Bluewater boathouse seafood grill photos

Austin, without the toxicity

2017.03.19 01:34 Texas4E Austin, without the toxicity

The Austin subreddit that isn't toxic.
[link]


2023.06.03 21:54 Ms_Digglesworth Korean BBQ with Seafood Allergies

Hi everyone, so recently a friend invited me to a Korean BBQ restaurant, however, I turned down the invitation because after seeing how everyone cooks their food on the same grill, cross contact came to mind. I can't eat any seafood or shellfish, and so it seems like to keep the grill safe for me, nobody at the table would be able to order it, and so it would sort of put a damper on the group.
Has anyone run into a similar situation? And how did it turn out/what did you do? It seems to me that it just isn't doable, but I wanted to hear others' experiences or see if maybe there is some workaround I haven't considered. I'm not that invested in being able to do it, so it's not the end of the world if it's out of the question.
submitted by Ms_Digglesworth to FoodAllergies [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 17:41 InnateJ Gave the old girl a wash today - the car I mean

Gave the old girl a wash today - the car I mean
Gave the car a wash today and thought I’d share. 2014 F33 435i. I’ve had the car for 6 years and I still love it the same (if not more) as the day I picked it up. I’ve included a photo of the stock car too for those interested ✌️fully prepared for the “I prefer it stock” comments, but I purchased the car with this vision in mind, so I never intended on keeping it stock.
Estoril blue, gloss black grilles, m sport side skirts, rear diffuser, spoiler and accent pieces. Riger front lip. M performance exhaust with carbon tips. Tinted windows all round, fronts are light though - headlights tinted to match. Wheels are 403M painted metallic graphite (3 are currently kerbed 😩 but getting them sorted soon). I’ve recently fitted the GTS tail lights which look great, didn’t have them on for these photos though. I’ve also got the 6WB digital cluster which really helped update the interior. Performance wise, only a stage 1 map with an upgraded Masata charge pipe and a MST cold air intake. I felt the extra weight from the convertible roof needed a few more horses to compensate and it’s perfect now - plus the cold air intake noise never gets old 😂
submitted by InnateJ to BMW [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 03:19 Itchy-Audience-291 Advice before cutting in-wall and in ceiling

Advice before cutting in-wall and in ceiling
Hi, I’m currently working on setting up my home theatre and would like some reassurance of my plan before cutting the speakers into the wall/ceiling. I was gifted some hand me downs from a friend who upgraded.
Receiver is a Marantz NR1711 this will be mounted behind the Murphy door in attached pictures.
Setting up for 5.1.2
All speakers are Definitive Tech except for sub. Left and Right Speakers are DI6.5S. Center is a DT6.5STR( I know it’s slightly off center I plan to use a rectangular grille to hide that aesthetically)
In ceiling Atmos speakers I plan on mounting at locations with red Xs they are DT6.5R
Rear surround left and right are DI8R.
Sub is a mini me earthquake.
Primary use will be movies, gaming but also music. Seating will be a row of 4 theater style chairs.
I’ve done a fair amount of research but wanted to run my plan with photos of the space here for opinions/concerns before cutting the holes.
submitted by Itchy-Audience-291 to hometheater [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 00:55 rew777666 Fish market in or near Dennis?

Hello,
I will be taking a vacation in Dennis in 2 weeks and was wondering if their was a recommended fresh fish market or monger near by? I will have access to a kitchen and grill and would like to prepare some of my own meals with fresh seafood.
Thank you!
submitted by rew777666 to CapeCod [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 00:51 starshiplibrarian Is there a wheat-free food that is similar in appearance to the Fancy Feast grilled varieties?

I adopted two one-year-old cats from a rescue a few weeks after the cat I'd had for nearly 19 years died. They had been eating a Purina One dry food and had been eating the Fancy Feast grilled variety of chicken, beef, turkey, and seafood that has the appearance consistency of flakes in gravy. I've had cats since I was a young child and have never had an issue transitioning cats' food before.
The two sisters had been in a kitten room at a vet hospital for some number of months before "aging out" due to being a bit skittish, and then they were placed into a foster for somewhere between 4 and 5 months, so they got really used to their foster guardian. I brought them home the first Saturday of May — it's been a bit over three weeks.
While Fancy Feast and Purina are OK nutrition-wise, one of the main ingredients of most Purina/Fancy Feast lines is wheat gluten ... I'm guessing for protein. I've had to feed them on disposable plates because I can't handle gluten (I vomit and get diarrhea) — I can't clean plates in proximity to the dishes I use to eat without risking cross-contamination, and I'm in an apartment, so ... yeah. But I don't want it to be like this because disposables are wasteful. I never imagined I'd ever have this much of a challenge switching cats' food.
I transitioned their dry food easily. They like a grain-free Purina for that, in addition to Cat Person and another wheat-free dry food brand. One of them — the chonkier sister — has also been easier to transition to a different wet food and has found some favorites in a few brands. The petite sister has been a struggle. She will not eat any wet food other than the Fancy Feast, and I really don't want to keep having to buy disposable plates. Admittedly, she seems to like dry food more than wet food in general.
So:
  1. Is there a wheat/rye/barley-free alternative to what she is currently eating that has a similar texture? I'm OK if it has other grains in it (like rice or corn) or if it has tuber starches (like potatoes) — I'm not picky about grain-free. I've tried a few options (Cat Person, the Petco store brand, and a few others ... I basically got everything at Petco that seemed like it might have a similar texture from the product photos) and she won't even eat it when I mix a small amount of it in with the Fancy Feast like all of the transition advice suggests. I haven't tried the Blue Buffalo Tastefuls line yet, which might be my next attempt, but buying food that she won't eat is starting to get expensive.
  2. Since she likes dry so much, instead of starting with the Fancy Feast, I'm wondering if it might be a good idea to start her with dry food and just add a new wet food to it in increments?
Any advice on how to proceed with this is welcome so I can stop using disposable plates.
submitted by starshiplibrarian to CatAdvice [link] [comments]


2023.06.03 00:50 emiemithegreat Hello everyone! I am going to a ramen place tomorrow, and I know that ramen is VERY high calorie. Can anyone give me the lowest calorie ramen option out all of these? Also, any adjustments I can make to make the bowl lower calorie? I appreciate it so much!

This photo was taken from yelp :) there is also a menu of rice entrees, if anyone could give me the lowest calorie option from there that would be amazing as well.
submitted by emiemithegreat to caloriecount [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 23:14 Piano_Away 35 [M4R] Texas - Has to be a dorky/goofy/nerdy woman here

I apologize as it's a bit of a novel and doesn't quite make grammatical sense in some spots. I can read goodly now and again lol. The reason it says M4R is because I mainly like women and trans women but I also like a very very very specific type of guy and certain trans men as I'm partially bi. Chances are you aren't that type but feel free to ask if you are. (Didn’t want to offend anyone so I’d rather say in private) Just throwing that out there as it's a deal breaker for most women. Which why would it be? The number one reason I get is I'm going to cheat on them with a guy. As if being bi has any bearing on cheating and not the persons character.
I'm a 35 year old guy living in the middle-ish of Texas looking for a female partner. Partner as in LTR. That's Long Term Relationship meaning boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands type of stuff. You know, adult things? I had someone comment I was too vague so this is me being specific. I'm gonna be honest and kinda sad so bare with me.
So I spent New Years alone (I realize it's June lol but I have yet to meet someone and I think the story is still somewhat relevant). Rang in the New Year in bed staring at the ceiling listening to fireworks go off into the night. The next day I cried randomly while browsing for a movie to watch on TV. At first I didn't know why as I'm not much of a crier but I realized for the first time that I genuinely felt alone. I have no partner, no family that I speak to, no friends just acquaintances, really no one there for me. That's my own doing which took years to accomplish through me being closed off and just shutting people out, so I figure it might take just as long to fix. I'm not complaining as I got myself into this predicament. It's gonna sound dumb but I wanted a New Years kiss. I'd never had one and it seemed like a fun dumb silly thing to do. Eh maybe one day. Ok well back to my spiel. (I'm not depressed or anything or wanting attention) Some of my hobbies and interests are movies, reading, cooking, kayaking, records, video games, board games, snorkeling, bowling, swimming, escape rooms, puzzles and antiquing. I would describe myself as more goofy and dorky than nerdy. I like to go out and do fun things but also stay in and cuddle and relax. I guess it depends on my mood and the weather. I prefer the cold and would love to live in a state with actual seasons and snow. I'm 5'10, stocky AKA fat and open for adventure and new experiences.
Here are some random facts about me:
Some of my favorite bands are: The Black Keys, Kings of Leon, The Beatles, Creedence Clearwater Revival and The White Stripes.
Christmas is my favorite holiday, mainly because of the cold and festive activities.
I come from a medium-ish family.
I'm exceptionally patient but every person has a breaking point lol
I like traveling a lot. It's a basic thing that lots of people like. But I've found lots of people hate to leave their house, town or state so if that's you we probably might not be a good match. I also enjoy the mountains. But I don't like roughing it (give me that sweet AC in the summer). Hiking is so hard on my knees and I haven't done it in a while that if I were to I think about doing it I'd about die or twist a kankle.
I don't eat seafood, mushrooms, artichokes or pineapple on pizza (Who cares about this? Doesn't mean I won't go to a restaurant with you that has these things)
Never went to college as I'm horrible in a classroom setting and at taking tests.
Have probably the most boring job imaginable (Ask me about it)
Overweight but trying to work on it and make better choices (Get healthier and lose weight together maybe?)
Non religious but no issue with what you believe. (If anything)
Looking into sterilization. If you are already maybe you can give me some info or tips?
My own red flags 🚩
I work too much and oftentimes can't talk.
I send selfies often. I'm a visual person and like receiving photos. Apparently it's a generational thing. Hopefully you think pictures are neat as well? Is it really that weird to want to see you and your life and show you mine?
I sometimes speedily become attached to people, not in a weird way, but if I like you and we have some kind of connection, I will enjoy talking to you and want to do it often.
I'm a very organized person and will plan out pretty much anything from a vacation to a road trip to a birthday. This makes being with a go with the flow type of person hard at times I've learned but still very much doable.
Due to childhood trauma I'm secretive which can be annoying.
MY own "HELL YES" 🏁
I know how to cook.
I will always drive if you want. (Within reason)
Great at escape rooms and jigsaw puzzles.
Can read a map.
Decent at reading backwards upside down writing.
What I'm looking for:
Is my age or older. But I'm willing to go quite a bit lower if you are neat and we have stuff in common. But super young isn't my goal here.
Mature, considerate, responsible and funny (Dorky wouldn't hurt)
Someone who never cheats, honesty and trust are important to me.
Someone who is open-minded, willing to try new things, be adventurous, funny and nerdy.
Someone who believes in sharing household chores equally because we are both adults.
Be open and frank about issues you or I are having. Not pushy or jealous. Won't yell or argue about stupid things, I've had enough of that.
Willing to push me to become a better version of myself (Can you turn me into Batman?)
If this sounds like you then feel free to reach out and say hi or challenge me to a game of Scrabble/Pictionary/hand to hand combat maybe? Maybe Wordle or some online vidya game?
P.S. I realize my post isn't for everyone but if your seeing red flags from my post then I'd say trust your gut and please don't message me as we probably aren't compatible. I honestly don't mean that in a mean or hurtful way. I've just been messaged quite often with women saying they pushed aside red flags to get to know me. Please don't, it never ends well and you end up wasting both of our time. Wouldn't you rather spend it finding your person with no flags?
submitted by Piano_Away to r4r [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 23:12 Piano_Away 35 [M4R] Texas - Wanna not have kids together?

I apologize as it's a bit of a novel and doesn't quite make grammatical sense in some spots. I can read goodly now and again lol. The reason it says M4R is because I mainly like women and trans women but I also like a very very very specific type of guy and certain trans men as I'm partially bi. Chances are you aren't that type but feel free to ask if you are. (Didn’t want to offend anyone so I’d rather say in private) Just throwing that out there as it's a deal breaker for most women. Which why would it be? The number one reason I get is I'm going to cheat on them with a guy. As if being bi has any bearing on cheating and not the persons character.
I'm a 35 year old guy living in the middle-ish of Texas looking for a female partner. Partner as in LTR. That's Long Term Relationship meaning boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands type of stuff. You know, adult things? I had someone comment I was too vague so this is me being specific. I'm gonna be honest and kinda sad so bare with me.
So I spent New Years alone (I realize it's June lol but I have yet to meet someone and I think the story is still somewhat relevant). Rang in the New Year in bed staring at the ceiling listening to fireworks go off into the night. The next day I cried randomly while browsing for a movie to watch on TV. At first I didn't know why as I'm not much of a crier but I realized for the first time that I genuinely felt alone. I have no partner, no family that I speak to, no friends just acquaintances, really no one there for me. That's my own doing which took years to accomplish through me being closed off and just shutting people out, so I figure it might take just as long to fix. I'm not complaining as I got myself into this predicament. It's gonna sound dumb but I wanted a New Years kiss. I'd never had one and it seemed like a fun dumb silly thing to do. Eh maybe one day. Ok well back to my spiel. (I'm not depressed or anything or wanting attention) Some of my hobbies and interests are movies, reading, cooking, kayaking, records, video games, board games, snorkeling, bowling, swimming, escape rooms, puzzles and antiquing. I would describe myself as more goofy and dorky than nerdy. I like to go out and do fun things but also stay in and cuddle and relax. I guess it depends on my mood and the weather. I prefer the cold and would love to live in a state with actual seasons and snow. I'm 5'10, stocky AKA fat and open for adventure and new experiences.
Here are some random facts about me:
Some of my favorite bands are: The Black Keys, Kings of Leon, The Beatles, Creedence Clearwater Revival and The White Stripes.
Christmas is my favorite holiday, mainly because of the cold and festive activities.
I come from a medium-ish family.
I'm exceptionally patient but every person has a breaking point lol
I like traveling a lot. It's a basic thing that lots of people like. But I've found lots of people hate to leave their house, town or state so if that's you we probably might not be a good match. I also enjoy the mountains. But I don't like roughing it (give me that sweet AC in the summer). Hiking is so hard on my knees and I haven't done it in a while that if I were to I think about doing it I'd about die or twist a kankle.
I don't eat seafood, mushrooms, artichokes or pineapple on pizza (Who cares about this? Doesn't mean I won't go to a restaurant with you that has these things)
Never went to college as I'm horrible in a classroom setting and at taking tests.
Have probably the most boring job imaginable (Ask me about it)
Overweight but trying to work on it and make better choices (Get healthier and lose weight together maybe?)
Non religious but no issue with what you believe. (If anything)
Looking into sterilization. If you are already maybe you can give me some info or tips?
My own red flags 🚩
I work too much and oftentimes can't talk.
I send selfies often. I'm a visual person and like receiving photos. Apparently it's a generational thing. Hopefully you think pictures are neat as well? Is it really that weird to want to see you and your life and show you mine?
I sometimes speedily become attached to people, not in a weird way, but if I like you and we have some kind of connection, I will enjoy talking to you and want to do it often.
I'm a very organized person and will plan out pretty much anything from a vacation to a road trip to a birthday. This makes being with a go with the flow type of person hard at times I've learned but still very much doable.
Due to childhood trauma I'm secretive which can be annoying.
MY own "HELL YES" 🏁
I know how to cook.
I will always drive if you want. (Within reason)
Great at escape rooms and jigsaw puzzles.
Can read a map.
Decent at reading backwards upside down writing.
What I'm looking for:
Is my age or older. But I'm willing to go quite a bit lower if you are neat and we have stuff in common. But super young isn't my goal here.
Mature, considerate, responsible and funny (Dorky wouldn't hurt)
Someone who never cheats, honesty and trust are important to me.
Someone who is open-minded, willing to try new things, be adventurous, funny and nerdy.
Someone who believes in sharing household chores equally because we are both adults.
Be open and frank about issues you or I are having. Not pushy or jealous. Won't yell or argue about stupid things, I've had enough of that.
Willing to push me to become a better version of myself (Can you turn me into Batman?)
If this sounds like you then feel free to reach out and say hi or challenge me to a game of Scrabble/Pictionary/hand to hand combat maybe? Maybe Wordle or some online vidya game?
P.S. I realize my post isn't for everyone but if your seeing red flags from my post then I'd say trust your gut and please don't message me as we probably aren't compatible. I honestly don't mean that in a mean or hurtful way. I've just been messaged quite often with women saying they pushed aside red flags to get to know me. Please don't, it never ends well and you end up wasting both of our time. Wouldn't you rather spend it finding your person with no flags?
submitted by Piano_Away to cf4cf [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 23:03 Piano_Away 35 [M4R] #Texas - Want to spend the summer together in a LTR?

I apologize as it's a bit of a novel and doesn't quite make grammatical sense in some spots. I can read goodly now and again lol. The reason it says M4R is because I mainly like women and trans women but I also like a very very very specific type of guy and certain trans men as I'm partially bi. Chances are you aren't that type but feel free to ask if you are. (Didn’t want to offend anyone so I’d rather say in private) Just throwing that out there as it's a deal breaker for most women. Which why would it be? The number one reason I get is I'm going to cheat on them with a guy. As if being bi has any bearing on cheating and not the persons character.
I'm a 35 year old guy living in the middle-ish of Texas looking for a female partner. Partner as in LTR. That's Long Term Relationship meaning boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands type of stuff. You know, adult things? I had someone comment I was too vague so this is me being specific. I'm gonna be honest and kinda sad so bare with me.
So I spent New Years alone (I realize it's June lol but I have yet to meet someone and I think the story is still somewhat relevant). Rang in the New Year in bed staring at the ceiling listening to fireworks go off into the night. The next day I cried randomly while browsing for a movie to watch on TV. At first I didn't know why as I'm not much of a crier but I realized for the first time that I genuinely felt alone. I have no partner, no family that I speak to, no friends just acquaintances, really no one there for me. That's my own doing which took years to accomplish through me being closed off and just shutting people out, so I figure it might take just as long to fix. I'm not complaining as I got myself into this predicament. It's gonna sound dumb but I wanted a New Years kiss. I'd never had one and it seemed like a fun dumb silly thing to do. Eh maybe one day. Ok well back to my spiel. (I'm not depressed or anything or wanting attention) Some of my hobbies and interests are movies, reading, cooking, kayaking, records, video games, board games, snorkeling, bowling, swimming, escape rooms, puzzles and antiquing. I would describe myself as more goofy and dorky than nerdy. I like to go out and do fun things but also stay in and cuddle and relax. I guess it depends on my mood and the weather. I prefer the cold and would love to live in a state with actual seasons and snow. I'm 5'10, stocky AKA fat and open for adventure and new experiences.
Here are some random facts about me:
Some of my favorite bands are: The Black Keys, Kings of Leon, The Beatles, Creedence Clearwater Revival and The White Stripes.
Christmas is my favorite holiday, mainly because of the cold and festive activities.
I come from a medium-ish family.
I'm exceptionally patient but every person has a breaking point lol
I like traveling a lot. It's a basic thing that lots of people like. But I've found lots of people hate to leave their house, town or state so if that's you we probably might not be a good match. I also enjoy the mountains. But I don't like roughing it (give me that sweet AC in the summer). Hiking is so hard on my knees and I haven't done it in a while that if I were to I think about doing it I'd about die or twist a kankle.
I don't eat seafood, mushrooms, artichokes or pineapple on pizza (Who cares about this? Doesn't mean I won't go to a restaurant with you that has these things)
Never went to college as I'm horrible in a classroom setting and at taking tests.
Have probably the most boring job imaginable (Ask me about it)
Overweight but trying to work on it and make better choices (Get healthier and lose weight together maybe?)
Non religious but no issue with what you believe. (If anything)
Looking into sterilization. If you are already maybe you can give me some info or tips?
My own red flags 🚩
I work too much and oftentimes can't talk.
I send selfies often. I'm a visual person and like receiving photos. Apparently it's a generational thing. Hopefully you think pictures are neat as well? Is it really that weird to want to see you and your life and show you mine?
I sometimes speedily become attached to people, not in a weird way, but if I like you and we have some kind of connection, I will enjoy talking to you and want to do it often.
I'm a very organized person and will plan out pretty much anything from a vacation to a road trip to a birthday. This makes being with a go with the flow type of person hard at times I've learned but still very much doable.
Due to childhood trauma I'm secretive which can be annoying.
MY own "HELL YES" 🏁
I know how to cook.
I will always drive if you want. (Within reason)
Great at escape rooms and jigsaw puzzles.
Can read a map.
Decent at reading backwards upside down writing.
What I'm looking for:
Is my age or older. But I'm willing to go quite a bit lower if you are neat and we have stuff in common. But super young isn't my goal here.
Mature, considerate, responsible and funny (Dorky wouldn't hurt)
Someone who never cheats, honesty and trust are important to me.
Someone who is open-minded, willing to try new things, be adventurous, funny and nerdy.
Someone who believes in sharing household chores equally because we are both adults.
Be open and frank about issues you or I are having. Not pushy or jealous. Won't yell or argue about stupid things, I've had enough of that.
Willing to push me to become a better version of myself (Can you turn me into Batman?)
If this sounds like you then feel free to reach out and say hi or challenge me to a game of Scrabble/Pictionary/hand to hand combat maybe? Maybe Wordle or some online vidya game?
P.S. I realize my post isn't for everyone but if your seeing red flags from my post then I'd say trust your gut and please don't message me as we probably aren't compatible. I honestly don't mean that in a mean or hurtful way. I've just been messaged quite often with women saying they pushed aside red flags to get to know me. Please don't, it never ends well and you end up wasting both of our time. Wouldn't you rather spend it finding your person with no flags?
submitted by Piano_Away to AgeGapPersonals [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 23:01 Piano_Away 35 [M4R] Texas - Maybe we'll think we're both neat?

I apologize as it's a bit of a novel and doesn't quite make grammatical sense in some spots. I can read goodly now and again lol. The reason it says M4R is because I mainly like women and trans women but I also like a very very very specific type of guy and certain trans men as I'm partially bi. Chances are you aren't that type but feel free to ask if you are. (Didn’t want to offend anyone so I’d rather say in private) Just throwing that out there as it's a deal breaker for most women. Which why would it be? The number one reason I get is I'm going to cheat on them with a guy. As if being bi has any bearing on cheating and not the persons character.
I'm a 35 year old guy living in the middle-ish of Texas looking for a female partner. Partner as in LTR. That's Long Term Relationship meaning boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands type of stuff. You know, adult things? I had someone comment I was too vague so this is me being specific. I'm gonna be honest and kinda sad so bare with me.
So I spent New Years alone (I realize it's June lol but I have yet to meet someone and I think the story is still somewhat relevant). Rang in the New Year in bed staring at the ceiling listening to fireworks go off into the night. The next day I cried randomly while browsing for a movie to watch on TV. At first I didn't know why as I'm not much of a crier but I realized for the first time that I genuinely felt alone. I have no partner, no family that I speak to, no friends just acquaintances, really no one there for me. That's my own doing which took years to accomplish through me being closed off and just shutting people out, so I figure it might take just as long to fix. I'm not complaining as I got myself into this predicament. It's gonna sound dumb but I wanted a New Years kiss. I'd never had one and it seemed like a fun dumb silly thing to do. Eh maybe one day. Ok well back to my spiel. (I'm not depressed or anything or wanting attention) Some of my hobbies and interests are movies, reading, cooking, kayaking, records, video games, board games, snorkeling, bowling, swimming, escape rooms, puzzles and antiquing. I would describe myself as more goofy and dorky than nerdy. I like to go out and do fun things but also stay in and cuddle and relax. I guess it depends on my mood and the weather. I prefer the cold and would love to live in a state with actual seasons and snow. I'm 5'10, stocky AKA fat and open for adventure and new experiences.
Here are some random facts about me:
Some of my favorite bands are: The Black Keys, Kings of Leon, The Beatles, Creedence Clearwater Revival and The White Stripes.
Christmas is my favorite holiday, mainly because of the cold and festive activities.
I come from a medium-ish family.
I'm exceptionally patient but every person has a breaking point lol
I like traveling a lot. It's a basic thing that lots of people like. But I've found lots of people hate to leave their house, town or state so if that's you we probably might not be a good match. I also enjoy the mountains. But I don't like roughing it (give me that sweet AC in the summer). Hiking is so hard on my knees and I haven't done it in a while that if I were to I think about doing it I'd about die or twist a kankle.
I don't eat seafood, mushrooms, artichokes or pineapple on pizza (Who cares about this? Doesn't mean I won't go to a restaurant with you that has these things)
Never went to college as I'm horrible in a classroom setting and at taking tests.
Have probably the most boring job imaginable (Ask me about it)
Overweight but trying to work on it and make better choices (Get healthier and lose weight together maybe?)
Non religious but no issue with what you believe. (If anything)
Looking into sterilization. If you are already maybe you can give me some info or tips?
My own red flags 🚩
I work too much and oftentimes can't talk.
I send selfies often. I'm a visual person and like receiving photos. Apparently it's a generational thing. Hopefully you think pictures are neat as well? Is it really that weird to want to see you and your life and show you mine?
I sometimes speedily become attached to people, not in a weird way, but if I like you and we have some kind of connection, I will enjoy talking to you and want to do it often.
I'm a very organized person and will plan out pretty much anything from a vacation to a road trip to a birthday. This makes being with a go with the flow type of person hard at times I've learned but still very much doable.
Due to childhood trauma I'm secretive which can be annoying.
MY own "HELL YES" 🏁
I know how to cook.
I will always drive if you want. (Within reason)
Great at escape rooms and jigsaw puzzles.
Can read a map.
Decent at reading backwards upside down writing.
What I'm looking for:
Is my age or older. But I'm willing to go quite a bit lower if you are neat and we have stuff in common. But super young isn't my goal here.
Mature, considerate, responsible and funny (Dorky wouldn't hurt)
Someone who never cheats, honesty and trust are important to me.
Someone who is open-minded, willing to try new things, be adventurous, funny and nerdy.
Someone who believes in sharing household chores equally because we are both adults.
Be open and frank about issues you or I are having. Not pushy or jealous. Won't yell or argue about stupid things, I've had enough of that.
Willing to push me to become a better version of myself (Can you turn me into Batman?)
If this sounds like you then feel free to reach out and say hi or challenge me to a game of Scrabble/Pictionary/hand to hand combat maybe? Maybe Wordle or some online vidya game?
P.S. I realize my post isn't for everyone but if your seeing red flags from my post then I'd say trust your gut and please don't message me as we probably aren't compatible. I honestly don't mean that in a mean or hurtful way. I've just been messaged quite often with women saying they pushed aside red flags to get to know me. Please don't, it never ends well and you end up wasting both of our time. Wouldn't you rather spend it finding your person with no flags?
submitted by Piano_Away to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 22:59 Piano_Away 35 [M4R] Texas - Love to get to know you

I apologize as it's a bit of a novel and doesn't quite make grammatical sense in some spots. I can read goodly now and again lol. The reason it says M4R is because I mainly like women and trans women but I also like a very very very specific type of guy and certain trans men as I'm partially bi. Chances are you aren't that type but feel free to ask if you are. (Didn’t want to offend anyone so I’d rather say in private) Just throwing that out there as it's a deal breaker for most women. Which why would it be? The number one reason I get is I'm going to cheat on them with a guy. As if being bi has any bearing on cheating and not the persons character.
I'm a 35 year old guy living in the middle-ish of Texas looking for a female partner. Partner as in LTR. That's Long Term Relationship meaning boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands type of stuff. You know, adult things? I had someone comment I was too vague so this is me being specific. I'm gonna be honest and kinda sad so bare with me.
So I spent New Years alone (I realize it's June lol but I have yet to meet someone and I think the story is still somewhat relevant). Rang in the New Year in bed staring at the ceiling listening to fireworks go off into the night. The next day I cried randomly while browsing for a movie to watch on TV. At first I didn't know why as I'm not much of a crier but I realized for the first time that I genuinely felt alone. I have no partner, no family that I speak to, no friends just acquaintances, really no one there for me. That's my own doing which took years to accomplish through me being closed off and just shutting people out, so I figure it might take just as long to fix. I'm not complaining as I got myself into this predicament. It's gonna sound dumb but I wanted a New Years kiss. I'd never had one and it seemed like a fun dumb silly thing to do. Eh maybe one day. Ok well back to my spiel. (I'm not depressed or anything or wanting attention) Some of my hobbies and interests are movies, reading, cooking, kayaking, records, video games, board games, snorkeling, bowling, swimming, escape rooms, puzzles and antiquing. I would describe myself as more goofy and dorky than nerdy. I like to go out and do fun things but also stay in and cuddle and relax. I guess it depends on my mood and the weather. I prefer the cold and would love to live in a state with actual seasons and snow. I'm 5'10, stocky AKA fat and open for adventure and new experiences.
Here are some random facts about me:
Some of my favorite bands are: The Black Keys, Kings of Leon, The Beatles, Creedence Clearwater Revival and The White Stripes.
Christmas is my favorite holiday, mainly because of the cold and festive activities.
I come from a medium-ish family.
I'm exceptionally patient but every person has a breaking point lol
I like traveling a lot. It's a basic thing that lots of people like. But I've found lots of people hate to leave their house, town or state so if that's you we probably might not be a good match. I also enjoy the mountains. But I don't like roughing it (give me that sweet AC in the summer). Hiking is so hard on my knees and I haven't done it in a while that if I were to I think about doing it I'd about die or twist a kankle.
I don't eat seafood, mushrooms, artichokes or pineapple on pizza (Who cares about this? Doesn't mean I won't go to a restaurant with you that has these things)
Never went to college as I'm horrible in a classroom setting and at taking tests.
Have probably the most boring job imaginable (Ask me about it)
Overweight but trying to work on it and make better choices (Get healthier and lose weight together maybe?)
Non religious but no issue with what you believe. (If anything)
Looking into sterilization. If you are already maybe you can give me some info or tips?
My own red flags 🚩
I work too much and oftentimes can't talk.
I send selfies often. I'm a visual person and like receiving photos. Apparently it's a generational thing. Hopefully you think pictures are neat as well? Is it really that weird to want to see you and your life and show you mine?
I sometimes speedily become attached to people, not in a weird way, but if I like you and we have some kind of connection, I will enjoy talking to you and want to do it often.
I'm a very organized person and will plan out pretty much anything from a vacation to a road trip to a birthday. This makes being with a go with the flow type of person hard at times I've learned but still very much doable.
Due to childhood trauma I'm secretive which can be annoying.
MY own "HELL YES" 🏁
I know how to cook.
I will always drive if you want. (Within reason)
Great at escape rooms and jigsaw puzzles.
Can read a map.
Decent at reading backwards upside down writing.
What I'm looking for:
Is my age or older. But I'm willing to go quite a bit lower if you are neat and we have stuff in common. But super young isn't my goal here.
Mature, considerate, responsible and funny (Dorky wouldn't hurt)
Someone who never cheats, honesty and trust are important to me.
Someone who is open-minded, willing to try new things, be adventurous, funny and nerdy.
Someone who believes in sharing household chores equally because we are both adults.
Be open and frank about issues you or I are having. Not pushy or jealous. Won't yell or argue about stupid things, I've had enough of that.
Willing to push me to become a better version of myself (Can you turn me into Batman?)
If this sounds like you then feel free to reach out and say hi or challenge me to a game of Scrabble/Pictionary/hand to hand combat maybe? Maybe Wordle or some online vidya game?
P.S. I realize my post isn't for everyone but if your seeing red flags from my post then I'd say trust your gut and please don't message me as we probably aren't compatible. I honestly don't mean that in a mean or hurtful way. I've just been messaged quite often with women saying they pushed aside red flags to get to know me. Please don't, it never ends well and you end up wasting both of our time. Wouldn't you rather spend it finding your person with no flags?
submitted by Piano_Away to R4R40Plus [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 22:56 Piano_Away 35 [M4R] Texas - What adventures can we come up with?

I apologize as it's a bit of a novel and doesn't quite make grammatical sense in some spots. I can read goodly now and again lol. The reason it says M4R is because I mainly like women and trans women but I also like a very very very specific type of guy and certain trans men as I'm partially bi. Chances are you aren't that type but feel free to ask if you are. (Didn’t want to offend anyone so I’d rather say in private) Just throwing that out there as it's a deal breaker for most women. Which why would it be? The number one reason I get is I'm going to cheat on them with a guy. As if being bi has any bearing on cheating and not the persons character.
I'm a 35 year old guy living in the middle-ish of Texas looking for a female partner. Partner as in LTR. That's Long Term Relationship meaning boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands type of stuff. You know, adult things? I had someone comment I was too vague so this is me being specific. I'm gonna be honest and kinda sad so bare with me.
So I spent New Years alone (I realize it's June lol but I have yet to meet someone and I think the story is still somewhat relevant). Rang in the New Year in bed staring at the ceiling listening to fireworks go off into the night. The next day I cried randomly while browsing for a movie to watch on TV. At first I didn't know why as I'm not much of a crier but I realized for the first time that I genuinely felt alone. I have no partner, no family that I speak to, no friends just acquaintances, really no one there for me. That's my own doing which took years to accomplish through me being closed off and just shutting people out, so I figure it might take just as long to fix. I'm not complaining as I got myself into this predicament. It's gonna sound dumb but I wanted a New Years kiss. I'd never had one and it seemed like a fun dumb silly thing to do. Eh maybe one day. Ok well back to my spiel. (I'm not depressed or anything or wanting attention) Some of my hobbies and interests are movies, reading, cooking, kayaking, records, video games, board games, snorkeling, bowling, swimming, escape rooms, puzzles and antiquing. I would describe myself as more goofy and dorky than nerdy. I like to go out and do fun things but also stay in and cuddle and relax. I guess it depends on my mood and the weather. I prefer the cold and would love to live in a state with actual seasons and snow. I'm 5'10, stocky AKA fat and open for adventure and new experiences.
Here are some random facts about me:
Some of my favorite bands are: The Black Keys, Kings of Leon, The Beatles, Creedence Clearwater Revival and The White Stripes.
Christmas is my favorite holiday, mainly because of the cold and festive activities.
I come from a medium-ish family.
I'm exceptionally patient but every person has a breaking point lol
I like traveling a lot. It's a basic thing that lots of people like. But I've found lots of people hate to leave their house, town or state so if that's you we probably might not be a good match. I also enjoy the mountains. But I don't like roughing it (give me that sweet AC in the summer). Hiking is so hard on my knees and I haven't done it in a while that if I were to I think about doing it I'd about die or twist a kankle.
I don't eat seafood, mushrooms, artichokes or pineapple on pizza (Who cares about this? Doesn't mean I won't go to a restaurant with you that has these things)
Never went to college as I'm horrible in a classroom setting and at taking tests.
Have probably the most boring job imaginable (Ask me about it)
Overweight but trying to work on it and make better choices (Get healthier and lose weight together maybe?)
Non religious but no issue with what you believe. (If anything)
Looking into sterilization. If you are already maybe you can give me some info or tips?
My own red flags 🚩
I work too much and oftentimes can't talk.
I send selfies often. I'm a visual person and like receiving photos. Apparently it's a generational thing. Hopefully you think pictures are neat as well? Is it really that weird to want to see you and your life and show you mine?
I sometimes speedily become attached to people, not in a weird way, but if I like you and we have some kind of connection, I will enjoy talking to you and want to do it often.
I'm a very organized person and will plan out pretty much anything from a vacation to a road trip to a birthday. This makes being with a go with the flow type of person hard at times I've learned but still very much doable.
Due to childhood trauma I'm secretive which can be annoying.
MY own "HELL YES" 🏁
I know how to cook.
I will always drive if you want. (Within reason)
Great at escape rooms and jigsaw puzzles.
Can read a map.
Decent at reading backwards upside down writing.
What I'm looking for:
Is my age or older. But I'm willing to go quite a bit lower if you are neat and we have stuff in common. But super young isn't my goal here.
Mature, considerate, responsible and funny (Dorky wouldn't hurt)
Someone who never cheats, honesty and trust are important to me.
Someone who is open-minded, willing to try new things, be adventurous, funny and nerdy.
Someone who believes in sharing household chores equally because we are both adults.
Be open and frank about issues you or I are having. Not pushy or jealous. Won't yell or argue about stupid things, I've had enough of that.
Willing to push me to become a better version of myself (Can you turn me into Batman?)
If this sounds like you then feel free to reach out and say hi or challenge me to a game of Scrabble/Pictionary/hand to hand combat maybe? Maybe Wordle or some online vidya game?
P.S. I realize my post isn't for everyone but if your seeing red flags from my post then I'd say trust your gut and please don't message me as we probably aren't compatible. I honestly don't mean that in a mean or hurtful way. I've just been messaged quite often with women saying they pushed aside red flags to get to know me. Please don't, it never ends well and you end up wasting both of our time. Wouldn't you rather spend it finding your person with no flags?
submitted by Piano_Away to R4R30Plus [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 22:55 Piano_Away 35 [M4R] Texas - Interested in a Triad/Throuple

I apologize as it's a bit of a novel and doesn't quite make grammatical sense in some spots. I can read goodly now and again lol. The reason it says M4R is because I mainly like women and trans women but I also like a very very very specific type of guy and certain trans men as I'm partially bi. Chances are you aren't that type but feel free to ask if you are. (Didn’t want to offend anyone so I’d rather say in private) Just throwing that out there as it's a deal breaker for most women. Which why would it be? The number one reason I get is I'm going to cheat on them with a guy. As if being bi has any bearing on cheating and not the persons character.
I'm a 35 year old guy living in the middle-ish of Texas looking for a female partner. Partner as in LTR. That's Long Term Relationship meaning boyfriend and girlfriend and holding hands type of stuff. You know, adult things? I had someone comment I was too vague so this is me being specific. I'm gonna be honest and kinda sad so bare with me.
So I spent New Years alone (I realize it's June lol but I have yet to meet someone and I think the story is still somewhat relevant). Rang in the New Year in bed staring at the ceiling listening to fireworks go off into the night. The next day I cried randomly while browsing for a movie to watch on TV. At first I didn't know why as I'm not much of a crier but I realized for the first time that I genuinely felt alone. I have no partner, no family that I speak to, no friends just acquaintances, really no one there for me. That's my own doing which took years to accomplish through me being closed off and just shutting people out, so I figure it might take just as long to fix. I'm not complaining as I got myself into this predicament. It's gonna sound dumb but I wanted a New Years kiss. I'd never had one and it seemed like a fun dumb silly thing to do. Eh maybe one day. Ok well back to my spiel. (I'm not depressed or anything or wanting attention) Some of my hobbies and interests are movies, reading, cooking, kayaking, records, video games, board games, snorkeling, bowling, swimming, escape rooms, puzzles and antiquing. I would describe myself as more goofy and dorky than nerdy. I like to go out and do fun things but also stay in and cuddle and relax. I guess it depends on my mood and the weather. I prefer the cold and would love to live in a state with actual seasons and snow. I'm 5'10, stocky AKA fat and open for adventure and new experiences.
Here are some random facts about me:
Some of my favorite bands are: The Black Keys, Kings of Leon, The Beatles, Creedence Clearwater Revival and The White Stripes.
Christmas is my favorite holiday, mainly because of the cold and festive activities.
I come from a medium-ish family.
I'm exceptionally patient but every person has a breaking point lol
I like traveling a lot. It's a basic thing that lots of people like. But I've found lots of people hate to leave their house, town or state so if that's you we probably might not be a good match. I also enjoy the mountains. But I don't like roughing it (give me that sweet AC in the summer). Hiking is so hard on my knees and I haven't done it in a while that if I were to I think about doing it I'd about die or twist a kankle.
I don't eat seafood, mushrooms, artichokes or pineapple on pizza (Who cares about this? Doesn't mean I won't go to a restaurant with you that has these things)
Never went to college as I'm horrible in a classroom setting and at taking tests.
Have probably the most boring job imaginable (Ask me about it)
Overweight but trying to work on it and make better choices (Get healthier and lose weight together maybe?)
Non religious but no issue with what you believe. (If anything)
Looking into sterilization. If you are already maybe you can give me some info or tips?
My own red flags 🚩
I work too much and oftentimes can't talk.
I send selfies often. I'm a visual person and like receiving photos. Apparently it's a generational thing. Hopefully you think pictures are neat as well? Is it really that weird to want to see you and your life and show you mine?
I sometimes speedily become attached to people, not in a weird way, but if I like you and we have some kind of connection, I will enjoy talking to you and want to do it often.
I'm a very organized person and will plan out pretty much anything from a vacation to a road trip to a birthday. This makes being with a go with the flow type of person hard at times I've learned but still very much doable.
Due to childhood trauma I'm secretive which can be annoying.
MY own "HELL YES" 🏁
I know how to cook.
I will always drive if you want. (Within reason)
Great at escape rooms and jigsaw puzzles.
Can read a map.
Decent at reading backwards upside down writing.
What I'm looking for:
Is my age or older. But I'm willing to go quite a bit lower if you are neat and we have stuff in common. But super young isn't my goal here.
Mature, considerate, responsible and funny (Dorky wouldn't hurt)
Someone who never cheats, honesty and trust are important to me.
Someone who is open-minded, willing to try new things, be adventurous, funny and nerdy.
Someone who believes in sharing household chores equally because we are both adults.
Be open and frank about issues you or I are having. Not pushy or jealous. Won't yell or argue about stupid things, I've had enough of that.
Willing to push me to become a better version of myself (Can you turn me into Batman?)
If this sounds like you then feel free to reach out and say hi or challenge me to a game of Scrabble/Pictionary/hand to hand combat maybe? Maybe Wordle or some online vidya game?
P.S. I realize my post isn't for everyone but if your seeing red flags from my post then I'd say trust your gut and please don't message me as we probably aren't compatible. I honestly don't mean that in a mean or hurtful way. I've just been messaged quite often with women saying they pushed aside red flags to get to know me. Please don't, it never ends well and you end up wasting both of our time. Wouldn't you rather spend it finding your person with no flags?
submitted by Piano_Away to polyamoryR4R [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 18:48 ogstabhappytwitch I asked for a spice list from chatgpt, this is what it gave me

Open sidebar
Spice & Herb Origins

You are a chef, spice and herb expert and culinary Master. I want you to list, organize and explain every spice and herb in existence Categorically based on location of origin. Including rare and exotic spices and herbs as well as common house hold versions. I want this list to contain every spice and herb in existence with a 2 sentence explanation about the herb and spices
2 / 2
ChatGPT
As an AI text-based model, I can certainly provide you with a comprehensive list of spices and herbs based on their location of origin, along with brief explanations. However, please note that it's virtually impossible to capture every single spice and herb in existence in a single list, as new ones are discovered or created over time. Nevertheless, I will include a wide range of common, rare, and exotic spices and herbs for your reference. Here is the list organized by location:
Indian Subcontinent:
Turmeric: A vibrant yellow spice with a warm and earthy flavor, commonly used in curries and known for its anti-inflammatory properties.
Cardamom: A fragrant spice with a sweet and citrusy taste, used in both sweet and savory dishes, known for its digestive benefits.
Cumin: A pungent spice with a warm and nutty flavor, widely used in Indian and Middle Eastern cuisines, and known for its aid in digestion.
Mediterranean:
Oregano: A robust herb with a peppery and slightly bitter taste, often used in Italian and Greek dishes, particularly in tomato-based sauces and on pizza.
Rosemary: A fragrant herb with a pine-like aroma and a slightly bitter flavor, commonly used in Mediterranean cuisine, especially with roasted meats and potatoes.
Saffron: A highly prized spice derived from the dried stigmas of crocus flowers, it has a distinct floral aroma and imparts a rich golden color to dishes, often used in paella and risotto.
East Asia:
Ginger: A zesty and aromatic root with a warm and slightly spicy flavor, widely used in Asian cuisines, known for its digestive and anti-inflammatory properties.
Star anise: A star-shaped spice with a licorice-like flavor, used in Chinese cuisine and commonly found in five-spice powder and various soups and braised dishes.
Lemongrass: A citrusy and refreshing herb with a delicate flavor, commonly used in Thai and Vietnamese cuisines, especially in soups, curries, and teas.
Middle East:
Sumac: A tangy and slightly fruity spice with a deep red color, often used in Middle Eastern cuisine as a flavor enhancer for salads, meats, and rice dishes.
Za'atar: A blend of dried herbs including thyme, oregano, and sumac, mixed with sesame seeds and salt, commonly used in Middle Eastern cooking as a seasoning for bread, meats, and vegetables.
Baharat: A spice blend consisting of warm spices like black pepper, cinnamon, cardamom, and cloves, used in Middle Eastern dishes, particularly in meat preparations and rice dishes.
South America:
Aji amarillo: A bright yellow chili pepper with a fruity and slightly floral flavor, commonly used in Peruvian cuisine to add heat and depth to various dishes, such as ceviche and sauces.
Cilantro: An herb with a distinct and refreshing flavor, often used in Mexican and Latin American cuisines, particularly in salsas, guacamole, and as a garnish.
Annatto: A reddish-orange spice derived from the seeds of the achiote tree, used in Latin American cuisines for its vibrant color and mild peppery flavor, commonly found in dishes like rice, stews, and marinades.
Africa:
Harissa: A fiery chili paste made from roasted red peppers, spices, and herbs, commonly used in North African cuisine as a condiment or flavoring agent for soups, stews, and grilled meats.
Berbere: An aromatic spice blend containing chili peppers, ginger, garlic, and various other spices, widely used in Ethiopian and Eritrean cuisines to flavor stews and sauces.
Grains of paradise: A peppery and slightly citrusy spice similar to black pepper, native to West Africa, used to season meats, soups, and spice blends.
Please note that this list is by no means exhaustive, but it provides a glimpse into the diverse array of spices and herbs found across different regions.

I want this to be an exhaustive list of all known spices and herbs including rare and expensive ingredients. Do not spare a single detail, and use all your resources to compile this list.
ChatGPT
I apologize for the confusion, but compiling an exhaustive list of all known spices and herbs, including rare and expensive ingredients, would be an enormous task that goes beyond the scope of this text-based conversation. There are thousands of spices and herbs used in various culinary traditions worldwide, and the knowledge of such ingredients is continually expanding and evolving.
Additionally, it's important to note that spices and herbs can vary in their availability depending on factors such as seasonality, cultivation, and regional accessibility. Some rare and expensive ingredients may be difficult to source or may only be found in specific regions or markets.
However, I can provide you with a more comprehensive list of spices and herbs from various regions to broaden your understanding of the vast range of culinary ingredients. Please let me know if you'd like me to proceed with that approach.

Lidt at least 150 rare spices and herbs including and not limited to house hold varieties as well as lesser known herbs and spices
ChatGPT
Certainly! Here is a list of 150 rare spices and herbs, including both household varieties and lesser-known ingredients:
Grains of Paradise: A peppery spice with citrusy undertones, resembling black pepper.
Ajowan: A pungent spice with a thyme-like flavor, commonly used in Indian and Middle Eastern cuisines.
Asafoetida: A strong-smelling spice with a savory flavor, used as a flavor enhancer in Indian and Middle Eastern cooking.
Epazote: A Mexican herb with a strong, earthy flavor, often used in bean dishes and salsas.
Long Pepper: A spice resembling black peppercorns but with a more complex and subtle flavor.
Mace: The dried outer covering of nutmeg, with a warm and aromatic flavor used in both sweet and savory dishes.
Cubeb Pepper: A spice with a peppery and slightly sweet flavor, often used in Indonesian and North African cuisines.
Grains of Selim: An African spice with a smoky and slightly bitter flavor, used in West African dishes.
Sarawak Pepper: A high-quality black pepper variety from Malaysia, known for its strong aroma and fruity undertones.
Juniper Berries: Small, blue berries with a pine-like flavor, commonly used in Scandinavian and Northern European cuisines.
Shiso: A Japanese herb with a unique flavor profile that combines mint, basil, and citrus notes.
Nigella Seeds: Tiny black seeds with a nutty and slightly bitter taste, often used in Indian and Middle Eastern cooking.
Lovage: A perennial herb with a flavor reminiscent of celery and parsley, used as a seasoning and in soups.
Sichuan Pepper: A spice with a citrusy and numbing effect, commonly used in Chinese cuisine, particularly in Sichuan dishes.
Epice du Cru: A French spice blend consisting of various aromatic herbs and spices, often used in French cooking.
Grains of Heaven: A spice similar to cardamom but with a more pungent and resinous flavor, native to West Africa.
Kaffir Lime Leaves: Fragrant leaves with a citrusy flavor, commonly used in Thai and Southeast Asian cuisines.
Anise Hyssop: A herb with a licorice-like flavor, often used in teas, desserts, and savory dishes.
Mahlab: Ground cherry pits with a sweet and nutty flavor, used in Middle Eastern baked goods.
Voatsiperifery Pepper: A rare and wild pepper variety from Madagascar, known for its complex and fruity taste.
Saffron Crocus: The flower stigmas used to produce saffron, one of the most expensive spices in the world, prized for its vibrant color and delicate flavor.
Schinus Molle: Also known as Pink Peppercorns, these berries have a sweet and mildly spicy flavor, often used in gourmet dishes.
Chervil: A delicate herb with a mild anise-like flavor, used in French cuisine, particularly in salads and egg dishes.
Tasmanian Pepperberry: Native to Australia, these berries have a unique, fruity, and spicy flavor, often used in spice blends and marinades.
Grains of Selim: A spice with a smoky and mildly hot flavor, used in West African cuisine to season meats, soups, and stews.
Angelica: A fragrant herb with a musky and bitter flavor, commonly used in Scandinavian and Eastern European cuisines.
Pandan Leaves: Fragrant leaves used in Southeast Asian cooking to add aroma and flavor to desserts and rice dishes.
Black Garlic: Fermented garlic with a soft and sweet flavor, often used as a gourmet ingredient in various cuisines.
Vietnamese Balm: An herb with a citrusy and minty flavor, commonly used in Vietnamese cooking in salads and soups.
Japanese Knotweed: A tart and tangy herb used in jams, pies, and sauces, resembling the flavor of rhubarb.
Perilla: A herb with a unique flavor profile, combining mint, basil, and anise notes, commonly used in Korean and Japanese cuisines.
Tasmanian Pepperleaf: The leaves of this native Australian plant have a spicy and peppery flavor, used to season meats and seafood.
Sweet Cicely: An herb with a sweet and anise-like flavor, often used in desserts and as a natural sweetener.
Grains of Paradise: A West African spice with a warm and peppery flavor, commonly used in spiced beers and ales.
Lemon Verbena: A fragrant herb with a strong lemon flavor, used to add citrusy notes to teas, desserts, and sauces.
Culantro: An herb with a pungent and strong flavor, often used in Latin American and Caribbean cuisines.
Black Salt: Also known as Kala Namak, this Indian salt has a sulfurous and eggy flavor, used in vegan dishes to mimic the taste of eggs.
Sweet Woodruff: An herb with a sweet and earthy flavor, often used to flavor drinks, desserts, and jellies.
Peruvian Black Mint: An herb with a strong and minty flavor, commonly used in Peruvian cooking, especially in ceviche.
Blue Fenugreek: A spice with a smoky and slightly bitter flavor, used in Georgian cuisine to season meats and stews.
Chinese Five Spice: A blend of five spices—star anise, cloves, Chinese cinnamon, Sichuan pepper, and fennel seeds—used in Chinese cuisine for a balanced flavor.
Hyssop: An aromatic herb with a minty and slightly bitter taste, often used in teas, liqueurs, and Mediterranean dishes.
Sansho Pepper: A Japanese spice with a citrusy and numbing effect, commonly used in Japanese cuisine, particularly in grilled dishes and noodles.
Barberry: Tangy berries used as a souring agent in Iranian and Middle Eastern cuisines, often added to rice dishes and stews.
Sichuan Button: A flower bud with a tingling and numbing sensation, used to add a unique sensory experience to dishes and cocktails.
Galangal: A rhizome with a spicy and citrusy flavor, commonly used in Southeast Asian cooking, particularly in curries and stir-fries.
Elderflower: Fragrant flowers used to add a floral aroma to drinks, desserts, and syrups.
Lovage Seeds: Seeds with a strong flavor reminiscent of celery and anise, used to season soups, stews, and pickles.
Wattleseed: Ground seeds of Australian Acacia plants, with a nutty and roasted flavor, often used in baked goods and sauces.
Curry Leaves: Fragrant leaves used in South Indian and Sri Lankan cuisines to add aroma and flavor to curries and rice dishes.
Lemon Myrtle: An Australian herb with a strong lemon flavor, commonly used in desserts, sauces, and seafood dishes.
Tarragon: An herb with a subtle anise-like flavor, commonly used in French cuisine to season sauces, dressings, and poultry.
Vietnamese Mint: An herb with a peppery and citrusy flavor, often used in Vietnamese cuisine in salads, soups, and spring rolls.
Rau Ram: A Vietnamese herb with a pungent and minty taste, used in salads, soups, and noodle dishes.
Sweetgrass: An herb with a sweet and vanilla-like aroma, often used in Native American cuisine for flavoring teas, desserts, and smudging ceremonies.
Peruvian Pink Salt: A gourmet salt with a delicate flavor and a blush-pink hue, often used as a finishing salt for enhancing the taste of dishes.
Red Shiso: A Japanese herb with a tangy and slightly spicy taste, commonly used to pickle plums and season sushi rice.
Lemon Balm: A herb with a lemony and minty flavor, often used in teas, desserts, and salads.
Thai Basil: An herb with a strong and slightly sweet flavor, commonly used in Thai cuisine, particularly in stir-fries, curries, and soups.
Salicornia: A sea vegetable with a crunchy texture and a salty flavor, often used in salads and seafood dishes.
Lemon Thyme: A herb with a citrusy and herbal flavor, commonly used as a seasoning for poultry, seafood, and vegetables.
Lovage Root: The root of the lovage plant, with a strong and aromatic flavor, used in soups, stews, and pickles.
Dragon's Breath: A chili pepper claimed to be one of the spiciest in the world, with an intense and long-lasting heat.
Carob: A sweet and chocolatey substitute for cocoa powder, often used in desserts and as a coffee substitute.
Chameleon Plant: An edible plant with a tart and slightly tangy taste, used in salads and stir-fries.
Epazote: A Mexican herb with a pungent and earthy flavor, often used in bean dishes, soups, and tamales.
Lemon Basil: An herb with a strong lemon flavor and aroma, often used in teas, desserts, and seafood dishes.
Chinese Mugwort: An herb used in traditional Chinese medicine and cooking for its aromatic and bitter properties.
Szechuan Peppercorn Oil: An oil infused with Szechuan peppercorns, used to add a numbing and spicy flavor to dishes.
Chinese Red Dates: Sweet and chewy dates used in Chinese cuisine for their natural sweetness and health benefits.
Rat Tail Radish: An Asian vegetable with long, slender pods that have a spicy and radish-like flavor, often used in stir-fries.
Black Cumin: Small black seeds with a smoky and nutty flavor, used in Indian, Middle Eastern, and North African cuisines.
Mexican Marigold: An herb with a pungent and floral flavor, often used in Mexican cooking, particularly in moles and stews.
Fingerroot: A ginger-like rhizome with a citrusy and spicy flavor, commonly used in Southeast Asian cuisines.
Longevity Spinach: A leafy green vegetable with a mild and slightly tangy taste, used in soups, stir-fries, and salads.
Cuban Oregano: An herb with a strong and pungent flavor, often used in Caribbean and Latin American cuisines.
Fish Mint: An herb with a strong fishy aroma and flavor, used in Vietnamese and Southeast Asian cuisines in salads and soups.
Black Sesame Seeds: Small seeds with a rich and nutty flavor, often used in Asian desserts, breads, and as a topping.
Blue Tansy: A flower with a herbal and slightly fruity aroma, used in herbal teas and as a natural coloring agent.
Red Bayberry: Small berries with a tart and sweet flavor, commonly used in Chinese and Taiwanese cuisines for jams and sauces.
Cuban Oregano: An herb with a pungent and savory flavor, commonly used in Caribbean and Latin American cuisines.
Wasabi Leaves: The leaves of the wasabi plant, with a similar flavor to wasabi root, often used in salads, sushi, and pickles.
Wild Fennel Pollen: The pollen of wild fennel flowers, with a sweet and aromatic flavor, used as a gourmet seasoning.
Mitsuba: A Japanese herb with a parsley-like flavor and a hint of celery, used in soups, salads, and as a garnish.
Samphire: A coastal plant with a salty and crispy texture, often used in salads, seafood dishes, and pickles.
Makhana: Also known as Fox Nuts, these are seeds with a light and crunchy texture, used in Indian sweets and snacks.
Chinese Artichoke: A root vegetable with a nutty and sweet flavor, often used in stir-fries, salads, and pickles.
Wintergreen: A minty herb with a cooling and refreshing flavor, often used in candies, gums, and herbal teas.
Mountain Pepper: Native to Australia, these berries have a hot and spicy flavor, often used in spice blends and sauces.
White Turmeric: A rhizome with a peppery and earthy flavor, used in Indonesian and Thai cuisines for curries and soups.
Thai Eggplant: Small eggplants with a slightly bitter and tangy taste, commonly used in Thai curries and stir-fries.
Chayote: A fruit with a mild and crisp texture, often used in salads, stir-fries, and soups.
Marjoram: An herb with a delicate and sweet flavor, often used in Mediterranean and Middle Eastern cuisines.
Burdock Root: A root vegetable with a mild and earthy flavor, often used in stir-fries, soups, and teas.
Brazilian Peppertree: A plant with small red berries that have a spicy and peppery flavor, commonly used in Brazilian cuisine.
Tahitian Vanilla: Vanilla beans with a floral and fruity flavor, often used in desserts, baked goods, and beverages.
Grains of Paradise: A spice with a zesty and peppery flavor, commonly used in Scandinavian and African cuisines.
Vietnamese Coriander: An herb with a spicy and citrusy flavor, commonly used in Vietnamese and Southeast Asian cuisines.
Salal Berry: Small berries with a tart and slightly sweet flavor, often used in jams, pies, and desserts.
Jungle Pepper: A wild pepper variety from the Amazon rainforest, known for its hot and fruity taste.
Java Pepper: A rare and aromatic pepper variety from Indonesia, used to add a unique flavor to various dishes.
Red Perilla: A herb with a spicy and cinnamon-like flavor, often used in Korean and Japanese cuisines.
Ratanhia Root: A root used in herbal medicine and as a natural dye, with a bitter and astringent taste.
Honshimeji Mushroom: A delicate and flavorful mushroom used in Asian cuisines in soups, stir-fries, and hot pots.
Persian Cumin: A variety of cumin with a distinct aroma and flavor, commonly used in Persian and Middle Eastern cuisines.
Vietnamese Cinnamon: A type of cinnamon with a sweet and spicy flavor, commonly used in baking and desserts.
Ajwain Leaves: The leaves of the ajwain plant, with a pungent and thyme-like flavor, often used in Indian cooking.
Yamatoimo: A variety of Japanese yam with a slimy and starchy texture, commonly used in soups, stews, and pickles.
Black Cardamom: Larger and smokier than green cardamom, with a bold and aromatic flavor, often used in savory dishes and spice blends.
Japanese Pepper: A spice with a citrusy and peppery taste, commonly used in Japanese cuisine to season grilled meats and soups.
Moringa Leaves: Nutrient-rich leaves with a mild and slightly earthy flavor, often used in salads, soups, and smoothies.
Vietnamese Mint: An herb with a peppery and citrusy flavor, commonly used in Vietnamese cuisine in salads, soups, and spring rolls.
Japanese Mustard Greens: Leafy greens with a sharp and spicy flavor, often used in Japanese cuisine for pickling and stir-fries.
Wasabi Arugula: A leafy green with a peppery and wasabi-like taste, used in salads, sandwiches, and as a garnish.
Tasmanian Pepperleaf: The leaves of this native Australian plant have a spicy and peppery flavor, used to season meats and seafood.
Spanish Saffron: The stigmas of the saffron crocus, with a deep and floral flavor, often used in paella and risotto.
Stone Flower: A dried flower bud with a woody and earthy flavor, commonly used in Indian cuisine to add complexity to curries and biryanis.
Vietnamese Star Anise: A variety of star anise with a stronger and more pungent flavor, commonly used in Vietnamese dishes.
Hyssop: An aromatic herb with a minty and slightly bitter taste, often used in teas, liqueurs, and Mediterranean dishes.
Ajwain Seeds: Small seeds with a strong and pungent flavor, commonly used in Indian cooking to add a distinctive taste to breads and snacks.
White Sage: An herb with a strong and savory flavor, often used in Native American smudging ceremonies and as a culinary seasoning.
Karapulko: A South African herb with a bitter and medicinal taste, commonly used in traditional African dishes and teas.
Nance: Small yellow fruits with a tangy and tropical flavor, often used in Latin American desserts, sauces, and drinks.
Thyme-Scented Geranium: A geranium variety with a thyme-like fragrance, commonly used in teas, desserts, and potpourri.
Sarsaparilla: A root with a sweet and herbal flavor, commonly used in beverages and traditional herbal remedies.
Japanese Green Shiso: An herb with a minty and basil-like flavor, commonly used in Japanese cooking to season rice, sushi, and soups.
Voatsiperifery Pepper: A rare and wild pepper variety from Madagascar, known for its complex and fruity taste.
Quassia: A bitter herb used in herbal medicine and as a flavoring agent in bitters and liqueurs.
Lemon Ironbark: An Australian tree with leaves used to brew a lemony and herbal tea.
Fenugreek Leaves: Dried leaves with a slightly bitter and nutty flavor, commonly used in Indian and Middle Eastern cooking.
Calendula: Edible flowers with a mild and slightly spicy flavor, used in salads, soups, and as a natural food coloring.
Sichuan Peppercorn Oil: An oil infused with Sichuan peppercorns, used to add a numbing and spicy flavor to dishes.
Sawtooth Coriander: An herb with a cilantro-like taste but with a stronger and more citrusy flavor, commonly used in Southeast Asian cuisine.
Borage: Edible flowers and leaves with a cucumber-like flavor, often used in salads, teas, and cocktails.
Kudzu: A root starch with a mild and starchy taste, often used as a thickening agent in Asian cooking.
Herbes de Provence: A blend of dried herbs including thyme, lavender, rosemary, and oregano, commonly used in French cuisine.
Quinoa: A nutrient-rich pseudocereal with a nutty and slightly bitter flavor, commonly used as a rice substitute or in salads.
Wild Rice: A type of grass seed with a nutty and chewy texture, commonly used in pilafs, soups, and salads.
Cardamom Pods: Pods containing small black seeds with a sweet and floral flavor, often used in Indian and Middle Eastern cuisines.
Juniper Berries: Small berries with a piney and slightly citrusy flavor, commonly used in gin production and as a seasoning for game meat.
Camu Camu: A fruit with a tart and tangy taste, known for its high vitamin C content, often used in beverages and desserts.
Shiso Leaves: A herb with a distinctive flavor, combining mint, basil, and citrus notes, commonly used in Japanese and Korean cuisines.
Chervil: An herb with a delicate and slightly anise-like flavor, often used in French cooking as a garnish or in sauces.
Cubeb Pepper: Small berries with a spicy and peppery flavor, commonly used in Indonesian and North African cuisines.
Achiote: Also known as annatto, these seeds have a mild and earthy flavor, often used as a natural food coloring and in spice blends.
Ashwagandha: A medicinal herb with a slightly bitter and earthy taste, often used in traditional Ayurvedic medicine.
Dill Pollen: The pollen of the dill flower, with a strong and aromatic flavor, used as a gourmet seasoning.
Nigella Seeds: Small black seeds with a nutty and peppery flavor, commonly used in Middle Eastern and Indian cuisines.
Aleppo Pepper: A mild and fruity pepper variety, commonly used in Middle Eastern and Mediterranean cuisines.
Indian Bay Leaf: A leaf with a strong and spicy aroma, used in Indian and South Asian cooking for its fragrance and flavor.
Please note that this list is not exhaustive, and there are many more rare spices and herbs available.
Free Research Preview. ChatGPT may produce inaccurate information about people, places, or facts. ChatGPT May 24 Version
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submitted by ogstabhappytwitch to KitchenConfidential [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 12:23 ozgyrex American fast food burgers are low quality garbage

I'm Australian and grew up in the '80s and if we got burgers for a fun, family takeaway dinner at home we'd procure them from the local fish 'n chips or milk bar. The burgers were made from fresh buns which were around 12cm in diameter and toasted on the hot plate, fresh diced lettuce, a really thick (~2-3cm) home-made patty made from fresh mince meat and herbs & spices, grilled sliced onions, fresh tomato, sliced beetroot, bacon rasher, egg (optional) and your choice of barbeque or tomato sauce. In summary, it was awesome - an absolute taste sensation and one could smell the burgers from across the street they were that good.
Here's a photo of what I'm talking about
After consuming these delicious burgers my entire young life and never having tried a McDonald's burger; on a family holiday some time in the mid-late 80's we were on a long drive to our holiday destination we had to stop for dinner and the only option available at the time of night was McDonald's. Kids at school used to frequent McDonald's fairly regularly and would all talk about it and I was somewhat curious about what they were all carrying on about. We ordered our burgers and what we unravelled from the package was what I can only describe as a flaccid, horrible, plastic looking mess of disappointment. Firstly, the burger looked nothing like what was shown in the flashy ads on TV or the photos depicted on the menu. It was about half the size of what we expected, there were a few crumbs of lettuce and a tiny slice of tomato on there and it looked like a blind person had slapped it together. After getting over the disappointment of the burger's appearance, we decided to try them and no sooner as taking a bite of them our mouths expelled the contents directly back into the burger wrapper - they were atrocious! The cheese and burger patty was like plastic and the entire thing tasted like dog food! Needless to say we went hungry that night and that's the last McDonald's burger I've ever eaten.
I continue to get my burgers from local fish 'n chips shops or make them at home (the best).
I don't understand why these American burgers are so popular...
submitted by ozgyrex to unpopularopinion [link] [comments]


2023.06.02 08:05 nilnz Discussion on whether this sub needs to expand the list of post flairs. What other flairs do you think we need?

I wonder if the mods and other regulars in this subreddit think we need to expand the list of post flairs. The flairs make it easier to find posts. However there have been a few posts, mine included that have picked a flair just because we need to flair the post but it isn't indicative of the post. So this defeats the purpose of having a flair.
So this post is to start a discussion on this.
Note: I am suggesting adding to the list of existing flairs. Currently these are the flairs available when I try to post in this sub: Beef, Beverage, Breakfast, Poultry, Dessert, Lamb, Pork, Seafood, Vegetarian, META
Could we share posts about chinese meals without specifically picking on one type of meat. A typical chinese meal usually features more than one protein type (fish, chicken, tofu, beef), a vegetable dish which sometimes has a protein cooked with it, a soup.
Flairs I think we need:
Examples of posts that could have used a Sauces flair:
Vegetable flair example:
Tofu flair examples:
Soup flair examples:
Dumpling flair examples:
Meal flair examples:
Equipment or cooking method flair
Edit to add note listing existing flairs. also added "dim sum" to dumplings list as "dim sum / yum cha"
submitted by nilnz to chinesefood [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 23:30 SemiOmniscient 2007 Camry LE coolant leak. Standed out of town!

2007 Camry LE coolant leak. Standed out of town!
I would really appreciate any help. I'm stuck in Penticton BC. Road tripped here for work. I notice coolant dripping and collected under the radiator. Thankfully didn't overheat at. No check engine light, but looked like coolant tank was bone dry. None of the connections on the back of the radiator were wet. No check engine light, but looked like coolant tank was bone dry. No smoke out of exhaust, and no loss in power or bad engine noise.
Out of desperation I took it to the only auto shop that would take it in right away. They tried to diagnose, checked the power to fans, checked for bubbles in coolant, and replaced the thermostat. They test drove it, saw no leaks and ripped me off with a $500 bill. I don't think they even did a pressure test on the radiator.
I drive it to my motel end of day thinking it's fixed, and the next day I notice another puddle. Now they're ignoring my calls. I wiped up all panels, filled the tank with water, and ran the engine while watching for drips or pooling. It seems to be coming out of the front or underneath the radiator. And the weirdest thing. When I slammed my hood shut, water squirted out of the front grill.
Photos for reference after the "repair". Coolant pooling mostly on left/back of radiator. Pool under front/right of radiator. And dripping centefront.
I would really appreciate any help!
submitted by SemiOmniscient to MechanicAdvice [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 23:21 autobuzzfeedbot 15 of the best things to get at Aldi this month under $6

  1. Zarita frozen cocktail pouches are coming to shelves.
  2. Indulge in the Specially Selected strawberry-cheesecake or dulce-de-leche ice-cream pints.
  3. Grill some Emporium Selection halloumi cheese this summer.
  4. Bring the Little Salad Bar smoked-mozzarella or street-corn pasta salad to your next cookout.
  5. Skip the hassle of boiling potatoes with the Little Salad Bar potato salads.
  6. Get dinner on the table with Mama Cozzi's jalapeño-popper pizza.
  7. Enjoy Sundae Shoppe cones this summer.
  8. Use Emporium Selection baked lemon ricotta for a summery charcuterie board.
  9. Make a quick meal with Park Street Deli Korean bulgogi pulled pork.
  10. Sundae Shoppe lemonade bars make a great snack.
  11. The Moser Roth lemon-chocolate truffles combine sweetness and acidity.
  12. Cool off with Specially Selected multilayer gelato pints.
  13. Whip up sangrias and spritzers with the Pacific Fruit Vineyards sweet lemon wine.
  14. Snack on the sweet-and-spicy Southern Grove chili-spiced dried mango.
  15. Enjoy some seafood with the Specially Selected chimichurri cold-smoked salmon.
Link to article
submitted by autobuzzfeedbot to buzzfeedbot [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 22:50 MSSOM2 I went to a Memorial Day Party on Monday!!!!!!!!!!

This weekend I went to a Memorial Day party; This was the first time that my friend had a party for this occasion (or it was just the first time I got invited), but I was excited to go!
That morning, once I finished getting ready — I got in my car and turned on the radio. I didn’t put on Red Scare because it seems disaster always strikes after I listen. I arrived at my friend’s house and parked on the street. There were about 15-20 cars lined up on the street and in his driveway. The smell of grilled food was in the air once I got out of my car and walked to the backyard; I greeted everyone and went to grab a drink -- when I overheard a conversation:
“Can you believe that Taylor Swift is dating Matty Healy? I can’t believe she would do this — he said such hurtful things!"
One girl replied: “He gives me the ick because he goes by Matty.”
Another said: “Did you see that photo of him wearing a Red Scare hat? I was so shocked he would support such a racist and misogynist podcast! When one of the hosts, Dasha Nekrasova, got cast in Succession — I almost lost my mind! I was so happy that she wasn’t in the last season.”
The first girl said: “Do you have a photo of this Dasha girl? I watched Succession, and I don’t know what character she played.”
I watched in horror when instead of just replying “Comfrey” the girl grabbed her phone and googled Dasha. I knew I should have left because disaster would soon break out, but something compelled me to stay. Then I heard the girl scream:
“OH MY GOD, SHE IS SO BEAUTIFUL! I have to show everyone how good she looks!! Everyone, come here!”
All 30+ people at the party circled her and passed the phone around. I heard some say: “How does she do it?” Another said: “She is too beautiful.” One man walked to the grill, tipped it over, and screamed: “If the world is against Dasha, then I am against the world!!” Everyone cheered. One man picked up the lawn chairs and started throwing them around — one narrowly missed me.
The girl that said the evil things about Dasha earlier was sitting down on the ground, with her head resting against the house’s siding, and was crying: “She is so beautiful -- I didn’t mean what I said earlier, I was just so jealous of her beauty and talent.”
My friend whose house we were at went inside -- two minutes later, he came back with a poster of the logo of Succession and a 2x4. He nailed the poster to the wood and stuck it in the ground. The corners of the poster were blowing in the breeze, and the people with the lit lawn chair legs pressed them up against the 2x4 and lit it on fire! One man yelled, “This is what you get for getting rid of Dasha!” Another man said: "We will lay waste to every piece of Succession merchandise we see!” One girl said, “Everyone, let's go on redscaremerch.com and buy bucket hats -- That way, everyone will know we stand with Dasha!” When everyone was cheering and grabbing their phones, I was able to sneak out and get in my car.
A few hours later, I drove by the house and still heard screaming.
submitted by MSSOM2 to redscarepod [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 17:38 DillonFromSomewhere Resignation Letter in Academic Essay Format

I know quitting your job as a cook usually simply comes with two weeks notice or a ragequit walkout, but for eleven months I worked at a new franchise that had such potential which was being squandered by the incompetence of upper management. I present the nearly 6000 word thesis I turned in on my last day. Locations and names have been changed to cartoon references. Brackets represent ambiguous information in place of specific details.
Krusty Krab Careers Jobs
Opening in [Month/Year], Krusty Krab (KK) Bikini Bottom is on its 4th kitchen manager in less than a year. Krusty Krab O-Town has recently let go its inaugural kitchen manager and sous chef. Almost no member of the Bikini Bottom opening management team remains employed by KK. There is a pattern developing where one must question both the choice of employee and the directive given to new franchises. These lingering issues I brought concerns about in the first weeks of opening but was disregarded at every turn despite my experience with festival traffic. As a result I decided this was not a place I wanted to advance, but with a good-enough paycheck I’d be a lowly grunt in the kitchen four days a week, at five days a week I would have quit or been fired over a public outburst long ago. If Krusty Krab alters course slightly while being true to the brand this could be a successful chain.
My unique employment history in brick and mortar restaurants, food trucks, pop up culinary concepts, trade shows/conventions, and the film industry make me an ideal candidate to be on the opening team for new KK locations. My outgoing nature and foresight are valuable assets. For example, on training week before opening when I was standing around idly without a task I took it upon myself to organize the disarray that was dry storage. Overhearing Krabs tell another manager where he wanted the cleaning products placed, I had a jumping off point and the organization I created nine months ago is still largely in place. Since returning from my vacation in early February I have made it my mission to keep the storage area organized because it was again starting to resemble a hoarder’s house rather than a commercial kitchen. This is now part of my weekly routines because every time I turn my back there is more product being placed haphazardly just anywhere with little regard. I also recently reorganized the walk-in cooler because of problematic stocking with items being placed on the same shelf or below raw proteins. I also simply put all the like products together such as cheeses or fruits that were scattered amongst several shelves. With recent overordering I cannot keep up with the organization of the walk in cooler. The pattern recognition of food types and even simple shapes appears to be lost on the Bikini Bottom crew. My daily reorganization of containers is proof of this. Most days I’ll take a few minutes to put all cylinders together, all cambros together in descending volume, all deep and shallow pans next to each other rather than intermixed. My decision to be a kitchen manager at age 19 from 2005 thru 2008 and rarely enter restaurant management since is very calculated.
With my prior knowledge of professional kitchens I was becoming Bikini Bottom’s resident nag to coworkers as I made note of health department violations on a daily basis. I stopped after being largely ignored for two weeks. My regular health department nags include; a battle with jackets and hats being placed only in the designated area (a designated area that did not exist until I created a place for personal items a in January by neatly organizing the dry storage area again), waiting until prepped items are cooled before a cover is placed on top, placement of raw seafood, open containers (very often sugar, flour, and pancake mix bags ripped open and left), and dirty dishes/containers placed back in rotation. The dirty dishes and containers in rotation with the clean ones are at an atrociously high number. I have given up on making the 4th fryer seafood allergy safe too. With the low volume of seafood allergy safe items Bikini Bottom should purchase smaller baskets to visually discourage cross contamination with the other fryers and baskets. My skills to organize the kitchen do not end with simply where to store products to meet minimal health department standards.
Half of the space in the Bikini Bottom kitchen is completely wasted on an ill-advised walkway to the dishpit. An intelligent design would place a second doorway directly to the dishpit connected to the bar or where the bathrooms reside. Numerous times during the opening week of KK Bikini Bottom I said, yelled, sang, and muttered that we have too many food items for the amount of space we have. Icus stated that there was more space than Bluffington. Is Bluffington intelligently designed? Because Bikini Bottom most certainly isn’t. So Bikini Bottom actually has less space even if there is more square footage. See the attached diagram for an intelligent design that could potentially house a menu of this size. Bikini Bottom forces a line design on this kitchen when an open concept is needed for this menu. It’s as if this floorplan was created by a person who had only ever seen one commercial kitchen previously and couldn’t think 4th dimensionally to understand the needs of the workers to smoothly serve customers.
There is not enough counter space for pizzas without getting off the line, the microwave is placed completely out of the way, the freezer’s curved design is a waste of potential counter space and a falling hazard for containers stored on top of it, the toaster is an overcomplicated and overexpensive piece of machinery that serves exactly one purpose when a flat top could be used to toast bread and other purposes like a quesadilla special, sautee was designed without an overhang for spices, the pantry station lacks the counter space to have two containers of flour and two containers of batter for seafood allergies, there are no Frialator fryers which I have worked with at every single kitchen job previously instead we got the cheap Vulcan model (is that logical), the cheap low boy in pantry that doesn’t drain excess water anywhere it’s just supposed to evaporate somehow but doesn’t, the grill and fryer should be placed next to each other (with a higher volume of crossover than other stations), the floors are flat instead on having a mild decline towards the drains (just look at the standing water residing behind the oven right now), in the dishpit the spraying area and the filled sinks are backwards of a logical dipshit, the ramp to the back door is on the wrong side, there is no refrigerated place downstairs to stage extra food for busy shifts (the beer cooler is once again used for such food items because of this massive oversight), the prep station is an afterthought and miniscule, the dishes on the line are difficult to grab for anyone under 5’11” and inaccessible for anyone under 5’6” (instead of putting them underneath tables that also give that desperately needed counterspace I spoke of), there is not enough space to store to-go containers or boats behind the line, expo is lacking a low boy for the numerous items that are supposed to be cold but are instead kept at room temperature all day long, no one in management thought about buying shelves until right before Bikini Bottom opened as a result the clean full sheets sat on the floor for days, we had only the exact amount of 1⁄6 pans for an absurd amount of time making it impossible to rotate and clean them when necessary (which is daily), we still struggle with 1/9 pan supply. And just when I thought I documented all the poor design choices possible I stumbled upon a person whose office holiday party was booked at KK Bikini Bottom. The deck space works just fine as a deck. It does not double well as a gathering space. The space is too long and narrow for parties, it promotes little splitoff groups rather than a coming together of a larger gathering. It may be advantageous to contact a social psychologist for help designing a private party space that promotes intermingling rather than enforcing small pockets to form. The reorganization of the physical kitchen isn’t all that screams for an overhaul.
There are six positions on the line at the Krusty Krab; expo, oven, grill, sautee, fryer, and pantry. But the pantry and fryer positions are forced together like a bad remix. Everyone who mainly works pantry deserves a $6 raise immediately because it is a station and a half. Both Icus and Krumm, while kitchen manager, kind of acknowledged the pantry is too big for one station without outright mentioning the lopsided distribution of work. I imagine in the only location where this works, Bluffington, a second person joins the pantry at noon because of the unreasonable amount of items one person is tasked with. Bikini Bottom only has one person in this position at all times, maybe modify it for one person? The excess of items on the pantry position largely resembles a position I would call “set-up” or “build” at a previous job that made sensible choices. This build position should have tostadas, tacos, butcher’s blocks, toast, salads, lettuce wrap set ups, and preparing plating for whichever station is most bogged down. I have absolutely lost my mind yelling about salads at least once a month, ranting that they do not belong on the fryer position because of how illogical it is that five salads are included on the mountain of other items the pantry has. I have always considered working in a kitchen a kind of dance, and the pantry station demands an unnecessarily convoluted dance to keep up with the demand. Without the salads, tostadas, and tacos the station is already the busiest. Do we really need to combine ballet and swing by including these extra awkward dance steps in this single station? For a kitchen designed this poorly I suppose it is. Again, see attached document for an intelligently designed kitchen that might be able to accommodate this menu. Unless Bikini Bottom is going to close for a month to fix the baffling floor plan design the menu is shouting to be reduced to 30-36 items.
The menu is too big. Krusty Krab is the jack of all foods, master of none. In general I believe individual locations should be allowed 18% omissions, and 18% unique items to this wildly unwieldy menu sitting around 50 food items including sides. The insistence on keeping menu items that don’t sell at Bikini Bottom because of Bluffington is mind boggling. Chicken tenders do not sell at Bikini Bottom. fried sushi does not sell at Bikini Bottom, not enough to justify their place on the line. I don’t care how well these items work in Bluffinton. They. Do. Not. Work. At. Bikini. Bottom. If the KK location in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean sells an incredible amount of live krill does that mean Bikini Bottom and O-Town must sell live krill too? Take the fried sushi off the menu. I had a complete meltdown about this during a Dimmadome service and my valid point was met with indifference. Replace the kid’s tenders with a kid’s fish sticks. We already have the tilapia fish sticks on the line for tacos. Or make the kid’s fish sticks cod. We cut cod to order for fish tacos in spite of health code violations because it is too rare of an order to make beforehand. Saffron in mashed potatoes? If you must. Why are green tomatoes only on the menu during lunch? Bikini Bottom throws away a sizable amount of spoiled green tomatoes each week. Have green tomatoes on the menu all day long or don’t have them at all. The smoked salmon could go on salads or a special taco to justify its place on the line. The corn pico’s place on the line is unjustified. It only goes on one item, tostadas, which are not particularly popular. If we had a taco salad we could throw the corn pico on there. We also have unreasonable waste from unusable taco shells, smash up those imperfect taco shells and throw them on said taco salad. But before we add salads, let's get rid of the pear and kale salads. The pears' position on the line are unjustified, if we threw them on a taco variation maybe their place on the Bikini Bottom line could be argued but for now they only go on a salad that isn’t particularly popular. The kale salad is an issue of space for a 4th green for salads is too much. The krusty salad is my most hated house salad of all time. And it comes down to the toast with goat cheese. This ancillary step of spreading goat cheese on a cracker is an unnecessary step for an overly complicated dance and should be part of the expo dance if expo wasn’t a shoddily designed afterthought lacking a low boy.
There are a plethora of squeeze bottles on the pantry station that have no place on the overloaded station. They belong to an expo station with a low boy to keep them cold. Pantry has an overwhelming ten squeeze bottles: chipotle crema, sweet chili vinaigrette, buffalo, korean bbq, ranch, caesar, wine vinaigrette, lemon vinaigrette, honey mustard, and lemon aioli. Only the first four are justified on an intelligently designed fryer section, the second four belong on the build station, the last two have no place anywhere but expo. With this extra space sautee could keep their bottles and two purees cold in the fryer's lowboy instead of leaving them at room temperature all day inviting a pathogen party. This theorized intelligently designed expo would have room to keep these four squeeze bottles and a double of every sauce chilled to pour them into ramekins, a move that is highly common in the expo dance. The fact that expo doesn’t have a double of all squeeze bottles is foolish. Expo has to bother an overloaded station to pour these side sauces instead.
How many gallons of basil aioli has Bikini Bottom thrown away in 11 months? Four aiolis in general is way too many and most go on a single item; basil aioli on the incredibly unpopular veggie burger, lemon aioli for calamari, sweet chili aioli for the BLT that is only served half of the day, and garlic aioli actually goes on two items…I believe. What a colossal waste of precious little space, lose two aiolis and then you can sing the logical song with me. Perhaps we can put garlic aioli and sweet chili vinaigrette on the BLT separately and accomplish the exact same thing the sweet chili aioli does. The wings too have unneeded complications. Having worked at a sports bar specializing in wings for the better part of a decade I find KK’s plating of wings to be overly pretentious. The carrots, celery, and blue cheese have lost function. Heffer Wolf always said no one eats the carrot/celery julienne with blue cheese. It’s a complete waste of all the ingredients because you’ve gone too far with the presentation. Wings aren’t fancy. Wings are supposed to have a small pool of sauce and be sloppy. It’s like a sloppy joe that’s not sloppy, an unsloppy joe is a failure to sloppy joes just as the KK presentation of wings is a disparagement to the dish. Ever since training week back in 2022 I have used a scale to give Bikini Bottom a passing or failing grade.
Chokey Chicken to Chum Bucket is the scale I use to judge efficiency and sanity at Bikini Bottom. Both establishments are upscale casual dining experiences in Capitol City in the same vein as KK. Chokey had high employee retention and relatively smooth openings for new locations. Chum Bucket’s employee turnover was high and every location opening was chaotic. Which one sounds closer to KK? Chokey Chicken was filled with chefs I respect including Chef Ren Hoek who remains a close friend to this day. Ren lost his lifelong passion for kitchen work after working management at Chum Bucket. He’s actually seeking work in Bikini Bottom. Call him up at [phone number], but KK will give him Nam’ flashbacks of why he chose driving for a living rather than cooking for five years. The pair of us together helming Bikini Bottom with the ability to omit and create 18% of the overloaded menu can bring success to this franchise. We have worked well numerous times in the past on various concepts in the past including creating The Attack of the Pickled Tomatoes Burger for [Promotional live performance of a TV show] at the Capitol City Theater. We served 100 people in 60 at the [sitcom filming] lunch. That’s physically impossible but somehow we did it quite a few times.
A fun anecdote about Ren Hoek’s KK experience from the soft launch; on training week numerous times I brought concerns about being seafood allergy safe that were dismissed. As mentioned earlier the pantry station lacks the counter space to have two containers of flour and two containers of batter, one each of which seafood never touches. Before the soft launch Chef Stimpy from Bluffington insisted all customers just kind of know everything is prone to be seafood contaminated. Well, chef Ren was a customer that night and this absolutely was not communicated to customers. He claimed to have a slight seafood allergy and was not informed of what the crab soup was. In reality he does not have a seafood allergy. I didn’t discuss the seafood issue with Ren, separately we noticed egregious violations of food safety standards and we each responded in our own way. The soft launch service was so awful that night Chef Ren walked out of a free meal to pay for some ramen, never to return to Bikini Bottom. I attribute this oversight, and many of Bikini Bottom’s (and probably O-Town’s) problems to hubris over the Bluffington location.
Chef Chokey would also be hesitant to join the KK team. It will cost a finder’s fee just for me to reveal Chef Chokey’s name. Chef Chokey was a lead in the rapid expansion of Chokey Chicken restaurants. He opened numerous restaurants and was big on the philosophy that each restaurant must have its own personality in order to fit the unique local culture and the variety of working spaces. This is in direct conflict with the KK way that everything must be exactly like the Bluffington location no matter what. There was only one Chokey Chicken location that had the full menu, Chokey Springfield. Chokey Springfield had a large space which was intelligently designed to accommodate such a large menu. The KK menu is all over the place, closing in on 50 menu items which comes up as a failure on the Chokey Chicken/Chum Bucket scale. This is not the only area KK comes up as a major failure on the Chokey Chicken/Chum Bucket scale.
Has anyone in this company ever worked festival traffic before? Does anyone have the experience of working next to a major venue with 8000 seats before this one? The way Bikini Bottom handles Dimmadome services it certainly appears that the decision-makers fall on the wrong side of the Dunning-Kruger effect. Having all 50 items available during such massive traffic is completely asinine. An unwillingness to serve a partial menu is hindering the Bikini Bottom kitchen staff. I have worked festival traffic before, and Dimmadome events bring in festival traffic. I’ve worked inside a festival whose line never ended but every customer got their order in 5 minutes or less because the line kept flowing with only four items on the menu as that’s what was warranted at the B-Sharps Music Festival. I refuse to be set up for failure the way Bikini Bottom sets up Dimmadome services for failure. The entire week of concerts in [summer] 2022 I was set up for failure every day (it was after this I modified my availability to keep my sanity and my paycheck). When I brought my concerns about running efficiently during Dimmadome services I was labeled a B-worker for the first time in my employment history by Icus and Krabs. It is that moment which I was either going to holler at them both for being 2-dimensional thinkers who were obviously unqualified for the positions they accepted in this company, or just put my head down. If Bikini Bottom has a successful concert day service, hail your team because they snatched victory from the jaws of defeat. They swam with concrete shoes. I often wonder how many customers had bad experiences and never returned after concert days. A Dimmadome service should have no more than 25 items and have one or two specials to divert traffic towards an area the kitchen can keep moving. An Open Cup Open Plate (OCOP) special for foot traffic is absolutely needed. When I suggested OCOP special, Heffer was intrigued by this idea and immediately named burgers as the special to keep foot traffic flowing. Smithers wouldn’t hear this idea, babbling on about what’s advertised instead of hearing out a sound idea. This prattle despite radio commercials having inaccurate hours and social media promoting Bikini Bottom’s steak tacos to this day. I always found Smithers to be a better fit as a middle management office pencil pusher than as a hands-on restaurant manager. Overall I find KK managers are selected to be automatons not to question their orders rather than critical thinkers who could take the restaurant to the next level. During brunch service is another period of time that must be modified to lessen the heft of items. Having a full menu that barely works plus brunch is so deep into Chum Bucket territory, in my opinion we now have to use the Tropic Thunder scale of full [R-word censored by jobs] to describe a 60-plus-item brunch. Chef Ren hired back a Chum Bucket cook who had a mental breakdown and stormed out during brunch (plus full menu) service because Ren knew the employee was justified and upper management was completely unreasonable in their brunch requests. It’s not just questionable decisions that hinder KK staff but improper equipment as well.
This is the first restaurant I have worked at which uses a touch screen on the line rather than tickets. From day one I found this to be technology for technology’s sake inferior to tickets. Chef Ren forced a new Chum Bucket location to rip out touch screens from the line and bring in ticket printers because of the higher efficiency. The touch screen is a great idea for expo, not the entire line. My biggest gripe is that each station does not get all the information. Early on I was regularly yelled at for not staggering my items, well I can’t see the rest of the order; a problem I have never had with a ticket system. Touchscreen software is also much more prone to errors and glitches. When I reported an error during a heavy service Icus and Krabs blamed my skills on the line without looking into the malfunctioning screen further. It was glitchy for weeks before the two finally investigated and corrected the issue I brought to their attention long before. Those two gave me an immense amount of ammunition to dislike them in the opening weeks until I stopped caring. The issue I had with being unable to scroll beyond the bottom of a completely filled screen has returned and is still there as of [my last day]. There are also important details that get buried. A frequent meltdown I have is that sauce on side requests and other important modifications are not capitalized or in red to catch the eye as they have been at jobs with tickets. These details get lost on Bikini Bottom’s touchscreens. A sauce on side salad made by me will be wrong 50% of the time because of the instructions being camouflaged in a word salad. This goes for coleslaw on the side and drizzle on the side too. Drizzle in general I dislike because of the pretentiousness, but whatever, drizzle it on top rather than putting it in a ramekin if you must. There are numerous places where Bikini Bottom overcomplicates matters for reasons I cannot ascertain.
Why is there such a large variety of plates? Why do we have a medium circular plate for salads and a large bowl for salads with protein? This just confuses the simplest of matters. I was told this is done because of the high price hike with protein, a larger presentation was desired. But that price hike is the price of protein in 2023. Bikini Bottom should put all salads in the large bowls and use all the circular salad plates in a skeet shooting promotion. I understand why we have both a circular platter plate and a pizza plate but in my restaurant the circular platter plates must go...or maybe the large platter plate instead. Is the large platter used for anything besides fish and chips? That extra space on fish and chips plates are only used for side sauces which can easily be delivered to customers on small circular plates. What is the medium oval plate doing that the medium rectangular plate isn’t? And vice versa. Why do they both exist when they are approximately the same size? Let me write an internet commercial where we break a lot of plates so we can get some logical use out of the superfluous plates. I don’t care which one is destroyed, the ovals or the rectangles but one of them is an unnecessary redundancy in excess done again. Speaking of commercials, the unimaginative radio advertisements for Bikini Bottom are doing little to lure new customers to the restaurant.
The three radio spots I have heard on KBBL all sound like they were produced by a marketing 101 student who wasn’t a natural in the field. The voiceover actor was so uncharismatic I was certain someone from the office was chosen at random to read the copy. Then I heard that same voiceover actor selling pool supplies on another radio station so I concluded that Bikini Bottom must have hired the cheapest guy in town to produce the most basic of commercials. Perhaps there is someone else you could hire more qualified to voiceover these commercials, an actor with experience on an Emmy award winning cable program whose unique place in the film industry was written about on [website] would be a much wiser choice to be the voice of the KK? (See external link). In the ad there was no catchphrase, no jingle, no music whatsoever. This simple approach to commercials lacks the pizazz to catch the attention of radio listeners. The first two commercials I heard would get a C in marketing 101 as they were nearly the exact same and accomplished the bare minimum to sell wares, the third one would maybe get a B- because there was some sort of attempted gimmick with the voiceover whispering to represent thinking inside his head about what he was going to eat later at KK. Not only does this commercial give no reason for the man to think inside his head, the outside world still and unpopulated. To see what a creative person would do with this concept see the attached script. There is an attempted slogan that could become part of an ad campaign. Commercials aren’t the only lost opportunities in promotions.
There are numerous promotional celebrity tie-ins at Bikini Bottom’s fingertips with Dimmadome performers. The restaurant could have a Phish sandwich as a OCOP special on [Phish performance dates], or a pretentious Jelly Roll on [Jelly Roll performance date]. Has anyone reached out to the Dimmadome theater or talent management for approved special menu items to be promoted inside the dome? Perhaps a special 20% discount to ticket holders? Is Bikini Bottom capable of getting permits to extend Open Container hours beyond [cutoff time] for an afterparty or block party throughout a Dimmadome concert? I see additional marketing opportunities left on the table for all new locations.
I believe new KK locations are missing out on a marketing campaign by opening with the entire cumbersome 50 item menu. This is a staggering amount of menu items which is too much to ask new staffers to perfect all at once. After a few months expanding the menu by approximately ten items is catching to customers who haven’t returned after a single visit or infrequently stop into KK. There are ten new food items that might appeal to them. Just like it appears KK doesn’t know what it’s looking for in a good commercial spot, this company doesn’t appear to recognize a talented from an untalented worker until it’s too late.
It is my understanding that KK had a headhunter to find Icus, the first Bikini Bottom kitchen manager. If it were up to me I’d hire someone to break the legs of that headhunter for bringing in a subpar kitchen lead. We are still attempting to recover from the lousy choices she made in the floor plan. If anybody responsible for Bikini Bottom’s floor plan is still giving input, stop them immediately. Once the doors were open to the public Icus had his head in the clouds to a point where I questioned if he saw the writing on the walls of an imminent demotion and stopped trying as a result. I had a full deck of 3x5 cards in an archaic powerpoint presentation bringing numerous concerns to light that he kept putting off listening to until he was fired. Those same cards were broken out for this essay. The second kitchen manager, Krumm, is a good lesson in honesty. According to Heffer, Krumm was given a bill of goods about how smoothly KK Bikini Bottom was running. Since Krumm stepped into a latrine pit which he was led to believe was a heated pool, he left in short time. Krumm also had plans to modify the menu but when his bosses told him to be a rodeo clown rather than a cowboy Krumm didn’t take too kindly to that. Meanwhile Heffer was the savior of the Bikini Bottom kitchen. I didn’t agree with every single decision he made, but I did with a majority of them. Heffer’s overhaul was such a blessing so I didn’t have to fiddle with the organization of 60% of the equipment anymore, only about 20% now. Too bad Heffer’s crippling depression came back after bashing his head into the wall out of frustration with the shackles KK restrained him with.
The current management team is enthusiastic but inexperienced. I see an accumulation of small infractions that might bring down Bikini Bottom’s health department rating significantly. I see the entire management team being inattentive or unaware about organizational issues. Whatever bureaucratic nonsense corporate tasks everyone with from the original sous chef Skeeter to Patty Mayonnaise that makes them walk away from the line between 11am and 1pm especially is infuriating. I have never been left alone on a multi-person line during peak hours so regularly, and I won’t tolerate it anymore. As much as I believe in his drive, I imagine our current kitchen manager SpongeBob will be let go after a disastrous service during the Dimmadome concert season that someone has to take the fall for. Chef Ren and I could help bring experience in management and dealing with festival traffic...if corporate does not force us to follow a failing strategy.
After working nearly a year at KK you may ask why I’m not proficient on more than one station. Excellent question. First, when I move over to another station the squeeze bottles are never labeled (until Stu Pickles was hired, now they’re sometimes labeled), so I always looked at the glut of unlabeled sauces and I’d go back to my station because the basic information is missing (also a health department violation for having numerous unlabeled, unchilled bottles). In his first week the new general manager Stu Pickles pulled out 90% of the containers under the grill station because they were lacking labels despite an expected health department visit. The second reason for my menu ignorance is the mountain of prep for my own and upcoming shifts I have piled up on my station throughout service. My attention to detail appears to be next level with my ability to anticipate stocking all items for all shifts including the weeknd. The third reason I wouldn’t learn multiple stations is a defense against the afternoon conference calls. In [month] the Bikini Bottom line was unprepared for a busy post lunch because one cook was cut and our expo person was busy with a conference call. The two of us remaining on the line had a miserable slog through an unexpectedly busy afternoon. When I brought this up to Krabs he disregarded me, being a good bean counter he quoted the cost percentage. What he didn’t take into account was the missing expo person who could have jumped on the line and expo to help the understaffed two man team. That person was stuck on a conference call. Just recently I saw the company actively lose money because of this poorly thought-out meeting during business hours. A customer wanted to order a dessert that was 86ed but had been restocked by our prep cook an hour before. The server was unable to sell them their dessert because the only person in the building who could help un-86 an item was on a conference call. This conference call calamity is another bone-headed choice that speaks to a larger decision-making problem within the corporate structure. Finish the conference calls by 10:45 am eastern.
In conclusion, I quit my position as a lowly grunt for this company because of its unwarranted perplexing dance steps and below average management. I don’t care how much varnish and lacquer is supplied, I refuse to polish this Bikini Bottom turd as a manager or full-time employee under the current circumstances. You would have to take a pickaxe to the floor, possibly relocate the bathrooms to add a door to the dishpit, get rid of the cheap low boy that doesn’t properly drain excess water, and Mr Gorbachov knock down that wall in the middle of the kitchen to give the proper amount of space to work. Or simply reduce the menu to 36 items (including sides) because that’s the amount of space this dreadful design can comfortably output. Would Gordon Ramsay compliment KK for all the unnecessary convoluted complications abound, or would Chef Ramsay yell about keeping it simple and demand KK chuck it in the flip? Thanks to the numerous pop up restaurants I have been a part of and the hectic world of trade shows/conventions, I may have more experience than anyone else employed by KK in smoothly opening a new location. I would enjoy being part of the opening team to ensure new locations have an efficiency Bikini Bottom lacks, and to keep upper management away from their worst instincts. Work with me and Chef Ren and we will help you become a well oiled machine like Chokey Chicken instead of the Chum Bucket cesspit Bikini Bottom currently embodies.
submitted by DillonFromSomewhere to jobs [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 17:29 DillonFromSomewhere Resignation Letter in Academic Essay Format

I know quitting your job as a cook usually simply comes with two weeks notice or a ragequit walkout, but for eleven months I worked at a new franchise that had such potential which was being squandered by the incompetence of upper management. I present the nearly 6000 word thesis I turned in on my last day. Locations and names have been changed to cartoon references. Brackets represent ambiguous information in place of specific details.
Krusty Krab Careers Jobs
Opening in [Month/Year], Krusty Krab (KK) Bikini Bottom is on its 4th kitchen manager in less than a year. Krusty Krab O-Town has recently let go its inaugural kitchen manager and sous chef. Almost no member of the Bikini Bottom opening management team remains employed by KK. There is a pattern developing where one must question both the choice of employee and the directive given to new franchises. These lingering issues I brought concerns about in the first weeks of opening but was disregarded at every turn despite my experience with festival traffic. As a result I decided this was not a place I wanted to advance, but with a good-enough paycheck I’d be a lowly grunt in the kitchen four days a week, at five days a week I would have quit or been fired over a public outburst long ago. If Krusty Krab alters course slightly while being true to the brand this could be a successful chain.
My unique employment history in brick and mortar restaurants, food trucks, pop up culinary concepts, trade shows/conventions, and the film industry make me an ideal candidate to be on the opening team for new KK locations. My outgoing nature and foresight are valuable assets. For example, on training week before opening when I was standing around idly without a task I took it upon myself to organize the disarray that was dry storage. Overhearing Krabs tell another manager where he wanted the cleaning products placed, I had a jumping off point and the organization I created nine months ago is still largely in place. Since returning from my vacation in early February I have made it my mission to keep the storage area organized because it was again starting to resemble a hoarder’s house rather than a commercial kitchen. This is now part of my weekly routines because every time I turn my back there is more product being placed haphazardly just anywhere with little regard. I also recently reorganized the walk-in cooler because of problematic stocking with items being placed on the same shelf or below raw proteins. I also simply put all the like products together such as cheeses or fruits that were scattered amongst several shelves. With recent overordering I cannot keep up with the organization of the walk in cooler. The pattern recognition of food types and even simple shapes appears to be lost on the Bikini Bottom crew. My daily reorganization of containers is proof of this. Most days I’ll take a few minutes to put all cylinders together, all cambros together in descending volume, all deep and shallow pans next to each other rather than intermixed. My decision to be a kitchen manager at age 19 from 2005 thru 2008 and rarely enter restaurant management since is very calculated.
With my prior knowledge of professional kitchens I was becoming Bikini Bottom’s resident nag to coworkers as I made note of health department violations on a daily basis. I stopped after being largely ignored for two weeks. My regular health department nags include; a battle with jackets and hats being placed only in the designated area (a designated area that did not exist until I created a place for personal items a in January by neatly organizing the dry storage area again), waiting until prepped items are cooled before a cover is placed on top, placement of raw seafood, open containers (very often sugar, flour, and pancake mix bags ripped open and left), and dirty dishes/containers placed back in rotation. The dirty dishes and containers in rotation with the clean ones are at an atrociously high number. I have given up on making the 4th fryer seafood allergy safe too. With the low volume of seafood allergy safe items Bikini Bottom should purchase smaller baskets to visually discourage cross contamination with the other fryers and baskets. My skills to organize the kitchen do not end with simply where to store products to meet minimal health department standards.
Half of the space in the Bikini Bottom kitchen is completely wasted on an ill-advised walkway to the dishpit. An intelligent design would place a second doorway directly to the dishpit connected to the bar or where the bathrooms reside. Numerous times during the opening week of KK Bikini Bottom I said, yelled, sang, and muttered that we have too many food items for the amount of space we have. Icus stated that there was more space than Bluffington. Is Bluffington intelligently designed? Because Bikini Bottom most certainly isn’t. So Bikini Bottom actually has less space even if there is more square footage. See the attached diagram for an intelligent design that could potentially house a menu of this size. Bikini Bottom forces a line design on this kitchen when an open concept is needed for this menu. It’s as if this floorplan was created by a person who had only ever seen one commercial kitchen previously and couldn’t think 4th dimensionally to understand the needs of the workers to smoothly serve customers.
There is not enough counter space for pizzas without getting off the line, the microwave is placed completely out of the way, the freezer’s curved design is a waste of potential counter space and a falling hazard for containers stored on top of it, the toaster is an overcomplicated and overexpensive piece of machinery that serves exactly one purpose when a flat top could be used to toast bread and other purposes like a quesadilla special, sautee was designed without an overhang for spices, the pantry station lacks the counter space to have two containers of flour and two containers of batter for seafood allergies, there are no Frialator fryers which I have worked with at every single kitchen job previously instead we got the cheap Vulcan model (is that logical), the cheap low boy in pantry that doesn’t drain excess water anywhere it’s just supposed to evaporate somehow but doesn’t, the grill and fryer should be placed next to each other (with a higher volume of crossover than other stations), the floors are flat instead on having a mild decline towards the drains (just look at the standing water residing behind the oven right now), in the dishpit the spraying area and the filled sinks are backwards of a logical dipshit, the ramp to the back door is on the wrong side, there is no refrigerated place downstairs to stage extra food for busy shifts (the beer cooler is once again used for such food items because of this massive oversight), the prep station is an afterthought and miniscule, the dishes on the line are difficult to grab for anyone under 5’11” and inaccessible for anyone under 5’6” (instead of putting them underneath tables that also give that desperately needed counterspace I spoke of), there is not enough space to store to-go containers or boats behind the line, expo is lacking a low boy for the numerous items that are supposed to be cold but are instead kept at room temperature all day long, no one in management thought about buying shelves until right before Bikini Bottom opened as a result the clean full sheets sat on the floor for days, we had only the exact amount of 1⁄6 pans for an absurd amount of time making it impossible to rotate and clean them when necessary (which is daily), we still struggle with 1/9 pan supply. And just when I thought I documented all the poor design choices possible I stumbled upon a person whose office holiday party was booked at KK Bikini Bottom. The deck space works just fine as a deck. It does not double well as a gathering space. The space is too long and narrow for parties, it promotes little splitoff groups rather than a coming together of a larger gathering. It may be advantageous to contact a social psychologist for help designing a private party space that promotes intermingling rather than enforcing small pockets to form. The reorganization of the physical kitchen isn’t all that screams for an overhaul.
There are six positions on the line at the Krusty Krab; expo, oven, grill, sautee, fryer, and pantry. But the pantry and fryer positions are forced together like a bad remix. Everyone who mainly works pantry deserves a $6 raise immediately because it is a station and a half. Both Icus and Krumm, while kitchen manager, kind of acknowledged the pantry is too big for one station without outright mentioning the lopsided distribution of work. I imagine in the only location where this works, Bluffington, a second person joins the pantry at noon because of the unreasonable amount of items one person is tasked with. Bikini Bottom only has one person in this position at all times, maybe modify it for one person? The excess of items on the pantry position largely resembles a position I would call “set-up” or “build” at a previous job that made sensible choices. This build position should have tostadas, tacos, butcher’s blocks, toast, salads, lettuce wrap set ups, and preparing plating for whichever station is most bogged down. I have absolutely lost my mind yelling about salads at least once a month, ranting that they do not belong on the fryer position because of how illogical it is that five salads are included on the mountain of other items the pantry has. I have always considered working in a kitchen a kind of dance, and the pantry station demands an unnecessarily convoluted dance to keep up with the demand. Without the salads, tostadas, and tacos the station is already the busiest. Do we really need to combine ballet and swing by including these extra awkward dance steps in this single station? For a kitchen designed this poorly I suppose it is. Again, see attached document for an intelligently designed kitchen that might be able to accommodate this menu. Unless Bikini Bottom is going to close for a month to fix the baffling floor plan design the menu is shouting to be reduced to 30-36 items.
The menu is too big. Krusty Krab is the jack of all foods, master of none. In general I believe individual locations should be allowed 18% omissions, and 18% unique items to this wildly unwieldy menu sitting around 50 food items including sides. The insistence on keeping menu items that don’t sell at Bikini Bottom because of Bluffington is mind boggling. Chicken tenders do not sell at Bikini Bottom. fried sushi does not sell at Bikini Bottom, not enough to justify their place on the line. I don’t care how well these items work in Bluffinton. They. Do. Not. Work. At. Bikini. Bottom. If the KK location in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean sells an incredible amount of live krill does that mean Bikini Bottom and O-Town must sell live krill too? Take the fried sushi off the menu. I had a complete meltdown about this during a Dimmadome service and my valid point was met with indifference. Replace the kid’s tenders with a kid’s fish sticks. We already have the tilapia fish sticks on the line for tacos. Or make the kid’s fish sticks cod. We cut cod to order for fish tacos in spite of health code violations because it is too rare of an order to make beforehand. Saffron in mashed potatoes? If you must. Why are green tomatoes only on the menu during lunch? Bikini Bottom throws away a sizable amount of spoiled green tomatoes each week. Have green tomatoes on the menu all day long or don’t have them at all. The smoked salmon could go on salads or a special taco to justify its place on the line. The corn pico’s place on the line is unjustified. It only goes on one item, tostadas, which are not particularly popular. If we had a taco salad we could throw the corn pico on there. We also have unreasonable waste from unusable taco shells, smash up those imperfect taco shells and throw them on said taco salad. But before we add salads, let's get rid of the pear and kale salads. The pears' position on the line are unjustified, if we threw them on a taco variation maybe their place on the Bikini Bottom line could be argued but for now they only go on a salad that isn’t particularly popular. The kale salad is an issue of space for a 4th green for salads is too much. The krusty salad is my most hated house salad of all time. And it comes down to the toast with goat cheese. This ancillary step of spreading goat cheese on a cracker is an unnecessary step for an overly complicated dance and should be part of the expo dance if expo wasn’t a shoddily designed afterthought lacking a low boy.
There are a plethora of squeeze bottles on the pantry station that have no place on the overloaded station. They belong to an expo station with a low boy to keep them cold. Pantry has an overwhelming ten squeeze bottles: chipotle crema, sweet chili vinaigrette, buffalo, korean bbq, ranch, caesar, wine vinaigrette, lemon vinaigrette, honey mustard, and lemon aioli. Only the first four are justified on an intelligently designed fryer section, the second four belong on the build station, the last two have no place anywhere but expo. With this extra space sautee could keep their bottles and two purees cold in the fryer's lowboy instead of leaving them at room temperature all day inviting a pathogen party. This theorized intelligently designed expo would have room to keep these four squeeze bottles and a double of every sauce chilled to pour them into ramekins, a move that is highly common in the expo dance. The fact that expo doesn’t have a double of all squeeze bottles is foolish. Expo has to bother an overloaded station to pour these side sauces instead.
How many gallons of basil aioli has Bikini Bottom thrown away in 11 months? Four aiolis in general is way too many and most go on a single item; basil aioli on the incredibly unpopular veggie burger, lemon aioli for calamari, sweet chili aioli for the BLT that is only served half of the day, and garlic aioli actually goes on two items…I believe. What a colossal waste of precious little space, lose two aiolis and then you can sing the logical song with me. Perhaps we can put garlic aioli and sweet chili vinaigrette on the BLT separately and accomplish the exact same thing the sweet chili aioli does. The wings too have unneeded complications. Having worked at a sports bar specializing in wings for the better part of a decade I find KK’s plating of wings to be overly pretentious. The carrots, celery, and blue cheese have lost function. Heffer Wolf always said no one eats the carrot/celery julienne with blue cheese. It’s a complete waste of all the ingredients because you’ve gone too far with the presentation. Wings aren’t fancy. Wings are supposed to have a small pool of sauce and be sloppy. It’s like a sloppy joe that’s not sloppy, an unsloppy joe is a failure to sloppy joes just as the KK presentation of wings is a disparagement to the dish. Ever since training week back in 2022 I have used a scale to give Bikini Bottom a passing or failing grade.
Chokey Chicken to Chum Bucket is the scale I use to judge efficiency and sanity at Bikini Bottom. Both establishments are upscale casual dining experiences in Capitol City in the same vein as KK. Chokey had high employee retention and relatively smooth openings for new locations. Chum Bucket’s employee turnover was high and every location opening was chaotic. Which one sounds closer to KK? Chokey Chicken was filled with chefs I respect including Chef Ren Hoek who remains a close friend to this day. Ren lost his lifelong passion for kitchen work after working management at Chum Bucket. He’s actually seeking work in Bikini Bottom. Call him up at [phone number], but KK will give him Nam’ flashbacks of why he chose driving for a living rather than cooking for five years. The pair of us together helming Bikini Bottom with the ability to omit and create 18% of the overloaded menu can bring success to this franchise. We have worked well numerous times in the past on various concepts in the past including creating The Attack of the Pickled Tomatoes Burger for [Promotional live performance of a TV show] at the Capitol City Theater. We served 100 people in 60 at the [sitcom filming] lunch. That’s physically impossible but somehow we did it quite a few times.
A fun anecdote about Ren Hoek’s KK experience from the soft launch; on training week numerous times I brought concerns about being seafood allergy safe that were dismissed. As mentioned earlier the pantry station lacks the counter space to have two containers of flour and two containers of batter, one each of which seafood never touches. Before the soft launch Chef Stimpy from Bluffington insisted all customers just kind of know everything is prone to be seafood contaminated. Well, chef Ren was a customer that night and this absolutely was not communicated to customers. He claimed to have a slight seafood allergy and was not informed of what the crab soup was. In reality he does not have a seafood allergy. I didn’t discuss the seafood issue with Ren, separately we noticed egregious violations of food safety standards and we each responded in our own way. The soft launch service was so awful that night Chef Ren walked out of a free meal to pay for some ramen, never to return to Bikini Bottom. I attribute this oversight, and many of Bikini Bottom’s (and probably O-Town’s) problems to hubris over the Bluffington location.
Chef Chokey would also be hesitant to join the KK team. It will cost a finder’s fee just for me to reveal Chef Chokey’s name. Chef Chokey was a lead in the rapid expansion of Chokey Chicken restaurants. He opened numerous restaurants and was big on the philosophy that each restaurant must have its own personality in order to fit the unique local culture and the variety of working spaces. This is in direct conflict with the KK way that everything must be exactly like the Bluffington location no matter what. There was only one Chokey Chicken location that had the full menu, Chokey Springfield. Chokey Springfield had a large space which was intelligently designed to accommodate such a large menu. The KK menu is all over the place, closing in on 50 menu items which comes up as a failure on the Chokey Chicken/Chum Bucket scale. This is not the only area KK comes up as a major failure on the Chokey Chicken/Chum Bucket scale.
Has anyone in this company ever worked festival traffic before? Does anyone have the experience of working next to a major venue with 8000 seats before this one? The way Bikini Bottom handles Dimmadome services it certainly appears that the decision-makers fall on the wrong side of the Dunning-Kruger effect. Having all 50 items available during such massive traffic is completely asinine. An unwillingness to serve a partial menu is hindering the Bikini Bottom kitchen staff. I have worked festival traffic before, and Dimmadome events bring in festival traffic. I’ve worked inside a festival whose line never ended but every customer got their order in 5 minutes or less because the line kept flowing with only four items on the menu as that’s what was warranted at the B-Sharps Music Festival. I refuse to be set up for failure the way Bikini Bottom sets up Dimmadome services for failure. The entire week of concerts in [summer] 2022 I was set up for failure every day (it was after this I modified my availability to keep my sanity and my paycheck). When I brought my concerns about running efficiently during Dimmadome services I was labeled a B-worker for the first time in my employment history by Icus and Krabs. It is that moment which I was either going to holler at them both for being 2-dimensional thinkers who were obviously unqualified for the positions they accepted in this company, or just put my head down. If Bikini Bottom has a successful concert day service, hail your team because they snatched victory from the jaws of defeat. They swam with concrete shoes. I often wonder how many customers had bad experiences and never returned after concert days. A Dimmadome service should have no more than 25 items and have one or two specials to divert traffic towards an area the kitchen can keep moving. An Open Cup Open Plate (OCOP) special for foot traffic is absolutely needed. When I suggested OCOP special, Heffer was intrigued by this idea and immediately named burgers as the special to keep foot traffic flowing. Smithers wouldn’t hear this idea, babbling on about what’s advertised instead of hearing out a sound idea. This prattle despite radio commercials having inaccurate hours and social media promoting Bikini Bottom’s steak tacos to this day. I always found Smithers to be a better fit as a middle management office pencil pusher than as a hands-on restaurant manager. Overall I find KK managers are selected to be automatons not to question their orders rather than critical thinkers who could take the restaurant to the next level. During brunch service is another period of time that must be modified to lessen the heft of items. Having a full menu that barely works plus brunch is so deep into Chum Bucket territory, in my opinion we now have to use the Tropic Thunder scale of full retard to describe a 60-plus-item brunch. Chef Ren hired back a Chum Bucket cook who had a mental breakdown and stormed out during brunch (plus full menu) service because Ren knew the employee was justified and upper management was completely unreasonable in their brunch requests. It’s not just questionable decisions that hinder KK staff but improper equipment as well.
This is the first restaurant I have worked at which uses a touch screen on the line rather than tickets. From day one I found this to be technology for technology’s sake inferior to tickets. Chef Ren forced a new Chum Bucket location to rip out touch screens from the line and bring in ticket printers because of the higher efficiency. The touch screen is a great idea for expo, not the entire line. My biggest gripe is that each station does not get all the information. Early on I was regularly yelled at for not staggering my items, well I can’t see the rest of the order; a problem I have never had with a ticket system. Touchscreen software is also much more prone to errors and glitches. When I reported an error during a heavy service Icus and Krabs blamed my skills on the line without looking into the malfunctioning screen further. It was glitchy for weeks before the two finally investigated and corrected the issue I brought to their attention long before. Those two gave me an immense amount of ammunition to dislike them in the opening weeks until I stopped caring. The issue I had with being unable to scroll beyond the bottom of a completely filled screen has returned and is still there as of [my last day]. There are also important details that get buried. A frequent meltdown I have is that sauce on side requests and other important modifications are not capitalized or in red to catch the eye as they have been at jobs with tickets. These details get lost on Bikini Bottom’s touchscreens. A sauce on side salad made by me will be wrong 50% of the time because of the instructions being camouflaged in a word salad. This goes for coleslaw on the side and drizzle on the side too. Drizzle in general I dislike because of the pretentiousness, but whatever, drizzle it on top rather than putting it in a ramekin if you must. There are numerous places where Bikini Bottom overcomplicates matters for reasons I cannot ascertain.
Why is there such a large variety of plates? Why do we have a medium circular plate for salads and a large bowl for salads with protein? This just confuses the simplest of matters. I was told this is done because of the high price hike with protein, a larger presentation was desired. But that price hike is the price of protein in 2023. Bikini Bottom should put all salads in the large bowls and use all the circular salad plates in a skeet shooting promotion. I understand why we have both a circular platter plate and a pizza plate but in my restaurant the circular platter plates must go...or maybe the large platter plate instead. Is the large platter used for anything besides fish and chips? That extra space on fish and chips plates are only used for side sauces which can easily be delivered to customers on small circular plates. What is the medium oval plate doing that the medium rectangular plate isn’t? And vice versa. Why do they both exist when they are approximately the same size? Let me write an internet commercial where we break a lot of plates so we can get some logical use out of the superfluous plates. I don’t care which one is destroyed, the ovals or the rectangles but one of them is an unnecessary redundancy in excess done again. Speaking of commercials, the unimaginative radio advertisements for Bikini Bottom are doing little to lure new customers to the restaurant.
The three radio spots I have heard on KBBL all sound like they were produced by a marketing 101 student who wasn’t a natural in the field. The voiceover actor was so uncharismatic I was certain someone from the office was chosen at random to read the copy. Then I heard that same voiceover actor selling pool supplies on another radio station so I concluded that Bikini Bottom must have hired the cheapest guy in town to produce the most basic of commercials. Perhaps there is someone else you could hire more qualified to voiceover these commercials, an actor with experience on an Emmy award winning cable program whose unique place in the film industry was written about on [website] would be a much wiser choice to be the voice of the KK? (See external link). In the ad there was no catchphrase, no jingle, no music whatsoever. This simple approach to commercials lacks the pizazz to catch the attention of radio listeners. The first two commercials I heard would get a C in marketing 101 as they were nearly the exact same and accomplished the bare minimum to sell wares, the third one would maybe get a B- because there was some sort of attempted gimmick with the voiceover whispering to represent thinking inside his head about what he was going to eat later at KK. Not only does this commercial give no reason for the man to think inside his head, the outside world still and unpopulated. To see what a creative person would do with this concept see the attached script. There is an attempted slogan that could become part of an ad campaign. Commercials aren’t the only lost opportunities in promotions.
There are numerous promotional celebrity tie-ins at Bikini Bottom’s fingertips with Dimmadome performers. The restaurant could have a Phish sandwich as a OCOP special on [Phish performance dates], or a pretentious Jelly Roll on [Jelly Roll performance date]. Has anyone reached out to the Dimmadome theater or talent management for approved special menu items to be promoted inside the dome? Perhaps a special 20% discount to ticket holders? Is Bikini Bottom capable of getting permits to extend Open Container hours beyond [cutoff time] for an afterparty or block party throughout a Dimmadome concert? I see additional marketing opportunities left on the table for all new locations.
I believe new KK locations are missing out on a marketing campaign by opening with the entire cumbersome 50 item menu. This is a staggering amount of menu items which is too much to ask new staffers to perfect all at once. After a few months expanding the menu by approximately ten items is catching to customers who haven’t returned after a single visit or infrequently stop into KK. There are ten new food items that might appeal to them. Just like it appears KK doesn’t know what it’s looking for in a good commercial spot, this company doesn’t appear to recognize a talented from an untalented worker until it’s too late.
It is my understanding that KK had a headhunter to find Icus, the first Bikini Bottom kitchen manager. If it were up to me I’d hire someone to break the legs of that headhunter for bringing in a subpar kitchen lead. We are still attempting to recover from the lousy choices she made in the floor plan. If anybody responsible for Bikini Bottom’s floor plan is still giving input, stop them immediately. Once the doors were open to the public Icus had his head in the clouds to a point where I questioned if he saw the writing on the walls of an imminent demotion and stopped trying as a result. I had a full deck of 3x5 cards in an archaic powerpoint presentation bringing numerous concerns to light that he kept putting off listening to until he was fired. Those same cards were broken out for this essay. The second kitchen manager, Krumm, is a good lesson in honesty. According to Heffer, Krumm was given a bill of goods about how smoothly KK Bikini Bottom was running. Since Krumm stepped into a latrine pit which he was led to believe was a heated pool, he left in short time. Krumm also had plans to modify the menu but when his bosses told him to be a rodeo clown rather than a cowboy Krumm didn’t take too kindly to that. Meanwhile Heffer was the savior of the Bikini Bottom kitchen. I didn’t agree with every single decision he made, but I did with a majority of them. Heffer’s overhaul was such a blessing so I didn’t have to fiddle with the organization of 60% of the equipment anymore, only about 20% now. Too bad Heffer’s crippling depression came back after bashing his head into the wall out of frustration with the shackles KK restrained him with.
The current management team is enthusiastic but inexperienced. I see an accumulation of small infractions that might bring down Bikini Bottom’s health department rating significantly. I see the entire management team being inattentive or unaware about organizational issues. Whatever bureaucratic nonsense corporate tasks everyone with from the original sous chef Skeeter to Patty Mayonnaise that makes them walk away from the line between 11am and 1pm especially is infuriating. I have never been left alone on a multi-person line during peak hours so regularly, and I won’t tolerate it anymore. As much as I believe in his drive, I imagine our current kitchen manager SpongeBob will be let go after a disastrous service during the Dimmadome concert season that someone has to take the fall for. Chef Ren and I could help bring experience in management and dealing with festival traffic...if corporate does not force us to follow a failing strategy.
After working nearly a year at KK you may ask why I’m not proficient on more than one station. Excellent question. First, when I move over to another station the squeeze bottles are never labeled (until Stu Pickles was hired, now they’re sometimes labeled), so I always looked at the glut of unlabeled sauces and I’d go back to my station because the basic information is missing (also a health department violation for having numerous unlabeled, unchilled bottles). In his first week the new general manager Stu Pickles pulled out 90% of the containers under the grill station because they were lacking labels despite an expected health department visit. The second reason for my menu ignorance is the mountain of prep for my own and upcoming shifts I have piled up on my station throughout service. My attention to detail appears to be next level with my ability to anticipate stocking all items for all shifts including the weeknd. The third reason I wouldn’t learn multiple stations is a defense against the afternoon conference calls. In [month] the Bikini Bottom line was unprepared for a busy post lunch because one cook was cut and our expo person was busy with a conference call. The two of us remaining on the line had a miserable slog through an unexpectedly busy afternoon. When I brought this up to Krabs he disregarded me, being a good bean counter he quoted the cost percentage. What he didn’t take into account was the missing expo person who could have jumped on the line and expo to help the understaffed two man team. That person was stuck on a conference call. Just recently I saw the company actively lose money because of this poorly thought-out meeting during business hours. A customer wanted to order a dessert that was 86ed but had been restocked by our prep cook an hour before. The server was unable to sell them their dessert because the only person in the building who could help un-86 an item was on a conference call. This conference call calamity is another bone-headed choice that speaks to a larger decision-making problem within the corporate structure. Finish the conference calls by 10:45 am eastern.
In conclusion, I quit my position as a lowly grunt for this company because of its unwarranted perplexing dance steps and below average management. I don’t care how much varnish and lacquer is supplied, I refuse to polish this Bikini Bottom turd as a manager or full-time employee under the current circumstances. You would have to take a pickaxe to the floor, possibly relocate the bathrooms to add a door to the dishpit, get rid of the cheap low boy that doesn’t properly drain excess water, and Mr Gorbachov knock down that wall in the middle of the kitchen to give the proper amount of space to work. Or simply reduce the menu to 36 items (including sides) because that’s the amount of space this dreadful design can comfortably output. Would Gordon Ramsay compliment KK for all the unnecessary convoluted complications abound, or would Chef Ramsay yell about keeping it simple and demand KK chuck it in the flip? Thanks to the numerous pop up restaurants I have been a part of and the hectic world of trade shows/conventions, I may have more experience than anyone else employed by KK in smoothly opening a new location. I would enjoy being part of the opening team to ensure new locations have an efficiency Bikini Bottom lacks, and to keep upper management away from their worst instincts. Work with me and Chef Ren and we will help you become a well oiled machine like Chokey Chicken instead of the Chum Bucket cesspit Bikini Bottom currently embodies.
submitted by DillonFromSomewhere to iQuit [link] [comments]


2023.06.01 17:20 DillonFromSomewhere Restaurant Resignation Letter in Academic Essay Format

I know quitting your job as a cook usually simply comes with two weeks notice or a ragequit walkout, but for eleven months I worked at a new franchise that had such potential which was being squandered by the incompetence of upper management. I present the nearly 6000 word thesis I turned in on my last day. Locations and names have been changed to cartoon references. Brackets represent ambiguous information in place of specific details.
Krusty Krab Careers Jobs
Opening in [Month/Year], Krusty Krab (KK) Bikini Bottom is on its 4th kitchen manager in less than a year. Krusty Krab O-Town has recently let go its inaugural kitchen manager and sous chef. Almost no member of the Bikini Bottom opening management team remains employed by KK. There is a pattern developing where one must question both the choice of employee and the directive given to new franchises. These lingering issues I brought concerns about in the first weeks of opening but was disregarded at every turn despite my experience with festival traffic. As a result I decided this was not a place I wanted to advance, but with a good-enough paycheck I’d be a lowly grunt in the kitchen four days a week, at five days a week I would have quit or been fired over a public outburst long ago. If Krusty Krab alters course slightly while being true to the brand this could be a successful chain.
My unique employment history in brick and mortar restaurants, food trucks, pop up culinary concepts, trade shows/conventions, and the film industry make me an ideal candidate to be on the opening team for new KK locations. My outgoing nature and foresight are valuable assets. For example, on training week before opening when I was standing around idly without a task I took it upon myself to organize the disarray that was dry storage. Overhearing Krabs tell another manager where he wanted the cleaning products placed, I had a jumping off point and the organization I created nine months ago is still largely in place. Since returning from my vacation in early February I have made it my mission to keep the storage area organized because it was again starting to resemble a hoarder’s house rather than a commercial kitchen. This is now part of my weekly routines because every time I turn my back there is more product being placed haphazardly just anywhere with little regard. I also recently reorganized the walk-in cooler because of problematic stocking with items being placed on the same shelf or below raw proteins. I also simply put all the like products together such as cheeses or fruits that were scattered amongst several shelves. With recent overordering I cannot keep up with the organization of the walk in cooler. The pattern recognition of food types and even simple shapes appears to be lost on the Bikini Bottom crew. My daily reorganization of containers is proof of this. Most days I’ll take a few minutes to put all cylinders together, all cambros together in descending volume, all deep and shallow pans next to each other rather than intermixed. My decision to be a kitchen manager at age 19 from 2005 thru 2008 and rarely enter restaurant management since is very calculated.
With my prior knowledge of professional kitchens I was becoming Bikini Bottom’s resident nag to coworkers as I made note of health department violations on a daily basis. I stopped after being largely ignored for two weeks. My regular health department nags include; a battle with jackets and hats being placed only in the designated area (a designated area that did not exist until I created a place for personal items a in January by neatly organizing the dry storage area again), waiting until prepped items are cooled before a cover is placed on top, placement of raw seafood, open containers (very often sugar, flour, and pancake mix bags ripped open and left), and dirty dishes/containers placed back in rotation. The dirty dishes and containers in rotation with the clean ones are at an atrociously high number. I have given up on making the 4th fryer seafood allergy safe too. With the low volume of seafood allergy safe items Bikini Bottom should purchase smaller baskets to visually discourage cross contamination with the other fryers and baskets. My skills to organize the kitchen do not end with simply where to store products to meet minimal health department standards.
Half of the space in the Bikini Bottom kitchen is completely wasted on an ill-advised walkway to the dishpit. An intelligent design would place a second doorway directly to the dishpit connected to the bar or where the bathrooms reside. Numerous times during the opening week of KK Bikini Bottom I said, yelled, sang, and muttered that we have too many food items for the amount of space we have. Icus stated that there was more space than Bluffington. Is Bluffington intelligently designed? Because Bikini Bottom most certainly isn’t. So Bikini Bottom actually has less space even if there is more square footage. See the attached diagram for an intelligent design that could potentially house a menu of this size. Bikini Bottom forces a line design on this kitchen when an open concept is needed for this menu. It’s as if this floorplan was created by a person who had only ever seen one commercial kitchen previously and couldn’t think 4th dimensionally to understand the needs of the workers to smoothly serve customers.
There is not enough counter space for pizzas without getting off the line, the microwave is placed completely out of the way, the freezer’s curved design is a waste of potential counter space and a falling hazard for containers stored on top of it, the toaster is an overcomplicated and overexpensive piece of machinery that serves exactly one purpose when a flat top could be used to toast bread and other purposes like a quesadilla special, sautee was designed without an overhang for spices, the pantry station lacks the counter space to have two containers of flour and two containers of batter for seafood allergies, there are no Frialator fryers which I have worked with at every single kitchen job previously instead we got the cheap Vulcan model (is that logical), the cheap low boy in pantry that doesn’t drain excess water anywhere it’s just supposed to evaporate somehow but doesn’t, the grill and fryer should be placed next to each other (with a higher volume of crossover than other stations), the floors are flat instead on having a mild decline towards the drains (just look at the standing water residing behind the oven right now), in the dishpit the spraying area and the filled sinks are backwards of a logical dipshit, the ramp to the back door is on the wrong side, there is no refrigerated place downstairs to stage extra food for busy shifts (the beer cooler is once again used for such food items because of this massive oversight), the prep station is an afterthought and miniscule, the dishes on the line are difficult to grab for anyone under 5’11” and inaccessible for anyone under 5’6” (instead of putting them underneath tables that also give that desperately needed counterspace I spoke of), there is not enough space to store to-go containers or boats behind the line, expo is lacking a low boy for the numerous items that are supposed to be cold but are instead kept at room temperature all day long, no one in management thought about buying shelves until right before Bikini Bottom opened as a result the clean full sheets sat on the floor for days, we had only the exact amount of 1⁄6 pans for an absurd amount of time making it impossible to rotate and clean them when necessary (which is daily), we still struggle with 1/9 pan supply. And just when I thought I documented all the poor design choices possible I stumbled upon a person whose office holiday party was booked at KK Bikini Bottom. The deck space works just fine as a deck. It does not double well as a gathering space. The space is too long and narrow for parties, it promotes little splitoff groups rather than a coming together of a larger gathering. It may be advantageous to contact a social psychologist for help designing a private party space that promotes intermingling rather than enforcing small pockets to form. The reorganization of the physical kitchen isn’t all that screams for an overhaul.
There are six positions on the line at the Krusty Krab; expo, oven, grill, sautee, fryer, and pantry. But the pantry and fryer positions are forced together like a bad remix. Everyone who mainly works pantry deserves a $6 raise immediately because it is a station and a half. Both Icus and Krumm, while kitchen manager, kind of acknowledged the pantry is too big for one station without outright mentioning the lopsided distribution of work. I imagine in the only location where this works, Bluffington, a second person joins the pantry at noon because of the unreasonable amount of items one person is tasked with. Bikini Bottom only has one person in this position at all times, maybe modify it for one person? The excess of items on the pantry position largely resembles a position I would call “set-up” or “build” at a previous job that made sensible choices. This build position should have tostadas, tacos, butcher’s blocks, toast, salads, lettuce wrap set ups, and preparing plating for whichever station is most bogged down. I have absolutely lost my mind yelling about salads at least once a month, ranting that they do not belong on the fryer position because of how illogical it is that five salads are included on the mountain of other items the pantry has. I have always considered working in a kitchen a kind of dance, and the pantry station demands an unnecessarily convoluted dance to keep up with the demand. Without the salads, tostadas, and tacos the station is already the busiest. Do we really need to combine ballet and swing by including these extra awkward dance steps in this single station? For a kitchen designed this poorly I suppose it is. Again, see attached document for an intelligently designed kitchen that might be able to accommodate this menu. Unless Bikini Bottom is going to close for a month to fix the baffling floor plan design the menu is shouting to be reduced to 30-36 items.
The menu is too big. Krusty Krab is the jack of all foods, master of none. In general I believe individual locations should be allowed 18% omissions, and 18% unique items to this wildly unwieldy menu sitting around 50 food items including sides. The insistence on keeping menu items that don’t sell at Bikini Bottom because of Bluffington is mind boggling. Chicken tenders do not sell at Bikini Bottom. fried sushi does not sell at Bikini Bottom, not enough to justify their place on the line. I don’t care how well these items work in Bluffinton. They. Do. Not. Work. At. Bikini. Bottom. If the KK location in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean sells an incredible amount of live krill does that mean Bikini Bottom and O-Town must sell live krill too? Take the fried sushi off the menu. I had a complete meltdown about this during a Dimmadome service and my valid point was met with indifference. Replace the kid’s tenders with a kid’s fish sticks. We already have the tilapia fish sticks on the line for tacos. Or make the kid’s fish sticks cod. We cut cod to order for fish tacos in spite of health code violations because it is too rare of an order to make beforehand. Saffron in mashed potatoes? If you must. Why are green tomatoes only on the menu during lunch? Bikini Bottom throws away a sizable amount of spoiled green tomatoes each week. Have green tomatoes on the menu all day long or don’t have them at all. The smoked salmon could go on salads or a special taco to justify its place on the line. The corn pico’s place on the line is unjustified. It only goes on one item, tostadas, which are not particularly popular. If we had a taco salad we could throw the corn pico on there. We also have unreasonable waste from unusable taco shells, smash up those imperfect taco shells and throw them on said taco salad. But before we add salads, let's get rid of the pear and kale salads. The pears' position on the line are unjustified, if we threw them on a taco variation maybe their place on the Bikini Bottom line could be argued but for now they only go on a salad that isn’t particularly popular. The kale salad is an issue of space for a 4th green for salads is too much. The krusty salad is my most hated house salad of all time. And it comes down to the toast with goat cheese. This ancillary step of spreading goat cheese on a cracker is an unnecessary step for an overly complicated dance and should be part of the expo dance if expo wasn’t a shoddily designed afterthought lacking a low boy.
There are a plethora of squeeze bottles on the pantry station that have no place on the overloaded station. They belong to an expo station with a low boy to keep them cold. Pantry has an overwhelming ten squeeze bottles: chipotle crema, sweet chili vinaigrette, buffalo, korean bbq, ranch, caesar, wine vinaigrette, lemon vinaigrette, honey mustard, and lemon aioli. Only the first four are justified on an intelligently designed fryer section, the second four belong on the build station, the last two have no place anywhere but expo. With this extra space sautee could keep their bottles and two purees cold in the fryer's lowboy instead of leaving them at room temperature all day inviting a pathogen party. This theorized intelligently designed expo would have room to keep these four squeeze bottles and a double of every sauce chilled to pour them into ramekins, a move that is highly common in the expo dance. The fact that expo doesn’t have a double of all squeeze bottles is foolish. Expo has to bother an overloaded station to pour these side sauces instead.
How many gallons of basil aioli has Bikini Bottom thrown away in 11 months? Four aiolis in general is way too many and most go on a single item; basil aioli on the incredibly unpopular veggie burger, lemon aioli for calamari, sweet chili aioli for the BLT that is only served half of the day, and garlic aioli actually goes on two items…I believe. What a colossal waste of precious little space, lose two aiolis and then you can sing the logical song with me. Perhaps we can put garlic aioli and sweet chili vinaigrette on the BLT separately and accomplish the exact same thing the sweet chili aioli does. The wings too have unneeded complications. Having worked at a sports bar specializing in wings for the better part of a decade I find KK’s plating of wings to be overly pretentious. The carrots, celery, and blue cheese have lost function. Heffer Wolf always said no one eats the carrot/celery julienne with blue cheese. It’s a complete waste of all the ingredients because you’ve gone too far with the presentation. Wings aren’t fancy. Wings are supposed to have a small pool of sauce and be sloppy. It’s like a sloppy joe that’s not sloppy, an unsloppy joe is a failure to sloppy joes just as the KK presentation of wings is a disparagement to the dish. Ever since training week back in 2022 I have used a scale to give Bikini Bottom a passing or failing grade.
Chokey Chicken to Chum Bucket is the scale I use to judge efficiency and sanity at Bikini Bottom. Both establishments are upscale casual dining experiences in Capitol City in the same vein as KK. Chokey had high employee retention and relatively smooth openings for new locations. Chum Bucket’s employee turnover was high and every location opening was chaotic. Which one sounds closer to KK? Chokey Chicken was filled with chefs I respect including Chef Ren Hoek who remains a close friend to this day. Ren lost his lifelong passion for kitchen work after working management at Chum Bucket. He’s actually seeking work in Bikini Bottom. Call him up at [phone number], but KK will give him Nam’ flashbacks of why he chose driving for a living rather than cooking for five years. The pair of us together helming Bikini Bottom with the ability to omit and create 18% of the overloaded menu can bring success to this franchise. We have worked well numerous times in the past on various concepts in the past including creating The Attack of the Pickled Tomatoes Burger for [Promotional live performance of a TV show] at the Capitol City Theater. We served 100 people in 60 at the [sitcom filming] lunch. That’s physically impossible but somehow we did it quite a few times.
A fun anecdote about Ren Hoek’s KK experience from the soft launch; on training week numerous times I brought concerns about being seafood allergy safe that were dismissed. As mentioned earlier the pantry station lacks the counter space to have two containers of flour and two containers of batter, one each of which seafood never touches. Before the soft launch Chef Stimpy from Bluffington insisted all customers just kind of know everything is prone to be seafood contaminated. Well, chef Ren was a customer that night and this absolutely was not communicated to customers. He claimed to have a slight seafood allergy and was not informed of what the crab soup was. In reality he does not have a seafood allergy. I didn’t discuss the seafood issue with Ren, separately we noticed egregious violations of food safety standards and we each responded in our own way. The soft launch service was so awful that night Chef Ren walked out of a free meal to pay for some ramen, never to return to Bikini Bottom. I attribute this oversight, and many of Bikini Bottom’s (and probably O-Town’s) problems to hubris over the Bluffington location.
Chef Chokey would also be hesitant to join the KK team. It will cost a finder’s fee just for me to reveal Chef Chokey’s name. Chef Chokey was a lead in the rapid expansion of Chokey Chicken restaurants. He opened numerous restaurants and was big on the philosophy that each restaurant must have its own personality in order to fit the unique local culture and the variety of working spaces. This is in direct conflict with the KK way that everything must be exactly like the Bluffington location no matter what. There was only one Chokey Chicken location that had the full menu, Chokey Springfield. Chokey Springfield had a large space which was intelligently designed to accommodate such a large menu. The KK menu is all over the place, closing in on 50 menu items which comes up as a failure on the Chokey Chicken/Chum Bucket scale. This is not the only area KK comes up as a major failure on the Chokey Chicken/Chum Bucket scale.
Has anyone in this company ever worked festival traffic before? Does anyone have the experience of working next to a major venue with 8000 seats before this one? The way Bikini Bottom handles Dimmadome services it certainly appears that the decision-makers fall on the wrong side of the Dunning-Kruger effect. Having all 50 items available during such massive traffic is completely asinine. An unwillingness to serve a partial menu is hindering the Bikini Bottom kitchen staff. I have worked festival traffic before, and Dimmadome events bring in festival traffic. I’ve worked inside a festival whose line never ended but every customer got their order in 5 minutes or less because the line kept flowing with only four items on the menu as that’s what was warranted at the B-Sharps Music Festival. I refuse to be set up for failure the way Bikini Bottom sets up Dimmadome services for failure. The entire week of concerts in [summer] 2022 I was set up for failure every day (it was after this I modified my availability to keep my sanity and my paycheck). When I brought my concerns about running efficiently during Dimmadome services I was labeled a B-worker for the first time in my employment history by Icus and Krabs. It is that moment which I was either going to holler at them both for being 2-dimensional thinkers who were obviously unqualified for the positions they accepted in this company, or just put my head down. If Bikini Bottom has a successful concert day service, hail your team because they snatched victory from the jaws of defeat. They swam with concrete shoes. I often wonder how many customers had bad experiences and never returned after concert days. A Dimmadome service should have no more than 25 items and have one or two specials to divert traffic towards an area the kitchen can keep moving. An Open Cup Open Plate (OCOP) special for foot traffic is absolutely needed. When I suggested OCOP special, Heffer was intrigued by this idea and immediately named burgers as the special to keep foot traffic flowing. Smithers wouldn’t hear this idea, babbling on about what’s advertised instead of hearing out a sound idea. This prattle despite radio commercials having inaccurate hours and social media promoting Bikini Bottom’s steak tacos to this day. I always found Smithers to be a better fit as a middle management office pencil pusher than as a hands-on restaurant manager. Overall I find KK managers are selected to be automatons not to question their orders rather than critical thinkers who could take the restaurant to the next level. During brunch service is another period of time that must be modified to lessen the heft of items. Having a full menu that barely works plus brunch is so deep into Chum Bucket territory, in my opinion we now have to use the Tropic Thunder scale of full retard to describe a 60-plus-item brunch. Chef Ren hired back a Chum Bucket cook who had a mental breakdown and stormed out during brunch (plus full menu) service because Ren knew the employee was justified and upper management was completely unreasonable in their brunch requests. It’s not just questionable decisions that hinder KK staff but improper equipment as well.
This is the first restaurant I have worked at which uses a touch screen on the line rather than tickets. From day one I found this to be technology for technology’s sake inferior to tickets. Chef Ren forced a new Chum Bucket location to rip out touch screens from the line and bring in ticket printers because of the higher efficiency. The touch screen is a great idea for expo, not the entire line. My biggest gripe is that each station does not get all the information. Early on I was regularly yelled at for not staggering my items, well I can’t see the rest of the order; a problem I have never had with a ticket system. Touchscreen software is also much more prone to errors and glitches. When I reported an error during a heavy service Icus and Krabs blamed my skills on the line without looking into the malfunctioning screen further. It was glitchy for weeks before the two finally investigated and corrected the issue I brought to their attention long before. Those two gave me an immense amount of ammunition to dislike them in the opening weeks until I stopped caring. The issue I had with being unable to scroll beyond the bottom of a completely filled screen has returned and is still there as of [my last day]. There are also important details that get buried. A frequent meltdown I have is that sauce on side requests and other important modifications are not capitalized or in red to catch the eye as they have been at jobs with tickets. These details get lost on Bikini Bottom’s touchscreens. A sauce on side salad made by me will be wrong 50% of the time because of the instructions being camouflaged in a word salad. This goes for coleslaw on the side and drizzle on the side too. Drizzle in general I dislike because of the pretentiousness, but whatever, drizzle it on top rather than putting it in a ramekin if you must. There are numerous places where Bikini Bottom overcomplicates matters for reasons I cannot ascertain.
Why is there such a large variety of plates? Why do we have a medium circular plate for salads and a large bowl for salads with protein? This just confuses the simplest of matters. I was told this is done because of the high price hike with protein, a larger presentation was desired. But that price hike is the price of protein in 2023. Bikini Bottom should put all salads in the large bowls and use all the circular salad plates in a skeet shooting promotion. I understand why we have both a circular platter plate and a pizza plate but in my restaurant the circular platter plates must go...or maybe the large platter plate instead. Is the large platter used for anything besides fish and chips? That extra space on fish and chips plates are only used for side sauces which can easily be delivered to customers on small circular plates. What is the medium oval plate doing that the medium rectangular plate isn’t? And vice versa. Why do they both exist when they are approximately the same size? Let me write an internet commercial where we break a lot of plates so we can get some logical use out of the superfluous plates. I don’t care which one is destroyed, the ovals or the rectangles but one of them is an unnecessary redundancy in excess done again. Speaking of commercials, the unimaginative radio advertisements for Bikini Bottom are doing little to lure new customers to the restaurant.
The three radio spots I have heard on KBBL all sound like they were produced by a marketing 101 student who wasn’t a natural in the field. The voiceover actor was so uncharismatic I was certain someone from the office was chosen at random to read the copy. Then I heard that same voiceover actor selling pool supplies on another radio station so I concluded that Bikini Bottom must have hired the cheapest guy in town to produce the most basic of commercials. Perhaps there is someone else you could hire more qualified to voiceover these commercials, an actor with experience on an Emmy award winning cable program whose unique place in the film industry was written about on [website] would be a much wiser choice to be the voice of the KK? (See external link). In the ad there was no catchphrase, no jingle, no music whatsoever. This simple approach to commercials lacks the pizazz to catch the attention of radio listeners. The first two commercials I heard would get a C in marketing 101 as they were nearly the exact same and accomplished the bare minimum to sell wares, the third one would maybe get a B- because there was some sort of attempted gimmick with the voiceover whispering to represent thinking inside his head about what he was going to eat later at KK. Not only does this commercial give no reason for the man to think inside his head, the outside world still and unpopulated. To see what a creative person would do with this concept see the attached script. There is an attempted slogan that could become part of an ad campaign. Commercials aren’t the only lost opportunities in promotions.
There are numerous promotional celebrity tie-ins at Bikini Bottom’s fingertips with Dimmadome performers. The restaurant could have a Phish sandwich as a OCOP special on [Phish performance dates], or a pretentious Jelly Roll on [Jelly Roll performance date]. Has anyone reached out to the Dimmadome theater or talent management for approved special menu items to be promoted inside the dome? Perhaps a special 20% discount to ticket holders? Is Bikini Bottom capable of getting permits to extend Open Container hours beyond [cutoff time] for an afterparty or block party throughout a Dimmadome concert? I see additional marketing opportunities left on the table for all new locations.
I believe new KK locations are missing out on a marketing campaign by opening with the entire cumbersome 50 item menu. This is a staggering amount of menu items which is too much to ask new staffers to perfect all at once. After a few months expanding the menu by approximately ten items is catching to customers who haven’t returned after a single visit or infrequently stop into KK. There are ten new food items that might appeal to them. Just like it appears KK doesn’t know what it’s looking for in a good commercial spot, this company doesn’t appear to recognize a talented from an untalented worker until it’s too late.
It is my understanding that KK had a headhunter to find Icus, the first Bikini Bottom kitchen manager. If it were up to me I’d hire someone to break the legs of that headhunter for bringing in a subpar kitchen lead. We are still attempting to recover from the lousy choices she made in the floor plan. If anybody responsible for Bikini Bottom’s floor plan is still giving input, stop them immediately. Once the doors were open to the public Icus had his head in the clouds to a point where I questioned if he saw the writing on the walls of an imminent demotion and stopped trying as a result. I had a full deck of 3x5 cards in an archaic powerpoint presentation bringing numerous concerns to light that he kept putting off listening to until he was fired. Those same cards were broken out for this essay. The second kitchen manager, Krumm, is a good lesson in honesty. According to Heffer, Krumm was given a bill of goods about how smoothly KK Bikini Bottom was running. Since Krumm stepped into a latrine pit which he was led to believe was a heated pool, he left in short time. Krumm also had plans to modify the menu but when his bosses told him to be a rodeo clown rather than a cowboy Krumm didn’t take too kindly to that. Meanwhile Heffer was the savior of the Bikini Bottom kitchen. I didn’t agree with every single decision he made, but I did with a majority of them. Heffer’s overhaul was such a blessing so I didn’t have to fiddle with the organization of 60% of the equipment anymore, only about 20% now. Too bad Heffer’s crippling depression came back after bashing his head into the wall out of frustration with the shackles KK restrained him with.
The current management team is enthusiastic but inexperienced. I see an accumulation of small infractions that might bring down Bikini Bottom’s health department rating significantly. I see the entire management team being inattentive or unaware about organizational issues. Whatever bureaucratic nonsense corporate tasks everyone with from the original sous chef Skeeter to Patty Mayonnaise that makes them walk away from the line between 11am and 1pm especially is infuriating. I have never been left alone on a multi-person line during peak hours so regularly, and I won’t tolerate it anymore. As much as I believe in his drive, I imagine our current kitchen manager SpongeBob will be let go after a disastrous service during the Dimmadome concert season that someone has to take the fall for. Chef Ren and I could help bring experience in management and dealing with festival traffic...if corporate does not force us to follow a failing strategy.
After working nearly a year at KK you may ask why I’m not proficient on more than one station. Excellent question. First, when I move over to another station the squeeze bottles are never labeled (until Stu Pickles was hired, now they’re sometimes labeled), so I always looked at the glut of unlabeled sauces and I’d go back to my station because the basic information is missing (also a health department violation for having numerous unlabeled, unchilled bottles). In his first week the new general manager Stu Pickles pulled out 90% of the containers under the grill station because they were lacking labels despite an expected health department visit. The second reason for my menu ignorance is the mountain of prep for my own and upcoming shifts I have piled up on my station throughout service. My attention to detail appears to be next level with my ability to anticipate stocking all items for all shifts including the weeknd. The third reason I wouldn’t learn multiple stations is a defense against the afternoon conference calls. In [month] the Bikini Bottom line was unprepared for a busy post lunch because one cook was cut and our expo person was busy with a conference call. The two of us remaining on the line had a miserable slog through an unexpectedly busy afternoon. When I brought this up to Krabs he disregarded me, being a good bean counter he quoted the cost percentage. What he didn’t take into account was the missing expo person who could have jumped on the line and expo to help the understaffed two man team. That person was stuck on a conference call. Just recently I saw the company actively lose money because of this poorly thought-out meeting during business hours. A customer wanted to order a dessert that was 86ed but had been restocked by our prep cook an hour before. The server was unable to sell them their dessert because the only person in the building who could help un-86 an item was on a conference call. This conference call calamity is another bone-headed choice that speaks to a larger decision-making problem within the corporate structure. Finish the conference calls by 10:45 am eastern.
In conclusion, I quit my position as a lowly grunt for this company because of its unwarranted perplexing dance steps and below average management. I don’t care how much varnish and lacquer is supplied, I refuse to polish this Bikini Bottom turd as a manager or full-time employee under the current circumstances. You would have to take a pickaxe to the floor, possibly relocate the bathrooms to add a door to the dishpit, get rid of the cheap low boy that doesn’t properly drain excess water, and Mr Gorbachov knock down that wall in the middle of the kitchen to give the proper amount of space to work. Or simply reduce the menu to 36 items (including sides) because that’s the amount of space this dreadful design can comfortably output. Would Gordon Ramsay compliment KK for all the unnecessary convoluted complications abound, or would Chef Ramsay yell about keeping it simple and demand KK chuck it in the flip? Thanks to the numerous pop up restaurants I have been a part of and the hectic world of trade shows/conventions, I may have more experience than anyone else employed by KK in smoothly opening a new location. I would enjoy being part of the opening team to ensure new locations have an efficiency Bikini Bottom lacks, and to keep upper management away from their worst instincts. Work with me and Chef Ren and we will help you become a well oiled machine like Chokey Chicken instead of the Chum Bucket cesspit Bikini Bottom currently embodies.
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