All good things must come to an end. 🥲
As you surely know by now, this will be the very last Cup in The Silph Arena's long and glorious history. And so even though I slowly faded away from my monthy meta writeups for Silph some time ago (I think it's been over a year now! 🥹), I HAD to come back for one last ride together, my friends. Like many of you, I only ever got into PvP because of The Arena, and was a PvP veteran when GBL was still but a twinkle in John Hanke's eye. Many wonderful memories of tournaments and communities, local and remote, that I will cherish always.
And of course: YOU, my dear readers. I am sorry I stepped back, but you all surpassed beyond me and my relatively simple meta overviews. After a while, budget picks became less and less necessary to study as you had more and more tools already at your disposal, built up from the metas of the past.
In short, to paraphrase the great Yoda himself: I am what you grew beyond. That is the true burden of all teachers.
And perhaps, here at the end, you still don't need my simple budget heroes, my rather basic overview of the meta and, of course, off-meta potential wonders. You know, the thrifty AND the nifty stuff. 😉
But I can think of no better way to say a proper goodbye to the good folks at The Silph Arena AND you, my dear friends, than to give this one last go. Together.
One last..."Nifty Or Thrifty"! For old times' sake.
So here we go!
For those who don't remember, this article series serves a few functions. First, it gives a first blush, comprehensive look at the meta for the upcoming Innocent Cup, particularly from the perspective of which Pokémon are likely worth the cost of leveling up and adding a second charge move (nifty) and which ones would probably work out fine without heavy investment (thrifty), including some alternatives to the more expensive options. For those on a stardust budget — and/or folks trying to save up some dust for the future — it can be daunting trying to figure out where to spend or not spend it. We all want to field competitive teams of six, but where can we get the best bang for our buck and where should we perhaps instead channel our inner scrooge?
And as always, while I have tried to whittle somewhat, this is likely to be a long read, just to warn you up front! But always as per normal, I'll try to keep it entertaining as well. 😃
Before we dive in, make sure to familiarize yourself with what makes up Innocent Cup. It's Dragon, Fairy, Flying, Psychic, and Water type Pokémon, with with Arbok, Dragalge, Garbodor, and Swalot specifically whitelisted in as well. Excluded are Ice, Fire, Poison and Steel types, plus Altaria, Galarian Zapdos, Galarian Moltres, Galarian Articuno, Cresselia, Hawlucha, Lanturn, Mandibuzz, Mantine, Mew, Alolan Ninetales, Noctowl, Pelipper, Pidgeot, and Trevenant are all specifically banned. The full list and rules are over here, so check that out before reading on.
Now it's time to dive in, but only after one final, unapologetic musical intro. Hit it!
🎼 Oops, let's do this again
🎶 Silph played with our hearts
♫ We got lost in the game
♩ Oh baby, baby
♫ Oops, I think I'm in love
♬ Silph was sent from aboooooove
♪ I'm not that Innocent....
Okay, maybe not one of my greatest ever, but it was either this or a mushy goodbye song like "My Way" or something.
Anyway, in retro style, let's go through this final meta in order of cheapest second move cost all the way to the Legendaries. Here we go!

10,000 Dust/25 Candy

ALOLAN RAICHU
Volt Switch Thunder Punch & Wild Charge/Psychic
There is a LOT in AhChu's favor here. It resists Flying, Psychic, Electric, and Fighting damage — all very relevant in this format — and wails on all the Waters and Flyers around. As tempting as Grass Knot is for its ability to blow away the Mud Boys (and other Ground types), I think that if you choose NOT to use Wild Charge, it is Psychic (the move, to keep the old inside joke going!) that you want more, as it can at least slap around the important Poison types in the meta (beating ALL of them, whereas Dragalge and Swalot can escape otherwise). That said, the overall more threatening move remains Wild Charge, which obviously has its drawbacks, but is pretty widely unresisted and alone has the power to blow away things like Hypno, Azumarill, and Araquanid.
EMOLGA
Thunder Shock Discharge & Acrobatics
When I began this article (WAY too long ago now! ), Emolga was a mere footnote here. But that was then, and this is now with the addition of Acrobatics. I still don't know how high Emolga may soar now in PvP, but I know that with THIS meta, it should be off to an impressive start!
SWELLOW
Wing Attack Sky Attack & Brave Bird
Wait wait wait... Wing Attack and Sky Attack and Brave Bird? Why have you hardly seen any of these used? Well, it's much less tanky than Pidgeot and especially Noctowl, which is why they generally get all the press and poor Swellow usually languishes. But one thing that has always separated Silph from GBL are the spot bans, and in this Cup, it is Noctowl and Pidgeot that are on the outside looking in, allowing Swellow to soar high. And beyond the obvious Electrics and a few Fairies, there really isn't too much that it has to fear. Go fly past the competition!
DARTRIX
Leafage Brave Bird & Seed Bomb
Poor Decidueye may remain unexciting in PvP, but at least Dartrix now gets its moment in the spotlight as a budget (and with the addition of Leafage, perhaps even better?) Tropius here. I say "perhaps better" despite the fact that Razor Leaf Trop has a better record because of between the two, only Dartrix manages to overcome Dragalge and Clefable (and spicy Togetic). Trop instead shreds things like Hypno, Gliscor, Wobbuffet, Alolan Raichu, and Seaking, so there's certainly room for both, but Dartrix is absolutely the better fit on some teams.
WHIMSICOTT
Fairy Wind Moonblast & Seed Bomb/Grass Knot
I'm listing Charm and/or Hurricane as options here, but other than the latter sometimes winning the mirror, there's really nothing major they can do that Fairy Wind and Moonblast (along with one of the now-two Grass moves) can't. Only with the speedy charging of Fairy Wind can Whimsie outrace stuff like Azumarill, Tapu Fini, and Whiscash, and Moonblast is more reliable than Hurricane at taking out things like Wobbuffet, Zapdos, and importantly, have the advantage versus Dragalge. As for Grass Knot vs the new Seed Bomb, the former has the power to take down Wobb and Whiscash, while the latter instead now outraces (Fairy Wind) Slurpuff, (Ice Beam) Jellicent, and (Sludge Wave) Swampert. Go with Fairy Wind. You have plenty of other Charm options anyway. For example....
WIGGLYTUFF
Charm Ice Beam & Disarming Voice
Yes, you definitely want both Ice Beam and the new Disarming Voice for Wiggly to be well-rounded, but as is often the case with Charmers, it can often be best to go for the Charm-down, allowing additional wins against stuff like Dedenne, Tapu Fini, Florges. and several fellow Charmers (assuming they are not also trying to just Charm-down). Wiggly remains among the best, if not THE best, pure Charmer in yet another format.
CLEFABLE
Fairy Wind Meteor Mash & Moonblast
Fairy Wind is now the way to go here (and likely in many metas yet to come), as Meteor Mash can do some serious work, especially in whalloping the other Faires! You can run Psychic as well to also shock Poisons (Swalot and Dragalge in particular), but it's overall a bit weaker than Moonblast, which is needed for wins like Azu, Hypno, Wobbuffet, and most of the Electrics in the meta (Dedenne, Zapdos, and Emolga, specifically).
SWALOT
Infestation Sludge Bomb & Ice Beam/Gunk Shot
I've written about Swalot before, but only as an often-desperate attempt to show it as a decent thrifty Poison with upside. But never has it really SHOWN that upside like it does here in Innocent Cup. It can swallow all Grasses and Fairies whole, and can also topple things like DDeoxys, Alolan Raichu, Dedenne, Wobbuffet, Seaking, and fellow Poison Garbodor. Give it Ice Beam for coverage instead of big closer Gunk Shot, and while it gives up a couple Fairies (Azumarill, Tapu Fini) and Araquanid, it gains Ice-weak Zapdos and Zweilous instead. Swalot is not only finally a breakout star here at the end of Arena play, but you have legit options with it! You love to see it.
SWAMPERT
Mud Shot Hydro Cannonᴸ & Earthquake/Sludge Wave
It would be easy to assume that Sludge Wave is clearly THE way to go in this meta filled with Fairies and key Grass types. And there is wisdom in that, as Sludge does indeed conquer every Fairy here except the new Fairy Wind Togetic. But there remains just a strong a case for good old Earthquake instead, as it instead knocks out all the Poisons, plus Zweilous, Jellicent, and enemy Swamperts. The choice is even more in Quake's favor for Shadow Swampert, as it beats all the major Fairies besides Togekiss, Togetic, Azu, and Whimsie, still uniquely takes down Dragalge, Jellicent, and Swampert, and adds to that Whiscash and Rainy Castform as well. I understand the attention being given to Sludge Wave... Innocent Cup IS one of the better fits for it. Just don't put those blinders on too tightly. Earthquake still bears consideration too, depending on the rest of your team. And of course, there is also Shadow Swampert, which I think also prefers Earthquake, beating everything Quake non-Shadow Swampie can, PLUS Clefable, Tapu Fini, and Slurpuff as non-Shadow can only if it has Sludge Wave, AND completely unique wins versus Gliscor, Zapdos, and Rainy Castform too!
WHISCASH
Mud Shot Mud Bomb & Blizzard
Aside from the just-buffed Mud Bomb making Whiscash a bit better anyway, it has one other big thing going for it in this meta that separates it from Swampert: Blizzard, which simply destroys Flyers (Drifblim, Emolga, Jumpluff, Togekiss, Togetic) that Swampert can't touch, as well as Whimsicott for good measure. Sure, Whiscash can't match Swampert's wins versus things like Hypno, Florges, Tapu Fini, or Florges, and usually will lose to Swampert in the head to head, but at least it stands on pretty equal footing in this meta. Some teams will want one, some will want the other. Which do YOU prefer, my friend?
BLASTOISE
Water Gun Hydro Cannonᴸ & Ice Beam
As always, Blastoise is not exactly exciting, but it can get the job done in a pinch. Its excellent bulk allows it to hang in and beat every meta Fairy that isn't part Water or Grass, and also handles things like Drifblim, Swampert and Whiscash, Swalot and Garbodor, and thanks to Ice Beam, Dragalge, Jumpluff, and (Air Slash) Tropius as well. Nothing flashy, but solid as always. I do not particularly recommend Shadow Blastie.
GOLISOPOD
Shadow Claw X-Scissor & Liquidation
Golisopod is suddenly interesting now that it has all-new move Liquidation, which brings in new wins like Whiscash (it already beat Swampert), Swalot, Drifblim, and Gliscor. Add to this some surprising wins like Azumarill, Rainy Castform, and Alolan Raichu, and Golisopod may be more spicy than meta itself, but it's certainly on the upswing.
GYARADOS
Dragon Breath Aqua Tailᴸ & Crunch
Gyarados does just enough to be interesting, including taking out all the Poisons and Dragons in the meta, all Grounds but Quagsire, and stuff like Hypno, Wobbuffet, Jellicent, Rainy Castform, Drifblim, Araquanid. Slurpuff, and even Jumpluff. Not bad, right? Just don't get too cute with Shadow Gary.
SWOOBAT
Confusion Psychic Fangs & Aerial Ace
Hey, leave it to me for the oddball picks, especially among the "thrifty" 10ks. Swoobat is NOT a good PvP Pokémon, but it DOES come with Confusion to blow away the scary Poisons, and being a Flyer means it performs well against things like Swampert, Medicham, and the Grasses as well. It also manages to several of the big name Fairies and even Gliscor and Rainy Castform too. Not fantastic, but a lot of potential fun in this final Silph Cup.

50,000 Dust/50 Candy

SEAKING
Poison Jabᴸ Icy Windᴸ & Drill Runᴸ
One thing that doesn't change, despite all the new Fairy Wind around, is that Seaking still wipes away ALL the Fairies here, even really scary ones like Dedenne and Aromatisse/Slurpuff, even with fast-charging Fairy Wind and their scary Electric and Grass charge moves. With its adaptive moveset, it also handles big Poisons Dragalge and Garbodor, Flyers like Gliscor, Tropius, Emolga, and Jumpluff (and most non-Razor Leaf Grasses in this meta in general), and Dragons like Zweilous. Versatile and a LOT of fun, Seaking earns every bit of its current Top 3 Ranking in Innocent Cup!
JUMPLUFF
Fairy Wind Energy Ball & Acrobaticsᴸ
So here's one that DOES take a little hit with the redistribution of Fairy Wind (but Jumpie is still pretty good!). Jumpluff beats all the major Fairies except Florges... unless they're running Fairy Wind. But now it loses to FW Clefable, who is likely to suddenly be quite popular, and FW Togetic, who I feel like folks are going to bring as long-desired spice. It also has not a prayer against most Poisons (though it can handle Dragalge thanks to resisting Aqua Tail) but beats most Waters, Wobb, Medicham, Hypno, Zweilous, and even Tropius.
DEDENNE
Thunder Shock Discharge & Play Rough
When and I other analysts starting looking over this meta, we got very excited about Deedee. Upon further review, I personally like Alolan Raichu better overall, as it knocks out things Dedenne cannot like Hypno, Florges, Drifblim, Jumpluff, Seaking (Deedee does NOT like Poison damage!), Fini, Castform, and Clefable. Dedenne IS still quite good, with its better bulk and Fairy subtyping allowing it unique wins like Wobbuffet, Slurpluff, and Zweilous. And of course, you can always put Deedee AND AhChu on the same team of six....
FLORGES
Fairy Wind Disarming Voice & Moonblast
So Florges doesn't do anything particularly unique, as it is arguably best running with all Fairy moves. It CAN do some neat things with Vine Whip, like beating Jellicent and winning the mirror, but Fairy Wind is just better, instead taking out Jumpluff, Hypno, Wobbuffet, Whimsicott, Tropius and more.
As for other 50k Fairies:

• AROMATISSE is just kind of there. Thunderbolt is nice coverage in this meta in theory, but of course Charm makes it more of a Hail Mary than something to truly threaten all the Waters and Flyers with.
  
• SLURPUFF can operate with Fairy Wind, though it does so much less successfully than others. It's actually probably also best as a Charmer, just, again, a rather unexciting one. At least Flamethrower and Energy Ball are fantastic coverage options if you ever get to throw them!
  
• GRANBULL and TOGEKISS are even less exciting. Pass.
  

There is ONE other Fairy well worth mentioning here, though....
AZUMARILL
Bubble Ice Beam & Hydro Pump/Play Rough
If there's one lesson we learned early on in The Arena, it's that if you allow Azumarill into a meta, it will find a way to become relevant. And lo and behold, here is yet another example. Not even Swalot, Emolga, or Zapdos can safely overcome Azu! And that's on top of all the Fighters, Psychics, Flyers, Mud Boys and fellow Fairies that Azu can strike down. Azumarill is a strong contender here, as it has basically always been in these metas.
JELLICENT
Hex Surf &/or Shadow Ball &/or Ice Beam
I think I can pretty definitively recommend Hex as the fast move, but after that? Time for a classic side-by-side. My default recommendation is Surf/Shadow Ball, which can get to meaningful wins like Whiscash, Drifblim, and the mirror, but also valid are Surf/Ice Beam and even Beam/Ball work. Ice Beam is basically required to beat Whimsicott, Tropius, Jumpluff, and Dragalge, but can usually do it alongside Ball or Surf. Beam/Ball can beat most of what Surf/Ball and Surf/Beam can except Clefable, Florges, and Slurpuff. I think the basic question is thus: do you need extra coverage versus Grasses and Dragons? If so: Ice Beam. If not? Probably just stick with Surf/Shadow Ball. But there's no "wrong" answer, really. Good luck!
ARAQUANID
Bug Bite Bubble Beam & Mirror Coat/Bug Buzz
Gotta be that Bug Buzz is the closer to go with, right? Well, yes... but also perhaps no. It's true that only the raw power of Bug Buzz can overcome things like Seaking, Fairy Wind Whimsicott, and Clefable, but as bad a move as Mirror Coat is, it's ALSO true that 'Nid can overcome all the format's Poison types (and win the mirror match) only with Mirror Coat, not Buzz. Do with that information what you will, but I like when I get to highlight secret tech like that.
QUAGSIRE
Mud Shot Stone Edge & Mud Bomb/Earthquake
I still don't think it's quite right to call new Quag toy Mud Bomb a straight upgrade, as there are good things like Earthquake can still do that Bomb can't, like overpowering Azumarill and Swampert. But yes, Mud Bomb is probably the de facto standard now, getting its own nice wins versus things like Seaking, Rainy Castform, Tapu Fini, and Wigglytuff. Lord Quag is certainly more interesting than it was in May, particularly Shadow Quag which can do all of that PLUS also beat all versions of Jellicent, Hypno, and Togekiss, and Azumarill slides back into the win column too!
DRAGALGE
Dragon Tail Aqua Tail & Gunk Shot/Outrage
Good enough place as any to slide over to the relevant Poison types, since Dragalge masquerades as a Water type with Aqua Tail. But which way to go for the closer? Well, I'll start by saying that either one nets wins versus Araquanid (without Mirror Coat!), Tropius, and Jumpluff. After that, the slightly better record lies with Outrage that can beat Jellicent and Castform with high neutral damage, but I think I STILL lean towards Gunk Shot for its own unique win versus Azumarill and its high pressure versus enemy Fairies, Grasses, and others in the meta. In this case, I'd just keep it simple.
GARBODOR
Infestation Gunk Shot & Body Slam/Seed Bomb
With a face only a mother could love, here comes the only meta that can also tolerate Garbo. It's still not quite on the same tier as Dragalge and Swalot, but yes, Garbo is legit viable in Innocent Cup. Body Slam is my recommendation for spam alongside the required Gunk Shot, as Slam overwhelms stuff like Wobbuffet and Araquanid. But there is some potential spice here as well if you instead run with Seed Bomb, as you can then beat (Sludge Wave) Swampert and surprise the heck out of Ground and Water types in general.
ARBOK
Acid Dark Pulse & Acid Spray
And even a small step below Garbodor (there is a sentence is never thought I would write!), we have Arbok withAcid, and NOT the Dragon Tail you might expect instead. While it's true that Tail can beat other Dragons and/or Poisons (Dragalge, Zweilous, and Swalot specifically), it's very poor otherwise. Acid is a bad move, but it does manage to dissolve (see what I did there? I so funny hee hee haha) every non-Psychic Fairy and Grass type in the meta besides Tapu Fini, which is obviously a big deal in this meta.
HYPNO
Confusion Shadow Ball & Thunder Punch/Ice Punch
Usually an analysis on Hypno means a long debate between competing (and all viable) movesets. Now there ARE several that work outside of my recommendation of Shadow Ball/Thunder Punch, but I am ready to label that the odds on favorite. It just brings the most overall pressure in this meta, especially to the many Water and Flying types (beating Azumarill as one specific example), at the very small cost of being non-ideal versus Grasses... though Hypno doesn't beat Jumpluff or Tropius with Fire OR Ice anyway, so in my mind, no harm, no foul. At least, that's the way I'd go for non-Shadow. For Shadow Hypno, Ice Punch now comes with the power to freeze and shatter Jumpluff and Tropius, as well as Gliscor and Swampert, and still manages to knock out Azumarill too. Best of all worlds!
FARIGAMARIF
Confusion/Tackle Psychic Fangs & Thunderbolt
Bittersweet moment here, as it's my last time getting to talk about ol' Geeriffa— um, Giffimar— uh, Jeffomafig? Oh, fine... Girafarig. Yes, I HAVE known how to spell it all these years. 😅 My boy has only gotten better since recieving Psychic Fangs, to the point that it's viable in TWO configurations in this meta: [Tackle]() to overcome fellow Psychics (the type, NOT the move... two long-running jokes in one section! 💪) like Hypno, or Confusion which overpowers Whimsicott, Drifblim, Castform, and Clefable and is, honestly, just the better fast move in general. And don't forget Shadow Farigamiraf, which does give up Swampert, Jumpluff, Gliscor, and Charm Whimsie, but gains Surf/Shadow Ball Jellicent (already beats other Jelli variants), Seaking, Tapu Fini, Whiscash, and Togetic... and now beats Hypno without needing Tackle! One last toast to everyone's favorite funky Girafamathingy! It's been real, buddy. Glad you get to go out in style. 🦒
SLOWBRO/SLOWKING
Confusion/Water Gun Surfᴸ & Ice Beam/Psychic
Slowbro gets the slight nod because I like Confusion/Surf/Ice Beam the best personally (with standout wins versus Jumpluff, Tropius, and Florges), but if you want to instead run Water Gun/Surf/Psychic (the move!), then Slowking or Slowbro work equally well. The unique wins there are basically other Psychic types like DDeoxys and Wobbuffet. Either way, the Super Slow Bros are pretty nifty here! Similar BRUXISH not quite so much though.
CLAYDOL
Confusion Rock Tomb & Ice Beam/Shadow Ball
Not a strong recommendation, but Claydol does just enough here to be interesting (and that should make the Niantic employee that keeps adding moves to it every couple seasons very happy). With Ice Beam it beats Jumpluff, but beyond that you really want Shadow Ball, I think, which can instead beat Seaking and gives Claydol unique coverage versus Psychics, Flyers, AND Poisons, among others.
MEDICHAM
Counter Ice Punch & Psychic
Speaking of doing just enough to be interesting, this is one of those rare-ish metas where Medicham is merely okay. It does manage to hold down the Poisons as a good Psychic type should, but beyond that it doesn't really know what it wants to be in this meta, settling for picking off some big names but whiffing on plenty of others. I don't feel great about it myself, but be ready for it to show up in your opponent's six at some point, especially after it absolutely rocked the first Play Pokémon tournaments of the new GBL season.
HONCHKROW
Snarl Sky Attack & Brave Bird
One final chance to put in a good word for Honch (and end a 50k section with some spice... sniff 😢), one of the ultimate boom or bust options in PvP. Really not much to say than that... just reminding you that it and its Shadow version remain out there, lurking, daring you to take a shot with it. High risk, but potentially sky high reward in this final Silph month, folks!

75,000 Dust/75 Candy

TROPIUS
Razor Leaf Aerial Ace & Leaf Blade
I feel I am contractually obligated to start this section with ol' Banana Chin, specifically to point out a rare disagreement with my good friend Mr. PvPoke, who lists Air Slash as the fast move of choice. Respectfully, I disagree... it is Razor Leaf you want here. Not only does it still manage to beat everything Air Slash can that you most care about, and not only does it shred even scary Water types like Seaking and Jellicent, but it's also THE way for Trop to beat Florges and Electric types like Alolan Raichu and Dedenne. If you want more charge move pressure and such, go with Jumpluff. If you want to just beat stuff down almost regardless of remaining shields, Razor Leaf Tropius is your friend.
GLISCOR
Wing Attack Night Slash & Earthquake
Regular and Shadow both have plenty of merit. Non-Shadow has the bulk to outlast Clefable, Florges, Whimsicott, Zweilous, Medicham, Emolga, and Swampert, while Shadow instead has the raw power to overcome Jellicent, Tropius, Zapdos, Whiscash (before it can get to Blizzard), and non-Ice Punch Hypno.
GLIGAR
Wing Attack Night Slash & Returnᴾ
Honestly, though... purified Gligar is just better than Gliscor. Return is a big equalizing beatstick that allows Gligar to beat everything Gliscor can (regular and Shadow Gliscor combined, that is) except Jellicent, Whiscash, and Swalot, and further add on wins against Dragalge, Togekiss, and Gliscor itself! I think Gligar is a big time sleeper in Innocent Cup.
DRIFBLIM
Hex Icy Wind & Shadow Ball
It just got Mystical Fire, but at least in this meta, I think Blim wants to stick with Icy Wind, which does everything Fire can do plus can beat Flyers like Gliscor and Togetic. And just this once, I even give Shadow Blim a thumbs up. It drops Dedenne, but gains Tapu Fini, Rainy Castform, and stuff like Slurpuff too. Nice!
RAINY CASTFORM
Water Gun Weather Ball (Water) & Thunder
No Lanturn, no problem? Lanturn would indeed be perhaps a bit OP here, but Rainy is juuuuuuust right. Washes away Swalot and Garbo and even resists-all-its-moves Dragalge, Clefable and Togetic and Wigglytuff, and of course a ton of Waters (Jelli, Azu, Fini, Seaking) thanks to Thunder (and Swampert thanks to Weather Ball spam). Someone is definitely going to do well with it this month.
SYLVEON
Qucik Attack Psyshockᴸ & Moonblast
I mean, you CAN run Sylvie with Charm, but what makes it unique is Quick Attack. That plus Psyshock makes it the Fairy that handles the Poisons, while still doing most of the standard Fairy job (handling Dragons and Fighters and Bugs) and beating most of its fellow Fairies (and Jumpluff!) as well. It is very quietly a great Fairy in this meta.
ZWEILOUS
Dragon Breath Body Slam & Dark Pulse
Yes yes, it MUST avoid double super effective Fairy damage. And that leaves it with a less than inspiring record against the core meta. But take those away, and it has little to worry about beyond the few Bugs and Fighters in the meta. It beats the other Dragons you're going to see, and obviously dominates Psychic and Ghost types. And being a Dragon means resisting Water and Electric and Grass damage and beating many of those types too. It's far better (and sure to be far more popular) than the simple numbers would indicate.
DRAGONAIR
Dragon Breath Body Slam & Aqua Tail
Similar story here. The numbers are so-so, for similar reasons as Zweilous, but Dragonair puts out a lot of very spammy neutral damage. And unlike Zweilous, it can handle Seaking, Whiscash, DDeoxys and others.
I'll point out that Shadow DRAGONITE is pretty spicy too, though far less safe. It's more of a blunt object to the scalpel of Dragonair and Zweilous.

100,000 Dust/75 Candy

Running out of space (and already WAY out of time), so gonna blow through these briefly....

• ZAPDOS is the most interesting Legendary here, even with Emolga now really nipping at its heels. Emolga can overcome Whimsicott, Medicham, and Swalot, but it's still advantage Zapdos with wins versus Seaking, Jelli, Swampert, Gliscor, and Emolga itself. Zappie is still worth it, folks.
  
• It's no Azumarill, but yes, TAPU FINI still puts in some work. While Azu can outlast things like Emolga, Zapdos, Swampert, Gliscor, Florges, Wobb, and DDeoxys, it is Fini that alone can beat Jellicent, Dragalge, Araquanid, and Dedenne. There really IS a good case for both. If you're feeling particularly frisky, maybe literally both on the same team?
  
• Honorable mentions for GUZZLORD (which, unlike Zweilous, at least carries Sludge Bomb to somewhat threaten Fairies), LATIOS (just a Dragon that can wallop Poisons and other things with Luster Purge), DEFENSE DEOXYS (not particularly awesome here, but always a decent filler), and strangely-popular-so-far (according to Cup stats to date) CELEBI.
  

FEELIN' LUCKY?

For those unfamilar, this final section wraps up with stuff that needs to be pushed far into XL Candy territory. It CAN be great, but we're way past any semblance of "thrifty" at this point. Let's bring this one home!

• Staraptor isn't so hot here (partly because there's just not much for Close Combat to do), but STARAVIA has got the sauce, right up there with the surprising Swellow. The downside, of course, is having to max out Staravia just to get to 1468 CP. Worth it? Well that's YOUR call, my friend!
  
• So this one is cheating a bit, because RUFFLET is actually more than viable JUST beyond Level 40, if you max out a hundo at Level 40.5, hitting 1500 CP right on the nose. And it actually performs better in ways than the recommended heavy XL investment variety, having a better shot at beating Hypno and Swalot (while #1 IVs instead takes down only Dragalge and Togekiss instead). Wing Attack/Brave Bird** can't even be held down by the mediocre Aerial Ace. Rufflet is yet another strong bird candidate. If it didn't make sense why Noctowl and Pidgeot were banned yet, this should finally make that case.
  
• VULLABY kinda works too (and is one I KNOW folks have already invested in), obviously with distinct advantages versus Psychics and Ghosts in particular, and it beats plenty else besides. The big risk, of course, is a weakness to Fairy that other birds in this meta don't really have to worry about (at least not in terms of taking super effective damage). While the Flying Normals are more all-arounders, Vullaby is more of a specialist here.
  
• One of my favorite memories from early in my PvP analysis "career" was basically being bullied into writing an expansive analysis on LEDIAN by some Pokémon GO friends on Discord, and then being teased by many members of the early PvP community about it. This was in the days before XL Candy, so Ledian topped out at like 1350 CP then, making it a particuarly nutty venture. But hey, it CAN get to 1500 CP these days, though it's still mere spice and nowhere near meta. But if you took the plunge way back when... hey, this is the last month, right? YOLO!
  
• Mentioned a few times throughout this article, WOBBUFFET is honestly just alright, suffering from some of the same issues as DDeoxys... bulk and Counter alone don't get you so far in this particular meta. Not like they usually do! Wobb works, but this is not the time to build on from scratch, IMO. Smoke 'em if you already got 'em, sure.
  

And before I ramble on any further... that’s a wrap! Thanks for hanging with me to the end... of this article, of course, but also for the many of you that have followed and supported me for four and a half years now. I appreciate and love you all. 💙
Before I go, one final extension of my thanks to my PvP friends, local and around the world, who have lent their own ideas and suggestions over the years and helped teach me to be a better player and student of the game. There are too many to list them all, but a few specific shout-outs to PvPoke, GO Battle Log, PvPIVs.com, PokeMiners, my old friends at GO Stadium for mutally getting each other off the ground in the pre-GBL days, and of course, one final time, to the good folks at The Silph Arena and The Silph Road. Krydos, Drock, Zooeys, the old Meta Team, Steeeeeeeeeeve, Myugenlol, and Dronpes for really launching this multi-year adventure by reaching out to me in the first place, back in simpler times. And to those I ran out of time/brain capacity to mention... you know who you are. Thank you for being here along that journey and walking parts of that (Silph) road with me. And once more, my thanks to all of you, dear readers, for your own encouragement, support, and patience with me over the years.
Okay, I said I wouldn't get sappy again, and specifically that I would NOT use this song, but I think I kind of have to as a musical outro. So with apologies to Ol' Blue Eyes... well, I always HAVE done these reviews... my way.
🎼 And now, the end is near
♫ And so we face the final curtain.
♪ My friends, I'll say it clear:
♬ I stated my case, of which I'm certain!
♫ And more, much more than this
♩ I wrote it myyyyyyy way!
I hope you've enjoyed these analysis articles over the years as much as I've enjoyed preparing and sharing them with you!
All the best, my friends. I hope you have as many happy Silph Arena memories to hold on to as I do. To whatever comes next! Take care, Pokéfriends.
Don't cry because it's over. Smile, because it happened.
— Dr. Seuss

In my current playthrough I found some glitches, possibly known but thought I'd share anyway.

1. If you start the Epistrophy: North Oak quest, you don't actually have to return the car to the garage, as long as you stay within 150m of it, don't have too bad of a crash, and remain under 60 speed units then you can drive it as long as you like. If you park it on the flyover close to the Imagine quest, you'll still be within range to start the Imagine quest without the Epistrophy failing, however, the Epistrophy quest will fail when the braindance starts. This failure allows you to access the Map and Inventory pause menu during the Imagine braindance sequence, which will show that you've been teleported to an out of bounds location. Not sure if that's helpful to anyone.
2. In the Never Fade Away quest, you can run to the right hand side of the Porsche, and as long as you keep to the right hand side of the stairs and run across the bridge, you can visit anywhere on the map. Johnny has zero body so stealing a car isn't possible, but you can buy one, or take a motorbike (across the bridge,take a right and on the left hand side eventually there are some bikes). If you visit a Fast Travel terminal, it doesn't work, looking glitched, but then if you hit Pause (the save/load game menu) then the map works. You can't fast travel but you can set waypoints. A lot of verbal interactions are broken, the monks won't speak to you (Meetings along the edge immediately cancels), you can meet Yoda but when you get to Wakako's place, Takemura won't speak to you. You can skip time by sleeping in V's apartment which gives a very cursed third person animation, and interact with the mirrors to the same effect. The game won't let you save, but you can interact with a merchant on Jig-jig street or whatever, as soon as you quit out of the merchant shop screen the game saves, and then auto-saves will occur as normal. I haven't managed to get back to the Porsche to continue the game from this state yet, as the helicopter kills you pretty fast, so make sure you have a good quick or manual save before you get into the ice bath at the Voodoo Boyz place.

Neither of these have been particularly helpful or revealed anything as of yet but for game breakers it might be interesting or open up other avenues of exploration.

Race Information

• Name: Edinburgh Marathon
• Date: 28/05/2023
• Distance: 26.2 miles
• Location: Edinburgh, Scotland
• Website: https://www.edinburghmarathon.com
• Strava: https://www.strava.com/activities/9156321200
• Time: 2:54:41

Goals

Goal	Description	Completed?
A	Sub 3:10	Yes
B	Sub 3	Yes
B	London qualification 2024	hopefully

Splits

Kilometer	Time
1	4:11
2	4:07
3	3:56
4	4:10
5	3:54
6	4:00
7	4:01
8	4:03
9	4:11
10	4:06
11	4:08
12	4:05
13	4:03
14	4:09
15	4:04
16	4:07
17	4:08
18	4:06
19	4:09
20	4:02
21	4:04
22	4:03
23	4:07
24	4:13
25	4:04
26	4:07
27	4:07
28	4:02
29	4:07
30	4:08
31	4:08
32	4:07
33	4:05
34	4:07
35	4:10
36	4:13
37	4:13
38	4:13
39	4:16
40	4:17
41	4:21
42	4:18
43	3.45

Training

First marathon. Began running in lockdown, seen vast improvements in all my distances, managing to get 5k under 19 mins, 10k under 40 mins, and half marathon under 1:40. I joined a running club in Oct 2022 and seen further improvements in all distances, so I set myself a target of completing a half marathon in under 1:30 and a marathon in under 3.30.
My training consisted on speed work on a Monday (track) and Wednesday (usually in a park or quiet area with no traffic).These sessions are provided by the coaches at my running club. Some examples of the sessions are;
Monday: 5k paced session - 20 x 200m at 5Km Pace/100m Same Time Recovery e.g if 5Km pace is 40s for 200m then 100m recovery is covered in 40s
Wednesday: 10k paced session - 6 x 5 Mins @ 10Km Pace with 2.5 Mins Jog Recovery
Monday: 7 x 800m @ 5Km Pace with 100m in 90s Jog Recovery
Wednesday: 5min, 4min, 3min, 2min, 2min, 3min, 4min, 5min @ 10k pace with half jog rec.
Monday: 10 x 3 Mins/90s Jog Recovery (10k pace)
Wednesday: 8 x 4 Mins @ Half Marathon Pace with 3 Mins Reovery at Easy Run Pace (Not a jog)
Outwith these sessions, I tried to do at least 40km over another 4 runs at an easy pace, keeping heart late below 150bpm. Total monthly kilometres always over 200km. Since the new year I have been trying to hit at least 60km per week.
I booked this marathon last summer and had no idea of a plan or targets. I completed a half marathon in 1.19.59 the end of April this year, and this gave me belief that I would be able to post a good time in this race. I would have been disappointed if I did not manage to complete it in 3.10.
The longest run I completed during my training was an easy run of 33km, about 4 weeks before the race. I was confident I would be able to finish but had no idea how my body would do after that distance at a quicker pace.

Pre-race

I done my last long run (~22km) exactly one week before the race. Easy 10km runs Monday & Tuesday, Wednesday I done 3 x 10km at target marathon pace (4.14/km) with 2 mins rest in between. Another easy run on Thursday and then complete rest Friday & Saturday. On the Wednesday I started upping my carb intake significantly, eating a lot more bread, rice, pancakes, crumpets, scones, tortilla wraps, potatoes and chips. I was feeling rather bloated for these few days so cut back a bit on the Saturday in order to be good for Sunday.
Race day: Got up at 5.30am - big bowl of porridge with a scoop of protein powder, 2 slice of toast & strong coffee. Had a cereal bar and a banana at 8am (2 hours before start). Sipped water through the morning - not too much as was wary of toilet breaks during the race.

Race

Weather on the morning was ideal - good temperature, no wind or rain. Had the potential to heat up later on in the afternoon but overall great running conditions.
Race began at 10am. This was an extremely busy race and had some very narrow points over the first 10km where it was impossible to get by anyone.
The first quarter of the race through the city is all downhill. Great scenery all along closed roads, very enjoyable and a good way to start the race and get warmed up. The streets were packed with spectators and an overall good atmosphere.
KMs 10-30 are where you really need to focus on hitting target pace. The crowds thinned out a bit although there was still locals outside their houses cheering, handing out sweets, playing music, and even a though bands/ dance groups along the way. I always race without earphones in order to take all of this in and it is truly a worthwhile experience. Plenty of water stations along this stretch and the weather was still good. Ran with a few groups during this stretch and chatted away, was lucky enough to move in front of most of them onto the next group.
There is a short gravel section around 28kms around Gosford House. Afterwards I heard a lot of people moaning about this - it certainly is a bit different from running on the road. I suppose it depends on what you are used to, I do a fair bit of trail running as well so felt comfortable. Only thing I would say is the terrain is not suited for the Nike Alphafly.
The last section of the race was by far the most difficult. Temperature had heated up to around ~14 degrees (not roasting, but for us Scots who train all through winter it is on the warmer side). Along with a few gradual inclines on the way back made for some tough kilometres. The number of people I passed on the last stretch who were cramping, being sick or simply walking grew the further I got to the finish line. There also seemed to be less water stations on this section, which is not ideal when you are in the final stages of a marathon.
The final couple of hundred metres was a flat, straight run along mats to the finish line. By far the best part - all the hard work is complete, thousands of spectators and knowing your family and friends are at the finish line waiting to congratulate you. Even better knowing when you know you have smashed every target set!

Nutrition & Strategy

When I signed up for the race I put in a target time of 3.45 - meaning I started in a pen with runners a lot slower than me. This was not ideal as it was very busy and I was stuck behind big groups of runners a lot for the first 20-30mins. I definitely could have went quicker at the beginning, maybe a blessing in disguise as I was still under target pace and perhaps allowed me to not come out the traps too quickly. I took 2 salt tablets every water station, which was every 30 mins or so. Took 1 gel at 10km, 20km then 32km. Fortunately was able to get through the whole race without stopping for the toilet. I was really comfortable up until the last 10km, I had never ran more than this so had no idea how my body would react. I had plenty of time in the bank so I dialled it back a bit to make sure I could finish without cramping or pulling a muscle. My plan before the race was to keep every kilometre below 4.15 and hold on for as long as possible.

Post-race

I am going to take a few days off to let my body recover. I have a few 10k runs booked throughout the summer and hope to achieve some PBs. The time I posted should also qualify me for London next year.
Made with a new race report generator created by herumph.

I find this stuff pretty interesting so respond in the comments if you have better suggestions, or just wanna point something else.
My rules are that "Rick", "Mort" and "Morty" are the only puns that can be included for consistencies sake ("Jerry", "Beth", and "Smith" are sometimes included, but not always and not in the first two seasons, and other puns [eg Claw and Hoarder: Special Rictims Morty replaces "Law" with "Claw"] will also not be included for the same reason). Only one reference to media (made before the episode released) can be made.

Season 1

Original Title	Better Title	Explanation
Pilot	PiRick	Pun version of "Pilot". The network probably wouldn't allow this, but still.
Lawnmower Dog	Lawnmower Mort	The original title references the movie "Lawnmower Man", but my rules say that another pun/variation besides "Rick", "Mort", or "Morty" is not allowed.
Anatomy Park	MiRickle on Thirty-Mort Street	Same explanation as above. I can't do "JuRicksic Mort" because it will eventually be used in season six. So instead of focusing on the human body stuff, I've focused on the Christmas aspect, and chosen a classic movie. Also, just a note, Miracle on 34th Street is eventually referenced in dialogue in season six as well.
M. Night Shaym-Aliens	The Rixth Sense	Same explanation as above, once again, but this episode title uses "Aliens" as a pun as well as the name of an actor (M. Night Shyamalan). I instead did a pun on one of the actor's most famous movies, The Sixth Sense.
Meeseeks and Destroy!	Rick and Destroy	A better pun on the original reference, the song Seek and Destroy.
Rick Potion #9	Rick Potion No. 9	The pun (on the song Love Potion No. 9) still sucks, because there's nothing to work with, but at least the grammar is like the original song name now
Raising Gazorpazorp	VivaRickum	Pun on Vivariam, a movie about raising an alien
Rixty Minutes	Interdimensional Cable	First exception to my rules. This title will now align with Interdimensional Cable II: Tempting Fate properly
Something Ricked This Way Comes	Something Ricked This Way Comes	First one with no issues.
Close Rick-counters of the Rick Kind	Close Rick-counters of the Rick Kind	No problems again.
Ricksy Business	Ricksy Business	Yo we're on a streak!

Season 2

​

Original Title	Better Title	Explanation
A Rickle in Time	A Rickle in Time	We are on a rooooooooll!!!
Mortynight Run	Mortnight Rick	Better pun of Midnight Run. We were on a streak guys this is so sad can we get -293 upvotes
Auto Erotic Assimilation	Hive Mort	The original episode title had no pun and was based on auto-erotic asphyxiation (which was actually seen in Ricksy Business from Squanchy, just a weird coincidence), so I've based the new title on Hive Mind. I bet you can't guess what the movie's about.
Total Rickall	Total Rickall	There kinda getting the hang of it now!!!!
Get Schwifty	Mortsic and LyRicks	Based on the movie Music and Lyrics. If I wanted to go further the episode could have been called MortRick and LyRicks but that looks and sounds weird.
The Ricks Must be Crazy	Rick Gods Mort Be Crazy	Better pun of The Gods Must be Crazy
Big Trouble in Little Sanchez	The CuRickous Case of BenjaRick Button	Movie about a dude getting younger, like Rick in the episode. The name "Big Trouble in Little Sanchez" (title based on the movie "Big Trouble in Little China") is a pun because the name of the movie has been altered to reference the plot of the episode; but the plot of the actual movie is arbitrary. I have made it to be like the other episodes: so that the pun is on a movie which actually has plot similarity: in this case The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.
Interdimensional Cable 2: Tempting Fate	Interdimensional Cable 2: Tempting Fate	-
Look Who's Purging Now	The Purge: Anmorty	The title "Look Who's Purging Now" doesn't follow the format. Made it based on the movie The Purge: Anarchy. Was gonna do "Rick Purge: Amorty" but it would've been completely unrecognizable then.
The Wedding Squanchers	AmortRickan Wedding	Based on "American Wedding" (2003). First famous wedding movie that came up, which I could work with pun-wise.

Season 3

​

Original Title	Better Title	Explanation
The Rickshank Rickedemption	The Shawshank Rickdemption	Better pun of The Shawshank Redemption
Rickmancing the Stone	Rickmancing the Stone	Follows all the rules already!!
Pickle Rick	Couples Ricktreat	This movie is about therapy. I would've preferred some bottle-episode-like movie taking place entirely in a therapists office, but this is the best I could get (based on Couples Retreat, only partly about therapy). Getting a movie about the subplot was the only choice because the main plot was so farfetched and unique.
Vindicators 3: The Return of Worldender	Rickvengers: Age Mort UltRick	The pun (based on Avengers: Age of Ultron) is kind of a stretch, but basing it on The Avengers alone (making it The Rickvengers or Mort Rickvengers) would be too short.
The Whirly Dirly Conspiracy	Adventrick-land	Based on Adventureland, a movie about a run-down theme park. There wasn't much to go off of, because its such a unique plot, similarly to Pickle Rick. This might actually be why some titles don't attempt an episode pun.
Rest and Ricklaxation	-	I'm completely stumped. I couldn't find any movie, book, or TV show even remotely similar to any aspect of the plot.
The Ricklantis Mixup	Ricklantis The Lost Contirick	Based on Atlantis, The Lost Continent. I kept the Atlanatis mislead because it is a very important part of the episode and title.
Morty's Mind Blowers	Interdimensional Cable 3: Morty's Mind Blowers	To be consistent with the other two episodes.
The ABCs of Beth	I Mort-ied a Mort-ster from OutRick Space	Again, the original title is likely unique because the plot has never been done before. But I found something kind of similar to the side-plot, a really old movie called I Married a Monster from Outer Space
The Richchurian Mortydate	The Mortchurian Candirick	Much better pun on The Manchurian Candidate.

Season 4

​

Original Title	Better Title	Explanation
Edge of Tomorty: Rick Die Rickpeat	Edge of Tomorty	The original movie is Edge of Tomorrow, and the tagline is "Live Die, Repeat", but it is not needed in the title.
The Old Man and the Seat	-	Again, another name based on title pun as opposed to the actual plot of the source material. I can't find anything remotely related to any of the three plots, so help me out here.
One Crew over the Crewcoo's Morty	Ocean's Rickleven	Originally based on One Flew Over the Cucoo's Nest, also purely based on name pun and not plot contents.
Claw and Hoarder: Special Ricktim's Morty	Rickvanced Dungeons Mort Dragons	Original episode title was bad for a number of reasons. If you get the new reference, you get it, if you don't, you don't.
Rattlestar Ricklactica	Battlestar Ricklactica	"Rattle" can't be used in place of "Battle", per my rules for a good title.
Never Ricking Morty	The Nevericking Morty	Better pun of "The Neverending Story".
The Vat of Acid Episode	The Vat of Acid Episode	Perfect title already, the fact that there is no reference makes it better.
Childrick of Mort	Childrick of Mort	Perfect pun already (based on Children of Men)
Star Mort Rickturn of the Jerri	Star Mort: Rickturn of the Jedi	Don't know why the colon wasn't there already. "Jerri" isn't allowed because of my rules blah blah blah

Season 5

​

Original Title	Better Title	Explanation
Mort Dinner Rick Andre	Mort Dinner Rick Andre	-
Mortyplicity	Mortyplicity	-
A Rickconvenient Mort	A Rickconvenient Mort	A Rickconvenient Truth
Rickdependence Spray	Rickdependence Day	"Spray" can't be used as a pun... i'm starting to sound like a broken record
Amortycan Grickfitti	AmortRickan Grickfitti	A better pun of "American Grafitti"
Rick & Morty's Thanksploitation Spectacular	A Morty Brown Thanksricking	Based on "A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving". To my knowledge, this is a very famous Thanksgiving movie, but I wouldn't properly know; there might be a better one. Tell me in the replies if there is.
Gotron Jerrysis Rickvangelion	Morton Gene-rick Evangelion	Improved pun on "Neon Genesis Evangelion".
Rickternal Friendshine of the Spotless Mort	Rickternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mort	"Friendshine" can't be used because BLAH BLAH BLAH YOU ALREASDY KNOWEWFRGHTIUJ3Q
Forgetting Sarick Mortshall	Forgetting SaRick Mortshall	Good, but the pun isn't obvious, so the "r" should be capitalised as shown
Rickmurai Jack	SamuRick Jack	MUCH better pun based on "Samurai Jack". IT WAS RIGHT THERE GUYS.

Season 6

​

Original Title	Better Title	Explanation
Solaricks	Solaricks	THEY DID IT!!
Rick: A Mort Well Lived	Rick Free Mort Die Hard	Based on "Live Free or Die Hard", because the original title casually breaks all the god-dang rules
Bethic Twinstinct	BasRick Instinct	Better pun on "Basic Instinct". Tell me if the original movie is even related to the plot cause I have no idea and plot descriptions can be misleading.
Night Family	Night Gallerick	Better pun of "Night Gallery" AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA THIS PAIN IS ALMOST OVER REPEATING THE SMAE JRTHING OVEVR OVER OVER OVER O VOER OVEOR OVEOR OVEOR OVOEVOR OOVEOROVOE OVOER
Final DeSmithation	Final DestRickation	ALMOST THERE
JuRicksic Mort	JuRicksic Mort	no complaints also ALMOST THEEEEEERE
Analyze This	-	Again, this plot is so unique there's no movie I can reference. Comment if you know one. also ALMOST THERE SO CLOSE SO CLOSE SO CLOSE
A Rick in King Morur's Mort	A Rick in King Arthur's Mort	better pun on "A Kid in King Arthur's Court'" ONE MORE ONE MORE SO CLOSE SO CLOSE
Ricktional Mortpoon's Rickmas Mortcation	Natrickal Lampoon's Rickmas Vacation	YEEEEYEYYEYEYEYEYEYEYEYEYS PAIN ENDED YES LETS GOOOOOOOOOOO

So yeah I just find this pretty interesting. Comment if you have any suggestions or disagree or agree or anything.

After remaining invincible and impregnable for centuries, the mighty Pir Panchal is witnessing enormous developmental activity for a new expressway, a challenging railway line and most of the dam-fed hydropower projects involving an investment of tens of thousands of crores. At places, this is triggering the fragile range to cave in at the cost of homes and livelihoods of age-old villages, a situation that experts believe could have been avoided with better pre-feasibility studies and sophisticated project implementation, reports Masood Hussain
Anticipated for years, finally, the increased incidence of land subsidence and sinking in the Pir Panchal Mountains is Jammu and Kashmir’s new normal. The young fragile and unstable mountain range separating Kashmir from the rest of the world is in news frequently as the slopes housing small habitations for centuries are caving in.
On February 19, 2023, around 16 structures of Duksar Dalwa (Duksar Dal), a hamlet almost 45 km uphill from Ramban, suffered serious damage as the land caved in. It crippled road connectivity between Gool and Ramban where almost 500 meters developed cracks, tripped the electric supply and snapped the water supply. Three homes developed cracks forcing authorities to shift the impacted population to safer areas.
Officials said while they are working overtime to resume power and water supplies, they are also improving the Dharam-Salballa road to make it an alternative supply route to the “literally disconnected” area. In the sinking village, the official encouraged the residents to move swiftly to safer spots. For residents, however, the gradual 3-day sinking was a painful watch of their life earnings slowly cracking up and becoming black holes over hills.
It started with a crater that widened to almost 500 meters during two nights, making almost everything around unsafe, unstable and life-threatening. A mosque, Darsgah, the village seminary and the village graveyard were destroyed. Residents quickly exhumed a recently buried body and laid it to rest at a “safe” place.
Officials who visited the spot said the village’s agriculture fields were rendered useless, pushing residents into poverty. They lost homes and their livelihoods too.
The Duksar erasing came less than a fortnight after Doda lost a cluster of houses to a similar instance on February 3, 2023. Located on the foothills on the road to Kishtwar near Thathri, nearly 35 km from Doda, the volunteers, residents and government officials had to quickly shift 117 members of 19 families as the patch of slope housing the Nai Basti cluster gave in within three days. A total of 21 structures cracked and became unsafe.
Horrific Tunnel Collapse
The last horrific tragedy took place on May 19, 2022, when the workers were digging into an adit (minor access to the T3 tunnel) near Khooni Nalla at Ramsu’s Makerkot area. It collapsed over them killing ten workers including two local residents and eight Nepalese labourers. The tragedy struck during the day amid incessant rain but still, only two persons could be rescued alive.
The workers were on the challenging stretch of the national highway between Digdole and Khooni Nallah, which is otherwise notorious for frequent landslides and shooting stones due to fragile geology. It was part of the twin-tube tunnel that would connect Digdole to Panthyal and was implemented by Ceigall India Limited in a JV with Patel Engineering Limited. (The contractor has been imposed a heavy fine.)
The National Highway Authority of India (NHAI) that has taken over the Jammu Srinagar national highway from Border Roads Organisation (BRO), a few years back, is constructing at least five tunnels to bypass the highway’s 3-km “killer’’ stretch from Panthyal to Makerkote. Tunnel T3 is part of this intervention.
Unlike the rest of the highway, the 36-km Banihal Ramban stretch has been the most challenging one and that is why it is still under implementation. On this stretch are six “killer spots” located on a 14-km road stretch and NHAI intends to spend Rs 2000 crore to manage this. Implementation of this would offer some safety from frequent halts owing to shooting stones at Marog, Panthial, Digdol and Battery Chashma.
Triggering Instability
Implementation of these projects is triggering crises for the localities living around them. As many as 13 houses in Sujmatana village near Ramsu were literally devastated. The round-the-clock blasting for the tunnel projects and cutting work made these houses inhospitable after they developed cracks. Most of them have left their unsafe homes and migrated elsewhere. Though officials are looking into the crisis since 2017, it is yet to be settled.
On August 4, 2022, 36 families had a providential escape when their Bassan village in Reasi became the casualty of sinking and erosion at the same time. Without any notice, landslides carried down boulders and muck that crashed the houses and put the agriculture fields out of sight. It was so abrupt, villages said, that they had no time to take their belongings along.
Officials admitted that almost 60 kanals of land sank as another 400 kanals patch was rendered useless. Almost all the fruit trees, mostly walnut and apricot, were engulfed in mud. Almost 200 meters of a PMGSY road was also downthrown by around 25 meters from its actual alignment.
The earlier worst case was reported from Dalwas when on March 28, 2020, the residents fled when their homes and fields were literally buried by landslides. Almost 40 households were impacted.
The village has been there for ages and never experienced any such threat. Then one day it literally disappeared. Residents alleged that being away from Srinagar and Jammu, deep into the mountains they hardly were reported. At one point in time when they wanted to protest, authorities invoked Covid19 concerns to prevent it.
Response Protocol
Over the years, the government response has remained unchanged. Once the reports land that spots are sinking, they as the first quick reaction, send cops, paramilitary, SDRF and revenue officials to oversee and, in most cases, extend help in quick evacuations. In stage two, the respective Deputy Commissioner writes to geologists and the Department of Geology and Mining and, off late, to the Geological Survey of India, who rush their experts to these spots. In the subsequent few days, they study the local rock formations and submit reports, part of which goes to newspapers and by and large the files get closed.
At the same time, files start rolling about relief and rehabilitation. It takes its own time. In many cases, people who lose their homes and livelihoods are yet to be properly rehabilitated.
Invariably, the policymakers and the administrators avoid two vital ingredients of the story – the assessments that the local populations make about the crisis they land in and the wider angle that remains unchanged across the Pir Panchal range.
Resident Assessments
Affected populations are unwilling to accept that these crises are natural. They see them as man-made disasters. Raqeeb Wani, a former Sarpanch of Daskar Dalwa told The Telegraph that his village’s erasing is directly linked to the construction of two railway tunnels downhill, that would link a 3km rail track between Sangaldan and Chaddi. He attributed it to the “continuous blasting” that loosens the soil and adds to the instability of the mountain.
“A few years ago, we had a similar disaster in Sangaldan a few years ago when an entire market caved in,” Wani was quoted as saying. “That also was owing to the railway project.”
In the case of Dalwas, for instance, a former lawmaker from Ramban Ashok Kumar Dogra said the “unscientific planning” of the widening of the national highway is responsible. “The highway authorities started excavation of the road from beneath the village without raising any wall on the side of the village. As no concrete measures were taken by the NHAI to protect the village and debris was also disposed of at the same place, the tragedy was bound to happen and the houses collapsed and the village sank,” Dogra told Outlook. “I will not call it a natural disaster. It was the unplanned construction that destabilised the soil of the whole area, leading to its sinking.”
Right to A Road
Pir Panchal mountain range has remained literally invincible and technically impregnable for centuries. It took decades of thought process and a lot of resources to lay a foot track between Jammu and Srinagar, to have an alternative to Mughal Road. Known to history as the Banihal Cart Road, it was difficult and always retained by Dogra despots as a private route. It remained inaccessible to people till 1922. Till the Jawahar Tunnel was inaugurated, the road would pass over the Banihal pass, the abandoned remnants of which still exist.
This made Kashmir rely on the Jhelum Valley Road (JVR) as the main highway.
Almost 225 residents from 48 households who somehow survived the tragedy moved to another village and are still struggling to pick the threads of their lives. Though life has returned to the village, they are still fighting for an electric supply line and the rebuilding of the school building.
An Upcoming Railway
The road is just not the only thing that is happening deep inside the Pir Panchal mountain range. While the road is being upgraded, there is a railway project in an advanced stage of implementation.
Unlike the road that is being laid over the foothills not far away from the old alignment that also followed a foot track of the eighteenth and nineteenth century, the railway track is passing through a virgin area, part of which has not seen even a bus. For making rail reach Baramulla from Udhampur, the 272-km project is going to cost a whopping Rs 37012 crore of which more than ninety per cent has already been spent.
Work on JVR started in 1880 and was formally thrown open in September 1890, when Maharaja Partap Singh was driven through from Baramulla to Kohala. The construction of this gigantic road project was implemented by a major British Indian contractor M/S Spedding, Mitchell & Co and was overseen by different British engineers at different stretches. While General de Bourbel oversaw everything as the Chief Engineer Kashmir, it was Alexander Atkinsonmanagedmost of the road up to Chakoti (on the other side of LoC now) and a few parts on the Kashmir side; Farrant was in charge of construction between Chakotiand Baramulla; as EG Hebbert supervised its completion in November 1889. Resources apart, it cost too many lives. Between Chakoti and Baramulla, 54 Pathans were killed in four years. Besides, 20 lives were lost to snake bites.
Post-partition, the Banihal Road became arterial and pressure built with a surge in population and demand in Kashmir. For seven decades, this road bore the brunt of all the pressures of travel, demand and consumerism and gave in. The rise of the Kashmir apple added another pressure factor so did the security requirements.
Finally, a stage reached that the health of the national highway was directly linked to the economic well-being of Kashmir. This paved the way for the decision by the Government of India that distances need to be reduced and the highway must be improved so that commuters do not end up spending a day on a 300-km highway.
More than a decade after the first spadework, it is emerging as one of the best roads. There are three major tunnels that have skipped dangerous patches while reducing distance and uphill driving: a set of four small tunnels near Nandni with a combined length of 1.4 km; 9.2 km Chenani-Nashri tunnel has bypassed a gruelling uphill drive and 8.5 km Banihal-Qazigund tunnel is going to tame dangerous Banihal Pass forever.
Distance has dropped from 300 to 270 km and the travel time from 12 to around 5 hours. But the Banihal-Ramban stretch remains a challenge. Earlier, it was merely a technological crisis, now it is a serious ecological issue.
These villagers were fortunate in comparison to the Sadal hamlet of Udhampur which was buried under a massive mudslide at noon on September 6, 2014. Following incessant rains for many days, it triggered massive floods in Kashmir and the rest of the erstwhile state. As many as 41 residents from 65 households were killed by the wee hour mountain collapse that brought an almost 30-foot-thick blanket of rafted rock fragments mud, sludge and rubble.
The rail is already chugging between Udhampur and Katra (25 km) since July 2014, Baramulla to Qazigund (118 km) since October 2009; and Qazigund to Baramulla (18 km) since June 2013. This leaves the most challenging stretch of 111 km between Banihal and Katra to be implemented.
However, the cost of the track does not define the project. It is the work that details the challenge. Nearly 119 km of the entire track will pass through 38 tunnels, the longest of which is 12.77 km long.
What is interesting is that in the 111-km Banihal – Katra track, 97.42 km are tunnels and most of the rest are bridges. Railway officials have to do 163.82 km of tunnelling in total – 66.4 km are escape tunnels – to make the track possible. For making these tunnel spots accessible to men and machines, there is a network of 205 km of roads, which remain busy round the clock.
This track will have 37 bridges – totalling 7 km in length, including the iconic Chenab Bridge, which is tipped to be the highest railway bridge on earth. While this bridge is ready, the current focus is on the first cable-stayed railway bridge on Anji Khad.
With thousands of people working deep inside the mountains with basic cutting and blasting machinery a lot of activity is generated.
There were dozens of instances in which the portions of various tunnels collapsed resulting in either changing the alignment or repairing the damage and restoring the tunnel. In July 2006, an almost 3 km long tunnel on the Udhampur-Katra track gradually started sinking after massive soil swelling on the two ends making it unusable and thus delaying the project. Northern Railways later hired an Austrian consultant, Geo Consult International (GCI), to salvage the project after many years of delay. The causes of the damage were visible to even the then Chief Minister, Ghulam Nabi Azad, who said he saw “a river flowing under the tunnel”.
A number of tunnels between Katra and Sangaldan witnessed “abnormal” water discharge making construction a challenging task. In Sangladan, the managers were shocked when they saw a 500-meter track between two tunnels actually missing one fine morning. Reported in 2006, it destroyed a vast stretch of land on a slope housing as many as 100 structures besides over 400 meters of the road connecting Mahore and Gulabgarh.
In 2016 summer of 2016, authorities shifted 124 families – almost the entire village of Dharam, after the vast patch of land that housed the hamlet caved in within three months. Though the officials attributed it to natural reasons, the residents linked the unprecedented situation to the ongoing work on the railway line passing close to the village.
Oceans In Gorges
Piercing the Pir Panchal mountains for smooth, faster and better communication is just not the only thing happening in the region. Owing to the mighty Chenab, the region is Jammu and Kashmir’s powerhouse. More than 90 per cent of the hydropower potential is restricted to the region owing to the availability of water and enough space to construct dams within the mountain gorges. This has led to a situation where the region holds a massive amount of water in its dams.
The region’s tryst with power generation started late last century with the implementation of the 900-MW Salal power project in Reasi in 1978. The project’s 1.45 million cubic meter dam has created the Salal lake which has the capacity to retain more than 28 million cubic meters of water.
Then came the 390-MW Dul-Hasti Power Project near Kishtwar. It was followed by the 900-MW Baglihar power with 1.8 cubic meters of the dam and an additional reservoir capacity of 39.5 cubic meters – a facility that has created a huge water body in the mountain gorges between Chanderkote belt and Thathri to the extent that certain localities and infrastructures had to be relocated. Quite a few people still live in the highway town of Pul Doda.
The region has many other power projects at different stages of implementation. These include 850-MW Rattle, 100-MW Pakal Dul, 624-MW Kiru, 540-MW Kwar, 800-MW Bursar, and 930-MW Kirthai-II. This is an investment of tens of thousands of crore in mountain gorges on a single river within a river length of fewer than 100 km.
Baglihar is the only project that Jammu and Kashmir’s fully-owned JKSPDC owns. Chenab Valley Power Projects Ltd, a joint venture between JKSPDC and NHPC, India’s hydropower giant, is implementing four power projects – Pakal Dul, Kiru, Kwar and Karthia-II. Salal and Dul Hasti owned fully by NHPC and Ratle is being executed under a fresh JV with JKSPDC in which the latter holds 49 per cent stakes.
Stakes apart, hydropower stations are gigantic projects. These need huge spaces for water storage – even in the case of run-of-the-river schemes, and a lot of tunnelling. All projects have main tunnels, both head race and tail race, and then there are a lot of additional adits and small tunnels for servicing. Even though most of the tunnels and the dams are concrete structures, having such critical infrastructure usually triggers soil erosion and soil swellings too often. The 110-km Batote Kishtwar road has been ailing for all these years. Never in a year could it operate for all 365 days.
Cause versus Consequence?
Science has fundamentally opposed the idea of correlating causes with consequences especially when there is no plausible explanation. In the case of the Pir Panchal region, however, there are striking correlations. For most of recent history, land sliding has been happening around the national highway only. However, in the last decade, land subsidence is a routine and it is happening at all places where developmental activities are going on.
Bhaderwah town and its surroundings are witnessing “region-exclusive” tremors almost every year. In August 2022, there were 21 tremors, reaching up to 3.9 on the Richter scale. Such summer tremors have been there in 2013, 2016, 2017, and 2018. In fact, 2013 was harrowing as the earthquakes touched 5.8 on the Richter scale.
Land patches are caving in at spots closer to some kind of major developmental activity. This is as true with railway projects as it is in road widening projects. Certain spots caved in because works were implemented without a detailed study.
In Sangaldan, for instance, when the railway track collapsed, it was pointed out by geologist Prof GM Bhat that it had been built “on a fossil slide”, which failed to withstand the weight and crumbled down. “We knew it for decades but we were never consulted,” Bhat said. “In this part of the Himalayas, rock types change after every half a kilometre.”
A respected geologist, Bhat insists that developmental activities can take place in any space that is as fragile as Pir Panchal but it needs adequate pre-implementation study and proper implementation mechanism.
“In the four-laning of the highway, the crisis would have been manageable had there been least vertical cuts,” Bhat said. “Impounding so much of water (in power projects dams) within a small patch has the potential of inducing earthquakes.” He insists that the managers of the water projects must ensure better maintenance of the tunnels or these could become a serious crisis in future.
Bhat, however, sees society also going unruly. “In Banihal near the Mahu Mangat side, a hillock is a completely populated town now,” he said. “Has anybody tried to verify where the waste goes? Are we expecting a major crisis in the coming days when the hill will cave in because of seepage?”
The region is a risky belt given its fragile geology. The upcoming railway line is built over three major active geological fault lines: the Main Boundary Thrust (between Udhampur and Katra), the Muree Thrust (between Baglihar and Sangaldan) and the Panjal Thrust (between Digdol and Mahu Mangat). “I never say railway tracks cannot cross fault lines but I believe that had local expertise been involved, extensive fieldwork would have reduced the costs and perfected the alignment”. Entire Jammu and Kashmir is classified as seismic zone-V, the highest earthquake-prone area. CAG has already done a thick report on the resources that were wasted because of the geological surprises that erupted after various rail projects were implemented. Parts of the alignment were changed and completed works were abandoned.
A fault line actually passes through the centre of the Baghlihar dam and most other reservoirs are very close to the fault lines underneath. “A dam burst will be worse than the earthquake itself,” Bhat, who retired recently after heading the University of Jammu’s Geology Department for a long time, said. Interestingly, the area is reporting an increased incidence of cloudbursts, seen as an indicator of climate change. “One major cloudburst near a dam can trigger unprecedented devastation.”
One such cloudburst on July 28, 2021, almost decimated Honzer, a hamlet concealed within inaccessible mountains of remote Dacchan, killing 26 residents. The bodies of almost 18 of the victims were never found.
Many geologists who studied Dalwa fall attributed the land subsidence to water seepage, and extensive cutting of steep slopes. They have suggested a robust urban land use plan, a prerequisite for any activity, especially in hilly areas.
https://kashmirlife.net/o-pir-panchal-vol-14-issue-49-311779/

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Chapter One
Chapter Seventeen
Martinez slouched his way into the kitchen. He wasn’t really paying attention to his surroundings; in his defense it was early in the morning and he’d failed at getting some appropriate shut-eye before he went and, you know, bared his entire soul to Chao. At least that was his plan. But as usual, the universe laughs at plans.
He placed a sealed plastic package into the coffee machine, then put a styrofoam cup in the appropriate location. He yawned as the machine began its burbling.
“Hey.”
Martinez snapped his head over at McCoy, who’d suddenly appeared out of nowhere. She leaned against the counter, with a big and very evil grin on her face.
“Um…” began Martinez, before he was interrupted by a voice from his other side.
“Hey.” Matt leaned there, and if McCoy looked evil then Matt looked positively diabolical. Martinez glanced behind him and saw more soldiers, all with looks of ill intent on their faces.
The corporal didn’t waste time in asking what the hell they were up to, he just started throwing hands and feet. Future scholars would count the resulting battle as one for the ages; Martinez even managed to tag Toke with a couple of pretty good punches and one really sweet roundhouse kick.
But in the end, it was still a case of one against many.
__________
“Mmmm mm mmm m mmm!” protested Martinez.
Chao sighed as she beheld his bruised and very taped-up state. “What did those idiots do to you?”
“Mm MMM mmm mm!” The corporal’s mouth was now duct-taped shut, so verbal acuity was not amongst his strong suits at the present.
She put her hands on her hips. “For crying out loud. Matt goes and gets me all worried that you’re somehow in trouble, he leads me over to some random closet and shoves me in here and I find you like this. What’s the game?”
“Gmmmm?”
Chao squatted, examining his bonds. “Well, they sure got you trussed up like a roast for the feast. Hey, if you want me to pull the tape off of your mouth just nod.”
After a moment, Martinez nodded. She reached for the tape covering his mouth, then hesitated. “Um. I don’t have much experience with this so I’ll leave it up to you. Is it better to go fast or slow? Blink once for fast, two for slow.”
With deliberation, Martinez blinked once. Chao nodded and yanked the tape off. They’d even left a convenient tab for her to grab ahold of.
“FUCKING OW!” yelled the corporal. “Um, sorry.”
Chao seated herself before his figure, which was tied up in a fetal position. “You know, the last few weeks have given me a bit of a crash-course on the types of grab-ass shenanigans you soldier types get up to. This is a new one, though. Care to educate me?”
Martinez stared at her in horrified disbelief. “Toke didn’t tell you?”
“Tell me what? He just said you were in trouble and that I needed to help out.”
“That…that evil, evil son of a bitch. He said he’d explain everything!”
“Explain what? Luca, I am just about ready to walk out and leave you in here to eventually soil yourself.”
Now that he was literally hog-tied and unable to escape, Martinez realized he had to ‘fess up. “I like you,” he said in an almost-gasp. “I mean, I like you like you. In that way. I mean, I know it’s sudden. We’ve only known each other for maybe four weeks but you’re so smart and pretty and…and, you know about Asimov and Heinlein and Clarke and about orbital mechanics and star spectra.”
She sat in stunned silence while he continued. “I don’t bring much to the table, I get that. But I want to learn. After we come back from the Rithro’s repair mission, I want to go to college…I’ve started looking into that. I’m not much of a catch right now, but maybe one day you’d consider liking me that way as well…”
He was interrupted as she leaned down, grabbed his head, and planted a firm kiss upon his lips. After a moment of pure bliss for both of them, she pulled away. “You utter and complete idiot,” she said, but she said it with a smile. “Did you never think that perhaps you have some attractive qualities of your own?”
Martinez tried to shrug as best he could, being all tied up. “I mean, Toke did mention that I have some pretty nice abs?”
Chao’s eyes glinted in good humor. “Pretty nice? You’ve got an eight-pack. I could shred cheese on those bad boys.”
He looked up at her. “Wait. When did you see my abs?”
“Back when we were sequestered within Cheyenne Mountain, and we were strictly on sponge baths.” She patted his taut stomach, feeling up those aforementioned abs. “Anyways, do you want me to get you out of these bonds?”
“Um…”
Her good humor turned into a diabolical grin. “Or, would you like to remain in these bonds? Toke said something about a safe-word and safe-gesture, he said you’d explain it.”
“Of course he did. That fucker. Um. Chao, this has gone better than I could ever have imagined but I don’t think you need to know…”
“Know about what?” Her caressing of his unprotected stomach did not cease. “Does my corporal have a bit of a fetish?”
His brain seized up again at her emphasis on ‘my’. “I…”
“Let me put it this way. Would you like me to be all mean and nasty, or more cuddly and dommy mommy?”
After a long, long moment of silence he finally murmured, “Dommy mommy.”
“See? That wasn’t so hard. Well, admitting it wasn’t hard.” Her hand continued its explorations. “Now this here is indeed quite hard. Hmm. Good thing you are just too cute for words.”
“Cute?” He looked in disbelief at her, and then flinched at her continued caressing.
“One can be a badass and also cute, my dear corporal. You tick both boxes. Not to mention you’re into a fetish which I’ve wanted to indulge in for a while. Never found anyone who was into it, until now.”
Outside the closet, McCoy stood guard. She smiled in triumph as she heard Martinez yell out in pleasure, and turned to give Toke a thumbs-up.
“It’s about fuckin’ time,” she said.
Matt smiled back at her. He now sported an epic shiner under one eye. “Eh, some kids just need a bit of a nudge, you know?”
__________
It was…it was a wall. A wall he was looking at.
A wall covered in white stucco. Nothing too fancy, but it was indeed a wall and Joachim realized he was looking at it. That might seem like a substandard feat, but for a man who’d been in Joachim’s proverbial shoes it was a grand accomplishment.
His mouth worked as he swished his tongue around in his mouth. He looked around. He sat in a lawn chair in the middle of a beige room, lined on every wall with the stucco he’d just realized he was looking at. “H…hello?”
His voice felt old and clotted. Joachim looked down at his hand, and he saw wrinkled skin and age spots that he didn’t remember seeing there before.
This room only had one exit door, and now it opened. A lean man with dark skin entered. “Joachim Neimyer? I’m Zawahir Ibn Harith. How are you feeling, sir?”
Joachim fixed the newcomer with a steady eye. “I’ll be feeling better once I know where I am. And where is Corina?”
“Corina is on her way, she should be here within minutes. We had great hopes that your treatment was progressing well. Do you know what day it is, sir?”
“Of course I know what day it is! It’s…” Joachim trailed off as he realized that he didn’t know. The last few…years? Decades? He had glimpses of moments in time, as if viewed via a strobe-light. He now realized it was much, much later in time than he thought. “I…what happened?”
“Alzheimer’s, Mr. Neimeyer.” Zawahir’s eyes were kind. “You’ve been suffering from it for the last seven years. But we discovered…or, I should say, we adopted a methodology for treating it. It not only stops the damage, it has a way of reversing at least some of its effects. I fear you will never regain the memories from the time during which you suffered the most, but from now on your mind should function properly once more.”
Joachim rubbed his now-bald pate. “Is Corina all right?”
Zawahir pulled over a chair next to him and seated himself. “She is, blessedly, un-marked by the same affliction. We are, of course, putting her on a similar treatment as yourself just to make sure she remains so. With her consent, of course.”
The old man fixed Zawahir with a direct stare. “This whole thing smells experimental. Why choose me?”
“Mmm, you are as sharp as ever, sir. This is indeed an experiment, and we chose you because you are one of the preeminent rocket experts who ever lived. We need such skills now.”
“What?”
Zawahir leaned forward. “I will do my best to catch you up…”
__________
She walked through the door, supported by a cane. The one person, the beacon in Joachim’s life. Corina lit up upon seeing his gaze. A gaze with intent, with purpose. “They said you were feeling better!”
Before he or the surrounding interns could react, Joachim now found himself with a hundred-ish pounds of enthusiastic elderly woman in his lap.
“Tell me something only you know,” she whispered.
Joachim smiled. “Do you remember what I told you when we saw the green flash? That one time, in Hawaii? During our honeymoon?”
“I do. You said that the flash was the souls of those who’ve gone before.”
“And I promised you that, if I passed before you, that you would just need to look for the flash to see me.”
She clasped his wrinkled face in her own equally-lined hands. “You did better than that. You came back to me.”
“I guess I did.” He kissed her, reveling in the fact that this time he’d remember it.
Zawahir motioned to everyone else in the room. They all quickly got the hint and left the pair to their mutual happiness.
__________
The door of the simulator cracked open and Kifa came scuttling out. She peered up at the normally stony face of Master Sergeant Wilkes; right now the latter looked like he’d just been kicked in the chest by a donkey and was still trying to process it. “How did I do?” asked the xyrax. “It seems like I did quite well.”
“Um…Kifa. Well. Um. Did the controls seem to operate right?”
“Oh, yes! Very much, quite intuitive! It’s been ages since I simulated combat within an atmosphere! That was fun!”
“Fun. You do realize that you were going up against aces. I mean real, human aces?”
“Oh. I thought that was the case.” Kifa peered back into the simulator. “Was I not supposed to know that?”
Wilkes finally laughed, something that was fortunately captured by several cameras and used as blackmail material for many years after. “You did fine. You also just utterly smoked several of the finest pilots on Earth, and that includes non-Americans.” He regarded her with a steady gaze. “I wish I could recruit you to TOPGUN, I’d love to see you show those strutting peacocks a thing or two.”
“What is TOPGUN?”
He sighed. “Right now, it’s in the same exact department as buggy-whip manufacturing. You just showed these punks that, even in atmosphere, you’re death from above.”
Kifa seemed to shrink into themselves. “I didn’t mean to…”
“Now, now, Kifa, this is a good thing. Gotta keep those aforementioned strutting peacocks on their toes. But soon we’ll be dealing with fighting using orbital mechanics, something with which our air-combat people have about as much actual experience as they do with chatting up the fairer sex.”
“Which fairer sex? I mean, my kind is hermaphroditic so I know the mechanics but…” Kifa trailed off as it blinked its four big, oil-drop eyes.
“You are too damned cute for your own good. Pick a sex, any one, I for one do not give a fuck anymore. Point being, we humans need a crash-course in how to fight in space. No atmo, so trying to maneuver using flaps and wings and things is right out. We need to understand how orbits work. Not just intellectually, but in our bones.” Wilkes patted the simulator. “We need you to teach us. We need you to teach an army. Well, navy. Technically. I guess it would count as a navy. Either way. You know how to do this shit, and you just proved that even in atmosphere you can run rings around our best and brightest. So. Are you willing to show us your voodoo?”
“My voodoo…” The blue-furred spider suddenly rose on all of its legs. “Of course! This will be used against the Breakers, yes?”
“Of course.”
“Then it will be my greatest pleasure to show you all of my voodoo!” Kifa paused. “Although, if I received a headpat or two it would also help me properly consider how best to teach you.”
Sergeant Wilkes sighed and reached down. Kifa purred in delight as the usually-taciturn sergeant unleashed the full might and power of Human Headpats upon the alien pilot.
__________
Sadaf watched as the two dark-haired women and one blonde-haired woman had a black-and-white cap fitted over their heads. Both had received a haircut for this day; Parvati for one seemed to be less than thrilled about losing some of her tresses.
“This is the snoopy-cap,” said the aide who stood between the two women. The surroundings were sterile and very, very white. “This cap contains your communications, and it will keep your hair in place during launch.” This was the actual process getting shown to the world. Behind them, Ravindar and Martinez were also in the process of getting suited up, but this was done with much less fanfare. The aide’s words carried to them all, of course.
“Arms up!” Everyone going into space today raised their arms, and a large tubby-looking upper suit then slid down over five figures. Many human hands made sure that their heads made it through the upper ring. “This is the upper part of your pressure suit,” said the aide. “The gloves and helmet will complete that part, but that will come later. Now I will need you all to step into your pants…”
Everyone did so; Chao was the one who didn’t quite make it look elegant. She grinned at Martinez as she fumbled for a bit getting her pressure-suit trousers on; his resulting blush was caught for the cameras but it wasn’t until a week later that someone realized what it meant.
“Latch!” The aide’s voice was hard as metal.
Many hands reached out, twisting multiple metal rings to lock the upper and lower halves of the four pressure suits into one cohesive piece.
“I still say we could make them some proper hardsuits,” said Sadaf to Takh. The two stood off to the side, not exactly part of the dance but not apart from it either.
“No, I think this is better,” said Takh. “We need to make this look more like a…human effort.” Her XO stood at parade-rest, with both sets of arms clasped behind his back.
Sadaf nodded. “I will default to your judgement. By the way…how are you and Corporal McCoy getting along?” She nodded towards the last-minute addition to the crew.
“Um…Ma’am, I…” His faltering was not helped by watching the humans in the clean-room getting clear helmets fixed over their heads. Each latching was followed-up by a tap on the shoulder and a thumbs-up.
The big human, Ravindar, waved his arms over his shoulders as he got the feel for the suit. He’d managed to get the helmet on without an issue, in spite of his substantial beard. “Need more air?” asked a much smaller woman at his side. He shook his head, while he continued to flex and get comfortable with how the suit restricted his motions.
Getting the Sikh to this moment had been a master-class in diplomacy. Not least of which was because he still carried a weapon upon his person. Sadaf had no experience with ‘Sikhism’, but she could appreciate any culture or creed which dictated the need to carry a protective weapon at all times. It appealed to her nature.
“Do you think Parvati knows that he’s, well, into her?” asked Takh.
His captain’s voice became damn near sultry. “Now Takh, and here I thought you were all clueless. I’ve heard of the effort these humans went through to get Chao and Luca together. Would you like me to ask them to perform a similar effort for you and Corporal McCoy? Hmmm? It would make for quite the photo-op, as the humans would say.”
Takh felt a bit of panic, somehow. “No!” His panicked reply was low, hopefully not picked up by the surrounding cameras. “I mean, she’s so small. I could hurt her…assuming she wants to be romantic, of course.”
“Romantic? Takh, I admit I am still learning about human body language but trust me…if you want that, she wants that.” She pondered the humans in the room still going through some last-minute checks of their pressure suits. “Let’s put it this way. If you don’t make a move, then I just might ask Dhuz if it’s okay to add a human to our harem when we get back.”
“What?”
“I have learned quite the delightful human phrase. It is, as they say, Time To Nut Up Or Shut Up. I do find McCoy really cute, after all. As do you.”
Her XO grumbled semi-silently for a bit. “Fair enough, Captain. I’ll ask her. While we’re out there.”
“Good.” The humans in the clean room were now about finished with their checks, and Sadaf felt a bit of a thrill. She was, after all, witness to a species taking their first steps into a larger universe.
Five hoses were now shoved into five chest-mounted receptacles, each hose leading to its own hand-held air-conditioning unit. Another complicated round of checks, slaps, and thumbs-ups then followed.
“They do know that we’re just going to walk beside them right into the landing boat, right?” asked Takh. “This whole process isn’t really necessary.”
“Let them have this moment,” said Sadaf with a gentle smile. “They’re having fun.”
__________
The five white-suited individuals emerged from the hallway to pretty much universal uproar, both in person and online. The suit color was all NASA, but the logos were not. All four wore the emblem of the United Nations at their shoulder, a pair of olive branches surrounding a polar view of the world. The four humans all did their bit and waved for the cameras. Those in charge of the cameras did as instructed, and ignored the two black-and-sliver figures behind the quartet. The latter weren’t wearing any sort of pressure suit.
In the middle of the courtyard hovered the real talking piece, a landing boat from the Rithro. Its entry door was already lowered, and with another wave to the cameras from each of the five humans, they walked up the ramp and into the craft.
The five of them then looked at each other as the door began to close behind them. They’d trained together for a bit, enough to get a feel for each other. But now there was a real sense among them of holy shit what now?
Their mutual what-nows were interrupted as Tofa appeared. The arachnoid alien held a tray in one pedipalp, and upon that tray sat a little dish of what looked like Brazil nuts.
“Greetings!” chirped Tofa. “Welcome to Rithro Air, I assure you we have an excellent safety reputation. Well, almost excellent, if you don’t count the affair around Barnard’s Star. You may now take off your pressure suits. May I interest you in a nut?”
The four humans (and a few of the aliens) flinched as Ravindar let loose with a hearty belly-laugh. He reached up to undo his helmet while he beamed a brilliant white smile at their greeter. “You? I like you. We’re going to be fast friends.” He reached down to pluck a nut from the tray. “Madame? Do you want to take the first nut? Or should I taste it first?”
“Um…” For once, Parvati looked uncertain within her glass-and-cloth cocoon. “If you wish to taste, then please go ahead.”
“As you wish.” Ravindar held her eyes as he bit into the proffered nut. “It seems to be all right,” he pronounced.
After the great ceremony with which they’d been ensconced into their pressure suits, the humans then with reluctance emerged from their cocoons.
“We set up some chairs for everyone!” exclaimed Tofa, who gestured to the sides of the landing craft.
“Um, where do we put all of this?” asked Martinez as he held up a pressure-suit gauntlet.
The alien spider blinked. “Oh, right! Kexal, would you mind helping our guests stow their material?”
__________
The conference room at ULA now looked out over an even-greater bustle of activity. They were determined to at least match SpaceX in terms of tonnage-to-orbit; maybe they’d do so more efficiently? The mere notion had set a fire under everyone.
Joachim sat in a wheelchair while he studied those in front of him. “Ladies and gentlemen. I have, through some strange technological miracle, been re-granted the use of my mind. Not only that; they tell me that I and my wife might, if certain tests go well…we could become that which we once were. I intend to make sure that this gift does not go to waste. Not for me, nor for my wife, nor for the rest of humanity. Anyways. We have some aliens who need our help, we have some psychotic robot idiots who are fucking things up for everyone, and we need to get some serious tonnage into orbit as a result. Is that about the shape of things?”
“That’s pretty much the shape of it, sir,” said Dwight.
Joachim pointed a wrinkled finger at the speaker. “You. I’ve been caught up enough that I know you were the one to advocate for the use of Sea Dragon.”
“Just as a Hail Mary,” Dwight protested.
Clara cleared her throat. “I mean, I understand the enthusiasm but nobody has ever fired a pressure-fed engine that big. A single engine, mind you.”
Joachim rubbed his chin. “I understand your concern. But also keep in mind, this is a pintle injector, not a shower-head like they had on the F-1s on the Saturn-Five’s first stage. Pintle injectors were classified at the time. That’s a pity, because pintle injectors are safe as houses.”
Clara looked over at him. “Really?”
“Oh yeah, they’re pretty much bomb-proof.”
The team regarded the design now up on the screen. Clara was the first to speak their mutual thought. “Could…could we make this work?”
Joachim’s exclamation brought them all up short. “Of COURSE we can!” He thumped his cane into the floor for added emphasis. “Gentlemen…and ladies, please forgive me Clara…not one month ago I was a drooling wreck of a human. Today I come before you with my mind re-borne and in full function. I intend to make full use of that function. As does my wife, God bless her. We are going to set an example.”
Joachim stood, levering himself upright via his cane. “Here I stand,” he said. “Like Martin Luther before me, I can do no other.”
After a moment, everybody else in the conference room stood as well.
“Welp, we’re all standing,” said Dwight. “Okay, so what do we do now?”
Joachim pointed his cane at the screen. “Now, my dear Dwight, we Build. That. Fucking. Thing. We’re gonna show these Coalition assholes how we humans put some serious fucking tonnage into orbit.”
“Fuck yeah,” said Clara, as an unholy light came into her eyes.
“Fuck yes indeed,” replied Joachim. “The question now is, what do we put into it?”
The other people in the room looked at each other, just before bursting out into exclamations as to what they wanted put into that first launch. It was the sound of people on an expense account to beat the band.

According to the latest report by Reports and Data, it is projected that the global fall protection market will reach a value of USD 4.86 billion by 2028, with a compound annual growth rate (CAGR) of 7.9% during the forecast period. The market growth is primarily driven by various factors such as the increasing popularity of recreational activities like rock climbing, ice climbing, zip-lining, bungee jumping, and mountaineering. Additionally, the rising number of on-site training programs, strict safety regulations for workers, and the growing need to reduce workplace injuries are expected to further boost the market. Furthermore, the ongoing development of the construction and mining industries worldwide is also anticipated to contribute to the market's revenue growth.
Fall protection equipment can be categorized into two main types: on-body and off-body products. On-body equipment includes body belts, safety nets, connecting devices, and suspension belts, which are worn or attached to the worker's body to prevent falls. This equipment is widely used in various industries such as construction, telecom, mining, transportation, and energy & utility.
In terms of regional analysis, North America is expected to exhibit a significantly fast revenue growth rate during the forecast period. Developed countries like the United States and Canada have implemented strict regulations mandating the use of fall protection equipment in different industries. Increasing concerns for worker safety are also expected to drive market growth in this region. Europe accounted for the second-largest revenue share in the global market in 2020. The rapid development of sectors like utilities, transportation, and telecom, along with the increasing number of construction projects, is projected to drive market growth in this region.
Get a sample copy of the Fall Protection Market report: https://www.reportsanddata.com/download-free-sample/1229
Here are some key highlights from the report:
​

• In July 2020, McNetiq introduced a new range of magnetic anchors for fall protection, designed for use in various areas such as cranes, windmills, ship decks, shipbuilding, and construction platforms.
• The construction segment is expected to witness a faster revenue CAGR throughout the forecast period, driven by the ongoing development of the construction sector in emerging countries, increased awareness of worker safety, and high demand for fall protection equipment.
• The access system segment accounted for the largest revenue share in the global market in 2020, attributed to the rising use of access systems in confined spaces.
• Asia Pacific accounted for a 25.2% revenue share in the global market in 2020 and is projected to experience a faster revenue CAGR over the forecast period, supported by technological advancements, population growth, and rapid industrialization.
• Key players in the global market include 3M Company, Honeywell International Inc., MSA Safety Inc., Werner Co., GF Protection Inc., SKYLOTEC GmbH, W.W. Grainger, Inc., Total Access, Kee Safety, Inc., and FallTech.

The global fall protection market has been segmented by Reports and Data based on type, end-use, and region. The types of fall protection equipment include soft goods, hard goods, rope grab, manual fall arrester, fall arrester, anchors, retractable blocks, karabiners, installed system, rescue kit, access system, aerial lifts, manually propelled elevating work platforms, vehicle-mounted elevating and rotating lifts, boom-supported elevating work platforms, self-propelled elevating work platforms, scissor lifts, and others. The end-use industries encompass construction, general industry, oil & gas, energy & utilities, telecom, transportation, mining, and others. The market has been further segmented by region, including North America (U.S., Canada,
Fall Protection Market: Drive factors
Several driving factors contribute to the growth of the fall protection market:

1. Increasing preference for recreational activities: The rising popularity of recreational activities such as rock climbing, ice climbing, zip-lining, bungee jumping, and mountaineering drives the demand for fall protection equipment to ensure participant safety.
   
2. Stringent safety regulations: The presence of strict regulations governing workers' safety in various industries compels employers to invest in fall protection equipment, driving market growth.
   
3. Surging need to reduce workplace injuries: With a growing emphasis on employee safety, there is a rising demand for fall protection equipment to prevent workplace injuries and reduce accidents, fostering market growth.
   
4. Rise in on-site training programs: The increasing number of on-site training programs focused on safety awareness and fall prevention measures encourages the adoption of fall protection equipment, boosting market growth.
   
5. Ongoing development in construction and mining industries: The continuous growth and expansion of construction and mining industries worldwide necessitate the use of fall protection equipment, creating a significant demand in the market.
   

Overall, the combination of safety regulations, increasing awareness of worker safety, and the need to prevent workplace injuries are key drivers behind the growth of the fall protection market.
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Hi everyone!
I’ve recently bought a 2014 Skoda Superb 1.6 TDi that’s done a hefty 236k for cheap for a kind of restoration project. Needless to say, it’s seen better days mechanically and cosmetically. I’ve managed to learn and complete a major service, replace the entire braking system and had a new AC motor in, there’s a few other jobs need doing but it certainly drives loads better.
On the cosmetic side, the body has been battered with contamination, Chips, scuffs and even some detached and aging trim. I’ve managed to give the bodywork a good going over (first time doing any related work).
Getting to the main point (finally)… As we’re all aware the cost of living is quite frankly a kick in the dick for everybody, everything is expensive and affording them is just abysmal. But this project, or newfound hobby if you care to call it that, keeps me sane and grounded from all the stressors and hussle & bussle.
Aside from quality paint correction kit which I’ve been fortunate to acquire over the past few months. Can any typically found household cleaning products work wonders for either exteriointerior jobs?? Or do you happen to use any budget brands that work wonders such as Simoniz etc??

Hello and God bless you all. I am in deep trouble. I’ve been getting closer to God and pursuing Him but lately I find myself not following Him or listening to His commands. I forgot to fast, I haven’t been reading the Bible and today I experienced a harsh spiritual attack on my mind and body. I ask that you will please pray for my salvation— the devil is working hard and I can feel myself weaker than usual. I don’t want to go back into the hell I was living in. I need God and without Him, I’m doomed. Thank you & god is good

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Hi all! New to the sub but i've been lurking for a while.
I have a 6mo baby who used to be a star sleeper, and i'd love some input on how I can get her back on track.
ISSUES

• Has been having short (30/40min) naps since 3mo. I tried every possible combination of 3-nap WWs (starting at 2/2/2/2.5 at the beginning, which lengthened naps for three glorious days, and landed at 2.25/2.5/2.5/3 where i'm currently at).
  • I used to extend every nap by contact napping/resettling to make sure she slept an adequate amount in the day (3/3.25h). As I had to go back to work, I started doing Crib Hour for the first nap and this has only worked twice. She wakes up calm, doesn't cry, complains a bit and yawns but if she wakes up she's never gone back to sleep. She's with our wonderful nanny all day (not daycare), so our Nanny manages to rescue Nap 2 so she sleeps for 1.5/2hrs, but this isn't really sustainable for her on the long run.
  • QUESTION: I presume she's still tired as a short catnap surely isn't enough to get her through the next WW, but are Naps developmental? She wakes happy as a clam, and I read that naps should start consolidating around 5/6 months but that hasn't happened yet for us, so I'm wondering if Crib Hour will ever work if her little body is just developmentally incapable of connecting sleep cycles yet? Is there anything we can do to help her? I just want to make sure we're setting her up for success. If need be, i'll ask our Nanny to keep rescuing all naps until she eventually "gets it" (how and when remains a mystery LOL). Alternatively - could she survive on cat naps alone now that I’m back at work? Not sure how that would work out schedule wise but open to it.
• We often have EMWs - DWT was 7am, but sometime last month she started waking up at 5.15/5.30. We changed DWT to 6.30 to meet her halfway & bumped our last WW up, and now she wakes up at/slightly after 6am. So that's improved... even though it's nowhere near our initial DWT, which she used to sleep to without issues until recently. She's night-weaned and goes to bed around 7.30/7.45pm (depending on naps/WWs). She used to sleep closer to 10.75/11hrs overnight but now we're at 10/10.5, which seems like a big drop in such a short period of time?
  • QUESTION: Anything I can do to help fix that issue?

As a FTM I'm quite clueless LOL but I'm lucky to have someone at home who can help me "follow a schedule" while I'm at work all day M-F.
Any and all scheduling tips/short nap tips/success stories of babies in similar positions are much appreciated! Thank you!

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I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but I’m totally in love with the scene and just want it in a lotion form. Maybe it reminds of something from one of those bath and body works lotions I had in middle school, hah. Any idea what it could be?? Maybe peony?? Sweet pea??