Mental health journal prompts pdf
Prompts and motivation to create something out of nothing
2010.09.08 00:52 Prompts and motivation to create something out of nothing
Writing Prompts. You're a writer and you just want to flex those muscles? You've come to the right place! If you see a prompt you like, simply write a short story based on it. Get comments from others, and leave commentary for other people's works. Let's help each other.
2012.02.24 09:14 Connecting Food, Eating, Body and Mind
Pro-recovery space for bulimia, binge eating, restricting, anorexia and other disordered eating patterns. You are welcome here.
2016.10.22 04:58 The Teachings of Neville Goddard
Devoted to the teachings of Neville Goddard.
2023.06.03 23:54 BarryHuskies Think I’ve royally fucked up
My ex gf left me 3 weeks ago (post on my profile for full back story) after a family holiday. It was absolutely horrendous, we didn’t have a face to face chat just her ranting at me in the car from the airport. But her reasons were basically “I was miserable all holiday, didn’t make an effort with her son or parents, I lied to her about my mental health but told her mum, being together 24/7 she saw the real me & didn’t want her life to be like that” I didn’t agree with any of this but was not able to even get my point across without her saying I’m twisting her words or that I’m a narcissist. (I’m really not)
I’ve watched so many videos and read posts here about no contact, but I convinced myself that only works if you’ve discussed the breakup/ended on decent terms/there’s no kid involved etc which doesn’t apply here. I have bad anxiety and because I’ve had no chance to talk to her, and she blocked me etc & I’m being made out to be things I’m not it has all blown up in my head.
I just could not understand why she’s saying these things and treating me this way, when all through the relationship I’ve busted my ass to show I’m serious about her & her son. I thought there’s no way I can have all this in my head for however long we don’t talk & I can’t cope with it. I’ve messaged tonight basically saying that I needed to clear the air, I haven’t lied & this is what I told her mum, I do genuinely care about her and her son, didn’t want this to happen etc etc you get the gist.
10 minutes later I got a text from her dad saying leave her alone, she doesn’t want to speak, she won’t change her mind, there’s no future between us etc.
Have I just blown any chance I may have? :( I just couldn’t see NC working for me & everything was eating away at me. I’m not a bad guy & haven’t harassed her or sent anything abusive or threatening, just a nice message apologising really and I’m met with such hostility.
submitted by BarryHuskies to ExNoContact [link] [comments]
I’ve watched so many videos and read posts here about no contact, but I convinced myself that only works if you’ve discussed the breakup/ended on decent terms/there’s no kid involved etc which doesn’t apply here. I have bad anxiety and because I’ve had no chance to talk to her, and she blocked me etc & I’m being made out to be things I’m not it has all blown up in my head.
I just could not understand why she’s saying these things and treating me this way, when all through the relationship I’ve busted my ass to show I’m serious about her & her son. I thought there’s no way I can have all this in my head for however long we don’t talk & I can’t cope with it. I’ve messaged tonight basically saying that I needed to clear the air, I haven’t lied & this is what I told her mum, I do genuinely care about her and her son, didn’t want this to happen etc etc you get the gist.
10 minutes later I got a text from her dad saying leave her alone, she doesn’t want to speak, she won’t change her mind, there’s no future between us etc.
Have I just blown any chance I may have? :( I just couldn’t see NC working for me & everything was eating away at me. I’m not a bad guy & haven’t harassed her or sent anything abusive or threatening, just a nice message apologising really and I’m met with such hostility.
2023.06.03 23:52 TheSmellOfColon Just hit the one month mark!
I am down 9 lbs! I'm assuming it's all water weight right now because my body doesn't look *too* different, but I cannot be happier with the benefits that I've had the last 4 weeks!
My SW is 133lbs, I don't really have a specific goal weight I'd say, as I'm wanting to lose fat, but gain some weight back in muscle. Once I hit my goal appearance, I'm thinking of doing keto at a maintenance level until early next year (when my LDR boyfriend moves in with me), but I really wouldn't mind doing it for longer. It's been extremely beneficial.
Here are some of my findings in the the first month of doing keto:
I've been on this sub every day and I read through everyone's questions and answers as much as possible to keep learning. This is such a wonderful community and I just wanted to give thanks to each and every one of you for your help on this journey :)
submitted by TheSmellOfColon to keto [link] [comments]
My SW is 133lbs, I don't really have a specific goal weight I'd say, as I'm wanting to lose fat, but gain some weight back in muscle. Once I hit my goal appearance, I'm thinking of doing keto at a maintenance level until early next year (when my LDR boyfriend moves in with me), but I really wouldn't mind doing it for longer. It's been extremely beneficial.
Here are some of my findings in the the first month of doing keto:
- My love for food and cooking has been reignited. I've been struggling with binge eating/purging and having a terrible relationship with food for the last 4 years. I'm now eating things like chicken wings, chicken thighs, steak, bacon, cheese, chicharron, chicken skin and eggs. I used to eat strictly egg whites and chicken breast when I was doing low carb & low fat. At first, I was honestly really worried about tracking again as it's such a slippery slope for me, but I've been planning out my meals and tracking everything just fine. My mental health surrounding food has been so much better.
- I've been sleeping like a fricken baby. I fall asleep within minutes of my head hitting the pillow, and I feel so well rested when I wake up.
- Grocery shopping is way more streamlined. I have my list for the week, I'm in and out, and not spending money on random snacks.
- My skin looks soooo good because of all the water I'm drinking.
- Speaking of water, I've never used Mio before since I like good ol' regular water, and I started using the blueberry lemonade Mio for my ketoade.
- I'm way less hungry and fasting is much easier. I eat between 12:00 pm and ~6:30 pm and I don't often find the need to snack.
- I'm eating the most whole foods ever in my life.
- I've never had such a positive and fun outlook on a big lifestyle change.
I've been on this sub every day and I read through everyone's questions and answers as much as possible to keep learning. This is such a wonderful community and I just wanted to give thanks to each and every one of you for your help on this journey :)
2023.06.03 23:51 B1tchBetterGetMyCash Can you relate?...
My voices have been around like my trauma for many years. An anomaly, doctor's found it strange I developed schizophrenia young.
So I was studied a few years. Through development of PTSD. I was diagnosis with anxiety, MPD, anxiety, and (bipolar) schizophrenia.
I have grown used to all these, but I still hate my voices. I have gained more control with my mental system. But...
I have no friends (barely), no bf, because I left everything to focus on my mental health , and prosperity. The voices make me feel inadequate. Although I'm doing very well...
They mess with my weaker alters, my persona in public is composed and I'm well spoken but they target my newer one younger ones.
Schizophrenia is scary for some of them cause I'm always anxious. I see things, remember things, they can be so loud ( If you've read this far thank you.)
I just wish I didn't have so many disorders, sometimes I wish I wasn't born. I was meant to be aborted because the doctor's, my father's family, and other medical providers said I might not survive.
Well I survived just with so many things wrong...
I wish I could relate to someone, have a friend who understands why I'm like this. I can't be alone forever with surface level understanding. I feel like I have my persona, my alters, and voices... That's all.
I feel I've never impacted anyone, or been useful. I hate that that's the one thing my voices are right about... 🥀
submitted by B1tchBetterGetMyCash to schizophrenia [link] [comments]
So I was studied a few years. Through development of PTSD. I was diagnosis with anxiety, MPD, anxiety, and (bipolar) schizophrenia.
I have grown used to all these, but I still hate my voices. I have gained more control with my mental system. But...
I have no friends (barely), no bf, because I left everything to focus on my mental health , and prosperity. The voices make me feel inadequate. Although I'm doing very well...
They mess with my weaker alters, my persona in public is composed and I'm well spoken but they target my newer one younger ones.
Schizophrenia is scary for some of them cause I'm always anxious. I see things, remember things, they can be so loud ( If you've read this far thank you.)
I just wish I didn't have so many disorders, sometimes I wish I wasn't born. I was meant to be aborted because the doctor's, my father's family, and other medical providers said I might not survive.
Well I survived just with so many things wrong...
I wish I could relate to someone, have a friend who understands why I'm like this. I can't be alone forever with surface level understanding. I feel like I have my persona, my alters, and voices... That's all.
I feel I've never impacted anyone, or been useful. I hate that that's the one thing my voices are right about... 🥀
2023.06.03 23:51 YourParadise98 Finally trying to get back on track
This past weekend, I had one of the most intense mental breakdowns I've had since I was seventeen and struggling. I won't go into detail, but it wound up with me needing surgery on my hand this coming Monday, with a recovery time of 3 weeks for arm function, and 18 months for nerve function. I'm very scared of all of that, but know I have a support network that can get me through it.
The day after it happened I scheduled my first therapy appointment in nearly 4 years and just had that this past Wednesday. We didn't really talk about much, but I already feel lighter than I did at the beginning of the week. It feels like a start on actually finally working towards getting better again after feeling as though I had just been stagnant for two years.
I've also been considering getting back on medication. I haven't been on any since I was seventeen or eighteen, but it's beginning to feel like it may be useful, in the short term, for me to actually get started on what needs to be done to get better. If anyone has any advice on what medications have worked best for them in the past for major depressive disorder as well as generalized anxiety disorder, I would really appreciate it. Most of the medications I was on back in high school and junior high made me feel like a zombie, which is why getting back on it is only a thought at this point. I may try practicing meditation and mindfulness for a while in hopes that it helps clear my head, prior to really taking meds into consideration. (I'm REALLY hoping this one follows rule 7 but can delete this section if it doesn't)
Now I have to work on getting my hours cut down from 60 hours and 6 days weekly to 40 hours over 5 days at most. I've gotta get rid of that part of the problem for me to really start feeling better again. The burnout of the last two years of working these hours has absolutely hurt me in a way I didn't think possible, and has made existing very hard. I feel like I never have energy or time to do things for myself (probably because I don't).
Not really sure why I felt the need to post all of this, but thank you for reading it to the end if you have. I would appreciate any advice anyone has to give me in regards to this little journey I have in front of me, whether it's how to deal with wearing a cast for a while and existing normally (this has actually been difficult with even just a wrap on, but that might be because of where I am with the healing process) or the mental health part of it. I can absolutely use all the help I can get.
submitted by YourParadise98 to mentalhealth [link] [comments]
The day after it happened I scheduled my first therapy appointment in nearly 4 years and just had that this past Wednesday. We didn't really talk about much, but I already feel lighter than I did at the beginning of the week. It feels like a start on actually finally working towards getting better again after feeling as though I had just been stagnant for two years.
I've also been considering getting back on medication. I haven't been on any since I was seventeen or eighteen, but it's beginning to feel like it may be useful, in the short term, for me to actually get started on what needs to be done to get better. If anyone has any advice on what medications have worked best for them in the past for major depressive disorder as well as generalized anxiety disorder, I would really appreciate it. Most of the medications I was on back in high school and junior high made me feel like a zombie, which is why getting back on it is only a thought at this point. I may try practicing meditation and mindfulness for a while in hopes that it helps clear my head, prior to really taking meds into consideration. (I'm REALLY hoping this one follows rule 7 but can delete this section if it doesn't)
Now I have to work on getting my hours cut down from 60 hours and 6 days weekly to 40 hours over 5 days at most. I've gotta get rid of that part of the problem for me to really start feeling better again. The burnout of the last two years of working these hours has absolutely hurt me in a way I didn't think possible, and has made existing very hard. I feel like I never have energy or time to do things for myself (probably because I don't).
Not really sure why I felt the need to post all of this, but thank you for reading it to the end if you have. I would appreciate any advice anyone has to give me in regards to this little journey I have in front of me, whether it's how to deal with wearing a cast for a while and existing normally (this has actually been difficult with even just a wrap on, but that might be because of where I am with the healing process) or the mental health part of it. I can absolutely use all the help I can get.
2023.06.03 23:51 Pretty_lonely_tree Considering going off grid
I'm a mother. I'm not a mom. I didn't want children. My children may think I am because I play the part when I am around. Maybe it makes me a horrible person. I know I am. I'm not in love with their father. During my first pregnancy he forced me to sleep with someone due to his kink, made it an ultimatum. Wanted to abort my second child because I got pregnant on birth control. He convinced me not to. During my post partum struggles, he made me a tinder. Set up a few dates once again with ultimatums of leaving me and I would have nothing. I found friendship in one of them and things actually hit it off naturally. And this person I fell in love with. Shit happens and it did. And I fell in love with the life I could've had. Without kids. Without the struggle, I broke up with my children's father. And now I'm alone. Completely. Being forced to live in this house with children I have learned to be careful around because I'm scared of myself. Mental health crisis 101. I stop myself from going past the breaking point every day. I'm tired and I have horrible children. I cry every day and it hurts and I'm tired. Their father gets home from his work trip at the end of June and has agreed to let me give up my rights and I think I might and just go off grid almost completely in my beat up car til everyone forgets me and I can finally kill myself
submitted by Pretty_lonely_tree to SuicideWatch [link] [comments]
2023.06.03 23:50 Rednidedni A complete breakdown of spellcasters and why they're fantastic
 | There's been this looming ghost of martial classes and spellcasters being compared to eachother, and the repeated quiet sentiments that the latter are just... sub-par. So, in a vain attempt to end the doubt for at least some people, I've decided to hop right into the ring and lay out in detail how exactly this part of the game has been carefully designed, how the math behind it ticks, what the little quirks and asterisks are, and why spellcasters are ultimately powerhouses and in an overall fantastic spot right now. submitted by Rednidedni to Pathfinder2e [link] [comments] On Martials You always need two points to make a comparison, so we've got to talk about martial characters for a moment. Martial characters have some defining features throughout:
So if martials win fights... what is the point of spellcasters? On Spell effects Well, what is it spellcasters get? Various degrees of average-to-poor defenses, cantrips, and limited spell slots to cast things with. Let's pick four popular good spells to keep an eye on thoughout this analysis:
On Enemy Saving Throws Enemies have good saving throws. Saving throws vary a lot between different stats and enemies, but if you're forcing an enemy of equal level (which is likely stronger than the average!) with a perfectly average saving throw ("Moderate" save in Monster Building Guidelines) to save against your spells, they only have between a 35% and 45% chance to fail it, depending on your level (Odds increase at lv19+). Similarly, martial characters enjoy a 55 to 65% chance to hit with their attacks against the average tough foe ("High" AC in Monster Building Guidelines"). That is a... sizeable difference. How come? A big part of it is: Spells very rarely actually miss. Most do something even on a successful save, where an attack just completely whiffs - in the white room above, the spell has a 15-5% chance of doing nothing, where the attack has 45-35%. And those save effects are often no jokes either - Fireball still does 3d6 (which is comparable to a longbow fighter hitting), Slow still saps an action. Not big and impressive, but far better than nothing. It really adds up over time. So much so infact, that the aforementioned fireball - at level 5, where the gap huge at 40% fail chance vs. 75% hit chance - can very nearly match the damage of that longbow fighter in single target damage. The one thing that fighter is meant to be really good at. That's how strong 6d6 basic save is. Fireball is most certainly not meant to be a single target spell. Blasting is good, folks. On Versatility of Defenses That whiteroom math just now was probably inaccurate. It helps to give a rough frame of reference, but the world is not made out of High AC and Moderate Saves - it's made out of all kinds of statistics. Here comes another facet of the discussion: Martials can only use a few skill actions to target things other than AC. Almost all of their main prowess - Strikes - goes into specifically AC. Casters get to target three different saves and also still AC if they feel like it. It can go either way for any given defense, but if you know where to aim for, you get an immediate significant boon to your accuracy on basically any given creature. But how can you do that? Well, here's a bit of an asterisk: Recall Knowledge or guessing based on descriptions. One is unreliable based on how the table runs it (at least until it gets Remastered in november), one is unreliable based on intuition and curveballs. However, I believe most tables run RK in a way that lets you gather some clues here (and the rest should!) - the high mental stats of spellcasters often also give an advantage in using just that. That action can also be beneficial for martials deciding maneuvers, or can be just as beneficial if they take the action and share their findings. Use it! (And if you're a charisma caster instead, you're in turn uniquely able to lower those saves yourself via Demoralize and Bon Mot!) On Versatility of Effects But that's not all! Not only do different spells target different defenses, but they also do vastly different things. This right here is the true crux of spellcaster power, the rest is just setup. Remember Martials at the beginning: Specialized in hitting things. Really bloody good at hitting things. Solid at some other things if built for it. What can casters do? Basically anything. Fireball blows up groups of foes. Slow partially disables a single foe for a longer time and makes their life suck with some teamwork to waste more actions. Pirouette into Heal next round to retcon the enemy attempt to focus fire with no check, Air Walk after the fight to ignore a stupidly slippery cliff or gain blanket melee near-immunity! And that's just four spells. There are so many good effects among them that I couldn't possibly list them all. Yeah, your best tools run out fast and you just don't really have anything that matches the raw power of martial strikes - but depending on your spell list you can make damn near anything else. Walls, forced movement, an incredible array of utility magic that I don't have space to detail more in this post beyond saying it's really helpful, auto-hit magic missiles that outdamage melee fighters against bosses, twenty types of controls and debuffs, a rainbow of damage types for weaknesses, loads of buffs, spells with long durations that you can just cast before facing danger so you get free action buffs, naturally including many, many ways to make said martials much better at using that great raw power they have. Remember kids, if your +1 made the ranger hit, that's your damage! On Incapacitation Ah, the dreaded spell trait. Good spells, until a certain enemy level is hit, then they fall off a cliff. A rough solution of wanting "Spells should be awesome and be able to annihilate a foe with horrible conditions" and "Spells should not be able to wreck bosses" in the same game. Many are also single-target, meaning they would be the best in fights against single foes... but that's exactly where they're often useless! Why take something like this over something like Slow, that always works? Because Incapacitation spells have more powerful effects than those other spells. Doesn't work against the lone boss, no, but might well work against the boss who brought their friends to the party. The conditions these spells inflict are truly horrible and can set foes back so badly. Blindness often more than halves a foe's effectiveness. Impending Doom may be delayed, but comes with -4 AC one round in. Calm Emotions is way up there, taking enemies out the fight like we're playing D&D 5e. Baleful Polymorph actually just a stunlock, Color Spray pretends a Blind and minute-long Dazzle in a cone pretends it's anywhere near putting Frightened 2 on one guy... and remember, if you use top-level slots (as you should), that level limit is not half bad. You can hit APL+0 and on uneven levels even APL+1 foes - you can debilitate foes utterly when they're still just as strong as your entire character combined, or perhaps stronger. In one go. No crits needed. Try them sometime. On Spell Attacks So if casters can do anything, what if they pretended to be a Martial? Similarly to how save spells are less accurate, spell attacks are infamous for lacking half damage on miss while still having the reduced accuracy of a spellcaster. They don't even get potency runes! What gives? Short answer, three things:
Here's a graph for one such situation, comparing a few different attacks to a Flurry Longbow Ranger taking (only?) three shots. Target is an equal-level foe with High AC. https://preview.redd.it/rt4sf5uljv3b1.png?width=678&format=png&auto=webp&s=2bd40648e744b3b7f1ad7bc9fe0c11d24edc7084 The numbers are in direct comparison to the Ranger's damage output - so f.e. the basic Hydraulic Push at level 5 does about -20% average damage compared to the ranger, while the true strike'd version is at +20%. Crits and accuracy are accounted for, so are all the various stat and rune increases (including two elemental damage runes for the ranger at 9 and 15!). However, the ranger arguably doesn't need three actions to pull their shots off, unlike True Striked spells - and all spells here are cast at their maximum available level, so they're more expensive than you might want. Curiously, some of the spell attacks do much better in comparison against those hard-to-hit higher level foes - True Strike scales better than MAP attacks, it turns out. Is this situationalness worth it, when an AoE spell can dish out much higher raw numbers? How many Rangers do you need in your magic beam for it to be worth it? Ultimately, that's up for you to decide. If you don't like the prospects, you have many other great options after the first levels - but they're probably no good match for when you need to hit that one guy over there really bloody hard, right now. (Oh, and a Psychic taking True Strike on an Amp blows past all but one of these curves!) Wait, you keep comparing to bows. What about melee? Well, if spells are largely ranged, it makes sense to compare them to other ranged options, right? If you don't agree, things turn out similarly if we replace things with melee martials, except those martials have less actions to spend on attacking, are in more risky positions, and hit significantly harder with the actions they do have. On Low Levels All of these things cost spell slots - something that low level casters severely lack. The gap between level 1 and 2 spells is often huge, and where high level casters struggle to earnestly run out of spell slots, low level casters can burn out in just a few combats - early on, even a few turns! Turns out, cantrips are actually really bloody potent at those. A telekinetic projectile doing 1d6 plus 4 damage isn't impressive, but when the ranged martials don't even get to have damage modifiers, the melee folks have to melee at a level where one lucky crit can be all it takes, and where the martials have no runes yet for superior accuracy... there's suprisingly good utility to that. Especially if you - you guessed it - picked electric arc. Not all cantrips are created equal, and... well, it is what it is, and that is not very well balanced. Healing spells are super good here and Magic Weapon is probably more than a little bit overpowered, and every tradition can access two out of three between these, so casters are definetely able to give impressive contributions even here. Conclusion Despite the accuracy and limitations, between all of these explanations, there is one core truth to why spellcasting is good: Having just the right spell, at just the right time, is the single most powerful thing you can possibly do in this game. A fireball doing more raw damage than the fighter will do this entire fight. A Heal coming just in time to save a life, or just a turn of unconciousness, or frying an undead horde. A Slow keeping a boss in perpetual lockdown because they got somewhat unlucky once. An Air Walk that the enemies just... can't respond to. (This is also why the Flexible Spellcaster archetype is actually pretty nifty - you're so much more likely to have just that right spell prepared somewhere.) Keep many tools around and keep your options open. The martials bring home most of the damage to progress those enemy health bars to zero... but when they miss and the enemy crits, when the terrain is screwy, when the dragon has wings and just keeps burning everything down, that's when "I am REALLY good at attacking" shows a distinct lack of plan Bs. Martials do not win fights. Martials progress fights. This is a team game, and if you don't work together, the dragon wins. Casters are the ones that pull the strings in the back and make sure the fight actually progresses in your favor. And sometimes the boss Nat 1s against Slow. Then yeah, they definetely just win that fight. "Okay, I get that spellcasters are useful, but I don't feel useful. They're boring to play!" Okay, but... how much would you need to feel useful, when you're already being useful? As in, what should the game give you beyond making you actually be useful? Taste is highly subjective and you're of course not wrong for feeling like that. Nothing is for everyone. But is the problem here within the game, or within perspective? Perhaps the best fix here is shifting the perspective a little - how much did I achieve through my martials or protect them from? How would things have turned out if I wasn't there to make life hard for the foes? And to everyone else, thank your supports! You've got plenty reason to. "Okay, but I don't want versatility. I don't want a bag of tricks, I just want to be really good at blowing stuff up and not deal with all of this!" That I can entirely get behind. PF2e did a great job at making d20-style do-anything magic balanced and mechanically reasonable, but it indeed is built to discourage preparing only fireballs. Perhaps Psychic being more geared towards this kind of thing will help, or Kineticist can fill that niche as a magic-user who's built on a martial chassis, or maybe we'll even get an Elementalist rework in august that makes that useful. Until then, we can only hope. |
2023.06.03 23:49 Many_Ad_521 Who thinks mental health content is easier to access and less expensive than going to therapy?
submitted by Many_Ad_521 to AskReddit [link] [comments]
2023.06.03 23:48 Brandroided My best friend/roommate (25F) won’t leave her narcissistic and abusive “boyfriend” (30M). Should I continue to be a supportive friend/shoulder to cry on?
My best friend/roommate recently started seeing her “ex” again. I put the quotes because they have never actually been official, she’s never met anyone in his life or been to his house, but they “dated” for about a year. During this time I was indifferent to him. He wasn’t friendly or unfriendly and always peed all over the toilet seat and floor and left the seat up. She was so obsessed with him that we never talked anymore. They eventually broke it off and she was heartbroken. I felt bad but I was happy to see my friend become herself again.
Since they stopped seeing each other she has spent the last two years convinced that he is her future husband and that God told her they are meant to be. She thinks this man is perfect and excuses all of his bad behavior because he had a complicated childhood. They recently started to talk again over the last two months. At first I was just happy to see her happy again after being so sad without him.
Just take my word for it, this man is a narcissistic abuser. There are too many details to explain, but they fight constantly and as I am also living in the same house I hear the way he speaks to her. He has the “alpha male mentality” and thinks women are below men. They still aren’t official because “there is nothing she can do to benefit him”. She has to prove herself to him. So now she cooks him dinner every night, breakfast in the morning, helps promote his business. They fight because she “hasn’t given him what she can’t give anyone else” (He wants a 3some and she doesn’t). He gave her a two week deadline to get an IUD or he’d leave her so she got one for him. During the appointment he got mad at her for crying because she was nervous about the procedure and they spent the day arguing about that. She always ends up apologizing. He will find any way to ridicule her and she ALWAYS goes back to him!
I am very invested as she is my best friend since we were teens. I care about her so much and worry for her mental health. I feel her hurt and get mad on her behalf. She rarely talks to me anymore, and when she does it’s to vent about him and I see her in a very dark place mentally. Then when they’re fine again she ignores me, sometimes not even saying hi because they are on FaceTime ALL THE TIME. I am not taking it personally but I am worried about the amount of control he has on her. We live together and usually talk about everything!
I thought it was finally over last night. He got mad at her because he found out she slept with one person in the two years they were broken up. She lied and said she didn’t because she was afraid of his reaction. He spent the day calling her a whore anyways and somehow coerced her into sending him $3,000 to prove to him that she didn’t sleep with anyone and promised he’d send it back if she passed one “test”. He searched her phone and caught her in the lie and now refuses to send the money back. He said “it’s me or the money”. Somehow she’s still begging for him to stay with her. I can’t take it at this point. He sent her flowers today and she’s buying right into it.
I am too invested. I need advice on what to do. On one hand she is an adult and is choosing to be with him and it’s not my life. On the other hand I have to witness this all first hand and support her through every heartbreak, while she hasn’t been a great friend to me in return. I as well as everyone in her life is worried and has told her she needs to leave him many times. I know she has to do it on her own terms, but when is enough enough?
Do I continue to be there for her when she needs a shoulder to cry on even tho I feel used? Am I making this about me or is it valid for me to be annoyed with her at this point? Should I call her mom? (So serious, she’s worried too after this $3k bank transfer but she won’t tell her why). I don’t know what to do at this point but I’m very concerned.
submitted by Brandroided to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
Since they stopped seeing each other she has spent the last two years convinced that he is her future husband and that God told her they are meant to be. She thinks this man is perfect and excuses all of his bad behavior because he had a complicated childhood. They recently started to talk again over the last two months. At first I was just happy to see her happy again after being so sad without him.
Just take my word for it, this man is a narcissistic abuser. There are too many details to explain, but they fight constantly and as I am also living in the same house I hear the way he speaks to her. He has the “alpha male mentality” and thinks women are below men. They still aren’t official because “there is nothing she can do to benefit him”. She has to prove herself to him. So now she cooks him dinner every night, breakfast in the morning, helps promote his business. They fight because she “hasn’t given him what she can’t give anyone else” (He wants a 3some and she doesn’t). He gave her a two week deadline to get an IUD or he’d leave her so she got one for him. During the appointment he got mad at her for crying because she was nervous about the procedure and they spent the day arguing about that. She always ends up apologizing. He will find any way to ridicule her and she ALWAYS goes back to him!
I am very invested as she is my best friend since we were teens. I care about her so much and worry for her mental health. I feel her hurt and get mad on her behalf. She rarely talks to me anymore, and when she does it’s to vent about him and I see her in a very dark place mentally. Then when they’re fine again she ignores me, sometimes not even saying hi because they are on FaceTime ALL THE TIME. I am not taking it personally but I am worried about the amount of control he has on her. We live together and usually talk about everything!
I thought it was finally over last night. He got mad at her because he found out she slept with one person in the two years they were broken up. She lied and said she didn’t because she was afraid of his reaction. He spent the day calling her a whore anyways and somehow coerced her into sending him $3,000 to prove to him that she didn’t sleep with anyone and promised he’d send it back if she passed one “test”. He searched her phone and caught her in the lie and now refuses to send the money back. He said “it’s me or the money”. Somehow she’s still begging for him to stay with her. I can’t take it at this point. He sent her flowers today and she’s buying right into it.
I am too invested. I need advice on what to do. On one hand she is an adult and is choosing to be with him and it’s not my life. On the other hand I have to witness this all first hand and support her through every heartbreak, while she hasn’t been a great friend to me in return. I as well as everyone in her life is worried and has told her she needs to leave him many times. I know she has to do it on her own terms, but when is enough enough?
Do I continue to be there for her when she needs a shoulder to cry on even tho I feel used? Am I making this about me or is it valid for me to be annoyed with her at this point? Should I call her mom? (So serious, she’s worried too after this $3k bank transfer but she won’t tell her why). I don’t know what to do at this point but I’m very concerned.
2023.06.03 23:48 Winter_Thought8639 Got an offer
I was unemplyed for so long. People won't understand but I know this community will. Mostly mental health issues. I was so out of it. Could barely speak properly for years. There was a point where I seriously wondered how I'm going to be in the future. Maybe working as a janitor? I got rejected at McDonald's and old navy. I couldnt talk properly, lost my people skills. Even forgot how to make friends and talk to people. I managed to convince best buy im good for them. They gave an offer. Really happy. Idk how I got sales since I'm very awkward in talking with people. I used to be good at it but I lost that ability years ago.
I was losing all hope, especially after going 2nd round interview at McDonald's and getting rejected, as well as at old navy. I walked into so many stores(fast food, clothing) and nothing. I looked at people working at Walmart and thought I can do that man. But no luck there. They had so many applicants. And it's hard to get a job if you lost touch with people and have no internal reference, and I'm just awkward I come off as if I'm on drugs even if I'm not lol.
I applied to my last batch of jobs before I lost all hope. I was dreading having to start applying Again. To places like McDonald's(where I live McDonald's gets 100 applicants per day). I was about to walk into shopping malls and go to the janitors and tell them I can help.
Driving home I got a call. I see that it's best buy from where I interviewed. They don't give calls back if I got rejected. I thought, did I get hired? I missed the call. Listened to the voicemail. They said they want to offer me a position. I was really happy.
Thought I'd post here. Just to hear your thoughts. It's been years since I worked and even made friends and talked to people tbh. I'm still thinking, man what did they see in me? If only they knew my actual story as opposed to how I modified it on my resume to make it look like I had no breaks / gaps.
Good luck guys all I can say is make yourself available even if it's early morning. Try your hardest to come across as Not desperate and be friendly in interviews. You'll have to tweak your resume and bs a little to land an interview. Be confident. Goodluck!
submitted by Winter_Thought8639 to Unemployed [link] [comments]
I was losing all hope, especially after going 2nd round interview at McDonald's and getting rejected, as well as at old navy. I walked into so many stores(fast food, clothing) and nothing. I looked at people working at Walmart and thought I can do that man. But no luck there. They had so many applicants. And it's hard to get a job if you lost touch with people and have no internal reference, and I'm just awkward I come off as if I'm on drugs even if I'm not lol.
I applied to my last batch of jobs before I lost all hope. I was dreading having to start applying Again. To places like McDonald's(where I live McDonald's gets 100 applicants per day). I was about to walk into shopping malls and go to the janitors and tell them I can help.
Driving home I got a call. I see that it's best buy from where I interviewed. They don't give calls back if I got rejected. I thought, did I get hired? I missed the call. Listened to the voicemail. They said they want to offer me a position. I was really happy.
Thought I'd post here. Just to hear your thoughts. It's been years since I worked and even made friends and talked to people tbh. I'm still thinking, man what did they see in me? If only they knew my actual story as opposed to how I modified it on my resume to make it look like I had no breaks / gaps.
Good luck guys all I can say is make yourself available even if it's early morning. Try your hardest to come across as Not desperate and be friendly in interviews. You'll have to tweak your resume and bs a little to land an interview. Be confident. Goodluck!
2023.06.03 23:47 OneBoredMan02 Time to be a Hero Volume 24
Serious Issues - Time to be a Hero - Volume 24
Sunday 24th June 2017
WARNING: THIS VOLUME CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE!
It's been ten days since Natsuki got kidnapped and held hostage by the recently arrived agents from Coomer. We beat them and promptly moved base to this little cabin like structure just at the outskirts of town, it's run down in places but it's nothing we can't fix up! Since last week nobody has reported any sightings of any Coomer agents which is expected, but I know it's just part of how they work. They look for a trial and follow it, until they find you. But when they do, they don't attack, they hang back for awhile and watch, waiting for a moment to take you by surprise. Stalking you. Assessing your strengths and weaknesses. Waiting for an opportunity. When they do make their move, they are quick. They are precise. They are calculating. They do not make mistakes. They do not get cocky. They do not let up for a second. That's why we all need to be on high alert and wide eyed. Hell, normal patrol is more dangerous now than ever! We just need to get permission and recognition from everybody else if we want to patrol for the night! Thankfully we came up with a secret code for the group chat, just in case that anybody that hacks into our group chat will not recognise what we are talking about right away. Basically we use emojis to let the others know about certain things, it's a code and it confuses me at the best of times. But Sayori did put this together on a whim so we should be just that little bit safer now. Right now I'm sitting in my apartment watching tv as I wait for Monika to come back from visiting her parents. She asked me if I wanted to come along but I declined her offer, I just want to rest a little bit from working hard to make the base for us. I had Sayori on my back telling me the various things she wanted, it was like her telling Santa what she wanted for Christmas! It was a ridiculous amount of things I had to make and it really took the wind out of my sails! So here I am, just relaxing I guess... I look at the tv show I was watching, it's some random programme about a teacher making drugs or something? I don't know about it, it's kinda funny I suppose, yet I can't really sit down and just enjoy it. In the back of my mind, I'm worried sick about Monika! She's been away for an hour now and I feel like it's been far too long for her to be out and not at least send me a text or whatever! But I shouldn't think too much of this, I'm just stressed out of my mind and very tired. I rub my eyes as I try to return back to the programme, but I just can't. Now that I've acknowledged the worry I can't get it out of my head! Fuck it! I toss away the remote and grab my phone, I'll just give her a text. Ask her how she's getting on with her parents. I shoot Monika a text in our chat reading:
'hey honey! just checking up on u and ur parents, how is it all going??' I set down my phone and wait for a reply...
one minute passes...
She still hasn't seen my text! Argh! Botan, give her time to pull out the phone and have a look at her notifications! She's with her parents for goodness sake, she can't just focus on me all the time! I need to settle down more! Maybe if I do some chores? I stand up and look around the apartment? What could I do? Maybe give the carpet a vacuum? Yeah! I head over to the closet, pull out the vacuum and bring it over to the centre of the living room. I turn it on and start the routine of clearing up the floor. I move the couch and get under it as I make my way around the room. Reaching into little corners and below the tv stand as I make sure everything's clean! I smile as I turn the vacuum off and see that the carpet is now much cleaner! I smile as I put the vacuum back into the closet. I then head back over to the couch and pick up my phone, Monika still hasn't seen my message? I'm getting concerned now, it's been unread for seven minutes, maybe I should phone her?? I go to select the call option but I stop myself, I am just....overreacting. Give her time. Maybe she left her phone in another room? She's at her parents' house after all? Or maybe she still hasn't gotten a chance to? Right, well what now?
…
Guess some dinner wouldn't hurt? I walk into the kitchen and have a look around the fridge for something to eat? Hmmm, maybe Monika would like something for when she gets back? I grab my phone and give her another text. 'would u like something 4 dinner?' I put my phone back into my pocket as I have another look. Guess I'll have some pizza with some chips! I take out a bag of frozen chips and a pepperoni and cheese pizza, setting them both onto the kitchen counter. I grab a tray for both pizza and fries and set them both out. I head over to the cooker and pre-heat the oven as I give it a minute or so. I then put my chips in first, followed by the pizza and close the oven door. Time to let them cook! I head back over to the living room and sit down. Got to give them time to cook, so what now? I look at the time, it's just coming up to eight? Hmmm, Monika did say she'll be back at around eight so....where is she? Botan! Stop it! I slap myself in the face! I really need to get a grip of myself! Maybe I can destress with a nice bath? Yeah, that will help! I walk into the kitchen and set a timer on the electronic clock for my food to be taken out. I then head into the bathroom and start running the bath. After a few minutes the bath is filled up and has plenty of bubbles going as I take off my clothes, here we go! I step in as the warm water quickly makes me jump in surprise at the heat! I then quickly get in as I relax. Oh yeah, this is much better! I smile, it's almost like I wasn't panicking about my girlfriend potentially going missing when she's out right now! ….urgh! I cover my face in water and take a deep breath. I just need to calm down. That's all. Monika can handle herself. The worse thing that could happen is that she gets killed and I never see her again...rgh! That temper I have, I almost forgot! Jeez, no more thoughts like that! Jesus, why did I even think of that?? Am I really wanting to push myself to burst out there and go looking for her? She's fine! As soon as I think that I hear my phone vibrate in the pocket of my shorts! Oh! That's probably her! I reach over to my towel, drying my hands before grabbing my phone. I take look at the message I just got, it's from Yuri?
Y: 'Hi Botan, I know this may seem a little short notice but can you please come down to the shop? I require your assistance with something' …sigh, fuck off man! I shake my head and chuck my phone away! Fucking Yuri! Why does she have to ask me of all people?! Why not her fucking boy toy?! sigh...calm down man. I'm losing it. Having no Monika around is really bad for me. She's the only thing keeping me from floating away from reason. With Coomer now here too, I guess it's all starting to pile up somewhat? Sigh...right. I pick my phone back up and send Yuri a text.
B: 'kk Yuri, give me 5 mins' I sigh as I sit up, so much for this bath? I quickly get out and dry myself off with a towel. I then walk out of the bathroom after pulling the plug on the bath, my phone vibrates again? I check it, another message from Yuri.
Y: 'thank you very much, please bring your best suit too!' ...oh right! I quickly dry off my hair and get in costume before running to the window-wait! I check on the timer in the kitchen, there's still around fifteen minutes to go? I turn the heat down to the minimum and make the adjust on the time, I just to be sure I don't want to burn down my new home. Monika would kill me. I leap out of the window into the dying light of the day! Okay, to the store! I don't know what's going on with Yuri but she might need my help! Although her texts were quite casual there? No matter! I swing into the air and land on a roof as I see the shop in the distance! Right, be ready for anything! I jump across a gap and leap off of a roof to see Yuri in front of the store? She looks....glum? I land not too far away from her as she looks at me, she doesn't look happy that's for sure? "Thanks for coming Sparrow." She's using my hero name?
B: "Of course citizen? What do you need?" I walk up to her as she looks around herself?
Y: "Uhm, well... there's a person in the store who's...well..." Yuri looks into the store and shivers? "I don't think he's mentally well at all..."
B: "What do you mean?" I look into the store as I spot a man? He's throwing things about in a crazed like fashion?
Y: "I would deal with this myself but..." Yuri whispers as she eyes one of the numerous cameras in the store. "I can't really run off and just come back you know?"
B: "I understand, well what do you think is wrong with him?" She shrugs?
Y: "He came in normal at first, he smiled and even said hello. Next thing I knew he started screaming all of sudden?" We look at the man as he climbs on top of the counter? "I've never seen anything like this before?"
B: "Calm down Yuri, I'll take care of it...did you call for police and an ambulance? This might be a drug related issue."
Y: "I have Sparrow don't worry. All the doors are locked so it will only be you and him in there. Just try not to make too much of a mess please?"
B: "Got it." I walk into the store slowly as most of the lights are off? I look back at Yuri who only locks the front door behind me and gives me an encouraging smile. I think she's a little scared to be in this type of situation. After all...it is very dark, and I'm not too fond of this situation already. I grab a torch from my pouch and get moving, the store just frozen in silence it seems? Okay, come on Botan. You got this. You've dealt with much worse things than just a potential drugged up man. This should be a piece of cake...hopefully? "Hello??" I call out rather nervously, but the silence I get in return just makes my spine shudder. "I'm here to help, please make yourself known!"
…
?: "YAH!!" A sudden scream comes from my left as I see the man on all fours quickly moving about between the stalls?! What the hell has gotten into him?! I look around before getting the good idea of zipping myself up to the roof to get a birds eye view of the whole store. I do just that and shine my torch downwards, quickly spotting the man huddled over some flowers as he eats them?? Jeez, this man's not right at all! He looks at me with a crazed look before slowly turning. "Ah! baga to yos!" He stares at me as he talks gibberish. "Joka in plot bin!" I just feel sorry as he stares at me, he needs serious help. "Ah! Yoga bob!" He picks up a candle and throws it at me! I'm able to get out the way but it lands me back onto the store floor and out of sight of the man. I can hear him moving about as I try to keep quiet, I need to get the jump on him. I don't want to hurt him of course, this could be some sort of episode he's suffering from? I spawn in some sleeping gas as I look around for him, just going to put to him to sleep so that I can start to look him over. This must be some- "Yawh!" The man jumps on my back as I stagger for a second! He hits me or rather slaps me in the head a few times before I grab his arm and throw him off of me! I'm not too hard as I only pull him off and get in front of me as he tries to scramble to his feet, but sadly for him I'm too quick as I hook his head and apply the gas to his mouth and nose. The man struggles at first but starts to slow down as he eyes close and then he's out. I set him down into the recovery position as I look at him. Poor guy, what was the cause of this? I look at his face as...hold on? I know this guy? That's....Nick! The guy who I saved on my first night here! What's he doing back here?! Nick looks a little worse for ware, his beard is a lot longer as is his hair. He looks like a wild man if anything. His clothes are rather nice though? I get a closer look at him as he breaths gently. I told him not to come back! Or...did he choose to come back? Maybe he was found by some of the big mans' guys? I look at Nick for any sign of some drug use, he couldn't have a mental condition like that? Soon I find two needle marks in both his neck and right arm? Two marks? Hmm, why did he get injected twice? What is this stuff? I take a capsule and a blood sample for later. Sayori and Yuri can take a look at that. If the drug runs in the blood then that will be where our answers lie. The room then gets lit up in blues and reds as the police arrive first! I pick up Nick and carry him to the door as Yuri sees me coming. She unlocks the door as she looks at me.
Y: "Thank you Sparrow! What was wrong with him?"
B: "Drug." I say to her and she subtly nods. The police come over and start talking to Yuri as the ambulance arrives shortly after. I give them the run down of Nicks' actions as well as another sample of blood for them to test, the authorities could do with a heads up about what this drug actually is. Nick gets carted away as things get rapped up rather quickly as the ambulance goes off to take Nick to hospital and the police leave after they take our statements and have a general look around. Soon it's only me and Yuri again, she looks at me.
Y: "Thank you again with your help Botan, I just didn't really know what to do...that was so sudden."
B: "Don't mention it...here..." I hand her the sample as she looks at it.
Y: "Is that from the man?" She asks wearing a serious expression.
B: "Yeah, you and Sayori can look it over. You two are the brains after all..."
Y: "Very well then..." She pockets it as she looks at me again. "What's wrong? You look...rather sombre?"
B: "I knew that guy...Nick."
Y: "Were you friends or...?"
B: "Well, do you remember my first night in town?" Yuri thinks before she puts the pieces together.
Y: "Was that the man you helped?"
B: "It was. I told him to leave Yuri, and never come back. But..."
Y: "Did you think he was brought back here against his will?"
B: "He had two clear injection marks Yuri, one on his arm and another on his neck."
Y: "Hmmm...maybe he was jumped with that drug and let loose....like a guinea pig?"
B: "Maybe...or perhaps this was a message?"
Y: "What do you mean?"
B: "...the big man knows a lot Yuri, a whole lot more than we think he does." Yuri swallows as I sigh. "I need to get going, I have somewhere to be."
Y: "Oh okay, have a nice night! Thank you again!"
B: "Of course, see you later!" I swing away back home as I'm left feeling rather down. Poor Nick, I didn't wish to see him again but...to see him reduced to that? Is just sad... I arrive back home as I quickly head into the kitchen. I hope the food wasn't burnt! I check the food and see that it's...okay? It's fine I guess? I pull it out and look at it... you know what? I think that-
Knock! Knock!
There's two quick knocks at the door and then shortly a giggle?
M: "Guess who's back~" ….oh fuck! I throw the food into the bin quickly and spawn in some replacement food as Monika comes into the kitchen! "Hey honey, why are you in gear?"
B: "Oh? I was just helping Yuri is all!" She nods as she looks at the food.
M: "Awww, you really made some dinner for us~?" I just nod as I take off my mask.
B: "I guess..." Monika smiles as she sniffs the air?
M: "hmm? Funny?" She then checks the bin... "....ohoho! Did it not go right the first time?"
B: "Uhhhh...no comment?"
M: "ehehe! It's fine Botan! Don't worry about it!" She sits down as she rubs her head. "aww, what a day. What did Yuri want with you?" Monika looks a little....jealous? Is it? I can't really tell. "I'm not jealous Botan." ...oh...
B: "Sorry! I just...it's been a pretty rough night." I sit beside her as she rubs my back.
M: "How'd you mean? You look pretty upset?"
B: "I just...I went to the shop because a man was...well for a lack for a better word, crazy." Monika nods for me to continue. "Yuri didn't want to run off to get changed so she called upon me."
M: "Why you?" Monika asks rather sternly?
B: "I don't know? Maybe she thought I was best suited to deal with this? I went in there and well..."
M: "Well?"
B: "It's...it was the guy who I helped on my first night. He was drugged Monika. Probably dragged back here in this mess, taken away from the chance I gave him! I just...don't think that's fair at all..." Monika nods slowly.
M: "Well...was he okay or...?"
B: "He was crazy. Acting like a wild man. A primate. He was eating flowers Monika!" Monika sighs.
M: "Poor guy...what was his name?"
B: "Nick."
M: "Sigh...well? Did you get a sample of his blood or something else?"
B: "I did, it's just...I thought I really helped him Monika. I thought I gave him a way out but...it wasn't enough..." Monika rests her head against my shoulder.
M: "You tried Botan. You tried, and that's good enough for me."
B: "It's not good enough for me though. Nick deserved a life! He didn't deserve that! To be someone's guinea pig!"
M: "Just relax darling...just...it's okay..." I sigh as Monika smiles sadly. "Hey? How about we go lie down and eat this food okay? Let's just snuggle together while eating pizza huh?" She smiles as I nod.
B: "Okay..."
M: "Good boy..." She helps me up and takes the pizza as we go through to the other room to rest.
- Yuri's perspective -
Look at this mess! Was it too much for me to ask Botan to at least help me tidy this up? Sigh...I'm going to be here forever! As I'm sweeping the floor the lights suddenly come back on?
Y: "Huh?" I look at the lights as someone enters the store? "Hello?" …
A: "Boo!" I jump as I see Alex behind me?!
Y: "What?!"
S: "ehehe!" I see Sayori also come skipping in as I relax.
Y: "oh, guys don't do that!"
A: "Sorry Yuri! It was too good to let this pass! What's going on by the way? Why was the place dark, and why is it a mess?"
S: "Are you okay Yuri?"
Y: "I'm fine, it's just...well a man came in with some sort of drug in him." I show Sayori the sample Botan gave me.
S: "Huh? Is this his blood?"
Y: "Yes." Sayori takes it and has a look.
S: "hmmm, if it's a drug I'll find out what drug it is!"
Y: "Thank you."
A: "Did you hurt yourself at all?"
Y: "No I'm fine! I just got Botan to help me is all!"
A: "...I see?"
Y: "I didn't want to disturb your night out guys, after all...I know you two really want to build bridges again after that whole duplicate incident."
S: "Yeah, we're getting better. Slowly but getting there!"
A: "Yeah! Just a few more nights out and we're golden!"
Y: "Just don't try anything together..."
S: "ohoho! I wouldn't worry about it Yuri! I'm not about to steal your man away from you~"
Y: "What?! No! We're just friends!"
A: "Sayori, really??"
S: "Man you two are just hopeless...ah well! You want our help Yuri?"
A: "Yeah! We can help tidy up!"
Y: "That would be grand, thank you!" Alex heads off as does Sayori as I continue sweeping. The three of us focus on cleaning up for awhile as the shop looks a little better! A few minutes have passed and we've managed to pick up most of the destroyed products as well as mop up the floor. Sayori is busy re-arranging the flower display as I finish up collecting the rest of the ruined flowers. I smile as I dump the rest of them into the bin and turn around to see Alex moving a few boxes. I glance over to Sayori, she seems to have this faraway look in her eye? She seems sad? uuu, I want to say something to her but I don't want to say the wrong thing! I walk up to Alex as he looks at me.
A: "Hey Yuri, what's up?"
Y: "Um, it might be just me but.... have you noticed Sayori has been quiet for the past ten minutes or so?" We glance at her as she's smiling while looking at a few flowers.
A: "Well... yeah. I didn't want to say this in front of her but, tonight was one of her quiet nights." I look at him as Alex looks generally worried. "She was... you know?" I nod.
Y: "I see... her rainclouds must of came in again..."
A: "Yeah... I didn't want to provoke her in some way so I just let her be."
Y: "That's probably the right move, she might just be having one of her down days..." We look on in silence as Sayori suddenly turns around and smiles at us.
S: "Okay! I'm done here, what about you guys? Is there anything else to do??"
A: "Uh...Yuri?" I look around... everything seems to be in order? If not, I'll just sort it out for tomorrow.
Y: "It's fine! I think we've done everything we could! Thank you for your help guys~"
A: "Of course!"
S: "You're welcome!" Sayori smiles as she skips to the front door. "I'm going to go ahead a little early if that's okay, I'm rather tired..."
A: "Are you sure? We should go together, that way Coomer can't pick you off Sayori."
S: "It's okay! I'll get the bus! Thanks for your concern~"
A: "...right."
Y: "Well if you're sure, then goodnight Sayori~"
S: "Goodnight guys!" Sayori leaves and skips down the street.
A: "Well... we should think about leaving too."
Y: "Yeah... let me get my bag."
A: "Sure!" I head into the office to grab my things, only to notice the face in the corner of my eye! I turn to see nothing...uh? I could've sworn there was a face peaking into the shop? It might just be me, I've been very paranoid lately... Well, I'm sure it was nothing to worry about...
S: "sigh... so they both noticed me... I'm so fucking worthless..."
submitted by OneBoredMan02 to DDLC [link] [comments]
Sunday 24th June 2017
WARNING: THIS VOLUME CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE!
It's been ten days since Natsuki got kidnapped and held hostage by the recently arrived agents from Coomer. We beat them and promptly moved base to this little cabin like structure just at the outskirts of town, it's run down in places but it's nothing we can't fix up! Since last week nobody has reported any sightings of any Coomer agents which is expected, but I know it's just part of how they work. They look for a trial and follow it, until they find you. But when they do, they don't attack, they hang back for awhile and watch, waiting for a moment to take you by surprise. Stalking you. Assessing your strengths and weaknesses. Waiting for an opportunity. When they do make their move, they are quick. They are precise. They are calculating. They do not make mistakes. They do not get cocky. They do not let up for a second. That's why we all need to be on high alert and wide eyed. Hell, normal patrol is more dangerous now than ever! We just need to get permission and recognition from everybody else if we want to patrol for the night! Thankfully we came up with a secret code for the group chat, just in case that anybody that hacks into our group chat will not recognise what we are talking about right away. Basically we use emojis to let the others know about certain things, it's a code and it confuses me at the best of times. But Sayori did put this together on a whim so we should be just that little bit safer now. Right now I'm sitting in my apartment watching tv as I wait for Monika to come back from visiting her parents. She asked me if I wanted to come along but I declined her offer, I just want to rest a little bit from working hard to make the base for us. I had Sayori on my back telling me the various things she wanted, it was like her telling Santa what she wanted for Christmas! It was a ridiculous amount of things I had to make and it really took the wind out of my sails! So here I am, just relaxing I guess... I look at the tv show I was watching, it's some random programme about a teacher making drugs or something? I don't know about it, it's kinda funny I suppose, yet I can't really sit down and just enjoy it. In the back of my mind, I'm worried sick about Monika! She's been away for an hour now and I feel like it's been far too long for her to be out and not at least send me a text or whatever! But I shouldn't think too much of this, I'm just stressed out of my mind and very tired. I rub my eyes as I try to return back to the programme, but I just can't. Now that I've acknowledged the worry I can't get it out of my head! Fuck it! I toss away the remote and grab my phone, I'll just give her a text. Ask her how she's getting on with her parents. I shoot Monika a text in our chat reading:
'hey honey! just checking up on u and ur parents, how is it all going??' I set down my phone and wait for a reply...
one minute passes...
She still hasn't seen my text! Argh! Botan, give her time to pull out the phone and have a look at her notifications! She's with her parents for goodness sake, she can't just focus on me all the time! I need to settle down more! Maybe if I do some chores? I stand up and look around the apartment? What could I do? Maybe give the carpet a vacuum? Yeah! I head over to the closet, pull out the vacuum and bring it over to the centre of the living room. I turn it on and start the routine of clearing up the floor. I move the couch and get under it as I make my way around the room. Reaching into little corners and below the tv stand as I make sure everything's clean! I smile as I turn the vacuum off and see that the carpet is now much cleaner! I smile as I put the vacuum back into the closet. I then head back over to the couch and pick up my phone, Monika still hasn't seen my message? I'm getting concerned now, it's been unread for seven minutes, maybe I should phone her?? I go to select the call option but I stop myself, I am just....overreacting. Give her time. Maybe she left her phone in another room? She's at her parents' house after all? Or maybe she still hasn't gotten a chance to? Right, well what now?
…
Guess some dinner wouldn't hurt? I walk into the kitchen and have a look around the fridge for something to eat? Hmmm, maybe Monika would like something for when she gets back? I grab my phone and give her another text. 'would u like something 4 dinner?' I put my phone back into my pocket as I have another look. Guess I'll have some pizza with some chips! I take out a bag of frozen chips and a pepperoni and cheese pizza, setting them both onto the kitchen counter. I grab a tray for both pizza and fries and set them both out. I head over to the cooker and pre-heat the oven as I give it a minute or so. I then put my chips in first, followed by the pizza and close the oven door. Time to let them cook! I head back over to the living room and sit down. Got to give them time to cook, so what now? I look at the time, it's just coming up to eight? Hmmm, Monika did say she'll be back at around eight so....where is she? Botan! Stop it! I slap myself in the face! I really need to get a grip of myself! Maybe I can destress with a nice bath? Yeah, that will help! I walk into the kitchen and set a timer on the electronic clock for my food to be taken out. I then head into the bathroom and start running the bath. After a few minutes the bath is filled up and has plenty of bubbles going as I take off my clothes, here we go! I step in as the warm water quickly makes me jump in surprise at the heat! I then quickly get in as I relax. Oh yeah, this is much better! I smile, it's almost like I wasn't panicking about my girlfriend potentially going missing when she's out right now! ….urgh! I cover my face in water and take a deep breath. I just need to calm down. That's all. Monika can handle herself. The worse thing that could happen is that she gets killed and I never see her again...rgh! That temper I have, I almost forgot! Jeez, no more thoughts like that! Jesus, why did I even think of that?? Am I really wanting to push myself to burst out there and go looking for her? She's fine! As soon as I think that I hear my phone vibrate in the pocket of my shorts! Oh! That's probably her! I reach over to my towel, drying my hands before grabbing my phone. I take look at the message I just got, it's from Yuri?
Y: 'Hi Botan, I know this may seem a little short notice but can you please come down to the shop? I require your assistance with something' …sigh, fuck off man! I shake my head and chuck my phone away! Fucking Yuri! Why does she have to ask me of all people?! Why not her fucking boy toy?! sigh...calm down man. I'm losing it. Having no Monika around is really bad for me. She's the only thing keeping me from floating away from reason. With Coomer now here too, I guess it's all starting to pile up somewhat? Sigh...right. I pick my phone back up and send Yuri a text.
B: 'kk Yuri, give me 5 mins' I sigh as I sit up, so much for this bath? I quickly get out and dry myself off with a towel. I then walk out of the bathroom after pulling the plug on the bath, my phone vibrates again? I check it, another message from Yuri.
Y: 'thank you very much, please bring your best suit too!' ...oh right! I quickly dry off my hair and get in costume before running to the window-wait! I check on the timer in the kitchen, there's still around fifteen minutes to go? I turn the heat down to the minimum and make the adjust on the time, I just to be sure I don't want to burn down my new home. Monika would kill me. I leap out of the window into the dying light of the day! Okay, to the store! I don't know what's going on with Yuri but she might need my help! Although her texts were quite casual there? No matter! I swing into the air and land on a roof as I see the shop in the distance! Right, be ready for anything! I jump across a gap and leap off of a roof to see Yuri in front of the store? She looks....glum? I land not too far away from her as she looks at me, she doesn't look happy that's for sure? "Thanks for coming Sparrow." She's using my hero name?
B: "Of course citizen? What do you need?" I walk up to her as she looks around herself?
Y: "Uhm, well... there's a person in the store who's...well..." Yuri looks into the store and shivers? "I don't think he's mentally well at all..."
B: "What do you mean?" I look into the store as I spot a man? He's throwing things about in a crazed like fashion?
Y: "I would deal with this myself but..." Yuri whispers as she eyes one of the numerous cameras in the store. "I can't really run off and just come back you know?"
B: "I understand, well what do you think is wrong with him?" She shrugs?
Y: "He came in normal at first, he smiled and even said hello. Next thing I knew he started screaming all of sudden?" We look at the man as he climbs on top of the counter? "I've never seen anything like this before?"
B: "Calm down Yuri, I'll take care of it...did you call for police and an ambulance? This might be a drug related issue."
Y: "I have Sparrow don't worry. All the doors are locked so it will only be you and him in there. Just try not to make too much of a mess please?"
B: "Got it." I walk into the store slowly as most of the lights are off? I look back at Yuri who only locks the front door behind me and gives me an encouraging smile. I think she's a little scared to be in this type of situation. After all...it is very dark, and I'm not too fond of this situation already. I grab a torch from my pouch and get moving, the store just frozen in silence it seems? Okay, come on Botan. You got this. You've dealt with much worse things than just a potential drugged up man. This should be a piece of cake...hopefully? "Hello??" I call out rather nervously, but the silence I get in return just makes my spine shudder. "I'm here to help, please make yourself known!"
…
?: "YAH!!" A sudden scream comes from my left as I see the man on all fours quickly moving about between the stalls?! What the hell has gotten into him?! I look around before getting the good idea of zipping myself up to the roof to get a birds eye view of the whole store. I do just that and shine my torch downwards, quickly spotting the man huddled over some flowers as he eats them?? Jeez, this man's not right at all! He looks at me with a crazed look before slowly turning. "Ah! baga to yos!" He stares at me as he talks gibberish. "Joka in plot bin!" I just feel sorry as he stares at me, he needs serious help. "Ah! Yoga bob!" He picks up a candle and throws it at me! I'm able to get out the way but it lands me back onto the store floor and out of sight of the man. I can hear him moving about as I try to keep quiet, I need to get the jump on him. I don't want to hurt him of course, this could be some sort of episode he's suffering from? I spawn in some sleeping gas as I look around for him, just going to put to him to sleep so that I can start to look him over. This must be some- "Yawh!" The man jumps on my back as I stagger for a second! He hits me or rather slaps me in the head a few times before I grab his arm and throw him off of me! I'm not too hard as I only pull him off and get in front of me as he tries to scramble to his feet, but sadly for him I'm too quick as I hook his head and apply the gas to his mouth and nose. The man struggles at first but starts to slow down as he eyes close and then he's out. I set him down into the recovery position as I look at him. Poor guy, what was the cause of this? I look at his face as...hold on? I know this guy? That's....Nick! The guy who I saved on my first night here! What's he doing back here?! Nick looks a little worse for ware, his beard is a lot longer as is his hair. He looks like a wild man if anything. His clothes are rather nice though? I get a closer look at him as he breaths gently. I told him not to come back! Or...did he choose to come back? Maybe he was found by some of the big mans' guys? I look at Nick for any sign of some drug use, he couldn't have a mental condition like that? Soon I find two needle marks in both his neck and right arm? Two marks? Hmm, why did he get injected twice? What is this stuff? I take a capsule and a blood sample for later. Sayori and Yuri can take a look at that. If the drug runs in the blood then that will be where our answers lie. The room then gets lit up in blues and reds as the police arrive first! I pick up Nick and carry him to the door as Yuri sees me coming. She unlocks the door as she looks at me.
Y: "Thank you Sparrow! What was wrong with him?"
B: "Drug." I say to her and she subtly nods. The police come over and start talking to Yuri as the ambulance arrives shortly after. I give them the run down of Nicks' actions as well as another sample of blood for them to test, the authorities could do with a heads up about what this drug actually is. Nick gets carted away as things get rapped up rather quickly as the ambulance goes off to take Nick to hospital and the police leave after they take our statements and have a general look around. Soon it's only me and Yuri again, she looks at me.
Y: "Thank you again with your help Botan, I just didn't really know what to do...that was so sudden."
B: "Don't mention it...here..." I hand her the sample as she looks at it.
Y: "Is that from the man?" She asks wearing a serious expression.
B: "Yeah, you and Sayori can look it over. You two are the brains after all..."
Y: "Very well then..." She pockets it as she looks at me again. "What's wrong? You look...rather sombre?"
B: "I knew that guy...Nick."
Y: "Were you friends or...?"
B: "Well, do you remember my first night in town?" Yuri thinks before she puts the pieces together.
Y: "Was that the man you helped?"
B: "It was. I told him to leave Yuri, and never come back. But..."
Y: "Did you think he was brought back here against his will?"
B: "He had two clear injection marks Yuri, one on his arm and another on his neck."
Y: "Hmmm...maybe he was jumped with that drug and let loose....like a guinea pig?"
B: "Maybe...or perhaps this was a message?"
Y: "What do you mean?"
B: "...the big man knows a lot Yuri, a whole lot more than we think he does." Yuri swallows as I sigh. "I need to get going, I have somewhere to be."
Y: "Oh okay, have a nice night! Thank you again!"
B: "Of course, see you later!" I swing away back home as I'm left feeling rather down. Poor Nick, I didn't wish to see him again but...to see him reduced to that? Is just sad... I arrive back home as I quickly head into the kitchen. I hope the food wasn't burnt! I check the food and see that it's...okay? It's fine I guess? I pull it out and look at it... you know what? I think that-
Knock! Knock!
There's two quick knocks at the door and then shortly a giggle?
M: "Guess who's back~" ….oh fuck! I throw the food into the bin quickly and spawn in some replacement food as Monika comes into the kitchen! "Hey honey, why are you in gear?"
B: "Oh? I was just helping Yuri is all!" She nods as she looks at the food.
M: "Awww, you really made some dinner for us~?" I just nod as I take off my mask.
B: "I guess..." Monika smiles as she sniffs the air?
M: "hmm? Funny?" She then checks the bin... "....ohoho! Did it not go right the first time?"
B: "Uhhhh...no comment?"
M: "ehehe! It's fine Botan! Don't worry about it!" She sits down as she rubs her head. "aww, what a day. What did Yuri want with you?" Monika looks a little....jealous? Is it? I can't really tell. "I'm not jealous Botan." ...oh...
B: "Sorry! I just...it's been a pretty rough night." I sit beside her as she rubs my back.
M: "How'd you mean? You look pretty upset?"
B: "I just...I went to the shop because a man was...well for a lack for a better word, crazy." Monika nods for me to continue. "Yuri didn't want to run off to get changed so she called upon me."
M: "Why you?" Monika asks rather sternly?
B: "I don't know? Maybe she thought I was best suited to deal with this? I went in there and well..."
M: "Well?"
B: "It's...it was the guy who I helped on my first night. He was drugged Monika. Probably dragged back here in this mess, taken away from the chance I gave him! I just...don't think that's fair at all..." Monika nods slowly.
M: "Well...was he okay or...?"
B: "He was crazy. Acting like a wild man. A primate. He was eating flowers Monika!" Monika sighs.
M: "Poor guy...what was his name?"
B: "Nick."
M: "Sigh...well? Did you get a sample of his blood or something else?"
B: "I did, it's just...I thought I really helped him Monika. I thought I gave him a way out but...it wasn't enough..." Monika rests her head against my shoulder.
M: "You tried Botan. You tried, and that's good enough for me."
B: "It's not good enough for me though. Nick deserved a life! He didn't deserve that! To be someone's guinea pig!"
M: "Just relax darling...just...it's okay..." I sigh as Monika smiles sadly. "Hey? How about we go lie down and eat this food okay? Let's just snuggle together while eating pizza huh?" She smiles as I nod.
B: "Okay..."
M: "Good boy..." She helps me up and takes the pizza as we go through to the other room to rest.
- Yuri's perspective -
Look at this mess! Was it too much for me to ask Botan to at least help me tidy this up? Sigh...I'm going to be here forever! As I'm sweeping the floor the lights suddenly come back on?
Y: "Huh?" I look at the lights as someone enters the store? "Hello?" …
A: "Boo!" I jump as I see Alex behind me?!
Y: "What?!"
S: "ehehe!" I see Sayori also come skipping in as I relax.
Y: "oh, guys don't do that!"
A: "Sorry Yuri! It was too good to let this pass! What's going on by the way? Why was the place dark, and why is it a mess?"
S: "Are you okay Yuri?"
Y: "I'm fine, it's just...well a man came in with some sort of drug in him." I show Sayori the sample Botan gave me.
S: "Huh? Is this his blood?"
Y: "Yes." Sayori takes it and has a look.
S: "hmmm, if it's a drug I'll find out what drug it is!"
Y: "Thank you."
A: "Did you hurt yourself at all?"
Y: "No I'm fine! I just got Botan to help me is all!"
A: "...I see?"
Y: "I didn't want to disturb your night out guys, after all...I know you two really want to build bridges again after that whole duplicate incident."
S: "Yeah, we're getting better. Slowly but getting there!"
A: "Yeah! Just a few more nights out and we're golden!"
Y: "Just don't try anything together..."
S: "ohoho! I wouldn't worry about it Yuri! I'm not about to steal your man away from you~"
Y: "What?! No! We're just friends!"
A: "Sayori, really??"
S: "Man you two are just hopeless...ah well! You want our help Yuri?"
A: "Yeah! We can help tidy up!"
Y: "That would be grand, thank you!" Alex heads off as does Sayori as I continue sweeping. The three of us focus on cleaning up for awhile as the shop looks a little better! A few minutes have passed and we've managed to pick up most of the destroyed products as well as mop up the floor. Sayori is busy re-arranging the flower display as I finish up collecting the rest of the ruined flowers. I smile as I dump the rest of them into the bin and turn around to see Alex moving a few boxes. I glance over to Sayori, she seems to have this faraway look in her eye? She seems sad? uuu, I want to say something to her but I don't want to say the wrong thing! I walk up to Alex as he looks at me.
A: "Hey Yuri, what's up?"
Y: "Um, it might be just me but.... have you noticed Sayori has been quiet for the past ten minutes or so?" We glance at her as she's smiling while looking at a few flowers.
A: "Well... yeah. I didn't want to say this in front of her but, tonight was one of her quiet nights." I look at him as Alex looks generally worried. "She was... you know?" I nod.
Y: "I see... her rainclouds must of came in again..."
A: "Yeah... I didn't want to provoke her in some way so I just let her be."
Y: "That's probably the right move, she might just be having one of her down days..." We look on in silence as Sayori suddenly turns around and smiles at us.
S: "Okay! I'm done here, what about you guys? Is there anything else to do??"
A: "Uh...Yuri?" I look around... everything seems to be in order? If not, I'll just sort it out for tomorrow.
Y: "It's fine! I think we've done everything we could! Thank you for your help guys~"
A: "Of course!"
S: "You're welcome!" Sayori smiles as she skips to the front door. "I'm going to go ahead a little early if that's okay, I'm rather tired..."
A: "Are you sure? We should go together, that way Coomer can't pick you off Sayori."
S: "It's okay! I'll get the bus! Thanks for your concern~"
A: "...right."
Y: "Well if you're sure, then goodnight Sayori~"
S: "Goodnight guys!" Sayori leaves and skips down the street.
A: "Well... we should think about leaving too."
Y: "Yeah... let me get my bag."
A: "Sure!" I head into the office to grab my things, only to notice the face in the corner of my eye! I turn to see nothing...uh? I could've sworn there was a face peaking into the shop? It might just be me, I've been very paranoid lately... Well, I'm sure it was nothing to worry about...
S: "sigh... so they both noticed me... I'm so fucking worthless..."
2023.06.03 23:46 Wise_Suggestion_1225 Meet Chunks & Ivy!
 | Hey fellow pittie lovers 🤩 Just wanted to share our two pride and joys, Chunks (brindle) and Ivy (white). submitted by Wise_Suggestion_1225 to pitbulls [link] [comments] Both our girls are shelter rescues! Chunks is our first pittie, and we fell in love so much that we rescued Ivy a couple years later. Ivy was in rough shape when we got her. Approximately 1 y/o, prematurely bred, and used for dog fighting. We believe she may have sustained a TBI or was born with a neuro condition as she exhibits behaviors similar to autism in humans (we work in mental health). She’s such a special girl, who absolutely loves life and doesn’t have a mean bone in her body! These two are emotional support snuggle bugs and have truly changed our lives. We will never adopt anything but pitties for the rest of our days! ♥️ |
2023.06.03 23:45 bleak-0utlook Mental health journey as a woman
I don't really know where to start... I've been in this subreddit a while but I've never posted before. For context I'm a 26 year old female in FL and I suppose the purpose of this post is to rant, but I'm also open to any advice.
I have a mental health history, mostly as a younger child dealing with depression, anxiety, abuse and all that comes with that, self harm, etc. There was a while where the issues were tolerable and I didn't feel the need to address and treat them. There's also been times I've self medicated in attempt to numb from the issues. And then we have where I'm at now, which is having panic attacks and crippling anxiety. It's hard to function in every way, sleeping, eating, working, etc.
I'm trying to get help; I went to one ER-terrible idea, I know- but I was desperate and didn't know what to do. I also had very little money and no insurance. I talked to a psychiatrist on a video call and she said she would be prescribing me 2 things, one for anxiety and an anti-depressant. I waited for hours and finally I felt a bit of hope. When it came time to get my discharge papers, the medication we discussed wasn't what they prescribed me. The ER doctor prescribed me something different for anxiety, which was actually a medication I had taken before and never really helped me.
No big deal right? I bring up the discrepancy and apparently the ER was unable to write a script for what the other doctor suggested, and too bad just take what they give me. I ended up leaving very upset. They gave me a name of someone to follow up with. So I try to call the number for them, and it isn't a working number anymore. So I Google that person, and literally like 4 entries showed in my area. I called every number I found and it either didn't work, or the people had no idea who I was looking for. So that resource was nothing. ($800 bill for that btw, just came in the mail)
So out of desperation I went to yet another hospital ER. What other option did I have? None. Long story short, the people at the hospital couldn't/wouldn't help me. I explained everything to them, and let them know I just really needed help because the panic attacks are so debilitating. They said since another doctor prescribed me something they will give me nothing, and I left. They gave me resources to call as well. The first place, which is for low income people, I do not qualify for because my income is too high. (Imagine that, I'm right between being poor enough for help but not stable enough to afford insurance/not need help. Sigh).
There were a few other places I called, several of them were booked out for 2 or 3 months. A couple were just in no way affordable as I needed pretty urgent help. There was one place left. The reviews are all really bad on Google, but I guess I have nothing to lose. They told me it was open 24/7, which of course turned out not to be true. So I was supposed to go Friday but at this point I have to wait until Monday to even call, and cross my little fingers that I can even been seen on such short notice (and that I can afford it, too).
If that doesn't work I don't know what I will do. These hospitals aren't helping, I can't afford anything else, and the resources they give are so outdated the numbers don't even work on half. It's f**king infuriating. I'm desperate for help and all I want is to be able to get up and go to work without dealing with this panic. I went to a pharmacy today to fill the 2 prescriptions I originally got, and I was told I'd have to wait until Monday on one of them because the paper was a bit ripped. And the pharmacist wouldn't call the doctor to confirm until Monday (whatever, the phones work on weekends).
Not only is everything so unaffordable, this entire time every person I've talked to has been so rude and acts like they don't listen to a word I say. I've been as positive as I can through this ordeal and all the mental breakdowns that have come with it, but I'm so frustrated rn and losing all hope. I've lost so much weight because of all this stress, I can't keep going on this way physically OR mentally.
Maybe things will work out when I call the other office Monday, but I really don't know. It seems like every step of the way are a thousand obstacles. But I'm trying to hang in here the best I can.
If anyone has any advice, I'll gladly listen. I'm open to anything, including "alternative healing" or whatever you call it. I have a few crystals, books about ayurveda and similar topics, and two tarot decks. Admittedly, I have not been leaning into my spiritual side for this issue. Typing that out sounds dumb, why wouldn't I? But I guess it's just been hard on me all around.
submitted by bleak-0utlook to WitchesVsPatriarchy [link] [comments]
I have a mental health history, mostly as a younger child dealing with depression, anxiety, abuse and all that comes with that, self harm, etc. There was a while where the issues were tolerable and I didn't feel the need to address and treat them. There's also been times I've self medicated in attempt to numb from the issues. And then we have where I'm at now, which is having panic attacks and crippling anxiety. It's hard to function in every way, sleeping, eating, working, etc.
I'm trying to get help; I went to one ER-terrible idea, I know- but I was desperate and didn't know what to do. I also had very little money and no insurance. I talked to a psychiatrist on a video call and she said she would be prescribing me 2 things, one for anxiety and an anti-depressant. I waited for hours and finally I felt a bit of hope. When it came time to get my discharge papers, the medication we discussed wasn't what they prescribed me. The ER doctor prescribed me something different for anxiety, which was actually a medication I had taken before and never really helped me.
No big deal right? I bring up the discrepancy and apparently the ER was unable to write a script for what the other doctor suggested, and too bad just take what they give me. I ended up leaving very upset. They gave me a name of someone to follow up with. So I try to call the number for them, and it isn't a working number anymore. So I Google that person, and literally like 4 entries showed in my area. I called every number I found and it either didn't work, or the people had no idea who I was looking for. So that resource was nothing. ($800 bill for that btw, just came in the mail)
So out of desperation I went to yet another hospital ER. What other option did I have? None. Long story short, the people at the hospital couldn't/wouldn't help me. I explained everything to them, and let them know I just really needed help because the panic attacks are so debilitating. They said since another doctor prescribed me something they will give me nothing, and I left. They gave me resources to call as well. The first place, which is for low income people, I do not qualify for because my income is too high. (Imagine that, I'm right between being poor enough for help but not stable enough to afford insurance/not need help. Sigh).
There were a few other places I called, several of them were booked out for 2 or 3 months. A couple were just in no way affordable as I needed pretty urgent help. There was one place left. The reviews are all really bad on Google, but I guess I have nothing to lose. They told me it was open 24/7, which of course turned out not to be true. So I was supposed to go Friday but at this point I have to wait until Monday to even call, and cross my little fingers that I can even been seen on such short notice (and that I can afford it, too).
If that doesn't work I don't know what I will do. These hospitals aren't helping, I can't afford anything else, and the resources they give are so outdated the numbers don't even work on half. It's f**king infuriating. I'm desperate for help and all I want is to be able to get up and go to work without dealing with this panic. I went to a pharmacy today to fill the 2 prescriptions I originally got, and I was told I'd have to wait until Monday on one of them because the paper was a bit ripped. And the pharmacist wouldn't call the doctor to confirm until Monday (whatever, the phones work on weekends).
Not only is everything so unaffordable, this entire time every person I've talked to has been so rude and acts like they don't listen to a word I say. I've been as positive as I can through this ordeal and all the mental breakdowns that have come with it, but I'm so frustrated rn and losing all hope. I've lost so much weight because of all this stress, I can't keep going on this way physically OR mentally.
Maybe things will work out when I call the other office Monday, but I really don't know. It seems like every step of the way are a thousand obstacles. But I'm trying to hang in here the best I can.
If anyone has any advice, I'll gladly listen. I'm open to anything, including "alternative healing" or whatever you call it. I have a few crystals, books about ayurveda and similar topics, and two tarot decks. Admittedly, I have not been leaning into my spiritual side for this issue. Typing that out sounds dumb, why wouldn't I? But I guess it's just been hard on me all around.
2023.06.03 23:42 i_sell_insurance_ Can I please lay my head on your shoulder for a moment?
I appreciate you listening to me and reading this. I am so tired. I’ve been giving every piece of me possible to this life.
20F Today has been so heavy and heartwrenching that my guts actually physically hurt. I am so painfully isolated in life right now.
I am so misunderstood in my family- I’m not a Christian anymore. I am bisexual, but nobody believes me when I’ve come out. My sister even said ‘there’s always something new with you.’ My dad is an asshole- he’s a workaholic and comes into the house and yells at everybody when he’s had a bad day. He was insulting me over the phone the other so I hung up on him and he got mad at me telling me I need to be respectful to him. My mom tried to defend me to him and I overheard him say ‘everybody always has to walk on eggshells around her.’ I’m surprised my mom doesn’t have boot prints permanently pressed into her face from all the times my dad walks all over her. She brings up a grievance and he’ll say ‘stop nagging me, woman.’
What makes me even more chronically misunderstood is that I’m an artist in rural southern alberta. Not the kind of artist that paints a picture when they feel like it. I fucking bust my ass doing commissions and working on personal projects- I’m doing my best to get this insane career of the ground. Struggling to get ends to meet right now, but getting by. My sister was lecturing me about needing to get a job and getting insulting towards me. Comparing me to a missionary we both know who didn’t work to raise money for his missions trip, he just took donations. And said she didn’t want me to be like another girl we both know who has a mess of a life, had a baby she had to put up for adoption, and got fired from her dream job because she’s a bit of a hack.
She doesn’t understand that doing commissions is my job, it’s just that any business start up is fucking difficult. I’m also 20 and pioneering all this stuff with little to no help or understanding from the people closest to me. There’s not a corner of my life where I’m not completely misunderstood or thrown into a minority!!
Between faith, family, and my work I am in complete despair. I grind away every day and scrape myself off the ground when I’m always getting kicked while I’m down.
Don’t even get me started on mental health… my lovely Christian parents made it very clear from a young age that it’s been demons attacking me my whole life…. Not adhd and ocd.
submitted by i_sell_insurance_ to Exvangelical [link] [comments]
20F Today has been so heavy and heartwrenching that my guts actually physically hurt. I am so painfully isolated in life right now.
I am so misunderstood in my family- I’m not a Christian anymore. I am bisexual, but nobody believes me when I’ve come out. My sister even said ‘there’s always something new with you.’ My dad is an asshole- he’s a workaholic and comes into the house and yells at everybody when he’s had a bad day. He was insulting me over the phone the other so I hung up on him and he got mad at me telling me I need to be respectful to him. My mom tried to defend me to him and I overheard him say ‘everybody always has to walk on eggshells around her.’ I’m surprised my mom doesn’t have boot prints permanently pressed into her face from all the times my dad walks all over her. She brings up a grievance and he’ll say ‘stop nagging me, woman.’
What makes me even more chronically misunderstood is that I’m an artist in rural southern alberta. Not the kind of artist that paints a picture when they feel like it. I fucking bust my ass doing commissions and working on personal projects- I’m doing my best to get this insane career of the ground. Struggling to get ends to meet right now, but getting by. My sister was lecturing me about needing to get a job and getting insulting towards me. Comparing me to a missionary we both know who didn’t work to raise money for his missions trip, he just took donations. And said she didn’t want me to be like another girl we both know who has a mess of a life, had a baby she had to put up for adoption, and got fired from her dream job because she’s a bit of a hack.
She doesn’t understand that doing commissions is my job, it’s just that any business start up is fucking difficult. I’m also 20 and pioneering all this stuff with little to no help or understanding from the people closest to me. There’s not a corner of my life where I’m not completely misunderstood or thrown into a minority!!
Between faith, family, and my work I am in complete despair. I grind away every day and scrape myself off the ground when I’m always getting kicked while I’m down.
Don’t even get me started on mental health… my lovely Christian parents made it very clear from a young age that it’s been demons attacking me my whole life…. Not adhd and ocd.
2023.06.03 23:41 Available_Focus_558 AITA for hating my brother?
My brother is the worst person I know but my family keeps telling me to be easier on him because he has “mental health issues.” He has schizophrenia and bipolar disorder but I feel like it doesn’t excuse the things he’s done. He beat and cheated on his wife and when she said she didn’t want him near the children he sent her videos of him crying saying “I’m gonna die and never see my children again and you’re doing it to me” even though before he showed like zero interest in them. At one point they were both sick and crying and needed to go to the doctor but he told his wife they simply didn’t have the money then spent the night with prostitutes. And now he won’t leave his wife alone and keeps saying she’s ruining his life and bringing her his laundry to do cause he doesn’t know how.
Hears the thing, I know schizophrenia and bipolar disorder are serious illnesses. I know because I fucking have them too. We have the same genes and the same diagnoses but I take medication and manage to not be a piece of crap while he refuses to get better.
I guess I’m just wondering if I really need to be easier on him like my family says. I realize we all have different mental health journeys but he just seems like an all around bad guy.
submitted by Available_Focus_558 to AITAH [link] [comments]
Hears the thing, I know schizophrenia and bipolar disorder are serious illnesses. I know because I fucking have them too. We have the same genes and the same diagnoses but I take medication and manage to not be a piece of crap while he refuses to get better.
I guess I’m just wondering if I really need to be easier on him like my family says. I realize we all have different mental health journeys but he just seems like an all around bad guy.
2023.06.03 23:36 Ok-Sock3252 Tapering?
hey y’all :) Been on and off with my weed journey but am realized there is a pattern emerging when I cut cold Turkey—the withdrawls are overwhelming and even life-threatening to my mental and physical health. My mom has been suggesting that I find someone who can help me taper off so I’ll be less likely to go back to smoking than I would be if I cut cold Turkey. Although because weed is just now being regulated and taken more seriously, I don’t think we’re there yet with specialists who can do this. (Also - just so you know— I do it cold Turkey because I get disgusted with it and I don’t want it near me for the first day or so but then when the withdrawls come in and I end up smoking again)
Has anyone been successful tapering off of weed?
Thank you guys and much love ❤️❤️❤️
submitted by Ok-Sock3252 to leaves [link] [comments]
Has anyone been successful tapering off of weed?
Thank you guys and much love ❤️❤️❤️
2023.06.03 23:35 forkedfertilization Tweeps on Dineo Ranka, mental health
 | submitted by forkedfertilization to hopefularena [link] [comments] |
2023.06.03 23:35 DogAccomplished1401 Advice
I female 19 need advice from other mcdonalds employees or other people in general. UK Branch
I have worked at my store for a while now and since I started a shift runner has had it out for me since finding out she went to school with my uncle, everytime I'm put on one of her shifts she treats me like garbage, I have rang up twice now and been put down as a no show everytime she answers the phone all I get is abuse of her, this morning was the last straw my store don't open till 6am and no one arrives till 5 I started being sick at 5.50am and as soon as I stopped, I rang the store and she answered I told her I've been sick and won't be in. As soon I say that she says oh for god sake its always you well you could've rang hours ago as u meant start in half an hour I was in my uniform when I started being sick and I started this I apologise and I just got a whatever bye. I have been sick in the mornings twice since working at the store and They expect us to ring 2 hours before but how are we meant to if no one is there and you never know if your gonna be sick it isn't planned, any advice on what to do and should I report her to HR?
She also had the nerve to ask to come to my nans funeral after finding out she had passed and I lied saying family only, she has gotten to the point she is making my mental health spiral.
Any Advice on what to do about said shift runner would be amazing?
submitted by DogAccomplished1401 to McDonaldsUK [link] [comments]
I have worked at my store for a while now and since I started a shift runner has had it out for me since finding out she went to school with my uncle, everytime I'm put on one of her shifts she treats me like garbage, I have rang up twice now and been put down as a no show everytime she answers the phone all I get is abuse of her, this morning was the last straw my store don't open till 6am and no one arrives till 5 I started being sick at 5.50am and as soon as I stopped, I rang the store and she answered I told her I've been sick and won't be in. As soon I say that she says oh for god sake its always you well you could've rang hours ago as u meant start in half an hour I was in my uniform when I started being sick and I started this I apologise and I just got a whatever bye. I have been sick in the mornings twice since working at the store and They expect us to ring 2 hours before but how are we meant to if no one is there and you never know if your gonna be sick it isn't planned, any advice on what to do and should I report her to HR?
She also had the nerve to ask to come to my nans funeral after finding out she had passed and I lied saying family only, she has gotten to the point she is making my mental health spiral.
Any Advice on what to do about said shift runner would be amazing?
2023.06.03 23:33 forkedfertilization Tweeps on Dineo Ranka, mental health
| | submitted by forkedfertilization to mindless1 [link] [comments] |
2023.06.03 23:32 DogAccomplished1401 Advice
I female 19 need advice from other mcdonalds employees or other people in general. UK Branch
I have worked at my store for a while now and since I started a shift runner has had it out for me since finding out she went to school with my uncle, everytime I'm put on one of her shifts she treats me like garbage, I have rang up twice now and been put down as a no show everytime she answers the phone all I get is abuse of her, this morning was the last straw my store don't open till 6am and no one arrives till 5 I started being sick at 5.50am and as soon as I stopped, I rang the store and she answered I told her I've been sick and won't be in. As soon I say that she says oh for god sake its always you well you could've rang hours ago as u meant start in half an hour I was in my uniform when I started being sick and I started this I apologise and I just got a whatever bye. I have been sick in the mornings twice since working at the store and They expect us to ring 2 hours before but how are we meant to if no one is there and you never know if your gonna be sick it isn't planned, any advice on what to do and should I report her to HR?
She also had the nerve to ask to come to my nans funeral after finding out she had passed and I lied saying family only, she has gotten to the point she is making my mental health spiral.
Any Advice on what to do about said shift runner would be amazing?
submitted by DogAccomplished1401 to McDonaldsEmployees [link] [comments]
I have worked at my store for a while now and since I started a shift runner has had it out for me since finding out she went to school with my uncle, everytime I'm put on one of her shifts she treats me like garbage, I have rang up twice now and been put down as a no show everytime she answers the phone all I get is abuse of her, this morning was the last straw my store don't open till 6am and no one arrives till 5 I started being sick at 5.50am and as soon as I stopped, I rang the store and she answered I told her I've been sick and won't be in. As soon I say that she says oh for god sake its always you well you could've rang hours ago as u meant start in half an hour I was in my uniform when I started being sick and I started this I apologise and I just got a whatever bye. I have been sick in the mornings twice since working at the store and They expect us to ring 2 hours before but how are we meant to if no one is there and you never know if your gonna be sick it isn't planned, any advice on what to do and should I report her to HR?
She also had the nerve to ask to come to my nans funeral after finding out she had passed and I lied saying family only, she has gotten to the point she is making my mental health spiral.
Any Advice on what to do about said shift runner would be amazing?
2023.06.03 23:32 Vetstudent24 Advice on how to deal with this roommate/friend situation
This girl and I, who we can call Ash for the purpose of this story met during our first year of vet school. We met as roommates and we became friends. We even share a group of very close friends.
We got along great and maintained living together without much trouble, although she is very bossy. I am pretty much a easy-going person so it worked fine.
However, I am starting to reach my limit. For context, I am very ambitious and I love what I do. I snagged a research project with a reputable teacher. I don't talk much about it, only when prompted and I am starting to get pretty knowledgeable (FOR A STUDENT) in the field of my study (nephro). Ash would HYPE ME UP at every mention of anything relating to that field. Ash even began calling me corny endearing nicknames like "queen of nephrology" to anyone she meets. Naturally, if I had to go to meet my mentor or had to go see a patient, I would tell her where I am heading to. If I had a meeting and I couldn't go out with her, I would tell her why. And VERY seldom if I had an interesting update I would share it with Ash who I thought was genuinely happy for me and rooting for me. As I am always genuinely happy for her and rooting for her.
Recently, a close friend of our group informed me that Ash was talking smack about me and about another friend of the group who also has a research project. Saying that we think we are sooo much bettesuperior because we have research projects and that we are always "too busy" to hang out with her. The friend relaying the information was in complete disagreement.
I had noticed subtle signs of her being bitter towards me, such as making grimaces when I was happy about something or making fun of me in front of men. But I thought it was just me being too sensitive/delusional and that she was just being "not like the other girls".
We had just re-signed our lease together and financially I cannot move out. We have just one year left together and this upcoming year will be very busy so I won't be crossing paths too often with her (it is our clinical year and our schedules do not coordinate).
I know it is hard to trust my point of view 100%, but I trust my introspection and I despise haughty people. I would never think of myself as superior, ever. Especially not as a mere student...
I have been very encouraging, supportive and friendly. I've been supporting her through difficult times(issues with other people, health issues, death in the family and pets, depression) as well as good times. I felt a slap in the face when faced with this story because of this terrible disparity in character she has shown me.
But I feel this fakeness to be a deal-breaker and I would like to distance myself without causing a big thing out of it. How would you approach this situation knowing that you have to share a close space during a very stressful year? How do I preserve myself from investing too much of me in this relationship ?
Thank you.
TLDR: friend/roommate who I thought was rooting for me is actually talking negatively about me with other people and I am done investing too much of me for her. How do I separate myself cleanly while cohabitating with her?
submitted by Vetstudent24 to FriendshipAdvice [link] [comments]
We got along great and maintained living together without much trouble, although she is very bossy. I am pretty much a easy-going person so it worked fine.
However, I am starting to reach my limit. For context, I am very ambitious and I love what I do. I snagged a research project with a reputable teacher. I don't talk much about it, only when prompted and I am starting to get pretty knowledgeable (FOR A STUDENT) in the field of my study (nephro). Ash would HYPE ME UP at every mention of anything relating to that field. Ash even began calling me corny endearing nicknames like "queen of nephrology" to anyone she meets. Naturally, if I had to go to meet my mentor or had to go see a patient, I would tell her where I am heading to. If I had a meeting and I couldn't go out with her, I would tell her why. And VERY seldom if I had an interesting update I would share it with Ash who I thought was genuinely happy for me and rooting for me. As I am always genuinely happy for her and rooting for her.
Recently, a close friend of our group informed me that Ash was talking smack about me and about another friend of the group who also has a research project. Saying that we think we are sooo much bettesuperior because we have research projects and that we are always "too busy" to hang out with her. The friend relaying the information was in complete disagreement.
I had noticed subtle signs of her being bitter towards me, such as making grimaces when I was happy about something or making fun of me in front of men. But I thought it was just me being too sensitive/delusional and that she was just being "not like the other girls".
We had just re-signed our lease together and financially I cannot move out. We have just one year left together and this upcoming year will be very busy so I won't be crossing paths too often with her (it is our clinical year and our schedules do not coordinate).
I know it is hard to trust my point of view 100%, but I trust my introspection and I despise haughty people. I would never think of myself as superior, ever. Especially not as a mere student...
I have been very encouraging, supportive and friendly. I've been supporting her through difficult times(issues with other people, health issues, death in the family and pets, depression) as well as good times. I felt a slap in the face when faced with this story because of this terrible disparity in character she has shown me.
But I feel this fakeness to be a deal-breaker and I would like to distance myself without causing a big thing out of it. How would you approach this situation knowing that you have to share a close space during a very stressful year? How do I preserve myself from investing too much of me in this relationship ?
Thank you.
TLDR: friend/roommate who I thought was rooting for me is actually talking negatively about me with other people and I am done investing too much of me for her. How do I separate myself cleanly while cohabitating with her?
2023.06.03 23:32 urbancowgirl42 Why am I getting physically grabbed by grown-ass adults at school?
I am a music teacher, and next year will be year 20 for me. I am transitioning, not out of the classroom, but to a different age range and school district.
This school district has some really good folks, and I don’t want to retell the story, but check my post history if you are curious.
TL:DR- I was stalked this year, causing intense anxiety during concerts. Stalker moved, but I still decided to leave the district due to many other systemic issue, though I am immensely fond of my principals. Finally was diagnosed with ADHD during this mess and suddenly my life made sense, leading me to change to a more manageable position rather than leave teaching all together.
I have had a very stressful and curious issue this week. Due to the stalker issue, concerts became overwhelming as I was terrified of being hurt while my back was to the audience. I got some mental health treatment and managed to survive the year, until I had several issues this last week.
During the last concert this week, while I was managing a very intricate schedule and set-up, I was grabbed from behind. I nearly elbowed the grabber in the face due to the surprise and terror. It turned out to be a family member that wanted to compliment me on my son’s performance.
Why she felt the need to grab me, while I’m directing students, instead of approaching me from the front likely has an explanation, but honestly I’m not very interested, as it was not ok to do. I managed to pull it together and thank her for the compliment, but I was very rattled and very upset.
A day later, at the other school I teach at, a volunteer with a developmental delay was asking me a question. She is sad I’m leaving and I go out of my way to be kind of her. However, that day I was late getting to the high school, and I told her three times I couldn’t chat as I was late. As I moved away, she grabbed my arm and held me so I couldn’t leave.
I can’t tell if this is indicative of me being better with boundaries due to ADHD treatment and people reacting because I’ve changed, if it’s more indicative of the systemic issues and chaos of the district and community, or if it was just a shitty week. I will say a lot of other shitty behavior went on this week, too.
A boundary I’ve bern very firm with the past few weeks because I finally can be is that I won’t listen to more than one person at once. I put up my finger and make interrupters wait, and then I give them my full attention.
I mention this because it has resulted in me being grabbed by a lot of students, too. Neurodiverse and traumatized kids cluster in music, as it is a break from the daily grind they really struggle to manage. It’s not ok that the kids do that, either, but I’m more understanding and can manage it better. I also usually see it coming.
I don’t think I should have to explain to adults that it’s not ok to be grabbed in my workplace. I’m just struggling to interpret this trend, as it is new and I’m neurodivergent.
submitted by urbancowgirl42 to TeachersInTransition [link] [comments]
This school district has some really good folks, and I don’t want to retell the story, but check my post history if you are curious.
TL:DR- I was stalked this year, causing intense anxiety during concerts. Stalker moved, but I still decided to leave the district due to many other systemic issue, though I am immensely fond of my principals. Finally was diagnosed with ADHD during this mess and suddenly my life made sense, leading me to change to a more manageable position rather than leave teaching all together.
I have had a very stressful and curious issue this week. Due to the stalker issue, concerts became overwhelming as I was terrified of being hurt while my back was to the audience. I got some mental health treatment and managed to survive the year, until I had several issues this last week.
During the last concert this week, while I was managing a very intricate schedule and set-up, I was grabbed from behind. I nearly elbowed the grabber in the face due to the surprise and terror. It turned out to be a family member that wanted to compliment me on my son’s performance.
Why she felt the need to grab me, while I’m directing students, instead of approaching me from the front likely has an explanation, but honestly I’m not very interested, as it was not ok to do. I managed to pull it together and thank her for the compliment, but I was very rattled and very upset.
A day later, at the other school I teach at, a volunteer with a developmental delay was asking me a question. She is sad I’m leaving and I go out of my way to be kind of her. However, that day I was late getting to the high school, and I told her three times I couldn’t chat as I was late. As I moved away, she grabbed my arm and held me so I couldn’t leave.
I can’t tell if this is indicative of me being better with boundaries due to ADHD treatment and people reacting because I’ve changed, if it’s more indicative of the systemic issues and chaos of the district and community, or if it was just a shitty week. I will say a lot of other shitty behavior went on this week, too.
A boundary I’ve bern very firm with the past few weeks because I finally can be is that I won’t listen to more than one person at once. I put up my finger and make interrupters wait, and then I give them my full attention.
I mention this because it has resulted in me being grabbed by a lot of students, too. Neurodiverse and traumatized kids cluster in music, as it is a break from the daily grind they really struggle to manage. It’s not ok that the kids do that, either, but I’m more understanding and can manage it better. I also usually see it coming.
I don’t think I should have to explain to adults that it’s not ok to be grabbed in my workplace. I’m just struggling to interpret this trend, as it is new and I’m neurodivergent.
2023.06.03 23:31 forkedfertilization Tweeps on Dineo Ranka, mental health
| | submitted by forkedfertilization to u/forkedfertilization [link] [comments] |