Cast iron griswold

Cast Iron Cookware

2010.12.28 21:44 NoMoreNicksLeft Cast Iron Cookware

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2020.07.14 07:22 LockMarine CastIronRestoration

Everything you need to know about maintaining and restoring cast iron cookware.
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2011.08.05 10:33 humanman42 Thrift Store Hauls : What did you find today?

A forum dedicated to sharing your thrift finds - garage sales, flea markets, pawn shops, and more are all allowed. Come join our community and share your passion for the hunt with like minded people!
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2023.06.03 22:49 Dexushun32 20 part magic item based on Sung Jinwoo

Quick context: My friend who is new to dnd but have done some playing, asked me to create a character for him based of sung jinwoo from solo leveling. I said its going to be hard because while sung jinwoo controlling a millions of shadow soldiers in dnd you mostly can contorl like 20 in combat, then he said then do something and my adhd head started create the character(wizard) and this magic item that more likely a class in its self.
So this what i made its kinda like the beta version of it because its still missing stat blocks, etc.
So here it is:
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Seals of a Forgotten God
Category: Wondrous Item (Tattoo), Multipart magic item
Item Rarity: Artifact (Growing)
Attunement: To use the seals you need attune to it. Its takes up to 3 attunement slots(or 2 if the dm allow it)
--------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------
Growing magic item lvl:
1 seal = 1 lvl
5 seal's = 5 lvl
10 seal's = 10 lvl
15 seal's = 15 lvl
20 seal's = 20 lvl
--------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------
Major Seals:
  1. Seal of The Loyal Knight (Igris) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d10+con modifieper lvl / Ruler's Touch
  2. Seal of The Singing Zodaic (Tusk) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d6+con modifieper lvl / Hymn of the 12 zodaic
  3. Seal of The Craving King (Beru) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d12+con modifieper lvl / Gluttony
  4. Seal of The Snow Beast/Guardian (Tank / Snow Elf) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d12+con modifier or 1d8+con modifieper lvl / Guardian of the snow forest or Arrows of Hailstorm
  5. Seal of The Iron Blooded Shield (Iron) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d12+con modifieper lvl / Shield of Aegis
  6. Seal of The Rising Dragon (Kaisel) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d20+con modifieper lvl / Dragons Breath
--------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------
Major Seals are holds the most powerful abilities, and servants of the forgotten god:
Each Major seal have 5 charges.
Charges regained on short rest, long rest, expanding a spell slot (if the character have spell slots), and at a new day's dawn
Short rest = 1 charge
Long rest = 3 charges
Charges can be used for:
5 shadow soldier summon = 1 charge
1 special summon = 2 charge
1 feature = 3 charge
Each Major Seal have special summons, each special has is own stat block and abilites.
Special summons have conciseness and there own personality.
Every special summon have regenetive ability to regain hp. You can expand 1 charge of the seal or spell slots to regain 2d4+2. If you expand more charges or spell slots(maximum 4 times).
1 charge/spell slot = 2d4+2
2 charge/spell slot = 4d4+4
3 charge/spell slot = 8d4+8
4 charge/spell slot = 10d4+10
Each Major Seals also give the user ability. Example like Seal of the Loyal Knight gives mage hand cantrip and you can cast it at will without verbal or somatic components and without expanding as spell slot, and you can make the spectral hand invisible. Also lets you use it as a bonus action to shove one creature you can see within 30 feet of you. When you do so, the target must succeed on a Strength saving throw (DC 8 + your proficiency bonus + the highest ability score) or be moved 5 feet toward or away from you. A creature can willingly fail this save.
--------------------------------------------------

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Minor Seals:
  1. Seal of Unseen veil (Stealth / Invisbility) / 5 charges
  2. Seal of Storm Alacrity (+1 / +2 / +3 dex) / +10 movment speed / extra attack at lvl 10 or 15 / dash action as bonus action
  3. Seal of Knight (+1 / +2 / +3 str) / profiency with martial weapon's / When making an attack with a weapon, you use your highest stat modifier for the attack and damage rolls.
  4. Seal of Fortitude (+1 / +2 / +3 con) / hit die change to d10 if it was d10 then to d12 / +2 hp per lvl up
  5. Seal of Space (Invertory / Bag of holding) / at 5 lvl normal bag of holding / at lvl 10 double size of a normal bag of holding) /at 15 lvl triple size of a normal bag of holding
  6. Seal of Protection (Armor Creation / Mage Armor) / 5 charges / profiency to light, medium, and heavy armor's / Mage armor at will without expending spell slot / Reaction can be used expend 1 spell slot to cast Shield
  7. Seal of Venom Blade (Kasaka's Venom fang) / 3 charges / 1 dagger / can be arcane focus
  8. Seal of Knight's Bane (Knight slayer) / 3 charges / 1 dagger / can be arcane focus
  9. Seal of Presence (Bloodlust / Dragon's Fear) / 5 charges / 15 lvl Bloodlust change's to Dragon's Fear
  10. Seal of Dual Demons (Demon King's Longsword and daggers) / 3 charges / 1 long sword, 2 dagger's / can be arcane focus
  11. Seal of Dragon Fangs (Kamish's Wrath) / 3 charges / 2 dagger's / can be arcane focus
  12. Seal of Poison Purge (Detoxification) / Resistance to Poison and Acid damage
  13. Seal of Dancer's Sword (Cha Hae-In sword) / 3 charge / saber = rapier / can be arcane focus
  14. Seal of Frost Axe / Snowfall Bow (Cold damage weapon) / 3 charges / 1 axe or 1 bow / can be arcane focus
--------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------
Minor Seals are lesser power, abilities, and weapons of the forgotten god.
Minor Seals charges varies between 3 and 5 charges.
Weapons have 3 charges and can use spell slots
Abilities have 5 charges
Charges regained as Major seals regain there charges
Weapons can be summoned at will by the user(and others if they're attuned to the physical form of the weapon, or to servants). Seal that give weapon to the user those weapon can be attuned to others as well if the user allows it. When others attune to a weapon they gain the ability to summon it and use the weapon with the abilities the weapon has, but if the user summon the weapon first or the weapon is already summoned then the weapon goes to the user
Weapons can be wielded by others(or servants) if the user willing to. Weapons can't damage the user. If the user drops the weapons then the weapon disappear into the Seal of Space even if the user doesn't have the Seal of Space.
Every weapon have 1 ability or more. Each ability expand 1 charge or 1 spell slot
--------------------------------------------------
I also posted this in DnDHomebrew so if you see it there and wonder why the quick context is a little different.
Also im going to make this into a homebrew class because of that one comment it hit the motivation button so yeaaa when im finished with that im going to post it here
sooo bye next time
submitted by Dexushun32 to UnearthedArcana [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 22:28 patch-mangoes The Ironic Similarities Between Ai and Kana (Part 2)

Yes! This is a Part Two. There are some few things I had missed in my first post so consider this as a continuation. This post will also further cement Ai and Kana's similarities between each other as I will try to go into much more details than last time.

Warning: REALLY long post ahead

If you haven't read the first part, I highly suggest you do so. It would make much more sense because of the initial contexts I already provided in there.

I'll be once again referencing some lyrics from YOASOBI's song called Idol. And let me just add, that aside from Hoshino Ai and Arima Kana, I will also be mentioning Katayose Yura. (I also have a little theory towards the end of this thread.)

Without further delay, let's start with the new list:

Panda (Kana/Yura)

One refused to be the lesser panda and the other one refused to be a panda who merely attracts customers.

https://preview.redd.it/il78yajzxu3b1.jpg?width=1587&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=74f559196b4f39eef9b57aa426a666d239ed0dc0

Choice of Style (Kana/Yura)

Berets and hats are pretty much Kana's signature style all throughout the series.
Processing img twv5m9l0gu3b1...
Then Yura was introduced wearing a hat and died beside her hat.
https://preview.redd.it/69uz7lvkgu3b1.jpg?width=1587&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fda7e880cf791cd1419cc1935cf2e1f831fe5872

Breakdown During Concert (Ai/Kana)

To the person who pointed this out in my previous post, thank you!

Both Ai and Kana were seen to be having an emotional breakdown as to who they are during their performance. Ai saying she is a person made up of lies whilst Kana struggles to make everyone look at the "current" her and not her past glory. Their negative train of thoughts were both cut off because of the wotageis.
https://preview.redd.it/j4b77sfqgu3b1.jpg?width=1103&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=46ceca5cd10b460b163243b34e7d7e3cbd5836af
https://preview.redd.it/d54w7qhsgu3b1.jpg?width=1112&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=963ff6289f5b864e5df40a34f83e263290e61ccd

The Sun (Ai/Kana)

Whenever Ai or Kana smile, the people around them are reminded of how bright the Sun is.

It is confirmed that Kana represents the Sun. A bona fide star who illuminates on others when she unleashes her potential.
https://preview.redd.it/wjla2lomzu3b1.jpg?width=1587&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=810b0fd9133abf4be8baedf158e2e2db6ef3cd62

Ai was initially portrayed as the Sun.
https://preview.redd.it/x7szfmasiu3b1.png?width=1095&format=png&auto=webp&s=f04c11711238dee29cde73aa397ba95599a6dc78

First picture is Ai and the evening star, second picture is the star from the opening song with the lyrics playing, \"Ichibanboshi no umarekawari\" and the last picture is an actual image of the planet Venus.
But Ai ended up becoming Venus instead; a bright planet who fools people into thinking they are a star.

「一番星の生まれ変わり」– A line from Idol by YOASOBI.
TL: You’re the reincarnation of the Evening Star / A reincarnation of Venus (First Star)

I already explained this in my previous post but Ai wanted to be someone who's capable of love and feeling loved. One of her biggest fear is not being certain if she loves her twins or not. Only then to find out that she indeed loved her kids until her dying breath.

In the eastern part of the world, Venus appears first before the Sun.

"The Real Deals" (Ai/Kana/Yura)

Kana was the first one to mention that Ai is the real deal.
https://preview.redd.it/fyz0wdxhlu3b1.jpg?width=669&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a9879d8ef4e85858c7085b8c6deaa385e73a1194

Now we get Kaburagi wondering if Kana is the real deal.
https://preview.redd.it/t4w7s5ajlu3b1.jpg?width=1252&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d380f4275d44d09277356e588415abf9874ce4e6

Next we got Kamiki Hikaru stating that Katayose Yura is the real deal.
https://preview.redd.it/7bl8qdnklu3b1.jpg?width=1335&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=66185572d81ce28a684d1a0ae188f8d771cd993c

Their Types (Ai/Kana)

This one is a little vague on Ai's part. In Akasaka Aka's short story, 45510, fans kept asking what type of guy does Ai likes.

Ai answered that she can't stand someone who easily gets bothered and mad at her for every little thing because she's someone who messes up a lot and people would get tired of her because of it.

Ai explicitly said that she prefers someone who doesn't mind her. She also stated that affection comes from trust but she unfortunately doesn't know what falling in love feels like.

I'd like to put the focus on Aqua who is Kana's crush. If we analyze his relationship with Kana, he really put up with her and it's evidently undisputable in the manga.


And lastly, putting up with Kana's scandal.
Which he did things behind their backs, never brought the supposedly Kana Scandal up to Kana, never talked about it to Kana, never called her out for it, and never scolded her for it despite what she did being dangerous.
https://preview.redd.it/3puu4pcdmu3b1.jpg?width=1293&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=efce8de0dd31dec4bf82d64f4bfd3d7f72cd7eac

Their Names (Ai/Kana)

I'd like to thank the Japanese comment I've read for explaining this one. This will mostly likely be the one to tie every Ai and Kana's parallels.

I'll try to explain it as clear as I can.

星野アイ (Hoshino Ai)
有馬かな (Arima Kana)

With Ai's name being in Katakana and Kana's name being in Hiragana, both names, if put into Kanji, give us a ton of possible meanings and multiple readings.

Ai's name in Kanji of 'love' is 愛 (Ai). But did you know that 'love' in Japanese can also be read as 愛し (Kanashi)? The character 愛 (Ai) is also read as かな (kana) at times.

Another thing, if we read Ai's name as the Kanji of grief 哀 (Ai) we also get 哀しい (Kanashii) which means sorrowful, although people usually use 悲しい (kanashii) to express sorrow.

Bringing up that particular line again from Idol by YOASOBI.

「歌い踊り舞う私はマリア」

"I sing and dance around, look at me, I'm Maria" – A line that seemingly refers to Ai because of the Virgin Mary-like representation of hers. But if we oppositely read it in Japanese syllables, Ma-ri-a is read as A-ri-ma (マリア → アリマ)

Basically it's this: Maria Ai → Arima Ai (Kana)


Let's not forget that Aqua and Ruby's dad's name is Kamiki Hikaru. It's worth noting because of Kana's depiction as the light 光 (hikari) in this series.


TO ADD MORE:

Akane's Inspirations

https://preview.redd.it/qgub9nrdnu3b1.jpg?width=1587&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f484f0f2d0c31fdd97489b94ab5828d4883503b4
Kana and Ai were the people that Akane took inspiration from. It's quite interesting that out of all the celebrities in the world of Oshi no Ko, she picked the two of them. Kana when she was younger and Ai as of currently.

Aqua's Barter

We all know that Aqua sacrificed Ai's secret and reputation to save Kana's. With Ai being the reason for his revenge and Kana being the fuel to drive his revenge.

He was able to:


THEORY:
Role of Ai

Ruby's current mindset won't allow her to properly convey Ai as a person. Her idea of mothers are still very much "immature," in a way that she's still projecting her life as Sarina, who was probably waiting for her mom to come back. Unless she does a 180 and suddenly accepts the fact that not all moms are loving and caring to their child.

Ruby has a perfected image of Ai ever since she was still Sarina. It took her quite awhile to understand that the idol industry is not always sunshine and rainbows. She has idolized Ai long before she was even Ruby and so far, the only flaw she had seen from her mother, Ai, was that she was a liar.

This is honestly just a preference, but I also wanna point it out. If they're also going to be re-enacting a part of Ai's love life, it's highly possible that either of the Hoshino guys (Aqua or Taiki) play Hikaru. And when we end up with either of those, won't it be kind of weird if Ruby plays Ai...?
https://preview.redd.it/kfgvzp7vou3b1.jpg?width=2245&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c6c14856b9e1ebc7627d930a14cc8d65b02f5cd0
I mean no offense to those people who are into that genre but these are siblings who treat each other as family canonly.

Not to mention they're also going to have to play their mother and father's roles. Unless they assign the role to Melt or add new additional characters that would play as Hikaru. Although, I seriously doubt the role of Hikaru will be given that easily to someone.
So it's either:


If you do think about it carefully, Ruby taking on the role of the B-Komachi member whose perspective was seen in 45510 or the B-Komachi member who harassed Ai may actually give her a rather different perspective on how she views her mother.

To add, if you take a look at the B-Komachi member who's wearing the Panda pin, she has a fairly but not exactly, similar hairstyle as Ai.
https://preview.redd.it/rquflfxivu3b1.jpg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cb801c6c66658309d03785cc972769606aa6c80f

So it may be a bit unlikely and could easily be debunked any time a new chapter drops, but we can't entirely rule out the possibility of Kana playing the role of Ai.

Kana can definitely pull off an "Ai." The differences are going to be her eyes and her "star power."

Long haired Kana by Yokoyari Mengo (Manga Illustrator)

They are about to film the real Ai. Someone who was willing to show, for the first time, her past and her vulnerabilities.

It is a little unfortunate that Gotanda is more on after promoting the image of "Ai." Which Ai didn't want.
https://preview.redd.it/xfc3zcab3v3b1.jpg?width=1587&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bc486f72fae94cbdd46a1a3b685ee0aba859a4d3

Plus, Ai being stabbed by a stalker has the same dynamic as Kana playing the heroine and almost being stabbed by the stalker which was Aqua in the Sweet Today arc. Top that with concerning interview with Kana that includes another stabbing reference.

https://preview.redd.it/tvrt4rjg3v3b1.jpg?width=1587&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ffb05b9ab0f7d94611ac9dcc659ff95321e96a17

And Kaburagi wondering about Arima Kana being the real deal in which up until now, we still don't know what he meant.
https://preview.redd.it/3pbczb66wu3b1.jpg?width=1252&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f5d5c5bee8073b9ae53da952395458d29553e0a

Moreover, remember when Kaburagi himself contacted the manager of SA Entertainment to cast Katayose Yura?
https://preview.redd.it/gla6ayxbwu3b1.jpg?width=1339&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=410d5730265583064b8be57b08ef487606f83b90
And Yura's declaration of not just being a Panda who only attracts customers?

Yura was supposed to play the role of Ai if it weren't for Kamiki Hikaru intervening.

Maybe it's just me, but Kana and Ai's looks and personalities are a red herring in itself. The similarities between them are getting more uncanny each and every time we get new information.

Which leaves us with the question... What will happen if Kamiki Hikaru got his hands on an actual star, whose performance shines brightly like the sun itself?



That's all I have for now. Remember, I'm simply here to share some insights about what me and the other fans have noticed between the two.

Please be kind and respectful in the comments. Also, please stay on topic. Thank you and I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this!

What are your thoughts on this?
submitted by patch-mangoes to OshiNoKo [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 21:58 zzsnorgzz I love cast iron and steak.

I love cast iron and steak. submitted by zzsnorgzz to steak [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 21:56 Prolong_Zedong Todays yard sale find $30 how’d I do?

Todays yard sale find $30 how’d I do? submitted by Prolong_Zedong to castiron [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 21:55 Plus-Waltz-3323 Cast iron focaccia banger!

Cast iron focaccia banger! submitted by Plus-Waltz-3323 to Pizza [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 21:23 Important_Tension726 Identifying help

Identifying help
I got this pan today and I find it to be the cutest thing while it’s not cast-iron. I am wondering if anyone could tell me about it, age, value etc. I found one somewhere online. Did not get any value idea or info, it was blocked. I think it might be tin.
submitted by Important_Tension726 to castiron [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 21:16 skamokawakris Wife wanted a steak at midnight.... Cast Iron to the rescue XD

Wife wanted a steak at midnight.... Cast Iron to the rescue XD submitted by skamokawakris to steak [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 21:06 peachberrybloom Got burned at work from avoidable situation

I am a dishwasher and I burned the skin of the tip of two of my fingers at work today. The MANAGER put a scalding hot cast iron pan into the dish bin. They are supposed to bring hot items straight to the sink and announce that they are hot. He was too lazy to do that, so instead I ended up burnt. Luckily, the burn isn’t too awful - really just the top layer of skin is affected, 1st degree. I’m just pissed as this was avoidable and I could’ve burned my finger down to the bone on that thing.
If the injury is not bad enough for workers comp, what can I do? I’m so furious that laziness could’ve made me lost a finger today, but I don’t know what my options are.
submitted by peachberrybloom to Advice [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 20:51 Ghostwolfking Mard Geer vs Gildarts [Discussion]

Mard Geer vs Gildarts [Discussion]
Location: Tenrou Island
50 feet away facing each other
Both have no idea about the other abilities
The fighter’s
Mard Geer
Personality
Often seen smirking, Mard Geer is a cool, collected, yet arrogant man who plays himself off as being extremely intelligent; he quite regularly refers to himself in the third person.[7] Also, much like the rest of his kind, Mard Geer belittles humans,[8] and thinks of them as nothing more than insects. Indeed, he finds the mere thought of letting a human live when given the chance to kill them a tragedy, and is not above torturing his subordinates when they cause him any sort of inconvenience (ironically, not much later, he begins to understand, after fighting Sting and Rogue, that toying with humans can be quite enjoyable, as he ultimately finds their ignorance and belief in things such as hope incredibly amusing).[9] Additionally, Mard Geer takes great pride in being one of Zeref's Etherious; he also has a habit of referring to Cube as his "garden," and appears to love it enough to make Fairy Tail pay for bringing harm to it, even though he noted that ultimately, it didn't matter in the slightest.[10] However, after many outsiders intruded and Cube was destroyed, Mard Geer began to feel, for the first time in years, anger, an emotion he expressed himself to have forgotten long ago.[11]
Mard Geer is also rather intolerant of human emotions, having decided to kill his for the sake of putting his intellectual side first. He also cares a great deal for E.N.D.'s safety whilst in book form, setting his tome down before proceeding to unleash his fury against Natsu and the Twin Dragons, as he was unsure of what his rage would do to the book.[12] When throwing away his calm nature, Mard Geer's arrogance grows in leaps and bounds, as after he emerged unscathed from a full-scale assault from his Dragon Slayer opponents, he merely sat upon his throne and goaded them by saying that he has yet to use his Etherious Form, as well as that they should give up.[13] Though when variables that he did not predict come into his equation, such as Gray receiving Silver's Ice Devil Slayer powers, even he can lose his composure and exhibit shock and awe.
Ability
Thorn Curse (荊の呪法 Ibara no Jūhō): A Curse of Mard Geer's which allows him to create a series of thorny rose vines, the Curse can be used as a means of "punishment" for those who cause inconvenience to Mard Geer, as the vines wrap around the target extremely tight, digging the thorns rather deep into their body.[53] Furthermore, through this Curse Mard Geer is able to use his Curse Power in various ways, such as a thorn-imbibed shield[54] or rose-shaped explosion,[55] and grow flowers to attack opponents.
Gildarts
Personality
Gildarts is a laid-back, kind and easygoing person who has great interest and the utmost faith in the new generation of Fairy Tail's Mages. He is rather oblivious, and doesn't pay much attention to his surroundings, as he recognized neither the guild nor Mirajane. He also has a tendency to break through walls with his Crush in order to pass, rather than simply using a door,[8] something which prompted the inhabitants of Magnolia to create the town's rearranging process.
Gildarts is, as pointed out by himself, rather bad at holding back during a fight, though he fights in a particular way, so as to prevent human casualties.
Ability’s
Crush (粉砕クラッシュ Kurasshu): Gildarts' signature Magic, Crush is an extremely powerful Caster Magic that smashes everything the user comes into contact with into pieces. It can be used to both crack Magic into pieces, thereby nullifying its effects, as well as to reduce the Magic's power and to deflect it. Even the most powerful spells are rendered useless when faced with this destructive and advanced Magic, which is difficult to control even for an extremely powerful individual like Gildarts himself. The effects of Crush occasionally manifest themselves as the target being separated into cubes; interestingly, should Crush be directly cast on another living organism, the recipient is separated into numerous, doll-like versions of themselves. After some time, the target should revert to their original form, but should Gildarts wish, he can manually change them back.
submitted by Ghostwolfking to fairytail [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 20:44 Dexushun32 A 20 part magic item based of Sung Jinwoo

Quick Contex: One of my friend new to dnd and wants to play as Sung Jinwoo from solo leveling. He asked me to help with his character soo my adhd head started making a character with a magic item that has 20 diffirent parts that he gains through the campaign.
And this have so far:
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Seals of a Forgotten God
Category: Wondrous Item (Tattoo), Multipart magic item
Item Rarity: Artifact (Growing)
Attunement: To use the seals you need attune to it. Its takes up to 3 attunement slots(or 2 if the dm allow it)
--------------------------------------------------

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Growing magic item lvl:
1 seal = 1 lvl
5 seal's = 5 lvl
10 seal's = 10 lvl
15 seal's = 15 lvl
20 seal's = 20 lvl
--------------------------------------------------

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Major Seals:
  1. Seal of The Loyal Knight (Igris) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d10+con modifieper lvl / Ruler's Touch
  2. Seal of The Singing Zodaic (Tusk) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d6+con modifieper lvl / Hymn of the 12 zodaic
  3. Seal of The Craving King (Beru) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d12+con modifieper lvl / Gluttony
  4. Seal of The Snow Beast/Guardian (Tank / Snow Elf) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d12+con modifier or 1d8+con modifieper lvl / Guardian of the snow forest or Arrows of Hailstorm
  5. Seal of The Iron Blooded Shield (Iron) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d12+con modifieper lvl / Shield of Aegis
  6. Seal of The Rising Dragon (Kaisel) / 5 charges / hit points: 1d20+con modifieper lvl / Dragon Breath
--------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------
Major Seals are holds the most powerful abilities, and servants of the forgotten god:
Each Major seal have 5 charges.
Charges regained on short rest, long rest, expanding a spell slot (if the character have spell slots), and at a new day's dawn
Short rest = 1 charge
Long rest = 3 charges
Charges can be used for:
5 shadow soldier summon = 1 charge
1 special summon = 2 charge
1 feature = 3 charge
Each Major Seal have special summons, each special has is own stat block and abilites.
Special summons have conciseness and there own personality.
Every special summon have regenetive ability to regain hp. You can expand 1 charge of the seal or spell slots to regain 2d4+2. If you expand more charges or spell slots(maximum 4 times).
1 charge/spell slot = 2d4+2
2 charge/spell slot = 4d4+4
3 charge/spell slot = 8d4+8
4 charge/spell slot = 10d4+10
Each Major Seals also give the user ability. Example like Seal of the Loyal Knight gives mage hand cantrip and you can cast it at will without verbal or somatic components and without expanding as spell slot, and you can make the spectral hand invisible. Also lets you use it as a bonus action to shove one creature you can see within 30 feet of you. When you do so, the target must succeed on a Strength saving throw (DC 8 + your proficiency bonus + the highest ability score) or be moved 5 feet toward or away from you. A creature can willingly fail this save.
--------------------------------------------------

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Minor Seals:
  1. Seal of Unseen veil (Stealth / Invisbility) / 5 charges
  2. Seal of Storm Alacrity (+1 / +2 / +3 dex) / +10 movment speed / extra attack at lvl 10 or 15 / dash action as bonus action
  3. Seal of Knight (+1 / +2 / +3 str) / profiency with martial weapon's / When making an attack with a weapon, you use your highest stat modifier for the attack and damage rolls.
  4. Seal of Fortitude (+1 / +2 / +3 con) / hit die change to d10 if it was d10 then to d12 / +2 hp per lvl up
  5. Seal of Space (Invertory / Bag of holding) / at 5 lvl normal bag of holding / at lvl 10 double size of a normal bag of holding) /at 15 lvl triple size of a normal bag of holding
  6. Seal of Protection (Armor Creation / Mage Armor) / 5 charges / profiency to light, medium, and heavy armor's / Mage armor at will without expending spell slot / Reaction can be used expend 1 spell slot to cast Shield
  7. Seal of Venom Blade (Kasaka's Venom fang) / 3 charges / 1 dagger / can be arcane focus
  8. Seal of Knight's Bane (Knight slayer) / 3 charges / 1 dagger / can be arcane focus
  9. Seal of Presence (Bloodlust / Dragon's Fear) / 5 charges / 15 lvl Bloodlust change's to Dragon's Fear
  10. Seal of Dual Demons (Demon King's Longsword and daggers) / 3 charges / 1 long sword, 2 dagger's / can be arcane focus
  11. Seal of Dragon Fangs (Kamish's Wrath) / 3 charges / 2 dagger's / can be arcane focus
  12. Seal of Poison Purge (Detoxification) / Resistance to Poison and Acid damage
  13. Seal of Dancer's Sword (Cha Hae-In sword) / 3 charge / saber = rapier / can be arcane focus
  14. Seal of Frost Axe / Snowfall Bow (Cold damage weapon) / 3 charges / 1 axe or 1 bow / can be arcane focus
--------------------------------------------------

--------------------------------------------------
Minor Seals are lesser power, abilities, and weapons of the forgotten god.
Minor Seals charges varies between 3 and 5 charges.
Weapons have 3 charges and can use spell slots
Abilities have 5 charges
Charges regained as Major seals regain there charges
Weapons can be summoned at will by the user(and others if they're attuned to the physical form of the weapon, or to servants). Seal that give weapon to the user those weapon can be attuned to others as well if the user allows it. When others attune to a weapon they gain the ability to summon it and use the weapon with the abilities the weapon has, but if the user summon the weapon first or the weapon is already summoned then the weapon goes to the user
Weapons can't damage the user. If the user drops the weapons then the weapon disappear into the Seal of Space even if the user doesn't have the Seal of Space.
Every weapon have 1 ability or more. Each ability expand 1 charge or 1 spell slot
--------------------------------------------------
submitted by Dexushun32 to DnDHomebrew [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 20:17 AutoModerator Here's To Watch Book Club: The Next Chapter Online For Free REDDiT

The Book Club: The Next Chapter is a group of book-loving friends who gather online to discuss their latest reads. They are a supportive and friendly bunch, and they are always happy to welcome new members to their club. The Book Club: The Next Chapter is free to join, and you can participate in as many or as few discussions as you like. You can also choose to receive notifications when new discussions are started, or when new books are added to the club’s library. If you love to read, and you’re looking for a supportive and friendly community of book-lovers, then the Book Club: The Next Chapter is the perfect place for you.
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The four women from the original Book Club movie (Diane Keaton, Jane Fonda, Candice Bergen, and Mary Steenburgen) are back, and this time they’re joined by new member, Vivian (Jennifer Coolidge). The ladies continue their book club, bonding over the novels they read, but they also tackle some of the big changes that have happened in their lives since the last film. Diane’s daughter has gotten married and she’s now a grandmother, Vivian has become a successful author, Jane is still dealing with the death of her husband, and Candice is trying to come to terms with her ex-husband’s new relationship. The women support each other through these changes, and continue to find joy in their book club meetings. In the end, the ladies all agree that book club is the best way to stay connected to each other and to the things they love.
More Details on Focus Features Studios’ “Book Club: The Next Chapter”
Moviegoers who enjoyed 2017’s sleeper hit “Book Club” will be excited to hear that Focus Features is working on a sequel. Entitled “Book Club: The Next Chapter,” the film will once again follow the adventures of four friends who meet regularly to discuss a chosen book. While the first film focused on the friends reading “50 Shades of Grey,” it is not yet known what book will be the focus of the sequel. However, given the title, it is likely that the second film will see the friends branching out and exploring different genres. It is also not yet known which members of the cast will return for the sequel. However, it is safe to assume that Diane Keaton, Jane Fonda, Candice Bergen, and Mary Steenburgen will all reprise their roles. With the film currently in development, there is no release date set for “Book Club: The Next Chapter.” However, given the success of the first film, it is likely that the sequel will be released sometime in the next few years. In the meantime, fans of the first film can rewatch it online or on DVD. They can also look forward to the release of the soundtrack, which will be available on August 10, 2018.
What are the connections to the bigger MCU in Book Club: The Next Chapter?
The next chapter in the book club is set to explore the connections to the Marvel Cinematic Universe. In the first installment, we saw how the ladies read and discuss the first book in the MCU, the “Avengers”. In the second installment, they will be reading and discussing the second book in the MCU, “Iron Man”. We can expect to see more of the ladies’ explorations of the other books in the MCU as they discuss theplot and try to find connections to their own lives. It will be interesting to see how they apply what they’ve learned from the first book to the second and if they can find any common ground between the two stories. We can also expect to see the ladies continue to grow and bond with each other as they discuss these books. They have already formed a strong bond and it will be interesting to see how they grow closer to each other as they discuss these common interests. It will be exciting to see what the book club discusses next and how their discussions will connect to the larger MCU.
Is Guardians of Book Club: The Next Chapter the end of the line for the team?
With the release of Guardians of Book Club: The Next Chapter, many are wondering if this is the end of the line for the team. While the movie does provide some closure, it also leaves the door open for more adventures. It is clear that the team has been through a lot over the course of the film. They have lost members, and they have had to face some of their biggest fears. However, they have also come out stronger than ever. They have found new members and they have learned to trust each other. In the end, it is up to the team to decide if they want to continue on or not. They have the option to disband, but they also have the option to continue fighting for the good of the galaxy. Whichever decision they make, it is clear that they have made a lasting impact on the universe.
It’s difficult to say when the sequel to Guardians of the Book Club: The Next Chapter will be released. The first movie was released in May of 2018, and it’s hard to say how long it will take for the second movie to come out. However, it’s likely that the sequel will be released sometime in 2020. until then, fans of the first movie will have to wait patiently for the next installment.
Where to Watch Marvel Studios’ “Book Club: The Next Chapter” Online for FREE?
As the book club members continue their journey through life together, they find themselves bonding over more than just their love of reading. In the sequel to the 2016 film, Book Club, the ladies find themselves exploring new love interests, careers, and friendships. While their personal lives may be changing, one thing remains the same: their book club is still their one constant. Marvel Studios’ Book Club: The Next Chapter picks up a few years after the events of the first film. The ladies are now in their 50s and 60s, but they’re still just as close as ever. When one of the members, Diane (Diane Keaton), is widowed, the others rally around her to help her through the grieving process. They do this by attending a seminar on love and relationships, which leads to them exploring the world of online dating. While the ladies are exploring their personal lives, they’re also still keeping up with their book club. They read everything from classics to bestsellers, and they’re always eager to discuss the latest book they’ve read. If you’re a fan of the first film, then you’ll definitely want to watch the sequel. The film is just as heartwarming and charming as the first, and it’s sure to leave you wanting more. Luckily, there are plenty of ways to watch Marvel Studios’ Book Club: The Next Chapter online for free. The film is available to stream on a variety of platforms, including Amazon Prime Video, YouTube, and Google Play. You can also rent or purchase the film through these platforms, or you can buy the DVD from a variety of retailers.
Conclusion
The Book Club: The Next Chapter online free movie ends with the ladies continuing their book club and enjoying life. They read different books, but also laughed and cried together. The movie was heartwarming and showed that even though life changes, friendships can last forever.
It’s official – “Book Club: The Next Chapter” is coming to a screen near you! Whether you watch it for free online or catch it in theaters, be sure to check out this much-anticipated sequel. And who knows – maybe you’ll even start your own book club once you see how much fun it can be!
submitted by AutoModerator to BookclubFrehd [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 19:56 Melancholy_girl3 [Kane Chronicles] About Sadie Kane's previous portrayals and possible casting for the movie.

I just completed a 3 day reddit ban for harrassment and bullying.
The admins apparently believe that responding a little to a racist who is spamming paragraphs and blocking them is bullying and harrassment.
So naturally I return to talk about racial issues.
000
With the announcement of live action Kane Chronicles movies, there has been discourse about casting, particularly: Sadie Kane.
The biracial co-protagonist of KC.
Sadie is described as having:
Blue eyes
Light skin
Straight caramel coloured hair
Looking like Annabeth
000
Basically, passing for white.
And this is how she was portrayed in fan art and official art for a while, until recently.
"Sadie Kane is mixed so she should be portrayed as mixed" they say, while showing off an unambiguously black girl.
White passing in media
White passing characters have long been used for what I call "comfortable diversity", say for example you've got this new Asian character as a response to asks for diversity, "finally, a character that looks like m-", they're also half white so now they look unambiguously white.
...
In live action, there are examples where a biracial actor was cast originally but scrapped for a white one.
The amount of times this has happened is enough to leave a burn for sure and an overall distaste for white passing mixed race characters.
Does KC have this issue?
The other protagonist is, as you know, Carter Kane.
His description:
Dark skin
Brown eyes
Kinky hair
000
So we have an unambiguously black looking protagonist.
As a black girl, I must say KC does a fair job at representing racial issues.
Iirc, there are moments where Carter is treate like an aggresive black man and Sadie like an innocent white girl despite them being like two years apart.
Sadie's appearance also represents how she feels disconnected from her brother and father amongst other things.
It's not really an excuse to not add diversity, considering there are other poc characters.
White passing doesn't mean white
People misunderstand white passing to mean totally looks white when that's not true.
Sofia Richie is white passing, but you can still see her black features.
Same goes for Natasha Trethewey and Lena Horne.
There's this girl at my old school that looked pretty much white with her pale skin, green eyes and light brown hair, except for her 4c hair of course.
How Sadie should be portrayed in the new film
Sadie must be portrayed by a biracial/mixed actress.
If Sofia Richie was ten years younger, I would hand the role to her (caramel hair, light eyes, white passing).
How I envison Sadie is this:
Tan (Annabeth has a deep tan)
Nose and lips that are juuuust wide enough to not cast suspicion
Light eyes (preferably blue like the book)
Caramel/brown hair that she straightens
I know Sadie has canonically straught hair, but with the natural and curly hair movements, I think it would be nice.
Think of it like this Sadie straightens her hair to fit in, but once the journey begins she doesn't have her flat iron and so has to accept her curly hair (think 2c-3b), also symbolising the broken family coming back together. The most important thing to a black woman is hee hair, right?
Conclusion
I dunno lol, I said what I said
submitted by Melancholy_girl3 to CharacterRant [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 19:24 Jamoke514 Got this from TJ. Been a while since I’ve cooked steak. Advice on how to prepare it for it Medium Rare-Medium. Going to use a Cast Iron Skillet. Cooking tomorrow and using 1 or both of those marinades.

Got this from TJ. Been a while since I’ve cooked steak. Advice on how to prepare it for it Medium Rare-Medium. Going to use a Cast Iron Skillet. Cooking tomorrow and using 1 or both of those marinades. submitted by Jamoke514 to steak [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 19:16 cesario_ Theorycrafting Saitama: killing (almost) any monster in a single punch

Hello 3d6! I’ve been working on this character theorycraft for a while now, and I’ve quite nearly accomplished my goal — only to fall barely short at the final 1%. I’m sharing it now in a 99-percent-complete state, for everyone to enjoy reading my mad scientist ravings, or to offer their own suggestions on how to wring out just a little bit more damage to finally have a character that can kill any creature in a single punch.
tl;dr: a theorycrafted level 20 Saitama character can deal 634 damage on average in a single punch, instantly killing 99% of all published monsters (27 monsters can survive).

The self-imposed rules

Now, let’s get into it!

Race

Protector Aasimar. Saitama claims to be an ordinary man, but let’s be honest, to have such ludicrous power, he must be more than human. Aasimar are more or less human, but with a touch of the divine, which fits the bill perfectly. Mechanically, we’re choosing this for the Radiant Soul option: as an action once per long rest, they transform for 1 minute and once per turn can deal their level in radiant damage to one target of an attack. At level 20, this will add +20 radiant damage to the punch, by far the highest single-attack damage boost of any racial ability.

Stats

Saitama has incredible strength, speed, reflexes, and durability, which he attributes to an intense training regimen. How could he have gotten such formidable training? Well, perhaps he read the instructions in a magic book. The Manuals of Gainful Exercise, Quickness of Action, and Bodily Health are very rare magic items that describe “fitness exercises,” “coordination and balance exercises,” and “health and diet tips” with words that are charged with magic. Studying these manuals and practicing their guidelines for 48 hours increases a creature’s STR, DEX, and CON stats by 2, as well as increasing their maximum for that score — up to a cap of 30. Clearly, to have such godlike strength, dexterity, and constitution, Saitama’s intense training must have included reading as many Manuals as necessary to raise his STR, DEX, and CON stats each to a godlike 30. This results in Saitama having a +10 to STR attack and damage rolls, a +10 boost to DEX checks like stealth and initiative, and a ridiculous amount of hit points. In order to multiclass, Saitama will also need at least a 13 in INT, WIS, and CHA — which should be achievable.

Classes

Saitama starts by taking three levels in Armorer Artificer, which gives him a suit of Arcane Armor that expands to cover his entire body and can be used as a spellcasting focus for artificer spells. The text describes “metallurgical pursuits,” but nothing RAW forbids one from choosing a suit of yellow leather armor for Arcane Armor. At AC 11 + DEX, this gives Saitama an AC of 21 — which doesn’t really matter, since he can kill nearly anything in a single punch before it ever has a chance of attacking him. We choose the Guardian Armor Model for Saitama’s Arcane Armor, causing the red rubber gloves on his leather armor to be counted as Thunder Gauntlets: they count as simple melee weapons when not holding anything in them, and deal 1d8 thunder damage on a hit. Saitama also has the option to use his INT modifier instead of STR or DEX when attacking with the gauntlets, but let’s be honest, he’s going to stick with his godlike +10 STR modifier here. Saitama will infuse his gloves with the Enhanced Weapon artificer infusion, giving them a +1 to attack and damage rolls, and turning them into a magic item. From Armorer, Saitama also learns the spells Booming Blade and Absorb Elements. To complete Saitama’s armor, he also gains a white Cloak of Billowing (a common magic item that does not require attunement) and a pair of red rubber Boots of Elvenkind (an uncommon magic item that also does not require attunement, and gives advantage on Stealth checks to move silently).
Next, Saitama takes nine levels in warlock. He chooses the Hexblade patron and Pact of the Blade, and gains the Hexblade’s Curse, the Eldritch Smite invocation, and the Banishing Smite spell from the Hexblade expanded spell list. He will also transform his gloves into his pact weapon, and take the Improved Pact Weapon invocation, allowing him to use his gloves as a spellcasting focus for warlock spells. Unfortunately, because his gloves are already a magic weapon with a +1 to attack and damage rolls from the Enhanced Weapon artificer infusion, they do not gain an additional +1 to attack and damage rolls from Improved Pact Weapon. Hexblade’s Curse allows Saitama to curse a creature within 30 feet for 1 minute as a bonus action, and add his proficiency bonus to damage rolls against that target. Eldritch Smite deals 1d8 force damage plus another 1d8 for each level of warlock spell slot expended when hitting a creature with one’s pact weapon. At a maximum 5th level spell slot, this adds 6d8 force damage to his punch. Banishing Smite activates as a bonus action and consumes concentration for 1 minute to add an extra 5d10 force damage on the next hit with a weapon attack. Additionally, if the target then has 50 HP or less, it is banished to its home plane (or until the spell ends). At nine levels in Warlock, Saitama gets two 5th-level spell slots per short rest. This is just enough for one usage of Eldritch Smite and one casting of Banishing Smite. However, he will then have to rest before going out to fight villains again — perhaps a good reason for why he spends so much time relaxing at home playing video games and reading manga. Saitama also gets two ASIs at his fourth and eighth levels of warlock. At these levels, he will take the Martial Adept and Fey Touched feats. The Martial Adept feat gives him a d6 superiority die and two maneuvers, one of which will be Menacing Attack (the other does not matter). Menacing Attack adds the d6 to the damage of the attack and forces the target to make a WIS save or be frightened (and though our goal is to kill the target outright, if it somehow survives, Saitama’s DC will be a difficult-to-surmount 24: 8 + 6 [proficiency bonus] + 10 [STR mod]). From the Fey Touched feat, Saitama will learn the first-level divination spell Gift of Alacrity, which lasts 8 hours without concentration and adds 1d8 to his initiative rolls.
To kill creatures in a single punch, Saitama will need to train to Assassinate: taking four levels in Assassin Rogue. Assassinate gives Saitama advantage on attacks against creatures that have not yet taken a turn in combat, and automatic critical hits on creatures who are surprised. In order to surprise creatures, Saitama will need to succeed on a Stealth check contested by the target’s Perception: “Any character or monster that doesn't notice a threat is surprised at the start of the encounter.” Saitama rarely sneaks up on his targets, but usually allows them to monologue for a long time before annihilating them with a single punch. It is his unremarkable appearance that allows him to take his enemies by surprise — and perhaps that appearance is its own form of stealth. Just to make getting surprise mechanically possible, Saitama will take an Expertise in Stealth, to double his proficiency for a +12 to Stealth in addition to his +10 DEX modifier. Due to his red rubber Boots of Elvenkind, he will also get advantage on Stealth checks made to move silently. With a +22 to Stealth, on an average d20 roll of 13.825 (with advantage), a Stealth of 35.825 should allow him to defeat the passive perception of nearly every monster — even the Greatwyrms, which have a passive perception of only 32. Tiamat has a passive perception of 36, and as the monster with the highest passive perception, she is the only monster capable of successfully noticing Saitama’s threat (unless he gets a little lucky with the Stealth roll). If we really want to ensure that Saitama can go undetected, we could give him the Epic Boon of Undetectability for an additional +10 to Stealth checks and immunity to detection or targeting by divination magic. He will also need to beat his target on an initiative roll to be able to get an automatic critical hit — which is why he will take the Alert feat on his fourth level of rogue, giving him a +5 to initiative rolls in addition to the +10 from his DEX modifier. As the only bonus monsters get to initiative is from their DEX modifier (and the highest DEX modifier that any monster has is +9, for the Elder Tempest or Will-o’-Wisp), with a total +6 edge from the +5 from Alert and his +10 DEX modifier, as well as +1d8 from Gift of Alacrity, Saitama will beat even the fastest monsters’ initiative rolls 89% of the time (and a later item will increase this to 97%).
When Saitama uses a Serious Punch, it’s like sending the target on a Path to their Grave. Thus, Saitama will take two levels in Grave Cleric. As an action, Path to the Grave allows Saitama to choose “another creature’s life force for termination.” The next time he hits the chosen creature within 30 feet with an attack, the creature has vulnerability to all of the attack’s damage, causing the damage to be doubled (as long as the creature is not immune or resistant to any of the damage types).
Lastly, Saitama will take two levels in paladin, gaining Divine Smite and the Dueling fighting style. When hitting with a melee weapon attack, he can expend a spell slot to Divine Smite, dealing additional radiant damage to the target. At three levels of artificer, two levels of cleric, and two levels of paladin, Saitama is a fifth-level multiclassed caster (his three levels from artificer are halved and rounded up to two, cleric gives two levels, and two levels of paladin is halved to one, for a total of five). This gives him two 3rd-level spell slots per long rest — spending a 3rd level slot on a Divine Smite gives an extra 4d8 radiant damage (1d8 off of the maximum of 5d8 from spending a 4th-level spell). It also deals an extra 1d8 to undead or fiend targets. The Dueling fighting style gives +2 to damage rolls when wielding a melee weapon in one hand and no other weapons. The Thunder Gauntlets count as simple melee weapons when not holding anything in them, so Saitama will hold something in his right hand, leaving him wielding only one Thunder Gauntlet on his left hand when he delivers a Serious Punch. (In One-Punch Man canon, Saitama usually punches with his right hand. For a mechanical reason, our theorycrafted DND Saitama has to punch with his left. Maybe this is why DND Saitama is slightly weaker than canon Saitama, and isn’t able to kill every monster in a single hit.)
With three levels of artificer, nine levels of warlock, four levels of rogue, two levels of cleric, and two levels of paladin, Saitama is a level 20 character.

Feats

As mentioned above, Saitama will take Martial Adept and Fey Touched at his fourth and eighth warlock level, and Alert at his fourth level of rogue.

Additional items

When Saitama strikes someone, it occasionally appears as if he has grown to incredible size (https://tenor.com/view/one-punch-man-gif-23643267). To simulate this, DND Saitama will consume a Potion of Giant Size (legendary) and a Potion of Growth (rare), increasing to Huge for 24 hours and then again to Gargantuan for 1d4 hours. From the Potion of Giant Size, his weapons roll three times as many dice (thus increasing his Thunder Gauntlets to deal 3d8 thunder damage on hit). From the Potion of Growth, Saitama gets advantage on STR checks and saves, and deals 1d4 additional damage on weapon attacks.
Saitama can attune to three magic items. We will choose the Hand of Vecna (legendary), Sword of Kas (legendary), and a Ring of Spell Storing (rare).
To attune to the Hand of Vecna, Saitama had to lop off his left hand at the wrist and replace it with the Hand of Vecna. This withered hand is hidden within his red rubber glove, and (among other properties) allows him to deal an extra 2d8 cold damage when he makes a melee weapon attack with a weapon held in the hand. The Hand of Vecna also includes one minor and one major beneficial property, along with one minor detrimental property. For the major beneficial property, we will choose the property: “When you hit with a weapon attack while attuned to the artifact, the target takes an extra 1d6 damage of the weapon's type.” For the minor beneficial property, we will choose immunity to charm and fear effects. The minor detrimental property we will choose is: “Your appearance changes as the DM decides” — from his intense training regimen (which included chopping off his left hand and replacing it with the Hand of Vecna), Saitama unfortunately lost all of his hair — still a sore spot for him.
The Sword of Kas grants several abilities, but Saitama only attacks with punches, so it will remain in its scabbard, somewhere on his person. While it is on his person, it adds an additional d10 to Saitama’s initiative (raising his probability of having a higher initiative than even a monster with +9 DEX to 97%). The Sword of Kas also includes one minor and one major beneficial property, as well as one minor and one major detrimental property. We will choose the same major beneficial property as the Hand of Vecna, for an extra 1d6 damage when hitting with a weapon attack (typically effects of the same type do not stack. However, since these are generic properties of two artifacts with different names, the properties should stack under RAW). The minor beneficial property can be any (some thematic options include immunity to disease or +1 AC), and the minor detrimental property can be: “The first time you touch a gem or piece of jewelry while attuned to this artifact, the value of the gem or jewelry is reduced by half.” Perhaps this explains why Saitama is poor. The major detrimental property can be taking 8d10 psychic damage when attuning to the Sword of Kas: Saitama mentions that his training was so intense that he thought he might die — perhaps this damage was why it felt so intense. (Note: with eighteen levels in classes with d8 hit dice and two levels of paladin for d10 hit dice, Saitama’s average hit points is 92, not counting the incredible 200 additional HP from his +10 CON modifier. Even at a maximum roll of 80 psychic damage from attuning to Sword of Kas, he wouldn’t actually die.) Interestingly, the Sword of Kas also causes its bearer to gradually become obsessed with destroying anyone corrupted by the Hand of Vecna — this might cause Saitama to become fairly conflicted.
Lastly, the Ring of Spell-Storing. Up to five levels of spells can be stored within, and can be cast while touching the ring. Saitama can spend one of his fifth-level Pact Magic slots to cast Absorb Elements (learned from his levels in artificer) into the ring, before resting to regain his Pact Magic slot. Absorb Elements can be cast as a reaction to elemental damage, grants resistance to the triggering damage, and adds an extra 1d6 of that damage type per spell level when the next time the caster hits with a melee attack on their next turn. Cast at a fifth level, this adds 5d6 elemental damage to Saitama’s punch. To voluntarily trigger the Absorb Elements, we will have Saitama use his free object interaction to stick a finger into a vial of acid held in his right hand (which also makes the Thunder Gauntlet in his right hand no longer count as a melee weapon since it's holding something, thus enabling him to use the Dueling fighting style with his left). The acid will burn Saitama, allowing him to cast Absorb Elements in reaction, getting resistance to the acid damage and charging up 5d6 acid damage to be released on his next melee attack this turn.

Preparation to punch

In order to maximize damage in a single attack, Saitama needs to do some preparation. At some point, he will spend one of his fifth-level Pact Magic slots to cast Absorb Elements into the Ring of Spell Storing, before resting to regain his Pact Magic slot.
On the day of, he must also cast Gift of Alacrity to maximize his initiative rolls (this lasts 8 hours), and spend an action drinking the Potion of Giant Size (which lasts 24 hours). One hour before the fight, he must drink the Potion of Growth (which lasts a minimum of 1 hour). He must also open the vial of acid and hold it ready in his right hand.
A minute before punching his target, he must spend an action to activate his Radiant Soul Aasimar transformation, and spend an action and a bonus action cursing his target with the Hexblade’s Curse and Path to the Grave.
Finally, on the turn he punches, he spends his free object interaction to touch the acid in the vial until it causes damage, then casts Absorb Elements as a reaction from his Ring of Spell Storing. He spends his bonus action casting Banishing Smite, and then his action casting the cantrip Booming Blade. (He has cast three spells in one turn, but the only limitation on casting multiple spells per turn is that if he casts a spell as a bonus action, he may only cast a cantrip — like Booming Blade — with his action.)

The punch

Booming Blade requires a material component: a melee weapon worth at least 1 sp. Normally, using his arcane armor as a spellcasting focus would allow him to ignore material components, but this material component cannot be ignored because it has a cost. The Thunder Gauntlets from a suit of arcane armor have no assigned cost, but the basic leather armor costs 10 gp, so it’s a safe assumption that a magically-enhanced +1 Thunder Gauntlet would cost more than 1 sp. Upon casting the spell, Saitama makes a melee attack against a creature within 5 feet. At level 20, the cantrip adds an extra 3d8 thunder damage to the initial attack, and an additional 4d8 if the target moves on its next turn — but the latter damage will not count for this purpose because our goal is to annihilate the target with the first hit.
Assuming that his stealth and initiative checks have allowed Saitama to surprise his target and go first in the initiative order, he has advantage on his attack from Assassinate and gets +17 to the roll: +6 from his proficiency, +10 from his STR modifier, and +1 from the Enhanced Weapon infusion. The monsters with the highest AC are Tiamat and the Tarrasque, with an AC of 25 — with advantage and a +17 to hit, Saitama has an 88% chance of hitting, and any hit is an automatic critical hit from Assassinate. If a guaranteed hit is desired, we could give Saitama an Epic Boon of Combat Prowess, choosing to hit on a melee weapon attack once per short rest. At that point, the attack roll doesn’t even matter.

Damage

The 1d8 thunder damage from his Thunder Gauntlets is tripled to 3d8 by the Potion of Giant Size. The Gauntlets deal an extra 1d4 thunder damage from the Potion of Growth, an extra 2d6 thunder damage from the major beneficial properties of the Hand of Vecna and the Sword of Kas, and an extra 1d6 thunder damage from the Menacing Attack maneuver. The attack deals an extra 2d8 cold damage because it was made with a weapon wielded by the Hand of Vecna. We add an additional 6d8 force damage from Eldritch Smite, 5d10 force damage from Banishing Smite, 4d8 radiant damage from Divine Smite, 5d6 acid damage from Absorb Elements, and 3d8 thunder damage from Booming Blade.
Let’s total this up: 6d8+1d4+3d6 thunder + 2d8 cold + 6d8+5d10 force + 4d8 radiant + 5d6 acid damage
All these dice are doubled on the critical hit from Assassinate: 12d8+2d4+6d6 thunder + 4d8 cold + 12d8+10d10 force + 8d8 radiant + 10d6 acid damage
Now, counting the flat damage: 10 thunder damage from Saitama’s STR modifier on the Thunder Gauntlets, +1 thunder damage from the Enhanced Weapon infusion, +6 thunder damage from Hexblade’s Curse, and +2 thunder damage from the Dueling fighting style, for a total of +19 thunder damage. We also add 20 radiant damage from the Radiant Soul transformation.
Another preliminary total: 12d8+2d4+6d6+19 thunder + 4d8 cold + 12d8+10d10 force + 8d8+20 radiant + 10d6 acid damage
All the damage is doubled by the vulnerability inflicted by Path to the Grave: 24d8+4d4+12d6+38 thunder + 8d8 cold + 24d8+20d10 force + 16d8+40 radiant + 20d6 acid damage
This averages to 198 thunder + 36 cold + 218 force + 112 radiant + 70 acid damage, for a total of 634 damage on average in a single punch.
Anything that survives this formidable blow must then have more than 50 hit points remaining, or else it is banished to its home plane without a save by Banishing Smite (thus, Saitama's punch can effectively defeat creatures with up to 684 HP).
After two short rests, Saitama could theoretically do a Serious Punch again on the same day — minus the +40 radiant damage from Radiant Soul (doubled by Path to the Grave), the only ability used that requires a long rest to recharge. After a second Serious Punch, though, he’ll run out of third-level spell slots for the Divine Smite.

The targets (who survives?)

With the most hit points out of any monster in DND 5e, the Tarrasque has 676 HP, damage immunities to fire, poison, and bludgeoning/piercing/slashing damage from nonmagical attacks, three legendary resistances per day, advantage on saves against spells, can nullify or reflect ranged attack spells, and can terrify creatures within 120 feet with its Frightful Presence. None of this protects it from a single punch from our Caped Baldy. On 62% of possible damage rolls, that Tarrasque is getting sent back to its plane of origin, gibbering with fear: with a WIS modifier of +0, it has no chance of succeeding the DC 24 WIS save against Saitama’s Menacing Attack (of course, Tarrasques are immune to the frightened condition, but let’s ignore that because it’s funny).
However, this doesn’t quite count as killing the tarrasque in a single punch, since it’s banished but still alive (and returns after one minute if it’s not originally from another plane). Additionally, a several other monsters could definitely survive the punch — chief among them, Tiamat: Outside of being immune to acid and cold damage (reducing the damage by 106 points and dropping the remaining 528 total damage from the punch well below her total HP of 615), Tiamat is also immune to spells of level 6 or lower: thus completely nullifying the effects of both Booming Blade and Banishing Smite. However, as a fiend, Divine Smite does deal an extra d8 radiant damage against her. Still, eliminating Booming Blade and Banishing Smite drops the single punch damage to 382 on average, leaving Tiamat with 233 HP: more than a third of her health. Instead casting Banishing Smite and Booming Blade, Saitama could use his action to punch twice using the Thirsting Blade eldritch invocation, spending both his 5th-level Pact Magic spell slots on Eldritch Smites and both 3rd-level slots on Divine Smites. If Saitama managed to sneak up on Tiamat to surprise her and get the automatic critical hits from Assassinate, he would deal 3d8+1d4+3d6 thunder + 6d8 force + 5d8 radiant damage on each attack, doubled from the critical hit to 6d8+2d4+6d6 thunder + 12d8 force + 10d8 radiant damage, and a total of +19 thunder on both attacks and +20 radiant on the first. The first attack damage would be doubled from Path to the Grave, but the second would not. The first attack would deal 12d8+4d4+12d6+38 thunder + 24d8 force + 20d8+40 radiant damage, and the second 6d8+2d4+6d6+19 thunder + 12d8 force + 10d8 radiant; for a total damage of 553 on average, still 62 points short of Tiamat’s 615 total HP.
Other creatures that would survive:
Thus, our final list of 27 survivors of Saitama’s punch:
Saitama can kill all remaining 2,800+ monsters ever printed in a single punch.

Thank you for reading!

If you've gotten this far, thanks for sticking with me! If you have any ideas on how to squeeze out the last bits of damage to allow Saitama to one-hit kill any of the remaining 27 monsters, please comment to let me know!
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2023.06.03 19:02 obliVIOnpreSTINe I didn't even doubt it for a second

I didn't even doubt it for a second submitted by obliVIOnpreSTINe to facepalm [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 18:58 Frank_Leroux Molossus, Chapter Sixteen

First Chapter
Chapter Fifteen
“Thank you, Ms. President, and Mr. Secretary-General. It’s my privilege to come and speak to everyone present during such a momentous time in human history. One which, I hope, will lead to a brighter future for us all…”
US President Correa’s boilerplate beginning flowed out as she scanned the room. Behind her rostrum sat a larger dais tiled with green marble, behind which sat the UN President, Secretary-General, and Under-Secretary-General. Two huge screens flanked the dais, and those screens now showed Correa’s face as she continued.
“…and we are committed to our country’s pledge to finding a peaceful and just way for Coalition technology to be incorporated worldwide, and to not attempt any reverse-engineering of our own. Make no mistake; we do not do this out of any sense of altruism or fairness, as pleasant as that may sound. We will hold this pledge sacred for the simple reason that, if the United States were to attempt such efforts the rest of the world would, without a doubt, find out. That, of course, would lead to a great instability.”
‘Great instability’ was diplomatic-speak for ‘the rest of the world then gangs up on the USA and then everything goes to hell’.
“I know there has already been a great deal of debate in this august hall as to the best way to proceed forward, in a fair and impartial manner. We believe that we have found what one might call a ‘trial run’ which will allow us to work out such matters.”
The general murmuring from the many semi-circular rows of desks in front of her increased.
“To begin with, during the first weeks after first contact we wanted to make sure our guests from the Coalition would not starve to death. Much like humanity’s own ships during the Age of Sail, Coalition exploration vessels store enough provisions for years…but such provisions never last. They have very advanced recycling, but mostly for water and even that is only a stop-gap measure. It is unknown even at this time as to how long it will take to repair the Exultant Finger of Rithro, and we did not want to risk the crew running out of food.
“Therefore, we undertook an emergency effort to have their ship’s medic examine various Earth foods to determine their compatibility with our guests’ varied biochemistries. I am pleased to report that there are quite a few Earth foodstuffs which are indeed compatible, although there are some specific items which act as allergens amongst some of the Coalition species. During these efforts, we did learn a bit about how their alien biochemistries work…information which has been duly published and is now openly available. We also began to get glimpses of something wonderful, and asked the Coalition crew for more details. They supplied us with some general ideas of what their medical technology can accomplish; I must emphasize that we do not possess any knowledge of how they can perform such miracles.”
Now the murmuring got quite a bit higher, but not quite to the point where they’d have to call for order.
“Yes, I use the word ‘miracles’ advisedly. For example, take Captain Sadaf. You have all seen her, and how she moves like a person in the prime of their life. Now. What if I told you that she is a little over four hundred years old?”
The murmuring died down into a shocked silence.
“Her species, the auhn, is no more long-lived than we are…but they are able to regenerate and remove the effects of aging. I hope the esteemed ambassadors can see what I am driving at. I propose that we set up a research institute, international in scope, to be placed at a neutral location which is still to be determined. The purpose of that institute will be to study and adapt Coalition medical technology for use in humans.”
Now the murmuring started again; she hoped they were actually listening instead of hatching side-deals with each other.
“You all have families and friends. I’m sure you have at least one family member, one good friend, who died of some horrible and unnecessary affliction. Think of what this means to the world, to us. It is also an excellent way to determine the inevitable issues and frictions which will arise from such a concerted international effort, and that, in turn, will inform our efforts in mutual reverse-engineering of other Coalition technology.
“I know this is, in many ways, a frightening time. Change can be frightening. But I am convinced that you will all know the right way forward, and that you will all see the need for us to unite in this matter, even if others may not be so clear-cut. I thank you for the opportunity to speak.”
As she stepped away from the rostrum, the UN President cleared his throat.
“We will now begin the debate on Madame President Correa’s proposal. Paper copies, with specifics of the proposal, are now being distributed to you all. We’ll now begin the debate period…yes, the gentleman from Portugal…?”
__________
Correa’s Chief of Staff was a shorter, tubby man with an olive complexion by the name of Pablo Rosas. He and Correa sat in a White House conference room, staring at a big screen which now showed the results of the UN vote. “Well, I suppose that went about as well as we could expect,” said Rosas.
“Yep. I was surprised they even agreed with our asking them to kick in some money.”
Rosas chuckled. “Keep in mind that all of this new medical tech will be available for anyone patent-free. Should be air-tight legally, since nobody here on Earth invented it; we’re merely adapting it. I think that was the sweetener we needed to get it passed.”
The president gave a brief nod, then tapped a few keys on the controls in front of her. The screen now showed a world map. “Now we just have to figure out where to put the damn thing without everyone getting butt-mad about it.”
“Hmm.” Rosas laced his fingers over his substantial gut as he regarded the map. “Someplace not ‘the usual’, then.”
Correa growled in frustration. “I keep thinking Switzerland, but I know there’s gonna be a lot of shit flung about that it’s too European-centric. Taiwan would be great; they’ve got both a good tech base and excellent transport infrastructure.”
“But way too controversial, for obvious reasons,” replied Rosas. “Japan?”
“China will, again, kick up a fuss. Huh. New Zealand?”
“That might work. They tend to be more neutral…but then again some might say they’re in too close with Australia, and that this whole effort is too Western-centric.” His eyes flicked back to north on the map. He was about to move his gaze elsewhere, but then he paused. “What about Iceland?”
“Iceland?” Correa almost scoffed, then looked more thoughtfully at the map. “Okay, they’re a NATO member which is a minus. But they tend to remain mostly neutral, which is a plus. Decent transportation infrastructure…don’t we have a naval air base there?”
“I think so, let me check…” Rosas tapped at his phone. “Hey, Jack? What can you tell me about any US naval air bases in Iceland? Just the highlights.” After a couple of minutes, he responded with a curt, “Okay, that’s enough, thanks.”
He put his phone away. “We kinda-sorta have one, at a place called Keflavik. The base there used to be a lot bigger during the Cold War. Then we shut it down after the Soviets were no longer a going concern. Iceland uses it now, and they allow us to fly submarine-search aircraft out of there, but a few years ago they nixed the DOD’s request to rebuild it into a more permanent base.”
“That does work in their favor. It makes for better optics if they’re known for keeping NATO at arm’s length.”
Rosas sat up. “Think the UN will go for it?”
“We can only try. I’ll have our ambassador in Reykjavik make some discreet inquiries, let’s see if they’d be okay with our proposing them as a candidate.”
The Chief of Staff smiled. “If it goes through, this institute will be pumping well north of a billion dollars per year into their economy. That should make it more than ‘okay’.
__________
Agent Cécile Savoie sat in a secure-location breakroom, silently grumbling as she held an as-yet un-drunk mug of coffee in her hands. As the agent-in-charge of the security detail during the Camp David incident, she’d been put on administrative leave, right alongside every other agent who’d been there. But it wasn’t like she had much down time; the inquiry board into that incident now summoned her damn near every other day for yet another round of tedious questioning.
“Hey,” said Hanson as he strolled in, looking just as sour as she felt.
She looked up in surprise. “Hey yourself. I thought you were assigned to the alien detail.”
“I was,” he said as he seated himself across the circular table from her. “Guess being in Alabama when the shitshow went down wasn’t far enough away to be completely out of suspicion. I just finished running my own gauntlet. But the rumor is, I’m getting it easy compared to everyone who was at Camp David, including the special forces people. Especially you.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty much a colonoscopy every day,” she muttered. “Going over the timeline, where I was at which times, who I had direct line of sight on, who I was in radio contact with.” She finally sipped her coffee.
Hanson’s sour expression deepened. “Do you really think it was one of us?”
She sighed. “It has to be. My gut tells me that there’s more than one mole and I told the inquiry board as much. The fuckers who got in knew too much about our patrol patterns, where everyone was, when they’d have a clear shot at an infil. That means someone with access to our methods and comms, and as to the latter we don’t use CB radios.”
The other agent leaned back. “Fuck. I wish I knew why any of us would do that. We’re supposed to be quiet professionals, not frothing radicals.”
Savoie turned the mug in her hands. “Not to tell tales out of school but, through the whisper network, they’ve been leaning hard on the captured dudes from the attack. Apparently one of their main ‘objections’,” and here she made some one-handed air quotes, “is that they think the whole Breaker thing is a ruse. It’s all smoke and mirrors, so that we’ll beg the Coalition to come and save us. And then…well, it gets vague after that but I guess they claim that at best we’ll get turned into the galactic equivalent of a Native American reservation. Worst case, we all get harvested for our precious bodily fluids.”
Hanson stared at her for a moment in disbelief. “That is, if you will forgive the uncouth term, utterly retarded. For chrissake, the Hubble got some beautiful shots of their ship once they’d spun that shield around to reveal it to us. I mean, I’m no spacecraft expert but even I could tell it had gotten the shit pounded out of it.”
She responded with a shrug. “Hey, Flat Earthers are still a thing.”
“Flat Earthers don’t stage FUCKING mortar attacks in our nation’s capital,” snapped Hanson. Then he subsided and spoke more softly. “Sorry, I shouldn’t be so on edge. This whole thing just pisses me off.”
“Join the club,” said Savoie as she sipped more coffee. “I just don’t get it, though.”
Hanson made a gentle ‘continue’ wave of his hand.
She leaned forward. “Okay. Our comrades in the CIA managed to identify the four who made it into the compound. They were all mercenaries, each with at least ten or fifteen years of experience in kicking ass around some of the worst hot spots in the world. Syria, Burma, bunch of places in Africa. One of ‘em even turned out to be ex-Wagner group.”
“Okay?” It was a leading single-word question, but not an unkind one.
“So why was the rest of the attack made up of nothing but a bunch of goddamn shit-kickers? And that includes the aborted attempt in Decatur. I’ve seen the files of those we rounded up in the Camp David attack. They were all low-life idiots just banging around, maybe they might have once held a gun in their lives. Hell, from what I’ve heard, the shootings that triggered the alarm at Camp David were an accident; those intruders were supposed to sneak around that patrol, not kill them. They all had the same top-of-the-line kit, so we know whoever is behind this has deep pockets. Why not hire an entire bunch of competent people instead of doing it onesy-twoseys?”
“It is a puzzle.” Hanson got up and set a styrofoam cup of water into the nearby microwave. As the cup turned within its electromagnetic prison, he leaned against the nearby counter and pondered her question. “Maybe the team in the woods was intended just as a distraction?”
“That’s what I thought at first, but then I reconsidered. I mean, what if the four who went in failed? You’d still need a proper backup plan. Same thing with the Decatur bunch. By the way, did they ever catch them?”
Hanson let out a dark chuckle. “Decatur PD found a pile of vests and rifles, hastily wiped down. They were able to pull a few partial prints off of ‘em. My guess is they’ve fled to the proverbial four winds, hoping to lay low for the rest of their lives. We’ll nab ‘em eventually.”
The microwave dinged and he retrieved his hot water, then pulled a tea bag out of his jacket pocket as he re-seated himself.
Savoie smiled. “I never figured you for a tea guy.”
He unwrapped the bag and with a bit of ceremony dunked it into his cup. “Well, I used to be a coffee guy, but my gut doesn’t agree with the acidity.”
“We do have tea here, you know.” She pointed to the storage bins behind him.
“Yeah, but it’s cheap-ass stuff. The brand I like is expensive, but worth it…” Hanson’s eyes widened as he trailed off.
She raised an eyebrow. “Hanson? Do you smell burnt toast?”
“They couldn’t afford it,” he said in a near-whisper.
Savoie was about to tell him to stop being overly dramatic, then she realized he might be on to something and that she didn’t dare distract him. “Keep talking.”
He leaned forward, his forearms on the table. “Okay. Imagine you’re a hard-bitten mercenary. You’ve been in the literal shit, in every nasty conflict anyone cares to name. Somehow, someone finds you and comes to you. They say ‘hey, these aliens are bad news, do you want to kill them?’ Even if you, as the hypothetical mercenary, are down with the cause…”
“From what the intruders were yelling, they were,” said Savoie.
“Yeah but even then, our mystery financier is asking you to infil and exfil out of one of the most heavily guarded pieces of real estate on the planet. Oh, and kill a bunch of special-forces-maybe and aliens-definitely in between. What do you do then?”
She replied with a grim smile. “If I’m that mercenary, then I ask for a metric fuck-ton of money. And there were four of them, they would have all done the same. Hell, they must have been doing collective bargaining.”
Hanson dunked his tea bag as he thought it through. “Okay, so our mystery mastermind has a lot of money, but not billions on hand to hire a literal army of hard cases. Huh. So those other dipshits might indeed have been a distraction.”
“Maybe. They must have also spent quite a bit on the mortar attack. That wasn’t made by some hobbyist in their bedroom, they knew what they were doing. Given that nobody saw them set up the launcher or leave, they were more pro.” Savoie hoped that the FBI’s efforts to track the various mortar components turned up something soon. Thus far, those efforts were bogged down; as it turned out, quite a few companies had ordered the identified components, and tracking the subsequent second-hand purchases was time-consuming.
“And those mortar-making pros would be more expensive.” Hanson sipped a bit of tea. “Did they ever get anything off of the launcher itself?”
“Sadly, no. Turns out the whole damned thing was homemade, constructed out of tubing and other off-the-shelf components. It was also wiped down thoroughly, no prints. Like I said, pros.”
“But limited in resources,” said Hanson. “Which explains one of the things that’s bugged me. Namely, that our OPFOR didn’t use some proper artillery. If they have a couple of moles in the Secret Service, then it should be easy to recruit and pay some military dudes to slip ‘em some gear and alter the logs. They could stow a howitzer inside a semi-tractor-trailer. You could park that thing anywhere up to 25 miles away. Use a single 155mm Excalibur GPS-guided munition, boom. That would have pretty much obliterated the stage and everyone on it. Then you just re-stow the howitzer and toodle off all innocent-like, right when everyone is freaking the hell out.”
“So they couldn’t afford that type of arty strike,” she said. “Or they simply didn’t have the contacts to pull that off. Hmm. I wonder if our moles are getting paid at all?”
Hanson resumed his thousand-yard stare. “The mortar attack must have been planned first. The other two attacks feel much more like rush jobs.”
“Eh? Oh, I get it. Sadaf’s speech was known well in advance. It was going to be one of her first big public appearances since the initial presidential speech. They were broadcasting it online to the world. Having her get turned into chunky red salsa, in real time, would be one helluva statement. So that’s what they focused on.” She drank a bit more coffee, and now it was time for her eyes to widen. “Our mole or moles didn’t arrive at Camp David until after Sadaf’s speech was announced.”
“That…oh, yeah, that makes sense. Originally the mortar attack is the OPFORs’ only focus, but yet somehow they’ve suborned one or two Secret Service agents and they have ‘em in their back pocket. Then one, or better yet both, of the moles gets assigned to the Camp David detail, and they realize that now that they have a golden opportunity to get at the other aliens as well. So they go off and hire four pros for the actual attack inside, plus a bunch of chucklefucks to act as a distraction, because that’s all they can afford since the four pros are asking for some serious money.”
Savoie leaned forward. “When did Chao and Grakosh leave Camp David?”
“It was, ah, three? No, four days after we got everyone settled, both the aliens and the special forces types.”
“Okay, so then the OPFOR gets word, courtesy of our moles, that one of the aliens is now heading to Alabama. But now they’re stretched so thin that they can’t afford anything other than to hire another bunch of dipshits to make a run at them and hope for the best.”
“And then the second bunch lets the FNG drive.”
They both laughed, but that humor settled down as they both thought through the chain of inference.
“It is pretty thin,” said Savoie at last. “There’s a lot of assumptions in there.”
“Yeah. But I do like the idea of our moles getting assigned at the last minute.”
She rubbed her forehead. “We had a bunch of new people come in when they decided to stow the Rithro crew there. Seven, no eight in all.”
“It’s a place to start,” said Hanson. He finished his tea. “C’mon, let’s see if we can get a meeting with the inquiry board.”
__________
A little while later and not very far away, three people sat in a well-lit but otherwise deadly dull room. At least the chairs were somewhat comfortable. Matt and Martinez sat at two chairs against one wall, while across from them McCoy sat sprawled sideways on another with a foul look on her face. She glowered at the far beige-painted wall. “This completely sucks. Why can’t we have our phones? I could at least play some mahjong.”
“This is a secure location, Corporal,” replied Matt. “Ixnay on the onephays.”
Martinez’s leg jittered. “How long are we gonna sit here? They said they’d call us in, like, an hour ago!”
“Dunno, it’s some kind of last-minute interview thing,” replied Matt with Zen-like calm.
The corporal looked over at Matt. “I don’t get you, man.”
Matt grinned. “Nobody gets me. I’m like the wind, baby!”
“That’s not…I mean, I watched you open up a dude like he was a bag of fuckin’ Doritos using nothing but a fuckin’ knife. Now you’re being all Caine from ‘Kung Fu’.”
“It’s good to know that the classics are still appreciated,” said Matt.
Martinez pointed at him. “If you start calling me ‘Grasshopper’ I will shoot you.”
McCoy turned her glare to the ceiling. “Maybe it’s a psychological test. They want to see if we crack under pressure and start yakking secrets.”
“I mean, I’m sure they’re recording us right now,” replied Matt. “But it’s merely as a precaution. I am also five-nines certain that none of us are suspects. We weren’t integrated into the compound’s overall security, and thus it would be unlikely that we could have let our four attackers in.”
“Not to mention, we were the ones to kill ‘em,” added Martinez. “Well, except for the one that Takh took care of.”
“Yep. This is…I won’t call it a formality, but the board just wants to know where you were and what you saw. Walk them through your personal timelines, understand? Tell them only what you know. If you don’t know something, then say so.”
McCoy turned herself around so that she now sprawled the other way. “This whole bullshit just bugs me. Takh and the others are off with a bunch of strangers and I…I mean, we aren't there to help protect them.”
Matt and Martinez shared a meaningful glance. “From what I heard, Takh is quite capable of taking care of himself,” said the latter with a grin. “You told me he pitched that one dude across the room like he was throwing a softball.”
For once, the petite corporal looked a bit flustered. “Yeah, but, I mean, what if some other potential bad guy gets the drop on him with a gun? I don’t like not being there. I just wanna know that he’s okay. I should be there, just to make sure.”
The smaller man snapped his fingers in the face of the taller, who sighed and took out his wallet. With great ceremony, Matt pulled out a five-dollar bill and placed it upon the now-upraised palm of Martinez.
“Told ya,” said Martinez with a grin.
She sat up and glared at them both. “That doesn’t mean anything! Takh is a good guy!”
“Nobody said he wasn’t,” replied Matt as he stowed his wallet. “He is indeed a good guy.”
“Yeah, seriously, we’re glad you two hooked up,” added Martinez. “Takh’s solid. Hell, I’d let him date my sister.”
“I. Am. Not. Hooked Up. With ANYONE.” McCoy now looked furious enough to chew nails.
Martinez stroked his chin. “Kissing might be a problem, though.”
Matt performed a similar chin-stroking action. “Hmm, indeed, Corporal, I do believe it might be a serious issue. One has all of those mandibles to contend with.” He hooked his fingers next to his mouth in an approximation of an udhyr’s face. “Still, I think that, with enough will and effort, one could figure it out. Like the man said, life finds a way.”
“But how much tongue is he packing?” posed Martinez. “You know what the man also says. Big dude, big tongue. Could make things more interesting, all around.”
The woman did not look amused. “Martinez, Toke? You are now both officially gigantic flatulating assholes.”
“C’mon, McCoy!” protested Martinez. “Think of it this way. A few years from now, let’s say we filthy humans are now part of the Coalition and I’m at some meet ‘n greet, and I just so happen to spy me an oh-so-very-fiiine udhyr mamacita from across the room. Now, I wanna do my bit for my species and approach her, and get some good old inter-species cultural interaction going on. But there’s all sorts of questions. How do I compliment her without insulting her culture? How am I supposed to get in good with her? How do the mechanics work? How do the various bits line up? We need details! You’re at the tip of the spear, we all need good intel!”
McCoy slumped back into her seat. “Over seven hundred billion Dimmadollars of defense spending, and yet somehow I wind up stuck in a room with you two fuckos…oh, by the way, Toke,” she added, pointing a finger at Matt, “why the hell can you and Sarge never go back to Okinawa?”
“Nice distraction, McCoy,” said Martinez. “My guess is some sort of wet-work shit.”
Matt just smiled. “Oh for fuck’s sake, I don’t kill everyone I meet. I was a Second LT at the time, managed to somehow leapfrog my way into officer ranks all the way from enlisted. Anyways, the Okinawa affair was merely a case of, well, one particular case of rye whiskey. The good sergeant…was he a sergeant then? Oh yeah, we had done some other stuff I can’t tell you about in someplace I can’t tell you where, and we were celebrating Shaw getting his third stripe. We’d got ahold of the previously-mentioned case of whiskey and then we began toasting to each other’s good health. We did a lot of toasting. Quite a lot of toasting. As you can imagine, the toasting went on and on until we, um, well we did some unwise things. It started out with us sparring-for-fun with each other in public and escalated from there. No locals were harmed, and nothing we did was hella illegal, or I would’ve never made Captain. Buuut the local government would definitely throw a shitfit if me or, God forbid, both of us set foot back on the island.” He chuckled. “Hell, the Okinawan customs people probably still have both of our pictures taped up inside their booths with a big old sign saying ‘DO NOT ADMIT THIS PERSON, YOU FOOL’ written above them.”
“What did you do?” asked Martinez. His eyes were big and soulful, like a kid asking for yet one more story before bedtime.
Matt shrugged. “I mean, I don’t remember much for obvious reasons. I’m almost sure we didn’t piss on any monuments, that would have definitely been cause for a serious demotion. We did do a number on some shrubbery, that I do remember. We decided it needed to be trimmed back, and so we did so. Using our bare hands. Seemed like a good idea at the time.”
A fearsome light came into McCoy’s eyes. “Martinez, do you know what this means?”
He looked at her all uncertain. “Um, Toke and Sarge have cast-iron livers?”
“No, you fool. Blackmail material.”
Matt pointed back at her. “Hey, now, I told you that in confidence. Besides, Shaw has a lot more to contend with right now.”
The reminder of the sergeant’s current crippled state brought the elevated atmosphere of the room back down. McCoy nodded as her smile faded. “Right. Hey, did you see the Prez’s speech at the UN?”
“Yep,” said Matt. “From what I’ve read, the political wrangling after it seems pretty tame compared to the usual.”
Martinez snorted. “No shit. Did either of you see the laundry list of shit that we might be able to do? Anti-aging, limb regrowth, cancer treatments which work well and which don’t half-kill the patient…hell, maybe even Alzheimer’s could be in our rear-view mirror. The grand high muckity-mucks are falling all over themselves to get that out into the world, for themselves if nobody else.”
“You’re way too cynical, Martinez,” said Matt.
“Oh fuck off. What if…okay, I know this sounds like a cheesy sci-fi concept, but what if they hoard all of the good shit for themselves and we peons get just the crumbs?”
Matt lapsed back into his meditative demeanor. “In that case, my dear corporal, you or I or McCoy or someone like us will show those hypothetical elites that, while they are indeed long-lived, they are not in fact immortal.”
The trio fell into silence for a few minutes. Then Martinez leaned over towards Matt. “Ah, a little birdie told me you were involved in questioning the prisoners we nabbed at Camp David.”
“I merely facilitated certain conversations,” replied Matt.
Martinez sighed. “What the fuck does that mean?”
“Ask me no questions and I will tell you no lies…Corporal.”
McCoy let out a growl. “Well, I heard these terrorist assholes are saying that the Breakers aren’t real, that it’s all fake videos from the Coalition.”
“Just to play devil’s advocate,” said Matt, “our AI image and video generation is already getting to the point where, soon, we puny humans could manufacture such evidence.”
“What?” Martinez looked as if he was about to launch himself at Matt.
Matt held up a calming hand. “I’m not saying it is fake. The Hubble pics are damned convincing.”
Martinez hiked up one foot to place it on his seat, then rested his chin on his knee. “Fuck. I guess it didn’t convince everyone.” He mused for a few moments. “Wait. What if we made it even more convincing?”
“How?” asked Matt.
“We send some humans up to the Rithro. Two or three at least. The boats can still make it up to the ship, right?”
For once Matt looked uncertain. “I think so? Dunno how many times they can come and go without recharging, we’ll have to ask ‘em.”
“Right, so we set up an even better publicity stunt than the Hubble pics. Choose a few people, from all over the world. We have ‘em travel up to the Rithro, take pics and video up close showing the damage. Even take ‘em inside the ship and get a full tour, maybe…if the crew is okay with that, of course.”
“Huh.” Matt sat back and pondered the idea. “That’s a really good idea, Martinez. I guess you aren’t as dumb as you look.”
The corporal responded with a slight smile at the verbal jab. “We’d need to choose the right people, though.”
“They’d have to be trustworthy…or at least someone that the entire world will consider trustworthy,” said Matt.
“Well known,” added McCoy. She no longer looked vengeful. “With recognizable faces and voices, and then they can go on all the talk shows after and say that, yes indeed, I got a tour of the ship and it is indeed quite banged up.”
Martinez stared at the far wall. “Some kind of celebrity? Heh. You think Tom Cruise would be up for it?”
Matt laughed. “That beautiful maniac? Hell, he’d insist on shooting an entire movie up there, with at least one action scene where he’s hanging off of the outside of the ship.”
They all smiled at the resulting mental image.
“Chao could work,” said McCoy into the silence. “She’s kind of a celebrity now. After all, she was the first human to come into contact with aliens, eh?” She gave Matt a big and very un-subtle wink.
To skirt the rather…unconventional methods used to achieve a positive First Contact, Matt’s role had been very much demoted in the official story. Now every recounting of the tale included a bit of ‘…oh, and there was also another person who stumbled across our brave woman in the midst of her attempts at informational exchange with the aliens…” His exact identity was also not published, under the screen of ‘he wishes to remain anonymous’.
“Oh bite me, McCoy, it’s fun,” replied Matt. He waggled his eyebrows. “Besides, I work better in the shadows!” He threw his forearm across his face like a half-assed Count Dracula trying to hide behind his cape.
Then he dropped his arm. “Yeah, Chao would be good as a current social-media darling. Of course, she might not want that. She strikes me as more of the wallflower type, for the most part.”
“We need more people,” said Martinez, as he stared at the floor. “Chao might be good on her own, but she’s got that motor-mouth talking thing when you get her going. It’s one or the other. Either she’s trying to shrink into a corner and take up as little space as possible, or suddenly you’re getting pulled into another corner for a doctoral dissertation on how minimal-energy transfer-orbits work.”
Matt pondered for a moment. “Wait, when did she do that? I never sat through one of those lectures.”
Martinez looked away and…well, Matt hoped that their supposed overlords were indeed recording this particular moment in time because the hard-bitten Hispanic special-forces corporal actually blushed.
McCoy, of course, realized a golden opportunity for payback and immediately pounced. “Why, Corporal Martinez,” she purred. “Doooo tell us. When did Chao Me Chu, heh, pull you into a corner? Hmmm?”
“She’s…she’s just real nice, that’s all,” replied Martinez. “I asked her a couple of questions, and she answered them. That’s all. We both love classic sci-fi, like Asimov and shit. I guess we bonded over that.”
Matt cleared his throat. “Aaaaand may I remind you two and everyone listening in that we have all been cooped up nuts-to-butts for awhile? Don’t mistake familiarity for romantic bullshit.” He pointed over at Martinez. “But you. If you can follow at least half of what she talks about, then you are absolutely without-a-single-fucking-doubt wasted as a corporal, even if you’re in a low-drag high-speed outfit like this. You hear me?”
“Um, yes sir.” It was the first time in McCoy’s memory that anyone had addressed Matt as befitting his perhaps-former rank.
“Good. You get your ass into college, somehow. You’re a smart guy, you’ll figure all that shit out. And as for Chao? Just give it room to breathe. Let her know you’re interested, but don’t press the matter.”
“Let her know?” For once Martinez looked completely lost. “How do I…” he trailed off. “I mean, I like her…and yeah, I mean I like her in that way, but she’s so damn smart and pretty and I’m just some dipshit meathead.”
“Hey, don’t sell yourself short,” said Matt. “You’re our dipshit meathead.”
McCoy’s vengeful smile faded. “Martinez…no, Luca.”
Martinez looked up in surprise at her use of his first name.
She continued. “Just talk to her. Neither of you have any clue as to what ‘normal’ social interactions look like. In your case, it’s because you’ve been a soldier for all of your adult life. In her case, it’s because she’s, well, because she’s Chao. So just walk up to her and be straightforward. Trust me, it’ll be like a breath of fresh air for her to not have to navigate social cues. Just say something like ‘Hey, I really like you, do you like me and do you want to go get a coffee sometime’? Start with that. Chao’s good people, the worst thing she’ll do is say no. She won’t yell at you or talk shit about you online. Buuuut, some sixth sense is telling me she won’t say no to getting some coffee with ya.”
Matt smiled. “McCoy, I think you might have a calling after you leave the military.”
She snorted. “Oh yeah, I’ll hang up my match-making shingle on the internet and start raking in the big bucks. Martinez is right, though. If we try to do a publicity stunt up at the Rithro, then we’ll need somebody alongside Chao to win the world over. Somebody well-known, but preferably someone not in the traditional Western pop-culture sphere. That’ll make it more palatable…”
Her voice trailed off and she stared into space. The two men now looked at each other in genuine concern until she spoke again a few moments later.
“Guys? I think I just had the best idea ever.”
submitted by Frank_Leroux to HFY [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 18:53 MossDerringer Wisdom Oak #19 Cast Iron Stove Restoration

Wisdom Oak #19 Cast Iron Stove Restoration submitted by MossDerringer to castiron [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 18:04 redditt-admin My (26M) gf(26F) was a major red flag that I failed to notice

Recently, I ended a four-year relationship that seemed perfect until it suddenly fell apart. To summarize the situation, my girlfriend had a previous one-year relationship before we met. When we got together, she was in the process of breaking up with him (he tried hard to convince her to stay, but she refused and we grew closer meanwhile). She used to share a lot of negative things about him, such as how he mistreated and ignored her. Eventually, they officially broke up after we started dating (in hindsight, I should have seen the red flags). She even met him twice to exchange belongings and gain closure, which I allowed.

Fast forward four years, I moved to another country for my studies. Initially, everything was going well, but then a guy entered her life. They lived in the same PG (paying guest accommodation) and became friends. Within a month, she started becoming distant from me, and we had constant fights and communication issues. Meanwhile, this new guy was constantly with her—having meals, going shopping, watching movies, and going on outings every weekend. At first, I dismissed the thought that this best friend could be a threat because I trusted her completely. However, during one of our fights, I warned her to stay away from him as I believed he was indirectly causing issues in our relationship, but she didn't listen. Finally, after almost six months of non-stop fights, she recently admitted that she has developed a crush and emotional attachment to him. I was devastated. She repeated the same pattern she had with her first boyfriend. It seemed that whoever was present in her life at that moment, she would fall in love with. It's not that she couldn't handle a long-distance relationship—we had been in one for two years due to COVID before I went abroad. Our relationship worked during that time because she was at home and there were no guys around to capture her attention. However, as soon as she moved to this new PG and made male friends, she shifted her focus to someone else. Moreover, this guy isn't even from the same caste or speaks the same language, yet she fell for him. This is ironic because the caste difference was a major obstacle in our relationship, and we were unsure if we could get married due to it.

In short, my ex-girlfriend has a tendency to become attached to anyone she spends time with. The worst part is that after giving my all in the relationship for four years, I didn't even get a proper goodbye. I told her many times that a specific date would be the last day of our contact and that I would block her afterward, but she didn't even say goodbye. I was treated poorly, and she moved on as if our relationship never existed. I curse her often, and sometimes it makes me feel better, but the pain and sadness still hit me like a truck at times. She even admitted that it wasn't my fault for the breakup, yet she treated me this way and denied me closure. Since I didn't get closure, I'm finding it difficult to move on.
submitted by redditt-admin to RelationshipIndia [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 17:57 tryna_write DO NOT TRESPASS ALONE

I parked in the tower's lot, letting my headlights bore into the amalgam of twisted metal and glass for a few moments before shutting them off.
Josh muttered, his voice low. "We're really doing this, huh?"
He ran a hand through his mop of curly hair— a dumb tic he developed last summer when his girlfriend, Annabeth, told him it was sexy. She was beside him now, cuddled up in the backseat across his lap.
I glanced at my own girlfriend, Ellie, in the passenger seat. She was trying her damndest to appear brave, but I knew better. There was no way she was comfortable with trespassing tonight.
I sighed, realizing that Josh would also chicken out.
"We're doing this? You sure you want to come?" I prodded.
Josh shifted in his seat, hand running through his hair yet again. "Maybe it's better if I stay in the truck.”
Annabeth shrugged next to him, unsurprised.
"Me, too,” Ellie chimed in, nodding at Josh.
Annabeth met my eyes, a glimmer of understanding passing between us. Our partners were both boring, god-awful goody two shoes.
"Pussies," I jabbed, swinging open my door without giving them a moment to respond.
Annabeth hopped out behind me, waving at the two losers in the truck before spinning towards me with a grin on her face.
"They're weird," she said, rolling her eyes.
For a moment, I was drinking in the way her golden hair shimmered in the moonlight. A light breeze tickled at our faces, sending sparkles of her moon-lit hair between us.
"Yup," I mustered.
I turned, strolling towards the chain link fence that formed a circular perimeter around the base of Sabe's Tower.
Sabe’s Tower. Thirteen stories of abandoned potential, whispering of times past when our town's inhabitants thought we'd hit a population boom, becoming the Houston of West Virginia. In the 70s, our success was tied to coal. Jobs flooded in, and with them, a myriad of people trying to make their way in life. Then the mines abruptly ran dry, decimating our town's economy. Since that time, our population has done nothing but dwindle.
Sabe’s Tower. Thirteen stories of decaying grandeur, silently rotting from the inside out. Some say that's what happened to Sabe himself— a rot took hold in his core, spreading and spreading until nothing but rot was left. In the end, he took his own life, which some say was for the best. He was a greedy fool, the wealthiest man for miles, owning half the surrounding countryside before the mining industry took off. Made a fortune selling his family's land to coal companies, putting every ounce of profit into making his towering hotel more luxurious than a Ritz Carlton.
Sabe’s Tower. Thirteen stories of failed dreams, now screaming vulgar obscenities at our eyes. It is a truly ugly behemoth, domineering our town's skyline with unmerited arrogance. Sabe thought painting the tower purple would give it an air of majesty, like royalties of the past, swaddled in silky lavender robes. His aspiration, after all, was nothing less than to emulate the sacred Tabernacle of Moses, to make his hotel a dwelling place for gods among men. In its current state of disrepair, however, the tower was no more than an eyesore— a visual cacophony of broken glass, peeling sickly-purple paint, and rusted steel inlays.
Adding to the hotel's disgrace, it was cylindrical in form, perched atop the highest peak for miles, jutting into the sky like a middle finger to the gods. Its phallic outline stood in stark contrast to the run-down strip malls lying in its wake.
The fence surrounding the tower was a bit too tall and a bit too wobbly to safely scale, so we circled, looking for an entry point. Every few yards, a DO NOT TRESPASS sign hung, tied to the fence with zip-ties in each corner. Someone had taken the liberty to spray paint a word underneath each sign, now making them all read:
DO NOT TRESPASS ALONE.
"Good thing you're coming with me," I joked, pointing at one of the signs.
Annabeth paused to read it for a moment. "Yeah... kinda weird that someone did that. I wonder why?"
I shrugged, continuing around the perimeter.
Eventually, we found a gate in the fence, held closed with chains at waist level. The gate's post careened steeply outward, creating a manageable gap near the top. The gate post was only held in place by the chains, not even slightly anchored to the ground. Without too much of a struggle, we hoisted ourselves up and through the gap.
Once inside the fence, I found myself spellbound by the abandoned hotel. The stars in the night sky reflected across the windows, bending and warping around the curved perimeter. Each glimmer of starlight turned into dizzying fractals, melding together and slipping between the shards of broken glass with each shift of my gaze.
The result was honestly breathtaking.
At night, the eyesoriffic tower was beautiful. Its silhouette dared to embrace the star-studded cosmos, standing with a quiet dignity that defied its daytime mockery.
I felt Annabeth shuffle beside me.
Suddenly, her phone flashlight was on, illuminating a path through overgrown concrete to the tower. At the end of the path was the structure’s entrance— a gaping hole with no attempt to conceal the darkness within.
"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!" I yelled, spinning to face her.
"W... What do you mean?" she stuttered.
"Turn that off, you idiot," I explained, lowering my voice. "Someone might see the light and call the cops."
The light flicked off, Annabeth mumbling apologies.
I blinked away the afterimage of weeds eating through the concrete lot, silently cursing myself for being so ridiculously hostile toward her.
"Sorry," I mumbled.
"You're good, Donovan" she whispered, brushing her hand across my arm.
As we continued to the open doorway, the outside of the tower came into focus. It was far further dilapidated than I had realized— each accent of purple paint, faded and peeling, was bulging out from between the glass and steel like it was trying to escape. I rubbed a fingernail on the paint, revealing a soft, rotting wood beneath.
I entered the tower first, pausing to let my eyes adjust. The darkness of the doorway opened up into an atrium that must have once made for a magnificent entrance. It was shaped like a slice of pie, us standing near the crust, peering inward toward the center. Above was pitch black, not yielding any answers to just how high up this mighty room's ceiling stretched.
The musty scent that filled my nose was surprisingly welcoming— somewhere between the smell of fishing trips and century old bookstores. I took a deep breath, relishing in the soft stench.
I could vaguely make out wires dangling down from the ceiling of the atrium. They were impossibly long, stretching upward into the infinite gloom.
"They look like vines," Annabeth whispered, her voice a soft purr.
The air was thick with falling dust, filtering down from the abyss above, twirling between the wires in satisfyingly slow-motion. The falling dust made it even harder to see in the dark, leaving the walls on either side of the room foggy blobs. I waved my hand, sending fleeting dust spirals through the air.
I remembered seeing photos of the atrium online, taken on some of the earliest digital cameras ever made. Those pictures showed marble countertops, intricate wooden carvings, and lushly carpeted floors.
The room, as it stands today, is a barren husk of Sabe's vision. The carpet, only present in scattered clumps, was impossibly dark, soiled to the point of true black. It clung to the concrete foundation, viciously holding on for dear life in a losing battle.
I bent down to examine a clump of carpet in front of me, amazed by the absence of light reflecting back. It was like staring into a pit of nothing, a vague absence, an outline of something that should be there.
I poked the toe of my boot at it.
FPOOSH.
It exploded, erupting into my face.
I gagged instinctively, tasting the vile substance mix into my lungs. Annabeth slapped my back as I continued gagging and coughing, begging the mucus to tear itself free from my lungs and just fucking get out of my body because it feels like I'm dying oh GOD.
And eventually, it did.
The violent hacking subsided into slight wretching, then was gone.
"Are you okay?" Annabeth tested.
Do you think I'm fucking okay?
"What the fuck was that?" I spewed.
She bent over the clump of carpet. Underneath the blackened top layer that just violently erupted was a pale network of matted spiderwebs.
"Hmm..." she began, "It kind of looks like mycelium."
She met my raised eyebrow with an eye roll.
"You know, like the roots of a fungus or some shit, I don't know. I just saw the shrooms growing in Bryce's closet that one time he showed me his stash. This white stuff looks just like it. So I guess that makes this black stuff like the part of the shroom we eat, or whatever."
"Oh dip," I responded, nodding. "That makes sense. One time I saw a nature show about some plants that shoot their seeds everywhere when something touches them. It's probably just spreading its spores when we touch it."
"Yeah," she breathed, "pretty gnarly."
We shuffled deeper into the gloom, weaving between dangling cables and clumps of fungus. I felt a drop of moisture flick off a cable, sliding onto my arm.
I groaned. "Fuck. That cable was wet."
"Disgusting," she whispered back.
We made our way to the apex of the room, the center of the tower, revealing a rusted set of elevator doors leaning together like drunks at a quinceanera. The doorway to the stairs, however, beckoned to us with the same unobstructed, pitch-black allure that the tower's entrance emanated just minutes before.
In the dark, it's truly amazing how utterly void all open doorways look.
Upon stepping inside the stairwell, the world vanished. The only proof of having working eyes was a faint, vertical glow of light filtering through the door, abruptly fading into all-consuming black.
Every sound in the entire building bored through my soul, bouncing from wall to wall, ceiling to floor, echoing on and on for all of eternity. The stairwell, directly in the center of the decrepit hotel, was the focal point of every creaking floorboard, every popping nail, every howling gust of wind. It was as if I was holding up a monstrous conch shell to my ear— a deafening murmur of echoes in disarray, smelting together to form satanic harmonies.
"Whoa," Annabeth mumbled.
Her word cut through the other echoes, impossibly loud against their monotonous hum.
Instantly, the echo of her voice filled the stairwell, rising like the build up of a dubstep song until peaking, impossibly overwhelming for a few brief seconds. The echoes of her voice then faded as quickly as they arrived.
She put a hand to her mouth, the whites of her eyes barely visible in the glow coming from the doorway.
I reached out, placing a hand where her shoulder should be. There was not enough space for us to stand abreast in the stairwell, leaving us in a comically squished proximity. She was breathing rapidly, barely managing to stay silent. I squeezed, and her breathing quickly slowed. I felt her hand creep onto mine, and we stood for a minute, simply listening to the cries of the dying building echo around us.
As my eyes adjusted, I could make out a staircase spiraling up the curved wall. Clearly this was a service stairwell, as it is much too cramped for the likes of Sabe's guests. Only a few steps were visible through the darkness at a time, making the staircase feel even tinier than it already was. Luckily, no fungus grew on the stairs themselves, leaving the metal alone to rust.
Annabeth shuffled onto the first step, producing a small object from her pocket. She handed it to me, then pointed up the stairwell, careful to not send echoes through the cylindrical chamber again.
I brought it close to my eyes for inspection, straining against the lack of light.
A joint...
She wants to go to the roof and smoke.
A smile cracked my lips. Classic Annabeth.
Every couple stairsteps, there would be a doorway. Most of them let in a dim glow, offering a glimpse into what must have once been a custodial closet on each floor.
On floor 9, I tugged at Annabeth's hand. We made eye contact in the faint light coming from the doorway. I motioned through it, pointing to the nearly fungus free floor. I wanted to explore at least a little bit, to see if the closet circled around the stairwell or not.
I poked my head through the doorway, freeing myself from the overwhelming cacophony of echoes in the stairwell.
I verified that the closet did, in fact, curve around the circular staircase like a donut. A few steps in one direction led to a terrifying drop— the elevator shaft. Next to it, a sidewalk sized ledge led to an open door, giving a view of the floor's main hallway. The path looked safe— no fungus, cracks, or otherwise obvious defects— so I proceeded, treading as light as a fox, fumbling for Annabeth's hand behind me.
The main hallway ran between the custodial closet and the guest rooms, creating another donut ring around the central stairwell. Throughout the hallway, patches of fungus grew alarmingly close together, threatening to overtake the concrete.
"That stairwell was insane," Annabeth whispered.
I nodded. "Fuck yeah, I wonder what it was like when the hotel was actually open. Must have been miserable for the staff."
We weaved through the fungus filled hallway, coming to room 901. I glanced at Annabeth, raising my eyebrows. The door was slightly ajar, hanging from its one remaining door hinge. I pushed gently, eliciting a monstrous creak.
The room was empty, extending away to the outside in a familiar pie shape. The mold seemed to grow thinner in the room, leaving most of the exposed concrete safe to cross. At the far side, a floor to ceiling panel of windows looked out over our town.
I gasped, taking in the view. Never before had I seen our town from this high up. My eyes drew to the smokestacks by the river, their blinking lights ominously flickering over downtown. Individual streets ran in parallel lines away from the tower, lit with yellowing streetlights. Between the roads, tiny lights cast from window panes twinkled, blending with one another into a starscape of their own.
"Dude," I said. "Look at this."
No response.
I spun, looking for Annabeth, frantically scanning the room. My eyes had adjusted to the outside light, leaving me sightless.
"Annabeth," I hissed.
A cold tingle went up my spine, pulling at hairs on the back of my neck.
"Annabeth?"

Silence.

Silence.

Silence.

I crept back across the floor, now aware of the entire room at once. There was nowhere for her to be hiding. No desks, cans of paint, ladders, nothing. Just an empty room with patchy fungus growing on the cement.
Something must have happened.
I studied each fungal growth in the room as I passed by. Even with the light cast from the windows, the tops remained impossibly dark. Not a single feature was discernible— only an outline was visible.
Halfway to the door, a three foot wide hole led straight to floor 8. I could have sworn it wasn't there before. I peered into the opening, seeing straight through to the room below. From what I could see, it was identically empty.
"Annabeth," I tried again, nearing the door to the hallway.
"BOO!"
I stumbled backward, tripping over my own feet. I landed squarely on a patch of fungus.
FPOOSH.
I remembered to hold my breath, close my eyes, and plug my nose.
Annabeth cackled from the threshold of the doorway, standing over me with both hands on her forehead.
"You should have seen the look—" she began, breaking off into another fit of laughter.
"Shut up," I groaned, pushing to my feet. My entire body was covered in squishy fungus gunk. I pointed at the hole behind me, continuing. "You could have killed me."
"Blah, blah, blah," she mocked. "You're fine... you're just being a baby."
Annabeth gave me a playful shove, hands lingering for a moment overdue. Swatting her paws off me, I marched back to the stairwell. I led the rest of the way to floor 13, followed by her snickers.
As I reached the top of the stairs and stepped onto the 13th floor, my jaw dropped. It was a scene straight out of a surrealist painting. An enormous pool room lay before us. Glass walls extended up from the tile floors, creating a massive, clear domed perimeter. A swath of stars twinkled brilliantly through the clear ceiling, their light refracting through the glass, casting ethereal patterns onto the room's otherwise bleak surroundings.
The pool itself was a semi-circular cutout covering half the floor space, starting at ground level and deepening in a corkscrew motion. Its ceramic tiles, once probably a bright blue, were now tinged with patches of the same fungal growth we had come across on the lower floors. The growth was sparse here, though, letting the original floor design take prominence.
In the center of the room— on top of the staircase we just stepped out of— stood a circular pillar that extended up to the middle of the glass dome, like a spine holding up the entire tower. A small antenna jutted out from above the pillar atop the dome. Surrounding the antenna was a low fence, perhaps a safety measure for maintenance workers.
Annabeth, having finally contained her laughter, stepped beside me, her face illuminated by the soft starlight filtering in through the dome. She too stood silent, taken aback by the unexpected beauty of this forgotten space.
As we moved around the room, our steps echoed across the vast emptiness. With every patch of fungus we passed, the same eerie darkness hovered, the undulating mold standing stark against the ceramic tiles.
We made our way back to the central pillar. A ladder, carved into the pillar, connected to the glass ceiling with a trapdoor.
"To the roof?" Annabeth sang, rubbing her hands together in a goblin-like motion.
"Ladies first."
As she climbed above me, I couldn't help but crane my neck and drool. She slammed open the trapdoor, and we burst through to the roof.
The fenced-in area was covered with a dark spongy surface, gripping at my knees when I stood up. Wind whipped around us, carrying a chill that cut through my clothes and bit into my skin. With each gust, the antenna above us groaned and swayed, almost as if it were joining in a dance with an unseen partner.
We sat on the squishy rubber surface, comfortably in silence. I met her eyes, smiling dumbly. We passed the joint back and forth until it dwindled down, its ember glow flickering one last time before extinguishing completely. A familiar haze crawled through my thoughts, slowing the passage of time to a languishing crawl.
"Hey..." she started, "I think I've finally found inspiration for my next album."
I scooted closer to her, taking her hand. I knew the topic brought about an unusual timidity in her— a blemish in the badass persona she's so keen on presenting. She won't even talk to her own boyfriend about her music career.
"Yeah?" I floated.
She hesitated for a second, settling into the moment. I felt a tug at my crotch, suddenly all too aware of how pretty she looked in the moonlight. I took in every detail— the way her hair fell across her face, the pattern of her freckles, the soft speckling of stars reflecting across her eyes.
"I think you need to take off your shirt, first, though," she whispered, now inches from my face. "You're filthy."
I glanced down, remembering the fungal gunk that had soiled my clothes when she scared me.
Without warning, her hands slid under my shirt, warm and sure. I helped her yank it off, collapsing into her lips.
***
When we got back to the truck, I was still high enough to see everything in slow motion. Before pulling out of the parking lot, Annabeth and I regurgitated the events of our urban exploration, trying to show our significant others what fun they missed out on. It goes without saying that part of the story was intentionally omitted.
Ellie and Josh were unamused. Their lack of adventure will forever be a mystery to me.
We swung out of the lot, hopping onto the highway headed into town. I swayed between lanes, struggling to keep the double-yellow lines in focus.
"Are you sure you're good to drive?" Ellie asked, gripping the armrest.
"I'm fine," I slurred.
Seconds later, another truck materialized in front of us. I swerved to avoid it, then everything went black.
***
I woke up to a strong hand pulling me out of the window. My truck was upside down, the roof completely caved in.
I groaned. "Aww... fuck...."
The person who pulled me out looked like the kind of guy to chew tobacco and spit wisdom. His fishing cap cast a deep shadow across his eyes in the moon's glow, concealing his gaze. He was an old timer, that's for sure, one of those folk who came during the coal rush and decided to stay when all was said and done. I could see his truck— the same truck I saw moments before the crash— pulled into the shoulder of the highway with its blinkers on.
"Easy now," he reassured, his voice like gravel under a boot. "Anyone else inside?"
I nodded, unable to speak.
I plopped onto the grassy slope embarking off the side of the road. The old man pulled their mangled bodies out, one by one.
The countryside shrank around me. I felt the corners of my vision pulling in, the weed in my system straining the limits of shock I could take before melting down.
"I'm sorry, son," he whispered, his voice carrying the weight of my guilt. "The police will be here soon. Don't you worry."
The police.
I stood up. I knew exactly how the police treated people with my skin color in this town.
I ran.
"Hey now!" the man hollered.
I kept running.
Away from my truck, away from my dead friends, away from the police.
I ran until my breath came in ragged, uncontrollable huffs. I flopped to the ground, laying on the cool concrete, cradling my head with my hands. Blood flowed between my fingertips, pooling onto the pavement.
I laid there until police sirens wailed through the night, rapidly approaching. They stopped at the wreck, leaving me in silence. Moments later, the sirens picked up their mournful song again, heading toward me.
I sat up.
I was back in the lot of Sabe's Tower. Only then did I realize how little distance I really ran from the wreck— a couple hundred yards at most.
Four, five, maybe even six sirens filled the air. They were all coming for me. They knew what I had done.
I bolted from my position on the concrete. I could hide in the tower. No way the cops would look for me in that rotting place. They wouldn't dare.
I squeezed through the gap in the fence, same as before, vaulting past the
DO NOT TRESPASS ALONE
signs in a fluid lunge. The sirens behind me screamed into the night, melding together into a continuous doomsday chant.
Red and blue lights filled the lot. I hit the ground right in front of the gaping entrance to the tower, praying that the weeds poking through the concrete would be enough to mask my form. I army crawled, inch by inch, dragging myself across broken bottles and plywood shrapnell, until I was safely in the darkness of the tower.
In.
Out.
I breathed.
In.
Out.
A police cruiser parked in the lot. Its siren drowned out all other wails for a moment before shutting off. A chubby white officer hopped out, surveying the scene. His gaze came to rest on the spot where I had lain. He squatted down, raking a finger through the pool of blood I left behind. He took a few steps toward the tower, squatting down yet again. Another splotch of blood, no doubt.
His voice floated through the plaza, slightly nasal and a little out of breath. "Dispatch, this is officer Chetty, badge number 741. I'm on the scene at 1019 Pleasant Valley Lane, in the lot of Sabe's Tower. I've located a pool of fresh blood that may be linked to our hit-and-run suspect. Possible injury, suspect could be close. Requesting immediate backup and forensics for evidence collection."
Fuck.
I wormed my way further into the tower's belly, sliding between patches of fungus like a mouse in a snake pit, heading for the stairwell. I had to ascend, to find some nook or cranny out of reach of the pursuing officers. The godforsaken tower was one big game of hide and seek, only this time, losing meant far worse than a bruised ego.
Something gurgled in the darkness.
My blood froze. I halted, my heart hammering a tattoo against my ribs. Holding my breath, I strained my senses, eyes peering into the graying murk, searching for the source of the sound.
It came again, a wretched retching, like an animal choking on its own vomit. Hacking, gurgling, bubbling wetness bursting through strained vocal chords, a sound of fading vitality. It was coming from near the door, just outside the meager halo of light slipping through the hole.
A wet line smeared across the back of my neck. A yelp escaped my lips before I realized it was just a cord dangling from the ceiling.
At my yelp, the gurgling paused.
A heavy hush fell over the place, the quietude of the hunted.
I could faintly make out echoes emanating from the stairwell, only a few feet behind me.
The gurgling continued, sucking at the thick air. It began to drag itself forward through the fungus covered floor— a slow, steady, rhythmic drag against the concrete.
FPOOSH.
A geyser of spores bloomed, mingling with swirls of dust in the meager light. The creature, or whatever it was, did not slow its approach. Out of the darkness, a form began to shape— a silhouette clawing its way toward me.
FPOOSH.
I could see this eruption envelop the mass on the floor. One hand appeared, then another. Its fingers scrabbled over the concrete, searching for any purchase to grip. They flexed, heaving the thing even closer.
A mop of curly hair appeared between the hands. A body, face down. It pulled itself closer, into another fungal growth, grinding its face through the rough concrete.
FPOOSH.
A knife protruded from its back. The handle jutted upward, a grim totem amidst the grime and gore. I shuddered, involuntarily taking a step closer to the stairwell.
It looked up at me.
Or rather, Josh looked up at me.
I stared back, mouth agape.
His face was nearly sanded off from the concrete. His nose took the worst of it, ground down to the bone, leaving only two sucking, gurgling holes between his eyes. His cheeks were a mangled mess of blood and rocks, viscous red flowing freely to the tip of his chin before dribbling off. The chunks of meat hanging where lips should have been flapped against his teeth with every jerky motion, tethered to his face by all too little strands of flesh. Beneath them, his teeth showed bright red and white in a perpetual grimacing smile.
"Josh?" I managed to whisper, my voice a frightened squeak.
Josh opened his mouth as if to respond, ripping both cheeks in half. He hacked, gurgling, spitting up blood that came from deep within his torso. He slowly cocked his head to the side, but instead of stopping at a slant, he kept twisting his neck until bones started to crack and his head dangled upside down.
His mangled, upside down head swung limply as he pulled himself to his knees, his neck like jelly. He wasn't wearing the same clothes he was wearing earlier tonight— no, he was wearing clothes from the night Annabeth first cheated on him with me. He was at a Villanova game, supporting his favorite team since birth. Annabeth knew he would be gone for the weekend, so we took our chance. I was still at her place when he came back, wearing his Collin Gillespie jersey and reeking of beer.
Now in front of me, his prized jersey was in tatters, torn to ribbons by the concrete. He groaned, shuffling and reaching for me with bloody fingers.
I bolted into the stairwell, taking the steps two at a time. I pushed myself faster and faster until the door to floor 9 loomed to my side. I didn't pause for a moment, pushed forward by the gurgling echoes reverberating from below.
My thighs, weak from the frantic climb, begged for a break. I wobbled into the hallway, painfully tip-toeing through the fungus. The door to 901 beckoned ahead, hanging open like it had been awaiting my hasty return.
I stumbled over the threshold when Annabeth's singing filled the room. "Oh, Donovan!"
I froze.
Outlined against the window was a two-headed beast. One face belonged to Annabeth, the other to Ellie. The creature swayed, an obscene dance of bare, fused flesh. It wore no clothes, as if to mock God himself. It had two sets of everything— eight appendages total, like a humanoid arachnid. Annabeth's breasts, now side by side with Ellie's, put Ellie to shame, even now.
Annabeth crooned again, "Oh, Donovan!" each syllable laced with acid and honey. The sound made my skin crawl as it floated through the silent room.
"You always did want more, didn't you Donovan?" Ellie sneered, a harsh grin splitting her face.
Annabeth spat, "More than Ellie could give. More than anyone could give."
The thing dropped to the floor with a thud. All eight limbs moved in unison as it crawled.
"Isn't this what you wanted? Both of us at the same time?" Their voices tumbled over each other, mouths moving in synchrony. Together, their laughter filled the hollow room. "Don't you like the thrill, Donovan? Don't you like playing with fire?"
The thing scurried at me, jumping over fungal growths with powerful leaps. The sudden movement broke my paralyzation, spurring my legs to action. I darted into the closet and through the stairwell door, into the gurgling echoes.
Back down the stairwell I ran, the two headed beast in pursuit. Both girls snarled, hindered by their conjoined size in the narrow passageway. Their struggle echoed through the stairwell, mixing with the gurgling. I fled further down, needing to put distance between that thing and me.
I stopped dead in my tracks between floors 2 and 3.
Josh was there, leaning against the wall with the knife removed from his back, now grasped tightly in his hand. I staggered back up the stairs, instinctively retreating, narrowly avoiding the blade as he lunged at me.
Glancing up, I caught a flash of pale skin bearing down on me, cutting off my escape. My only way out was the door to floor 3. I charged through the closet, leaving the echoes behind me.
Floor 3 was empty— no walls, only fungus and windows. The atrium loomed to my left, a pie shaped hole missing from the floor and ceiling. I backed away from the door, eyeing the dangling cords hanging in the atrium.
Maybe... Just maybe....
Josh stumbled from the stairwell, filling the air with his wet slurping. Annabeth and Ellie followed, scrambling toward me.
I didn't have time to think.
I jumped, grasping at the dangling wires, praying they would hold my weight.
Time stuttered, hanging suspended like an icicle on a winter's morning. The world spun in a dizzying blur as I twisted, fingers stretching for a grip. Panic clawed its icy fingers up my spine, but it was the surprise that struck me most. The simple disbelief that this was happening.
A wire found its way into my hand, snapping without slowing my fall.
The wind whooshed past, ripping the breath from my lungs. Above me, the third floor retreated, its grimy concrete replaced by a view of the atrium's ceiling, wires swinging back and forth from my desperate escape.
Then came the sensation of falling. It's a feeling that strikes a primal chord, an orchestra of fear and adrenaline that means the end of a life. My stomach lurched, free-falling alongside me, while the rest of my body seemed to hover in a state of disbelief.
The impact came as both a shock and an inevitability. There was a moment of sheer, undiluted pain, a soundless scream reverberating through my very bones. It felt like being shattered from the inside out, an explosion of agony that started from my back and radiated outwards. An iron-hot spike of pain shot through me, and then, a chilling void as everything below my waist slipped into a terrifying numbness.
The echo of my body's collision rang in my ears as the world spun into a disorienting whirl of blurs, shadows, and pain. The cold concrete beneath me felt real, solid, a chilling contrast to the sudden loss of sensation in my legs.
In the throbbing silence that followed, I understood. I had fallen. I was broken. I lay sprawled on the atrium floor, gasping, the world tilting dangerously in my vision.
Annabeth and Ellie emerged from the staircase, scrambling across the atrium floor. Red and blue police lights filtered through the tower’s windows, making shadows dance between the monster's eight limbs. Josh wasn't far behind, still clutching onto the bloody knife, head rolling upside down between his shoulders.
"Police, we're coming in!" a familiar nasally voice shouted.
The moment officers stepped foot in the tower, the monsters vanished in a spray of spores.

X
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2023.06.03 17:17 Proletlariet Spyro

Hold your horns, here comes Spyro!
Spyro the Dragon is, as the name suggests, a young dragon. Over the course of the series, he goes on many adventures. That's basically everything.
This RT only covers the classic timeline, and not The Legend of Spyro or Skylanders.

Dragon Breath

General Strength
Fire Breath
One of Spyro's most notable abilities is breathing fire. Metal enemies are resistant to fire, but can be defeated by charging, while enemies that are too big to be charged can be knocked down with a fire attack (as seen here)
Ice Breath
Originally, Spyro could only breathe frost with a superfreeze powerup, or altering the magic that lets him breathe fire, but in later games he gained the ability to breathe it naturally.
Electric Breath
Originally, Spyro could only use electric breath (also known as "lightning breath") with a powerup, but later gained the ability to breathe it naturally. It's effective on metal enemies and objects
Wind Breath
Spyro has the ability to breathe out powerful gusts of wind.
Water Breath
Spyro has the ability to breath out a spray of water. Unlike his other breath attacks, he cannot injure enemies with this, only push them back
Other

Magic and Equipment

Superflame
With a fairy's kiss, or another special powerup, Spyro temporarily gains the Superflame ability. This allows him to breathe fire which is more powerful than his regular flame breath. It can either be breathed like normal, or be shot like a projectile, depending on the game.
Supercharge
Spyro can supercharge on special supercharge ramps (or with the help of special gates), allowing for a much faster and more powerful charge. Spyro runs so fast in this form he burns with red, then purple fire, and can smash a type of chest which he is incapable of charging through normally
Wing Shield
Spyro has the power to shield himself with his wings and reflect attacks. It can reflect blunt objects but not piercing attacks
Shadow Amulet
The Shadow Amulet is a powerful artifact which can refine and focus Spyro's magic
Weapons
Vehicles
Other

Sparx

Sparx is the dragonfly that follows Spyro, helping and protecting him, usually by collecting gems for him. His color changes depending on his health. He can also point in the direction of nearby gems.
Shooting
Butterflies
Abilities

Strength

Charging
Headbashing
Spitting
Other

Agility

Mobility
Movement
Other

Durability

Blunt Force
Explosive
Temperature
Swallowing and Spitting
Other

Skill

Hockey Skill
Combat Skill
Misc Skill
"I thought that dragons had all been dead for a thousand years, or something."
"Well, the rumors about our extinction were slightly exaggerated."
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2023.06.03 16:50 Sven-Ost Low Carb Sweet & Sour Chicken

Low Carb Sweet & Sour Chicken
Low Carb Sweet & Sour Chicken
Per 1.2 Pound Serving, it will have 467 Calories, 32g Fats, 3.9g Net Carbs, and 49g Protein.
The Preparation Chicken: • 5-6 Small Boneless Chicken Breasts • 2 Large Eggs, Beaten • 1 Cup Crushed Pork Rinds • 1/2 Cup Almond Flour • 1/3 Cup Parmesan Cheese • 2 Tbsp. Olive Oil • 1 Tbsp. Coconut Oil • 1 tsp. Kosher Salt • 1 tsp. Freshly Ground Black Pepper
Sweet & Sour Sauce: • 1/2 Cup Erythritol • 1/2 Cup Rice Vinegar • 4 Tbsp. Reduced Sugar Ketchup • 1 Tbsp. Soy Sauce • 1 tsp. Garlic Powder
The Execution Stovetop [Method 1] 1. Cut chicken into cubes. Combine all the coating ingredients in a food processor and then coat the chicken by dipping into egg and then into the pork rind crumbs. 2. Cook chicken in batches in a cast iron skillet over medium heat. 3. Reduce sauce in a pan while chicken is cooking. 4. Coat chicken with sauce and mix together.
Oven [Method 2] 5. Preheat oven to 325F. 6. Cube chicken breasts, cut off any excess bits. 7. Crush pork rinds and add almond flour, salt, pepper, and parmesan cheese. 8. 1 Bowl with beaten eggs, 1 bowl with pork rind mixture. 9. Heat pan with 1 Tbsp. Olive Oil and 1 Tbsp. Coconut Oil. 10. Dip chicken cubes in egg mixture and then pork rind mixture. 11. Fast fry chicken and transfer to baking pan, add more olive oil as needed. 12. Mix sauce together and pour over chicken. Bake for 60 minutes, flipping the chicken every 15 minutes.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/ketodietandintermittentfastingforbeginners/?ref=share
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2023.06.03 16:48 Sven-Ost Low Carb Sweet & Sour Chicken

Low Carb Sweet & Sour Chicken
Low Carb Sweet & Sour Chicken
Per 1.2 Pound Serving, it will have 467 Calories, 32g Fats, 3.9g Net Carbs, and 49g Protein.
The Preparation Chicken: • 5-6 Small Boneless Chicken Breasts • 2 Large Eggs, Beaten • 1 Cup Crushed Pork Rinds • 1/2 Cup Almond Flour • 1/3 Cup Parmesan Cheese • 2 Tbsp. Olive Oil • 1 Tbsp. Coconut Oil • 1 tsp. Kosher Salt • 1 tsp. Freshly Ground Black Pepper
Sweet & Sour Sauce: • 1/2 Cup Erythritol • 1/2 Cup Rice Vinegar • 4 Tbsp. Reduced Sugar Ketchup • 1 Tbsp. Soy Sauce • 1 tsp. Garlic Powder
The Execution Stovetop [Method 1] 1. Cut chicken into cubes. Combine all the coating ingredients in a food processor and then coat the chicken by dipping into egg and then into the pork rind crumbs. 2. Cook chicken in batches in a cast iron skillet over medium heat. 3. Reduce sauce in a pan while chicken is cooking. 4. Coat chicken with sauce and mix together.
Oven [Method 2] 5. Preheat oven to 325F. 6. Cube chicken breasts, cut off any excess bits. 7. Crush pork rinds and add almond flour, salt, pepper, and parmesan cheese. 8. 1 Bowl with beaten eggs, 1 bowl with pork rind mixture. 9. Heat pan with 1 Tbsp. Olive Oil and 1 Tbsp. Coconut Oil. 10. Dip chicken cubes in egg mixture and then pork rind mixture. 11. Fast fry chicken and transfer to baking pan, add more olive oil as needed. 12. Mix sauce together and pour over chicken. Bake for 60 minutes, flipping the chicken every 15 minutes.
submitted by Sven-Ost to A_Healthy_LifeStyle [link] [comments]