My daughter is 14, she’s grown up listening to the genre, going to shows with us,she has way way way more of an artistic ability than I could have ever dreamed of having, I always just thoroughly enjoyed the music but always knew I didn’t have the patience or artistic ability to make playing an instrument a hobby so I am clueless. Her birthday is coming up and I would love to get her something to play but I’m not sure. Does anyone have any recommendations getting a 14 year old girl an instrument? She absolutely loves Helen from Carly Cosgrove so I was thinking getting a bass guitar and an amp? What do I need to do to make it happen for her to play? We are just a small town family with a 3 bedroom home definitely no sound proof rooms but I’m willing to do whatever. I know I sound pretty foolish on this post I’m well aware of that but if anyone can help me out with advice, I would really really appreciate it
TLDR me and my daughter both love the genre and I want to gift her an instrument for her birthday, advice needed

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A guy friend and I were pretty close. When we had initially met, we used to flirt 24/7. Then we stopped because I started dating someone. After that relationship came to an end, our friendship grew. Fast forward to 2020, my friend had got himself a girlfriend. At this point I had feelings for him and it was very obvious but I refused to act on them. Initially when we first met and started flirting, he told me he had no interest in a long distance relationship and I respected that. It was June of last year when my friend came to me. He was drinking heavily and wanted to talk to me about his relationship. I never bothered to ask because it was never any of my business but he had a lot to say. Supposedly he was thinking about breaking up with her because they are two different people from different upbringings. They would argue constantly and there was no intimacy. I was completely shocked and told him to just think it over. So we continued on with our night. It happened again two weeks later except this time he’s calling me crying on the phone. They had gotten into a really big argument and she brought up breaking up. He was deceaseds that she would even have that thought. From that night all the way til February this became a reoccurring thing. He would call or text me drinking wanting to talk about how much he can’t stand his girlfriend and how he doesn’t want to be with her. Despite my feelings I kept telling him things were gonna work out and to just talk to her. March Madness was pretty mad this year because I had rediscovered feelings for an ex. My friend on the other hand swore up and down he was at his boiling point. He came up with this plan to either break up with her in April before his college graduation or to propose to her. What confused and bothered me the most was how angry he was this time drinking. He called her a bitch, said that I text him more than she does on a daily basis, and that she was lying to him. He went on to say that she complains all the time, refuses to meet his friends, and doesn’t wanna leave the house. He said it takes her anywhere between 6-7 hours to respond even though she doesn’t have a job. She had apparently came up to him at his Super Bowl party and said she had to leave. She told him she was going home. Later on her parents had called him and his parents trying to find her blah blah. Turns out she was hanging out with her make cousin and his guy friend group. The times where he has tried to initiate intimacy she rejects him immediately. He also went on to say that he regrets ever asking her out. This was the very last time he gripped to me about her. A few weeks after I decided to tell him I how I felt about him. At that point whatever feelings I had for him had diminished the night he was going in about their relationship. I told him and he pretty said he didn’t know and he’s never liked me like that. I shrugged it off to an extent because I was more focused on my ex. I was a bit annoyed because I’m a pretty obvious flirt and for him to say he never knew was like mind boggling. Ever since our last conversation he is pretty much ignoring me. He’ll look at the group messages and respond to everyone else. He maintains our streak but that’s about it. I’d really hate to throw away our friendship because I decided to be honest with him but I really don’t know what I should do. Should I just ignore it or confront him or?

I'm so stressed and angry right now, everything has been a huge mess. My family has always been struggling financially since my mom has been the bread winner alone, as my dad doesn't speak English at all (my mom's English skill is about the typical immigrant level). My dad worked as a food delivery guy previously and often got held at gunpoint, robbed, and even had his car stolen 2-3 times. Which basically cancels out almost all the money he has earned. Just maybe 3 years ago, my dad's sister (who has experience of starting up 3+ restaurants before) suggested starting a business along with her nephew (my cousin). Compared to what my dad had to do before, this was obviously such a wonderful opportunity. So they ended up starting this business which I'll just call FoodPlace, where my aunt currently lives (~4 hours away by plane). It was split 40-40-20 (aunt-cousin-dad) for the shares. FoodPlace was such a success they won a local award, and had several news articles written about it.
Which sounds like things are working out, except the whole internal part is a mess. They all worked within the kitchen along with the other staffs, but my aunt and her husband deliberately gave my dad harder physical work because they were in charge of the "managing work". They keep him out of conversations too, although my dad does struggle with his cognition and conversing, I don't think they should've done that as he was a shareholder too. Eventually my cousin pulled out and sold his share according to the current value of the business. My family suggested to my dad to not buy half of that because we could already see that our cousin left because he could feel my aunt and her husband brewing trouble. But my dad, who's never really had the opportunity to provide for his family took the risk because this was the one time he actually was able to earn money, and even more than my mom. We were finally having money. He even ends up buying a house all the way over there, which we are still currently paying off.
But everything started spiraling down after my cousin left because at least he was also holding some power so my aunt and her husband couldn't really make too much trouble. Because now they have 60%, and my dad 40%, they're considered the owners and such. Their daughter embezzled money a bit here and there through usage of the business' credit card for personal matter. They started picking fights with my dad during restaurant hours. Complaining all he does is sit around but he hurt his back with the hard labor they gave him, and he was just sitting because the food prep at that time doesn't require him to be standing. When holidays rolled around, they wouldn't let him take days off to come home to visit us saying they are very busy. But they close the restaurant as they wish to go on vacations themselves. At some point they even had the audacity to ask my dad for the contract paper and thankfully no matter how much he struggled cognitively, he didn't give it to them, because that was his only proof of his share. They got so pissed after that. Fights escalated and we finally found out why. They were trying to kick my dad out, they had open another restaurant down the road. Exact same name and concept, just with a 2 slapped on it. So FoodPlace 2... without even notifying my dad of such and they are already mid negotiating the sale of the current business with the new owner. Basically the restaurant got so successful they wanted it all for themselves.
Fast forward to recently, just a few months ago. THEY SOLD THE RESTAURANT. Without my dad's signature. It was sold for 700k and they tried to do it without letting my dad find out, even had my dad teach the new owner all the recipes. When we found out we were furious and said we took part in this restaurant too. We invested our money, sweat, and blood into this restaurant too. My mom even helped out at the restaurant every time she went to visit my dad, without expecting or receiving any pay. We tried to demand our 40% cut of it as per contract, but they denied us saying they helped us and that that should be good enough. We said that's not right and demanded just our original investment back, even though she paid my cousin the percentage base off of their current value. She gave us a small check and said take this money. My dad did not accept it, but they ended up slipping it between the accounting stuff they handed to my dad which we found out only a few weeks later. Then they go around telling our family members (my dad's side of the family) about how we earned hundred of thousands (which we did not) and that we're being greedy for asking for money from the sale. And how they starting having marital disputes and their family is falling apart just because we are asking for the money that belongs to us, which they earned from the sale that they did without our consent. With this huge mess, and my parents already stressed enough, they figured they'll just cash the small check which was only about a tenth of our investment cause they said how about they pay us bit by bit. But we knew she was cunning and was trying to trick us, but we figured alright we'll trust her. The check bounced... Eventually we ended up having to get a lawyer involved because it was a huge sum of money that we put in and we just wanted our original investment back as we were still paying our cousin back every month for the half of his share which we bought. They went berserk and started yelling at us and crying to their parents about how the money belongs to them. As this was our first time dealing with lawyers, we thought we could just trust the process to them. But we basically ended up paying $4,500 just for them to send a single letter to my aunt saying we want to settle privately. As for why we are not taking this to court? My dad is naïve and holds family really close, he trusted his sister still after everything just up until this month when he found out all the lies she's been telling everyone. All my years of being alive, this was the first time I saw my dad cried. Not just once, almost every time now after he calls with his family. His mom doesn't care about him, tells him to just let it be. His brother acts kind says he'll help be a middle man in front of us, but then when he thought it was just the two of them scolded my dad and told him he handles everything on his own why is my dad unable to do it? Then proceeds to tell my dad alone that he will not be helping. Meanwhile we were put in a standstill because our lawyer told us my dad can't say anything or do anything because anything and everything can be evidence. Meanwhile, my aunt cleaned up their mess and said they retract the sale and now they're just selling it for $300k. We don't even know if anything is going on under the table, as they never gave my dad any power (as in he did not even have access to the card under the business even though she gave it to her daughter, and etc). Now they are trying to wiggle their way out by saying they'll negotiate with my dad if we cancel the thing with our lawyers??? If they didn't do anything illegal, there should be nothing for them to be afraid of. Obviously if we take it to court and had evidence of their dealings, we would definitely win. Although we have some, we don't have sufficient evidence and the cost and time it would take is not worth it for my parent's mental and physical health. Plus we were just trying to settle, we gave up on getting the percentage off current value long ago because this has been going on for months and my family is all stressed out from it. We just want our original investment back but they still want to keep going in circles. They also have the money and time to keep doing this but we don't. We barely had any to begin with, we took out loans and borrowed money to invest in this business. Why are they like this? They own multiple properties, even have rental properties and already own their big house in a nice neighborhood. It's not like we are asking for an unreasonable amount, just our original back now. They even kept trying to get my dad to travel back and forth to negotiate because their parents also currently lives where my family lives. Recently I was finally able to visit my dad to help sell the house and gosh the house was big and beautiful, we finally had our own home. I started breaking down because I just thought about how much he went through to finally buy us a house and how he must've been so lonely and enduring so much living here all alone with his cognitive impairment and not knowing English at all. And now we are getting ready to sell the house so that he can move back in with us back where we currently live and be a whole family again. I'm so stressed that I've been thrown into all this legal stuff because I have to help out as my parents have limited English unlike my aunt and her husband, and having to suddenly be an adult because my parents are already carrying so much responsibilities right now. At the same time I'm so angry for how manipulative my aunt, not really of their family just because I know they never really cared for my dad as he wasn't a very bright son/brother of theirs, but it's still absolute crap. I don't even know what to do now except that I have to work harder to find a job so that I can share the burden and not have it all lay on my parents especially my mom who almost basically raised us as a single mom and took care of us very well to make up for both parent roles and give us a good upbringing. There's already so much other personal matter going on and having this on top, I feel like my head is about to pop TT It's all too stressful
TLDR; My dad owns a restaurant business with my aunt (40-60 respectively). They opened a new restaurant with same name, just a 2 slapped on it and pick fights with my dad on purpose to kick him out. My aunt then sells the restaurant without consent of my dad for $700k. We want our rightful money back. They scream and throw tantrum. We want our original investment back. They manipulate and lie to everyone around them saying we don't deserve it, she loves her brother, she's offered so much help to my dad. We get lawyer involved, they retract their sale and now say it's sold for $300k. We have no evidence because my dad who was alone in this far away place alone to start this business with my aunt is cognitively impaired and trusted his sister. Still won't even give us our initial investment back.
TTLDR; My aunt is trying to scam my family, I'm stressed.

A guy friend and I were pretty close. When we had initially met, we used to flirt 24/7. Then we stopped because I started dating someone. After that relationship came to an end, our friendship grew. Fast forward to 2020, my friend had got himself a girlfriend. At this point I had feelings for him and it was very obvious but I refused to act on them. Initially when we first met and started flirting, he told me he had no interest in a long distance relationship and I respected that. It was June of last year when my friend came to me. He was drinking heavily and wanted to talk to me about his relationship. I never bothered to ask because it was never any of my business but he had a lot to say. Supposedly he was thinking about breaking up with her because they are two different people from different upbringings. They would argue constantly and there was no intimacy. I was completely shocked and told him to just think it over. So we continued on with our night. It happened again two weeks later except this time he’s calling me crying on the phone. They had gotten into a really big argument and she brought up breaking up. He was deceaseds that she would even have that thought. From that night all the way til February this became a reoccurring thing. He would call or text me drinking wanting to talk about how much he can’t stand his girlfriend and how he doesn’t want to be with her. Despite my feelings I kept telling him things were gonna work out and to just talk to her. March Madness was pretty mad this year because I had rediscovered feelings for an ex. My friend on the other hand swore up and down he was at his boiling point. He came up with this plan to either break up with her in April before his college graduation or to propose to her. What confused and bothered me the most was how angry he was this time drinking. He called her a bitch, said that I text him more than she does on a daily basis, and that she was lying to him. He went on to say that she complains all the time, refuses to meet his friends, and doesn’t wanna leave the house. He said it takes her anywhere between 6-7 hours to respond even though she doesn’t have a job. She had apparently came up to him at his Super Bowl party and said she had to leave. She told him she was going home. Later on her parents had called him and his parents trying to find her blah blah. Turns out she was hanging out with her make cousin and his guy friend group. The times where he has tried to initiate intimacy she rejects him immediately. He also went on to say that he regrets ever asking her out. This was the very last time he gripped to me about her. A few weeks after I decided to tell him I how I felt about him. At that point whatever feelings I had for him had diminished the night he was going in about their relationship. I told him and he pretty said he didn’t know and he’s never liked me like that. I shrugged it off to an extent because I was more focused on my ex. I was a bit annoyed because I’m a pretty obvious flirt and for him to say he never knew was like mind boggling. Ever since our last conversation he is pretty much ignoring me. He’ll look at the group messages and respond to everyone else. He maintains our streak but that’s about it. I’d really hate to throw away our friendship because I decided to be honest with him but I really don’t know what I should do. Should I just ignore it or confront him or?

I don't know if I'm posting this in the right subreddit.. going through a separation, feeling lost, alone, numb. I just want to know what or who I'm dealing with because I feel like after 7 years of being with this person I don't really know him at all.
He is dismissive avoidant that's for sure. But other things have made me question if there's more, maybe Narcissist or sociopathy.
The beginning: He was the perfect guy in the beginning, we talked for hours, so many hours on the phone, messaging, we were long distance he's from Europe I'm from Canada. He would surprise me with flowers hed pick on the way to see me, take me everywhere. We went to concerts, everything.
Eventually things changed, the effort was gone. No more effort, no more intimacy or seriously lack there of. I started getting anxious and arguing more because I felt like he was pulling away.
Fast forward...
He lies all the time about literally nothing significant, just lies all the time. I can confront him with proof and he will continue to lie, or blame it on me.
No ability to self reflect, makes everything my fault. Or hell say "okay I'm the worst person ever I am just a terrible person and I'll never be enough for you" while literally not even giving the bare minimum.
He will turn everything into my fault, I know I stated this but I cannot exaggerate this enough, if he decides on something and I try to tell him it won't work... And then it ends up not working, he will then blame me and say I should have just trusted my own instinct then. He literally blames me for everything..
He ignores me constantly. So many times I'll talk or say something and he'll just blatantly ignore me. He acts like I don't exist, I have started to feel so invisible. And if I react or get upset he says "relax I didn't hear you" but this happens all the time.. he will sometimes just blatantly ignore texts too.
He has no real relationships or friendships? He said he had a group of friends he was so close with but as soon as we started dating he stopped hanging out with them and that all just stopped... I remember I would encourage him to see them and he just always said he preferred to be with me... But when when I came back to Canada he didn't see them or mention them. before he moved to Canada, I kept encouraging him to see them again before coming home, at least to say bye to them before leaving..but he didn't go.
He isn't close with his family, I talk to his mom more than he does, I feel bad because I can tell she's lonely and misses him, I always have to remind him to contact her or to try and call / FaceTime with her and he gets so annoyed. He also hates his sister. He hates her, has no contact with her what so ever, and I've asked him so many times why does he hate her so much and have no contact and he never really gave me a reason.
He shows no empathy or remorse. He doesn't really seem to feel bad about anything. Sometimes I wonder if his feelings are even real. My cousin died unexpectedly and he was extremely annoyed by my crying and I wanted to be close to my family at the time they lived in a different city, but he was extremely annoyed and inconvenienced. He never gave condolences, he was just extremely annoyed by it all. He has a truck, they needed a truck to grab her belongings, I offered his truck I just assumed he would be fine, well big mistake, he was so annoyed by it, he didn't show them but behind their backs he was so annoyed that he had to lend his truck and just didn't want to be bothered.
I just brushed this off thinking he didn't know my cousin never met her so it was normal to not have feelings about it. But some time after his uncle passed away, I told him I was so sorry and asked if he wanted to talk about it. (He never talks about feelings)...but he didn't care, he wasn't bothered, he seemed annoyed I even mentioned it, he said his uncle lived a terrible lifestyle and that he had been warned and had so many heart attacks prior to this because of his lifestyle so that he had it coming.
I don't know him, he doesn't talk to me about anything really, I feel like I married a total stranger.
He gaslights me, he's done things that I am sure are purposeful to make me crazy. I've made a separate post about that, and remembered some other occurances where similar things have happened.
Examples: My car keys went missing for some time. He drives my car and has his own set of keys. My keys were missing and I asked if he had taken them he said no and he insisted I was the only one who would ever use them... I didn't have my keys for some time... Finally, he says he found them in the glove box and told me I must have put them there and not remembered..but why would I do that? That makes no sense? How can I drive my own car and then have the keys in the glove box? How would I lock the car after? That just made no sense but I was left feeling so confused.
He's been sleeping on the couch, the other night I woke in the middle of the night my phone had the cover taken off. I asked if he had taken my phone cover off and he looked at me as if I was crazy and asked why would he ever do that...but ironically he then offered to sleep in our bed with me since I must be creeped out... I told him I didn't need him there but he insisted and has been sleeping there since. It's just all so strange.
So, is this all typical for a dismissive avoidant? Or any thoughts if I'm dealing with something different?
He is perfectly fine being roomates, he does not care we don't talk so I know he doesn't care to be with me but I think he's comfortable with me, I do everything. I do our taxes, take care of finances, all house work, he does help with our son, and after years of arguing to contribute in house he now also helps with dishes most days, helps with garbages, so he has definitely started to make some changes there... But in terms of our relationship it's like I don't exist to him.
He does not show grandiosity or doesn't seem like he cares to be admired or looks for attention so I feel like as much as there are Narcissist qualities I don't think it's Narcissm. He's extremely introverted. Hates going out, hates socializing, never takes us to work events never wants to attend them himself, he just likes cars, motorcycles, playing video games, staying home, really that's all.
Oh I would and still continue to try and do gifts, birthdays special occasions father's days, he has stopped all effort and then blames me for it. Examples - mother's day
I spent mother's day with my sister and son, he told me I ruined mother's day ...
He always gets stuff last minute and hell say "I'll be back, I need to get "some things" the night before an event like mother's day. Sorry if I'm asking for too much but that makes me feel like crap I feel like its just last minute thought running errands type thing so I told him not to worry about it. That's why it's my fault that mother's day was "ruined" and I didn't get anything.
I don't even need anything he could have just made a reservation for breakfast or something. This has been every mother's day, my son is 3.
Anyways.. sorry for the long post... Hope at least one person reads this....

does anyone else feel almost like they did whenever they were a kid and had to tell their parents something even as an adult? My parents were semi-strict. They're extremely judgmental and closed minded, anything that's different to them or out of the norm is "weird" or they just don't get it.. I still as a 32-year-old cannot be open and honest with my parents about everything and I feel like we would be a lot closer if I could be. I KNOW we would be a lot closer.. I feel like their narrow point of view on life and also their political and religious views make them extremely intimidating to talk to as a millennial and as their daughter because I don't want to get judged and don't want to get into an argument that is literally never ending.. they could be presented straight facts and they would still go babbling on about some nonsense that they believe and and how what they believe is right. They can't help but force their ideals about politics and religion and how people should be living their lives down my throat every chance they get. I'll try to have a normal conversation with them.. If they make some out-of-pocket comment about Democrats or make racist comments, I'll ask them why they believe what they believe or why they think what they think and they just can never provide me actual logical answers that are rooted in reality, especially my mom. She makes the most racist comments all the time, for literally no apparent reason, unprovoked, she'll just start talking about somebody she sees on the street and she also makes fat comments so she fat shames people, makes comments about gay people, but mainly her target is people who aren't white and Republican always says "well that's the Democrats for you.." or "thank the Democrats" I'll be asking her what she means by that and how the Democrats are solely responsible of whatever she's accusing them of, she never has any answers. It's like she's just spewing stuff she has no idea about. She hates the way I dress. She hates my job. She hates pretty much everything I do and everything is weird except for the stuff she finds acceptable which in a lot of ways I find the way she does things.. outdated, nonsenical, and lacking compassion for others in HUGE way. My dad is generally a great man but I have some of the same issues with him.. He's a little less judgmental than my mother so I can talk to him a little bit more but I can never fully be open and honest with my family and I so very much wish I could.

TLDR: M20 and F20 just broke up last weekend, knew the breakup was planned 2 months in advance (when she leaves from her exchange program), love and cherish her being my first love, post-breakup I don't feel sad or lonely about it and want to move on (I crave companionship) but it feels wrong this early
I (20M) and my recently ex-girlfriend (20F) dated from December until last weekend. I felt an instant connection and just from a few days after meeting I knew I was a fool to not try. The problem was the fact that she was an exchange student from the UK, only here until June. We both know we weren't the smartest going into a relationship knowing this, that y'all don't gotta tell me about, but it was someone I connected to the most and my genuine first love.
Over two months ago, we had the big discussion of what happens when she goes home, and came to the conclusion that we would break up, I need the physicality of someone with me and she needs the consistency of seeing her S.O. often. We knew we couldn't provide it for each other. We both agreed that we still love each other, but we will not be together because it wouldn't be feasible and we want the best for each other. I still love her and will always cherish her as my first love and the person who understands me the most, but we both agreed to move on and find someone else.
We officially broke up last weekend when she went home, I feel like I should be heartbroken and really sad, but I'm not. My way of thinking is that I've had enough time to process the initial sadness of the decision to break up. I know this sort of relationship with a deadline isn't normal and it has different circumstances, but I feel bad given the fact that I already don't feel sad about it. We plan to stay in contact (and still currently text), but I feel like I should be feeling at least something (sad, lonely, etc.) given the fact that this is a breakup but I don't. This being my first major relationship I also don't really know what the next steps are, and a timeline (in theory), as in given that we've known about and come to terms with the breakup two months before it actually happened I've no idea to proceed.

Hi
I've just started a contracting gig. Normally i try and just keep my head down and do what's asked of me, but they seem unusially open to suggestions when it comes to potential process improvements.
They've currently got me doing mobile builds, and due to [reasons] it is expected that devices be handed over to the users fully "good to go"
The ammount of button pushing required to enroll / ensure defender etc is up and running is beyond the ken of the users, and embarking on an education program would only generate befuddlement and invite the wrath of upper-management.
At the moment the best senario i can come up with is -

"Hello [user], you have two choices -

1. You can come down to IT, enter your password then hang around ~30 mins to enter it again at the 2nd prompt once required apps have pushed out, then come back an hour later once everything else has finished updating.
2. Or You can give me permission to reset your password so that i can set your phone up for you, then set the "must change" flag when i'm done."

This technically "works" but .... Both options leave a lot to be desired!
I've been banging my head against a wall trying to come up with something to pitch as a suggestion for a more sane way of going about it.... As there's just got to be a better way of doing white-glove android deployments than this!!!
Initially i thought i might be able to do something with impersonation permissions, but AFAIK that's not applicable on mobile. Then i was wondering if you could just use a generic enrolement account before reassigning the device to the user but... That was also a non-starter.
My only current "bright" idea would be that perhaps pitching enabling passwordless (optionally restricted via CA locations if they don't want to roll it out org-wide) and granting us the auth administrator role to spit out temporary access passes might juke you through enrolement / MFA registration.
I'm not sure if it'd work (fat chance Microsoft would let you get away with something as convinent as that) and sadly i've got no way of testing it at home currently.
Does anyone know if this would work and/or if there's some other more sensible way of going about it?

Okay, this is going to be a long one, so please, bear with me.
I (22F) am in a little friend group of girls from my high school Heather (22F) and Kenzie (22F), so we’ve known eachother for a pretty long time now. We tend to see eachother at least once a month but generally I am closer with Heather. Kenzie is a very particular girl, she likes male attention, especially the older ones’ and generally loves to be the center of attention. She also loves to play the victim in a lot of situations and at the same time she always proclaims herself as the “villain” in everyone’s story when there’s a conflict going on. Sometimes it can be very hard hanging out with her. Especially when there’s boys to impress around, she becomes unbearable.
Kenzie did drop a few hints about having mental health issues and seeing a therapist which quote “lead to nowhere so she stopped going”. She’s also a child of a divorce and has been brought up by a mom who always put her older sister on the pedestal. Generally, she does not open up much but I thought we got very close as we stuck together through quarantine and even going our separate ways to different universities. That was, until yesterday when my other friend Heather found out she’s been cheating on her boyfriend Greg (37M) with Thomas (38M).
To give you a little backstory we all worked together on a work project so that’s where Kenzie met both Greg and Thomas. Kenzie’s always been into older men and trust me, she’s been with older ones, so it came as no surprise when she told us she was dating Greg after he was pursuing her for about six months. Unlike all the other sketchy relationships she was in, this one seemed quite normal, steady and calm, so we both thought it was all okay.
Heather and Greg met on another work project that required them to work long hours for two months straight which meant that Greg and Kenzie spent a lot of time apart. If you hadn’t noticed she’s pretty high maintenance, so it made her upset.
On Sunday we (the girls) hung out and everything seemed normal until Kenzie started to claim she had a headache and that she had to go home before Greg came over, so she left and we hung out for another hour or two with Heather.
The next day, Monday, Heather came over to Greg at work to ask if Kenzie was feeling better and lowe and behold, Greg had no idea what Heather was talking about. Apparently Kenzie texted him at 10PM saying that she was having such a good time that she lost track of time and just came home. She left us some time before eight, so at this point no one knew where she was for two hours, but she was clearly lying.
Greg’s suspicions grew and he decided to lay all of his problems on to Heather, wanting to see what she thought since she is her age and someone who is close to her. Heather stopped by my house after the talk because she didn’t know how to handle all the info so we discussed it and came to a conclusion that it just might be a relationship crisis.
That same night Greg texted Heather to please text him when she gets the chance, which she found odd but did anyways. Turns out he went to her house to talk to her because he has not been feeling good about their relationship for a couple of weeks now. She’s been disappearing for hours, not wanting to meet up and clearly lying about her whereabouts. She has reluctantly let him into her house after he just asked to pee before he took off and even made the excuse of not having cleaned up despite the house being completely spot free.
When he took off he waited for a few minutes behind a corner to see if there was really no one she was seeing. According to his words he also saw two plates and two glasses that have just been used at the kitchen table and when asked about it Kenzie said her mom stopped by on her way to a dinner with friends (made no sense).
After a few minutes he saw his colleague and friend Thomas come out of the car in front of her house, where he was waiting until the air was clear. Kenzie came out and, this part is messy, started to make out with him then and there. Greg stared to approach them but they haven’t noticed them until he was too close.
A confrontation went down and we don’t know the results of it yet.
Side note: Thomas is the type of guy that has about 15 girlfriends at the same time and never commits.
All of this is such a mess. Especially after the fact that Heather and I both thought Kenzie would never do such thing as cheat with no apparent reason. She has no clue that I ane Heather know about this either. The story is much more complex but I think this is enough for now.
I do have a few questions I need help with. I, myself, am a child of a divorce because of my dad cheating and I remember it being very messy. I view cheating as a very low thing to do (unless of course there are any understandable circumstances). So how do I talk to someone who did it and I consider a close friend? I also feel like it is not mine and Heather’s place to discuss this sort of thing, but at the end of the day, we also want to help our friend in case this is anything more serious.
I’m sorry for this being chaotic and maybe all over the place, but I feel like I need more views on this situation. I’ll be glad for any advice. If you have any questions, feel free to ask.

Hello-I am a 43 year old female. I had the first sign of HS at 8 years old, but not diagnosed until I was 21. In the student health clinic at my university of all places.
When I was first diagnosed, I was a severe case, under my arms, groin, and under my breasts. I tried everything recommended back then, and still had to have grafts under my arms and a large breast reduction. My groin was still a mess. I was afraid of surgery in that area, and never pursued it. To say that area is battered would be an understatement.
And then last summer, I started with flairs on my waist line on my right side. They’re quite painful. I was in a high level of stress for about 8 months (I lost my job, and had to move states to gain employment in my field). I was broke, depressed, and stressed about everything. When I moved to where I live now, I immediately established with a dermatologist. We tried some things. I we tried remicade, and now cosentyx. During it all, I was in some type flare. Nothing was working. The dermatologist would occasionally write me a prescription for pain medication. As a last resort, he said removing the diseased tissue is the only way to solve this. So, I agreed.
I had a large portion of my waistline remover, and the 10 inch incision about 1/2 inch below where my pants sit. Surgery was on 2/24/23. It was an out patient procedure. She basically made a flap and then sewed my skin together. Unfortunately, she did not remove ALL of the diseased tissue. And almost immediately the HS tunneled directly to the incision. It caused me to miss an additional week do work.
Since that time, I’ve had to wear a bandage in that area. I’ve been on antibiotics for months. It’s puffy and hard one day, but not the next. The only thing that is constant is the pain. I saw the surgeon every week for over a month. I had appointments with my PCP. I was having severe pain back in April and I went to ER (It was a Sunday afternoon). They did an ultrasound, and did not see any cyst or abscess underneath that area. It’s literally just the tunneling. Anyway, the dr gave me a pain pill in the ER and then sent me home with 10 more. Ok. I stretched them as long as I could. I was finally able to get in with my PCP the week before Memorial Day. During the visit, I told her that I’m in a debilitated state. I have to work from home about 90% of the time. My house is a mess. I haven’t been cooking. I’m pretty depressed. The dr and I (she is a family med resident) discussed my history, what has transpired since my surgery, my trip to the ER. We agreed that she would start me on Aleve and gave me 8 ultram for the severe days. To be clear, that was 8 for 14 days. Meanwhile, I was messaging her via the EMR. I told her I was still having pretty intense pain. I didn’t hear back for a couple of days. And then June 3 happened…
I woke up on Friday and my side was basically burning. It was hurting so badly. I called and tried to get in with my PCP, or another of her associates, but nothing was available. Well, I made the mistake of going to the ER. It was not busy. When I checked in my BP was 158/100. I was struggling. The ER Dr listened to me and stated that I needed a CT to make sure there isn’t anything that the US can’t see. I also had another US. And a bunch of blood work. They also gave me a shot of morphine. The surgical resident came down to see me. And then 2 hours later I was discharged. I got upset. I told them that I refused to leave until someone help me. Not give me drugs, but help me. Figure something out. I then asked for a patient advocate, and was told I had to call them. I was upset at that point. I regrettably yelled at the nurses, and for that I actually feel bad. The dr told me that my PCP has to help me. But she isn’t either. My pain was completely dismissed. I believe they called security because I saw one walking back that way. So? I left. I got in my car and just balled. I was mortified. Embarrassed. In pain. And no one cared to help even though I asked.
Forward to that evening. My PCP responded to my message. She wants to start me on Lyrica. I said yes, can I also have some more ultram for the acute pain. Today, I received a message from her stating that I need to speak to a behavioral pain specialist and that I may have complex region pain syndrome. I looked it up. It seems to be phantom pain. She also suggested that start on a course of narcan. To be clear, I signed a pain contract when she wrote me the ultram prescription. I do not take drugs for the sake of taking drugs. I’m in real pain, it isn’t fake or in my head, it’s the HS. I’m at my wits end. What do I do? I’ve been labeled a drug seeker for advocating for myself.

First and foremost, I know what I did made me an asshole. Which is why I immediately apologized as soon as I got home. I would have done it there but yelling is a trigger for me so I just fell apart. We were in a rush so I called asap.
Every time I display an emotion that isn’t nice, calm, cool, and collect- I get humiliated. I’m not perfect, I take responsibility when I’m wrong (even if it takes me a few hours to come to my senses), and I’m just human.
Overall I almost never loose my cool, but every now and then I do. I never yell or scream, and normally I take it out on myself. Or immediately apologize realizing what an asshole I am.
Went to the pharmacy to get some meds for my sciatica pain (I was at the ER yesterday) and I was 10¢ short on getting my pain medication. I asked if they could give me a couple of the pills and I’ll buy the remainder of the prescription on Friday. Since it was only a few pills they said they couldn’t. I tried asking if I could come back and pay on Friday or if either of them had 10¢. They just kept saying no so I said (said, not yelled) “y’all suck. “. The lady at the counter was visibly offended and started getting angry with me and I explained I didn’t say she sucked, or the pharmacist, I was just frustrated.
Go back to the car (my roommate was driving me) and explained I was short. They agreed to come in and pay for it (a mere $3.73¢), and when we got back to the pharmacy window the pharmacist started yelling (actually yelling) at me that I wasn’t welcome back to that pharmacy if I said something like that again. That I was rude and ungrateful for them helping me because they didn’t have to. Did I get frustrated again? Yes, ofc. Yelling is a trigger with me. This time I fell apart in tears though. All I told him (told firmly, not yelled) though was, “don’t you know how to handle upset customers? Don’t you understand when someone is having a bad day?”
So we left and on the way back to the car my roommate told me I humiliated them…”you humiliated me. You can’t just go talking to people that way. Being frustrated isn’t an excuse.” I know this. I full claim I was an asshole.
I felt like a stupid 16 year old child getting scolded by her dad. Meanwhile my roommate is 24, and I’m 32. Like I don’t know those things already. I also understand that while dealing with frustrated customers is a pain, that it just happens. I work in customer service- I get it. Sometimes it’s inevitable though, and I was taught to be empathetic, not angry at a customer. Thing is- I wasn’t throwing a temper tantrum, or even raising my voice.
When I got home I called the pharmacy and immediately apologized for being an asshole, and they apologized back. I knew what I did was wrong, and I never tried to use my frustration to justify things. I just said that I had that reaction because I was frustrated (and in pain).
What my roommate said humiliated me, though. Idk if I should talk to them about it or just let it go. Maybe I deserved their reaction. Thoughts ?
TLDR: was an asshole a

I would really appreciate some help here. I’m at a loss on what to do. Apologies for the really long post, TLDR below.
TLDR; I’m considering ending a relationship of 1.5 years with my girlfriend after her roommate and I got into several fights this past weekend over moving a couch into their apartment. Her roommate prohibited me from stepping foot inside ever again, threatened to call the cops on me, threatened to lawyer up, and accused me of aggravating her. She might have also punctured one of my car’s tires as it was flat the following day in their parking lot. My girlfriend has continuously said she understands the situation and will be coming to my place going forward, but I’m afraid of what might happen in the future since she shares her location with her roommate, have been friends for 17 years, have a matching tattoo together, and the roommate has shown to be a very explosive and volatile person. Her roommate has also been convicted in the past for assault and I’m afraid of what she might do. I feel like I don’t fully know my girlfriend and don’t know how to move forward. Should I leave the relationship or continue to fight?
A bit of a background
My girlfriend, let’s call her Ana, and I have been together for 1.5 years. We met through a cousin of mine at an outing back in December 2021 and started dating right away. Ana is caring, loyal, and has always listened to what I have to say. Our relationship has gone through some challenges, but nothing we have not talked through and somewhat agreed on - we see life differently to some extent when it comes to matters like politics and religion but have always sat down to talk through and resolve those issues. My parents did not get a good impression of Ana when I introduced them to each other, but she has worked hard to do so ever since. When we met I also asked her to go back to school to keep pursuing her degree, which she had stopped years ago, but listened to me and is currently on her second semester. It is important to note that Ana (and Betty, shortly introduced) was in a religion for 22 years that prohibited her from making friends outside of it. She left 5 years ago and had to cut all communication with her family.
While together, in June last year, I bought an apartment and moved about 1.5 hours north of her to be closer to my job. Ever since that happened we have had this sort of long distance relationship where we only see each other on the weekends - every other weekend Ana comes to visit me, staying overnight, while I do the same the weekends she does not.
Ana was living in an apartment by herself up until two months ago, when her lease was over and the landlord increased her rent by 30% or so. She had to go somewhere and asked if we could live together, to which I declined as I did not think we were ready - moving in together has been something I’ve refused to do because of a very sour experience with an ex-girlfriend. Since that was not an option, Ana decided to move into a new apartment with one of her best friends, Betty, who I barely knew. They decided to move about 30 minutes closer to me. Betty promised Ana she would take care of her, to some extent, by paying more than half of the rent and covering the security deposit. Ana does not make much money and has racked up some credit card debt which she is managing now, so the arrangement made her financially happy. It’s sort of important to note, however, that with the new arrangement Ana is paying about the same monthly rent. I helped her move out and into the new place with two other friends.
Betty and Ana have known each other for 17 or so years. They have traveled together and even during our relationship Ana, during the weekdays, has visited Betty overnight to watch movies and whatnot, without me there. At the start of our relationship Ana refused presenting me to Betty several times despite my insistence, because Betty had had serious fallouts with two of Ana’s friends and she was afraid I might not like her. Before meeting Betty I had a sense I would not like her when I noticed that Ana, when Betty texted, was afraid of not replying right away, which I thought was odd. I confronted her but she always ignored what I was saying. Other friends of Ana’s had also noticed the same. I ended up meeting Betty six months or so after Ana and I started dating, which was right after Betty’s ex broke up with her after almost five years of a verbal- and physically abusive relationship. Betty, I recently found out, has even been to jail before due to explosive episodes that have ended in physical aggression, and is currently trying to expunge her records. She was also adopted as a kid and her adoptive father has beat her for years in different occasions. Betty and I only hung out then, when we met for the first time, and one other time two months after, for her birthday. I never had any sort of altercation with her, but noticed she always had some fight with someone, always talking down on people and blaming others for her tragedies. Something that took me by surprise last year was when my girlfriend and Betty went one day to a tattoo parlor and got the same exact tattoo in the forearm as a sign of their friendship. Up until then my girlfriend only had two other tattoos that were very small - one by her ankle and another one by her ribcage. This one that she got with Betty is the only truly visible one. That day I remember being extremely surprised when she showed it to me, seeing how she had not even mentioned she was going to get a tattoo, but comes home with the biggest one she has had, and on the forearm.
Fast forward to Saturday: Betty and I lose it with each other
Moving forward to last weekend, I visited Ana at her apartment for only the second time in the last two months after she moved in. I drove over Saturday early in the morning and was greeted by my girlfriend making breakfast for me and her roommate. We all ate and Betty asked to spend the day with us, since she needed to go to the library to study for an exam, which my girlfriend and I had planned on doing, so that she could study for one of her classes. They also made me aware of a couch one of Betty’s friends was giving her for free, and Betty asked for my help to pick it up later. The day went well at the library (4 or so hours) but started to shift when we went out for late lunch after - Betty asked for spicy wings at a local bar and threw a fit when the wings came with not sauce, calling the manager of the place and insulting the cooks and staff. After that ordeal we went to UHAUL to rent a truck for the couch. Like idiots, we ended up breaking what we thought was the ignition key (it wasn’t, just an attached key for the back doors) inside the car’s key hole. This sent Betty screaming and insulting me, out of the blue, calling me an idiot and other words I cannot recall. I yelled back at her which only escalated the situation. UHAUL management stepped in and they got us a pickup truck at no additional cost. We live in a big city in South Florida. I drove with Ana in the middle seat and Betty on the passenger side for about 40 minutes to pick up the couch. It is 10PM on the dot when we get to the community where Betty’s friend lives. A security guard, as I parked the truck, approached us to say the HOA does not allow trucks at that time. Betty starts insulting him several times as I drive away and parked about half a block from the community, at a plaza right next to it. We proceeded, for the next two hours, to carry out the couch from a second floor to the first, moving it over a 5 feet wall (with me jumping over) to avoid going around the community, then walking with it for half a block and than putting it on the bed of the pickup truck. All in 90 degree humid weather.
As I am sweating and huffing while fastening the couch on the bed of the truck by myself, with Betty and Ana talking by the side of the truck, I notice Betty looks tired and miserable, to which I asked jokingly “why the long face?”. Betty proceeds to tell me I am not being funny with that question and starts to yell at Ana, saying how she is useless, how she herself (Betty) had to do everything regarding the couch and no one helped her, how “her man” (meaning me) was not able to afford a couch for her, and other stuff I cannot remember. She called me an idiot, and called me slick, and said I was not funny with my stupid jokes, and kept yelling I was not helpful. I started to yell back at her saying how it had been six hours since we had been helping her. I also, at that point, lost it all and said “where are your friends right now to help you? Holy shit, I am literally on the bed of this truck fastening your couch and you are so ungrateful”. I was yelling as she was yelling back, and in that moment the yelling match turned something like the following:
Betty - “you are so fucking useless, IT’S ALWAYS ME GETTING SHIT DONE, no help from anyone, ALWAYS ME”
Me - “what the fuck are you talking about? We are LITERALLY helping you right now, what the fuck”
Ana - “guys please stop, can’t we all just get along, please?”
Betty - “Bro you are not funny man, who the fuck said you are? I am so tired of your shit, your stupid comments and jokes throughout the day”
Me - “where the fuck are your friends to help you? You are so fucking ungrateful; you jump from dick to dick and will never find love, you have no fucking friends”
Betty - “WHAT THE FUCK. Your bitch is a whore man, she doesn’t even wear condoms. A fucking whore and a fucking submissive bitch, that’s why you are with her”
Ana - “guys please stop”
Me - “Don’t you fucking dare talk about Ana that way, be fucking respectful”
Betty - “A fucking whore is what she is, and submissive, and worthless”
At that point we are yelling at each other and Betty starts saying that I am assaulting her, and threatens to call the cops. She grabs her phone to make a call and I start filming with mine, making it very clear that at no point have I put my hands on her or planning to, at all. She starts yelling at me for recording her and bring up her lawyers and the cops, and how recording her without her consent is illegal. We are calling each other names and I continue to film. She is also in disbelief at how my girlfriend is “not defending HER”. In reality Ana was trying to stay out of it.
Needless to say, the way back to their apartment with the couch was extremely uncomfortable. It was very quiet for the first 20 minutes until Ana asked us why we can’t just get along, which made Betty go off again, yelling at how I am slick, worthless, and so many names I cannot remember. Betty said she does not want me to step foot in HER house, and continued to say she would break the lease and have my girlfriend’s stuff out of her place. When we got to the apartment I let them carry the couch inside and asked my girlfriend to bring my stuff (a backpack and a duffle bag) out of the apartment. I did not want to step foot inside for my own safety. Betty does not have a gun but I am sure she would have used it if she did, either to threaten or God knows what. As I was leaning on the frame of the door Betty asked if I would come in, to which I said no, and she also slammed the door on my face and prevented Ana from opening it, positioning herself in front of the door and yelling that “if she steps foot outside she would kick her out” to which I kept yelling that Ana is also in the lease. When Betty opened the door I told her I would call the cops if she tried one more time to hold Ana hostage inside. She went off again and threatened to lawyer up and kick Ana out. After much yelling and cries from Betty, I ended up stepping inside, closing the door behind me, and talking to them both to de-escalate the situation.
At this point it is 2AM and after much yelling I apologize to my girlfriend’s roommate for stepping over the line when I basically called her a whore. I was a total piece of shit in that regard and sincerely felt like apologizing. Betty did not apologize but she said I could stay over. She said she will forget about the whole situation and that all she needed was to cry and get over what I had said. She went to the balcony to smoke weed and I left the apartment to basically cry out of frustration. Ana followed me and after 30 minutes or so talking outside I told her I had to leave. I did not feel safe sleeping over and did not know if I could ever feel safe again in that space. I walked over to my car and drove home for an hour. I went to bed at 3:30AM and woke up at 6:50AM, took a shower, and headed back to my girlfriend’s apartment complex to return the truck which we had to do by 9AM.
Sunday: flat tire and location sharing
It’s now Sunday morning. I get to my girlfriend’s apartment at 8:15AM, where I leave my car parked, and with her on the passenger seat drive over to the UHAUL, which is about 20 minutes away, to return the truck. Everything is done on time and after getting my girlfriend’s car from the UHAUL parking lot we stop at a diner to have breakfast. We get back to her apartment at around 10:20AM and by 10:25AM we are driving over to my place, each of us in separate cars. About 10 minutes after leaving I get a flat tire notification on my car’s dashboard and pull over at a near gas station to see what was going on. The car had gone from 35PSI in one of the rear tires all the way to 15, and kept going down. I end up driving the car over to a TiresPlus close by, which later confirmed the flat tire was due to a hole on the outside which “had been caused by an object that went in and out, more than likely a screwdriver or a knife”. Needless to say I had to pay ~$200 for a new tire.
I told Ana there is no way this was coincidence and that I suspected Betty had done something to that tire. She said she did not think it could have been the case since there is no way Betty knew where I parked. I did not think that logic made sense since Betty knows exactly what car I drive and she was in the apartment, in her room, when Ana and I left earlier to return the truck. She basically had two hours to do anything. On top of that, I found out that Ana actively shares her location with Betty via iMessage, and vice versa. Ana and I also have that sort of arrangement. They have been doing it for years.
Ana and I spent the Sunday sleeping at my apartment pretty much. I could not get the situation out of my head and barely slept, but being together made me feel better. We talked about the future extensively and Ana promised me that she will cut all communication with Betty once the lease is over, but currently there is nothing she can do. She also brought up living together again, and the following day also told me how she was looking into jobs that are close to my place.
Monday: going on a break with Ana
Ana went to work on Monday morning (5AM) from my house and I worked from home. I did not get anything done thinking about the whole situation and later in the afternoon Ana and I continued to talk about it. Later at night, as Ana was sending me text messages on how she was cleaning the house, Betty was also posting on social media about it. I told the whole story to my best friend who seemed mortified about the situation and asked me to be careful. Monday night I sent Ana a long message explaining that I need some time to think about our relationship. I said that I could not trust her judgement and was afraid for what might happen if she still hangs with this crazy person not now, but in the future as we think of a life together. Will she be at our wedding? At her birthday parties? Will she be involved in our lives? Even though she has told me she will not, I know that Ana has been well aware of how Betty is but nothing has changed in their friendship these past 17 years. It has only become stronger.
Ana was very hurt from my message and called me right away. After a one hour conversation where she pushed me to decide on breaking up or continue the relationship she hung up when I told her to please give me until Friday. She does not understand how it is that I am re-thinking our relationship if it is that I love her. I do care so much about her, but have not been able to move past what happened and the fear that she might introduce me to similarly dangerous people or environments, be it with Betty or with someone else, is severely impacting my ability to think there is a future here. To keep the story short this is the third time Ana has tried to, or has introduced me to, people or situations that pose a danger to me and her. I also have not been able to get out of my head how it is that she is friends with this person, Betty, who is so visibly crazy and with whom she has a matching tattoo, years of friendship, experiences, etc.
Tuesday: Ana’s early morning call and social media login attempt
At 7:30AM of Tuesday, as I was getting ready for work, Ana called me to tell me she was sorry for blocking me on social media and on iMessage. By doing that I no longer have access to her location. I was not aware since she had done that at night, after I had asked for some time. She told me she “did not want me to think the posts from her story were directed toward me”. She also told me that “she wanted to have some sort of control seeing how I was having her wait for a decision and felt lost”. She also confessed she could not sleep and had gotten to work very early, thinking through everything in her car at her workplace parking lot. Ana begged me to please consider our relationship and after trying on the phone we hung up for the day, and have not talked since.
After hanging out with Ana I noticed I also had an unread message of a login attempt into my Instagram. That was never happened before and my mind instantly went to Betty. At this point I might be overthinking, however, after such an awful experience.
I am in a situation where I have to decide whether to have Ana move in with me, live with the fact that she is with a psycho for the next ten months, or simply leave it all behind despite how much I care about her. I don’t know if I am ignoring some red flags and that’s really the reason why I needed the time and am seeking some help on here. I don’t know if I am in the wrong and would like some clarification because I truly feel so lost. Ana has done so much for me in the sense that she listens and I know she loves me, but I am just afraid of her judgement and what she might bring into the relationship in the future. I also feel like I don’t know her like I thought.
Should I lie the relationship or continue to fight? Would sincerely, wholeheartedly appreciate some advice.

I finished reading the comic for the first time over the weekend, and though I have many many thoughts, one sticks out at the moment about the Comedian. I can't get my head around him. He was his own worst enemy all throughout his life, he burnt so many bridges that he had nobody to turn to when he needed it most and it cost him his life.
But one of the things about him that most interests me is his reaction to finding out Ozy's plan. The only one who could have helped and didn't outright despise him was Rorschach, yet the Comedian didn't go to him, but an old enemy, drunk out of his mind and in pieces. It seemed that in spite of all the awful things he had done in his life, all the excuses and blame-shifting he did to keep living the way he did, none of it could protect him from what he learned.
Maybe it was the breaking point. He was old and alone. His daughter (rightfully) despised him, he had no friends or allies left, and though he cast people aside and was determined to forge his own path through an insane world, he cared enough to patch things up with the original Silver Spectre and connect with his daughter. When her mother dragged her away from him and left him behind, she admitted he looked sad.
Maybe Ozy's plan finally shattered the bluster and bullshit, revealing a man who knows, deep down, how much of a mess of his life he has made, and how badly he wanted a connection to hold onto, and Ozymandias's plan finally buried any chance or hope he had of that.
He had burned too many bridges. His former colleagues were either too old, dead or insane, the government he had been a stooge for all these years would never buy it. As I said, Rorschach was the only one who didn't hate him - hell, he respected the Comedian - yet perhaps, after living so long without taking responsibility for his own life, shifting it to higher powers or animal instincts, and being an old man now himself, the Comedian no longer had the will to even try to stop it. Maybe he felt as helpless as Dr Manhattan, despite being just as capable to act if he chose.
I don't know, just my thoughts. He's an interesting, sad case. Heck, all of them are sad in some way really.

Hi, it's my first time using Reddit. And English is not my first language. Sorry for any mistakes. Sorry if it's too long. So my sister 27 and I 20f looks quite similar.. people often calls us twins.. but we're NOT. We have the same height, weight, face ... Literally. I don't know how my parents use the same formula for me which they made my sister 7 years back.. but we're really different.. she's good at studies, sports and everything.. which I'm not . I was a good student with straight A's till grade 7. Everything just changed since then. I was assaulted by by uncle. I never mentioned anything to anybody about it till one of the teachers noticed and kept asking me , so I told her and asked her not to tell anyone else cux it would cause problems within the family and I did not wanted to be the reason my family falls apart. Guess what the next day I went to school and everybody was giving me the look, like I'm just something disgusting. She went and told everyone.. and yet none of my family knew about it. I live under the same roof as my parents and they never noticed anything nor ask me if anything was wrong, I haven't ate for days, stopped going out, failing from all subjects. After I failed my exams my mom kept telling me how my sister was always good at studies and never made them disappointed, and I should be like her . From it's always been like how I should do as good as her. After a year to that incident my mom got to know about it and the first thing she said was " why did you have to go there? " Like really? Not even asking how I was feeling, or even if I'm okay. Fuck. And my sister, she'll wear the clothes and jewelleries that I get for my birthday from my aunt, and tell me I should share . But does it go the other way round? No. Why? because it's hers.. you're such a btch . Whenever I would go out with my friends (3girls) you would go to mom complaining that I'm going around the whole city for look for boys. Like how many times did I cover up for you and your bfs. How pathetic are you , going and telling people that I've got eye surgery to look different from you cuz I hate you! Yeah I do hate you . I've never got my eyes done and you know damn well. For context, I have small Asian eyes. We're Asians but people here do not have small eyes. I was born with these eyes. The biggest difference between you and me. When I was younger they always have said that I was adopted and I used to believe by how they treated me. But the more I grew I started to look exactly like you. I hate myself that I look like you.. I fcking hate myself for it. And mom, if you never wanted me , then did you gave birth , why not just kill me before I was born ? Why not abandon me ? Why not put me for adoption? Why .. could have just swallowed. I still remember the day you told me that I was the biggest mistake you've ever made .. it fcking hurts. It still feels like you just now said that to me.. it hurts that I have to come home early from report giving day , not because I failed just because how I see my friends parents talking with teachers, taking pictures and having a great time. I come home fcking crying with A's and still feel like a failure. Now that I want to move out you ain't event gonna let me do that either. Whenever I'm applying for a job it's not any job that you approve. It's suffocating to live with you people. I hate this . I hate everything.. idk. I don't want be around you people. I just want out. If not by getting job then I'll k!ll myself. At least I won't have to suffer everyday by living with you. I fcking hate it

Just wondering if there's anyone out there who could spare some money for food my way. Currently have nothing but trail mix and homemade bread that I messed up- so its just a hard and chewy monstrosity. That and tap water I'm running through my little pitcher. But I feel like I'd rather just munch on these peanut snacks I had hidden away, not gonna lie they're stale as fuck but better than more chewy and insanely hard dough and water.
Doordash gives me all of these 50-60% off coupons now when I have absolutely no money. Well, I have $5.59 in my bank account but that's it. If anyone comes by this and would be able to spare anything, I just want a warm meal man. I feel so shitty that I'm in this position but I just don't have a car, don't have a job currently, mental health not doing so hot, just falling apart. Anyways, this was really more so to vent.
If there's anyone put there that reads this, thank you whether you can spare anything or not.

I used to be a big leftie from being a young person (age 15 in 2013) to around 2020. I was one of the people purged during Destinys infamous 'Leftie Ark'. I consumed a lot of tyt, Kylie kulinsky (especially as a kid), and post Destiny purge, a ton Chao trap house and great friend of the steam, Hasan. It's crazy hearing Cenk talk again today, as the narrative has not changed at all in at least a decade.
The narrative I'm talking about is the broad acceptance that democrats do not care about you, they give concessions because they actually agree with Republicans, they are completely owned and controlled by corporations, and they rig elections against left wing candidates (aka Bernie and friends)
(Also I'm Australian but I used to exclusively consume US politics lol)
I was fully bought into this narrative until the start of the 2020 election. If anyone remembers the democratic primary in Iowa, Bernie won the first vote, then Pete Buttigieg won the second vote by a very slim margin. I was watching Sam Seders coverage, and the take away was that it was unfortunate for Bernie, he didn't have the best political strategy, well done to Pete, and good luck for the rest of the primary even if it didn't look too optimistic for Bernie going forward.
When he ended stream I turned over to Hasan's channel, who was still streaming. The man was literally living in a different universe. He was just screaming to thousands of people that the DNC were rigging it again, that Pete was a rat fuck CIA plant, that we needed to fight for Bernie, and mostly more about how rigged it was.
It was jarring and honestly scary, that two political commentators could have entirely different world views, one based on trust in our systems and processes, and another based on sowing distrust and anger, peddling and simply fabricating conspiracy theories with no shame or apparent self awareness.
What's the point of all this? Progressive new media is black pilled on the democratic party, every good thing they do is tainted by the concessions they make to do it. If I'm watching a game of Aussie rules football, it doesn't matter how many goals the other team kicks if my team is winning in the end. It seems like Cenk and co are less concerned with their team winning, and more concerned with the other team not scoring.
IRI was great to listen to after stream last night, he outlined exactly how masterfully the democrats played the Republicans into thinking they were getting a great deal while robbing them blind, and how some Republicans were even out there bragging about negotiating and compromising with Joe Biden (as though that isn't a massive W for his political strategy)
Cenk and co are missing the forest for the trees, since the 2020 election Democrats have not dropped a single game, they're having a perfect season. Legislatively with the infrastructure bill and the safer communities act, to political wins like holding the senate and doing way better in the house than they should have, and now getting the debt ceiling increased while giving fuck all up for it, taking away the Republicans only real bargaining chip for another 2 years.
The biggest win Republicans have had this presidency was the supreme Court overruling of Roe v Wade, which democrats (and Republicans) had 0 control over and which has been fucking disastrous for Republicans electability, and there is nothing positive on the horizon for Republicans either. Right wing media is in shambles both new and old, right when we are about to enter a bloodbath between Trump and Desantis (with Chris Christie apparently coming to Stoke the flames) and on top of that the only fucking topic that Republicans care about is trans people, that's literally it. You can try to run a presidential election on hating 0.1% of the population, is just not going to fucking work. Regular people, who decide elections, simply don't give a shit.
Tldr: big rant with no sources, Cenk and co are too black pilled on the democratic party to see that the Dems have beaten the Republicans at every turn this administration.

Ok so Ive been thinking about this. No matter who im with or what the mood or relationship, ive realized taking off my shirt/bra for sex makes me feel whorish. I have large breasts so when I'm topless I'M TOPLESS. Especially because my top is usually the first to go. The thing is im damn near naked at home all the time. I walk around my place in underwear or shorts and thats it. I am always naked and when I'm alone my breasts are just breast the same way a leg is just a leg. I dont date or have sex often once or twice a year at most so this isn't a current issue just something i been thinking about. Any insights?

Writing a 40k fiction & here is my shot at creating a warp god who's main demographic is Underdogs (and there's alot of them in 40k) and isn't necessarily "Good", just not Chaos aligned. However much of it's power does come from negativity (naturally)
Gwythion
Found in: Boundaries, Angst, endurance & Understanding
Words: "Here I am!" "Give what is given!"
He is the the force that resists, the unyielding, the King of weakness, the hand that opens the door and ushers you into the beyond. His Child is the underdog, the impotent, any who have been thrown away for being lesser, he claims their souls to gain strength and give it back in turn. All who are lesser, wishing for strength & thrashing pathetically against those stronger and greater are most likely to draw his attention. He is opposition itself, the strength to endure, regardless of suffering. When we feel that we are beyond our limits and find new strength, we find his embrace. Wherever there are forces moving in the universe, he is there, always pushing back in equal challenge
His greatest known enemies are Khorne & Slaanesh.
Blood for the blood god and skulls for the skull throne! Khorne loves battle and he feels the loss of every potential warrior joining another host, afterall angst is a combination of anger and sorrow. Although the thirst for vengeanc is a wonderful feeling, the thought of any warrior fighting solely to end the fight and make peace later o fills him with anger indeed.
Pain and Pleasure! Slaanesh is hunger and excess incarnate, including excessive cruelty and sadism. Whenever Slaanesh hears one of her billions of souls, adults, elderly, even children, suffering under the most unspeakable acts & calling out for help, for the torture to stop, for mercy, to just end it all, she is filled with immense pleasure & amusement. But whenever the weak & wretched hear the king's call to become strong enough to build themselves up and stop their own suffering, her hunger twists into obsessive fury.
Grandfather Nurgle! The bringer of plagues and pestilence. He is life unchecked, a crowned growth, Nurgle spreads misery and then promises release. Whenever those who are infected pray to Gwyth, their souls find strength to endure and Nurgle's touch is held at bay. With every infection halted, with every person that prays for strength to endure instead of sweet release, Nurgle grows sadder and sadder, only wishing to spread the filth he made just for you.
Tzeentch, the changer of ways! Thinks it's absolutely hilarious that another warp entity had existed right under their noses without being noticed for tens of thousands of years. Tzeentch wants to see how this plays out, not just a new player to the game, but one intelligent and prudent enough to slowly siphon power from khorne and slaanesh without either of them knowing and staying away from the limelight. Gwythion's overlapping influence with Khorne and Slaanesh will surely bring endless amusement. This new patron of mankind is no fool, but doesn't hold a candle the the one and only Tzeentch.
The God Emperor of mankind, a bulwark of humanity. With every psyker killed in a black ship like livestock, with every person sentenced to be a servitor, who has the flesh of their genitals and face removed without anesthesia, with every human soul crushed underneath the wheel of the Imperium. He feels them, hears them, and is quite aware of their innocence and their continued suffering but he does not listen not unless they serve. To know that another so called "God" seeks to manipulate humanity once again, fills the Emperor of man with one and only one desire, to destroy the King of weakness. How dare this "Gwythion" promise strength and freedom to those wretches who's minds bodies and souls could better be put to use, serving.

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Me (F20) and my boyfriend (M25) have been together for little bit over a year. We are eachother’s first loves and the way this man makes me feel (how safe and loved and understood) is out of this world. I know most redditors say “he’s so amazing but” and list many reasons why their partner is in fact not “so amazing” but I do think he is a phenomenal person. Anyhow. Sometimes I feel like I want him more than he wants me, that i’m a burden as he’d rather spend time doing something else instead of me (hah).
We spend 2-3 days a week together and i initiate most of it, he doesn’t really take me on dates or plans things and that wouldn’t really bother me as i am not much of a dates/events person but I do want to feel like a priority, like I matter, like I’m not an afterthought. He doesn’t like texting (however at the beginning we texted non stop) and it’s very common for him to not respond for almost the entire day. We’ve talked about this before and now he calls me everyday (unless he forgets because he’s a pretty disorganized person, we also assume he has ADHD) on his way to work, so that I feel wanted and he doesn’t feel pressured to text as much. He doesn’t live in my city and I don’t have a license yet so he has to pick me up whenever we hang out at his place or go somewhere (he claims this doesn’t bother him at all and he actually enjoys him and I had decided to trust him on that) so it’s impossible for me to drive up to him by myself (but I have proposed I take a bus to get to him if that’s what it takes to see him and he declined) just to spend and hour together, however, I need more. I need for him to want to hang out with me without me having to ask, I’d love to be with him whenever I have the time, he’s not like that. For example: tomorrow I start work at 4 pm, he at 5pm and it would never cross his mind to ask me to hang out till then, he’d rather spend it alone/with his roomate/playing video games or whatever else. I understand he needs alone time (so do I, as I have many side hobbies) but the day after that is similar and then again: he won’t ask to hang out and if i offer he’ll probably say he can’t as he’s busy. He won’t look at my texts until he feels like it, making me feel extremely neglected. Rarely are the days we spend together full days with a sleepover, they’re maybe a few hours here and there if i’m lucky. He very rarely sees a chunk of free time and thinks of me, he doesn’t really look at our work schedules and sees which days both of us are free. He wants me to move in with him as that way we’ll be able to spend more time together but that’s not an option for me yet.
I have many mental health issues and am going to therapy (so working on it) so consequentially I (a lot of the time) can’t really differentiate between my problems with him being a reflection of my poor mental health and many issues or are they actually valid.
I have asked him before if he could take more time for me and plan things, he is making progress but I fear it’s not enough. He said he’s now afraid to tell me that he wants to spend time alone because then I’ll feel like he’s not attentive enough, even though that’s not true at all. I want him to have free time and time with friends, all I wish is for him to squeeze me in between that and not for me to feel like I’m forcing my own boyfriend to spend time with me. I am now at a point where I’m borderline afraid to even propose any time together because I cannot escape the feeling that he only does it to please me (he says that’s not true).
When we’re together his attention is all mine, he’s attentive and caring, touchy and complementary, we laugh and we cry together, he is an amazing listener and knows how to calm me down. When we’ve traveled together we had a great time, we work amazingly as a team, have fun etc. I feel no doubts when I’m actually with him in person but if I don’t see him for an extended period of time (let’s say a week) I start to doubt his feelings and care for me. He doesn’t respond to my texts for a whole day (and I send him maybe one two to texts, sometimes a meme, I wouldn’t say I’m overbearing at all), forgets to call, doesn’t look at his timetable and mine to plan something, he just goes living his life as if I didn’t exist. Sometimes I fear that if I don’t ask to see him, we won’t hang out for a month before he remembers he has a girlfriend.
Am I expecting too much of him or is he giving me too little?