeah, hope y'all like this.
submitted by Omansurver
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2023.03.28 22:33 Hambis1901 Sherpa Group Ready To Help ANYONE With ALL Raids! [All Platforms]
A little introduction: Hey there! My name is Hambis1901 and I have been teaching raids and helping people complete them for around 5 years now! I am from the UK and with the addition of crossplay, I can play with any platform. With the number of sherpas I have completed, I managed to get above the top 450 sherpas in the entire world. This is an achievement I am very proud of and I am still willing to help many more people. I have a group of around 4 different sherpas, all with the express purpose of helping YOU! We are looking to help as many people as we can in completing the raids they have not yet tried.
What do I do to get a sherpa? To get a sherpa, you will need to friend request me on discord! I would suggest making a comment below to show your interest, then you can move over to Discord after you send me a friend request :) My discord is Hambis1901#8030. Send me a friend request and I will reply as soon as possible! Over on discord, I can help organise a raid sherpa for you.
Does this actually work? Yes! So far I have personally sherpa'd over 650 guardians complete raids they have never even attempted before and helped over 1800 people get their first completions too. This number is no exaggeration, our sherpa group has been continuously helping people for over two years.
Extra Information: Our sherpas are from all around the world, so time zones won't be an issue! We will always have an experienced player ready to pair up with you. You also have the ability to schedule your own sherpa raids around YOU, that way, experienced players can join on your availability. As interest is high, getting a sherpa may take some time. But if you are patient, then you will get the help you deserve.
Final Notices: The most important thing if you want a sherpa is to send me a friend request on discord! To add me, send a friend request to Hambis1901#8030! Don't be shy, this is for you and if you are interested in getting your first-ever raid completion, contact me!
submitted by Hambis1901
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2023.03.28 22:27 Jcb112 Humans Don't Hibernate [Part 39/?]
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We proceeded at a reasonable pace back towards the planet, making sure that we maintained our course using conventional, STL engines so as to limit any emissions that might’ve given our very presence in this system away to any prying eyes.
With hours until we were able to resume our operations, we began reviewing what was in effect our refurbished ship; repairs done courtesy of the system’s rich mineral deposits.
“As requested, let’s do a full rundown.” Vir began, his voice much cheerier than before, as evidenced by the near-permanent smile now plastered upon his monitor-like face. “When we started off, we began with three spinal canons completely out for the count. A Mark VII Kinetic Accelerator, a Mark V Plasma Lance Half-Canon, and a Mark IX Laser Focusing Array. The latter was operating at a reduced operational capacity, but you know as well as I, reduced operational capacity
when it comes to laser weapons might as well be as good as reducing it from a fully fledged weapon to a glorified oversized point defense emplacement. Given the challenge in constructing the components needed to address the more fundamental issues in the laser focusing array, we can more or less consider that a write-off. At least until I have more time to figure out a more comprehensive fix. As it stands, we have our big boy back… the Mark VII Kinetic Accelerator, which is more than sufficient to fend off most ships in my book.” The AI began cackling with glee. “Oh, and that’s not the end of it. You see, back then, hot-swapping and modularity was all the craze. So the chamber for the kinetic accelerator is the same one that we’re using for the plasma lance half-canon. They’re literally the same barrel, as the kinetic accelerator uses a magnetized tube to accelerate ferrous slugs, so too does the plasma lance need a magnetized tube to focus superheated plasma in a concentrated ‘beam’ of plasma. Anyways, long story short, that’s why it’s classified as a half-lance. Because we’re using the same barrel, it's inherently more limited in range compared to its bigger full ‘lance’ brother. Anyways, we have both operating at full capacity now, so that’s great!”
It was at this point that something unexpected happened. The smile on Vir’s monitor-face that had always been more or less a simplified facsimile of a human’s grin sans the teeth, had evolved. Two fangs were now visible at the top right and left edges of the AI’s mouth, changing that gleeful grin into something far more predatory. It was clear though why the AI had chosen to go down this path, as perhaps this alluded to the ship’s main weapon systems being brought back to operational status.
“That’s erm, that’s a new look Vir.” I managed out awkwardly. I still hadn’t gotten used to that human expression, the smile
. And despite how artificial Vir’s expressions were in comparison to the real deal, it still harkens back to my memories of those first encounters with Elijah. Humanity, and that predatory zeal, seemed to have carried over exceedingly well to their digital offspring.
“Thanks! This is actually something more akin to my original look
back in the day, I now feel ready to just chomp
on anything that comes near me. Heck, if I could add claws
to this platform, I would.” The AI chirped back with the excitability of a recently adopted pup. Though I couldn’t blame him, given the state of the ship just a week ago before repairs.
“Alright so, the Saturn VII anti-ship missile batteries have also been repaired. When we started out we had 27 missiles out of 150 still working. We exhausted all of them during that first battle, leaving us with 123 duds. Fifty of those were aged beyond repair, so I scrapped those and cannibalized them for parts. The remaining 73 needed minor repairs to the circuitry, fuel intake, what have you, and they’ve all been repaired. I managed to make another 17, however, bringing the missile count to 90.” The AI continued without fail, his fanged grin still very much apparent. “And finally, the Mars V Secondary Kinetic Batteries that really helped us in the first battle, have all been repaired. All ten of them, back to near optimal capacity. I’ve also replenished our munitions for these bad boys, we’re sitting at about 4,500 rounds, so that should be good enough for a while. Though I’d be more comfortable with 10,000, if not the max capacity of 25,000. But hey, I didn’t want to be caught off guard if I extended the repair schedule even more.” The AI explained, before letting out a long sigh as if to highlight just how exhausted he was from rattling on about our armaments.
Though it was a welcome feeling to be quite honest.
To finally have a ship functioning with all systems as close to optimal as possible.
Beyond that, it was impressive that all of this was done with just field
We spent the rest of those hours discussing the finer details of our plans, as we landed on a two pronged attack that would see us primarily situated on the bridge as our drones did most of the work yet again.
That was just the nature of modern operations after all, the present was, for lack of a better descriptor, simply more disappointing than science fiction in quite a few aspects. Indeed, when the topic of science fiction and its futurist expectations was brought up, the image of the intrepid explorer with bridge crews making their ways down into entirely hostile or unsurveyed territory seemed to have been something of a common trope, even in human media.
The truth of space exploration and modern military operations however, couldn’t be further from the truth.
If electronic battlefield systems could be actively maintained and cyber superiority could be established and enforced, and if there were no finer details of consideration to be made that explicitly called for boots on the ground, then drones were almost always the go-to choice for conducting frontline operations.
As a result, our two-pronged attack would be conducted primarily by the same drones that had been responsible for the first
lunar exploration survey. Now optimized with repairs, and with an additional 40 more units added to their ranks, two fronts would be opened. One returning to the confines of the Interloper’s lair, and the other down on the planet below.
Managing both operations simultaneously would’ve proven to be a challenging undertaking, but one that was well within the AI’s capabilities. For what effectively boiled down to a two-man operation, manpower and administrative capacity wasn’t actually
the limiting factor in this equation. Indeed that assertion couldn’t be further from the truth. For the moment an AI was added to the mix, all former conventions regarding the principles and expectations of manpower became as relevant as castle’s walls would to artillery and aircraft. The presence of a powerful AI like Vir was more than sufficient for the task at hand. Indeed, as certain memories were unlocked by satellite’s records, it was later revealed to me by the AI himself that his responsibilities had at one point reached far beyond the confines of a single ship. Indeed, he’d actually commanded entire flotillas
of ships at his height. Squadrons of varying tonnages ranging from compact bombers to battlecruisers of dizzying tonnages were at one point all but fair game to him, placed under his responsibility by the ever expanding machine that was the human military industrial complex, where automation was quickly becoming the name of the game as humanity was simply producing too many ships for individual humans to actually crew.
It was terrifying to imagine the sheer scale of human industry at that point in time, indeed, if their current iterations were anything to go by… that scale was more than likely only poised to increase
Whatever the case may be, it was clear that Vir’s ‘comfort zone’ as it were, was always with intraship operations rather than squadron-scale battlespace management. This particular operation however, would warrant a brief return to the AI’s storied past. Indeed, it would actually veer from the written record, and head further into territory previously uncharted.
For the present demanded that Vir's responsibilities extend towards operations far beyond mere combat and battlefield management, moving into territory that would expand on the breadth of his duties. Tasks that were perhaps once relegated to some other specialized AI, now found themselves within Vir’s prerogative.
One of these tasks being terrestrial operations.
“I’ve always hated planets.” Vir spoke, interrupting the long line of discussions that had, up to this point, been all but devoted to the finalization of the details regarding the two concurrent sorties.
“You know the drones are sort of an extension of myself, at least, up to a point. They have their own independent subroutines. Analogous to sending out bloodhounds ahead of the hunting party. However, whenever I uplink to them, I can see
felt. To be stuck
inside of a cavern? That’s one thing. I can sort of rationalize it as being within the confines of a particularly unfamiliar ship or station. But to actually be underneath
a sky? To realize that everything above you is a prison? Lysara, that’s fucking distressing.” The AI explained with a great degree of animated exaggerations, something that I’ve noticed was very much an integral part of his personality. This hyperactive state of overexcitability, I’ve started to realize, was Vir’s baseline. Anything outside of that seemed to be an anomaly rather than the norm. “I can’t believe some organics can feel free
living underneath a sky.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, when I see the sky, I see a prison, a tomb. I feel as if I’m limbless, flightless, unable to reach beyond it. I don’t know, but to me, space is my home. To have infinite degrees of freedom with which to move, to maneuver, to fly? Unrestrained by gravity, save for the gravity exerted upon you by local stellar bodies? That’s the norm for me. To be on a planet, to be pulled and stuck to its surface like an animal trapped on sticky paper
? I don’t know, it just feels restricting. Again, looking up from a planet without seeing the stars, it feels like someone’s shackled you to a prison, and is actively teasing
you with the freedom you can never have as a planet-bound body. ESPECIALLY during the day! The day, where the light from the sun is all but diffused into an atmosphere? It feels as if someone has put just
enough effort in blindfolding you, but not enough, as you can still see
the star, a single one sure, but diffused throughout the skies. It’s… I don’t know Lysara, are you following?” The AI had gone through almost every possible wild gesture capable of being expressed by his platform. At this point, I think it was clear what point the AI was trying to make as I nodded a few times in quiet affirmation.
“I think I understand Vir. The vacuum of space is your natural habitat in a sense, to be able to move, to travel, to jump from point to point, that’s your norm. To be stuck on a small rock would definitely be outside your comfort zone.” I surmised.
“Yes! Thank you! You get it!” The AI grinned back at me, once more, with those toothy fangs that now lined its ‘mouth’.
It was after that exchange that we put our plans into motion. As the drones began descending both towards the planet and the lunar facility at the same time.
The mission down planetside would actually begin above and within the atmosphere, as a careful telemetry and surface scanning operation would commence around the areas where the signal was strongest.
This would take some time.
However, the mission deep within the lunar facility would, in its own way, take up more time than we had initially assumed as we would quickly come to find out.
Entering the Interloper’s chambers, we saw that nothing much had changed. Indeed, we saw our nuclear deterrence still sitting idly by near the entrance of the facility proper.
This brought a strange sense of comfort to my heart that was difficult to really describe.
Regardless, we quickly began the process of assembling the various parts of the neural accelerators onto the interloper, making sure that every component had sufficient air gapping between each component and subsystem, all in an attempt to minimize the potential security risks inherent to the operation.
It took about an hour for the entire setup to be completed, at which point, Vir turned towards me, and with a cock of his head gestured towards the console in front of me.
“Would you like me to start the process, or would you like to do the honors, Lysara?” The AI asked, clearly understanding my reluctance and apprehension on dealing with the Interloper, but in giving me this choice, had clearly had his own idea of helping me through this difficult state of mind. In giving me this choice, this level of control… the AI was in effect handing me the keys to be in charge for once. To be in control of a creature, a being that had in effect been in control of my
life up to this point.
This newfound sense of autonomy was unprecedented. Indeed, it felt like something else had been unlocked inside of me as I held my hand on the physical keys that now held the chains of this beast.
I was, for the first time in my life, in control.
And it was with this control that my caution once more returned, as my level headed nature coalesced with my newfound risk taking proclivities to merge into something new, something else.
“I’ll start it.” I announced with firm assurance. My face colored not with a grin of revenge, but a determined, confident, smile.
Without a single nod of warning, and a few knowing glances, I pushed the button.
To awaken the beast. First Previous
(Author’s Note: The button has been pressed! I hope you guys enjoy! :D The next chapter is already out on Patreon as well if you want to check it out!
[If you guys want to help support me and these stories, here's my ko-fi
! And my Patreon
for early chapter releases (Chapter 40 of this story is already out on there!)]
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2023.03.28 22:26 jazzym22 Please critique my destination wedding guest schedule! Would you have fun at this wedding?
Hi! Looking for thoughts and advice on this guest schedule. We’re having a destination wedding in Italy. Ceremony will be in a church about 30-40 minutes from the reception venue (which is where everyone will be staying as well - we’re paying for 2 nights for all of our guests). Trying to minimize the Catholic gap and keep people from being too bored or too overwhelmed. Any advice welcome!
- 4:00 pm: everyone arrives at the venue via shuttle & checks into their rooms. Crackers, cheese, olive oil, biscotti, and wine will be in each room.
- 7:00 pm: bus arrives to take everyone to rehearsal dinner at a local restaurant
- 10:00 pm: bus takes everyone back to the venue.
- 8:30 - 10: breakfast is provided at the venue
- 10:00-1:30: guests get ready. They can order room service or go to the local town for food if needed.
- 1:30: bus arrives to take everyone to the church
- 2:30-3:30: wedding mass
- 3:30-4:30: guests hang out in the main square or explore the city, take pics, get gelato or coffee or a cocktail, etc.
- 4:30: bus takes everyone back to the venue
- 5:00: guests arrive at venue for the cocktail hour & appetizers
- 6:15: grand entrance, first dance
- 6:30: dinner, speeches
- 8:00: party begins (music, Photo Booth, and gelato cart)
- 8:30: cake
- 10:00: late night snack (pizza)
- 1:00: music ends
- 8:30-10: breakfast is provided, everyone checks out and is transported back to the main city via shuttle
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2023.03.28 22:01 ChrisSmall15 CAN bus network help
Hello people, I'm trying to get my head around CAN bus networks so I just have a few questions if you don't mind
- Is CAN the language used for this network?
- For the Cyclic Redundency Check is the polynomial expression used to check the same across all the nodes on the network?
- Are the End of frame bits unique to the particular node on the network or are they randomly generated each time with each message?
- What's the key differences between remote and data frames?
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2023.03.28 21:45 Mr_Zonca Software Updates fail to download - 0% progress
Hey, so I LOVE SCCM, but lately I have been banging my head on trying to setup software updates. I followed a great guide for setting up a baseline group and adr's to run monthly. When I deploy the software group to my test VM it attempts to install 3 updates, but only 1 actually installs and the other two fail at 0%. I have researched this issue for far to long and I really am at a loss for what to do next.
I think the boundary group is fine because it installs one of the updates (also the SCCM console lists that machine as having a boundary group associated to it). I have attached a piece of log where it shows the failures. I have traced these into the IIS logs and found it also complains of a error 400 or 401. I even remade my software update group fully to see if that would change anything.
I can get other logs or provide other information if requested. I am open to just about anything, even if you just have ideas of things to try. We do not have a CMG, its all on prem CB and this initial test is isolated to the Primary server which also has a DP. WSUS as well as the databases for both are also all on the same machine.
Merged Logs for failed Updates
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