How much is critical role worth

i just got my finaid package. the school offered me about 37k worth in merit scholarship and institutional grants, but i cannot possibly afford the rest and i really want to avoid taking out loans as much as possible. my efc was 0, but because my noncustodial had an anomaly year where he made much more than usual, i think i didn’t get as much aid as i should have. does anyone have tips on how to appeal for more aid?

Hello, I’m not sure if this is the right place or not. I currently owe $6,477 left on my car at 11% interest. I made a really bad mistake a few years ago of getting into a really high interest loan (like 28% but then switched lenders which ended up being a mistake as well because yes it lowered my interested rate, it added $2,000 back to my balance) at the time. I have beaten myself up so much about this in the past because I truly didn’t know. (Sounds ignorant) I owe more than what’s left on the car, again the car wasn’t worth it. Lol and I know now the trusty car companies to trust. I do have money in my savings and wondering if it’s worth just paying the car off? The car is almost at 160,000 miles and I feel like it doesn’t have much left to be honest…. Either way I feel helpless. Money makes me nervous.

Hello fella 🟡🧥🐝
So. I’m super late to the show, just found it this weekend and of course binged and finished last night (Sunday). I haven’t had a ton of time to think through everything or do a re-watch obviously, so please go easy on me. I also haven’t gotten a chance to read through too many posts on this sub but I’ve been scrolling through some of the ‘hot’ posts and ‘best’ of the last year etc etc.
To preface everything - I absolutely loved it. Amazing show amazing cast, great all around pretty much. I did want to see if anyone potentially feels the same as me about one particular thing, so here it goes...My first thought / reaction / burning itch with the show, is with the whole mystical darkness and the evil(?) forces/figures/shadows/energy that may or may not be out there that the girls are slowly admitting to believe in and engage with. And to be honest my biggest problem with yhis is that I feel like the show didn’t need that extra layer of ‘substance’ in the storyline or overall plot and direction. It would have been just as amazing and absolutely phenomenal of a show without any supernatural/mystical dark evil themes added to it. Like, you have two timelines, one of national champions girls soccer team - highly motivated, capable, smart and competitive aloha-type badass young ladies going through a plane crash in the wilderness, and getting stuck there on their own for 19 months having to freaking survive Mother Nature and all its glory and wrath which anyone would know even without watching a single episode of it that that alone is enough material and substance to create create fascinating and extremely intense storylines, showing the audience how who why and what happens out there there over the course of that year and the survival drama that unfolds, AND THEN - on top of that you have the current timeline showing us 20+ years later how those women’s lives turned out and what kind of shenanigans comes with the territory of being stranded on your own and having to fight to survive the challenges of nature, aka the impact that time had and continues to have on all of them, seperatly and/or together. Mental and physical impact, social and emotional impact, just their whole life trajectory would be altered of course due to this kind of event they all were a part of.
So you have those two timelines to explore - so much content and natural themes to explore - I honestly really don’t know or understand why they had to add this extra concept of supernatural and demons/dark/cult stuff. Like I’m not talking about the whole cannibalism ritual - I think that’s one of the elements to explore the decline of their humanity into pure savage mode under extreme survival-of-the-fittest conditions, and how their group split into hunters and prey - and how they developed some sort of ritual to make it acceptable or at least lie to themselves (or cover the horrors of their actions, sort of like a self denial mechanism or mentally-coping strategy ) that what they’re doing is the moral choice and by doing all those ritual’y things and following a certain process and doing some sort of earthly connection kumbaya every time they preyed on and cooked one their fella friends to be eaten...but all of that that doesn’t have to include some sort of cult-oriented belief that they’re letting some darkness / dark forces “guide their spirits” and start believing in whatever lottie is pulling them towards. Like it could have been really cool just to watch the humanity slowly fade away as hunger takes over, without the addition of the evil spirits and writing lottie’s character to have some prophet-like tendencies ans visions that influence the other girls to start believing this stuff. It’s also clear that the show is making it more than just her schizophrenia and being off pills that are causing al this stuff, they’re pushing it in the direction of actual dark magic and future-seeing, not just a mental illness with no pills left - if that was even the case to begin with which it might never have been about the schizophrenia and her diagnosis was bogus to start with which means she’s just had “powers” the whole time.
Anyways I have a few more thoughts regarding this issue and I am not sure I even explained this one above that well - lots of rambling because I’m still trying to mold my words and thoughts into something that will initiate further discussion about it - but I wanted to start hearing people’s thoughts about it even without my post being perfectly laid out.
I’m not trying to start any angry back-and-forth, just friendly debate or friendly argument even; and again a reminder I am still new to the show and the sub, only finished it last night and have had half a day to browse through posts and threads and haven’t seen much about this topic, but if there is anything - happy to re-direct my post there.

Hi there, I'm working in cyber security and thought about moving around a bit. Got a cat so I would prefer to stay in one place for 6 months up to a year to not stress her out too much. I'm an EU citizen and currenlty in Poland, what do I do with taxes? I initially moved from one EU country to Poland, had to change my address in the embassy so the other country knows I'm in Poland. Now that I want to move more, how do I do that with "country of residence"? I have no idea about the whole freelance thing because most of what I find is for people doing freelance in one country in the EU or straight stuff for US folks. I switched jobs but I've been always "just" fulltime employed. Should I consult a lawyeaccountant or does anyone has some insight here?
PS: I really need to keep a clean vest due to some personal reasons.

I am moving states soon due to my partner changing jobs and am looking for advice on how to initiate a lateral move with minimal pay rate disruption to another state DOT below the PE level with more than 4 years experience (the stress of moving my partner in and a busy personal life have not been conducive to studying). Would you send an email or call the HR office to ask about lateral opportunities (as they are only advertising their entry level and PE roles on the career hub)? Or just apply and wait to bring it up later?
I am able to step from one job to another without needing any onboarding due to both states running Bentley products and frankly excellent delivery on my quite high profile and challenging projects, but am struggling with how to currently phrase that without appearing too conceited/overconfident (DOT jobs and schedules are pretty trivial once you know what you're doing). I'm also seeking advice on how to approach that when applying/interviewing.
For the interview process, is it legal for me to bring cover sheets on projects that I have led design for?

As the title suggests, my dad has been or at least is in the process of being scammed. Now, just for clarification, he is by no means stupid. He is great with money, he made many successful investments and was able to provide us (a family with 4 children) a comfortable life, with annual vacations, two cars and so on. However, it seems like he made a mistake just now.
He signed up into a website (that was promoted by loads and said to be legit) in which he gets a broker, who looks at the prices of different currencies, buys them and the moment the price goes up on one of them he sells. Or at least that's how my dad explained it. Well a few days ago this "broker" told my father that there is some Russian currency that supposedly can be bough cheap and sold in the UK for much more. My father pumped two thousand Euros into this website, which for us is a pretty good amount of money. It was a bit fishy for me, but the investment was made and I could only hope. After all, the website seemed legit. Well, the little counter counting the current balance of one's account went up to ten thousand Euros, which was almost like a dream come true for us. It could pay off debt, go into a car my dad invested in, pay off vacation my parents planned on so long and so on. It was great news, we got excited and all, and my dad was going to surprise m mom with the news when she gets back from a business trip, but after all it looks like it's not gonna happen.
These people had the AUDACITY to not only take all that money and probably do nothing with it, but when my dad tried to withdraw the money from the website, they told him that he has to pay the British government in order to do it, which will cost him another 1430 Euros. He told them to just pay it from the money he placed into the website, but they obviously said they cannot do that. Can anyone help me? I have no idea what to do, but I cannot sit around, doing nothing. My dad was so happy to receive this amount of money when he told me over Messenger and it's just sad to see that excitement go. I want to do something about all of this, but I no close to nothing about what's legal and what I can do, so I would appreciate any advice/help.

Warning: I accidentally wrote an essay 😅
So now that we have Kaveh's birthday reveal, it turns out his birthday is July 9, and he's a Cancer :)
A lot of people were expecting him to be a Leo because of his keychain (which I guess we now know is just a cute Kshahrewar reference) and him having a lot of Leo qualities. But I can definitely see how Kaveh fits Cancer better. Because (a) Leo was such a popular guess, (b) I'm a Leo, and (c) I have Kaveh brainrot, in this post I'll be comparing the two signs, which have plenty of overlap but certain key differences that I think push Kaveh more towards Cancer than Leo. And feel free to use this thread to share any other astrology insights, or compare him to a different sign!
Btw I don't seriously put stock in astrology, but I still like to indulge in humoring the idea when it does happen to fit people's personalities. So while this analysis ended up being more detailed than I expected, it's just for fun! If you think astrology is stupid, look away. Anyway.
Analysis
Although there is a lot of overlap between these two emotional signs, Kaveh being a Cancer must mean certain parts of his personality are more defining aspects to his character than others, such as being hyper emotional and sensitive, intensely loving and devoted to the people he cares about, and moody (he's had mood swings in like every appearance so far lol). Both signs can be kind, caring, empathetic, generous, and loyal, but Kaveh probably values things like "heart/love" and "home/loved ones" more extremely. Considering he is an architect, had a joint project that resulted in being gifted a house, and an important part of his character is being Alhaitham's roommate (whether you like that about him or not), the theme of "home" shines through here. Even the Palace of Alcazarzaray is not just a building but Dori's home. Additionally, water signs are also usually more associated with creativity, so this matches the emphasis on his artistry.
Both signs are generous, but Cancers are supposed to be even more altruistic and selfless, ready and willing to put their needs second. Cancers are also very protective, which we can see with Kaveh worrying over Alhaitham and the Traveler after the former's SQ, asking if they're ok as well as masking some of his concern by nagging about the books when he said Alhaitham should have stayed at home. I think it's safe to interpret the statement as being protective in a way, since he basically said "if only Alhaitham stayed at home (with me), then he would have stayed out of (been protected from) trouble!" I think this caring and protective nature also manifests in the importance he places on social welfare and taking care of other people in need, even at his own expense.
Kaveh is also more secretive about things, which is a Cancer and not Leo trait. This stems from being more uncertain and insecure plus sensitive to criticism (also major Cancer traits). His drip marketing says he is "deathly afraid" his secrets will get out. Leos' egos can be wounded but they usually have enough self-assurance to restore it themselves, while Cancers are more fragile to other people's opinions. Kaveh recognizes his own positive qualities, but is still easily provoked by Alhaitham's jabs and will ruminate on any anxieties. Leos also tend to have a more dominating personality, but I don't see that in Kaveh. He's just noisy but not dominating.
Again both signs are naturally giving and will be among the first to assist you, but they ask for help differently. A huge way Kaveh doesn't fit being a Leo is that he shamelessly asks Alhaitham to pay for his drinks even when he still owes rent. It's a lot harder to convince a Leo to ask for and accept help; relying on others will rarely be a Leo's first or even second option, even if you're close with them. But when a Cancer has a close bond with someone, then they will freely ask for help and can even become dependent on people if they're not careful. Kaveh might be embarrassed about being broke, but he seems to have no qualms with being spoiled by Alhaitham.
Both signs need attention from their loved ones, but a neglected Leo would sulk and suffeendure in silence. Whereas Kaveh is more clingy and demanding of attention when he doesn't receive it. Cancers may be softhearted but can also be more spiteful and vindictive (Kaveh readily calling out Alhaitham's negative qualities and phrasing it in a toxic way; Kaveh refusing his share of the house after their fallout). But the softheartedness will still shine through in the end, as long as they still care about you (again, Kaveh worrying over Alhaitham immediately after having just put him on blast).
Work-wise, Leos bask and thrive in the spotlight of their success. Even though they care about others, they can still end up being a little self-absorbed. I'm sure everyone enjoys a certain level of validation, but Leos are supposedly better equipped to being the center of attention and admiration. We can assume that Kaveh feels some conflict over being so renowned and idolized. For one, that reputation and the accompanying expectations makes the burden of his secret bankruptcy even heavier. And two, Kaveh said so himself that he doesn't like the Akademiya pressuring people by labeling them as geniuses. And Alhaitham's introduction for him in the drip marketing repeats how Kaveh thinks reputation and talent can be a burden. We see this sentiment reinforced twice, so I think it's safe to infer Kaveh wrestles with these feelings himself.
Kaveh has fame and titles, but we're told in his drip marketing that it's just a byproduct of his work, which means it's not as important to him to be renowned for it. He has pride in his work because he pours his heart into it, not because he's driven by a desire to build his reputation or garner widespread admiration. Not saying Leos necessarily want fame, but a stereotypical Leo quality is being able to feed off recognition and attention, not feel repelled by it.
When it comes to work ethic, Cancers are very diligent and devoted to their work, especially if they gain self-satisfaction from it. Leos can work hard when they have a goal in mind but are also prone to laziness, while Cancers have a more consistent and dependable work ethic. I think Leos have less consistency unless they are fueled by a certain ambition. Kaveh's dedication to working hard seems more stable.
Kaveh may be a Cancer, but he still has some overlap with Leos and probably other signs too. After all, this isn't Astrology Impact, so he has a more complex personality that won't perfectly match every element of his sign. But again, I can see how Cancer might be the best fit if you had to choose one, depending on which parts of his personality are meant to be more central to his character. After all, Childe is another Cancer with a pretty different personality, but some of the most defining parts of his personality align with his sign: his devotion to his family, hardcore loyalty to the Tsaritsa, the secrets he needed to guard in Liyue AQ and from Teucer, being a reliable and diligent worker, and him being one of the kinder Harbingers to his subordinates.
Of course, we can't be sure of how much Hoyo considered Kaveh's sign when deciding on his birthday/personality. And also astrology certainly doesn't define and limit people's personalities, especially in real life. But since Kaveh is just a fictional character, him being meant have some compatibility with his sign isn't farfetched, especially because astrology in Teyvat is real, in its own way.

Hi all,
I can't understand which forms I need to file and how, and I can't afford a tax professional to help me so I'm hoping I can find some advice here. This is my situation:
-I am a US citizen but I lived in Europe for a few years
-The first half of last year I worked for an American NGO in Spain as a freelancer (or contractor? I don't know the difference between the two. Basically I was paid per hour, not on a contract as an employee, but I worked exclusively for that organization). I paid freelance taxes and fees to Spain for the money I earned during that period. It wasn't very much - approximately $2k a month.
-During the summer I moved back to the US and that same NGO switched me from freelancer to an employee on a contract, although I was still working only part time for the same amount.
-In the fall, I was let go from that job and a couple weeks before the end of the year, I was hired again as a freelancer paid per hour for another organization.
Since my year has been a bit of an international freelance/employee mish mash, I don't know what exactly I'm supposed to do and what the process is. My questions specifically:

1. What forms do I need to file?
2. How do I file them? Is there a tax platform that I should use like Tax Act or Turbo Tax? Or am I supposed to print and mail them? Or should someone be doing it for me?
3. Do I need a tax professional to help me? If so, where can I find an affordable one?
4. In this situation, am I likely to have to pay taxes or get a refund? (so that I know if I need to pull from savings if I'll need to pay)

I'm sorry if these are very simple or silly questions. Before this experience with the American company, I was working with Spanish companies so this process is new to me and stressful since I want to get it right. Any advice is welcome and appreciated!
Thank you in advance!

I am moving to Brooklyn and thinking about getting a Vespa/scooter (probly 150cc) to get around (mostly for fun) within the borough of Brooklyn. I might use it to commute to work in lower Manhattan but I would not rely on it. Is it worth it? Is it to much of hasel? Do they get stole?

My dream is to have a relationship so special that we can look back on it fondly in the years to come. I want to put in the work to make that dream come true, and now all I need to start is you. So take the chance with me?
About me then:
https://i.imgur.com/a4XgWZg.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/CUBYFhn.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/oULApJU.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/wKqGxQc.png

• I'm a relaxed, laidback and honest guy. I'm myself, through and through, and I'd rather deal with the truth than try to make a lie work.
  
• I love jokes, puns and teasing. And I hope that you give as good as you take.
  
• I'm very nerdy and much into things like Star Wars, Dungeons & Dragons, and PC games. I've done some dungeon mastering, and I'm slowly working on my campaign to run for my group. I even bought some 40k figures, but that's only for a small thing with my group.
  
• I'm a non-religious atheist, I love science, and politically, I lean towards whatever we can do to make a better world for everyone.
  
• I like making things and working on my projects. I have a combo 3D printelaser cutter & engraver and hope to expand with more tools. Sometimes I also work on making games.
  
• I work as a programmer in a small start-up business, and it's going very well.
  

And to avoid wasting time, here are a couple of things that might be dealbreakers:

• I'm overweight. Not massively so, but I could stand to work out.
  
• I'm primarily looking for someone in Denmark. You can be from another country, but know that I am not moving country, nor will I ever. On the flip side, I can move to just about anywhere in Denmark.
  
• Cigarettes are gross. I don't smoke it; please don't, either. I could help you stop, but you'd have to want to.
  
• I'd like kids of our own sometime in the future, but I am not open to anyone who already has kids. I want us to be able to spend time together without having that hanging over us.
  

If you're still here, send me a message (do not comment on the post! It gets deleted before I can see it.) Tell me something about yourself; hobbies, what you care about, how much you love coffee, just something to start a conversation. I prefer voice chat, but we can start with text chat. As long as you talk back, I can't run a conversation alone! Well, I am good at talking with myself, but I'm trying to get to know you after all!
I'd also greatly appreciate you sharing a picture of yourself!

My dream is to have a relationship so special that we can look back on it fondly in the years to come. I want to put in the work to make that dream come true, and now all I need to start is you. So take the chance with me?
About me then:
https://i.imgur.com/a4XgWZg.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/CUBYFhn.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/oULApJU.jpg
https://i.imgur.com/wKqGxQc.png

• I'm a relaxed, laidback and honest guy. I'm myself, through and through, and I'd rather deal with the truth than try to make a lie work.
  
• I love jokes, puns and teasing. And I hope that you give as good as you take.
  
• I'm very nerdy and much into things like Star Wars, Dungeons & Dragons, and PC games. I've done some dungeon mastering, and I'm slowly working on my campaign to run for my group. I even bought some 40k figures, but that's only for a small thing with my group.
  
• I'm a non-religious atheist, I love science, and politically, I lean towards whatever we can do to make a better world for everyone.
  
• I like making things and working on my projects. I have a combo 3D printelaser cutter & engraver and hope to expand with more tools. Sometimes I also work on making games.
  
• I work as a programmer in a small start-up business, and it's going very well.
  

And to avoid wasting time, here are a couple of things that might be dealbreakers:

• I'm overweight. Not massively so, but I could stand to work out.
  
• I'm primarily looking for someone in Denmark. You can be from another country, but know that I am not moving country, nor will I ever. On the flip side, I can move to just about anywhere in Denmark.
  
• Cigarettes are gross. I don't smoke it; please don't, either. I could help you stop, but you'd have to want to.
  
• I'd like kids of our own sometime in the future, but I am not open to anyone who already has kids. I want us to be able to spend time together without having that hanging over us.
  

If you're still here, send me a message (do not comment on the post! It gets deleted before I can see it.) Tell me something about yourself; hobbies, what you care about, how much you love coffee, just something to start a conversation. I prefer voice chat, but we can start with text chat. As long as you talk back, I can't run a conversation alone! Well, I am good at talking with myself, but I'm trying to get to know you after all!
I'd also greatly appreciate you sharing a picture of yourself!

​
Hop in and play whenever
https://discord.gg/gruntlifegaming
For over 3 years now I've been gaming with a good group of people with what we've built over at GruntLife Gaming (GLG). It's a Military Veteran Owned & Operated Discord but open to everyone with over 7000+ members. We have people that're military vets as well as regular civilians on multiple games and platforms but really has focused on Escape From Tarkov. We have a wide variety of different players from absolute newbies to very experienced players on EFT. So if you're new, there's people who're usually willing to help and if you're more experienced even better. We're also constantly not only running raids, we do in-game giveaways from time to time, and tournaments for people in the community among other things to help out and give back to our members. GruntLife Gaming's discord server is also Nitro Boosted to the highest level possible thanks to our great members. The server has the highest audio quality possible in discord, our very own Vanity URL, and much more! Just hop in, select our EFT role, and start playing! Hope to see ya around! \MUST BE 18+ YRS OLD TO JOIN*
Backup link: Backup link: https://discord.gg/UBeuutyXeG

Join us for tomorrow's webinar on Navigating the 2023 Economic Downturn with RMM!
Can't make it for the live version? Register anyway, and you'll get a copy of the webinar once it's over to view whenever you wish.
In this webinar, you'll learn about:

• How RMM provides continuous security assessments and services for customers
• How to monitor for anomalies across all customers at once
• Why RMM and EDR integration is critical
• Best practices for extending MSPs’ security stack

We look forward to seeing you there!

So is like a Holo 9 grade worth less or more then a non holo 10 and are cards grades linear with how much they increase mt payout?

Hi There,
Back again with a few new titles and a few price drops. Just vinyl this time but I'll probably have a haul of posters and books to add next week.
All music media is visually graded unless otherwise noted. I've had many positive interactions with folks in the sub and am also not hated over on Discogs. Shipping for anything that isn't a vinyl boxset is a flat $5 to CONUS no matter how much you order. Local pickup is available in the Cambridge/Somerville, MA area but requires a bit of arranging. If you're interested in anything, please contact me via chat (not messaging). My next mail run will be happening tomorrow (Tuesday, 03/21).
Btw, if you see something else in my Discogs shop that you would like to make an offer on, please feel free to contact me here.
Happy spring!
Beach House Teen Dream (Newbury, Purple) (M/NM) Factory-sealed copy of the Newbury Comics exclusive purple variant from 2016. Please note that this copy doesn't appear to be numbered. As is typically with numbered releases, some amount of overstock tends to be released after the numbered copies are exhausted. This will be one of those. $175
Beach House Thank Your Lucky Stars (Glitter) (M/NM) Factory-sealed copy. $100
Born of Osiris Angel or Alien (Neon Magenta and Neon Green) (NM/VG+) $37
Kate Bush Before The Dawn (4LP) (M/NM) Factory-sealed copy. Cheapest copy in the States on Discogs by a bit. $100
Cap'n Jazz Analphabetapolothology (Orange w/Cream Swirl) (NM/VG+) $47
High On Fire Death is This Communion (Gold Inside Clear w/Black) (VG+/VG+) $50
Lake Street Dive Bad Self Portraits (Clear with Red) (VG+/VG+) $75
Lush Origami (5LP, Mulit-color) (VG+/VG+) Vinyl is largely unplayed but a few of the platters have light paper scuffs from the sleeves. Happy to include give them a wash in the record doctor and include better inserts prior to shipping. Pricey but beautiful set. $270
Madlib Pinata Beats (Clear) (M/NM) Factory-sealed. $30
Modest Mouse This Is A Long Drive... (Silver & Aqua Blue Haze) (M/VG+) Factory-sealed copy. Knocking the sleeve down to VG+ due to the fact that the seal is very tight and jacket stock is somewhat thin resulting in some ringwear on the front cover along the opening. $70
Nirvana - Bleach (Newbury, Clear with Black Swirl) (M/NM) Factory-sealed copy. This one has the original hype sticker advertising a run of 1,500 copies (it was later re-stickered to advertise 1,400). It's worth noting that while the run of 1,400 ended up hand-numbered, some of the overage went out unnumbered. There isn't a number visible on the exterior of the jacket, so it should be assumed that this is un-numbered. $75
No Doubt Tragic Kingdom (Blue & White Marble) (VG+/VG+) Vinyl is very clean. Jacket stored in shrink. $65
Angel Olsen All Mirrors (7" Single) (M/NM) Factory-sealed copy. $10
Pixies Doolittle (Newbury, Splatter Bronze and Green on Clear) (VG+/VG+) Grading conservatively. Everything is closer to NM. $75
Queens of the Stone Age ...Like Clockwork (Newbury, Red) (VG+/VG+) Grading conservatively. Vinyl is very clean. Jacket stored in shrink. $50
Red House Painters Red House Painters (6LP) (M/VG+) LPs are factory-sealed. Outer cardboard box is in VG+ shape with just a little bit of shelfwear - particularly along the bottom edge. Super clean copy. #659. $190
Lou Reed The RCA & Arista Vinyl Collection Vol. 1 (M/NM) Factory-sealed copy with minimal shelfwear. Split in the shrinkwrap across the bottom but it's still sealed. $100
Run The Jewels Run The Jewels 4 (Clear w/Magenta Swirl) (M/NM) Factory-sealed copy. $28
VA - Soul Cal: Disco & Modern Soul Masterpieces 1971-1982 (M/VG+) Factory-sealed copy. Dropping the sleeve down to VG+ simply because the shrinkwrap is tight and causing light wear to corners and the early development of ringwear. $50

I am now just finding this subreddit years after, I had been diagnosed with GBS back in October of 2017. My diagnosis I think was a miracle, I was 22 had just been out of the Marines for 4-5 months twice a day gym goer incredibly fit. All of that changed when I was at work and my feet started to get numb, I didn’t think anything of it at the time I chocked it up to it’s cold and my boots are tight they will get feeling back when I get home. That night I took a hot shower and my feet were still numb. Once again I put it off to morning, I went into work that morning and not before long I realized my ankles, I could no longer completely feel from my ankles down. I asked to leave and go to urgent care. I drive myself to urgent care and wait around for a bit before getting seen. (This is where I believe someone was looking out for me) the doctor walks in listens to me for about 45 sec describe this to him and says “wait here I’ll be right back I need to give someone a call” me immoderately thinking the worse my feet are gonna be amputated I’ll have to learn how to walk with prosthetics. I was not ready for what he was about to say. The doctor returns and says “I gave my colleague a call, she’s a neurologists, what you are describing is very rare but if identified early on can save your life” he tells me it’s called guillain barre syndrome. Doesn’t really go into detail other then mentioning loss of motor function. He sends me to the main hospitals emergency room where they have me get a spinal tap and put me in a room and give me gabapentin. Waiting for the results while researching what it was . Finally the dr walks in and confirms that my spinal fluid proteins are reflecting the same elevated proteins in other gbs patients. At this point I turn to the dr and ask so when can I go home? Which he replied we are gonna have to keep you for a few days and monitor you to make sure it doesn’t get any worse. Over the next five days I can no longer do anything for myself. By day three I could no longer stand on my own two feet. No matter how hard I told my legs to move they couldn’t hear it. On that fifth day they told me I needed to be transferred to an acute rehab facility. It took about another week for me to start to be able to do the rehab. (I am extremely lucky, I’m not sure why or how, I had read that it takes people months to start to recover and here I am at two weeks attempting to cut my own food) at this same time I started to also develop Bell’s palsy in my face. Luckily that only lasted a few days, I spent the entire month of November fighting my own body to listen. I had dropped so much weight in such a short time, I entered to emergency room at around 215 by the end of November I had dropped all the way down to 155. My family brought me back to my apartment due to being 22 I was stubborn and did not want to be patronized and taken care of .my apartment had along light of stairs I had to Scoot my way up on my butt if I wanted to leave. I spent my time using walls to baLance walking in circles over over again. By new years 2018 I was able to move on own again not wel but independent. It’s been 5 years and I haven’t back to the gym. But I A very active job, even to this day I don’t know if my legs behave fully recovered I get tired far faster then those around me but I never let that stop me doing what I love

Lou socializes with farmers before getting up on a platform and begins to speak.
"Auckland elites have been making a tizzy about knowing what's best for the South Island when it comes to climate change. But when you've sat your lazy ass in an office cubicle for your entire career, instead of actually working the land here in the South Island, let me say that your opinion doesn't mean much to me! In fact this backlash against the urban elites is happening worldwide! The farmers' party in the Netherlands recently swept elections there, and I think it's time to copy that movement here! South Island farmers have been under the boot of Auckland and Wellington elites for too long, and instead of looking for solutions by Auckland and Wellington politicians, lets get solutions made by and for South Islanders!"
"We cannot let Auckland and Wellington manage our environment! They'll call us reactionaries and ignorant for not supporting their version of climate change combat. But let me tell them, we recognise that climate change is a problem! We want to combat the polluting industries of Auckland and Wellington to quit pushing their pollutants in the air!"
"As your MP I'll push for reasonable climate change policies which will allow us to fight climate change while allowing farmers in Southland to continue to succeed! As your MP I will support subsidies for farmers to help them convert their farming operations towards more environmentally friendly options, and will work to invest more into research into these options. I'll also push to combat factories and industries which do much more harm than hard working farmers who work to provide for their families and their nation! But I'll also push against Wellington if they aim to strong arm brash and extreme regulations on South Island farmers, crippling their work and leading to bad news. We cannot harm South Island farmers to make some urban elitists who insist on drinking out of paper straws feel good!"
"And of course, the greatest way to defend and fight for South Island farmers is through our own parliament, where South Islanders get to decide how their farms are run, how their environment is managed, and how they want their future to be! We'll work to roll back regulations on our farmers that Wellington blindly set, while also adding regulations where Wellington elites lack! A South Island Parliament is the best way for South Island to fight climate change, and fight for farmers, as only South Islanders can truly understand what we want and what we need. No Aucklander, no foreign businessman will define how we fight against climate change, and how we fight for farmers!"
"This election I want to make sure that farmers finally get the representation and support they deserve! No more ignorance from Wellington, but instead action from Christchurch! This election give your vote for the South Island, and vote for the South Island People's Party!"

First three causes are worldwide as experts attest, rest locally specific.

1. POVERTY AND LOW WAGES - exacerbated by high cost of living in COVID's pandemic. 300.000 at mercy of the "poverty line" years, this oil rich land. A man's belly drives him to misdeed, unable to socially progress nor live humanely, all the while stressed.
   
2. FAMILY - a forthright examination pegs this. More attention from authorities is warranted
   
3. MENTAL HEALTH – nary anyone in power brings up its role. Would like a ministry of “mental health and loneliness.” COVID drove Japan that way, a low crime state no less.
   
4. DRUG SMUGGLING – the ONE PERCENT ship in vast amounts as intercepted shipments attest. TT is a transhipment point. They bring the drugs people use and guns young, disadvantaged black males die from, the “law” disproportionally targets, unable to so much as prosecute one of the upper class.
   
5. FAILURE TO FULLY DECRIMINALIZE – i.e. light and heavy, in the class of weed and cocaine respectively. JAIL SHOULD BE EXCLUDED AS A POSSIBILITY FOR USING. Weed simply regulated and casual smoking permitted, cocaine has REHAB and WELFARE open to the vulnerable.
   
6. POOR EDUCATION SYSTEM – “outdated” sufficient appendix too. The British system is DESIGNED TO MAKE FACTORY WORKERS UNWILLING TO THINK FOR THEMSELVES SERVING THE EMPLOYER CLASS. Cuts in education bound to leave their mark in addition. CANADA is the world’s highest proportion of tertiary graduates in a population – brought on by high expenditure. Would like a FINLAND model – school equality; master’s degree for teachers; relaxed atmosphere; no homework (as a school counsellor told me); end of SEA and all standardised tests save for 17 year olds; subsidized day-care.
   
7. HARSH PRISON – as things stand are criminal schools. REHAB must be at the forefront. NORWAY provides living comforts; prisoner education from trade skill to degree; good behaviour rewards that are EARNED; 2 year guard training; what’s more POST RELEASE SOCIAL WELFARE PROGRAMS.
   
8. OVERCROWDED PRISONS – 7 speaks for itself. 5 would reduce the number. Reform the law such that prison is ONLY FOR THE HEAVY CRIMES, ALL minor offenses made non imprisonable – those people released at once. ALTERNATIVES TO PRISON the norm like home detention and scalable fines (size determined by wealth).
   
9. POORLY TRAINED POLICE – end the joke of 6 months. NORWAY’S undergo a journey of three years to a BACHELOR DEGREE. Leadership roles require an extra 2 to a MASTER’S. TTPS’ disregard for assault complaints and tendency for criminality does not need explanation.
   
10. Coast Guard's training must be more robust - make as America's. The US Coast Guard Academy at FOUR years, awarding a Bachelor of Science degree.
    

In short reform.

People only need me when they never had someone and when they do, would cast me out like a leper
In garden of life, everyone used me as a umbrella for their rain of sadness and throw me away, when the rainbow of other's presence comes
But in freezing cold of isolation and loneliness nobody could even spare a look of whether how I am doing, but in the ever going winter of isolation, the internal wounds to my character are so deep, even though I will be good to others.
I won't and can't open to someone ever, as this isolation as killed me.
In my loneliness, I turn to solving other people's problems, pain and so on, and understanding other people's struggle to be good for the sake of good, atleast in the end I am myself accountable to my own morality.
I try my best to do good and just, even though it doesn't matter how much internally I am being hollowed out and being damaged by it.
I am what I am, what could I do.
Is there any hope for me ?