I don't have any friends to have a bridal shower, simply put.
I spent years battling a mental illness which made me lose all my friends.
I am now a very shy person with literally 0 friends. I don't have a best friend even, nobody to talk to and I'm an only child.
I am friends with my partner's friends, but only one of them has a girlfriend and we are still getting to know each other.
I feel so alone and I don't know what I'm gonna say when my partner's friends ask if I'm gonna have a bridal shower.
I honestly want to cry. I'm dreading the day my partner has his bachelors because I will be so miserable. I'm happy he has friends, but I can't help but feel like I wish I had the same you know.
I binged all day because of this and I massacred my face yet I still feel as bad. Thankfully my wedding is still a few months away.
How can I deal with this? I know it shouldn't be a big deal but loneliness is scary and I am so tied of it.

Getting rid of a bunch of stuff I don't use anymore. Everything is in great condition unless otherwise noted. Pickup in South Austin near I35/Riverside. PICS
Mayflash F500 Elite: Great fight stick, have both the 4 way and 8 way gates (8 way currently installed.) Elite version has Sanwa buttons/joystick. Custom art installed (Tokyo Ghoul pic). Very lightly used for shmups. $100
Logitech M510 wireless mouse: Bought this for a home theater setup but ended up not using it. BNIB. $15
Xbox Core controller: Lightly used for some racing games after I sold my sim setup. Has spent most of its life sitting in a box in my closet. $30
PCKT 2 vape with magnetic adapter: "Purple haze" color, works great just haven't used it in forever. USB-C charging port. Slight wear on the back side from rubbing in my pocket. $40
HP Omen Mindframe Prime headset: Decent headset with cooling ear cups and customizable RGB edge lighting. Felt like the cooling cups actually did a decent job keeping my ears from getting too warm during long gaming sessions. I'd estimate a couple hundred hours of use. $50
Nuphy F1 wireless mechanical keyboard: Decent little keyboard. It's designed for mac but works fine on PC. Low profile brown switches with limited edition keycap set. Customizable RGB lighting. Folding case for setting your phone or tablet on. $100
HP Reverb G2 VR: Refurb unit, works great, looks new. V1 all around (never could get my hands on a V2 cable). Can be finnicky finding a USB port that works properly but once you find one it seems to not have any issues. I used this on multiple motherboards with AMD CPUs and was always able to find at least one port that worked as it should but you probably will have to play around with it to find one that works. One setup a front panel USB port was the answer, on another it was on the back panel. IDK what the deal is, but like I said, once I found a good port, no issues. Comes with aftermarket head gasket and a cable pulley kit to keep the cord off the ground. Controller tracking isn't the best but the head tracking is great if you're looking for racing/flying sim usage. $100
Thrustmaster T16000 joystick and TWCS throttle: Joystick has the yaw issue pretty bad so I'm just throwing this in with the throttle in case someone wants to take the time to fix it (I can point you in the direction to permanently fix with a magnetic hall effect sensor, I just don't care enough to fix it myself). Throttle is modded with 3d printed slider and bearings. Slides super easily now, so much better than the stock slider. $80

Disclaimer - What I'm about to share are my thoughts based on my own experiences from the past. I'm posting here to seek counter-opinions or reflections from those who may agree fully or partially. The purpose is for me to expand my own perspective on this, while also potentially enriching others' views on the matter.
So I've had a few unsuccessful relationships in the past, especially of late, where there was one particular pattern that made the relationship unsustainable in the long-term, despite the best intentions of both parties. That is asymmetry of one kind or another. Let me explain.
When I use the word "asymmetry" I am speaking very broadly about a range of phenomena. It could be something as fundamental as asymmetry in traits, or benign as asymmetry in interest, or something as frustrating as asymmetry in effort invested, or as potentially dangerous as asymmetry in ethics/values, power, standards, treatment or accountability. I'm sure there are more dimensions in which it is possible to observe asymmetry.
I'm listing some examples of asymmetry for clarity as to what I'm talking about:-

1. Asymmetry in intelligence/maturity. One person being very intelligent or mature and the other person just not being there. Let's say they find each other very attractive for some reason. Despite that overwhelming attraction, this is eventually going to lead to frustrations in the long run. The mature person is going to feel not seen/heard and alone in that relationship and the not so mature person is going to either feel poor self-esteem in comparison or unable to relate to their more mature partner or feel like they're being dragged forward at a pace that is not comfortable for them.
2. Asymmetry in effort. Anyone who puts an inordinate amount of effort into the relationship with someone who doesn't reciprocate is going to suffer eventually, even if initially they're happy to be that way. And the other person is going to grow dependent on the disproportionate efforts of their effortful partner. This isn't healthy for either of them.
3. Asymmetry in ethics/values. Let's say one person is very good-hearted and empathetic and vicariously suffers at the sight of others suffering, they're not going to be able to enjoy the company of someone who values profit over ethics, regardless of how accepting they are. Their consensus over decision-making will suffer immensely.
4. Asymmetry in powecontrol in the relationship. This is a relatively well-established red flag. One person makes all the decisions, and the other person doesn't get to even protest, let alone participate in the decision-making. Theoretically, if the follower was to have an inordinate amount of trust upon the leader in the relationship; and if the leader were to have inordinate amount of self-control and love towards their follower in the relationship, they could live harmoniously, just as a healthy parent and child can live harmoniously in a relationship that is asymmetrical in the dimension of powecontrol. But in the context of a romantic relationship, where mutual understanding and independence are valued, this can lead to the partners missing out on fundamental joys of a more symmetrical relationship.
5. Asymmetry in treatment. This forays into the realm of outright toxic relationships. Let's say partner A is always kind and respectful to partner B even when they falter and is always happy to calmly explain the mistakes to partner B. And partner A is also happy to reflect on their own mistakes and change their ways. But let's say partner B simply explodes in anger at the slightest mistake made by partner A. And the prospect of partner A pointing out the mistakes of partner B would lead to more harm to partner A than simply letting it slide. This can lead to an abuser-abusee kind of a relationship in no time.

I'm sure there are more examples for what I'm talking about (asymmetry in sexual drive, lifestyle, mental health, past trauma etc), but this should suffice in bringing clarity about what I'm talking about.
In my observation there is no such thing as a relationship between two well-intentioned individuals where only one person suffers. If one partner suffers for whatever reason, the other partner is going to suffer for different reasons. You either suffer together or rejoice together. Even if it is an abusive relationship, where it may seem that the abuser is depleting the abusee for personal pleasure, the abusee merely staying in that relationship allows the abuser to grow deeper in their toxic tendencies with immunity. And someone being toxic towards others is always a consequence of their toxicity consuming them first and overflowing onto others. They temporarily rejoice at the presence of someone else to abuse only because they don't have to suffer their toxicity alone.
But even as I'm writing about the effect of asymmetry in long-term sustainable relationships, I am skeptical of a simplistic conclusion. As with anything, there are exceptions. There are individuals in long-term relationships with significant age gap where there is a natural asymmetry in maturity and lived experience. There are individuals in long-term sustainable relationships where one partner is significantly wealthier and savvy with money and the other person isn't. Perhaps the asymmetry could be disproportionate, as I've indicated in the title. But it could still be healthy because there may be another dimension in which the relationship is symmetric that somehow counterbalances the other asymmetry. For example, let's combine the two asymmetries I've pointed to as the exception here - a lonely old man with a lot of wealth and no one to share it all with falls in love with a very young woman who is struggling to pay her bills. There is clearly asymmetry in experience and wealth, but it need not lead to asymmetry in treatment or maturity. Someone young could be just as self-aware and mature as someone much older. And perhaps the young woman appreciates the benefits of being with this wealthy man so much that she shows all her affection, gratitude through how well she takes care of him and the old man cherishes her company so much that he showers her with gifts and experiences that she could never even imagine having by herself. So it could turn into a symbiotic relationship where the asymmetry could lead to phenomenal benefits for either partner.
So perhaps there is a pattern to the healthy exceptions of the trend I initially observed regarding the effect of asymmetry. Maybe the key is to have symmetry across some fundamental dimensions, like values, treatment and maturity and the rest will be sorted to benefit both. I don't know. I don't have all the answers. Hence this post. What are your thoughts?

Today was my baby shower for my baby girl (first baby for both my partner and I, and the first grandchild on both sides. First baby all around in a while.)
We don’t have much money so we threw the shower at my moms house, and I cooked all the food myself and made all the decorations, invitations and games myself. My mother helped pay for the ingredients and supplies.
Well, after weeks of prepping and excitement over welcoming our daughter into this world, only 6 people showed up. This includes my parents who live in the house it was thrown at. We had over 25 people rsvp and tell us they were coming, and either sent a text this morning saying they couldn’t come, or just not show up.
Im just very sad at the turn out and Im feeling very, very lonely. We put a lot of work into this and I really thought more people would want to celebrate her with us. At least our families. I cried for almost an hour.
That’s all, sorry for the rant. I’ll take this down in a few minutes. I just needed to tell someone.

1 day pre-op
Early morning It is raining cats and dogs. I wake my husband up to take me to the airport. I arrive in Madrid and now I have a few hours to kill before I can check into my airbnb. I eat half a chicken pita and coffee before 13:00, since I need to fast for 6 hours before my consultation and tests.
Afternoon I check into the airbnb - it’s COLD. I message the host about the heating and apparently it comes on later.
Evening I am at the hospital and they send me from one place to the other and finally I get to the right place. Consultation, blood tests etc. A lot of waiting. I am STARVING.
Late Evening After everything I scuff down the apple and half pita that I had left in my handbag. Tired, I return to the airbnb and it’s freezing. Try to take a shower and the water is cold. Can’t recover from a surgery here.
Operation day
06:30 I wake up and can’t feel my feet. Too late for breakfast. I just eat an apple and gulp down copious amounts of water.
07:00 Fast starts. I get ready, book a hotel and call airbnb. The customer service is amazing and they give me a full refund.
11:00 Hotel let’s me check in early after I explain that I will not be able to check in after surgery. I buy some liquids and lay out towels, pajamas etc. The bed is really comfy and the room is nice (and warm).
13:00 I am at the hospital, someone misplaced me for an hour. We go through the final steps. It goes fast. At around 15:00 I am in the surgery room.
?? I remember waking up in the ICU/recovery room and later in the private room. The doctor and anesthesiologist sit with me in my room and slowly help me get dressed after she takes out the catheter. She combs my hair because there is a lot of blood in it. I get sick twice. It’s around 01:30 and I had no idea it was this late. I message a quick “am ok” to my husband and mom, eventhough I don’t feel okay at all. I feel in disbelief that I am being discharged now. My hip is THROBBING and it is impossible to put weight on my right leg. A taxi picks me up for the 600m to the hotel and he stops at the pharmacy to pick up medicine for me. I tip him well because he had to help me get out of the car and into the hotel room. He also stopped because I got sick again.
The rest of the night is not friendly to me. I needed to wee so I got up from the bed, but all I remember is when I woke up I was moaning on the floor, totally blacked out, meaning I had fell hard. I think I just napped on the floor after that and in some miraculous way got back to the bed eventually.
1 day post op
09:00 Next morning and I am doing a bit better, I hear my heartbeat in my ears the whole time. I am in and out of sleep and listening to my book. Getting out of bed is a massive struggle and pain due to the hip bone graft. I sip on protein shakes and juice. Eventually I ask the doctor about the noise in my ears. She comes by to the hotel and takes my vitals, she says everything is fine under the circumstances, my blood pressure will pick up again then I will feel better again, because I lost a lot of blood when they did the bone grafting.
Rest of the day is a blur. Called the airline to ask for assistance because I can’t even walk 10 feet without feeling like passing out. The lady was so patient because I can barely talk. I muster the energy to wash my hair over the tub, because I don’t think they let people fly that can’t walk, talk well and with blood in their hair. Pink water everywhere, I slump into the bed exhausted wet hair and all.
2 days post op
7:00 I get up and take 45 min to get ready and pack, I only came with a backpack. I almost didn’t need anything as I was just sleeping most of the time. I am glad I packed my own towel to sleep on because there was blood and the hotel linens are white. The trip back feels like a mountain in front of me.
I am astounded that the operation coordinator said I should be able to fly home today, because I feel like death warmed up. It was probably when she thought I was still coming with someone.
Once at the airport I take about 20 mins to find the assistance booth and almost cry from relief when I get there. From there on they make sure I get where I need to be. On the flight I get a few looks because I guess I don’t really look sick, especially with a mask on that covers most of the swelling and bruising. I puke twice into a barf bag. The flight was very empty. My head is ON FIRE.
I didn’t think there would be assistance at the arrival airport because I’m not even sure what I booked, but thank goodness as I’m limping out of the plane a wheelchair appears and the man behind it asks me “Ms X?”. I almost cry again which is weird because I haven’t been this emotional in a long time. Husband is waiting for me at arrivals.
Finally at home and I am relieved and very very exhausted. I just sleep from here on out. Some time during the night I wake up and take a shower. I sleep with a cold cloth on my forehead, because this headache is out of this world.
As a side note: My husband is freaked out. He says I look like another person. I know he isn’t trying to upset me but he looks horrified. I’m not sure how to deal with this so I try to let it go. I look like 100 bees stung my face. At least my phone recognizes me.
3 days post op
I wake up at 6 with master headache. Somewhere during the night I moved to the couch to sleep upright and to ice my head with icewater and cloths. Maxxed out on prescription meds. I don’t want to over medicate but I can’t deal with this so my husband takes me to the hospital. I ask them to please just get rid of the headache but they insist on a CT because I passed out on the floor 2 nights ago. They put me on a pain drip which doesn’t work, make me wait 1.5 hours for a CT in a very bright waiting room (could have been worse). Afterwards the doc says he doesn’t want to put me on another drip, he just gives me medication to drink. Not happy with this as the pain is at the same level as when I arrived, and at this stage even keeping liquids down is difficult. At least my brain is okay according to the CT. When we return home I continue to ice my head and I just try to sleep. I have the weirdest scariest dreams.
4 days post op
The headache continues throughout today, with ups and downs. It is more bearable than the previous day. We have the most uneventful Christmas and finally in the evening we watch a Christmas movie together. We eat a very soft spaghetti bolognaise. Chewing is a mission and I need to clean my mouth every hour, doctor’s orders. Yesterday was the first day I ate solid food and I think that helped a lot with the dizziness. (Different doctors have different guidelines, mine’s were soft foods like pasta, risotto, liquids, white fish, eggs etc.)
5 days post op
Horrible night and the headache is back with a vengeance at 06:00. I take more medicine and fall asleep again. When I wake up again at 10:30 I am desperate. I read up all the ways to get rid of headaches. I put on my warm robe and boots, and I put a cold, wet cloth around my neck and sit on the balcony. It’s -2c so the fresh air hits hard and keeps the cloth cold. I drink a cup of coffee with a straw and the maximum combined allowed dose of pain meds. 30 mins later and pure bliss as the headache has gone. Then all of a sudden I feel good. I am actually a little worried to be feeling this normal all of a sudden.
19:00 Note since this morning: everything is in check and haven’t had pain meds since this morning. I feel like a whole different person. My prayers have been answered. I was able to shower, wash my hair again, cook dinner (in slow motion), make the bed etc. But still very careful not to exert myself.
I mustered up the courage to take off the plaster from my hip. It is VERY bruised. The cut is long and thin, I think I will be able to make it disappear with some tlc once it is completely healed. I wasn’t expecting it to be this long.
Day 5 Notes:
Cleaning teeth is a mission and the first 3 days I was just rinsing my mouth with water every 3-4 hours, and always directly after eating. I have been flossing 2-3 times a day since day 2.
Still drinking with straws
I put on a lot of vaseline on my lips to prevent it from drying out, as I can’t close my mouth “relaxed” yet. I think it helped to an extent.
Huge mistake practically skipping breakfast the morning of the surgery, also because the night before I didn’t pay a lot of attention to dinner. I think if I had more fuel it would have been a little easier.
7 days post op
Pretty uneventful, the bruise on my hip is a little wild, the swelling on my face has gone down tremendously.
Walking is still a little difficult, but a lot better.
——————
The doctor calls quite regularly to check up and I am very happy that I chose to go with him at the end. He and the anesthesiologist are amazing.
—————— For some reason I thought this was going to be a lot easier. Maybe it was because the surgery coordinator said I can go home 2 days post op which made me believe it would have been okay by then, or maybe it was because most posts I’ve seen about it seemed to have been somewhat easy. I think I definitely did not pay attention to how painful the bone graft was going to be. I would NOT recommend doing this alone. The doctor also told me once I was there he is surprised that I came alone after all. Before I went, I asked the operation coordinator if I must sleep in the hospital one night, because I am coming alone, and she told me I will be fine alone because I am very close to the hospital, and a lot of patients stay in that specific hotel to recover. In hindsight I wish I would have insisted on sleeping in the hospital that one night.
——————
Biggest 3M: post-op concern is lip incompetence and some soft tissue asymmetry. Hopefully this clears up between months 3-6. Otherwise I will enquire about a revision or a mentalis resuspension.
Biggest 4M concern: still slightly worries about the lower lip, but it has improved drastically. This is the first month I am also not on the fence about having had this operation and starting to like the results
Tl;dr operation was harder than expected, mental rollercoaster until month 4, only liked results by month 4, still slightly worried about lip competence (it’s getting better), still drooling a lot at night

I live own the mobile home I live in, I purchased it from my Father about seven years ago now. There were some maintenance things that needed done with it when we purchased it that we 100% should have had looked at when we moved in and we didn't so it's biting us in the rear now. Chalk it up to being young and not knowing any better I guess.
A leaking persistent shower faucet has likely caused the entire wall behind the shower and the space between the shower wall and our bedroom closet to be moldy as we discovered today while cleaning out the closet. I have been wanting to move for a while now, ever since encountering plumbing issues in the kitchen during the winter, but our credit scores dipped below what most places will accept during that time because we were shorted a paycheck in the winter.
My Dad said he has someone who would likely want to buy the place from me, but with the mold situation I'm not so sure he will still want to. At this point, I am not really sure what I am going to do and I feel trapped. I am currently unemployed and my partner is the only one making money. I've been desparately trying to find a job but haven't had any call backs.
I'm not expecting anyone to be able to give me much advice, just wanted a place to vent with some people who may be in similar circumstances now or maybe have been in the past. I'm in Indiana btw, if that helps anything.

I'm on the LAUSD echoice website and have read the thing with a fine tooth comb. I mentor a kid in junior high who loves working with animals and I think would enjoy attending NOHO's magnet for zoo/biological sciences. I realize that they would get transportation and all that however I have some questions. Say they get in. Are all the classes that they would have with kids that are also in the magnet? Also my understanding of magnets in LAUSD is if they apply for 3 different ones and don't get into the one they really one, they either have to take that spot or they lose their points or something? I have no kids of my own so I'm trying to figure this out!

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Hi fellow cat owners,
One of my cats loves to play with his water sources, he prefers throwing all the water out. This has resulted in damaged floors, a wet house and often a wet cat in my bed. He does this with normal bowls, a big casserole dish (my other cat likes to drink from a casserole dish 😑) and with multiple types of fountains. Now I have put one of his fountains in the shower so it's not that big of a disaster if he plays around with it there, but I can't put all water sources in my tiny bathroom. His other fountain is placed on a baking tray so that catches most of the water. But still, it's a daily struggle. I'm so done with having to mop up everything everyday and having a wet cat sit in my bed. How do you guys prevent your cats from doing this? Or are your cats normal?
He has a kitty pool btw in summer, but he refuses to play with that of course. Because cats.

My boyfriend of 10 years works so much and I am alone most nights. We just moved to a new small town. I'm too shy to go out and try to meet folks cuz well.. everyone is 10+ years older than me and has a family. No friends nearby.
I find myself on the verge of tears tonight knowing I'll have dinner alone, again. I won't even see him til the late afternoon tomorrow. He will wake up shower, and immediately leave for work. Very little time for chit chat. Even if I wake up before him.
Some days he likes to spend time with me knowing it's been a while but damn, he has no real idea how hard it is on the daily.
Just feeling very isolated and sad. The sun is out, it's 65. I'm gonna go outside and do some yard work.

“I just want to find my person, the one who lights up when I message and who can make me smile with a simple text. I want my person to vent to and be vented to. I want a someone to trade chores with and cuddle. To grow old to argue and fight and make up. To live and live with.“
Hi, I’m 24 from the UK. I am really a traditionalist when it comes to love. I like super cute romance, the kind you see in hallmark movies. I like to send cute texts, message gm and gn everyday, just to feel wanted and make sure my partner feels wanted also.
I have been hurt really badly in the past. So please be gentle with me. I’m a shy person, I don’t trust easily, so it could take me a little while to fully open up. But for the right person I will show my adventurous, outgoing side.
My main interests are sports and travelling, I also enjoy watching shows. My favourite sport is football (soccer) but I like nearly all sports. I have traveled to 22 countries so far and hope to visit many more. My favourite shows include succession, mr robot, and got. I have two pets, a dog and a cat. I’m really an animal person. I don’t mind what your interests are and if ours match or not, I will make an effort to take interest in your passions.
When it comes to sex I’m rather submissive. That’s not to say I wouldn’t be open to trying dominance. I just am quite a submissive person. I like to shower my partner in love, serve them and do things for them, both sexually and non sexual. If you want a boy you can control, that’s me lol. But I like cuddles just as much if not more than sex. Cuddling and kissing someone you love feels better than anything.
In regards to location, UK, US or Canada works best. I am open to long distance, have done it before and I believe it can work as long as eventually you plan to close the gap somehow. I find I connect better with girls from North America, idk why but I have always just hit it off better with them. Maybe the British accent charms them lol.
I just want to find someone to grow old with. But firstly a genuine connection. Someone who gives me those feels in my tummy. Makes my heart pound. Turns me on. I want to smile when I see your name pop up on my phone.
If you have read all this feel free to message me. I won’t bite. Initial attraction matters for me but it’s just as much if not more about personality. Thanks for reading ❤️

Good Afternoon Exchangers,
Today I would like to offer a mix of different knives. All knives will come with box and paperwork originally offered with each knife. Bundles welcome. YOLO is king and I prefer PayPal Friends and Family. Trades are welcome, but cash is king. Thanks for looking.
Time Stamp
Spyderco Lil Native -- Jade G-10 scales installed with S30V steel. This set of scales is cut out so front flipping is accessible. Original black scales are also included. Blade is scuffed on one side and is shown in pictures. SV -- $120
CLONE Spyderco Para 3 LW -- It is what it is. It has a pretty good action but is definitely a clone. FRN scales and marked BD1N steel. SV -- $35
Steel Will Cutjack -- Black FRN scales with D2 steel and a liner lock. Great harder use knife with very good action on bronze washers. Never cut or carried. SV -- $40
Ka-Bar Dozier -- Black FRN scales with AUS8 steel. Back lock with thumb hole version. Very good condition. SV - $25
CJRB Ria -- Jade G-10 scales and AR-RPM9 steel. Very snappy and a nice gentleman's carry. Like new condition. SV - $30
Thanks again for looking and reach out with any questions.