Hi! I was just thinking about a few similarities between the two games and thought they where worth adressing so overwatch can stop making the mistakes halo made and learn from how it handles certain mechanics
In halo 4, 343 introduced a new system to multiplayer similar to that of CoD's loadout system, where you get to pick your own loadout for multiplayer matches. I want to draw attention to two choices of secondary weapon in particular, the plasma pistol and the boltshot. Both of these options let you start the match with a one shot right out the gate (the noob combo and the boltshot's shotgun).
Needless to say, halo 4 is widely regarded as one of if not the worst halo multiplayer of all time and it's population jumped off a cliff in record time.
In general, halo tends to handle one shots by being extremely particular about what can and can't one shot. Typically only power weapons are allowed to one shot, and those are rarely spawned on the map and are hotly contested so if you want one, your gonna have to fight tooth and nail for it and they normally only have enough ammo for 3-4 mags so your one shot rampage can only last so long even if you manage to survive long enough to use it all up. The sniper can oneshot from any range similar to widowmaker, but you only get 12-16 shots at maximum before you have to go back to battle rifles and DMRs. The energy sword (especially in halo 2) is like a gigabuffed dragonblade, but you normally only get about 10 swings before you're done. In short, one shots are limited and earned instead of infinite and freely given to anyone willing to play a specific hero.
As for hero specific things, three come to mind, cryofreeze, translocator, and junkrat mines. In halo reach there was an armour ability called armour lock, it would freeze the user in place and make them temporarily invincible...and no one liked it. All It did was delay your fight, they where probably going to die to a grenade right afterwards anyway and if something happened that saved them you'd just feel cheated out of a kill you otherwise would have rightfully earned
In halo 4 there was an enemy called the promethian knight. It was big and powerful and was generally considered bullshit to fight because of two things, it had a melee attack where it would teleport straight at you and, you guessed it, one shot you, and it could teleport away if it took too much damage. This teleport was generally limited to close range though so if there wasn't too many enemies in the way you could make the trip to where they left to and finish the job.
One of the less painful examples here comes in the form of the grenade launcher from Halo reach, aka the noob tube. It had a function where if you held down the fire button you could than release the button to detonate the grenade plus an emp whenever you wanted, leading to people just detonating the grenade when it was somewhat close to the opponent. General annoyance followed although it was helpful against armour lock.

Just got her and played through the whole event. Was short but gotdamn they couldnt nail her harder if they could! Her personality was so fun to watch. The SASS, the PERFECT VOICE ACTING, the CUTENESS, the funni gremlin vibes. I was already sold before but holy hell. Her EN VA is one of the best in the game imo.
Also i would like to beep and beep with her. Just imagine the "gaming" sessions.

my brother is 14m and i'm 22f.
when i was 7 and he was a newborn, my mom had to move states to escape domestic abuse and we were dirt poor. my mom was working so hard and i helped out as much as i could. over the years, my mom married and her and my step father worked late nights virtually everyday, and i became a second mother to him. i babysat him, fed him, and changed his diapers since i was in 5th grade. in middle school i was frustrated that he'd go out of his way to steal my toys and he always wanted whatever i had. he wanted my animal crossing before he could even read purely i had it. but we were just kids yknow? that's just what kids do.
we fought throughout my time in middle school over shit like that. we've gotten in our share of physical fights and i definitely left some kind of impression of him because of that. i was bullied a lot for being short and when we fought, i would bully him for the same thing. physical fights would be reoccurring up until i entered high school.
by now, my parent's economic status has improved greatly. my parents were able to buy a house, year or two later they put in a pool, and are able to afford brand new cars soon after. we definitely argued about nonsense still, but i can't remember any big huge particular fight. we were closer then than we are now though. i remember being sent to buy a pizza for him almost everyday, to the point that the lil cesears lady recognized me and we became friends LOL. i was always stuck at home because "someone needed to watch the boy" and my dad was just strict like that. i think it was during my junior year when it came out my dad was cheating on my mom and he was out of the house for two weeks. it's important to note that my dad has a kid in his home country and always felt guilty that he couldn't raise him. he met my brother as a baby and raised him like his own, while we have a strained relationship because we could never connect like that. i mention it because while he was out of the house, my brother stole $300 from my mom's purse and gave it out to his friends at the playground. i'm sure it was some kind of trauma response and he wanted to keep his friends around, but the stealing habit never left him. i remember my senior year when i wanted to stay afterschool for play rehearsal and i had to bring him because he couldn't be home by himself. i was staying home by myself AND watching over a toddler when i was his age, but regardless i still brought him with me to practice, and still got him a pizza after.
then i went off for college. it was great! got away from my parents and him and i only have to deal with them during short visits and summer vacations. me and him definitely grew apart. he entered middle school and got all preteen-y and shit. we argued, but just arguments that'd dissipate in the next day or two. he continued to steal my stuff though. he did the typical rummaging any younger sibling would do to an older one; there was always a fight over a hoodie, DS games, toys, whatever.
i was really into polymer clay shit in middle school and he'd always attempt to take my supplies but not make anything with them. when i went off to college, he went in my room and claimed any and all of the art stuff i left, including those old charms. i kept everything in a little box in my desk and he took it. mashed up, broken, cracked, colored over all of my work of a hobby i had for 4 years. i used polymer clay to prevent myself from the trichotillomania i developed as a result of the rape trial and trauma i was dealing with at that time. he's definitely taken a lot more, but that one really hurt.
i come back during one visit and i bought a shiny new usb-c charger. goes "missing" one day. immediately assume it's him, confront and he denies over and over again. it's been so long since i've seen it, i start to believe it. i leave, a month goes by, come back. found it in his room, of course.
during one summer vacation, i got really into spray painting and stencils and i spent weeks on this one fine-line stencil. i even took it to my summer job to work on. i went back to school and left it, and i come back and he put a pushpin through it and has it hanging on the wall! took my shit back immediately.
another time, i'm home for winter break. my mom gifts me new airpod pros for christmas and gifts him airpod 3rd gen. not good enough for him because i magically lose them like three weeks after getting them. felt guilty as fuuuuck. didn't tell my mom because i thought i genuinely lost them. i go back to school, months go by. i'm visiting regularly still. i see he's got his airpods and a new case for them. at this time, my grandma had been visiting us for a few months and it's a week before she goes back, so my parents decided to stay at a beach house. along with my family, my parents invite five of my brothers friends because there's a room of several bunk beds. it's a friend's place so my mom asked me to set the beds with our sheets to keep it clean. it's so much work to put bedding on bunk beds yall. made nine beds total for everyone. all of my brother's friends need rides to the beach house, which is an hour away with traffic. i have a small car so i have to take two trips. four hours of driving total, two of which i'm transporting a carful of loud-ass "mommy's little angels". and i'm still in a good mood because i'm gonna be chillin in a beach house! had a great time, no issues. it's monday and it's my last morning there, im in my bed scrolling on twitter. i get the fucking notification of MY airpods case being opened. after i've gone the extra miles for him. took my shit back as soon as he left the room to play. they were in terrible condition, all scratched up, dirty as fuck, and blown out because he listens to them too loud. i left right away for class that day. didn't confront him, but i found out from my mom that his whole trip was ruined and he blamed his friends lolz. i confronted him on the next visit and he apologized obviously, can't do much when you're caught red-handed.
now im back again for summer vacation. we haven't been hanging out but we haven't had a huge argument or anything either. today, my parents went out for an event so i ordered takeout for us. we both got a plate, a side order, and a drink. we eat and watch a movie. we finish and the movie ends so i tell him to feed the dogs. he says no at first but i tell him if i fed him, the least he can do is feed the dogs and he begrudgingly agrees. instead of getting up, he falls asleep for two hours. i tell him several more times to go feed them and he firmly says no. i pull his blanket (a gift from ME) off of him, and he gets so mad he starts to physically fight me. the boy has his ego up because now he's taller than me and has been working out so he thinks he's stronger too. he wrestles me down the couch, i overcome him, we cuss and argue, he walks away. he leaves with a bloody lip and i have a broken acrylic nail. happened at 9:30 and it's 11:50 now. i fed the dogs and i'm just waiting for my parents now.
i know he'll get in trouble, but i want him to change. i know he's got all those fuckass puberty hormones in him but it feels like he just doesn't learn. is there any resources i can read? what can i do differently? is this normal little brother stuff? i don't want to continue this weird strained relationship we have. i feel like i've given so much of my childhood to him and he's become a spoiled brat. i feel myself becoming bitter and i don't want to be

Hi, I’m a first time bunny owner. My bunny is almost 3 months old. I got him at 8 weeks and he’s been warming up to me fairly quickly from what I’m told. He’s been showing many signs of comfort and developing trust such as he’s been flopping and grooming around me practically from day one and flopping next to me for the past week. I bite my nails so they are always short. Today I put on long(extending past the edge of my finger) press on nails and my bunny has been biting and tugging on them. I know that some nibbling can be a sign of affection and bonding and he has recently been nibbling my clothes and taking interest in the things occupying my attention. My concern, however, is that these behaviors are acts of aggression and I’m just worried that I’ve upset him and I wanted to ask for the perspective of more experienced rabbit owners. Does anyone have any advice or input?

I (12, F) was at a barbecue last night at my uncle's house. We were making smores and me being the psychotic human thing I am was staring at the beautiful, crackling, warm fire. My aunt looked at me and said, "Would you please stop acting like a physio path? My other family is here and uh- you're making me look bad."
I snapped out of looking out of looking at the fire and gave my aunt a dirty look. After a few hours I was eating my 5th smore (No judge. me love smores.) and when I finished my siblings were sleeping inside so I was allowed to make my OWN smore. I took the pointy stick and put a smore on it. I was staring at the fire while cooking my smore and I zoned out (As one with ADHD does) and my smore caught on fire without me knowing. My aunt snapes her fingers in my face and I snap back to earth. I blow out my smore and eat it. I look at my aunt and she's very creepily staring at me. I get a bad feeling, so I got to the restroom not closing/locking the door. I was splashing my face with water to calm myself down. Then my aunt walks in and she says, "you need to stop staring at that stupid @$$ fire. I will not hesitate to put it out"
I stare into her eyes not blinking or anything. The water still running. she looks uneasy. Then I slowly move towards her and say,
"I don't care if you put out the fire, I really don't care. So put it out and make everyone else suffer from massicot bites and the cold."
She left the room silent. I turned of the water. All I could think of was how weak she was. Who gets scared of straight eye contact and a low voice? Whatever, When I came outside she was crying and was acting like I did something to her! My parents yell at me and tell me that they thought they raised me better. My mum (Still has a broken ankle but she doesn't need crushes or anything anymore just a boot) tells me to sit in the car and play my phone or something. I looked out the window and my aunt falls to her knees?! WHY IS SHE SO DRAMATIC?! a few minutes later they go inside to get my sister and brother. I get out of the car and run over to the fire they still hadn't put it out.(Suprisingly) I look at it and I touch it. It starys to burn but I kept it there. My finger turned black so I lifted it. The door opens but only my aunt comed out. She said the others were getting my siblings. She walks over wondering what I was doing. I scream and my parents come outside. My aunt looks over and my parents come running. They come to me, Holding my finger. They asked me what happend so I said this,
"She dragged me out of the car a-and sh-she grabbed my hand and put my finger into the fire. She said if I screamed, she would do worse and bring you two into it!"
My parents look at her. Long story short. We don't talk to her anymore. Another aunt out of the family! that's 3 aunts now! Wanna hear the other stories?

Sorry I write a lot lol.
Anyway, I typically don’t feel the need to share everything about me online, but my life after coming out as gay and a Femboy almost two years ago, keeps getting better and better. I couldn’t ask for anything more. Everything is working out great. What I really wanted to share was that right around the time I came out to my ENTIRE family and all that jazz which went super well, (Just haven’t told my dads side and my dad and I both agreed maybe we shouldn’t tell them just yet. Lol) I had showed my mom and dad the feminine types of clothing I liked, and they were cool with it and my dad said as long as it makes you happy and more comfortable as you, just nothing too much. (If you know what he means)
Although after about a week my mom overly processed thigh highs and me wearing a crop top or skirts and just didn’t want me to be that revealing and attract that kind of attention in public. Right when I was bout to order the clothing, she told me in a pretty nice way it’s just too revealing and all that crap, which I did respect. Let me remind you this was almost 2 years ago.
So to continue, my parents let me buy other feminine clothing through that period of time it just couldn’t be revealing in any sort of way. So, I bought stuff like not revealing woman’s clothes and accessories. I accepthis for what it wascause I respect my parents and I was also grateful for everything. (And still am) But today I got a sudden itch and I felt like I just needed to get my hands on a pair of thigh highs and I was already about to order some other stuff off of Amazon like an epilator and nail gels. So I put dual pairs of thigh highs in my cart along with some cute punk styled cargo pants that I had wanted and spandex booty shorts that my parents also have told me in the past that it’s too much.
BUT as I was on the area where you choose shipping for each of the products my mom walked in the room and there was something I was unsure about because the price had seemed to go up on the total cost. So I asked thinking she might know the answer to why the total had raised and she said “scroll up real quick I’ll show you” but in my head I knew if I scrolled up she would see the stuff I had picked out. My stomach dropped.
I scrolled up for her and she saw it and she literally either did not notice any of it which is highly unlikely or did, but my parents are letting me do my own thing now recently. But what was really cool was that she literally had no judgement towards any of it. She just helped me change the shipping to free which was the problem and was totally cool.
Now I’ll have two pairs of thigh highs and the booty shorts! One pair for me and and one for my bf! This was only one section of my whole story of coming out and meeting my bf. I’ve got many other stories, but I’m waiting till I finish the rest of my schooling which I’m right about to and then write a book with my bf about all of our experiences that have to do with meeting one another and being us.

It’s becoming fucking exhausting. Every single day, it never goes away. there’s never anymore good days. 3 years ago, I felt the best I had ever felt about myself. I was happy when I looked in the mirror. In hindsight, I was extremely under weight (111lbs) & so skinny, I had no fat on my body whatsoever. but I didn’t care. I liked myself. I was happy. I was getting a spray tan every two weeks, nails & toes were done, I put on make up, I liked my body in my clothes, I once walked out of the house in a crop top that looked like a sports bra & a pair of shorts. Didn’t even get self conscious when I was around people. flash forward to now. I’m 23. with a toddler. still 18lbs heavier than when I got pregnant. A saggy stretch mark stomach. Skin so pale you can see through it. Not diagnosed but it appears to look like “raynauds”. My hair is just unmanageable and stays in a permanent mom bun cause who has the time to take care of themselves with a 1.5 year old & a husband who’s gone Mon-Fri. I feel like I have no jawline. My shoulders are broad and make me look manly. I have a lazy eye from hell. my teeth are yellow no matter how much I brush them. they’re crooked. and it’s just like everything about myself sucks. My friends & family are very joking people, as am I. We all crack on each other so sometimes there’s low blows. None of us get angry or too hung up on them. but lately, if anyone picks at me at all, it stays in my mind. Recently, they laughed and picked because I have no rhythm. I can’t dance. I can’t move my body. I’m just stiff as fuck and don’t know how to loosen up. Also picked on how ugly my feet are. I have ingrown toe nails & dry, hard, feet. I’ve been trying to fix them for a couple months now but nothing is working. Now I don’t even want to wear open toed shoes. It’s just all these small things that hinder my quality of life in such superficial stupid ways and I know there’s bigger problems, trust me, I have bigger problems, but these just internally bother me every day and it gets tiring. I don’t want to share with the people around me because I don’t want to open up & be that vulnerable for no reason. They can’t help. Idk what I need or what I could even do. It was nice to get some of it into words tho.

I am dx adhd and strongly suspect I'm also autistic. However I think my expression is atypical.. I am very hyper expressive and hyper emotive in social situations sometimes, especially when it is new and I am nervous or know that I am expected to perform (more than usual with masking or the performance related stakes are higher). I often try to dramatically people please in these situations or act the part of a total goof, maybe as a way to gain social buy-in and negate any questions about my oddness. But its only ever in short bursts and I always shut down so hard after. Over the years my stamina to do this has become significantly less andess. Currently I am burnt out and lack any ability.
That said, I am also a classic autistic in that I have intense special interests, significant sensory issues (seeking and avoidance), shutdown periods, highly visual, patterned, systemized thinking and perception, struggles with uncertainy and change, literal thinking, difficulty building/maintaining relationships and still feel like looking at eyeballs is like staring into the sun. I also studied books/film/tv/people in the wild and psychology religiously my whole life to "figure out" how to nail a social interactions because when I was a child/youth I had 0 clue what was happening around me socially. I practiced facial expressions to try to match the ones that seemed "just right" based on the media I was watching and actually tried to train myself to ALSO feel/pair an emotion on the inside to that face so it would seem more genuine. Like when I smiled and saw myself smiling I tried to think of things that made me happy because that smile looked more genuine. and I thought about how nice it was to see a smiling face and to just be able to summon a happy feeling. the more I practiced the more the two came together to the point where it clicked and is mostly natural now. I actively studied people I thought seemed especially charming, outgoing and likable (the "best of the best") and worked to mimick and internalize their mannerisms. I often would tag along behind real people as a youth to observe them in scenarios, to their great annoyance. Was accused of staring and "following" others.
Sometimes I nail the social performance and I'm very well spoken and charismatic and more socially graceful than even my NT peers! But never for long and even then most of the time I think it still comes across just a litttle bit too strange or intense, bit too expressive or tryhard.. a little off! or sometimes I will manage to say so or do the blatantly wrong thing (because i fundamentally still dont really understand) ever so charmingly! So the social faux pas is passed off more easily. It's entirely an over the top act I can never sustain and for days after I cant hold a basic conversation and don't want to see or be seen by anyone. I am totally wiped and shut down, and often become reclusive. I think I keep people at a distance so they dont see that I'm actually not always like that. I was raised in a very extraverted, emotional irish family that often gave me a hard time about always being quiet, tired and weird and wanting to be alone as a kid. I was bullied at home for it by my father and brother as well as at school near constantly. If I could come out of my room to give an outgoing social perfomance, or manage to do an outgoing social performance once a week or once a month for a few hours at a time say for extended family or houseguests than I was free to have my alone/special interest time later. I wonder if these factors shaped the mask that I wear? Maybe I learned to channel some of my ADHD related strengths into this to put on a more significant performance? My family was basically always telling me to be more expressive in some way shape or form and I think I learned that giving my best, in many ways, was just not enough. It was go big or go home.
Currently I am so burnt out and could not summon this persona if I tried. I get the feeling this strategy was heavy overcompensation aimed at effectively "erasing" my autism to survive scrutiny. I am new to exploring my autistic traits but do identify strongly as autistic on the inside. Yet as I meet more people in the autistic community I still feel so self conscious because I feel like I must appear to be, on the outside (forgive me) the "least autistic person in the room".. Too social, too smiley, too verbal, too eager, too clownish etc etc. When I mask like this, I feel like I appear like just a very "socially strange ADHDer". I know this is ableist and I am working on challenging it.. And I think masking for Audhders must be to mask both our adhd and our autism.. Then sometimes I think: maybe I give myself far too much credit and my masking isn't that good 😂 Sometimes I cringe when I watch myself back on video talking to other people because I tend to stare at them with big wide eyes (like I'm surprised the whole time), tense and actively trying to look relaxed, my lips pulled back half pursed getting ready to say my line (nail my "part").. The eye contact is just a little too much for a little too long and I can see the other person get a bit unsure about me and they start looking away every now and then (uncomfortable).
Sorry for wicked wall of text.
I don't know. Does anyone relate? 😩

Toxic Rats: Geoff, Scott, Trent, Sammy, Sierra
Mutant Maggots: Anne Maria, Katie, Molly, Scarlett, Dave, DJ
Episode 06: Runaway Model
"Previously, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a stock shot of Wawanakwa, the capstone theme starting up in the background. "The campers got deep," the recap montage opened with Sierra and Molly sinking to the lake bed in their antique diving suits, the former quickly getting held back by Fang, "in an underwater scavenger hunt."
"Sierra quickly got under her team's skin as soon as she came back," Sammy was shown upset with Sierra for taking a picture of her, "and Anne Maria and Geoff began to develop feelings for each other," the two were shown having a conversation with each other in the morning.
"In the end, Leshawna was tossed for swiping everybody's stuff," Sammy was shown tossing out everyone's belongings from the bag, "even though it was really Scott. Sneaky," the host added over Scott admitting his role in the confessional.
"It's now Team Maggot versus Team Rat," the host said, the Maggots' logo appearing on-screen against a radiant golden background. The logo rotated around into the Rats' logo, and a five-way split-screen of the Rats' remaining members rose up from the background – Trent in the upper left against a brownish-red backdrop; Geoff in the upper right against dark blue; Sierra in the middle top against orange; Sammy in the bottom left against turquoise; and Scott in the bottom right against yellow. "Will the Rats man up before they're a man down? Let's hope not," Chris said as the scene cut to him standing at the end of the dock with Chef. "There's nothing more entertaining than a man down."
As if on cue, the wood under Chef started to creak and crack, breaking away and sending Chef plunging into the lake with a startled scream. Chris laughed. "More where that came from, right now, on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"
XXXXX
The sun was already high in the sky as the episode opened, and a loon cried out in the distance as the camera panned down onto DJ and Dave looking rather distressed outside the communal bathroom. The normal guy knocked on the door and asked "Is it our turn next?"
"Keep your panties on!" Anne Maria called out as the camera cut to the inside of the bathroom. The mirror on the back wall was too cracked and smudged to use, the trash can was grimy, and the strip of fly paper hanging in the corner was in need of a change, but nevertheless, Molly, Anne Maria, Katie, and Scarlett were still gathered along the countertop – Scarlett was sitting on the far left, Molly was plucking her unibrows, Katie was happily filing her nails, and Anne Maria was spraying her hair.
"Anne Maria?" Molly said. "Could I borrow some lipstick from you? I forgot it back at the cabin."
"You can help yourself, but don't go touching my hair spray," Anne Maria answered. She finished spraying her hair, and flicked it to show how bulletproof it was as it briefly shined. "Now that is how you do hair!"
"I prefer having a natural appearance," Scarlett clarified. "I'm mostly just here to wash my face and brush my teeth."
They later saw that Katie had pulled out a bag containing a makeup kit.
"What's that bag for?" Molly asked the influencer while brushing her hair.
"This is my portable makeup kit," Katie said. "If I need to get myself ready in the morning, this'll do the job in five minutes max."
"Do you carry that around with you at all times?" Anne Maria looked at the bag.
"Only when I'm traveling to places," Katie answered as she put on her lipstick. "I've done a lot of makeup tutorials with this thing, and they've skyrocketed my channel up to one million views."
"That's interesting to hear," Scarlett rolled her eyes. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'll be taking my leave."
Katie watched Scarlett and Anne Maria go, and turned to Molly. "By the way, you can borrow my lipstick too if you want."
Confessional: Katie
"Chris still has a hold of my tablet," Katie confessed. "I'm sure my subscribers are wondering why I'm inactive, but some of them will probably understand that I'm competing on a TV show."
Confessional: Molly
"Katie's been a lot more helpful to us with her device taken away, and now she wants to help me with fashion," Molly explained. "If that means she's not mad at me anymore, I'll take what I can get."
Confessional Ends
The scene flashed to the girls' side of the Rat cabin as Sammy said "I can't believe what happened last episode." The shot cut inside to show her sitting in her bunk bed. "Not only did people's belongings get taken, but Leshawna was pinned for it."
Sierra was using her phone until she heard Sammy. "What makes you so sure it wasn't Leshawna if the bag was under her bed?" the blogger emphasized.
"Someone else could've slipped it under there, and Leshawna's too respectful to touch our things!" Sammy enforced.
"I'll have to think about that more," Sierra said. "You know, this is the most I've ever heard you say."
"What do you mean?" Sammy asked.
"You're mostly silent, and also nervous most of the time," Sierra claimed.
"I just prefer keeping to myself," Sammy said. "I'm introverted."
"Have you managed to have any friends in your life?" Sierra wondered.
"I do, but I only have five friends," Sammy responded while holding her arm. "We make up the cheerleading team back home, and they really love and care about me, but they tend to forget about my own opinions."
"Have you ever told them it bothers you?" Sierra asked again.
"Not really. I don't want them to hate me," Sammy said sadly.
"I never had many friends, so I don't know how to help you there, but if you want to let them know something is wrong, just do it," Sierra shrugged. "I'm sure it can't hurt."
Confessional: Sammy
"Sierra may have a point. She's eccentric, but she definitely can be smart." Sammy admits. "My friends can drag me into activities I'm not interested in, although cheerleading is something I like to do."
Confessional Ends
The whining ring as the scene cut to a shot of one of the island's loudspeakers heralded a broadcast from Chris. "Iiiit's challenge time!" he began. "Campers~! Meet me on the other side of the island~!" he announced in an almost sing-song voice.
\
The footage immediately skipped ahead to the two teams already nearly assembled on two sets of low bleachers in a clearing lined with a handful of stage and spotlights. The five Rats were seated on the stands to the right of the camera, while DJ was just now filing in with his teammates on the left.
"Yo Katie," DJ greeted the girl. "Your hair is looking fantastic today.
"It's all thanks to this makeup kit," Katie showed her bag as DJ took his seat next to her. "It's really helpful for your looks."
The perspective inverted to reveal that the two teams had gathered before a large stage and runway, complete with a short catwalk and a large curtained-off backstage area. Chef was already waiting in the pink dress he'd worn to ceremonies back in season two, and Chris shortly joined him by way of descending from above with his jetpack. The host was wearing a sharp gray suit and fashionable glasses with tinted lens, but more noticeable were the changes to his hair – it was now pure white and long enough for him to sport a short ponytail.
Chef walked up as he landed and took the jetpack of his back, then walked away as Chris spread his arms and smiled. "Welcome to your challenge," he opened. "The Weird and Wild Fashion Spectacular!" He took a paper fan out of his breast pocket and waved it a bit as he spread his arms even wider.
"We're doing a fashion challenge? Awesome!" Molly cheered.
"Fashion? Now you're talkin'!" Anne Maria sprayed her hair about while complimenting Chris.
"You won't be walking the catwalk," Chris started to fan himself, "no-no-no-no. No amount of fashion can help you people."
"You don't say?" Dave mumbled to himself.
"Here's how it's gonna work," Chris continued. "Each team gets a wardrobe of clothes," the camera cut to a dresser, clothes rack, and several pieces of luggage on the side of the stage, "a make-up kit, and ten minutes to dress and make up a model." Chef held up an hourglass and glared mutely at the camera. "Which, you'll send down the runway," the shot zoomed in on the host's fan as he walked his fingers across it, "to be judged by myself, Chef, and today's Total Drama classic competitor, Lindsay!"
One of the suitcases on the side of the stage popped open, revealing the former contestant. "Yay! Don't you just love my new, special fashion boots?" Lindsay asked the campers, raising a leg to show off blue boots different from her regular brown ones.
"Wait, we get to dress an actual model!" Trent got excited.
"Uh-huh," Chris said, scraping some white powder off his shoulder with his fan. "Right after you catch one."
"Catch a model?" Geoff wondered. "Why would one even come to this island?"
"Did I say human models?" Chris corrected, fanning himself again as he walked across the stage. "Don't think so! No, your models are in there!" He thrust his finger off to the right, forcing Lindsay to duck under his arm. The camera quick-panned to the woods just as an earth-shattering roar shook the area.
"They're wild! They're mutated!" Chris told the campers, the camera moving behind his back. "And like me, they despise teenagers." The five Rats were shown looking shocked and concerned.
"Okay fashionistas," the host said in a campy accent, "go!" He blew his airhorn again, and the campers ran off.
\
The footage flashed ahead to a trail in the woods, Sierra and Geoff searching behind a rock and Sammy looking at a bush in the background while DJ walked by in the foreground. The camera panned to the right and stopped on Anne Maria and Scarlett, who were warily looking upwards.
Something croaked above them and the shot cut to a small frog, seemingly normal aside from an eye stalk on the top of its head, sitting on a branch. With a grunt of effort, Molly pounced on it from the right, and smiled when she opened her hands and saw she'd caught it. Unfortunately for her, the mutant frog produced an odd noise and flash of light, blinking out of sight but quickly reappearing on top of the confused young woman's head. With another noise and flash of light it disappeared, this time bringing Molly with it, and they blinked back into existence in mid-air a few yards away. Molly screamed as she started to fall, and the mutant frog teleported away to presumed safety before its failed assailant landed with a crash on the forest floor.
\
In another part of the forest, Trent was looking around absentmindedly while approaching what appeared to be a gigantic turtle shell, a short and spiky tail poking out of one end. The boy tapped the tail with his foot, but gasped when the tail suddenly wrapped around his leg and pulled him inside the shell. The beast inside growled and stood up, its stout legs and turtle head popping out of the shell's holes...along with Trent. With another growl, the mutant punched him away, and he landed in a heap with a pained groan.
\
The camera cut next to what appeared to be an ordinary beaver sitting perfectly still just at the edge of a bush. Dave rose, grinning from another bush in the background, then pounced upon it. His jubilation quickly faded into confusion as the unmoving beaver was somehow lifted up by its tail, taking Dave with it.
The shot cut outward to reveal the beaver has no more than a lure of a large bipedal anglerfish-like monster, which promptly roared. Katie, who was standing nearby, promptly ran away, and was soon followed by Dave and the angler mutant.
\
Another flash moved the focus to a close-up of a slice of pepperoni pizza, lying on the ground in the middle of a loop of rope that led off to the left. "Pizza? What's this doing here?" Scott said, the camera zooming out to show him looking down at it. He looked up and tilted his head, and the shot cut over to none other than Fang not quite hidden behind a tree, an axe in one hand and the anchored rope of his snare trap in the other.
Scott knew what was going to happen, but decided to have a little fun. "Too bad there's pepperoni on it, otherwise I'd totally eat that," he said loud enough for the shark to hear as he walked off.
Fang palmed his face and walked over to the slice and started picking the toppings off of it. Meanwhile, Scott used his shark tooth to cut the rope of the snare.
The effect was instant. Fang was hoisted up in the air by his wrist, and Scott came over to where the pizza was. "Oh perfect! No pepperoni!!" He picked up the pizza and ate it as he left, the shark growling at him as he was hung up.
\
The scene cut abruptly to a massive mutant brawl between a massive two-headed rabbit, two spiny woolly beavers, and a hairless squirrel zapping them with its eye-lasers from a nearby branch. The camera panned left as a giant hermit crab scuttled up and snapped its claws, with Trent, Sammy, and Geoff watching from behind a bush in the background with wide eyes.
"So which one do we use?" Geoff asked.
"Uh, maybe we should find something that can't eat us," Sammy replied.
A whine signaled the loudspeaker turning on once again, and soon enough Chris's announcement rang through the air. "Five minutes, people!"
"Hey, Rats!" Sierra quickly followed, directing her teammates' attention to their right. "Why don't we use that rat?" he asked, the shot cutting to a close-up of a small rat happily chewing on a leaf atop a fallen log. A large hairless rat jumped onto the log, quickly stuffed the rat into its mouth, then chittered and looked around.
"It'd be easy to catch and dress. It just needs a little more domestication," Trent proudly said.
"That's a good plan," Scott supported with a grin.
"Stand back," Geoff told everybody and went towards the rat's direction. "I have an idea for the fashion style."
\
"Don't give up yet! There's gotta be something on this island we can catch!" Molly told her teammates, the Maggots now hunkering down behind a bush.
"How about that critter?" DJ looked over the bush, and the shot cut to none other than Sasquatchanakwa walking into a cave, oblivious to the teens watching him.
"How are we gonna get him out of that cave?" Dave asked.
Scarlett smirked. "I've conducted a plan, but I need a bag for this," she told her teammates.
\
The Maggots were back on the stage watching Scarlett seated near Katie's makeup bag. She folded a few clothes together, squirted it with glue, and shook the bag together.
"This is what I call a "Detonating Duffel Bag," Scarlett talked about her creation. "It can and will dress any target within its sixty foot blast radius! With a mix of glue and clothes it'll be unremarkably simple to just launch the bag at the animal."
Confessional: Anne Maria
"I like her way of thinking," Anne Maria told the camera, "even if I don't understand what she's saying half the time."
Confessional Ends
Katie picked up her bag and looked at what was inside. "Puffy sweater vests? Plaid skirts? High knee socks? It seems you just put together an outfit that resembles yourself, Scarlett."
"Katie has a point," Dave told the brainiac. "You clearly made the outfit something you yourself would like instead of what everyone would like."
Scarlett was annoyed. "So what else should we use instead?"
"How about we compare our fashion styles and see what we'll all agree on," Katie suggested.
"That can work," DJ nodded. "To our cabins!"
\
The scene immediately flashed away to the Rats where their own rat has been dressed by Geoff.
"This rat looks ready to party and have fun!" Geoff described his choice as the rat was wearing a black collared shirt, a brown cap, a black chain necklace, and gray sneakers.
The rat expressed its dislike of the party style by ripping the clothes into shreds.
"Seems the rat isn't a big fan of the choice of fashion," Scott said.
A sudden ringing got the team's attention, and Chris announced "Three minutes remaining!" over an unseen loudspeaker.
"If you guys don't mind, I'll take a crack at it," Sammy offered.
\
The scene cut back to the Maggot cabin, where the team were inside the girls' side of the cabin.
"So these are what we normally wear," Katie said as she presented a row of clothes on the bunk bed. From left-to-right, it showed clothes belonging to Scarlett, Anne Maria, DJ, Dave, Molly, and Katie.
"That's correct," Anne Maria agreed, "but why are our clothes all lined up?"
"You know how some teams normally can't agree on anything, right?" Katie started her conversation.
"You're right about that," Molly said.
"So what if instead of arguing, we just combine our fashion styles into one big burrito?" Katie said extravagantly.
"A fashion mesh? That's a weird way to go, but I don't want to argue right now," Dave told them.
"If I had my sewing kit, I'd whip up a line of clothing suited to fit our animal, but since we're running out of time, let's just try to stuff all our clothes into the bag," Molly suggested.
"I'll add some dye colors inside just to make our colors clash," Katie said.
"I'll assist as well, but let's make sure to actually fold our clothes," Dave emphasized.
"Agreed," Scarlett said. "We want to make our outfit mash look as clean and fresh as possible."
"Now that we have a plan, let's get right to it," Molly encouraged the team.
Confessional: Dave
"I don't like to give away my clothes, but once I realized that I only have to give two pairs, I went along with the plan," Dave admitted.
Confessional Ends
The scene flashed back to the Rats, the camera positioned close to Sammy's face but focused on her four teammates behind her. The camera zoomed out as they watched her tighten a piece of cloth over their rat model.
"That should be about it," Sammy said. "Me and my friends tend to design clothes during our sleepovers."
"It's not bad, Sammy," Geoff started to say.
"I think you did a wonderful job," Trent critiqued.
Another ringing got their attention, and they looked up towards an unseen loudspeaker as Chris announced "One minute!"
"It's good enough," Scott declared. "Let's get back to Chris."
\
The scene flashed back to the Maggots hiding behind a rock near Sasquatchanakwa's cave.
"This DDD is ready for action," DJ held up the bag.
"What does it stand for exactly?" Anne Maria asked him.
"Detonating Duffel Bag," DJ made it more clear before tossing the bag over to Katie. "Go long!"
Katie ran towards the cave with the bag in hand as the scene cut to the inside. Sasquatchanakwa was sitting in a wooden armchair, drinking a can of soda and watching some jaunty-themed show on an old television set when Katie's bag landed in his lap. With a curious grunt he looked at the bag.
That's when the explosion happened, and when it did, the yeti let out a frightening roar, scaring the Maggots.
"That doesn't sound good!" Katie panicked.
Confessional: Katie
"I don't know if running away from Sasquatchanakwa is worse than hurting him," Katie said. "I'm not the fastest runner, but I'm not going to die."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut to a spotlight as it turned on; then a couple stage lights turning on as well; then a mutant squirrel hopping up next to a book-reading bear which lowered its book to reveal its three eyes, both animals looking at something curiously; then the stage and catwalk, Chris front and center with Chef and Lindsay – the former in sort of rapper-ish outfit with a red tracksuit and hat, earphones, and gold chains – sitting at the judge's table.
"It's freaky forest fashion time!" the host announced. "Rat-istas," he turned and pointed his fan backstage, "show me somethin' fierce." The five Rats walked out on stage, Geoff, Trent, and Sierra on the left with Sammy and Scott on the right.
"Chef, drop that needle!" Chris commanded next, the shot cutting to a close-up of a record turntable as the needle was dropped onto the spinning disc and a trendy tune began to play. The camera zoomed out, and Chef gave the host and campers a thumbs-up.
"This small rodent is wearing a fresh, popstar fashion style like no one else's," Sierra began smoothly, motioning to the gap between her and Sammy as their model reluctantly scurried out on all fours but continued down the runway on its hind legs. It was wearing a pink wig and a purple dress with white stripes. The camera followed it as it walked along looking both nervous and awkward, Sierra continuing her piece all the while. "Her pink hair matches well with her diva attitude and her dress screams fame." She finished with a grimace.
"A bit typical and overly glamorous," Chris said as the rat reached the end of the catwalk. "I give it an 8.5," the host announced as he held up a placard with his score.
The Rats shouted cheers of victory.
Chef held up an 8.0.
Lindsay held up a 1.8 to the uproar of the Rats. She realized her mistake and flipped her placard upside down, showing an 8.1. "Oops."
"Okay," Chris said tersely, looking back towards the catwalk. "Show me what you've got, Maggots!" he called out, the trendy music resuming as the shot cut back to the stage, showing it utterly empty. The camera zoomed in and the music kept playing, but for several more seconds there was still no movement backstage. "...Maggots?" Chris called out again and finally Katie ran out screaming at the top of her lungs.
"As you can see, the yeti is wearing a mix of several different styles based upon us," Katie said as her team quickly ran out to join her.
All six looked towards the backstage curtain, and the furious sasquatch growled and chased after them. His outfit consisted of several different styles – white sneakers resembling Katie's, long white socks resembling Scarlett's, pants resembling Anne Maria's, a blue and yellow collared shirt resembling Dave's, glasses resembling Molly's, and a hat resembling DJ's.
"The outfit consists of a variety of garments applied forcefully to random parts of his body," Katie said, cringing in terror as her team's model quickly tossed Scarlett, Dave, and Molly away again while DJ and Anne Maria quickly got off the stage. The ape-man grabbed her after she finished.
The music stopped, and Sasquatchanakwa finally noticed the three judges just as the first one spoke up. "That thing is huge," Lindsay gasped at the sight of the model before her, "but the outfit had too many themes. Maybe stick to just one next time."
"I agree with Lindsay," Chris admitted, fanning himself again. "It hardly complements the Yeti's husky physique."
Confessional: Katie
"Going with Scarlett's first idea for the yeti would have been boring," Katie groaned in disappointment, "but at least the yeti probably wouldn't have gotten as mad right now."
Confessional Ends
Still holding Katie, Sasquatchanakwa saw what he was wearing. Angry at the 6-way outfit put on him, he threw Katie away, took off the hat and glasses, kicked off the shoes and socks, and ripped off the pants and shirt.
"Chris is right. The team are too different-" Lindsay tried to say, but was cut off when the yeti suddenly reached forward and grabbed her by the head, yanking her out of her seat. The shot zoomed out as an engine whirred to life, revealing that Sasquatchanakwa had also commandeered Chris's jetpack. With the captive dumb princess in his arms, he took off into the air.
"Hey, he took my jetpack!" Chris quickly protested. The shot cut back to the ape-man and dumb blonde as Lindsay screamed, and Saquatchanakwa flew off to the foggy and ominous crags of Boney Island.
"Uh-huh...," Chris said blankly, still fanning himself. "Will Lindsay survive?" he asked the camera, lifting up his shades. "And am I legally liable if she doesn't? Find out, after the break."
\
(Commercial Break)
\

Age: 23 Height: 5'7 Gender: male Weight: 145 No medications None smoker Have allergies to dogs, cats, dust, dead roaches and a bunch of other stuff I can't remember but no food allergies And had a surgery at 16 years to remove my appendix for appendicitis
At work after a long while of not having really bad allergy symptoms, I got shortness of breath and chest tightness but this hit me pretty fast and hard and caught me off guard, noticed my body wouldn't yawn and finger nails started turning purple so I had to keep hold my breath so I wouldn't hyperventilate, this was happening for maybe 30 minutes
I told my coworker about it since I felt nervous and I was scared enough to the point I had 911 ready to call if it got worse, he told me to take some salt with water, cuz low salt can cause problems in the body, i poured almost a teaspoon amount on my hand and put it all on my tongue for a few seconds and downed it with water and after maybe 10 or 15 seconds, my shortness of breath and chest tightness started improving really fast and went away within less than a minute and I was able to breath like normal
I haven't been consuming much salt I think because I would eat a morning meal and usually add salt to it and later a fruit shake that had unsalted peanuts and that was it. I've been eating like that for some time now and didn't think about the low salt. Also have a history of allergies so I cut out wheat, dairy and fried foods which helped a lot and didn't have terrible symptoms in a goof while until today.
So can low salt consumption really be the cause of these bad symptoms I got?

Telecommunications Bill

A
B I L L
T O
make changes to the Telecommunications Infrastructure Nationalisation Act 2022 to bring Openreach as defined by the Telecommunications Infrastructure Nationalisation Act 2022 back into private ownership, but to retain public ownership of relevant infrastructure, and for connected purposes.
BE IT ENACTED by the King's most Excellent Majesty, by and with the advice and consent of the Lords, and Commons, in this present Parliament assembled, and by the authority of the same, as follows:-
Section One - Definitions
In this Act—
(1) “Openreach” means the government-owned operator for the government’s broadband rollout as defined by the Telecommunications Infrastructure Nationalisation Act 2022.
(2) “The National Telecommunications Network” means the body corporate run by the government to manage the government’s broadband rollout as defined by the Telecommunications Infrastructure Nationalisation Act 2022.
Section Two - Repeal of The National Telecommunications Network
(1) Section Two and the Schedule (One) of the Telecommunications Infrastucture Nationalisation Act 2022 are hereby repealed.
(2) Any salaried position, wage, or other such financial remuneration of members of The National Telecommunications Network and their staff as appointed under Section One Schedule One of the Telecommunications Infrastructure Nationalisation Act 2022 shall continue to be made available under the private Openreach for twelve months. Following that, any members or staff who are not kept in employment will be paid in full for six months, or given statutory redundancy whichever is higher, following the passing of this Act.
Section Three - Secretary of State empowered to make sale
(1) The Secretary of State may, by order, publicly sell Openreach and its subsidiaries.
(2) The Secretary of State must make an order under subsection (1) within one month after the day this Act comes into force.
Section Four - Short title, Commencement, and Extent
(1) This Act may be cited as the Telecommunications Act 2023.
(2) This Act comes into force six months after it receives Royal Assent.
(3) This Act extends to the United Kingdom.
This Bill was written by His Grace the Most Honourable Sir Sephronar KG KCT GBE LVO PC MP MSP FRS, the 1st Duke of Hampshire, 1st Marquess of St Ives, 1st Earl of St Erth, 1st Baron of Truro on behalf of His Majesty’s 33rd Government and was partially influenced by the Telecommunications Infrastucture Nationalisation Act 2022 by model-kyosanto.
Referenced Legislation:

• Telecommunications Infrastucture Nationalisation Act 2022

Opening Speech:
Deputy Speaker,
It is no secret that I fought tooth and nail against the Telecommunications Infrastructure Nationalisation Bill - now Act - at the time it was making its way through the House. I believe fundamentally that the state has no business operating broadband, or running state-owned providers. However, I have come to accept that the infrastructure is now well and truly state-owned, but the time has come to reverse the nationalisation of the broadband providers and abolish the National Telecommunications Network.
I am pleased to have secured agreement with the Labour Party to consider such an agreement, and I hope - with their support - to see this Bill swiftly make it through the House.
The best way to keep our broadband safe and good value for money is to ensure it remains in private hands, while the state maintains control and responsibility for the maintenance of our infrastructure.
This debate shall end on Saturday 10th June at 10pm BST

Should I just continue to say shorter even when they stop? This last time I said shorter twice and felt like I was a bit demanding. I want them short to where I can’t see my mail hang over my skin if I were to face my palm towards me.
Wondering if I should cut them short before going in but then again I don’t want to be embarrassed or judged about how bad they look.
Suggestions?

Bonjour. We will be traveling in France this summer and I might need to have my nails done during our trip. We’ll be in Nice when I’ll need them done. Are there walk in salons there, or if not, can you get an appointment on short notice? Merci!

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There are some deeds, some crimes and horrors even our Mother, the Universe itself, loathes beyond all. And when this is the case, neither time, nor space, nor reality itself can deny her vengeance.
Because time is a flat circle... and we all dance on its twisting disk. - kwong879, Pukan philosopher, Post Second Precursor War Reconstruction Era
For three days and three nights did the Lady Lord of Hell, the Detainee herself, in all of her fearsome matronly glory, tempt the First Biological Disciple, Daxin Freeborn, Enraged Phillip.
And for three days and three nights did he deny her.
And thus did he pass into memory and legend. - The Book of Telkan
And before I took the lives of the damned, He did appear before us and commanded my hand still.
His glowing blue form a radiant mercy. For us.
For them. - Glory, Failure, Temptation, & Redemption, Magnus Oathsworn
There is no doubt of the fact of malevolence. The very universe itself reaches out to crush what she has birthed in an eternal struggle of hatred. There are, however, some sins which even in the face of annihilation cannot be countenanced. Some acts which even this malevolent universe will not tolerate. Protect the infants at all cost, for they are survival, and to sacrifice survival for the sake of survival shall bring only suffering and doom. - Wisdom of the Traveler, Tribulations, Chapter 5 Verse 1.
In the Age of Paranoia, Humanity's leadership ordered terrible things done. Not because they knew they were necessary, but because they might become necessary. Never realizing that the existence of those terrible things would drive them to find a reason to use them. — Prof. Kuruka N'anga, University of the Sacred Bough, Terra Nuevo
While many things enrage the Lady of Hell, in fact most things seem to, certain crimes and sins earn her personal wrath. The many men who took everything from her. The idiotic creatures who thought themselves masters of everything. And those who commit cruelties upon the innocent. For she sees all of mankind's many many sins and knows very few are clean of them. Wise beings fear when cold gray eyes turn upon them.
We were desperate, and in our desperation we reached for things that will haunt me for all eternity. We could have stopped at anytime, we should have stopped before it was too late. We ignored the warnings, in our hubris we were assured that what we were doing was necessary. We were right, but it was still wrong and there is not enough time in the universe to pay for what we did. We ignored all the warnings and applauded ourselves on our success...only moments later the shouts of joy and celebration became screams of terror as the gray-eyed one illustrated why the warnings of these dark sciences should be heeded. --Words found in a blood-soaked journal at dark site research station, this was the only document recovered. Site glassed and all traces of the research were redacted.
It was misty, with a little bit of rain. The anomaly was hidden behind artificially generated cloud cover so that it looked more like an overcast sun than the strange globe of psuedo-reality it was. The starwalk station was empty, no bones, no shades, no scars from the furious fighting that had taken place after the Glassing had driven the SUDS personnel insane.
Holos flickered, some advertising restaurants or stores, others with directions, some with safety warnings, and still others with just public service holograms. The mist made the holograms flicker and fade in and out as the focused laser systems were scattered by the tiny water droplets suspended in the air.
There was a beep and the gate opened, allowing Surscee to step from the starwalk to the platform. She was wearing revealing leathers, a bustier, a short skirt with copper strips for reinforcement, tight weave fishnet stockings, and polished black leather boots with silver buckles. Around her shoulders was a gauzy sheer cape that shed the moisture even as it gleamed and sparkled.
She stopped to examine a few of the public service announcements. Some making her smile, others making her shake her head.
"You are a window to the world of my ancestors, nine thousand years gone," she said softly, touching the base of the holo. She moved to another and watched it. "We are not so different, you and I," she said, her voice full of wonder. She watched a PSA to remind everyone not to bring plants from Earth in case of seed contamination. "Your lives were full of danger that eventually became mundane," she said softly.
"That's humanity in a nut shell," the voice from behind her was low, rough, a woman's whiskey and cigarettes voice.
"Although ever changing, thus, we are," Surscee said, straightening up. She turned around and looked over the short matron in her dark charcoal gray skirt and blouse. "Greetings, fearsome one."
"Greetings to you, sorceress," the Lady Lord of Hell said. She looked Surscee up and down slowly. "Huh."
Surscee raised an eyebrow.
"Nice to see the Great Value Red Sonja look isn't just an act," the Lady Lord of Hell said, turning and walking into the mist. "Magic, science, mysticism, technology, all the same to the ignorant." Her voice faded as she walked away.
Surscee watched the short woman walk away, then turned and went back to following the path.
She was startled to discover that the vending machines were not VI driven, but just mechanical with a few holograms.
One of the vending machines that normally dispensed energy drinks and fizzybrews was ripped open, like someone had hacked on it with a blade. Surscee noted that most of the Liquid Hate was gone.
She got a lemon-lime fizzypop and followed the softly glowing holographic line of the ground until she finally came to a small park.
She stopped at the playground, leaning against a cement post, and stared at it.
The swings moved slightly back and forth at the almost unfelt breeze that stirred the mist. Droplets of water ran down the slide. The swinging rings just rocked slightly in the air current. The seesaw and the spring horses, the jungle gym and the wooden playhouse all sat quietly, damp from the mist.
Surscee closed her eyes, cocking her head slightly, listening for any echoes of happiness gone by.
"I would bring them here to play, once I had soothed their trauma to where they could interact with one another, to the point they could do more than run and scream and claw at themselves," the voice of the gray eyed matron sounded behind Surscee.
The sorceress turned, seeing the darkly clothed matron standing under a tree, barely visible in the fog, lighting a cigarette.
"I recreated it in Hell, just for them. To let them be children again, to remember," her voice said. She took a drag off her cigarette and Surscee saw the stern planes of the smaller woman's face illuminated for a moment. When she exhaled smoke, Surscee could still see her gun-metal gray eyes.
"I set fallen angels to watch over the park with sword of burning sin and tridents of icy treachery," she said, then turned and walked into the mist.
Surscee frowned as the matron vanished into the mist.
She waited a moment, but the other woman was gone.
Surscee moved on, making no sign of effort as she brought up her defenses. Her fingernails twinkled slightly as the microscopic piezoelectric systems came online. The targeting reticles and the HUD elements appeared in her vision. She brought up the passive acoustic mapping and changed the hardness of the heels of her boots so that her boots clicked with each step.
The fog muffled the acoustic map slightly, the water droplets absorbing and redirecting sound, making the map fuzzy here and there.
She passed by a vending machine and smelled cigarette smoke. The onboard systems broke it down for her, putting it up in the tiny window beyond her left hand peripheral vision. No manufacturer signature, no trace elements from other worlds. Her onboards told her that it was Old Earth brand, the tobacco lacking any genetic engineering and the cigarette containing nothing but an asbestos filter, paper, and tobacco. No flavors, no genetic smoothing, no flavor enhancements. No record in the database she always carried loaded.
She frowned slightly.
"You are unmoved by human suffering, making you suitable for this task," a tired sounding man said from just past a set of benches. He was leaning against a fountain. He had shaggy cut dark hair, a simple pair of pants and shirt without decoration, and dark circles under his eyes.
Two steps and the figure vanished.
The echolocation acoustic mapping told her that there was a solid bipedal humaniod form there for a split second but it vanished just when she got in range of it.
Surscee followed the arc of the path, curiosity filling her.
She knew if the being that had manifested as a five meter tall demon with bat wings and a whip of burning warsteel links woven with barbed wire, or the short matron with the nasty steel knife, wanted to kill her, the being simply would.
Surscee was curious what the purpose of this was.
"Enemies never rest. That's why they're called the Enemy, you blithering morons. I swear, dealing with the two of you is like dealing with particularly naive and ignorant children who are shocked, shocked I tell you, that they can't ziptie a plastic bag around their head and dance in the middle of the Interstate during rush hour," the matron's voice was cruel and full of disdain. "Of course millions are dying, that's what happens when you act like atomic weapons are no more dangerous than sparklers."
Surscee didn't bother to look around, her onboard bioware systems letting her know that the point of origin for the voice kept moving and shifting.
A trivial trick with nanites and one she had used often to confuse and harry foes.
"Your weakness disgusts me," the woman's voice hissed from between two food vending machines. "If you spent less time crying and more time fixing the system you'd be done by now, you pathetic puling weakling."
Surscee smiled slightly.
The voice reminded Surscee of her mother mocking her lessers.
There was a small basket with berries and small fruits sitting on a bench and Surscee's smile got wider. She moved over and sat down, picking up the basket and setting it on her lap.
If the being wanted her dead, she would be dead, simple as that.
The berries were blackberries, strawberries, and raspberries. Clean, sweet and tart.
After a moment the matron came walking out of the fog, opening a breast pocket to remove a pack of cigarettes and a flint-steel lighter. The woman sat down, crossing her legs at the knee and smoothing her skirt. She then lit the cigarette, the flare of the lighter lighting her face with the warmth of the flame without making the face seem any warmer.
Surscee slowly chewed a blackberry as the cigarette was lit, puffed on, and the lighter clinked shut. The pack and the lighter went back into the top pocket, the matron's fingers nimbly buttoning up the pocket.
They sat there for a long moment.
"All of that power, all your knowledge and mastery of exotic and esoteric disciplines, and here you sit eating freshly picked berries and fruit," the matron said.
"I am a simple woman who enjoys simple pleasures," Surscee said, smiling.
"I could use someone like you on my team," the matron said, exhaling smoke. "Power, the will to dominate, the means to achieve the goals I set out for you."
"An enticing offer," Surscee said carefully. She picked up strawberry and bit off the tip, chewing slowly.
"With your brother as one of my Hell Knights, you would make an excellent Hell Storm," the matron said.
This time when she exhaled the smoke was tinged with a slight tang hot freshly spilled blood and a taint of brimstone.
"Acting as the agent of the Lady Lord of Hell herself," Surscee said. She picked up a black cherry and looked over it. "Empowered, strengthened, by the Lady Lord of Hell, to punish the wicked for their sins."
The matron nodded slowly.
"With you as the judge, myself as the jury, and my brother as the executioner," Surscee said, still smiling.
"At times," the matron said. She exhaled smoke and glared at the mist that surrounded them. "Do you know what sin mankind has fallen into?"
Surscee shook her head. "Pride, perhaps? My mother often spoke of sloth and gluttony, perhaps that?"
The matron shook her head. "No. Far far worse."
"I would hear your words, fearsome one," Surscee said, making sure her voice was respectful.
"An anecdote," the matron said. She sighed. "Later, in my life, as more and more people became enamored with being ethical, more for status than to be truly ethical, philosophers and those who called themselves ethecists began posing questions, providing answers, each of the seeking to be recognized as the pinnacle of ethics and morals that would guide humanity into a Golden Age."
"That smack of wickedness," Surscee said. "Of pride and arrogance."
The matron nodded. "One question, posed by academics to students, always enraged me. Asked by academics who had never traveled beyond their ivory towers or guarded enclaves, asked to pampered students who had spent their lives dwelling in luxuries beyond imagination to the people of my youth."
The matron reached down into the mist that covered her feet, lifting up a bottle of beer and popping the cap with a talon that immediately returned to a manicured nail.
"The question, put forth, involves a situation. I will explain it thusly: You are at a village in a war torn nation. A warlord arrives with his men, intending on killing the village. The reasons do not matter. However, the warlord makes you an offer, handing you a gun with a single bullet. Shoot one person, of your choice, and he will spare you and the survivors. Kill him, and his men will kill you, and allow the village to survive. Kill none, and he will order his men to kill all the villagers, man, woman, and child, but leave you to live," the matron said.
Surscee frowned. "A terrible choice."
The matron snorted. "The academics and ethical philosophers then asked their students: What is the most moral choice?" the matron looked at Surscee. "Care to make a guess?"
Surscee thought for a long moment. "Shoot one of his men. He did not say you had to kill a villager."
The matron laughed. "A choice fitting for a Great Value Red Sonja," she laughed. She shook her head. "But, you would be wrong. You see, you make the unethical choice to take a human life."
"Then what?" Surscee asked.
"To stand aside. That you do not make a choice. The philosophical correct answer was to stand aside, that the warlord and his men make their own decisions and it is not your responsibility nor your moral failing whatever they choose to do," the matron looked out at the mist, taking a swig of her beer. "Do nothing, let the trolley kill five, because for you to decide who lives and dies is unethical."
Surscee snorted. "Choosing to make no choice is a choice in and of itself. You should always seek to do the least harm and the greatest good."
The matron nodded.
"The cowardice disgusts me," the matron said. She took another swig of her beer and then a drag from her cigarette. She exhaled smoke tinged with blood and brimstone. "I need those who will not back down, who are willing to get in the mud and the blood and the beer to get the job done."
The matron held up a red apple. "Take the apple, accept my offer. Be my Hell Storm to your brother's Hell Knight."
"Your offer humbles me," Surscee said. "It does not matter if my brother took your offer, I am Oathsworn to Lady Nakteti the Traveler. My duty is clear, it lies with my sworn liege."
"But what of your duty to your people?" the matron asked. "What of your duty to humanity?"
"I represent humanity wherever I go. Shall my actions, my decisions, lead the people's of the galaxy to believe that humanity are oath breakers? That our word, our bond, our oath, carries no meaning other than to further our own aims and goals? That we will abandon them, no matter what oaths we swear?"
The matron was silent.
"I am tempted by your offer, but I must, respectfully, refuse," Surscee said.
"Very well," the matron said. She blew on her fingertips and the apple dissolved. She stood up, taking a moment to smooth her skirt and tug the cuffs of her sleeves.
"You would have made an excellent Hell Storm," the matron said, exhaling smoke.
When it cleared, she was gone.
Surscee closed her eyes and heaved a great breath.
"I have passed the test, I hope," she said softly.
Only the dripping of water in the mist answered her.
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transmasc booty short lover here and it is like a million degrees out rn so i want to go out in booty shorts but like...i just got this incredible STP packer from grammas sausages and i love it so much, and i want to have it on my body forever lol. But also I cannot seem to get it right in booty shorts, it looks fine standing but the instant i sit, it pokes forward into the center seam and looks funky/pointy/hard....and I am always seated because I use a wheelchair to get around 😩 I got it to look normal like once so i know it's possible but i'm struggling. does anyone have any tips?? especially if you also have a packer from grammas sausages, which tend to have bigger balls than most packers i feel like (i have the andoilette I think). I don't have the spouti tube in rn because i havent had energy to figure out what length to trim it to and stuff.
anyway anyone have any tips?? pls help lol i love booty shorts 😭 i think the shorter inseam makes it have less holding it down i guess

The year is now 2554…. Humanity had finally received contact from beings other than itself. An extraterrestrial coalition, known as `The Galactic Federation of United Worlds`, made itself known and extended a hand to Earth. After years of communications and exchanges of cultures, humanity was soon formerly known officially as a member of the G.F.U.W.
Our true setting takes place within the confines of a “Interplanetary Customs Registrations” office building of Mars. A human worker, better known as Dan, was busy typing away at a computer. His office was… clean enough to say the least. His desk was littered with papers, empty energy drink cans, and pictures of either family members with him or vacation photos. His room only had his desk of items, a table with a Hasako Industries Instant Food Teleporter and a mini fridge plugged into the wall. It was a somewhat confined space, but the bald Caucasian was fine with all of it. A home away from home if you will.
Suddenly the office phone rung to life to the tune of the currently now popular radio song. The heavy-set man answers with a simple introduction. “I.C.R., this is Dan Hemmingway answering: how may I help you?”
[Dan, this is Rita from Worker Resources.]
The worker took a deep breath and pales a bit. “Hey Rita… what seems to be the problem?”
[We just need you to come into the office. Your paperwork will be sent to someone else. It’s urgent.]
Dan hung up the phone and took another deep breath. He soon got up and began making his way to the Worker Resources room now.
Dan soon reached the door to the place he was dreading. Taking a deep breath, he slowly opened his way into the office. The Human was greeted with the sight of his colleagues sitting in a circle, facing him. "Uh... what did I do wrong?"
Rita, the *Humanoid Octopoda*, gently gave several taps to an empty seat. "Come, have a seat Dan. You're not in trouble whatsoever."
"Alright..." was all he said as he sat down in the somewhat wet seat.
"So, what exactly is going on?"
"Intervention," his male insectoid-cricket workmate said.
Dan was confused by this statement.
"Well, we want to help with your dietary," Rita exclaimed with somewhat positive tones.
If anything, Dan felt insulted. He wasn't eating that badly... was he? The Human stared down at his gut, some of the other occupants of the room tugged at their clothes or fidgeted in their seats to try and push the air of awkwardness off of them. A sapient collection of rocks coughs to get things back on track, staring at Dan with a worried look. "You're eating fine, I think, it's your choice of drinks during working hours."
The Human thought of his drink selection and came to a singular conclusion. "My Monster Energy? What's wrong with what I'm drinking?"
His fellow workers grimaced at this answer.
The collection of stones, named Mida, spoke up. "Dan... we care about you. We're here for you..."
"Wait what?"
Rita brought out a pamphlet of drinks she would recommend. "We have several Nudani alternatives for your health!"
"What does-"
The Insectoid-Cricket, named... Paul, spoke up now. "I can have someone come and guide you on certain medicines of my people. They can-"
"STOP," the human office worker yelled out. "Can... Can anyone tell me what the hell this is going?!"
Rita was silent, but eventually spoke up. "We're here to talk about your addiction. Your caffeine addiction. The one concerning... Monster Energy and the likes..."
Dan was both relieved... yet confused. "OH! Wait why does that matter?"
The Worker Resource Worker whips out some papers to show. "Dan! Don't you know the consequences of using said drinks constantly?!"
"No."
"There's many health side effects to them! Such as..."
The Female Cephalopod begins showing statistics and displays. "Kidney stones, stunted growth, and many more! Dan it's my job to worry about the safety and health of all of our workers."
The human gave a soft smile to them and tried reassuring them. "Guys I'm fine really. I've been doing this for many years, and I have yet to miss a week or even a day of work. There's a reason why I'm employee of the month multiple times."
"*Yeah, you don't need to flaunt it*," Paul commented under his breath.
"So, if this was it... I got to pee."
Before she could finish giving more of her facts and logical statements, Dan left the room and hurried to the bathroom. Rita sighs sadly and looks to Paul. "Do I worry too much about the human?"
The Cricket man was on his phone checking his gacha games. "I'm gonna bet not enough in about..."
A scream echoed throughout the office, seemingly originating from the male restrooms. A feline-humanoid worker jumped and clutched their nails into the ceiling. Rita runs off to check on Dan while Paul grumbles. "I'll call my brother-in-law..."
​
If there were any lessons for this short story it's this: drink lots of water and moderate your drinking of energy drinks and the likes... or you'll be like Dan and find out how bad kidney stones are.