Wexford house nursing home kingsport tn
I can't stand living with my FIL
2023.06.01 23:42 hellspawnofPlurge I can't stand living with my FIL
I (26F) have been with my husband (31M) for 2 and a half years (married for 6 months) and I have lived with him and his dad almost our whole relationship. I can see how our relationship and marriage probably seems very rushed but I don't have any issues with my husband himself so I don't really think that's relevant. And I guess I'm only here to rant so it probably doesn't even matter. I think to start I will say we bought our home just over 2 years ago. (I'm not going into the details here because it would make this post massive, but I'm happy to answer any questions in the comments if our timeline or living situation seems odd) My husband is independent and does well for himself. He's just always lived with his dad. They started a business together around 10 years ago, it's not big but it does well. They have no employees, and they work together and share a bank account. I guess it had just always made sense for them to live together since they shared funds that way. When we moved into our new home the plan was always to find a place his dad could live by himself (he will be 66 this year and at the time it didn't seem far fetched. My grandparents are independent well into their 70's after all) But things changed after his dad was hospitalized.
In short, he's never taken care of himself, and believes doctors are idiots. He ignored having high blood pressure for almost 10 years to my horror. He was held in the ICU for over 2 months after having 16 mini strokes and the removal of a brain tumor (1 of 2 tumors supposedly benign but I don't know all the details because it was a lot of information at the time) The doctors also said he has many other issues including early stage dementia.
Since leaving the hospital I've been very stern with him and make sure he's always taking his medicine and going to any doctors appointments that his primary needs him to attend.
It's been a nightmare ever since. I'm not heartless. I know it's not reasonable to make him live alone, I know he'd probably die very quickly.
But he's mean, and very demanding of my husbands attention. He doesn't have a good relationship with any of his other children (I think I was told my husband has 6 siblings but I've only met 1 and they're just not close) who all live very far away, and he has no friends so he exclusively relies on my husband for companionship.
My husband is a kind man and trying to make everyone happy. But if we ever want to go out I get put through the ringer because FIL hates when husband isn't home in the evenings and will yell at and berate him for abandoning him if we're gone for more than a couple of hours. If I have company over he complains that we're pushing him out of the house he lives in. We have to cook him separate meals because he is an extremely picky eater after being in the hospital. He complains endlessly but when solutions to his problems are offered he won't hear it. He smokes a whole pack of cigarettes and drinks half a case of Mountain Dew every day so his health isn't getting better.
I've already brought up retirement communitys with nursing care and check-ins (I think full on assisted living would be too cruel) but my husband won't hear it. He's too afraid of abandoning his dad. But I don't want to live with him. I want to be a young child free adult and live independently. I'm not going to leave my husband over this, he's probably having a worse time than me dealing with this.
I'm so depressed. I'm afraid that I'm just starting to wait for my FIL to die because it's the only way I'll have freedom in my own home
I feel absolutely rotten.
submitted by hellspawnofPlurge to TrueOffMyChest [link] [comments]
In short, he's never taken care of himself, and believes doctors are idiots. He ignored having high blood pressure for almost 10 years to my horror. He was held in the ICU for over 2 months after having 16 mini strokes and the removal of a brain tumor (1 of 2 tumors supposedly benign but I don't know all the details because it was a lot of information at the time) The doctors also said he has many other issues including early stage dementia.
Since leaving the hospital I've been very stern with him and make sure he's always taking his medicine and going to any doctors appointments that his primary needs him to attend.
It's been a nightmare ever since. I'm not heartless. I know it's not reasonable to make him live alone, I know he'd probably die very quickly.
But he's mean, and very demanding of my husbands attention. He doesn't have a good relationship with any of his other children (I think I was told my husband has 6 siblings but I've only met 1 and they're just not close) who all live very far away, and he has no friends so he exclusively relies on my husband for companionship.
My husband is a kind man and trying to make everyone happy. But if we ever want to go out I get put through the ringer because FIL hates when husband isn't home in the evenings and will yell at and berate him for abandoning him if we're gone for more than a couple of hours. If I have company over he complains that we're pushing him out of the house he lives in. We have to cook him separate meals because he is an extremely picky eater after being in the hospital. He complains endlessly but when solutions to his problems are offered he won't hear it. He smokes a whole pack of cigarettes and drinks half a case of Mountain Dew every day so his health isn't getting better.
I've already brought up retirement communitys with nursing care and check-ins (I think full on assisted living would be too cruel) but my husband won't hear it. He's too afraid of abandoning his dad. But I don't want to live with him. I want to be a young child free adult and live independently. I'm not going to leave my husband over this, he's probably having a worse time than me dealing with this.
I'm so depressed. I'm afraid that I'm just starting to wait for my FIL to die because it's the only way I'll have freedom in my own home
I feel absolutely rotten.
2023.06.01 22:35 Wild_girl_travels Positive experience with laparoscopic myomectomy
Hello ladies,
I wanted to share my story in the hopes this will give at least some of you a bit more comfort going into your surgery. I found there were lots of negative post surgery experiences here and in the wider realms of the internet, so I thought I should probably share a positive one too! I am now Day 10 post-op.
Surgery type: Laparoscopic myomectomy
Insurance: Private. Pre-diagnosis, ladies, not to sound like I am advertising private insurance, but even if you have a tiny inkling something might be wrong (but haven't been to the docs yet and no diagnosis), get private insurance - it gives you a bit of security that even if nothing is wrong you could have had the opportunity to get medical attention fastebetter quality.
Age: 32
Fitness level: High/athletic - I do lots of gym-ing, running, surfing, skating, cycling. I was a bit overweight in my early 20ties (not massively so, maybe like 2kgs over my BMI), so after my ovarian cyst surgery I was paranoid to get PCOS so I really changed my lifestyle around and got into sports, which now has turned into a lifestyle I can't really live without!
Living situation: Live on my own in a rural town, but close friends live nearby.
Previous surgery: Ovarian cyst surgery where they also had to remove my ovary (very large cyst) circa 10 years ago. Didn't have any symptoms back then even, just thought I had IBS (which I think a lot of us do) - turns out there was a cyst the size of a small basketball growing on my ovary, and they had to remove both...which sucks of course, but when your in your early 20ties you don't really think about how this may affect your future ability to have kids. Mine was an emergency surgery performed after I went to ER with crazy gas pain in tummy, in a foreign country, so overall this whole experience was really traumatic emotionally and I am still dealing with the aftermath of this.
Symptoms before surgery: No real symptoms - normal periods, bit of bloating (assumed IBS), bit of hormonal acne here and there. Been on birth control pill since my ovarian cyst surgery, so keeping hormones in check through that.
Diagnosis: I pulled what I thought was a hernia at the gym, went to GP, got a ultrasound which funnily enough found nothing, so they attributed it to a one off random told me to ease off exercise for a couple of weeks and start again. However, I instinctively knew something was wrong with my body, so TRUST YOUR GUT LADIES! Because I had a previous cyst and my ovary removed circa 10 years ago I got into real panic mode about my fertility, so I requested a referral to a OBGYN in case there was an issue with my other ovary. Note ladies, private insurance if you live in a country where healthcare is horrible is so important. I saw the OBGYN within a week, if that wasn't the case I would have needed to wait about 6-12 months to see one on the public system. OBGYN sent me for another ultrasound (this time transvaginal) and they originally didn't see any problem, but by the end of the app, they weren't quite sure what they had seen (useful, I know), so OBGYN sent me for an MRI. MRI found 1 med-large fibroid on uterus. I then had a long chat with OBGYN as to the best treatment type, and because of my age and the desire to have children she recommended removal through laparoscopic surgery.
Fibroid numbetype: 1 med-large subserosal fibroid 7cm, and the surgeon found two others ( 1 x 4cm and 1 x 1cm) during my surgery (did not see them on the MRI, I know crazy!). OBGYN also now suspects I have adenomyosis, which is something I will have to deal with once I have recovered from surgery. I know, fun!
Day of surgery: Had to only wait a month between my app with OBGYN and surgery (again, thanks insurance). Hospital was boujie as (had never been in private hopsital) and everything from the admission to surgery just felt like a well oiled machine which was really good to keep the stress levels down. I had my friend there with me and we chatted all the way until I got rolled away for surgery. Surgery lasted about 2 hrs.
Waking up post-surgery: I woke up to see 2 nurses monitoring my vitals, and they rolled me to my room where my friend was waiting. I was pretty out of it and asked some silly question to my friend, which I am sure she loved sharing with our friend group. I had an afternoon surgery so I was in my room by dinnertime, but believe you me I did not want to eat anything. I drank lots of water overnight, and they kept coming in to check my vitals and give me pain and anti-nausea meds + laxatives and some other stuff that helps with heartburn etc.
Day 1 post op: In hospital, had a bit to eat for brekkie (eggs - high protein), they took my catheter out from my lady parts, so I can pee by myself. Didn't hurt at all taking it out (also they put the catheter in while you're under so you feel nothing). Went for my first pee, went for a little ponder round hospital (about 5mins in the hallways), and spent the rest of day watching series, reading etc. Pain was totally fine, and I was just on paracetamols etc., didn't need anything stronger. Had pretty bad nausea, but they kept me topped up for that. Lots of sleeping, but generally because of the pain meds I didn't feel any pain at all! Getting in and out of bed was a bit hard, but I have really strong arms from surfing so i was able to push myself up quite easily. Every hour or so, I tried to get up and do a couple of laps (5-10min) in the hallway. Because I was doing fine and was mobile, I could do this by myself, but there were lots of people who did the same thing but needed to be accompanied by a nurse. Drink lots of water gals, this will help with triggering your need to pee independently and getting your bowels moving, and also helps flush your body.
Important things to make your stay at hospital more comfy: Loose low rise sweatpants - I actually bought a pair a size too big so it was more comfy. Oversized t-shirts and jumpers, something you can easily put over the catheter in your arm. I-pad (life saver for me, I could catch up on netflix), magazines or crosswords. I had a book, but my brain was deffos not ready to engage while I was still in hospital. Electrolyte drinks - these were incredible and really helped to get my bowels moving too! Heat wrap - they had some in the hospital, and they're essential pain relief for anesthetic leaving your body pain (my right shoulder was in pain) - they kept heating it up round the clock which was so GOOD.
Day 2: Discharge day/first day at home - they would not discharge me until I had a bowel movement, so I was drinking water like crazy to help trigger some gut movement. Otherwise you will have to shove pills up your bum to get the party started. Luckily for me all of my drinking, and eating regular, yet small meals during Day 1 did the trick! My friend came to pick me up and we had a 2 hrs drive to get home, and this was not something I had thought about before. This was probably the worst part of my entire experience. I was so motion sick the entire way home, that the car had to be made into a freezer (AC pumping) and I had to do deep breathing all the way home not to throw up (which I did when I got home, but thankfully not in caon roadside). Once I got home, I pretty much just dropped into my bed and slept for about 5 hrs. I threw up once, while clutching a pillow to my abdomen to make it hurt less. Did some small walks around the house, friends dropped off some food, so I didn't have to cook or anything. People dropped in really regularly to check on me. My friends bought me heat packs for shoulder pain (still from anesthetic and gas leaving your body), and it was the best.
Day 3: Started day off with small walk outside to the post box and back, felt exhausted afterwards, but with little pain. I clutched a soft pillow to my abdomen while doing so (just felt more comfortable this way). I was managing with paracetamol every 6 hours, irrespective of whether I felt in pain or not. This is what docs advised on discharge. I had no pain really, discomfort in my tummy area sure, mainly just felt odd with the stiches. What I found hardest was breathing while walking (I know, weird right), I felt really out of breath every time I tried to go for a longer walk (200m plus). I just listened to my body and stopped when this happened, while also attempting to increase the length I walked bit by bit to train my lungs. Bowel movement back to normal pretty much, some light bleeding (doc said this is normal), but stomach was huge (as in 6 month pregnant huge). I called my doc as I was concerned about why it's so large, she said it's normal and swelling should subside in a couple of weeks (yikes!). I was drinking lots of water (2-3L a day), and eating a primarily veggie & high protein diet. I cut dairy, red meat an processed foods out during my recovery as I had read this helps. Ate a lot of kiwi fruit to help my bowels. Overall, by day 3 I did some light house work and did about 2 hrs of work (e-mails etc.)
Day 4: Walked about 1km in the morning, felt tired after so took a nap. Pain almost completely gone, bowels normal, no more spotting/bleeding. Feeling almost normal (ish). Did some housework, couple hours of work. Another 1km walk later in the arvo. Diet still restricted to protein, fibre, no dairy, no red meat and not processed foods.
Day 5: Dropped my meds, as I did not feel pain at all, my stomach felt fine, and tummy swelling had gone down. Felt okay all day, bit bloated, but walking really helped. Did about 2km walk in mooning and 2km walk in arvo, with small stints of walking around the house all day. Still more tired than normal, so lots of resting & naps.
Days 6-10: Nearly back to normal (well normal-ish) - no pain, everything regular, have been off painkillers for 5 days. Introduced dairy back into diet, felt fine. Had an ice cream :) Increased walk length to 3-5kms per walk (2 x daily) - feeling puffed still, lungs still feeling exhausted during walking but getting better every day. Have been doing about 5-6 hrs of work each day, while still taking lots of mini break for naps and resting.
Day 10: (today) - OBGYN has cleared me for short drives with car (initially she said 3 weeks no driving), as I have been off pain meds for over 5 days and feeling fit and alert. I feel almost normal to be honest, the area where the stiches are feels a bit tender, and still a bit swollen, but swelling has gone down heaps. Hoping to keep upping my walk distances and that my lungs will catch up slowly.
Something I really struggled with: Emotionally, I was a bit of a wreck after surgery. The additional diagnosis of adenomyosis really left me questioning whether I will be able to have children in the future, so I had a good cry with my friends about it (whom immediately jumped in to be surrogates). I'm trying to not think about it too much during recovery, but it's something that is heavily weighing on my mind as one of the main 'side effects' is infertility. I am hopefully going to see a fertility specialist after I have recovered to talk about my options. Obvs doesn't help that I am single, but I am so ready to be a mom (emotionally and financially), so am I ready to explore what else is out there for me to hopefully start on a journey that will lead me towards a wee addition to my solo independent lady family.
Also, I struggled with just being and home and not doing ANYTHING. I am normally really active and exercise helps me to relieve stress and sleep better, so not being able to do that has been driving me up the wall. I am very lucky to be self employed so I have no pressure from anyone else to get back to work, but I feel guilty for doing little work for over 10 days. I'm a workaholic, so it's really hard for me to 'just rest.' I will hopefully go back to working full time from next week, but I will really need to check myself to not be 'overdoing' it and set myself back in recovery.
Key takeaways: If you feel up for it, get up and start doing small walks as soon as you can after surgery - this well help get your bowels moving and heal faster. Drink lots of water! Eat a diet that's high in protein & fibre (pre and post op for sure), cut out dairy, red meat and processed food if you can. I am a young fit adult and this really helped with recovery as my body is trained to be under stress and has a high pain threshold, by being fit my recovery is up to 3-5 faster than an average person. Even if you're not fit now, there's a lot of studies (goggle them, I kid you not) suggesting that physical training before surgery, like gym exercises or running boosts the odds of a good outcome, so if you've got your surgery scheduled for a couple of months time see if you can incorporate some exercise in your daily routine.
Also you might be okay psychically, but it's okay if you feel like a mess emotionally. A good network of close females was so important for me. I cried, I laughed and I felt supported by them in allowing me to talk through my emotional trauma, especially relating to the potential fertility issues in the future. Anything to do with woman's health for me has been so hard to talk about, as it feels so personal, and you feel less of a 'normal female' if you have fertility issues. Most of my life I have been trying to avoid even thinking about it, so it felt so nice to just let it all out! I really hope you all have those people in your life you can open up to and be vulnerable around!
Having the support of close friends/family will be key while you're in hospital and for the first week or so - I could have never done this without my close friend group, they were with me at the hospital and took turns bringing food and drink and attending to most of my whims while I was at home, so make sure you have some support with you during this time!
Anyways, I hope my essay helped someone - I think I can put my good experience down to 3 simple factors: excellent pre-existing fitness, private health insurance and having a good movement regime/diet structure post-surgery.
submitted by Wild_girl_travels to Fibroids [link] [comments]
I wanted to share my story in the hopes this will give at least some of you a bit more comfort going into your surgery. I found there were lots of negative post surgery experiences here and in the wider realms of the internet, so I thought I should probably share a positive one too! I am now Day 10 post-op.
Surgery type: Laparoscopic myomectomy
Insurance: Private. Pre-diagnosis, ladies, not to sound like I am advertising private insurance, but even if you have a tiny inkling something might be wrong (but haven't been to the docs yet and no diagnosis), get private insurance - it gives you a bit of security that even if nothing is wrong you could have had the opportunity to get medical attention fastebetter quality.
Age: 32
Fitness level: High/athletic - I do lots of gym-ing, running, surfing, skating, cycling. I was a bit overweight in my early 20ties (not massively so, maybe like 2kgs over my BMI), so after my ovarian cyst surgery I was paranoid to get PCOS so I really changed my lifestyle around and got into sports, which now has turned into a lifestyle I can't really live without!
Living situation: Live on my own in a rural town, but close friends live nearby.
Previous surgery: Ovarian cyst surgery where they also had to remove my ovary (very large cyst) circa 10 years ago. Didn't have any symptoms back then even, just thought I had IBS (which I think a lot of us do) - turns out there was a cyst the size of a small basketball growing on my ovary, and they had to remove both...which sucks of course, but when your in your early 20ties you don't really think about how this may affect your future ability to have kids. Mine was an emergency surgery performed after I went to ER with crazy gas pain in tummy, in a foreign country, so overall this whole experience was really traumatic emotionally and I am still dealing with the aftermath of this.
Symptoms before surgery: No real symptoms - normal periods, bit of bloating (assumed IBS), bit of hormonal acne here and there. Been on birth control pill since my ovarian cyst surgery, so keeping hormones in check through that.
Diagnosis: I pulled what I thought was a hernia at the gym, went to GP, got a ultrasound which funnily enough found nothing, so they attributed it to a one off random told me to ease off exercise for a couple of weeks and start again. However, I instinctively knew something was wrong with my body, so TRUST YOUR GUT LADIES! Because I had a previous cyst and my ovary removed circa 10 years ago I got into real panic mode about my fertility, so I requested a referral to a OBGYN in case there was an issue with my other ovary. Note ladies, private insurance if you live in a country where healthcare is horrible is so important. I saw the OBGYN within a week, if that wasn't the case I would have needed to wait about 6-12 months to see one on the public system. OBGYN sent me for another ultrasound (this time transvaginal) and they originally didn't see any problem, but by the end of the app, they weren't quite sure what they had seen (useful, I know), so OBGYN sent me for an MRI. MRI found 1 med-large fibroid on uterus. I then had a long chat with OBGYN as to the best treatment type, and because of my age and the desire to have children she recommended removal through laparoscopic surgery.
Fibroid numbetype: 1 med-large subserosal fibroid 7cm, and the surgeon found two others ( 1 x 4cm and 1 x 1cm) during my surgery (did not see them on the MRI, I know crazy!). OBGYN also now suspects I have adenomyosis, which is something I will have to deal with once I have recovered from surgery. I know, fun!
Day of surgery: Had to only wait a month between my app with OBGYN and surgery (again, thanks insurance). Hospital was boujie as (had never been in private hopsital) and everything from the admission to surgery just felt like a well oiled machine which was really good to keep the stress levels down. I had my friend there with me and we chatted all the way until I got rolled away for surgery. Surgery lasted about 2 hrs.
Waking up post-surgery: I woke up to see 2 nurses monitoring my vitals, and they rolled me to my room where my friend was waiting. I was pretty out of it and asked some silly question to my friend, which I am sure she loved sharing with our friend group. I had an afternoon surgery so I was in my room by dinnertime, but believe you me I did not want to eat anything. I drank lots of water overnight, and they kept coming in to check my vitals and give me pain and anti-nausea meds + laxatives and some other stuff that helps with heartburn etc.
Day 1 post op: In hospital, had a bit to eat for brekkie (eggs - high protein), they took my catheter out from my lady parts, so I can pee by myself. Didn't hurt at all taking it out (also they put the catheter in while you're under so you feel nothing). Went for my first pee, went for a little ponder round hospital (about 5mins in the hallways), and spent the rest of day watching series, reading etc. Pain was totally fine, and I was just on paracetamols etc., didn't need anything stronger. Had pretty bad nausea, but they kept me topped up for that. Lots of sleeping, but generally because of the pain meds I didn't feel any pain at all! Getting in and out of bed was a bit hard, but I have really strong arms from surfing so i was able to push myself up quite easily. Every hour or so, I tried to get up and do a couple of laps (5-10min) in the hallway. Because I was doing fine and was mobile, I could do this by myself, but there were lots of people who did the same thing but needed to be accompanied by a nurse. Drink lots of water gals, this will help with triggering your need to pee independently and getting your bowels moving, and also helps flush your body.
Important things to make your stay at hospital more comfy: Loose low rise sweatpants - I actually bought a pair a size too big so it was more comfy. Oversized t-shirts and jumpers, something you can easily put over the catheter in your arm. I-pad (life saver for me, I could catch up on netflix), magazines or crosswords. I had a book, but my brain was deffos not ready to engage while I was still in hospital. Electrolyte drinks - these were incredible and really helped to get my bowels moving too! Heat wrap - they had some in the hospital, and they're essential pain relief for anesthetic leaving your body pain (my right shoulder was in pain) - they kept heating it up round the clock which was so GOOD.
Day 2: Discharge day/first day at home - they would not discharge me until I had a bowel movement, so I was drinking water like crazy to help trigger some gut movement. Otherwise you will have to shove pills up your bum to get the party started. Luckily for me all of my drinking, and eating regular, yet small meals during Day 1 did the trick! My friend came to pick me up and we had a 2 hrs drive to get home, and this was not something I had thought about before. This was probably the worst part of my entire experience. I was so motion sick the entire way home, that the car had to be made into a freezer (AC pumping) and I had to do deep breathing all the way home not to throw up (which I did when I got home, but thankfully not in caon roadside). Once I got home, I pretty much just dropped into my bed and slept for about 5 hrs. I threw up once, while clutching a pillow to my abdomen to make it hurt less. Did some small walks around the house, friends dropped off some food, so I didn't have to cook or anything. People dropped in really regularly to check on me. My friends bought me heat packs for shoulder pain (still from anesthetic and gas leaving your body), and it was the best.
Day 3: Started day off with small walk outside to the post box and back, felt exhausted afterwards, but with little pain. I clutched a soft pillow to my abdomen while doing so (just felt more comfortable this way). I was managing with paracetamol every 6 hours, irrespective of whether I felt in pain or not. This is what docs advised on discharge. I had no pain really, discomfort in my tummy area sure, mainly just felt odd with the stiches. What I found hardest was breathing while walking (I know, weird right), I felt really out of breath every time I tried to go for a longer walk (200m plus). I just listened to my body and stopped when this happened, while also attempting to increase the length I walked bit by bit to train my lungs. Bowel movement back to normal pretty much, some light bleeding (doc said this is normal), but stomach was huge (as in 6 month pregnant huge). I called my doc as I was concerned about why it's so large, she said it's normal and swelling should subside in a couple of weeks (yikes!). I was drinking lots of water (2-3L a day), and eating a primarily veggie & high protein diet. I cut dairy, red meat an processed foods out during my recovery as I had read this helps. Ate a lot of kiwi fruit to help my bowels. Overall, by day 3 I did some light house work and did about 2 hrs of work (e-mails etc.)
Day 4: Walked about 1km in the morning, felt tired after so took a nap. Pain almost completely gone, bowels normal, no more spotting/bleeding. Feeling almost normal (ish). Did some housework, couple hours of work. Another 1km walk later in the arvo. Diet still restricted to protein, fibre, no dairy, no red meat and not processed foods.
Day 5: Dropped my meds, as I did not feel pain at all, my stomach felt fine, and tummy swelling had gone down. Felt okay all day, bit bloated, but walking really helped. Did about 2km walk in mooning and 2km walk in arvo, with small stints of walking around the house all day. Still more tired than normal, so lots of resting & naps.
Days 6-10: Nearly back to normal (well normal-ish) - no pain, everything regular, have been off painkillers for 5 days. Introduced dairy back into diet, felt fine. Had an ice cream :) Increased walk length to 3-5kms per walk (2 x daily) - feeling puffed still, lungs still feeling exhausted during walking but getting better every day. Have been doing about 5-6 hrs of work each day, while still taking lots of mini break for naps and resting.
Day 10: (today) - OBGYN has cleared me for short drives with car (initially she said 3 weeks no driving), as I have been off pain meds for over 5 days and feeling fit and alert. I feel almost normal to be honest, the area where the stiches are feels a bit tender, and still a bit swollen, but swelling has gone down heaps. Hoping to keep upping my walk distances and that my lungs will catch up slowly.
Something I really struggled with: Emotionally, I was a bit of a wreck after surgery. The additional diagnosis of adenomyosis really left me questioning whether I will be able to have children in the future, so I had a good cry with my friends about it (whom immediately jumped in to be surrogates). I'm trying to not think about it too much during recovery, but it's something that is heavily weighing on my mind as one of the main 'side effects' is infertility. I am hopefully going to see a fertility specialist after I have recovered to talk about my options. Obvs doesn't help that I am single, but I am so ready to be a mom (emotionally and financially), so am I ready to explore what else is out there for me to hopefully start on a journey that will lead me towards a wee addition to my solo independent lady family.
Also, I struggled with just being and home and not doing ANYTHING. I am normally really active and exercise helps me to relieve stress and sleep better, so not being able to do that has been driving me up the wall. I am very lucky to be self employed so I have no pressure from anyone else to get back to work, but I feel guilty for doing little work for over 10 days. I'm a workaholic, so it's really hard for me to 'just rest.' I will hopefully go back to working full time from next week, but I will really need to check myself to not be 'overdoing' it and set myself back in recovery.
Key takeaways: If you feel up for it, get up and start doing small walks as soon as you can after surgery - this well help get your bowels moving and heal faster. Drink lots of water! Eat a diet that's high in protein & fibre (pre and post op for sure), cut out dairy, red meat and processed food if you can. I am a young fit adult and this really helped with recovery as my body is trained to be under stress and has a high pain threshold, by being fit my recovery is up to 3-5 faster than an average person. Even if you're not fit now, there's a lot of studies (goggle them, I kid you not) suggesting that physical training before surgery, like gym exercises or running boosts the odds of a good outcome, so if you've got your surgery scheduled for a couple of months time see if you can incorporate some exercise in your daily routine.
Also you might be okay psychically, but it's okay if you feel like a mess emotionally. A good network of close females was so important for me. I cried, I laughed and I felt supported by them in allowing me to talk through my emotional trauma, especially relating to the potential fertility issues in the future. Anything to do with woman's health for me has been so hard to talk about, as it feels so personal, and you feel less of a 'normal female' if you have fertility issues. Most of my life I have been trying to avoid even thinking about it, so it felt so nice to just let it all out! I really hope you all have those people in your life you can open up to and be vulnerable around!
Having the support of close friends/family will be key while you're in hospital and for the first week or so - I could have never done this without my close friend group, they were with me at the hospital and took turns bringing food and drink and attending to most of my whims while I was at home, so make sure you have some support with you during this time!
Anyways, I hope my essay helped someone - I think I can put my good experience down to 3 simple factors: excellent pre-existing fitness, private health insurance and having a good movement regime/diet structure post-surgery.
2023.06.01 21:35 matttTHEcat Bat Encounter 3am, Wisconsin
Hello!
Just thought I'd share my story. The other night, I had fallen asleep on the couch in the den (tri-level home) after watching TV with the girlfriend. She asked if I wanted to go to bed, to which I responded with a dismissive sleepy jumble of almost-words. She let the dog out at this time, around midnight, and went up to bed - closing herself and the dog in our bedroom upstairs. I was sleeping on my back, hands across my chest, when I wake up a number of hours later, suddenly, with an ominous "WTF" feeling. We have two cats, and I'm used to them running around in a frenzy in the middle of the night. But this feeling was different, and enough to make me jump up off of the couch, grab a blanket, and run upstairs. The first (admittedly groggy) images I have in my head, waking up at 3 in the morning, are those of a bat flying away me and up the stairs leading into the living room. I run after it with the blanket, turn on the lights, open the front door, and try to catch it or encourage it out into the cool evening air. It was the middle of the night and if I could do this over with a clearer head I'd have focused solely on catching it safely. But it was hectic and I had just woken up in a startled daze and, as many of you know, clear thoughts don't always come easily in situations like these. I chase the thing around the house trying to keep tabs on it before, about 10-15 minutes later, my girlfriend wakes up thinking I'm hallucinating (or on drugs - nice!). I assure her this isn't the case and that there is a bat in the house. She comes out, screaming bloody murder (in the middle of the night in a sleepy suburb, mind you) and the house devolves into pure chaos. We eventually regain our composure and tag-team securing the pets and getting the bat out of the house without handling it. It flies out into the night, and that's that. Or so I thought. We were a bit startled and chocked-full of adrenaline but, after a couple of hours, were able to fall asleep.
Next day, girlfriend leaves for work. Continuing reading some material from the night prior (post...."event"), I realized that I should 1. Check my body for any bites and 2. Probably call the doc regardless. I knew finding a bite would likely prove difficult or impossible, as most times a bite is so small that it can easily go unnoticed. I also figured the chance it actually bit me would have to be astronomically low, right? Then I looked at my right hand. You see, this hand has a scar on it. It's a fairly new scar, within the last 6 months, and as such I am hyper aware of it. In fact, for reasons beyond the scope of this post, I sometimes give my girlfriend a hard time about its existence (you can let your mind run wild with the context behind this). I know that scar. And I know that hand. Moving up from the scar, about an inch or two north-northeast, is a tiny, freshly scabbed dot and a faint scratch about a centimeter further from that. I feel disbelief and shock. But i take a picture of it, zoom in...and sure enough, that looks like a tiny puncture and related scratch. Well, long story somewhat shorter, I called the doc and had an appointment scheduled with urgent care that day. When I get there, the nurse takes a look at it and says: "oh! That's the most legitimate looking bite we've ever seen after an unknown exposure with a bat".
So I've gotten four shots so far, one in each arm and one in each leg. The leg needles are huge and the nurse catches me looking at them. "We try to get it as deep as we can. I'm sorry!"
But she called me a champ, so that's pretty cool I guess. And it beats the alternative. And I still friggin love bats!
Just thought I'd share my story about winning the shittiest lottery ever. 12 more shots to go!
Edit: I think I only get one dose of immunoglobin, which is during the first visit. So actually only 9 more shots to go! Things are looking up ahaha
submitted by matttTHEcat to batty [link] [comments]
Just thought I'd share my story. The other night, I had fallen asleep on the couch in the den (tri-level home) after watching TV with the girlfriend. She asked if I wanted to go to bed, to which I responded with a dismissive sleepy jumble of almost-words. She let the dog out at this time, around midnight, and went up to bed - closing herself and the dog in our bedroom upstairs. I was sleeping on my back, hands across my chest, when I wake up a number of hours later, suddenly, with an ominous "WTF" feeling. We have two cats, and I'm used to them running around in a frenzy in the middle of the night. But this feeling was different, and enough to make me jump up off of the couch, grab a blanket, and run upstairs. The first (admittedly groggy) images I have in my head, waking up at 3 in the morning, are those of a bat flying away me and up the stairs leading into the living room. I run after it with the blanket, turn on the lights, open the front door, and try to catch it or encourage it out into the cool evening air. It was the middle of the night and if I could do this over with a clearer head I'd have focused solely on catching it safely. But it was hectic and I had just woken up in a startled daze and, as many of you know, clear thoughts don't always come easily in situations like these. I chase the thing around the house trying to keep tabs on it before, about 10-15 minutes later, my girlfriend wakes up thinking I'm hallucinating (or on drugs - nice!). I assure her this isn't the case and that there is a bat in the house. She comes out, screaming bloody murder (in the middle of the night in a sleepy suburb, mind you) and the house devolves into pure chaos. We eventually regain our composure and tag-team securing the pets and getting the bat out of the house without handling it. It flies out into the night, and that's that. Or so I thought. We were a bit startled and chocked-full of adrenaline but, after a couple of hours, were able to fall asleep.
Next day, girlfriend leaves for work. Continuing reading some material from the night prior (post...."event"), I realized that I should 1. Check my body for any bites and 2. Probably call the doc regardless. I knew finding a bite would likely prove difficult or impossible, as most times a bite is so small that it can easily go unnoticed. I also figured the chance it actually bit me would have to be astronomically low, right? Then I looked at my right hand. You see, this hand has a scar on it. It's a fairly new scar, within the last 6 months, and as such I am hyper aware of it. In fact, for reasons beyond the scope of this post, I sometimes give my girlfriend a hard time about its existence (you can let your mind run wild with the context behind this). I know that scar. And I know that hand. Moving up from the scar, about an inch or two north-northeast, is a tiny, freshly scabbed dot and a faint scratch about a centimeter further from that. I feel disbelief and shock. But i take a picture of it, zoom in...and sure enough, that looks like a tiny puncture and related scratch. Well, long story somewhat shorter, I called the doc and had an appointment scheduled with urgent care that day. When I get there, the nurse takes a look at it and says: "oh! That's the most legitimate looking bite we've ever seen after an unknown exposure with a bat".
So I've gotten four shots so far, one in each arm and one in each leg. The leg needles are huge and the nurse catches me looking at them. "We try to get it as deep as we can. I'm sorry!"
But she called me a champ, so that's pretty cool I guess. And it beats the alternative. And I still friggin love bats!
Just thought I'd share my story about winning the shittiest lottery ever. 12 more shots to go!
Edit: I think I only get one dose of immunoglobin, which is during the first visit. So actually only 9 more shots to go! Things are looking up ahaha
2023.06.01 21:21 ProposalEcstatic3944 URGENT ADOPTERS Needed- North Carolina (Raleigh-Durham area)- Help Jax, Chaz and Princess Find Homes
 | đ· PLEASE share this post đ· submitted by ProposalEcstatic3944 to AnimalRescues [link] [comments] These 3 dogs are hanging at Charley's House for their rescues and they REALLY need your attention NOW. As everyone now knows, Charley's House could possibly go up for sale. In order to secure the house, they want $10k due diligence money. I'm halfway there. đ· The ONLY way I can save Charley's House is working my ass off to take more training clients for rescues so that I can get this due diligence money that secures the house. (I currently have a waitlist) Unfortunately this means that dogs that finished their training program and live here for "maintenance" NEED to be placed. The first dog is Jax. I have had Jax in my home since 7/30/2022. He completed his 8 week behavior program and has been waiting MONTHS for someone to notice him. His rescue pays $100/week to keep him here and keep him safe. So what does Jax need? Jax needs a fully fenced yard so he can run and play. He has a VERY high mental energy. Jax's bare minimum should be two walks a day, fetch in the yard, structured feeding event, and he even likes to do command work. He's dog friendly, house trained, and crate trained. He doesn't care about my cats. He's highly treat, food, and toy motivated. He loves to "trade up". He does GREAT in public. I've only seen him with my kid and he's 11+. The next boy is Chaz. Chaz finished his behavioral program on May 5th. He's an incredible amazing dog. He's house trained, crate trained, snuggly, sweet. He grunts to talk to you when he sees you. He rarely jumps on me, has GREAT recall and he's met a few of my personal pack members with ease. Chaz is a dream to walk on leash. He has done beautifully in public. He wants to please and make you happy. He prefers to meet humans on walks so he needs special introductions but he's happy to sit in his crate while you have guests over if there's no time for proper introductions. And then there's Princess. I don't know how the hell Princess is still available. I don't get it one bit. First of all- SHE'S BEAUTIFUL. Second of all- she loves everyone she meets. Princess is amazing on leash, does wonderfully in public, and she knows basic obedience commands. She also does this cute little "awoo" when she has something to say. She's also dog friendly but does much better with males. She hasn't really been around kids and she doesn't like the resident cats but after 571 days in the shelter and over a year in rescue... COME ON! If you know me, then you know telling these rescues yesterday that they have to find another place for their dogs absolutely devastated me. I invest my heart and soul into these dogs. Like truly love these 3 dogs with my entire life. I'd adopt them myself but I already have 6 of my own. These dogs must leave Charley's House by 6/15 so I can continue to work to secure the house. Charley's House has helped nearly 550 Charley's dogs plus close to 50 dogs for other rescues. That's nearly 600 dogs we have impacted since we moved here the end of October 2020. Top that off: that's nearly 600 pitbulls we've impacted. This house has helped whelp litters, helped adopter's have a safe and reliable option for vacations, helped rescues with their hardest dogs, taught my son to bottlefeed pups, and been the reason we very rarely have to use boarding. We need to be able to continue our work so I need to be able to take more training clients to get the last $5k. You can't donate to this for a tax write off because the house is being secured in my name, not the non-profits for a ton of tiny, legal reasons... but if you have $5k and don't care about a tax write off, just go ahead and PM me. đ· Anyways, June 15th... 3 dogs I have worked my butt off with will need to find fosteadoptive families. I very much prefer they stay in the Raleigh/Durham area, as the package these rescues paid for includes adopter's home integration help as well. Original post- https://www.facebook.com/nicole.a.blanton/posts/6860149553999926 Jax is with Tails of the Unwanted Chaz is with Operation Save a Shelter Dog Princess is with Chasin' Tail Rescue https://preview.redd.it/iwqj03mjig3b1.jpg?width=1536&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=724029c519ff3a68159cc6a3dba37dc3908ae38f https://preview.redd.it/d76y08mjig3b1.jpg?width=1536&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1ab5ab9d4ce7156a05d8adf8825621b1de1aeee9 https://preview.redd.it/6rs3t3mjig3b1.jpg?width=1307&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c992080284e5e8d1a29b26becac0db2aad2d0322 |
2023.06.01 21:08 ArcticDragon-31 Went to get my first allergy injection yesterday. Mom yelled at me over the phone every step of the way.
I (18f) needed to call her so I could make sure she wouldnât need me on the days I would get my next injection. The injections will be weekly for several months, and thatâs only for this specific injection.
She preceded to yell:
submitted by ArcticDragon-31 to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]
She preceded to yell:
- âthis has to be done weekly?! You know we have a very busy schedule!â (Iâve told both her and dad that this would be a weekly commitment multiple times)
- âwe are gone for a couple weeks during the summer! Why did they make you wait until now? Itâs incredibly stupid! Youâre probably gonna have to hold off until later!â (Once again, I explained multiple times that they wanted to wait until allergy season was about over to make sure any reaction I got was actually from the injection. I also tried to explain that they were lenient; that if I missed a dose, I could make it up. It took about six times until it finally got through moms head.)
- (when asking to miss one trip so I wouldnât have to redo an injection) âyou canât just stay home during our trips! Your grandfather needs help, and we are still working on the house!â And âyou canât drive back home just for an injection; youâll need to wait until we all get back!â (Never once have Iâve been allowed to stay behind from these âtripsâ. No matter if I have homework, an upcoming test, I have no choice but to go either to work on the house or play babysitter. There is no internet connection to bring my work with me, and this has been going on for 7 years. And now that Iâm looking for a job this summer, I bet mom will still try and convince me to help renovate the house).
- âwhy are you starting off with cat, dog, and dust mite allergies? Youâre not even allergic to them! (Itâs minimal, but apparently I am allergic. Once again, I told mom numerous times that my allergist wanted my to get injections for those before I start with my severe pollen and grass allergies, just to see how well I manage.)
- âare you SURE this is not a steroid injection?!â (Iâve lost count how many times I told her this is NOT a steroid)
- âif this gets rid of your allergies, why is this not offered to everyone? I think itâs very stupid that this isnât offered for everyone those nurses are keeping it from people who need itâŠ.â (At this point I didnât know what to say and did my best to wrap up the call so I could actually get my injection.)
2023.06.01 20:54 Emmie89509 Housing, Education, Furniture, Legal Information
Housing Information
City of boston Rental Relief Program is offering $15000 grant âThe Rental Relief Fund provides up to $15,000 in rental and utility assistance for income eligible households for up to 12 months. Eligible households can receive assistance for both back rent and rent going forward. Households receiving assistance for future rent will need to recertify income every 3 months to verify continued needâ past due March 13 2020
Homeowners Assistance Fund is offering up to $50,000 âMass HAF will provide up to $50,000 in financial assistance to eligible homeowners who have missed at least 3 home mortgage payments to help them avoid foreclosure. If a homeowner's application is approved, funds will be provided to a homeownerâs mortgage servicing company (the company that collects their mortgage payments) in order to apply it to the housing loan)â
MASShousing continues to offer up to 50,000 for first time homebuyers in Attleboro, Barnstable, Boston, Brockton, Chelsea, Chicopee, Everett, Fall River, Fitchburg, Framingham, Haverhill, Holyoke, Lawrence, Leominster, Lowell, Lynn, Malden, Methuen, New Bedford, Peabody, Pittsfield, Quincy, Randolph, Revere, Salem, Springfield, Taunton, Westfield and Worcester. For more information and check eligibility :
RAFT Program is offering up to $10,000 âRAFT can cover utilities, moving costs, and overdue rentâ
HOMEBASE through DHCD is offering $20,000 for move in cost, household items for those at risk of homelessness
Family Aid also assist families at risk of homelessness (617) 542-7286
Furniture Information
Masshealth MATCH program is offering up to $5,500 for eligible households. For more information
Rosieâs place 617-442- 9322
My Brothers Keeper (508) 238-4416
Inquire with DTA as well as your health center for referral for furniture may need uhaul to pick up
Family aid also offers 3000 for furniture
Education/ Job training programs:
YEAR UP Average starting annual salary for students is 52k a year. You will learn a new skill, intern at one of their 250 contracted companies and they will assist in helping you land a job (617) 542-1533
City Year Job training for those interested in tech job (617) 927-2500
YMCA training inc âThe 16-week Medical Administrative Assista training program prepares participants for general registration and front desk administrative office support, including basic medical terminology, overview of billing and claims processing, HIPAA and OSHA guidelines, and health insurance overview. At the conclusion of training, participants will take a certification exam to receive their industry recognized Medical Administrative Assistant credential.â Inquire online :
MASSHIRE continues to offer their ESOL , GED/HISET, ADULT DIPLOMA, PRE GED, Literacy Programs
Automatic technician training program Carpentry apprentice program and other programs Inquire at :
JVS Boston offers the following programs: Animal Care Technician Training Automotive Technician Training Bank Career Training Biotechnology Manufacturing Associate Training Program Bridges to College & Careers - Biotechnology Training Carpentry Apprentice Training Certified Nursing Assistant Training Customer Service Training Early Childhood Educator Training Healthcare Cleaning Training Heating, Ventilation, Air Conditioning and Refrigeration (HVAC&R) Training Hotel Training Patient Care Technician Training Substance Addiction Assistant Training Inquire at :
Legal Services Organizations:
GREATER BOSTON LEGAL SERVICES 197 Friend Street, Boston (617) 603-1807 (Housing Law) (617) 603-1700 (Eastern Regional Intake) Services: Eviction defense; defense of tenants after foreclosure; subsidy preservation; tenant rights; plus other non-housing services Website: l
VOLUNTEER LAWYER'S PROJECT (617) 603-1700 (Eastern Region Intake) Services: Legal services - for renters facing eviction. Filing court documents against landlord. Post-foreclosure eviction. Website:
HOMESTART 105 Chauncy Street, Suite 502, Boston (617) 542-0338 (857) 415-1454 (Eviction Prevention Hotline) Services: Housing court assistance and legal support. Payment for back rent. Moving expenses for relocation. Email: Website: l
LAWYERS FOR CIVIL RIGHTS (617) 482-1145 Services: RAFT or Boston Rental Relief Fund application help; help with eviction discrimination or harassment; no individual eviction cases. Website:
Community Organizations:
CITY LIFE/VIDA URBANA 284 Amory Street, Jamaica Plain (617) 934-5006 (English COVID Hotline) (617) 397-3773 (Español LĂnea Directa) (617) 524-3541 Services: Eviction prevention; rent relief; tenant rights; community organization services. Website:
JUSTICE 4 HOUSING Services: Help justice-involved individuals who are denied housing opportunities due to a criminal record secure stable housing. As well as justice-involved and domestic violence housing agency evictions. Facebook: @justice4housing Email: [email protected] Website:
NUESTRA COMMUNIDAD 56 Warren Street, Suite 200, Roxbury (617) 427-3599 Services: Housing resource services; housing counseling; homelessness prevention; special expertise for ages 60+. Website:
PROJECT HOPE 550 Dudley Street, Roxbury (617) 442-1880 (ext. 242 for Housing) Services: Provide housing support services including rehousing and case management to low-income women with children. Also education, employment, and emergency services. Website:
CITY MISSION 185 Columbia Road, Dorchester (617) 742-6830 Services: Limited, one-time grants for back rent; various other non-housing services. Website:
ASSOCIATION OF HAITIAN WOMEN IN BOSTON (AFAB-KAFANM) 330 Fuller Street Dorchester (617) 287-0096 Services: Assist newly arrived Haitian immigrants in applying for public housing benefits and facilitates workshops on housing issues such as tenant rights, home buying, etc. Website:
KENNEDY CENTER 15 Tufts Street, Charlestown (617) 241-8866 ext. 1352 Services: Housing or food emergency services. Application assistance and case management. Email: [email protected]. Website:
CASA MYRNA (617) 521-0126 Services: Provide culturally competent and trauma-informed emergency shelter and critical supportive services for adults, youth and families who are homeless due to domestic violence. Email: Website: m
NEIGHBORHOOD OF AFFORDABLE HOUSING (NOAH) 143 Border Street, Boston (617) 418-8260 Services: Financial Assistance - Emergency Housing Assistance Program. Bilingual (English/Spanish) rental housing counseling and. Website:
ACTION FOR BOSTON COMMUNITY DEVELOPMENT 178 Tremont Street, Boston (Numerous locations) (617) 348-6329 Services: Rent assistance; housing counseling. Email: Website:
No person is all bad , hard times do not discminate nor are they schedule, we all deserve to live comfortably and be happy. I hope this helps. Heal, Be confident & stay consistent. Wishing you all the best
ITS NOT LETTING ME INCLUDE LINK I APOLOGIZE
submitted by Emmie89509 to boston [link] [comments]
City of boston Rental Relief Program is offering $15000 grant âThe Rental Relief Fund provides up to $15,000 in rental and utility assistance for income eligible households for up to 12 months. Eligible households can receive assistance for both back rent and rent going forward. Households receiving assistance for future rent will need to recertify income every 3 months to verify continued needâ past due March 13 2020
Homeowners Assistance Fund is offering up to $50,000 âMass HAF will provide up to $50,000 in financial assistance to eligible homeowners who have missed at least 3 home mortgage payments to help them avoid foreclosure. If a homeowner's application is approved, funds will be provided to a homeownerâs mortgage servicing company (the company that collects their mortgage payments) in order to apply it to the housing loan)â
MASShousing continues to offer up to 50,000 for first time homebuyers in Attleboro, Barnstable, Boston, Brockton, Chelsea, Chicopee, Everett, Fall River, Fitchburg, Framingham, Haverhill, Holyoke, Lawrence, Leominster, Lowell, Lynn, Malden, Methuen, New Bedford, Peabody, Pittsfield, Quincy, Randolph, Revere, Salem, Springfield, Taunton, Westfield and Worcester. For more information and check eligibility :
RAFT Program is offering up to $10,000 âRAFT can cover utilities, moving costs, and overdue rentâ
HOMEBASE through DHCD is offering $20,000 for move in cost, household items for those at risk of homelessness
Family Aid also assist families at risk of homelessness (617) 542-7286
Furniture Information
Masshealth MATCH program is offering up to $5,500 for eligible households. For more information
Rosieâs place 617-442- 9322
My Brothers Keeper (508) 238-4416
Inquire with DTA as well as your health center for referral for furniture may need uhaul to pick up
Family aid also offers 3000 for furniture
Education/ Job training programs:
YEAR UP Average starting annual salary for students is 52k a year. You will learn a new skill, intern at one of their 250 contracted companies and they will assist in helping you land a job (617) 542-1533
City Year Job training for those interested in tech job (617) 927-2500
YMCA training inc âThe 16-week Medical Administrative Assista training program prepares participants for general registration and front desk administrative office support, including basic medical terminology, overview of billing and claims processing, HIPAA and OSHA guidelines, and health insurance overview. At the conclusion of training, participants will take a certification exam to receive their industry recognized Medical Administrative Assistant credential.â Inquire online :
MASSHIRE continues to offer their ESOL , GED/HISET, ADULT DIPLOMA, PRE GED, Literacy Programs
Automatic technician training program Carpentry apprentice program and other programs Inquire at :
JVS Boston offers the following programs: Animal Care Technician Training Automotive Technician Training Bank Career Training Biotechnology Manufacturing Associate Training Program Bridges to College & Careers - Biotechnology Training Carpentry Apprentice Training Certified Nursing Assistant Training Customer Service Training Early Childhood Educator Training Healthcare Cleaning Training Heating, Ventilation, Air Conditioning and Refrigeration (HVAC&R) Training Hotel Training Patient Care Technician Training Substance Addiction Assistant Training Inquire at :
Legal Services Organizations:
GREATER BOSTON LEGAL SERVICES 197 Friend Street, Boston (617) 603-1807 (Housing Law) (617) 603-1700 (Eastern Regional Intake) Services: Eviction defense; defense of tenants after foreclosure; subsidy preservation; tenant rights; plus other non-housing services Website: l
VOLUNTEER LAWYER'S PROJECT (617) 603-1700 (Eastern Region Intake) Services: Legal services - for renters facing eviction. Filing court documents against landlord. Post-foreclosure eviction. Website:
HOMESTART 105 Chauncy Street, Suite 502, Boston (617) 542-0338 (857) 415-1454 (Eviction Prevention Hotline) Services: Housing court assistance and legal support. Payment for back rent. Moving expenses for relocation. Email: Website: l
LAWYERS FOR CIVIL RIGHTS (617) 482-1145 Services: RAFT or Boston Rental Relief Fund application help; help with eviction discrimination or harassment; no individual eviction cases. Website:
Community Organizations:
CITY LIFE/VIDA URBANA 284 Amory Street, Jamaica Plain (617) 934-5006 (English COVID Hotline) (617) 397-3773 (Español LĂnea Directa) (617) 524-3541 Services: Eviction prevention; rent relief; tenant rights; community organization services. Website:
JUSTICE 4 HOUSING Services: Help justice-involved individuals who are denied housing opportunities due to a criminal record secure stable housing. As well as justice-involved and domestic violence housing agency evictions. Facebook: @justice4housing Email: [email protected] Website:
NUESTRA COMMUNIDAD 56 Warren Street, Suite 200, Roxbury (617) 427-3599 Services: Housing resource services; housing counseling; homelessness prevention; special expertise for ages 60+. Website:
PROJECT HOPE 550 Dudley Street, Roxbury (617) 442-1880 (ext. 242 for Housing) Services: Provide housing support services including rehousing and case management to low-income women with children. Also education, employment, and emergency services. Website:
CITY MISSION 185 Columbia Road, Dorchester (617) 742-6830 Services: Limited, one-time grants for back rent; various other non-housing services. Website:
ASSOCIATION OF HAITIAN WOMEN IN BOSTON (AFAB-KAFANM) 330 Fuller Street Dorchester (617) 287-0096 Services: Assist newly arrived Haitian immigrants in applying for public housing benefits and facilitates workshops on housing issues such as tenant rights, home buying, etc. Website:
KENNEDY CENTER 15 Tufts Street, Charlestown (617) 241-8866 ext. 1352 Services: Housing or food emergency services. Application assistance and case management. Email: [email protected]. Website:
CASA MYRNA (617) 521-0126 Services: Provide culturally competent and trauma-informed emergency shelter and critical supportive services for adults, youth and families who are homeless due to domestic violence. Email: Website: m
NEIGHBORHOOD OF AFFORDABLE HOUSING (NOAH) 143 Border Street, Boston (617) 418-8260 Services: Financial Assistance - Emergency Housing Assistance Program. Bilingual (English/Spanish) rental housing counseling and. Website:
ACTION FOR BOSTON COMMUNITY DEVELOPMENT 178 Tremont Street, Boston (Numerous locations) (617) 348-6329 Services: Rent assistance; housing counseling. Email: Website:
No person is all bad , hard times do not discminate nor are they schedule, we all deserve to live comfortably and be happy. I hope this helps. Heal, Be confident & stay consistent. Wishing you all the best
ITS NOT LETTING ME INCLUDE LINK I APOLOGIZE
2023.06.01 20:08 FelixRN Help, we are at our wits end!
Hello, I have a 15 week old aussiedoodle and we have had her for 6 weeks. My wife and I are her 3rd owners, 1st was breeder(who is a well known breeder in my area), 2nd was a older family with older and smaller dogs who dispised the puppy and began to act out of their norm with the new puppy. So the breeder removed the dog to us and she is adorable, very smart, but incredibly difficult to train. We both are Home Health nurses and go home regularly between 8 and 3 when for potty breaks. She continues to potty and fights her crate after we introduced it to her 6 weeks ago. Originally with the older couple they let her free roam in and out of their fenced and gated home. I do not have that luxury at this time and it has been difficult potty breaking the dog from peeing only outside, which is expected giving she learned to potty outside very early, our issue is that she will walk outside for 30-40 mins not use the potty and then we will take her in to go back to work or bc she will not potty and then she will poo/pee on her crate or random areas throughout the house.I have had several dogs in my life that I have trained husky, Rottweiler and Yorkie. Our current dog is by far more difficult to get her attention, leash train and potty train. I feel like we are starting fresh with every single training even if it's multiple times a day. Can anyone please help us with our sanity and give some guidance, we take criticism well. Current routine 630-7 am wake up and potty 730 breakfast 8 short outside walk 15 mins 830 In her crate until 11-12 1st break and lunch for puppy 3-4 out of crate for 2nd 30 min outside time 6pm dinner 630 food put away and 20 min outside walk 4-9 pm open water time 9 pm water is put up and she has another 20 min outside potty break/walk 11 final walk and put into our bedroom crate for the evening Between 11-6 am she will bark to go out and potty*(rare)
2023.06.01 20:08 FelixRN Help, we are at our wits end!
Hello, I have a 15 week old aussiedoodle and we have had her for 6 weeks. My wife and I are her 3rd owners, 1st was breeder(who is a well known breeder in my area), 2nd was a older family with older and smaller dogs who dispised the puppy and began to act out of their norm with the new puppy. So the breeder removed the dog to us and she is adorable, very smart, but incredibly difficult to train. We both are Home Health nurses and go home regularly between 8 and 3 when for potty breaks. She continues to potty and fights her crate after we introduced it to her 6 weeks ago. Originally with the older couple they let her free roam in and out of their fenced and gated home. I do not have that luxury at this time and it has been difficult potty breaking the dog from peeing only outside, which is expected giving she learned to potty outside very early, our issue is that she will walk outside for 30-40 mins not use the potty and then we will take her in to go back to work or bc she will not potty and then she will poo/pee on her crate or random areas throughout the house.I have had several dogs in my life that I have trained husky, Rottweiler and Yorkie. Our current dog is by far more difficult to get her attention, leash train and potty train. I feel like we are starting fresh with every single training even if it's multiple times a day. Can anyone please help us with our sanity and give some guidance, we take criticism well. Current routine 630-7 am wake up and potty 730 breakfast 8 short outside walk 15 mins 830 In her crate until 11-12 1st break and lunch for puppy 3-4 out of crate for 2nd 30 min outside time 6pm dinner 630 food put away and 20 min outside walk 4-9 pm open water time 9 pm water is put up and she has another 20 min outside potty break/walk 11 final walk and put into our bedroom crate for the evening Between 11-6 am she will bark to go out and potty*(rare)
2023.06.01 19:32 granolagrunk I hate them. So much regret.
My entire family is a bunch of drug addict drug dealers. Primarily meth, but theyâre diagnosed as poly substance abuse disorder. I regret trying to save my mom from abuse so much. She had blood clots, so adrenaline rushes from verbal abuse were literally life threatening. I didnt want her to die from a heart attack getting screamed at, stuck in a hoarder house, sitting in a diaper of her own filth, getting eaten by roaches, fleas and bedbugs.
So I became her home healthcare aid. I cleaned that filthy hoard even though my work would be undone in 24 hours. I mean scrubbing rancid sick dog shit and piss, rotting meat, diapers. I also worked another job in food delivery. I did this while fighting with my school because I didnât meet satisfactory academic requirements and they took away my student loans and scholarship. I ended up graduating with honors.
The pandemic made things so much worse. Everything was starting to look up until then. My evil dad, the owner of the house, the one I was afraid would kill her because he screamed at her enough to dislodge a blood clot, who broke glass on the ground she could barely walk over, finally had to go to a nursing home. I thought it was over. Nope.
My piece of shit EVIL brother decided he deserved to inherit the house. He got mom readdicted to meth, even though he knew it would push her to death. It was intentional. He turned the house into a trap house. I had to evict a bunch of people because they started a fire. They threatened my and my husbands safety. I had to get a gun and live in fear. I had to move my mom to an apartment I secured for her.
She fucking told him where she lived, invited him over, and did meth. She nearly died. I tried to get my community to hold him accountable, but everyone blames her, even though she is elderly, disabled, has DEMENTIA and a stroke.
I sacrificed so much for her. I delayed graduation so I could have the time to be her aid. Now the market has turned against people with a BS in computer science. I cannot get a job. It really is that bad. If I had graduated earlier, I would be fine. If I hadnât been dealing with this shit, I could have gotten an internship, and had a fighting chance.
They are all so evil. Do not sacrifice a day for them. Not a single tear. I wish I could go back and tell my child self to scream from the rooftops, to run away as fast as possible. Do anything to get away from addicts. You are the sacrifice they are always willing to make.
submitted by granolagrunk to naranon [link] [comments]
So I became her home healthcare aid. I cleaned that filthy hoard even though my work would be undone in 24 hours. I mean scrubbing rancid sick dog shit and piss, rotting meat, diapers. I also worked another job in food delivery. I did this while fighting with my school because I didnât meet satisfactory academic requirements and they took away my student loans and scholarship. I ended up graduating with honors.
The pandemic made things so much worse. Everything was starting to look up until then. My evil dad, the owner of the house, the one I was afraid would kill her because he screamed at her enough to dislodge a blood clot, who broke glass on the ground she could barely walk over, finally had to go to a nursing home. I thought it was over. Nope.
My piece of shit EVIL brother decided he deserved to inherit the house. He got mom readdicted to meth, even though he knew it would push her to death. It was intentional. He turned the house into a trap house. I had to evict a bunch of people because they started a fire. They threatened my and my husbands safety. I had to get a gun and live in fear. I had to move my mom to an apartment I secured for her.
She fucking told him where she lived, invited him over, and did meth. She nearly died. I tried to get my community to hold him accountable, but everyone blames her, even though she is elderly, disabled, has DEMENTIA and a stroke.
I sacrificed so much for her. I delayed graduation so I could have the time to be her aid. Now the market has turned against people with a BS in computer science. I cannot get a job. It really is that bad. If I had graduated earlier, I would be fine. If I hadnât been dealing with this shit, I could have gotten an internship, and had a fighting chance.
They are all so evil. Do not sacrifice a day for them. Not a single tear. I wish I could go back and tell my child self to scream from the rooftops, to run away as fast as possible. Do anything to get away from addicts. You are the sacrifice they are always willing to make.
2023.06.01 19:30 Advanced-Formal-4422 Me (30M) and Fiances (30F) Predicament need some input
Well Hello Reddit :) In a bit of a predicament as you can tell from the title...
Funny thought (and first thought) was to come here and write about it...
I am a 30 year old male that has dated a 30 year old female now for 5 years. We first met in the elementary school and immediately liked one another. At that time we became official! This was 6th grade however... So our new found love lead to hugs and a first kiss.
She ended up moving schools and we did not see each other for 12 years... I had recently returned home after working in another state... I was 24 years of age back home and we ran into one another out at a bar, snagged the number, and started dating :) MISSION ACCOMPLISHED?
Over the next 4 years we had some great times together, moved to a new city, returned home, got a dog... All the normal signs of growth in a relationship. I decided after some internal thinking, ("What am I waiting for after 5 years of dating?!") to get get engaged.
I flew to NYC and met an old jewelry friend, purchased an engagement ring, flew home, and two months later proposed to my Girlfriend on my birthday at a special restaurant that has been as second home to many of our best dates.
My Fiancé left her retail jobs and decided to purse a career in Nursing 6 months before I got on a knee... Part of our process to get through her new workload and school commitments was I would handle housing, car, and most bills, while she worked to finish her two year nursing program. She has kept a PT job a couple days a week to have some income flow to handle her insurance, and for items she wanted to splurge on. I make good money to handle this, but taking care of two and maintaining a social life was still a no doubt financial stressor on me.
The first two semesters of nursing school went by with its challenges, but she had passed and after this week has finished her second semester. Two more to go! All according to plan? Well...
She has recently been spending a lot of time going out, with her nursing girlfriends and classmates. I have met a few of them, they are a bit younger, but ok... No issues there. She was however after every time going out coming home at an extremely late hour. I had asked, "Ok no problem, have fun! But I think its time for you to start coming back at a more reasonable hour, lets say midnight?" (Instead of 4am, then she's couch ridden the entire next day beating a hangover)
Her first Lie...
On one of her nights out she had said she would be with a group of nursing girls, well It seemed odd to me after she returned home that night, while I was in bed, she was texting on the floor beside the bed at 1 am... That seemed odd so late at night... I did something I have never done, and I checked her phone in the am and she had sent a kissing heart emoji to her male nursing teacher. So it was a date.... Clearly.
We ended up separating for two weeks, talking about what went wrong, and if we were going to actively fix this we both needed to work on some things. FAIR. I don't excuse her for doing that in the slightest, but she had some concerns with me I wish she would've brought to the table instead of seeking another mans attention!
The last month everything we had talked about we would work on since her date she did not take seriously... She was Lazy, acting spoiled, did not take care of the items we talked about, and almost seemed to self sabotage daily our happiness. It would be a good date out, no issues, then as we get home she would say something like "I still just don't know about us, we need therapy" Or something along those lines. Lot of highs and then hit with some lows... It has been difficult. I have tried to see the positive as much as I could from each day together, but we are struggling clearly.
Last week I texted her on Wednesday "lets have some fun tonight, not think too much, get a nicely made cocktail or two then get some sushi"
We did the date, went home, and as I walked outside to take the trash out she was on the phone with a deleted number.. It was the guy she went on a date again, her teacher... She said it was her friends office line, so I texted her friend... NOPE not her office line.
This time I was FURIOUS... Kicked her out immediately, said a couple nasty things and she left. She has been sleeping on friends couches now the last week... We are still separated.
I wanted to say the first time she went out with him, she seemed nonchalant, carless, and as I previously said, lazy in her attempt to make this work... This time she is BEGGING to come back, and to this time take it seriously what we said we would work on...and that she will show me.
We did have 4 amazing years together, I did see her as a wife and mother to our one day children (why I pursued an engagement with her). I don't believe she ever cheated before, never have had a urge to check her phone, but clearly we have a major issue here.
We are still separated... But she is asking me to know if she will be given another chance to once again prove that this was just a mishap. I am hurt, confused and exhausted.. Part of me wants to give it a go, part of me thinks that would be entirely idiotic to do so... Regardless of any relationships issue, there cant be another man/woman. PERIOD. How can you fix something when your partner seems to have one foot in? BUT now realizing the seriousness of this all coming to an end, she begs for her last opportunity.
I guess I wondered if any of you out there have been through something similar...
submitted by Advanced-Formal-4422 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
Funny thought (and first thought) was to come here and write about it...
I am a 30 year old male that has dated a 30 year old female now for 5 years. We first met in the elementary school and immediately liked one another. At that time we became official! This was 6th grade however... So our new found love lead to hugs and a first kiss.
She ended up moving schools and we did not see each other for 12 years... I had recently returned home after working in another state... I was 24 years of age back home and we ran into one another out at a bar, snagged the number, and started dating :) MISSION ACCOMPLISHED?
Over the next 4 years we had some great times together, moved to a new city, returned home, got a dog... All the normal signs of growth in a relationship. I decided after some internal thinking, ("What am I waiting for after 5 years of dating?!") to get get engaged.
I flew to NYC and met an old jewelry friend, purchased an engagement ring, flew home, and two months later proposed to my Girlfriend on my birthday at a special restaurant that has been as second home to many of our best dates.
My Fiancé left her retail jobs and decided to purse a career in Nursing 6 months before I got on a knee... Part of our process to get through her new workload and school commitments was I would handle housing, car, and most bills, while she worked to finish her two year nursing program. She has kept a PT job a couple days a week to have some income flow to handle her insurance, and for items she wanted to splurge on. I make good money to handle this, but taking care of two and maintaining a social life was still a no doubt financial stressor on me.
The first two semesters of nursing school went by with its challenges, but she had passed and after this week has finished her second semester. Two more to go! All according to plan? Well...
She has recently been spending a lot of time going out, with her nursing girlfriends and classmates. I have met a few of them, they are a bit younger, but ok... No issues there. She was however after every time going out coming home at an extremely late hour. I had asked, "Ok no problem, have fun! But I think its time for you to start coming back at a more reasonable hour, lets say midnight?" (Instead of 4am, then she's couch ridden the entire next day beating a hangover)
Her first Lie...
On one of her nights out she had said she would be with a group of nursing girls, well It seemed odd to me after she returned home that night, while I was in bed, she was texting on the floor beside the bed at 1 am... That seemed odd so late at night... I did something I have never done, and I checked her phone in the am and she had sent a kissing heart emoji to her male nursing teacher. So it was a date.... Clearly.
We ended up separating for two weeks, talking about what went wrong, and if we were going to actively fix this we both needed to work on some things. FAIR. I don't excuse her for doing that in the slightest, but she had some concerns with me I wish she would've brought to the table instead of seeking another mans attention!
The last month everything we had talked about we would work on since her date she did not take seriously... She was Lazy, acting spoiled, did not take care of the items we talked about, and almost seemed to self sabotage daily our happiness. It would be a good date out, no issues, then as we get home she would say something like "I still just don't know about us, we need therapy" Or something along those lines. Lot of highs and then hit with some lows... It has been difficult. I have tried to see the positive as much as I could from each day together, but we are struggling clearly.
Last week I texted her on Wednesday "lets have some fun tonight, not think too much, get a nicely made cocktail or two then get some sushi"
We did the date, went home, and as I walked outside to take the trash out she was on the phone with a deleted number.. It was the guy she went on a date again, her teacher... She said it was her friends office line, so I texted her friend... NOPE not her office line.
This time I was FURIOUS... Kicked her out immediately, said a couple nasty things and she left. She has been sleeping on friends couches now the last week... We are still separated.
I wanted to say the first time she went out with him, she seemed nonchalant, carless, and as I previously said, lazy in her attempt to make this work... This time she is BEGGING to come back, and to this time take it seriously what we said we would work on...and that she will show me.
We did have 4 amazing years together, I did see her as a wife and mother to our one day children (why I pursued an engagement with her). I don't believe she ever cheated before, never have had a urge to check her phone, but clearly we have a major issue here.
We are still separated... But she is asking me to know if she will be given another chance to once again prove that this was just a mishap. I am hurt, confused and exhausted.. Part of me wants to give it a go, part of me thinks that would be entirely idiotic to do so... Regardless of any relationships issue, there cant be another man/woman. PERIOD. How can you fix something when your partner seems to have one foot in? BUT now realizing the seriousness of this all coming to an end, she begs for her last opportunity.
I guess I wondered if any of you out there have been through something similar...
2023.06.01 19:30 fizzy-logic Can social workers help someone who can't get out to get their groceries, get to doctors, etc?
I don't really know where to go with this question, but we're caretakers who've taken a hell of a beating from a very difficult, nasty parent for three years, and are getting tempted to walk away.
If an elderly person is able to just barely manage around the house while living alone, but can't drive and isn't together enough cognitively to coordinate cabs, grocery deliveries, get to or coordinate doctor appointments, etc., will social workers (or some other agency) arrange this for her? Or will they step in and get them remanded to a care facility? Will they do it in a quick manner?
We've been helping my MIL for almost three years now. She's very frail and falls often, and has moderate dementia. She gets off-the-charts paranoid and nasty, hindering our ability to help her. And when she's not being nasty, she'll sometimes just be confused or have delusions or hallucinations. She does have times when she's fairly clear too (though they're always an underlying layer of confusion, though this isn't always clear to healthcare workers asking her questions because they don't know what she's telling them is wrong. She does always know her name, dob, the year, who her doctor is, etc.) She was always a difficult person (so much so no other of her children or adult grandchildren have anything to do with her - as in she only knows where one of them lives, the others are full no-contact).
She refuses to go to assisted living, and has refused allowing any in-home help whatsoever besides us. We are about done being her caregivers. She's in a rehab center right now where they are working on helping her get around better. Long story on how we got her there, but we are hoping to transition her to an assisted living facility from there. But she is not deemed incompetent, and I don't think there will be a way to get her to agree to go willingly. It was utter unholy hell just getting her to agree to rehab.
So, I think I should tell the rehab center's social worker that their care plan needs to include options for what they can do to help her if she returns home with no caretakers to make sure she gets food and medicine and to doctor appointments. We wouldn't really stop helping her if they don't have any options to help someone in that situation, but we need to know if they do can do it, or if the fact of her no longer having family help would prompt them to do what's needed to get her placed in a care home against her will. We may also want to tell the MIL we'll no longer help her just to make her realize she does need assisted living. But she's in such denial about what she can and can't do, and that the other family members who won't even talk to her will swoop in and take care of her, that she still may refuse to go to a facility. I just don't know what to do, but we can't keep doing this with her anymore.
When the social workers/nurses etc talk about her being able to live alone, they always focus on how she gets around the house by herself (which is just barely). They never take into account that she can't do anything for herself that involves anything outside the house (getting groceries, making doctor appointments, figuring out how to get there, remembering to go, understanding what the doctor told you, etc). And it sure seems to me you can't live alone if you can't do those things, if there's no one to help you.
Which is why it seems maybe we should tell them to make a plan that doesn't involve us and see what they come up with. Is there any hope they can actually help?
submitted by fizzy-logic to caregivers [link] [comments]
If an elderly person is able to just barely manage around the house while living alone, but can't drive and isn't together enough cognitively to coordinate cabs, grocery deliveries, get to or coordinate doctor appointments, etc., will social workers (or some other agency) arrange this for her? Or will they step in and get them remanded to a care facility? Will they do it in a quick manner?
We've been helping my MIL for almost three years now. She's very frail and falls often, and has moderate dementia. She gets off-the-charts paranoid and nasty, hindering our ability to help her. And when she's not being nasty, she'll sometimes just be confused or have delusions or hallucinations. She does have times when she's fairly clear too (though they're always an underlying layer of confusion, though this isn't always clear to healthcare workers asking her questions because they don't know what she's telling them is wrong. She does always know her name, dob, the year, who her doctor is, etc.) She was always a difficult person (so much so no other of her children or adult grandchildren have anything to do with her - as in she only knows where one of them lives, the others are full no-contact).
She refuses to go to assisted living, and has refused allowing any in-home help whatsoever besides us. We are about done being her caregivers. She's in a rehab center right now where they are working on helping her get around better. Long story on how we got her there, but we are hoping to transition her to an assisted living facility from there. But she is not deemed incompetent, and I don't think there will be a way to get her to agree to go willingly. It was utter unholy hell just getting her to agree to rehab.
So, I think I should tell the rehab center's social worker that their care plan needs to include options for what they can do to help her if she returns home with no caretakers to make sure she gets food and medicine and to doctor appointments. We wouldn't really stop helping her if they don't have any options to help someone in that situation, but we need to know if they do can do it, or if the fact of her no longer having family help would prompt them to do what's needed to get her placed in a care home against her will. We may also want to tell the MIL we'll no longer help her just to make her realize she does need assisted living. But she's in such denial about what she can and can't do, and that the other family members who won't even talk to her will swoop in and take care of her, that she still may refuse to go to a facility. I just don't know what to do, but we can't keep doing this with her anymore.
When the social workers/nurses etc talk about her being able to live alone, they always focus on how she gets around the house by herself (which is just barely). They never take into account that she can't do anything for herself that involves anything outside the house (getting groceries, making doctor appointments, figuring out how to get there, remembering to go, understanding what the doctor told you, etc). And it sure seems to me you can't live alone if you can't do those things, if there's no one to help you.
Which is why it seems maybe we should tell them to make a plan that doesn't involve us and see what they come up with. Is there any hope they can actually help?
2023.06.01 18:41 Skye-Hi A rant because I donât know anyone who has experienced what I have
This might be a little lengthy as I have ADHD and tend to go on tangent⊠I do not get along with my mother very well.
From birth to 10yrs old, me and my mother lived with my grandparents. My mother was young when she had me, 22. She was never around much and I have no memories of her looking after me, that was always my grandparents. When she was home, it was late and I was supposed to be sleeping but I couldnât as she was yelling at my grandparents. Looking back probably about her money issues but I canât be sure. We moved out when I was 10 years old. Thatâs when things started to go wrong. She works as a mental health nurse, 9-5/6 and makes a good wage. It was my job to look after the house. Iâd clean, cook and go to school. However, she was angry at me all the time. no matter what I did or how hard I tried, something was always wrong. Now, as I mentioned⊠I have ADHD. I was diagnosed at 7. But, my mother refuses to accept this diagnosis and allow me medication and care. Given that I have ADHD I am forgetful. Incredibly. So, if I ever forgot a chore I didnât get let off for it despite it not being intentional. My mother would scream at me. âYouâre a stupid girl.â âYouâre useless.â âYou canât do anything right.â âWhy can you do simple things right?â âWhy canât you be like everyone else?â She would grab me and drag me out the house, leaving those red marks that fade away after a few hours. She did this over even something as minor as crumbs being on the counter. My granddad would give me pocket money as a child. My mother knew this and would constantly ask me for money for things from food to got out with her friends. I couldnât say no. If I did sheâd yell.
As I got older she stopped laying her hands on me, but the emotional abuse never stopped. We moved again and the house chores continued to be my responsibility.
At this point, I was in secondary school. I developed anxiety and experienced frequent panic attacks. When the school phoned my mother about them, that got me in deep trouble. I wasnât allowed to see or talk to my friends for weeks. Iâll never forget what she said⊠âHow do you think this makes me look? How will I look at work if my daughter is having fucking panic attacks? Youâre so selfish. So pathetic.â
She had made friends where we lived. She was going out more. Buying expensive clothes (sheâs always has a taste for what she canât afford). Using my money more. And the fridge got emptier and emptier. I started having to contribute to the bills.
When I turned 16 I got a job at the local pub. She got me the job. I didnât want one, but she threatened me if I didnât, so I did. Luckily, I ended up enjoying it. I was one of the youngest there and I found friendship with the older girls. This is when I found out my situation with my mother isnât normal. I shouldnât have been responsible for the house. The fridge shouldnât have been so empty. She shouldnât have been leaving me for weekends alone with nothing to eat. I shouldnât have been contributing to bills.
However, I was too scared. Too scared to change. To fight her. So, it continued. 16-18 were the worst years of my life. I worked 30-60 hours on top of 42 hours in school every week while trying to find time to maintain the house. I could never do it right. She got worse. Yelling at me almost every time I saw her.
This has all taken a major toll on me. I moved back in with my grandparents a couple weeks after my 18th. I got fired after a mental breakdown. I got diagnosed with depression and anxiety and me and my GP are working on an ADHD diagnosis.
But sheâs still there. Sheâs always texting me about how sad she is Iâm gone. Sheâs trying to get me/ buy me back. I donât think I can forgive her. I hate me self and Iâm so depressed because I believe all the negative things she has said about me. My psychology teacher said her treatment of me is textbook emotional and financial abuse. What do you think?
submitted by Skye-Hi to emotionalabuse [link] [comments]
From birth to 10yrs old, me and my mother lived with my grandparents. My mother was young when she had me, 22. She was never around much and I have no memories of her looking after me, that was always my grandparents. When she was home, it was late and I was supposed to be sleeping but I couldnât as she was yelling at my grandparents. Looking back probably about her money issues but I canât be sure. We moved out when I was 10 years old. Thatâs when things started to go wrong. She works as a mental health nurse, 9-5/6 and makes a good wage. It was my job to look after the house. Iâd clean, cook and go to school. However, she was angry at me all the time. no matter what I did or how hard I tried, something was always wrong. Now, as I mentioned⊠I have ADHD. I was diagnosed at 7. But, my mother refuses to accept this diagnosis and allow me medication and care. Given that I have ADHD I am forgetful. Incredibly. So, if I ever forgot a chore I didnât get let off for it despite it not being intentional. My mother would scream at me. âYouâre a stupid girl.â âYouâre useless.â âYou canât do anything right.â âWhy can you do simple things right?â âWhy canât you be like everyone else?â She would grab me and drag me out the house, leaving those red marks that fade away after a few hours. She did this over even something as minor as crumbs being on the counter. My granddad would give me pocket money as a child. My mother knew this and would constantly ask me for money for things from food to got out with her friends. I couldnât say no. If I did sheâd yell.
As I got older she stopped laying her hands on me, but the emotional abuse never stopped. We moved again and the house chores continued to be my responsibility.
At this point, I was in secondary school. I developed anxiety and experienced frequent panic attacks. When the school phoned my mother about them, that got me in deep trouble. I wasnât allowed to see or talk to my friends for weeks. Iâll never forget what she said⊠âHow do you think this makes me look? How will I look at work if my daughter is having fucking panic attacks? Youâre so selfish. So pathetic.â
She had made friends where we lived. She was going out more. Buying expensive clothes (sheâs always has a taste for what she canât afford). Using my money more. And the fridge got emptier and emptier. I started having to contribute to the bills.
When I turned 16 I got a job at the local pub. She got me the job. I didnât want one, but she threatened me if I didnât, so I did. Luckily, I ended up enjoying it. I was one of the youngest there and I found friendship with the older girls. This is when I found out my situation with my mother isnât normal. I shouldnât have been responsible for the house. The fridge shouldnât have been so empty. She shouldnât have been leaving me for weekends alone with nothing to eat. I shouldnât have been contributing to bills.
However, I was too scared. Too scared to change. To fight her. So, it continued. 16-18 were the worst years of my life. I worked 30-60 hours on top of 42 hours in school every week while trying to find time to maintain the house. I could never do it right. She got worse. Yelling at me almost every time I saw her.
This has all taken a major toll on me. I moved back in with my grandparents a couple weeks after my 18th. I got fired after a mental breakdown. I got diagnosed with depression and anxiety and me and my GP are working on an ADHD diagnosis.
But sheâs still there. Sheâs always texting me about how sad she is Iâm gone. Sheâs trying to get me/ buy me back. I donât think I can forgive her. I hate me self and Iâm so depressed because I believe all the negative things she has said about me. My psychology teacher said her treatment of me is textbook emotional and financial abuse. What do you think?
2023.06.01 18:37 dysteach-MT How do you handle the process of losing your independence?
Hi all, fairly new to Reddit, so please let me know if this is the right place to post. Warning- pretty long.
I was diagnosed with MS in 2012 when I was 38. I had weird vision issues, it felt like one eye wasnât coordinating with the other. I could look at my classroom and see the students, but their faces were blurry. I couldnât drive at night because of light tracers. Went through the normal ophthalmology channels and was referred to a neurologic ophthalmologist. He did a MRI just to be safe because there were no signs of optic neuritis. After my very first MRI, the nurse asked if this was my first, and said the doctor would call me the next day. I told her my doctor was leaving for a month and he said heâd follow up with me when he got back. The nurse said no, he would call me the next day. Surprise! You have MS and arenât having acid flashbacks from the one time you took it at age 18.
Luckily, I was living in an amazing state with an impressive University medical center. My neurologist taught at the U and going to an appointment was like attending a class. He whipped out a sharpie and starting making amazing flow charts on the paper covering the exam table. He gave it to me at the end. Since the MRI showed active lesions, I took a super high dose of steroids. In the following 5 years, MRIs showed no new lesions, so I never started any medication. My brain developed new pathways and my vision cleared up.
In 2017, I decided to move home to Montana. After the fun experience of establishing care, I was given an absolutely wonderful neurologist in my large and growing city. He wasnât an MS specialist, but there are only 2 in our state. At this point, I didnât think I had MS since no new lesions in 5 years. So, I got an MRI here, and low and behold, new lesions. (Part of the reason is the MRI machine here is newer with better quality.) I was started on Copaxone. About 4 months after starting, I had a relapse and lost some mild functioning in my left hand. In addition, I started having problems with my vision again- same issue as before. Had a follow up MRI showing no new lesions. I was also under a ton of stress during that time. Iâve now figured out that when I get stressed, my brain âforgetsâ the new neural pathway and reverts to the old broken pathway.
So, I was struggling with high stress from my job and extreme exhaustion. He sent me for a sleep study and I was diagnosed with apnea and started using a C-Pap. No change on the exhaustion. They started me on Modafinil and it was a game changer. Over the next 2 years, I lost a significant amount of weight (in a healthy way). My next sleep study showed no apnea at all (yay!) but my oxygen levels dropped significantly when I slept. So now, Iâm on oxygen when I sleep. My sleep doctor did some blood tests that showed my iron levels were low but my ferritin test was high, so I couldnât take any supplements.
Then, my neurologist, who I absolutely adore, explained that the entire neurology department (doctors only) quit due to the horrible administration. I had access to a PA over the next year. Just to be clear, there are two MS specialists in my state- the one 2 hours away was not accepting any new patients and the one 3 hours away had a 2 year wait. I live in the fastest growing city in the US, and itâs a college town. The hospital here is very large and serves all the rural communities. Luckily, a new health clinic extension is opening and Iâm hoping the competition will bring positive changes. But, new clinic wonât have a neurologist for at least another year.
In the meantime, my cognitive and executive functioning have fallen off of a cliff. My short term memory is the same as a goldfish. My exhaustion is at an all time high and Modafinil assistance has plateaued. I quit my job and now am doing private tutoring- but I can usually only handle 4 hours a day. I can still tutor because I have been doing the same program for over 20 years, but learning something new is almost impossible. Perfect example of executive functioning issues: I went over to help a friend learn how to can and make jam. No problem! Then I go to pack up my stuff and I canât figure out how to do it. It usually takes me 3 or 4 tries to leave the house, even if I have tried to set out what I need the night before. I have a waitlist of private clients needing help, but Iâve become so flaky with cancelling sessions because I never know when I will hit a brick wall, so I donât want to start with any new clients.
Then, I get a call scheduling me with a new neurologist to establish care. Yay!!! And I find out that he is a neurology generalist, and of course, 1 neurologist to cover a large population. I like the new neurologist, but can tell he was stressed and overworked. I had the hard conversation about going on a partial disability. I am also having some cardiac issues that also cause fatigue. And surprise- here is another lesion that they missed on my last MRI a year ago. I asked how to start the disability process, and the doctor said the hospital used to have a social worker to help but not any more.
Now, Iâm scheduled for a follow up MRI and neuropsych evaluation. I had to have an internal heart monitor installed. A new cardiologist ordered genetic testing, and that came back with an âunknown markerâ. Iâm also having problems with my joints hurting and popping out of place (this is also congenital- my joints dislocate super easy). I am depressed over not being able to afford to live. I am overwhelmed with trying to figure out public assistance here. The local Human Rights non profit has helped me apply for SNAP and emergency rental assistance, and I found someone at our low income clinic to help with disability paperwork today, but she said I will be denied and it will be a long process.
I canât do the paperwork on my own. I did find a counselor and have an appointment next week. I feel like I am drowning and am grieving losing my independence. The worst part is that my MS is invisible. I have no lesions on my spine, and one optic nerve is slightly larger than the other, but healed. My left hand is a little slow, but only I notice. I grew up in a family (and state culture!) that you pull yourself up by your bootstraps and donât ask for help. People canât see that Iâm struggling. Iâve been accused of being high when I repeat a conversation or have a hard time coming up with a word. My fabulous brother accused me of making it all up to be a âfreeloaderâ that is too lazy to work. There are no MS support groups here. Parkinsonâs & Huntingtonâs have multiple groups. Even attending an MS group is difficult because I donât have mobility problems and I donât feel welcome.
Any helpful advice? (After the new MRI, we will revisit changing from Copaxone to another medication.)
submitted by dysteach-MT to MultipleSclerosis [link] [comments]
I was diagnosed with MS in 2012 when I was 38. I had weird vision issues, it felt like one eye wasnât coordinating with the other. I could look at my classroom and see the students, but their faces were blurry. I couldnât drive at night because of light tracers. Went through the normal ophthalmology channels and was referred to a neurologic ophthalmologist. He did a MRI just to be safe because there were no signs of optic neuritis. After my very first MRI, the nurse asked if this was my first, and said the doctor would call me the next day. I told her my doctor was leaving for a month and he said heâd follow up with me when he got back. The nurse said no, he would call me the next day. Surprise! You have MS and arenât having acid flashbacks from the one time you took it at age 18.
Luckily, I was living in an amazing state with an impressive University medical center. My neurologist taught at the U and going to an appointment was like attending a class. He whipped out a sharpie and starting making amazing flow charts on the paper covering the exam table. He gave it to me at the end. Since the MRI showed active lesions, I took a super high dose of steroids. In the following 5 years, MRIs showed no new lesions, so I never started any medication. My brain developed new pathways and my vision cleared up.
In 2017, I decided to move home to Montana. After the fun experience of establishing care, I was given an absolutely wonderful neurologist in my large and growing city. He wasnât an MS specialist, but there are only 2 in our state. At this point, I didnât think I had MS since no new lesions in 5 years. So, I got an MRI here, and low and behold, new lesions. (Part of the reason is the MRI machine here is newer with better quality.) I was started on Copaxone. About 4 months after starting, I had a relapse and lost some mild functioning in my left hand. In addition, I started having problems with my vision again- same issue as before. Had a follow up MRI showing no new lesions. I was also under a ton of stress during that time. Iâve now figured out that when I get stressed, my brain âforgetsâ the new neural pathway and reverts to the old broken pathway.
So, I was struggling with high stress from my job and extreme exhaustion. He sent me for a sleep study and I was diagnosed with apnea and started using a C-Pap. No change on the exhaustion. They started me on Modafinil and it was a game changer. Over the next 2 years, I lost a significant amount of weight (in a healthy way). My next sleep study showed no apnea at all (yay!) but my oxygen levels dropped significantly when I slept. So now, Iâm on oxygen when I sleep. My sleep doctor did some blood tests that showed my iron levels were low but my ferritin test was high, so I couldnât take any supplements.
Then, my neurologist, who I absolutely adore, explained that the entire neurology department (doctors only) quit due to the horrible administration. I had access to a PA over the next year. Just to be clear, there are two MS specialists in my state- the one 2 hours away was not accepting any new patients and the one 3 hours away had a 2 year wait. I live in the fastest growing city in the US, and itâs a college town. The hospital here is very large and serves all the rural communities. Luckily, a new health clinic extension is opening and Iâm hoping the competition will bring positive changes. But, new clinic wonât have a neurologist for at least another year.
In the meantime, my cognitive and executive functioning have fallen off of a cliff. My short term memory is the same as a goldfish. My exhaustion is at an all time high and Modafinil assistance has plateaued. I quit my job and now am doing private tutoring- but I can usually only handle 4 hours a day. I can still tutor because I have been doing the same program for over 20 years, but learning something new is almost impossible. Perfect example of executive functioning issues: I went over to help a friend learn how to can and make jam. No problem! Then I go to pack up my stuff and I canât figure out how to do it. It usually takes me 3 or 4 tries to leave the house, even if I have tried to set out what I need the night before. I have a waitlist of private clients needing help, but Iâve become so flaky with cancelling sessions because I never know when I will hit a brick wall, so I donât want to start with any new clients.
Then, I get a call scheduling me with a new neurologist to establish care. Yay!!! And I find out that he is a neurology generalist, and of course, 1 neurologist to cover a large population. I like the new neurologist, but can tell he was stressed and overworked. I had the hard conversation about going on a partial disability. I am also having some cardiac issues that also cause fatigue. And surprise- here is another lesion that they missed on my last MRI a year ago. I asked how to start the disability process, and the doctor said the hospital used to have a social worker to help but not any more.
Now, Iâm scheduled for a follow up MRI and neuropsych evaluation. I had to have an internal heart monitor installed. A new cardiologist ordered genetic testing, and that came back with an âunknown markerâ. Iâm also having problems with my joints hurting and popping out of place (this is also congenital- my joints dislocate super easy). I am depressed over not being able to afford to live. I am overwhelmed with trying to figure out public assistance here. The local Human Rights non profit has helped me apply for SNAP and emergency rental assistance, and I found someone at our low income clinic to help with disability paperwork today, but she said I will be denied and it will be a long process.
I canât do the paperwork on my own. I did find a counselor and have an appointment next week. I feel like I am drowning and am grieving losing my independence. The worst part is that my MS is invisible. I have no lesions on my spine, and one optic nerve is slightly larger than the other, but healed. My left hand is a little slow, but only I notice. I grew up in a family (and state culture!) that you pull yourself up by your bootstraps and donât ask for help. People canât see that Iâm struggling. Iâve been accused of being high when I repeat a conversation or have a hard time coming up with a word. My fabulous brother accused me of making it all up to be a âfreeloaderâ that is too lazy to work. There are no MS support groups here. Parkinsonâs & Huntingtonâs have multiple groups. Even attending an MS group is difficult because I donât have mobility problems and I donât feel welcome.
Any helpful advice? (After the new MRI, we will revisit changing from Copaxone to another medication.)
2023.06.01 16:42 No_Competition4897 [HIRING] 25 Jobs in SC Hiring Now!
2023.06.01 16:26 No_Competition4897 [HIRING] 25 Jobs in RI Hiring Now!
2023.06.01 16:10 graywolt Total Flipped Action - Total Drama, Drama, Drama, Drama Island & Monster Cash
 | submitted by graywolt to Totaldrama [link] [comments] Ella wins Total Drama Island! Ella wins Total Drama Island in a 10-2 vote. When Dawn sings "You've Got a Best Buddy" from Toybox Film, Ella is able to get that last bit of motivation & outrun Jasmine to win Total Drama Island. Ella is crying tears of joy & can't believe that she won. Scott says that he can't wait for his money, & Anne Maria throws her can of hairspray at him to shut him up. Beardo, Sierra, & Staci start chanting "Ella", which gets everyone besides Scarlett, Alejandro, & Scott, who is nursing his bruise, to cheer. Alejandro is still in the outhouse, now wondering who won while fiddling with the door. Zoey consoles Jasmine, saying that at least she gets about c$2,300, & the fact half of the money will be going to charity. Jasmine goes up to Ella, & thanks her for the money she got, & says that Ella was a great competitor. At the final campfire ceremony, Chris announces Ella as the winner of Total Drama Island. Ella cheers and receives her check and the final marshmallow. Ella puts the marshmallow in her pocket, saying that she'll keep it for the memories. Geoff comments that it's time for them to do something, to which Beardo, Geoff, & Owen dump Chris in the lake to the cheers of the other campers and Chef. When the boys chase after Chef to throw him in the lake next, Jasmine asks if Ella liked seeing Chris dumped in the lake. She giggles, saying yes. The camera pans out from Jasmine & Ella, revealing the boys chasing after Chef in the background. Later, Alejandro finally breaks out of the bathroom, just in time to head on the boat to the playa. Total Flipped Island Final Statistics 22nd - Staci 21st - Sierra 20th - Cameron 19th - Sadie 18th - Anne Maria 17th - Scott Eliminated - Harold 16th - Beardo 15th - Scarlett 14th - Sky Eliminated - Brick 13th - Owen 12th - Dawn 11th - Katie 10th - Trent 9th - Zoey 8th - Brick 7th - Izzy 6th - Harold 5th - Geoff 4th - Alejandro 3rd - Max 2nd - Jasmine 1st - Ella Highest Ranking Male Screaming Gopher - Max (3/22) Lowest Ranking Male Screaming Gopher - Scott (17/22). Highest Ranking Female Screaming Gopher - Izzy (7/22). Lowest Ranking Female Screaming Gopher - Staci (22/22). Highest Ranking Male Killer Bass - Alejandro (4/22). Lowest Ranking Male Killer Bass - Cameron (20/22). Highest Ranking Female Killer Bass - Ella (1/22). Lowest Ranking Female Killer Bass - Sierra (21/22). The episode begins with the campers throwing a final party at Playa Des Losers on their last day before they have to go back home and return to their normal routines: Brick, Cameron, & Owen are playing Beardo, Harold, & Max in a game of ultimate frisbee, Staci & Sierra are chatting over burgers, & Anne Maria is blatantly staring at Alejandro. In the confessional, Alejandro is asking why Anne Maria is still infatuated with him despite the fact he literally eliminated her. Anne Maria comes in & says it's the fact that he's hot. Back at the party, Izzy is feasting herself on marshmallows and soda, which she ends up barfing from, but goes for more, which somehow charms Owen. Alejandro is saying that he has no clue how he is going to face his family like this, & hates that his older brother Jose has another thing to dunk on him with. We cut back to the frisbee game, & Brick tosses the frisbee to Cameron in the end zone. Cameron catches it & gains a point while jumping & cheering wildly. Dawn & Zoey are watching & cheering. He asks if this is what organized sports are like, & Brick says yes. Suddenly, Chris arrives holding a briefcase and offers the campers one final challenge: a race to find a briefcase that contains one-million dollars. The challenge is to locate the briefcase and bring it back to the Dock of Shame. Chris sweetens the deal saying that Ella can keep the initial 100k & still play. Ella immediately runs off with Beardo to find the million, but no one else budges. When Chris says that Ella & Beardo are about to win a very easy million, they finally budge, but not before it turns into a 20-person pile-up. Cameron suggests that maybe they could share it, but everyone besides Dawn & Brick is still bickering. They all untangle themselves, & get into the following groups: Sierra, Staci, & Sadie Cameron & Dawn Katie & Geoff Anne Maria & Alejandro (in the confessional, the latter's eye is twitching) Sky, Zoey, Jasmine, & Trent Owen, Izzy, & Max Brick & Harold Scott & Scarlett are the only ones that lack partners, so they begrudgingly team up. After two hours pass by without anyone finding the suitcase, Chris gives the first clue about its location over the loudspeakers: "It's just hanging around." The case is then seen hanging from a tree branch. Alejandro is seen walking around the woods with Anne Maria, paparazzi, who can't concentrate because she keeps staring at him. Then, wandering with Owen & Max, Izzy thinks it'd be a great idea to think like a tree to find the case, hanging from it and singing. Max asks how Owen puts up with this as Izzy is insane, which Owen replies with "insanely hot" Scarlett & Scott reach where Owen, Izzy, & Max are, & overhear where Izzy thinks the case is. Scott hops onto the tree & tries to hijack the vine, getting into a slapfight with Izzy. Trent, Sky, Jasmine, & Zoey are looking around, & notice the case in the tree. Jasmine reaches up to grab it, but a eagle takes it & flies away, causing them to groan. Just as they leave, Katie and Geoff walk right under it and start making out. Chris, watching from a helicopter above, is visibly annoyed at their incompetence. Alejandro can't stand being with Anne Maria any longer, so he ditches her by saying that he needs to use the bathroom. When Anne Maria realizes this, she is pissed. Sierra, Staci, & Sadie are walking around when Staci asks why Sadie joined them. She says that she wants to give her friend time with her boyfriend & thought that Sierra & Staci were cool. They beam at the compliment, then Alejandro shows up. He asks Staci & Sadie where they've looked for the money, & they tell him everything. He leaves smirking, & the aforementioned girls slapped their faces. The eagle with the case finally drops it, & it lands on Scott's neck, knocking him out. When he wakes up, he sees that Scarlett is gone, prompting him to call Scarlett a traitor. Then he realizes that if the situation was flipped, he'd do the same thing, & compliments her idea before running to get the case. Because Scarlett is not very athletic, she is now dealing with a stitch. In the background, Scott & Jasmine are catching up to her, causing her to turn it up a gear. Eventually, Scott & Jasmine simultaneously tackle the genius redhead, causing the case to fall into the river. The groans of Trent's group, Scott, & Scarlett can be heard all over camp. Back with Sierra's group, they are all griping about how annoyingly good he is. Sierra is saying that he should've eaten the laxative cupcakes he made for Jasmine, which get giggles from Sadie & Staci. On top of a cliff, Geoff & Katie are making out, & nearly fall from a cliff. Alejandro is scaling a tree, trying to find the case. He gets very close to an air balloon with an intern in it, causing said intern to notify Chris. The host dispatches Chef on an ATV to stop the threat. The intern tries to hit Alejandro with a boombox & cable, but Alejandro grabs on & chases the intern out and hijacks the balloon, where he then starts to head off towards the campgrounds. Brick & Harold find the floating case but must go upwards because Scott has blocked the only other way. So, Harold quickly builds a parachute to cushion the fall. Him & Brick initially float down safely, but then a pebble rips a hole in the parachute, causing them to descend quickly. They create a crater when they fall, & Brick says that he lost the case when they were plummeting. They find a canoe & start to paddle away. Cameron & Dawn find the dented case & pick up the pace so they can get to the dock. They run into Ella & Beardo, which prompts Cameron to ask if they should split the money, as c$250,000 isn't a bad reward. They all agree & go back to running. Scott hears their fall & runs back into the forest. Anne Maria has given up on looking for Alejandro & is now looking around for the million. She sprays her hair, which alerts Bacon that she's nearby. He roars at her & Anne Maria is petrified. Bacon bites on her head, losing all his teeth, which embarrasses him, causing him to run away. Anne Maria is smirking while tapping her hair, which clanks metallically. Ella, Beardo, Dawn, & Cameron are finally out of the gorge when they hear a whoosh from a hot-air balloon. Alejandro throws down the boom cord, successfully tying it around the case. Alejandro is now trying to steer, but it's getting tough because the four have now hopped onto the boom cord. He attempts to shake them off by going through a tree, but all that does is get the four closer to the basket. Back with Geoff & Katie, they are walking through the woods and encounter a baby moose, attempting to reach a branch that is too high up for it. Geoff decides to help it by lowering the branch, but Geoff slips on a mud slick, causing him to land atop the moose. When the baby's mother appears and sees Geoff on top of its baby, it's enraged. The moose starts chasing Geoff and Bridgette. Meanwhile, Chef, on his ATV, drives up to Zoey, Jasmine, Sky, and Trent, who have had no luck in the competition so far, and asks if they've seen the balloon. He explains the situation, including how Alejandro has the case and is on his way to the finish line. Both he and Zoey believe that Alejandro will definitely win. While Chef is talking, Jasmine picks up a small log nearby and knocks Chef out with it, hijacking the ATV and taking Zoey, Sky, & Trent with her. Elsewhere, Anne Maria is still searching. Geoff and Katie then race by, still being pursued by the angry moose. They tell Anne Maria to run as they race by, and she complies, joining in the dangerous chase. Alejandro's balloon starts to float into the campgrounds. Dawn, Cameron, Ella, & Beardo manage to climb into the basket with Alejandro. However, this only puts them in more danger as Alejandro puts Cameron in a headlock and demands the case from them, or they will fall. Harold and Brick arrive in the campgrounds shortly after and see the hot-air balloon with Cameron, Dawn, Ella, Beardo, & the case all inside. They quickly abandon the canoe and race into the campgrounds, only for Sky, Trent, Zoey, and Jasmine to emerge from the woods on their ATV. They are driving close to the air balloon, hoping to take it down. In the boathouse, Sierra, Sadie, & Staci are gearing up with fish water & paintballs to take down Alejandro. Staci says that she's learned a lot about paintball because her uncle owns a paintball arena. She says that she's not lying, as she has them as friends now. The three of them hide behind the communal washrooms, finding an airborne Alejandro. They see Geoff, Katie, Anne Maria and the moose race by, and quickly retreat. Meanwhile, the three campers who are being chased by the moose see the massive diving board platform & climb up. As they climb up to the safety of the incredibly high diving board, Sky has an idea. She runs into the mess hall & grabs the mounted moose head, running back & passing it to Zoey. She shows it to the moose & scares it into running away to the woods. Meanwhile, the hot-air balloon is about to crash, with only Sky seeing this. With Alejandro strangling Cameron, everyone in the basket doesn't realize any of this until it's too late. Dawn, Cameron, Ella, & Beardo are forced to jump because of this, & the fact that an eagle is about to tear a hole in the balloon. Alejandro thinks he's won but is forced to jump because of the eagle. 9 people are now on the diving board, & 8 of them are trying to knock the case out of Alejandro's mitts. Jasmine shows up out of nowhere, climbs the ladder, & successfully knocks the case out of his hands. It hits the edge of the pool below at an angle, and bounces straight towards the communal washrooms where Sadie, Staci, & Sierra reappear. Sierra grabs it & tells her teammates to run, but Max trips Sierra & grabs the case. Staci & Sadie splatter Max with fish water & guts, making him scream & throw the case into the air. Izzy shoves Staci out of the way, catches it, & runs with a full head of steam. It looks like Izzy will have a cool million until she trips on thin air & fumbles the case towards the dock. It is at this moment when everything starts to fall apart: Izzy quickly gets back to her feet and chases after the case. Trent & Sky run past Sadie & a bucket-headed Max, but Owen is catching up. Scarlett runs out of the forest, right in front of the wobbling diving board. It breaks, & everyone besides Anne Maria is sliding on the speeding diving board, which picks up Scarlett. The former's hair has made a crater in the ground. The moose, after having presumably defeated Zoey, rides in with Zoey on its back, also racing towards the Dock. Harold is running to the dock, trying to reach the case. As the moose rides onto the Dock, it bucks Zoey off its back into the water. The diving board group slides by, heading straight for Izzy, Scarlett, Trent, Harold, Max, Owen, and the case just as they are all right on the end of the Dock. These fifteen campers instantly collide at once, & land in the water along with Zoey, who's there already. As these sixteen emerge to the surface, the briefcase is floating by itself in the water, until a shark rises beneath it and swallows it. The seagull with the fragment of net wrapped around its neck points and laughs at the campers' misfortune, until the same shark eats it. Chris then arrives in a helicopter and is disappointed that the campers lost the case. He then tells the sixteen of them the bad news: they are all tied. So, to break this tie, they will all have to return for another shot at the million dollars in season two. Ella, Cameron, & Owen are the most enthused about this, while others like Scarlett & Jasmine look less pleased. He tells the dry campers - Scott, Anne Maria, Sadie, Staci, Brick, & Sierra that they will be watching on the sidelines, losing their shot at winning. Scott is the most vocal against this, & Jasmine asks if she & him can switch. Chris says no dice, as the fine print says that you must play if you are told. In the confessional, Katie & Sadie are sad to be separated, but Sadie says that they both will be fine, as they have other friends, & they handled being apart for over a week. Scarlett says that after this season, she will not be messed with, & will take revenge on "the purple haired gnome". Chris then tells the returning sixteen campers to report to a brand-new location in two days, where they will compete in a whole new set of challenges, and the last one standing will receive one-million dollars. He then tells viewers to tune in for the second season. TDA Cast Monster Cash We see an old, clunky bus driving up to the set of Total Drama Action that has the castmates who made it to season 2. The bus stops, & Cameron, Izzy (who refers to herself as E-Scope), Owen, Ella, Zoey, Trent, Beardo, Katie, Geoff, Dawn, Harold, Alejandro, Jasmine, Max, Scarlett, & Sky get off the bus, taking a look at the film lot. Alejandro & Jasmine are glaring daggers at each other, while Max is ignoring the glare Scarlett is giving him. Beardo, Ella, Cameron, & Dawn are talking animatedly about their lives, with Beardo saying that because of the show, he's been getting bigger DJ gigs. The other three congratulate him for this, then Chris shows up & tells the cast about the new confessional, & the new elimination ceremony, which is called the Gilded Chris awards. Scarlett asks why he's so vain, & Dawn says that it's because he wasn't loved enough as a child. After the snickers subside, Chris says that today's challenge is to race to a pair of trailers before the monster catches them. When Chris says to go, everyone starts running, with Izzy immediately getting captured. In the makeup confessional, Owen is asking how he's going to compete with the giant monster. Sky asks Trent how they are supposed to find the actors' trailers, & a confident Alejandro tells them to follow him. He runs off, & Trent & Sky don't follow him. Alejandro gets captured by Chef, but it takes a second before he is picked up. Chef admits that Alejandro is hot, while Alejandro is saying in the confessional that at least he has his natural beauty, even though most people hate him. Geoff & Katie are making out on the ground, & Jasmine runs up to them & says that they are here to compete. Geoff & Katie seem to realize this in the confessional, but then go back to making out. One by one, each castmate is captured, and deposited into a bounce house by the monster, eventually leaving Owen as the last person standing. When Chef finally finds him, and attempts to pick him up, Owen's weight makes the monster malfunction, since he's too heavy to pick up. Ten hours later, an exhausted Owen finds the other castmates and releases them from the bounce house by puncturing it with a sharp needle he had found. The castmates are at the dining hall for part 2 of this challenge. Before Chris can even explain anything, Owen goes ham on all of the prop food, finishing in less than a minute. Chris explains that he needed to find a golden key, & Owen tosses him one he found in a prop turkey. All of the girls besides Izzy are weirded out by this, while all of the boys say that Owen's got guts. As the castmates make their way to the trailers, one trailer is accidentally crushed by the monster, who is bringing E-Scope back from their date. When asked to choose which trailer the guys get, Owen, much to the other guys' anger, chooses the recently crushed one, claiming "it has more character." The girls cheer happily while the guys get mad at Owen, until Chef crushes the other trailer as well. After the trailers are repaired by Chef, the castmates make decisions on who to bunk with. For the boys, Beardo bunks with Harold, & Geoff with Max. Cameron requests that he doesn't share a bunk with Alejandro, so Owen volunteers, making the last bunk pairs Cameron & Trent, and Alejandro & Owen. For the girls, Ella bunks with Dawn, Sky bunks with Zoey, Scarlett bunks with Izzy much to the former's chagrin, & Katie gets a bunk to herself, as Jasmine will be sleeping on the floor. Early the next morning, Chris yells into a megaphone to wake the castmates up, just to mess with them, before letting them go back to sleep, reminding them of their required early morning wakeup. After Chris signs off the episode, the monster roars in the distance, and Chris demands the monster be deactivated. After the credits, Scarlett says that she won't be outplaced by Max, & that everyone should watch out, because she will do anything it takes to win. Her eyes flicker red for a minute before turning back to green, then the episode ends. Vote two people for invincibility, & feel free to come up with any plot points! |
2023.06.01 16:03 BoukoKakuCatharsis "Max" by deathproofpony
>be a purple fluffy with a yellow mane named Max
>you remember having a daddy. he was a nice man.
>then the herd came... the meanie herd.
>the unicorn that was in charge... he told you all sorts of things
>he said there was a magical place called Spaghetti Land where you could eat and play all day
>Daddy told you yes... there is a Spaghetti Land but he couldn't afford to take you there
>you didn't know what that meant, but the herd promised to take you
>they said he was a meanie daddy and a dummy
>you listened.
>you left home with them... but soon it was clear the unicorn, Spanky, didn't know where Spaghetti Land was
>you missed daddy
>the herd had wandered for many yellow sky balls.
>people would chase the herd from their places, no matter how much Spanky threatened them
>one day you ended up in a place with many good nummies. some you remembered from daddy's house. tomatoes, carrots, beans...
>but there was so much more! nummies everywhere! it wasn't spaghetti but it was food! and it was GOOD!
>the herd started to stuff themselves as Spanky bragged how smart he was
>then THE MAN came
>he was mad that the herd was there. he told you to leave.
>Spanky said it was your land now and said he'd give big hurties if THE MAN didn't go away
>THE MAN didn't like that at all.
>he took a stick and beat Spanky over and over. Spanky howled and cried and finally stopped moving
>you don't know if he took the Long Sleep or if he just had really bad hurties
>then THE MAN started to come after the other fluffies
>everyone ran in a different direction
>that was how you came to be with Diamond
>Diamond is a pretty filly. she seems too young to have babies but Spanky said she was ready
>she cried when Spanky gave her the good feels but when her belly started to get big she was happy she would have babies soon
>that was... a bunch of yellow sky balls ago
>Diamond can barely walk now. you have to roll her most of the time. sometimes she gets dizzy and makes mouth yuckies
>still, Diamond seems to like you and thanks you for taking care of her
>you've wandered through the Big Green. there were many trees... more than you had ever seen
>but now you see fields stretching far into the distance. some have big tall plants with green things growing in them
>it sort of reminds you of corn, but thats not what corn looks like... is it? corn is yellow!
>other fields have short plants... you dig some up and find sweet red round roots
>you've never had them before but they're yummy!
>"muh... max... max... dimun haff big poopies!"
>why is that your problem? make big poopies, whatever. you're more interested in these red things...
>"eeeeeeeeee! hunnnggghhh!"
>you hear a plop and then diamond starts squealing in joy!
>"babeh come! babeh come! max hewp wiff babehs!"
>oh! babies! you hurry over and pick up the foal with your mouth and place it next to diamond's head
>it doesn't taste pretty but you know it's what you have to do
>she starts licking it clean. the tiny foal starts to chirp. you know what that means... it's hungry
>diamond places him at her teat and it drinks hungrily
>"eeeeeee! notha babeh!"
>this one seems to get a little stuck coming out, tangled in diamond's dirty fluff
>you carefully pull little bits of fluff from the baby's sticky body and manage to pull it out all the way with your mouth
>like its sibling, diamond cleans it and places this one, a filly, on her teat
>"haff bootiful babehs, dimun!
>"dimun wuv babehs..."
>she starts to sing some sort of song as they nurse silently. you look down at them and smile. it's like your own little family!
>"hunnnngghhhh! eeeeeeeee! notha babeh come! max hewp!"
>this one slides right out... and it doesn't seem right
>this babeh doesn't have legs. just tiny nubs that move back and forth
>it's smaller than the others, too. a little gray thing
>still, a baby is a baby, right? you place it next to diamond's head...
>"NU! dat dummy babeh! nu wan!"
>"buh... is babeh! wub babeh!"
>"nuu! dat dummy babeh!"
>diamond kicks at the little foal, striking it and making it roll through the grass
>it starts chirping, hungry for milk, for love.
>okay. if diamond won't clean it, you will
>it does not taste pretty at all, but you eat one of the red things and it makes your mouth taste good again
>diamond stares angrily at the tiny foal the entire time as it flops around helplessly in the grass
>"max cwean babeh... now feed, pwease."
>"nuu. dummy babeh nu haff miwlkies. dat onwy fo gud babehs!"
>"juss giff miwlkies! dun be bad mumma!"
>"AM NOT BAD MUMMA! DAT BAD BABBEH!"
>now you're getting mad. it's a baby. it needs love. it needs milk.
>you do the only thing you can think of
>you smack diamond in the mouth
>"OWIE! why huwt fwuffy?"
>""yu bad mumma! yu giff babeh miwlkies NAOW!"
>"NUUU!"
>you sit down on diamond's chest, pinning her down
>"get off fwuffy! get off or giff big owies..."
>"DUMMY MUMMA! YU SHUDDUP AN STAY DERE OR GET BIG BAD POOPIES!"
>diamond looks anxiously at your poopie place, positioned right in front of her face
>she stops struggling and remains silent
>you pluck one of the foals off her teat and put the legless one on instead
>you turn to see diamond grimacing, frowing... she doesn't want this baby to have any milk
>tough. this one gets milk. whether she likes it or not.
>the tiny baby finally finishes drinking and burps. it spits a little milk up.
>you lick its face clean and the baby chirps happily, trying to snuggle into its mother's fluff
>"naow get off dimun! nu wan babeh!"
>you pluck the baby off her belly and place it on your own back. it chirps momentarily but then snuggles deep in your fluff
>"yu meanie fwuffy!"
>"yu dummy mumma!"
>"yu go way!"
>"i wiwll go way! dun wan be wiff dummy mumma! you BAD MUMMA!"
>you turn and lift your tail. a single poopie pellet pops out of your poopie place and bounces off diamond's face
>"NAOW YU POOPIE FACE! HA HA HA HA!"
>you blow a raspberry at diamond and start waddling through the big fields
>it's been quite a while now. your leggies are really starting to hurt.
>the baby snores slightly as it sleeps buried in your fluff
>you have to... have to rest. can't walk... any more.
>wait... is that a building? it is! the yellow sky ball is disappearing in the distance... the dark is coming. the cold.
>it has been getting very cold at night
>you don't dare go near the human place... not yet. not until you can check it out
>aha! a big pile of... what's it called? hay? straw?
>you barely remember long ago when you lived with other fluffies that's what mister tom put down on the floor
>sometimes it would smell bad from poopies and bad wawas but it was comfy, too
>it will do for tonight.
>you slowly dig your way into the big pile of straw, careful not to knock the baby from your back
>you finally get to the center of the pile and pull the baby from your back, placing it the fluff on your side
>it nuzzles against you and starts to chirp
>"nuu babeh... nu haff miwlkies... dun cwy..."
>the baby chirps a bit more but thankfully it goes back to sleep
>you sleep as well. for a long time.
>"MOOOOOOOOOOO!"
>you startle awake. what was that? a monster?
>you poke your head out of the straw pile. you see a big black and white thing nearby
>strange... it looks sort of like it has... four teats. like a mumma fluffy.
>did it see you? is it a monster?
>no, it just makes another low, deep sound and eats the grass, flapping its tail
>then you see a human coming! you slowly pull your head back into the straw so he can't see you
>the human puts a little chair down and sits on it next to the black and white thing
>he squeezes its teats into some sort of metal thing - MILK! YOU SEE MILK! LOTS OF IT!
>there's enough for an entire HERD!
>the human picks up the metal thing and his little chair and walks away
>you wonder...
>if that's milk...
>you look at the foal laying on the straw underneath you. it starts to chirp again. it's very hungry.
>you have to try.
>you pick up the foal with your mouth and carefully walk over to the black and white thing. it doesn't seem to notice you
>you lick your lips... maybe... maybe just a taste. to make sure its okay for the baby, of course
>you suckle on the big creature's teat. it makes another low, loud sound and flaps its tail but doesn't try to give you hurties
>you taste fresh milk flowing into your mouth... it's SOOOOO good, it reminds you of when you were a baby
>you... just barely remember mama. she was a good mama but mister tom took you from her. mama cried...
>enough. you know instinctively milk isn't good for adult fluffies.
>you hold up the baby with your front hooves and let it drink
>it suckles hungrily from the big creature's teat. coughing up some milk after a short time
>"dun dwink too much babeh... dwink swow..."
>as if understanding you, the foal peeps once and goes back to drinking, taking its time now
>finally it burps and licks it tiny lips
>now... to see if this is someplace you can stay
>its a big red building. you hear the sounds of more of the black and white creatures inside
>you walk around the outside of the building... aha! a loose board!
>being careful not to shake the baby loose you pull the board out and make a fluffy-sized hole
>it's warm in here. you can see some sort of metal thing in the middle of the place that is making heat
>there are big containers of water and lots of straw for a bed
>and best of all... there are other black and white creatures. plenty of milk!
>it's perfect!
>you spend the next couple of yellow sky balls feeding the baby and letting it nestle in your fluff
>when its light out you go to the big field and eat the sweet red things
>at night you sleep in the warmth in the human building
>it's almost too good to be true
>it's been four yellow sky balls since you arrived. but the baby has barely grown.
>that doesn't seem right to you... don't babies get big when they have milk?
>you lick the baby a little. it wiggles its tiny nubs and chirps at you, its eyes barely open
>shouldn't... shouldn't a baby be able to speak by now?
>"Well, well, what have we here..."
>the human! you were so focused on the baby you didn't hear him come in!
>no... this is more important... you have to take care of the baby... you have to!
>"All right, let's go..."
>the human approaches, reaching out to grab you
>you shrink away, crying at him
>"pwease nu! babeh haff huwties! somefing wong wiff babeh! pwease nu take way!"
>"Baby?"
>the human kneels down and gently picks up the tiny foal
>you place your hooves on his leg, reaching for the foal desperately
>"pwease nu huwt babeh!"
>"Easy... I won't hurt it..."
>the human looks the baby over and places it back down into the straw
>he strokes the fluff on your head
>"It's not healthy, fella... it's sickly. How long have you had it?"
>"dimun haff babeh fo o fifve yewwow sky bawl ago! she nu wan babeh! max take cawe of babeh!"
>the human listens intently
>"Another fluffy had this foal a few days ago and didn't want it? So you took care of it? Your name is Max?"
>"ya! dimun meanie mumma an nu wan babeh!"
>"Well, it's a runt... that's why. You did a good job taking care of her but... it's sick. It's not going to make it."
>"max dun unnastan! babeh get huwties?"
>"It's... dying. Do you understand dying?"
>you nod sadly. "da wong sweep."
>"The long sleep. Right."
>"buh... buh is nu faiwr! widdle babeh du nuffin wong! babeh juss need miwlkies and huggies and WUV!"
>you feel tears starting to drip down your face
>the baby chirps and starts coughing. it spits milk up and gags.
>"nuuu! babeh! nuuu!"
>you jump down from the human and pick the baby up, holding it against your chest
>"pwease babeh... dun take wong sweep! max giff mo miwlkies! giff huggies! giff..."
>the baby gags one last time and stops moving.
>"giff wuv..."
>the baby doesn't move. you silently place it back in the straw and sit there, tears pouring from your eyes
>"babeh juss wan wuv..."
>"You gave it love, Max. You gave it more love than its mother. You did a good thing. You were a good daddy."
>"gud dada? if max gud dada den why haff huwties inside?"
>"We all hurt inside when someone we love goes away... takes the long sleep."
>"huwties go way?"
>"Sometimes... it helps if you just try to remember the good and forget the bad."
>you nod. "foget bad..."
>"You hungry, boy? Want some food?"
>"haff some wed fings fwom field but yah... still hungwy..."
>"Like the beets, huh? Then you'll love my corn cakes."
>"wut bout babeh?"
>"Let's get you something to eat and then we'll bury the baby. Okay?"
>"buwy babeh..."
>the human picks you up and strokes your soft fluff, carrying you to his home
>you sadly look over his shoulder at the baby laying in the straw
>you whisper to it "sowwy babeh" and bury your face in the human's chest
>you were a good daddy... even if just for a little while
Source
submitted by BoukoKakuCatharsis to fluffycommunity [link] [comments]
>you remember having a daddy. he was a nice man.
>then the herd came... the meanie herd.
>the unicorn that was in charge... he told you all sorts of things
>he said there was a magical place called Spaghetti Land where you could eat and play all day
>Daddy told you yes... there is a Spaghetti Land but he couldn't afford to take you there
>you didn't know what that meant, but the herd promised to take you
>they said he was a meanie daddy and a dummy
>you listened.
>you left home with them... but soon it was clear the unicorn, Spanky, didn't know where Spaghetti Land was
>you missed daddy
>the herd had wandered for many yellow sky balls.
>people would chase the herd from their places, no matter how much Spanky threatened them
>one day you ended up in a place with many good nummies. some you remembered from daddy's house. tomatoes, carrots, beans...
>but there was so much more! nummies everywhere! it wasn't spaghetti but it was food! and it was GOOD!
>the herd started to stuff themselves as Spanky bragged how smart he was
>then THE MAN came
>he was mad that the herd was there. he told you to leave.
>Spanky said it was your land now and said he'd give big hurties if THE MAN didn't go away
>THE MAN didn't like that at all.
>he took a stick and beat Spanky over and over. Spanky howled and cried and finally stopped moving
>you don't know if he took the Long Sleep or if he just had really bad hurties
>then THE MAN started to come after the other fluffies
>everyone ran in a different direction
>that was how you came to be with Diamond
>Diamond is a pretty filly. she seems too young to have babies but Spanky said she was ready
>she cried when Spanky gave her the good feels but when her belly started to get big she was happy she would have babies soon
>that was... a bunch of yellow sky balls ago
>Diamond can barely walk now. you have to roll her most of the time. sometimes she gets dizzy and makes mouth yuckies
>still, Diamond seems to like you and thanks you for taking care of her
>you've wandered through the Big Green. there were many trees... more than you had ever seen
>but now you see fields stretching far into the distance. some have big tall plants with green things growing in them
>it sort of reminds you of corn, but thats not what corn looks like... is it? corn is yellow!
>other fields have short plants... you dig some up and find sweet red round roots
>you've never had them before but they're yummy!
>"muh... max... max... dimun haff big poopies!"
>why is that your problem? make big poopies, whatever. you're more interested in these red things...
>"eeeeeeeeee! hunnnggghhh!"
>you hear a plop and then diamond starts squealing in joy!
>"babeh come! babeh come! max hewp wiff babehs!"
>oh! babies! you hurry over and pick up the foal with your mouth and place it next to diamond's head
>it doesn't taste pretty but you know it's what you have to do
>she starts licking it clean. the tiny foal starts to chirp. you know what that means... it's hungry
>diamond places him at her teat and it drinks hungrily
>"eeeeeee! notha babeh!"
>this one seems to get a little stuck coming out, tangled in diamond's dirty fluff
>you carefully pull little bits of fluff from the baby's sticky body and manage to pull it out all the way with your mouth
>like its sibling, diamond cleans it and places this one, a filly, on her teat
>"haff bootiful babehs, dimun!
>"dimun wuv babehs..."
>she starts to sing some sort of song as they nurse silently. you look down at them and smile. it's like your own little family!
>"hunnnngghhhh! eeeeeeeee! notha babeh come! max hewp!"
>this one slides right out... and it doesn't seem right
>this babeh doesn't have legs. just tiny nubs that move back and forth
>it's smaller than the others, too. a little gray thing
>still, a baby is a baby, right? you place it next to diamond's head...
>"NU! dat dummy babeh! nu wan!"
>"buh... is babeh! wub babeh!"
>"nuu! dat dummy babeh!"
>diamond kicks at the little foal, striking it and making it roll through the grass
>it starts chirping, hungry for milk, for love.
>okay. if diamond won't clean it, you will
>it does not taste pretty at all, but you eat one of the red things and it makes your mouth taste good again
>diamond stares angrily at the tiny foal the entire time as it flops around helplessly in the grass
>"max cwean babeh... now feed, pwease."
>"nuu. dummy babeh nu haff miwlkies. dat onwy fo gud babehs!"
>"juss giff miwlkies! dun be bad mumma!"
>"AM NOT BAD MUMMA! DAT BAD BABBEH!"
>now you're getting mad. it's a baby. it needs love. it needs milk.
>you do the only thing you can think of
>you smack diamond in the mouth
>"OWIE! why huwt fwuffy?"
>""yu bad mumma! yu giff babeh miwlkies NAOW!"
>"NUUU!"
>you sit down on diamond's chest, pinning her down
>"get off fwuffy! get off or giff big owies..."
>"DUMMY MUMMA! YU SHUDDUP AN STAY DERE OR GET BIG BAD POOPIES!"
>diamond looks anxiously at your poopie place, positioned right in front of her face
>she stops struggling and remains silent
>you pluck one of the foals off her teat and put the legless one on instead
>you turn to see diamond grimacing, frowing... she doesn't want this baby to have any milk
>tough. this one gets milk. whether she likes it or not.
>the tiny baby finally finishes drinking and burps. it spits a little milk up.
>you lick its face clean and the baby chirps happily, trying to snuggle into its mother's fluff
>"naow get off dimun! nu wan babeh!"
>you pluck the baby off her belly and place it on your own back. it chirps momentarily but then snuggles deep in your fluff
>"yu meanie fwuffy!"
>"yu dummy mumma!"
>"yu go way!"
>"i wiwll go way! dun wan be wiff dummy mumma! you BAD MUMMA!"
>you turn and lift your tail. a single poopie pellet pops out of your poopie place and bounces off diamond's face
>"NAOW YU POOPIE FACE! HA HA HA HA!"
>you blow a raspberry at diamond and start waddling through the big fields
>it's been quite a while now. your leggies are really starting to hurt.
>the baby snores slightly as it sleeps buried in your fluff
>you have to... have to rest. can't walk... any more.
>wait... is that a building? it is! the yellow sky ball is disappearing in the distance... the dark is coming. the cold.
>it has been getting very cold at night
>you don't dare go near the human place... not yet. not until you can check it out
>aha! a big pile of... what's it called? hay? straw?
>you barely remember long ago when you lived with other fluffies that's what mister tom put down on the floor
>sometimes it would smell bad from poopies and bad wawas but it was comfy, too
>it will do for tonight.
>you slowly dig your way into the big pile of straw, careful not to knock the baby from your back
>you finally get to the center of the pile and pull the baby from your back, placing it the fluff on your side
>it nuzzles against you and starts to chirp
>"nuu babeh... nu haff miwlkies... dun cwy..."
>the baby chirps a bit more but thankfully it goes back to sleep
>you sleep as well. for a long time.
>"MOOOOOOOOOOO!"
>you startle awake. what was that? a monster?
>you poke your head out of the straw pile. you see a big black and white thing nearby
>strange... it looks sort of like it has... four teats. like a mumma fluffy.
>did it see you? is it a monster?
>no, it just makes another low, deep sound and eats the grass, flapping its tail
>then you see a human coming! you slowly pull your head back into the straw so he can't see you
>the human puts a little chair down and sits on it next to the black and white thing
>he squeezes its teats into some sort of metal thing - MILK! YOU SEE MILK! LOTS OF IT!
>there's enough for an entire HERD!
>the human picks up the metal thing and his little chair and walks away
>you wonder...
>if that's milk...
>you look at the foal laying on the straw underneath you. it starts to chirp again. it's very hungry.
>you have to try.
>you pick up the foal with your mouth and carefully walk over to the black and white thing. it doesn't seem to notice you
>you lick your lips... maybe... maybe just a taste. to make sure its okay for the baby, of course
>you suckle on the big creature's teat. it makes another low, loud sound and flaps its tail but doesn't try to give you hurties
>you taste fresh milk flowing into your mouth... it's SOOOOO good, it reminds you of when you were a baby
>you... just barely remember mama. she was a good mama but mister tom took you from her. mama cried...
>enough. you know instinctively milk isn't good for adult fluffies.
>you hold up the baby with your front hooves and let it drink
>it suckles hungrily from the big creature's teat. coughing up some milk after a short time
>"dun dwink too much babeh... dwink swow..."
>as if understanding you, the foal peeps once and goes back to drinking, taking its time now
>finally it burps and licks it tiny lips
>now... to see if this is someplace you can stay
>its a big red building. you hear the sounds of more of the black and white creatures inside
>you walk around the outside of the building... aha! a loose board!
>being careful not to shake the baby loose you pull the board out and make a fluffy-sized hole
>it's warm in here. you can see some sort of metal thing in the middle of the place that is making heat
>there are big containers of water and lots of straw for a bed
>and best of all... there are other black and white creatures. plenty of milk!
>it's perfect!
>you spend the next couple of yellow sky balls feeding the baby and letting it nestle in your fluff
>when its light out you go to the big field and eat the sweet red things
>at night you sleep in the warmth in the human building
>it's almost too good to be true
>it's been four yellow sky balls since you arrived. but the baby has barely grown.
>that doesn't seem right to you... don't babies get big when they have milk?
>you lick the baby a little. it wiggles its tiny nubs and chirps at you, its eyes barely open
>shouldn't... shouldn't a baby be able to speak by now?
>"Well, well, what have we here..."
>the human! you were so focused on the baby you didn't hear him come in!
>no... this is more important... you have to take care of the baby... you have to!
>"All right, let's go..."
>the human approaches, reaching out to grab you
>you shrink away, crying at him
>"pwease nu! babeh haff huwties! somefing wong wiff babeh! pwease nu take way!"
>"Baby?"
>the human kneels down and gently picks up the tiny foal
>you place your hooves on his leg, reaching for the foal desperately
>"pwease nu huwt babeh!"
>"Easy... I won't hurt it..."
>the human looks the baby over and places it back down into the straw
>he strokes the fluff on your head
>"It's not healthy, fella... it's sickly. How long have you had it?"
>"dimun haff babeh fo o fifve yewwow sky bawl ago! she nu wan babeh! max take cawe of babeh!"
>the human listens intently
>"Another fluffy had this foal a few days ago and didn't want it? So you took care of it? Your name is Max?"
>"ya! dimun meanie mumma an nu wan babeh!"
>"Well, it's a runt... that's why. You did a good job taking care of her but... it's sick. It's not going to make it."
>"max dun unnastan! babeh get huwties?"
>"It's... dying. Do you understand dying?"
>you nod sadly. "da wong sweep."
>"The long sleep. Right."
>"buh... buh is nu faiwr! widdle babeh du nuffin wong! babeh juss need miwlkies and huggies and WUV!"
>you feel tears starting to drip down your face
>the baby chirps and starts coughing. it spits milk up and gags.
>"nuuu! babeh! nuuu!"
>you jump down from the human and pick the baby up, holding it against your chest
>"pwease babeh... dun take wong sweep! max giff mo miwlkies! giff huggies! giff..."
>the baby gags one last time and stops moving.
>"giff wuv..."
>the baby doesn't move. you silently place it back in the straw and sit there, tears pouring from your eyes
>"babeh juss wan wuv..."
>"You gave it love, Max. You gave it more love than its mother. You did a good thing. You were a good daddy."
>"gud dada? if max gud dada den why haff huwties inside?"
>"We all hurt inside when someone we love goes away... takes the long sleep."
>"huwties go way?"
>"Sometimes... it helps if you just try to remember the good and forget the bad."
>you nod. "foget bad..."
>"You hungry, boy? Want some food?"
>"haff some wed fings fwom field but yah... still hungwy..."
>"Like the beets, huh? Then you'll love my corn cakes."
>"wut bout babeh?"
>"Let's get you something to eat and then we'll bury the baby. Okay?"
>"buwy babeh..."
>the human picks you up and strokes your soft fluff, carrying you to his home
>you sadly look over his shoulder at the baby laying in the straw
>you whisper to it "sowwy babeh" and bury your face in the human's chest
>you were a good daddy... even if just for a little while
Source
2023.06.01 15:52 metalmountains need help finding a place out west that will suit the needs of 3 very different adults.
got kind of a weird one here compared to most of the posts. when I was a kid, my mom moved us from NH to South Carolina to be near my grandparents and get away from our dad. My whole family has hated it since day one. We hate, and have hated, everything about it. the weather, the culture, the economy, the politics, the job market, the lifestyle, THE FUCKING POISON IVY, the bugs, etc. Except my mom, who has turned very conservative and likes the politics.
so I left as soon as I could (around 2001) and have lived all over the US since then. I've lived in NYC, Chicago, Houston, Kansas City, Oakland, Denver, Moab, Wyoming, and Idaho, with some stints in Iceland. My brother stayed, has always lived within 30 minutes of the house we grew up in. My mom stayed because her parents were here, my brother stayed because my mom was here. I'm super sick of having to drive 30+ hours to go see them once every couple of years.
my grandpa died recently, so I moved back temporarily to help my mom out. I don't hate it like I used to but I still don't like it and I don't want to stay, but I like being closer to my family. Long story short, we all got to talking and my bro and mom realized they have no reason to be here anymore and have always wanted to leave, and suddenly they're considering moving to a different part of the country where I can be out west where I love it, and also near them. The problem is...we can't figure out where. I can't think of a place that works for all three of us. I'd be fine with living like two hours from them.
submitted by metalmountains to SameGrassButGreener [link] [comments]
so I left as soon as I could (around 2001) and have lived all over the US since then. I've lived in NYC, Chicago, Houston, Kansas City, Oakland, Denver, Moab, Wyoming, and Idaho, with some stints in Iceland. My brother stayed, has always lived within 30 minutes of the house we grew up in. My mom stayed because her parents were here, my brother stayed because my mom was here. I'm super sick of having to drive 30+ hours to go see them once every couple of years.
my grandpa died recently, so I moved back temporarily to help my mom out. I don't hate it like I used to but I still don't like it and I don't want to stay, but I like being closer to my family. Long story short, we all got to talking and my bro and mom realized they have no reason to be here anymore and have always wanted to leave, and suddenly they're considering moving to a different part of the country where I can be out west where I love it, and also near them. The problem is...we can't figure out where. I can't think of a place that works for all three of us. I'd be fine with living like two hours from them.
- for me: skiing, resort and backcountry. wilderness/NF/BLM access very close by. in the mountains, quiet. mild summers. prefer a lot of sun, but can handle long winters if the skiing is good. somewhere good for dogs. I work as a handyman/renovation carpenter, so proximity to rich people that need stuff built for their second homes is great. I prefer small rural towns in the mountains. would like to be less than an hour from skiing. I'm what I would call a liberal redneck or a liberal-tarian. I own guns and a big diesel truck but think biracial trans folks should be able to smoke weed and eat mushrooms at their wedding if they feel like it. I've sort of resigned myself to being the perpetually single loner outdoorsy mountain sports dog guy, so I kind of don't care about dating, but it wouldn't hurt my feelings if it was possible.
- for my brother: he's a gamer and spends all his free time gaming or on his computer. for work, he does CAD drafting for civil engineering stuff like bridges, but would be able to work pretty much anywhere that needs CAD drafting. like say, metal working companies, furniture, cabinetry, construction, etc. So he probably needs to live near a decent sized city to find work. He's lived in the south his entire life, and he wants a different climate. he says he's ok with cold, but maybe not SUPER cold for super long. He's 40 and wants there to be women in his age bracket to date. he's worried about it being expensive. His politics are similar to mine.
- ok, mom is the tough one: no california because libruls. She has friends in Montana that she would like to be close to, but she also says she doesn't want to live in super cold weather. To make things more difficult, she also says she doesn't want to live in the desert because she likes trees. She's a very traditional conservative Christian and needs a church and some Christian friends around. She's a nurse so she can find work anywhere, but she's also 70 and doesn't want to spend all her money on the move so she can retire.
2023.06.01 15:28 Althnertiv My parents: a novel. What is the solution to turbulent water under the bridge?
I love my mom. I guess. She really loves me Went all out as a mom. PTO president, troop leader, took me to after school stuff. Threw me fancy parties. Read me lots of books.Gave me lots of gifts. Give you the shirt off her back type of lady, for sure. Ran a six figure business until my teens! Then it went belly up. Ran it for 10 more years at a loss. I saw her lose a lot of people she loved, from senseless tragedy to old age. Now she is spending her retirement years taking care of her very wealthy older father who throws her tiny scraps of approval, infrequently. He needs help. He fell three years ago, probably shouldn't live alone, is 96, and can't even heat up food without help she's over there two days a week thats all she can apparently do in a week. I can't even come over and fix dinner to try and spend some time with them. Cracks open the first tall boy at 330, then it's a joint, another tall boy, another joint. Every day. I drink a bit more than I want (like three days a week), so I have a hard time judging her. My dad is almost 60 and still runs a remodeling business so he's tired but she's always like " no your dad is too tired for that" I try to get together for holidays and she's like "not unless you come clean my house!" Guys it's a disaster. Cat feces needs scraped off lineoleum. Nick nacks everywhere. Food sits out for months. I'm allergic to the house and get hives. I tried to be her housekeeper as a teen and I think it was the single most factor in destroying my mental health. She has enough dirty laundry in the house to fill the biggest U-Haul. "Wish you'd help me.clean out this closet!" It's a 4,000 square foot house piled to the brim. Dog pee on the carpets. I never had clean towels, never had toilet paper in my swanky bathroom with a marble jacuzzi tub (highlighting the weird dynamic). My stepbrothers room had a crunchy spilled soda pond I spent half a summer trying to fix when he moved out. He lived with us for one year. He was violent, on meth, brought home really scary people. custom built a bass system that was so loud we would all have to leave the house when he wouldn't turn it off. He got in huge physical fights with my dad over things like "time to go to school". So police came and went. He once jacked off on my bed and left the evidence I was 12 years old! He had verrrry noisy sex with his girlfriend all the time in the room across from me, and I'd like ask my parents to help but they wouldnt. They couldn't! He was a violent meth head! He also did weird shit to me when I was a kid, but I like thought that it made me special so I welcomed it. My parents were like "that's just normal kissing cousins stuff!" They would never let me donate any toys or get rid of things or help me clean, so I did start just tossing old crap into one of the guest rooms until it was waist high. (Dad would dig things out of the garbage and put them by my door to tell me it wasn't okay to throw out a messed up/ unwanted toy) so I spent another summer fixing that. I spent 5 hours a day doing housekeeping. They did pay me, minimum wage, which I used to buy all my back to school clothes at the end of the summer. It was just... Soul crushing. And lonely.. I was so lonely in summer. I stayed home while my mom and dad worked (the two step brothers only lived in the house for a year) so alone in the mess from 8-5 m-f then they come home, go smoke in their room, chat, and have a beer until 6.. my mom might fix dinner, might order something, might have oatmeal or something. Then they would watch TV in their room from 7 until they tucked me in at night. They sang me affectionate good night songs until 8th grade though?? Next, I was a moody antisocial teen who started experimenting with drugs so their solution was to keep me from getting in legal trouble by providing the pot themselves. They smoked lots of pot with me when I was a teen and while I'm 420 friendly I don't think smoking out your 15 y/o three to five times a day is healthy. My mom jokes about me knocking on their door "wake and bake!" Ew! I was suicidal, self harming, only loosely tethered to reality in my opinions about the supernatural and also super paranoid (psychotic, I was borderline psychotic, hence being diagnosed with borderline personality disorder in the mental institution (in name only and not officially on my dx sheer thanks to a savvy counselor who didn't want to stick a code on me for life)) I was having sex with like, everyone. Sneaking out all the times getting super messed up, and after they found me overdosed on the floor (week in a coma in the hospital) (child services talked to them and required institutionalization) they got me help, good help. Thank whatever God there is for Mr Eagle, my counselor who had the "how do you eat an elephan? Piece by piece. Mentality of breaking life down into manageable chunks. Dealing only with your own problems, and not busying yourself with things outside of your control as those are not your responsibility (will revisit this at the end) ( money bags grandpa paid for it, btw I spent some nice times as a younger with Grandpa and do have a special relationship with him but also it tense probably because of the way him and my.mom get on? Maybe I feel ashamed about not investing well in my twenties because we would pull money out since we had very little of it and needed things like a down payment on a house or a major car repair, or a hospital bill, maybe because he cheated on my grandma at like 82 and then she pretty much laid down and died? Maybe because I feel weird about myself and insecure and inadequate? I'm afraid I seem greedy around him too and don't want him to think I want money so I try to fake being more financialy good than I am. I'm not bad off tho, for a single income family where the hubs is a hardware store manager.. got about a years income saved and I think that's pretty dope rly ) Back to parents: both of them have this "don't make a mountain out of a molehill" dismissive, don't deal with your problems attitude to everything so like... I'm the complete opposite, kinda anal. And I can be mean and resentful. Now they are also very into Jesus and are disappointed that I'm not. I "led them to Christ" when I was a post suicidal teen looking for change. Their only change was that they were in church and hiding all their habits. My dad has a super close relationship to my ex sister in law and they talk all the time, he gave her a job, she had a hard life, now she loves God and they are like so close. I'm very sad about it. I do feel betrayed. It also hurt my brother, the okay one. He stayed away for a decade since the ex was always at our house or with my dad working. So then I started buying groceries in college when I had a job, and cooking for myself but my dad is too picky to eat anything I'd make. My mom only bought frozen and shelf stable things and I was pretty crunchy and wanted lots of fresh stuff to eat. Moving on, my mom is always complaining about her dad being so needy and won't pay for help, her sister is useless (mind you he just calls the sister fat, and talks a lot of shit to her, I wouldn't help either. I don't like to come around cuz he's kinda too old school with my kids) my mom is also in terrible health. She fell down the stairs several times now, drunk. She's had some surgeries. She smokes a ton and is always coughing. So here we are: Shes about to move in next door. Shes "excited for the first time in a long time" and I kind of am,but mostly? I'm worried. I have four kids, that she basically never helps with. She doesn't have to, they're my kids. I would appreciate her help but I'm afraid of her being too close to the kids.I don't want her in my business, I don't want my tween running over there everytime something is going on... like today our neighbors dog killed the cat, and if my mom lives there she would have seen the commotion.. I just don't want her having such a window into my life. I like to control what information she has. Everything she says drives me ducking nuts. She's always bragging about me like she shares in my accomplishments, and maybe she kinda does but I worked in college, she didn't help pay. I lived at home and paid my bills and bought my own food! When I did tell her about the cat her response bothered me. I regretted calling. I ALWAYS REGRET SHARING THINGS WITH HER. She tells all my secrets and portrays me in the same trashy podunk light she lives under. I don't really want to play best friends with her. Oh, I'm her "best friend" she's always so happy and proud to say I'm her "best friend" I'm not her best friend. I can barely stand her and while I did decide in the last year I was sick of being everyone's emotional trash can and I was at least going to share my grief too, so I do occasionally talk to her about my problems, I find everything she has to say so trite and so basic and so utterly uninformed and unhelpful. I need to spank the kids is always her answer (I was never spanked lol) She can't ever just be better, read a book, or do something healthy. She wants to eat drive through food and drink loads of bud light. Shes going to have all these health problems and I'm her "only one in the world" I do have a dad of course, who she trashed to me (from his work ethic, to my step brothers, to their sex life-apprently he's too horny!?! Wtf) so much in my teens I only recently have been able to even talk to.. he's also standoffish and thinks (slow southern drawl) "men are just quiet ain't no need to talk about everthing" Now she's telling me how she's going to be a brand new woman as my neighbor. Shes so happy! I want to be happy for her Shit I want her to babysit! I want family dinners. I want to like love each other. But I loathe her "good morning I love you!" Text every day She just doesn't get me. She does try to respect boundaries, but it's because I'm "over sensitive" and too emotional. . . I just don't know where to set boundaries.i don't want to be so judgemental because I'm so afraid I will not be any better as a parent đ I don't know what's worth talking about. I don't know how to appreciate the good mom I have who also has tons of irritating faults. She really would do anything for me if I asked. But I won't ask because I resent her! Or perhaps because she's already soooo burdened and she can't handle it. How do you move past your shit with your parents? Also she's like "you can't ever move now!" And like.. we definitely know we want to move eventually. Plus I don't want to take care of her problems. Like I get helping your old parents but goddamnit I had kids young because the church cult I joined myself to was very pro baby. It's the only thing we should do with our lives blah blah blah. I love being a mom and wife. I got married at 19. Kids at 21, so when I'm like 45.. I have no interest in taking care of my old parents who lived it up. I want to go to medical school or something dramatic in my later years. We always wanted to move abroad with our teens (me a nurse, hubs a teacher). IDK I'm just so irritated with her for her crappy parts and not sure how to still love her, which I want to, because my gosh I will be so sad when she's gone. I was always so afraid as a little kid of her dying. Nightmare after nightmare đI want to love her well but also be able to manage my own mental health and family. How do we do that?!?! Ps she just was given half a million dollars by my other grand parents to build a house. I live in a squatty (but lovely, my dad fixed it up nice for us, with ex sister in law, weird weird weird)two bedroom next door which I bought, (for a good price but bad foundation, had to replace roof, had to replace half the subfloors and some.joists from water damage) instead of another home because it was a childhood home for my dad, long in the family, and she was going to lose it in the bankruptcy. So I bought the house to save the house for the family. I have land. I do love my 2 bed 800 sf house.. but seeing her getting money and being "cracker rich" as she calls it, again, is.. ugh. They were also given the house I live in, for free. I bought it They were given it for free. I feel like I'm also viewed as this weak emotional spoiled girl by them all (parents, sil, brothers) too, which feels very unfitting(brothers have received gobs of bail money, surcharge money, probation fees, new cars when they totaled theirs) and like yes my grandpa once insisted on buying me a Buick for 5k which broke down constantly, needed the engine replaced, and I tried to tell him I didn't want (could afford a new car but it felt irresponsible to buy one when someone is trying to gift you a car... His name was on the note too so I couldn't even trade it in... Strings) and yes he once gave me 10k unsolicited đ€ gave my mom 30k and it sure disappeared. Mine did too tbh. Bought a patio to enclose to make more space. But I put myself through school, I worked the whole time, although at 14 it was housekeeping for my folks, I worked on a hotel in college, and as a nurse until I had my first baby. Sure I stay home but I can't afford daycare?! And I want to love the babies and created a better family. IDK. What the hell do I do from here? How do we make the family.. work?!?! What do I change? What do I accept that I can't change? Can I run away đ
submitted by Althnertiv to therapy [link] [comments]
2023.06.01 13:05 Responsible-Two-4979 PIP assessor for children? Childrenâs Nursing role
Hi, so I am currently a childrenâs nurse working in the NHS. I am so burned out and tired of this job after years of working, somewhere along the way I have just lost all passion and fire for the job. Iâm constantly in a state of anxiousness waiting to go in to work, I spend so much time in my head at work, counting down the days, hours until the next time Iâm due in. I struggle with anxiety and feel the more time is going on, the more my mind is rejecting being a bedside nurse any longer and my heart is just not in it.
Iâve seen a job through a private company for PIP assessments for children, this is a job for a childrenâs nurse. The pay seems excellent - more than I earn now -, there are no night shifts, no awkward house, I can work the same days as my husband so our days off are Iâm sync. Everything seemed really good, there are bonuses etc⊠until I looked at PIP assessor reviews online.
I have searched and the general consensus is that the pay is amazing and itâs sociable hours. However, to do this job you basically have to be ruthless and long story short, warp the assessment in a way that makes it seem as though the claimant isnât as bad as they make out; thus failing their opportunity to claim allowance. A lot of other reviews were that the deadlines are hard, you are strictly audited and that if you donât word the assessment in the way the bosses higher up want it wording, you get it sent back and have to re-do it, causing you to end up working more hours unpaid.
A lot of the reviews were off people who have experienced having a PIP assessment and seemed to think assessors were evil people. However, Iâm thinking surely as a childrenâs PIP assessor this wonât be the case? Please can anyone give me a little background on PIP assessments for children? Are they more likely to accepting their claim? Is it easier for a child to claim than an adult?
Iâve thought of other jobs but thereâs none right now that fit in with my schedule and interests. This would be working from home over the phone, Monday - Friday.
The company have received my CV and are awaiting my phone back, however Iâm putting it off until I know more. Please can anyone give me their honest opinions, I need as much help as I can get!
Thank you!
submitted by Responsible-Two-4979 to DWPhelp [link] [comments]
Iâve seen a job through a private company for PIP assessments for children, this is a job for a childrenâs nurse. The pay seems excellent - more than I earn now -, there are no night shifts, no awkward house, I can work the same days as my husband so our days off are Iâm sync. Everything seemed really good, there are bonuses etc⊠until I looked at PIP assessor reviews online.
I have searched and the general consensus is that the pay is amazing and itâs sociable hours. However, to do this job you basically have to be ruthless and long story short, warp the assessment in a way that makes it seem as though the claimant isnât as bad as they make out; thus failing their opportunity to claim allowance. A lot of other reviews were that the deadlines are hard, you are strictly audited and that if you donât word the assessment in the way the bosses higher up want it wording, you get it sent back and have to re-do it, causing you to end up working more hours unpaid.
A lot of the reviews were off people who have experienced having a PIP assessment and seemed to think assessors were evil people. However, Iâm thinking surely as a childrenâs PIP assessor this wonât be the case? Please can anyone give me a little background on PIP assessments for children? Are they more likely to accepting their claim? Is it easier for a child to claim than an adult?
Iâve thought of other jobs but thereâs none right now that fit in with my schedule and interests. This would be working from home over the phone, Monday - Friday.
The company have received my CV and are awaiting my phone back, however Iâm putting it off until I know more. Please can anyone give me their honest opinions, I need as much help as I can get!
Thank you!
2023.06.01 12:39 ToughAuthority1 I'm SO fed the fuck up with these pronatal dipshits calling childfree people "selfish"!
Even if they're only talking about "a certain group" of childfree people, it still implies parents could NEVER be selfish. If childfree people are so "selfish", then, they shouldn't even want us/them having kids, they should in their fuckin glories we/they aren't having them, right? Do they really think children deserve to have "selfish narcissists" for parents? It just proves they want us/them miserable more than they actually care about kids and then, they have the AUDACITY to accuse US of "kid loathing". Projection Much?
EVERY reason for being childfree (whether it's because, of genuine dislike of kids, climate change, more time, money, resources for yourself, wanting sleep, avoiding stretch marks, etc) is valid, self-aware, and, NOT selfish. What IS selfish is wanting more money for yourself, still having kids anyway, AND, refusing to buy them the basics or if they hated children, still had them anyway, and, then, mistreated them. At-least being childfree isn't selfish. Who exactly are childfree people being "selfish" towards? A non-existent child?
Examples of how parents COULD BE selfish
They only have/want kids, because, that's the "lifescript".
In other words, they're too stupid to think for themselves and they're jealous childfree people are smarter than them.
Bring their infants/toddlers/little kids to luxury restaurants, movie theaters (if it's isn't a kids movie), airplanes, etc
While I understand the airplane situation is controversial, but, AT THE VERY LEAST parents can do is apologize for any inconvenience their baby/kid causes and NOT get mad at the other passengers for being annoyed that their baby/kid won't shut the fuck up. Same thing with apartments/shared housing, which is also controversial.
They only want children, because, they want a "mini version of themselves".
That's selfish AF.
They only want children, because, they want to be taken care of when they're old.
Nursing homes exist for that reason. Even having children isn't a 100% guarantee they won't end up in a nursing home. While it's great if your children take care of you when you're old, but, kids are NOT future retirement plans, there's IRA's and 401K's for that.
Having children and making them "the village" problem.
While it's one thing to (unexpecting) become poor, sick, disabled, etc AFTER the child is already born, but, to intentionally become pregnant and have a baby KNOWING ahead of time you're not gonna be able to raise it and then count on a "village" to take care of it, then, fuck you.
Just because, they popped out some 7lb creampie, it doesn't automatically make them "heroes".
(I'm NOT referring to the parents who participate here or even prolife parents who do a CRAZY thing called MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS and let people live their lives free of judgement and harassment. I'm referring to the ones bitching on social media about people who are childfree, like go spend some times with your fuck trophies, instead of obsessing over people's sex lives so much, it's creepy and predatory)
submitted by ToughAuthority1 to ProlifeCircleJerk [link] [comments]
EVERY reason for being childfree (whether it's because, of genuine dislike of kids, climate change, more time, money, resources for yourself, wanting sleep, avoiding stretch marks, etc) is valid, self-aware, and, NOT selfish. What IS selfish is wanting more money for yourself, still having kids anyway, AND, refusing to buy them the basics or if they hated children, still had them anyway, and, then, mistreated them. At-least being childfree isn't selfish. Who exactly are childfree people being "selfish" towards? A non-existent child?
Examples of how parents COULD BE selfish
They only have/want kids, because, that's the "lifescript".
In other words, they're too stupid to think for themselves and they're jealous childfree people are smarter than them.
Bring their infants/toddlers/little kids to luxury restaurants, movie theaters (if it's isn't a kids movie), airplanes, etc
While I understand the airplane situation is controversial, but, AT THE VERY LEAST parents can do is apologize for any inconvenience their baby/kid causes and NOT get mad at the other passengers for being annoyed that their baby/kid won't shut the fuck up. Same thing with apartments/shared housing, which is also controversial.
They only want children, because, they want a "mini version of themselves".
That's selfish AF.
They only want children, because, they want to be taken care of when they're old.
Nursing homes exist for that reason. Even having children isn't a 100% guarantee they won't end up in a nursing home. While it's great if your children take care of you when you're old, but, kids are NOT future retirement plans, there's IRA's and 401K's for that.
Having children and making them "the village" problem.
While it's one thing to (unexpecting) become poor, sick, disabled, etc AFTER the child is already born, but, to intentionally become pregnant and have a baby KNOWING ahead of time you're not gonna be able to raise it and then count on a "village" to take care of it, then, fuck you.
Just because, they popped out some 7lb creampie, it doesn't automatically make them "heroes".
(I'm NOT referring to the parents who participate here or even prolife parents who do a CRAZY thing called MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS and let people live their lives free of judgement and harassment. I'm referring to the ones bitching on social media about people who are childfree, like go spend some times with your fuck trophies, instead of obsessing over people's sex lives so much, it's creepy and predatory)
2023.06.01 10:28 throwmeaway0987now AITA? husband lying about baby to avoid entertaining his parents
Throw away account here. Here's the situation : my inlaws are living in another state, 7h+ trip, where they moved away from any family 10 years ago to enjoy retirement. The trip is hard with kids (plane + car ride), and their house is not suited for us (we slept in a somewhat fancy garage, they're upstairs in their marble luxury home ; we would need to comply to their random eating hours, etc). They never bothered to come see their grandson in 6 years except once, when he was born. It was an unpleasant time as I was dealing with emergency c-section recovery, yet they demanded to be with us around the clock, prepare food, make small talk, etc. They could have come anytime since (no real money or health issue) and they didn't. We still went there once, despite the hard trip.
Pretty much no contact in between, except for Christmas gatherings. They never displayed any care for us.
Fast forward to now, I just gave birth to my 2nd kid. They are coming again. But they want their agenda to be followed, 24/7 with us to "make the most" of their 3 days here. They will stay at a nearby hotel as we don't have spare rooms. They are arriving in town at 7 pm, and want to come straight away to visit us. My husband said that it wasn't a good idea, as it's dinnebath/bedtime with exhausted kid + fussy newborn. They expect us to eat at their usual dinner time (10PM) and move our kids routine + forget our fatigue for them. I also nurse my newborn to sleep which is not an inlaws friendly scene.
We proposed 10AM the next day instead, they got mad and said it was a lot of money and effort for them to come (not true), they felt not welcomed and wondered if they should come at all.
Now for the annoying part: instead of saying that their plan is not suiting our needs, my husband thought it was a good idea to film our newborn crying, send the video to his mother and say "look at what I'm dealing with on the evening, please understand". Note that he takes care of the baby 1h30 / day, and I do the rest, including nights.
It straight up make it look 1000% worse than the reality. 2nd kid is a charm, yes she's fussy on the evening, but the reality is just that we don't want to add ourselves fatigue for people who are basically strangers to them and never made any effort.
Yet, I want my husband to be clear with them. Especially as he's the one insisting to not disturb our kids planning (tbh I'd make the effort if it was important to him). I mentioned that if the topic comes up, I will deny that she's as fussy as depicted. It makes me feel very sad for my newborn to be held guilty, instead of my grown ass husband facing his parents.
AITA for asking my husband to not lie, and just say that we're too tired to entertain them at night?
Edit: many thanks for all answers. Seems like I'm not too much of an AH, neither is my husband, and most of you consider it as a white lie to protect our family time and needs, vs their unreasonable demands. We're both coming from families with boundaries issues, and struggling sometimes to make the right calls / right answers. What seems important is that he was able to say no, even if eventually the inlaws might resent us as they found it not true, and we shouldn't think too much about it.
submitted by throwmeaway0987now to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]
Pretty much no contact in between, except for Christmas gatherings. They never displayed any care for us.
Fast forward to now, I just gave birth to my 2nd kid. They are coming again. But they want their agenda to be followed, 24/7 with us to "make the most" of their 3 days here. They will stay at a nearby hotel as we don't have spare rooms. They are arriving in town at 7 pm, and want to come straight away to visit us. My husband said that it wasn't a good idea, as it's dinnebath/bedtime with exhausted kid + fussy newborn. They expect us to eat at their usual dinner time (10PM) and move our kids routine + forget our fatigue for them. I also nurse my newborn to sleep which is not an inlaws friendly scene.
We proposed 10AM the next day instead, they got mad and said it was a lot of money and effort for them to come (not true), they felt not welcomed and wondered if they should come at all.
Now for the annoying part: instead of saying that their plan is not suiting our needs, my husband thought it was a good idea to film our newborn crying, send the video to his mother and say "look at what I'm dealing with on the evening, please understand". Note that he takes care of the baby 1h30 / day, and I do the rest, including nights.
It straight up make it look 1000% worse than the reality. 2nd kid is a charm, yes she's fussy on the evening, but the reality is just that we don't want to add ourselves fatigue for people who are basically strangers to them and never made any effort.
Yet, I want my husband to be clear with them. Especially as he's the one insisting to not disturb our kids planning (tbh I'd make the effort if it was important to him). I mentioned that if the topic comes up, I will deny that she's as fussy as depicted. It makes me feel very sad for my newborn to be held guilty, instead of my grown ass husband facing his parents.
AITA for asking my husband to not lie, and just say that we're too tired to entertain them at night?
Edit: many thanks for all answers. Seems like I'm not too much of an AH, neither is my husband, and most of you consider it as a white lie to protect our family time and needs, vs their unreasonable demands. We're both coming from families with boundaries issues, and struggling sometimes to make the right calls / right answers. What seems important is that he was able to say no, even if eventually the inlaws might resent us as they found it not true, and we shouldn't think too much about it.