If you're a fan of Murkoff, this post might make you angry (if so, maybe just skip this post entirely).
After going through the intro POV cutscene in The Outlast Trials, I started to think a bit more about what this corporation actually is and what it aims for. And that might've been a mistake, because right now I cannot see the Murkoff Corporation as nothing else than a cheesy PG-rated stereotypical comically-super-evil company.
In other words, the Murkoff Corporation internal policy and the way the research is lead is highly inefficient at best and highly prone to incidents (those we know too well, as we played an active role in those).

Research

Let's start with the research. The Trials (specifically the intro scene) gave us an insight into early Murkoff's gruesome treatment of their testing subjects. I don't want to sound as some Ethics Committee squeak (although Murkoff does need some EC a lot), but the gore and violence is super-excessive, needless, and technically problematic for the following reasons:

• The place is anything but sterile, making it almost guaranteed for patients to catch an infection and die within days at best.
• Patients don't get anesthetics and all procedures are done when awake and conscious. Good luck performing a surgical procedure correctly when the patient is defending themselves (also a great way to have them accidentally killed). Not to mention the psychological trauma would have a great negative impact on the research (especially given how likely early stage it is).
• Patients get their night-vision goggles literally drilled into their skull. This is the needless part, because those goggles can be strapped on your head just fine. But I guess Murkoff just needs to have an agenda of a satanistic cult devoted to bring sacrifices to Azazel (that's like the only explanation that would make sense).
• The argument that the patients are expendable can be said, but then again, why hard-attaching expensive devices on them if those would need to be somehow removed from their corpses in a hostile environment, and why performing surgeries that drastically decrease their chances of survival?

In Trials, we somewhat learn that Murkoff experiments with a mind-control technology. Then I guess Murkoff is in its "revolutionary startup idea" phase, because the whole project gives the impression of a remote variation of the Squid Game (especially given the theme of the testing environment and objectives of the scenario).
Typically (or rather ALWAYS), you want to make your tests in a controlled environment in order to prevent a security breach and to monitor the test a lot better with no external interferences. If a mind-controlling technology is developed there, the tests should be about following specific orders, not about running in a dangerous environment where the only way to survive is to actually do the objectives (something a normal healthy person would do anyway in order to survive). Not to mention there is a high risk of the subjects being injured or incapacitated, preventing you from using the subjects anytime soon, researching what the effects of the technology do in a long run, or if it's possible to expose people to that technology repeatedly.
(If Murkoff has this already sorted out, then the Trials are nothing more than an amusement park with no research value.)
Probably only the Temple Gate experiment is somewhat plausible in theory, although despite the remote location, Murkoff completely neglected securing the perimeter of the experiment area, allowing the test subjects to escape and people from outside to enter the area. I would also mention the non-existing monitoring of the experiment, but there is no info on that (who knows, maybe they just fly drones over the place 24/7).

Security and personnel

When I mentioned the Ethical Committee and that Murkoff could use one, it is not for the sake of public relations as much as for the Murkoff personnel. If your company does some gruesome (mostly needless) crimes against humanity, you're on a way to alienate your own people. A scientist, a security member, a technician, a programmer, doesn't matter, once they witness some of those horrendous crimes, they may start to question whether the cause they signed up for is actually any good (spoiler alert: it's not, Murkoff is just evil to be evil for the sake of being evil).
And this is just the starting point. The personnel then gradually decides or is quickly pushed into decision between the following options:

• Simply quit working for Murkoff Evil Inc.
• Publicly expose the company either via whistleblowing confidential and incriminating data from inside the company, publicly speaking against the company, or contacting authorities about the situation (the last one is likely ineffective if Murkoff works directly with the government, but we don't have any confirmation on that).
• Sabotage the project or the facility if no other option is possible, causing damage that needs to be cleaned up and slowing down the research progress.

Yes, Murkoff does have it's security policy that keeps the personnel "in line" with the brute force of intimidation and silencing, however this approach further alienates the people (potentially those that have not yet come in contact with the "secret" stuff as well). Not to mention the personnel needs to be under increased supervision even outside the Murkoff facilities.
But if you're in the "screw ethics" camp, then let's talk about money. Internal surveillance, investigations, incident cleanups, seeking replacements for lost people, or any damage caused by the policy eventually slurps a lot of money. Kinda funny the Insurance Mitigation Department exists to minimize financial and legal costs, despite the fact that Murkoff does everything to increase the costs.
But if you're also in the "money goes brrr" camp, then keep in mind that Murkoff Corporation is a publicly known company that still has its PR and legal obligations to take care of (good luck explaining why a helicopter crashed near your facility in the local news). If things go out and the government has no other option than to make a full crackdown on the entire company, the only thing Murkoff can do is to go on a permanent vacation to a third world country with an authoritarian regime rule where it would be out of reach of any justice.
And before anyone suggests using the "mind-control" technology against the establishment, why Murkoff doesn't already use that technology on it's own personnel to make them loyal and obedient before they actually realize who's good or bad?

Conclusion

I could also nitpick details such as Doofenshmirtz (I mean Murkoff) using it's actual name on a scam poster, or buildling an experimental lab right under a large clinic that can be turned into an unwanted Rat Park experiment with a single outbreak, but I already gave it more than enough roast.
Murkoff Corporation does stupid things. I guess the reason for it is purely narrative - to have an evil large corporation that is responsible for the mess you got dropped into as the player (but I don't want to dive into the narrative decision issue as that would be another, even edgier essay). But if Red Barrels decided to expand the lore of Outlast further, maybe they should've made Murkoff a company with an actual believable reason.

Chapter VI
The first land we sighted after leaving Sydney was the Three Kings, New Zealand. We had run before a fair wind up to this time, and had come into what was regarded as a good whaling ground. Now every eye was scanning the horizon, since a bottle of grog was promised to the man who should first sight a whale. I had been on the port watch since I came on board under Mr Hawkins, the chief mate, and one evening, just as our watch below was ending, I went aloft to see the sun set. Against the broad, red horizon I saw some dark objects spouting and tumbling. In an instant I had shouted “Whales ho!” to claim the bottle of grog. “Where away?” was the skipper's question. “On the lee bow, sir.” For an instant he scanned the spot with his glass, an anxious moment for me lest I should have mistaken a shoal of porpoises for a school of whales, and not only lose my prize but expose myself to the ridicule of my fellow sailors. “Right you are, it's whales, sure enough; you have won your grog, lad.”
We had no time to lose; the night would soon be on us, and our chance would be lost. Down went the boat with Ned Farne, our harpooner, in the bows ready to launch his weapons when opportunity offered. On came the school, tumbling and blowing, throwing jets of water ten or fifteen feet into the air, causing a very grand yet terrible scene. At length they got almost within range; the boys were pulling like mad to keep up with the pace the whales were swimming at. We saw Ned rise up in the bows, poise his arm back for an instant, then launch the harpoon straight for the huge back of the fish that was nearest to him. The aim was true, the missile was buried over the barb in the soft blubber beneath the outer skin, and away went the whale dragging the harpoon rope after it so rapidly that they had to pour water upon the side of the boat to prevent it from igniting, through the violent friction. Again the huge creature rose to breathe, and another harpoon was driven into it, causing it once more to rush away through the water at lightning speed. Darkness fell over the scene before they had killed it, and the boat remained by the carcase all night to prevent it sinking. When morning came it was a busy scene on board, preparing to cut it in and try it out. At length the task was completed, and five large sacks of oil were secured; not a large yield certainly, but the foretaste of better things, we hoped. We cruised over the same ground for several days, but saw no more whales, accordingly we stretched across to Curtis' Island, about 500 miles to the north-east, where in about a month we got five or six more, some of them giving very fair yields of oil. After this we ran down upon Norfolk Island, where we fell in with the Mercury, schooner, Captain Barnet, also on a whaling cruise from Tasmania. From her we shipped two additional hands, and then made for Moreton Bay, on the coast of Queensland. Here not a solitary fish was to be seen, therefore we ran back for our old ground off Curtis' Island. Scarcely had we arrived when we fell in with a heavy gale from the north-east, raging for twenty days, in which we had to heave to, not being able to show a rag of sail. On the 21st day, when the wind began to lull, we found ourselves off the Three Kings, a drift of more than 500 miles. We had shipped such heavy seas, and the force of the storm had been so great, that our tryworks had been carried away, and three of our boats stove in. Therefore we bore up for the Bay of Islands, where we arrived on the 10th of April, 1811, anchoring as before off Te Puna. We were the only vessel in the bay at the time, though others entered during our stay.
The same day that we reached our anchorage a chief named Taua Makia came aboard to take care of us and watch over our interests, lest we should be swindled in trade or otherwise maltreated. This considerate proceeding was not disinterested, but the ‘consideration’ expected was not large. The Skipper ordered a boat to go ashore and bring a load of gravel to serve as shot for our guns since this had been omitted in the ship's supplies, and the natives were not to be trusted, even though we had a protector. The news had spread like wild-fire that a ship was at anchor in the bay, and already scores of canoes were being launched to pay a visit to the pakeha, but we loaded our guns, and pointing them astern, ordered all the visitors to keep back, which, after a little demur and grumbling they did. Nevertheless, all throughout our stay, they never desisted in the attempt to get on board, considering it a gross breach of hospitality on our part to deny them the privilege. As our example was imitated by Captain Walker, of the Endeavour brig, that came in a few days after us, having on board two missionaries for Tahiti - Messrs Davidson and Williams - the natives concluded that in us they had got a very bad and uncivil customer to deal with.
Meantime we had commenced work upon the repairs of the vessel. Nearly all our spars had been carried away, together with our jibboom and some of the bulwarks; we had lost every boat but one, and small leaks were demanding attention, We bad two sawyers on board, and as Captain Walker had three whom he lent us for the time, our skipper thought it best to put the ship thoroughly to rights here, in place of putting back to Sydney. Accordingly, the sawyers went ashore, rigged up the pits, and commenced work vigorously. But the Maoris did not exactly see the force of this. They imagined that we were concocting some diabolic scheme of destruction against them in making such extensive preparations, which they considered as in some way identified with our worship. They pulled down the works and threatened to kill the sawyers if they attempted to resume operations. But a volley from the vessels soon scattered them, and a strong guard being picked from the crews of both ships, they were hereafter permitted to labour uninterruptedly. During this time, I had considerable liberty granted to me to go ashore, or to go fishing with Taua Makia. The first time I availed myself of the former privilege, I received as great a scare as ever I had in my life. Three of us had been wandering about in a bit of bush near the Keri-Keri River, trying to find our way back to the saw-pits, when suddenly we issued upon a cleared space, in which were a few houses and patches of cultivation. Before the entrance to one of the whares stood a band of females crowned with chaplets of green leaves, and wringing their hands. One of these, an elderly woman, who seemed to act as chief mourner upon the occasion, and had a chaplet of dog's hair round her temples, different from the others, advanced in front and began to throw her arms about, raising her head and eyes to heaven. Whilst doing this, in a very plaintive quavering tone, she commenced a wailing song, in which she was joined by her companions. I was afterwards initiated into this, and now give a specimen of a funeral lament: -
Taku hei he piripiri (my fragrant bundle the piripiri) Taku hei moki-moki (my fragrant bundle the mokimoki) Taku hei tawiri (my fragrant bundle the tawiri) Taku kati taramea (my sweet juice of the taraniea) Te hei o te pounamu (the companion of the greenstone) I haramai ai - e (is gone - alas, upon) I runga te angai-ia-ana (the angai-e-).
It was the tangi, or wail for the dead. But at this period I knew nothing of Maori customs or ceremonies, and my very hair began to rise with horror as I thought perhaps they might be celebrating some human sacrifices. Our fear kept us quiet. In the thick bush we lay watching the scene, overshadowed by the gloom of a gigantic kauri-tree, and wishing ourselves anywhere but in our present predicament. When the sorrowful song was ended, and the females had entered the whare, we noiselessly strove to retrace our steps, and chance favouring us, we came out a mile or two from where the sawyers were at work. As I afterwards discovered, no duty is so sacred or so obligatory as the interment of the dead, no trouble being considered too great, no expense too excessive, no lamentation too extreme to testify to the respect in which the deceased was held on earth, and to raise him in the estimation of the mysterious spirits to whom he had gone. Taua Makia sometimes went with us fishing to induce the prey to come upon hooks by the constant chanting of Karakias or incantations, supposed to have a very potent influence over the finny tribe. I cannot say we were ever very successful when he was with us, since the noise he made and the fishing gear he would insist upon employing were neither conducive to lure the fish to our bait, nor to hold them when they were hooked. But this, of course, may have been merely an ignorant pakeha's prejudice, since many a lusty kahawai or schnapper, have I caught with a hook made from a dead man's bone. Don't wince, reader; better, is it not, to be put to some use after death, than to feed a legion of hungry worms.
We began to mix a little with the natives when ashore, and I grew more familiarised with their ways. We attended their baptisms, He Tohi, and gave presents to the infant, that it never enjoyed; we consulted the Niu, or divining sticks, whether we should reach home in safety; we were present at their marriage tauas, when the bride was carried off by main force sometimes minus her clothing, finally we were guests at their hakaris, or feasts, and could vouch for the excellence of Maori culinary skill. But we shall have enough of these in the course of the narrative, the reader shall eat and drink to his heart's content but at present we must keep to the thread of our story.
In a fortnight the sawyers had finished their work ashore, a week more completed the repairs aboard, and whatever little trade we had carried on completed, the skipper thought of standing out to sea again. In some mysterious way or other, I had offended the old bosun of our ship, and he had persecuted me with most relentless malice. Nothing I could do was right, the rope's end was my daily sauce, and complaints about my laziness were continually being carried to the captain. At length one day, irritated by their constant occurrence, he said when another of my misdeeds was laid before him, “String him up then, and give him a dozen.” This was just what the bosun wanted; and in a trice he strung me up to the mast, and a good round dozen I received, being only released when nearly fainting with pain and shame. He had got the best of it just now; my day of retribution came again. Now, this method of instructing me in navigation was by no means to my taste, and as two of our men had absconded the day previous, concealed, as was thought, in the bush, I imagined I could emulate their example, perhaps, to join them. At least, I should first go to the Endeavour, as she lay nearer the shore, if not, the bush it must be. Therefore, waiting my opportunity, about 3 o'clock one morning I slipped overboard and swam noiselessly to the companion ship. As I came alongside puffing and blowing, thoroughly exhausted with the long swim, and almost inclined to give up the business, the carpenter, who was acting as bosuns mate in the Endeavour for the time, saw me, and flung me a rope, by which I climbed on deck. I told him my story, and as he was a decent sort of a fellow, he was slipping me quietly along the deck to the foc'sle, when the second mate saw us and demanded to know what I wanted there. With my usual readiness, I invented a tale of a morning swim and exhaustion, but the story would not hold water, and the captain was informed of my arrival. As soon as morning broke he sent over to the Harwich, telling Captain Simmons that I was on board his vessel, and about nine our skipper came over with two men to take me back. Reluctantly enough I went, as I knew a flogging was in store for me, but to my surprise the captain only took me into his cabin and rated me soundly for my foolhardiness in risking my life thus, telling me I escaped a flogging by his having discovered many of the bosuns stories to be untrue. My condition was now better on board, as I was taken aft, and kept under the captain's own eye. My enemy, the bosun, was speechless with rage, yet he was powerless now to do me harm.
About a week after this the Endeavour sailed, Captain Walker having come on board the Harwich and taken a very friendly farewell of our skipper, and a fortnight afterwards we followed suit, going back to our old cruising ground at the Three Kings. The weather was very uncertain and squally, so that we did not see any whales; therefore we stretched over to Norfolk Island, and speedily were busy at work.
The first day we arrived we secured three whales, which we cut in and tried out, the third day two more, and the fifth day another. Then our luck seemed to change, and not a solitary fish could we see for an entire month. We tried all our former grounds, Curtis' Island, Moreton Bay, Three Kings, to no purpose, only when off the East Cape did we catch sight of a small whale, which we secured but only got one barrel of oil from it. The weather now began to be very stormy; winter was at its depth, and the air was piercingly cold. Therefore Captain Simmons concluded to break the cruise, to run for Sydney, discharge his cargo of oil, and commence anew. Another consideration, also, was that several of the men were very ill with scurvy and dysentry - in fact, the crew was only at half at its usual complement, therefore the cry was “about ship,” and “Sydney ho!”
It was whilst running home before a fine fresh breeze, that one night we were knocked up by Mr Hawkins singing out, “Ship on fire on the weather bow.” The shock was electrical. Everyone bundled out of their hammocks and rushed on deck. There on the horizon was a grand and terrible spectacle. A large ship was burning from stem to stern, lighting up the gloom of the winter's night for miles around, throwing a deep lucid glare over the inky ocean. The flames were bursting up the hatches, were licking the masts and spars, were peeping out in little forked tongues through the portholes. The captain ordered lights to be burned at the masthead, blank charges to be fired from the guns every minute, and the jolly-boat to be manned and to go in search of survivors. In an hour our efforts were rewarded by three boat-loads of fear-stricken men boarding us and asking reception. They informed us that the burning ship was the “Lady Lucy” from Sydney to London, that she had caught fire when a week out, from a burning candle falling into an oil cask, and that over 50 lives had already been lost through the capsizing of two of their boats. Captain Simmons made them welcome, and a few days after we reached Sydney, where they were taken in hand by the Government and forwarded home by the next vessel. Thus ended my voyage in the Harwich, perhaps the most pleasant of all my trips.

Has anyone else come out of their high stupor only to be resentful, depressed, and overall angry at the life situation that weed allowed them to be okay with?
I’ve fallen behind vs my peers and I have allowed myself to become underpaid in my career because I never fought for the raises I deserve. The only part of my life I am happy with is my relationship and friend circle but otherwise I am very dissatisfied in my progress thus far. At my core Im a driven person and even under weed’s spell I’ve managed to do okay for myself objectively but I can’t help but think how far I’d be if I didn’t let this substance control my life for 14 years, most of which were my development years. It hurts but I’m using it as fuel to never touch the stuff ever again.
In just 3 weeks sober I’ve already told my manager I need a mid-year promotion/raise and that I’m willing to fight tooth and nail for it, cleaned up my resume, and some of my sober friends have commented on me being more coherent now. However my main goal is to not let this anger and resentment drive me to smoking again.

Hello! I'm new to PharmacySchool so forgive me if this has been posted before. So I recently was accepted into a couple pharmacy schools and will be attending one of them in the fall. When I applied to pharmacy school I was in the middle of a pharm tech program and I honestly wasn't sure if I would get into pharmacy school in general.
Anyways, I'm about to test for my technician license and it has come to my attention that pharmacy students can work as pharmacist interns while in school. My question is whether it would be unusual to work as a tech while in pharm school since I'm about to complete the program, or if I should just move on to work as a pharmacist intern? Also I'm wondering how common is it for students to work while in school in general? I'm either going to be in Washington state or Colorado here in the U.S. Thanks a million!

First Chapter
Chapter Fifteen
“Thank you, Ms. President, and Mr. Secretary-General. It’s my privilege to come and speak to everyone present during such a momentous time in human history. One which, I hope, will lead to a brighter future for us all…”
US President Correa’s boilerplate beginning flowed out as she scanned the room. Behind her rostrum sat a larger dais tiled with green marble, behind which sat the UN President, Secretary-General, and Under-Secretary-General. Two huge screens flanked the dais, and those screens now showed Correa’s face as she continued.
“…and we are committed to our country’s pledge to finding a peaceful and just way for Coalition technology to be incorporated worldwide, and to not attempt any reverse-engineering of our own. Make no mistake; we do not do this out of any sense of altruism or fairness, as pleasant as that may sound. We will hold this pledge sacred for the simple reason that, if the United States were to attempt such efforts the rest of the world would, without a doubt, find out. That, of course, would lead to a great instability.”
‘Great instability’ was diplomatic-speak for ‘the rest of the world then gangs up on the USA and then everything goes to hell’.
“I know there has already been a great deal of debate in this august hall as to the best way to proceed forward, in a fair and impartial manner. We believe that we have found what one might call a ‘trial run’ which will allow us to work out such matters.”
The general murmuring from the many semi-circular rows of desks in front of her increased.
“To begin with, during the first weeks after first contact we wanted to make sure our guests from the Coalition would not starve to death. Much like humanity’s own ships during the Age of Sail, Coalition exploration vessels store enough provisions for years…but such provisions never last. They have very advanced recycling, but mostly for water and even that is only a stop-gap measure. It is unknown even at this time as to how long it will take to repair the Exultant Finger of Rithro, and we did not want to risk the crew running out of food.
“Therefore, we undertook an emergency effort to have their ship’s medic examine various Earth foods to determine their compatibility with our guests’ varied biochemistries. I am pleased to report that there are quite a few Earth foodstuffs which are indeed compatible, although there are some specific items which act as allergens amongst some of the Coalition species. During these efforts, we did learn a bit about how their alien biochemistries work…information which has been duly published and is now openly available. We also began to get glimpses of something wonderful, and asked the Coalition crew for more details. They supplied us with some general ideas of what their medical technology can accomplish; I must emphasize that we do not possess any knowledge of how they can perform such miracles.”
Now the murmuring got quite a bit higher, but not quite to the point where they’d have to call for order.
“Yes, I use the word ‘miracles’ advisedly. For example, take Captain Sadaf. You have all seen her, and how she moves like a person in the prime of their life. Now. What if I told you that she is a little over four hundred years old?”
The murmuring died down into a shocked silence.
“Her species, the auhn, is no more long-lived than we are…but they are able to regenerate and remove the effects of aging. I hope the esteemed ambassadors can see what I am driving at. I propose that we set up a research institute, international in scope, to be placed at a neutral location which is still to be determined. The purpose of that institute will be to study and adapt Coalition medical technology for use in humans.”
Now the murmuring started again; she hoped they were actually listening instead of hatching side-deals with each other.
“You all have families and friends. I’m sure you have at least one family member, one good friend, who died of some horrible and unnecessary affliction. Think of what this means to the world, to us. It is also an excellent way to determine the inevitable issues and frictions which will arise from such a concerted international effort, and that, in turn, will inform our efforts in mutual reverse-engineering of other Coalition technology.
“I know this is, in many ways, a frightening time. Change can be frightening. But I am convinced that you will all know the right way forward, and that you will all see the need for us to unite in this matter, even if others may not be so clear-cut. I thank you for the opportunity to speak.”
As she stepped away from the rostrum, the UN President cleared his throat.
“We will now begin the debate on Madame President Correa’s proposal. Paper copies, with specifics of the proposal, are now being distributed to you all. We’ll now begin the debate period…yes, the gentleman from Portugal…?”
__________
Correa’s Chief of Staff was a shorter, tubby man with an olive complexion by the name of Pablo Rosas. He and Correa sat in a White House conference room, staring at a big screen which now showed the results of the UN vote. “Well, I suppose that went about as well as we could expect,” said Rosas.
“Yep. I was surprised they even agreed with our asking them to kick in some money.”
Rosas chuckled. “Keep in mind that all of this new medical tech will be available for anyone patent-free. Should be air-tight legally, since nobody here on Earth invented it; we’re merely adapting it. I think that was the sweetener we needed to get it passed.”
The president gave a brief nod, then tapped a few keys on the controls in front of her. The screen now showed a world map. “Now we just have to figure out where to put the damn thing without everyone getting butt-mad about it.”
“Hmm.” Rosas laced his fingers over his substantial gut as he regarded the map. “Someplace not ‘the usual’, then.”
Correa growled in frustration. “I keep thinking Switzerland, but I know there’s gonna be a lot of shit flung about that it’s too European-centric. Taiwan would be great; they’ve got both a good tech base and excellent transport infrastructure.”
“But way too controversial, for obvious reasons,” replied Rosas. “Japan?”
“China will, again, kick up a fuss. Huh. New Zealand?”
“That might work. They tend to be more neutral…but then again some might say they’re in too close with Australia, and that this whole effort is too Western-centric.” His eyes flicked back to north on the map. He was about to move his gaze elsewhere, but then he paused. “What about Iceland?”
“Iceland?” Correa almost scoffed, then looked more thoughtfully at the map. “Okay, they’re a NATO member which is a minus. But they tend to remain mostly neutral, which is a plus. Decent transportation infrastructure…don’t we have a naval air base there?”
“I think so, let me check…” Rosas tapped at his phone. “Hey, Jack? What can you tell me about any US naval air bases in Iceland? Just the highlights.” After a couple of minutes, he responded with a curt, “Okay, that’s enough, thanks.”
He put his phone away. “We kinda-sorta have one, at a place called Keflavik. The base there used to be a lot bigger during the Cold War. Then we shut it down after the Soviets were no longer a going concern. Iceland uses it now, and they allow us to fly submarine-search aircraft out of there, but a few years ago they nixed the DOD’s request to rebuild it into a more permanent base.”
“That does work in their favor. It makes for better optics if they’re known for keeping NATO at arm’s length.”
Rosas sat up. “Think the UN will go for it?”
“We can only try. I’ll have our ambassador in Reykjavik make some discreet inquiries, let’s see if they’d be okay with our proposing them as a candidate.”
The Chief of Staff smiled. “If it goes through, this institute will be pumping well north of a billion dollars per year into their economy. That should make it more than ‘okay’.
__________
Agent Cécile Savoie sat in a secure-location breakroom, silently grumbling as she held an as-yet un-drunk mug of coffee in her hands. As the agent-in-charge of the security detail during the Camp David incident, she’d been put on administrative leave, right alongside every other agent who’d been there. But it wasn’t like she had much down time; the inquiry board into that incident now summoned her damn near every other day for yet another round of tedious questioning.
“Hey,” said Hanson as he strolled in, looking just as sour as she felt.
She looked up in surprise. “Hey yourself. I thought you were assigned to the alien detail.”
“I was,” he said as he seated himself across the circular table from her. “Guess being in Alabama when the shitshow went down wasn’t far enough away to be completely out of suspicion. I just finished running my own gauntlet. But the rumor is, I’m getting it easy compared to everyone who was at Camp David, including the special forces people. Especially you.”
“Yeah, it’s pretty much a colonoscopy every day,” she muttered. “Going over the timeline, where I was at which times, who I had direct line of sight on, who I was in radio contact with.” She finally sipped her coffee.
Hanson’s sour expression deepened. “Do you really think it was one of us?”
She sighed. “It has to be. My gut tells me that there’s more than one mole and I told the inquiry board as much. The fuckers who got in knew too much about our patrol patterns, where everyone was, when they’d have a clear shot at an infil. That means someone with access to our methods and comms, and as to the latter we don’t use CB radios.”
The other agent leaned back. “Fuck. I wish I knew why any of us would do that. We’re supposed to be quiet professionals, not frothing radicals.”
Savoie turned the mug in her hands. “Not to tell tales out of school but, through the whisper network, they’ve been leaning hard on the captured dudes from the attack. Apparently one of their main ‘objections’,” and here she made some one-handed air quotes, “is that they think the whole Breaker thing is a ruse. It’s all smoke and mirrors, so that we’ll beg the Coalition to come and save us. And then…well, it gets vague after that but I guess they claim that at best we’ll get turned into the galactic equivalent of a Native American reservation. Worst case, we all get harvested for our precious bodily fluids.”
Hanson stared at her for a moment in disbelief. “That is, if you will forgive the uncouth term, utterly retarded. For chrissake, the Hubble got some beautiful shots of their ship once they’d spun that shield around to reveal it to us. I mean, I’m no spacecraft expert but even I could tell it had gotten the shit pounded out of it.”
She responded with a shrug. “Hey, Flat Earthers are still a thing.”
“Flat Earthers don’t stage FUCKING mortar attacks in our nation’s capital,” snapped Hanson. Then he subsided and spoke more softly. “Sorry, I shouldn’t be so on edge. This whole thing just pisses me off.”
“Join the club,” said Savoie as she sipped more coffee. “I just don’t get it, though.”
Hanson made a gentle ‘continue’ wave of his hand.
She leaned forward. “Okay. Our comrades in the CIA managed to identify the four who made it into the compound. They were all mercenaries, each with at least ten or fifteen years of experience in kicking ass around some of the worst hot spots in the world. Syria, Burma, bunch of places in Africa. One of ‘em even turned out to be ex-Wagner group.”
“Okay?” It was a leading single-word question, but not an unkind one.
“So why was the rest of the attack made up of nothing but a bunch of goddamn shit-kickers? And that includes the aborted attempt in Decatur. I’ve seen the files of those we rounded up in the Camp David attack. They were all low-life idiots just banging around, maybe they might have once held a gun in their lives. Hell, from what I’ve heard, the shootings that triggered the alarm at Camp David were an accident; those intruders were supposed to sneak around that patrol, not kill them. They all had the same top-of-the-line kit, so we know whoever is behind this has deep pockets. Why not hire an entire bunch of competent people instead of doing it onesy-twoseys?”
“It is a puzzle.” Hanson got up and set a styrofoam cup of water into the nearby microwave. As the cup turned within its electromagnetic prison, he leaned against the nearby counter and pondered her question. “Maybe the team in the woods was intended just as a distraction?”
“That’s what I thought at first, but then I reconsidered. I mean, what if the four who went in failed? You’d still need a proper backup plan. Same thing with the Decatur bunch. By the way, did they ever catch them?”
Hanson let out a dark chuckle. “Decatur PD found a pile of vests and rifles, hastily wiped down. They were able to pull a few partial prints off of ‘em. My guess is they’ve fled to the proverbial four winds, hoping to lay low for the rest of their lives. We’ll nab ‘em eventually.”
The microwave dinged and he retrieved his hot water, then pulled a tea bag out of his jacket pocket as he re-seated himself.
Savoie smiled. “I never figured you for a tea guy.”
He unwrapped the bag and with a bit of ceremony dunked it into his cup. “Well, I used to be a coffee guy, but my gut doesn’t agree with the acidity.”
“We do have tea here, you know.” She pointed to the storage bins behind him.
“Yeah, but it’s cheap-ass stuff. The brand I like is expensive, but worth it…” Hanson’s eyes widened as he trailed off.
She raised an eyebrow. “Hanson? Do you smell burnt toast?”
“They couldn’t afford it,” he said in a near-whisper.
Savoie was about to tell him to stop being overly dramatic, then she realized he might be on to something and that she didn’t dare distract him. “Keep talking.”
He leaned forward, his forearms on the table. “Okay. Imagine you’re a hard-bitten mercenary. You’ve been in the literal shit, in every nasty conflict anyone cares to name. Somehow, someone finds you and comes to you. They say ‘hey, these aliens are bad news, do you want to kill them?’ Even if you, as the hypothetical mercenary, are down with the cause…”
“From what the intruders were yelling, they were,” said Savoie.
“Yeah but even then, our mystery financier is asking you to infil and exfil out of one of the most heavily guarded pieces of real estate on the planet. Oh, and kill a bunch of special-forces-maybe and aliens-definitely in between. What do you do then?”
She replied with a grim smile. “If I’m that mercenary, then I ask for a metric fuck-ton of money. And there were four of them, they would have all done the same. Hell, they must have been doing collective bargaining.”
Hanson dunked his tea bag as he thought it through. “Okay, so our mystery mastermind has a lot of money, but not billions on hand to hire a literal army of hard cases. Huh. So those other dipshits might indeed have been a distraction.”
“Maybe. They must have also spent quite a bit on the mortar attack. That wasn’t made by some hobbyist in their bedroom, they knew what they were doing. Given that nobody saw them set up the launcher or leave, they were more pro.” Savoie hoped that the FBI’s efforts to track the various mortar components turned up something soon. Thus far, those efforts were bogged down; as it turned out, quite a few companies had ordered the identified components, and tracking the subsequent second-hand purchases was time-consuming.
“And those mortar-making pros would be more expensive.” Hanson sipped a bit of tea. “Did they ever get anything off of the launcher itself?”
“Sadly, no. Turns out the whole damned thing was homemade, constructed out of tubing and other off-the-shelf components. It was also wiped down thoroughly, no prints. Like I said, pros.”
“But limited in resources,” said Hanson. “Which explains one of the things that’s bugged me. Namely, that our OPFOR didn’t use some proper artillery. If they have a couple of moles in the Secret Service, then it should be easy to recruit and pay some military dudes to slip ‘em some gear and alter the logs. They could stow a howitzer inside a semi-tractor-trailer. You could park that thing anywhere up to 25 miles away. Use a single 155mm Excalibur GPS-guided munition, boom. That would have pretty much obliterated the stage and everyone on it. Then you just re-stow the howitzer and toodle off all innocent-like, right when everyone is freaking the hell out.”
“So they couldn’t afford that type of arty strike,” she said. “Or they simply didn’t have the contacts to pull that off. Hmm. I wonder if our moles are getting paid at all?”
Hanson resumed his thousand-yard stare. “The mortar attack must have been planned first. The other two attacks feel much more like rush jobs.”
“Eh? Oh, I get it. Sadaf’s speech was known well in advance. It was going to be one of her first big public appearances since the initial presidential speech. They were broadcasting it online to the world. Having her get turned into chunky red salsa, in real time, would be one helluva statement. So that’s what they focused on.” She drank a bit more coffee, and now it was time for her eyes to widen. “Our mole or moles didn’t arrive at Camp David until after Sadaf’s speech was announced.”
“That…oh, yeah, that makes sense. Originally the mortar attack is the OPFORs’ only focus, but yet somehow they’ve suborned one or two Secret Service agents and they have ‘em in their back pocket. Then one, or better yet both, of the moles gets assigned to the Camp David detail, and they realize that now that they have a golden opportunity to get at the other aliens as well. So they go off and hire four pros for the actual attack inside, plus a bunch of chucklefucks to act as a distraction, because that’s all they can afford since the four pros are asking for some serious money.”
Savoie leaned forward. “When did Chao and Grakosh leave Camp David?”
“It was, ah, three? No, four days after we got everyone settled, both the aliens and the special forces types.”
“Okay, so then the OPFOR gets word, courtesy of our moles, that one of the aliens is now heading to Alabama. But now they’re stretched so thin that they can’t afford anything other than to hire another bunch of dipshits to make a run at them and hope for the best.”
“And then the second bunch lets the FNG drive.”
They both laughed, but that humor settled down as they both thought through the chain of inference.
“It is pretty thin,” said Savoie at last. “There’s a lot of assumptions in there.”
“Yeah. But I do like the idea of our moles getting assigned at the last minute.”
She rubbed her forehead. “We had a bunch of new people come in when they decided to stow the Rithro crew there. Seven, no eight in all.”
“It’s a place to start,” said Hanson. He finished his tea. “C’mon, let’s see if we can get a meeting with the inquiry board.”
__________
A little while later and not very far away, three people sat in a well-lit but otherwise deadly dull room. At least the chairs were somewhat comfortable. Matt and Martinez sat at two chairs against one wall, while across from them McCoy sat sprawled sideways on another with a foul look on her face. She glowered at the far beige-painted wall. “This completely sucks. Why can’t we have our phones? I could at least play some mahjong.”
“This is a secure location, Corporal,” replied Matt. “Ixnay on the onephays.”
Martinez’s leg jittered. “How long are we gonna sit here? They said they’d call us in, like, an hour ago!”
“Dunno, it’s some kind of last-minute interview thing,” replied Matt with Zen-like calm.
The corporal looked over at Matt. “I don’t get you, man.”
Matt grinned. “Nobody gets me. I’m like the wind, baby!”
“That’s not…I mean, I watched you open up a dude like he was a bag of fuckin’ Doritos using nothing but a fuckin’ knife. Now you’re being all Caine from ‘Kung Fu’.”
“It’s good to know that the classics are still appreciated,” said Matt.
Martinez pointed at him. “If you start calling me ‘Grasshopper’ I will shoot you.”
McCoy turned her glare to the ceiling. “Maybe it’s a psychological test. They want to see if we crack under pressure and start yakking secrets.”
“I mean, I’m sure they’re recording us right now,” replied Matt. “But it’s merely as a precaution. I am also five-nines certain that none of us are suspects. We weren’t integrated into the compound’s overall security, and thus it would be unlikely that we could have let our four attackers in.”
“Not to mention, we were the ones to kill ‘em,” added Martinez. “Well, except for the one that Takh took care of.”
“Yep. This is…I won’t call it a formality, but the board just wants to know where you were and what you saw. Walk them through your personal timelines, understand? Tell them only what you know. If you don’t know something, then say so.”
McCoy turned herself around so that she now sprawled the other way. “This whole bullshit just bugs me. Takh and the others are off with a bunch of strangers and I…I mean, we aren't there to help protect them.”
Matt and Martinez shared a meaningful glance. “From what I heard, Takh is quite capable of taking care of himself,” said the latter with a grin. “You told me he pitched that one dude across the room like he was throwing a softball.”
For once, the petite corporal looked a bit flustered. “Yeah, but, I mean, what if some other potential bad guy gets the drop on him with a gun? I don’t like not being there. I just wanna know that he’s okay. I should be there, just to make sure.”
The smaller man snapped his fingers in the face of the taller, who sighed and took out his wallet. With great ceremony, Matt pulled out a five-dollar bill and placed it upon the now-upraised palm of Martinez.
“Told ya,” said Martinez with a grin.
She sat up and glared at them both. “That doesn’t mean anything! Takh is a good guy!”
“Nobody said he wasn’t,” replied Matt as he stowed his wallet. “He is indeed a good guy.”
“Yeah, seriously, we’re glad you two hooked up,” added Martinez. “Takh’s solid. Hell, I’d let him date my sister.”
“I. Am. Not. Hooked Up. With ANYONE.” McCoy now looked furious enough to chew nails.
Martinez stroked his chin. “Kissing might be a problem, though.”
Matt performed a similar chin-stroking action. “Hmm, indeed, Corporal, I do believe it might be a serious issue. One has all of those mandibles to contend with.” He hooked his fingers next to his mouth in an approximation of an udhyr’s face. “Still, I think that, with enough will and effort, one could figure it out. Like the man said, life finds a way.”
“But how much tongue is he packing?” posed Martinez. “You know what the man also says. Big dude, big tongue. Could make things more interesting, all around.”
The woman did not look amused. “Martinez, Toke? You are now both officially gigantic flatulating assholes.”
“C’mon, McCoy!” protested Martinez. “Think of it this way. A few years from now, let’s say we filthy humans are now part of the Coalition and I’m at some meet ‘n greet, and I just so happen to spy me an oh-so-very-fiiine udhyr mamacita from across the room. Now, I wanna do my bit for my species and approach her, and get some good old inter-species cultural interaction going on. But there’s all sorts of questions. How do I compliment her without insulting her culture? How am I supposed to get in good with her? How do the mechanics work? How do the various bits line up? We need details! You’re at the tip of the spear, we all need good intel!”
McCoy slumped back into her seat. “Over seven hundred billion Dimmadollars of defense spending, and yet somehow I wind up stuck in a room with you two fuckos…oh, by the way, Toke,” she added, pointing a finger at Matt, “why the hell can you and Sarge never go back to Okinawa?”
“Nice distraction, McCoy,” said Martinez. “My guess is some sort of wet-work shit.”
Matt just smiled. “Oh for fuck’s sake, I don’t kill everyone I meet. I was a Second LT at the time, managed to somehow leapfrog my way into officer ranks all the way from enlisted. Anyways, the Okinawa affair was merely a case of, well, one particular case of rye whiskey. The good sergeant…was he a sergeant then? Oh yeah, we had done some other stuff I can’t tell you about in someplace I can’t tell you where, and we were celebrating Shaw getting his third stripe. We’d got ahold of the previously-mentioned case of whiskey and then we began toasting to each other’s good health. We did a lot of toasting. Quite a lot of toasting. As you can imagine, the toasting went on and on until we, um, well we did some unwise things. It started out with us sparring-for-fun with each other in public and escalated from there. No locals were harmed, and nothing we did was hella illegal, or I would’ve never made Captain. Buuut the local government would definitely throw a shitfit if me or, God forbid, both of us set foot back on the island.” He chuckled. “Hell, the Okinawan customs people probably still have both of our pictures taped up inside their booths with a big old sign saying ‘DO NOT ADMIT THIS PERSON, YOU FOOL’ written above them.”
“What did you do?” asked Martinez. His eyes were big and soulful, like a kid asking for yet one more story before bedtime.
Matt shrugged. “I mean, I don’t remember much for obvious reasons. I’m almost sure we didn’t piss on any monuments, that would have definitely been cause for a serious demotion. We did do a number on some shrubbery, that I do remember. We decided it needed to be trimmed back, and so we did so. Using our bare hands. Seemed like a good idea at the time.”
A fearsome light came into McCoy’s eyes. “Martinez, do you know what this means?”
He looked at her all uncertain. “Um, Toke and Sarge have cast-iron livers?”
“No, you fool. Blackmail material.”
Matt pointed back at her. “Hey, now, I told you that in confidence. Besides, Shaw has a lot more to contend with right now.”
The reminder of the sergeant’s current crippled state brought the elevated atmosphere of the room back down. McCoy nodded as her smile faded. “Right. Hey, did you see the Prez’s speech at the UN?”
“Yep,” said Matt. “From what I’ve read, the political wrangling after it seems pretty tame compared to the usual.”
Martinez snorted. “No shit. Did either of you see the laundry list of shit that we might be able to do? Anti-aging, limb regrowth, cancer treatments which work well and which don’t half-kill the patient…hell, maybe even Alzheimer’s could be in our rear-view mirror. The grand high muckity-mucks are falling all over themselves to get that out into the world, for themselves if nobody else.”
“You’re way too cynical, Martinez,” said Matt.
“Oh fuck off. What if…okay, I know this sounds like a cheesy sci-fi concept, but what if they hoard all of the good shit for themselves and we peons get just the crumbs?”
Matt lapsed back into his meditative demeanor. “In that case, my dear corporal, you or I or McCoy or someone like us will show those hypothetical elites that, while they are indeed long-lived, they are not in fact immortal.”
The trio fell into silence for a few minutes. Then Martinez leaned over towards Matt. “Ah, a little birdie told me you were involved in questioning the prisoners we nabbed at Camp David.”
“I merely facilitated certain conversations,” replied Matt.
Martinez sighed. “What the fuck does that mean?”
“Ask me no questions and I will tell you no lies…Corporal.”
McCoy let out a growl. “Well, I heard these terrorist assholes are saying that the Breakers aren’t real, that it’s all fake videos from the Coalition.”
“Just to play devil’s advocate,” said Matt, “our AI image and video generation is already getting to the point where, soon, we puny humans could manufacture such evidence.”
“What?” Martinez looked as if he was about to launch himself at Matt.
Matt held up a calming hand. “I’m not saying it is fake. The Hubble pics are damned convincing.”
Martinez hiked up one foot to place it on his seat, then rested his chin on his knee. “Fuck. I guess it didn’t convince everyone.” He mused for a few moments. “Wait. What if we made it even more convincing?”
“How?” asked Matt.
“We send some humans up to the Rithro. Two or three at least. The boats can still make it up to the ship, right?”
For once Matt looked uncertain. “I think so? Dunno how many times they can come and go without recharging, we’ll have to ask ‘em.”
“Right, so we set up an even better publicity stunt than the Hubble pics. Choose a few people, from all over the world. We have ‘em travel up to the Rithro, take pics and video up close showing the damage. Even take ‘em inside the ship and get a full tour, maybe…if the crew is okay with that, of course.”
“Huh.” Matt sat back and pondered the idea. “That’s a really good idea, Martinez. I guess you aren’t as dumb as you look.”
The corporal responded with a slight smile at the verbal jab. “We’d need to choose the right people, though.”
“They’d have to be trustworthy…or at least someone that the entire world will consider trustworthy,” said Matt.
“Well known,” added McCoy. She no longer looked vengeful. “With recognizable faces and voices, and then they can go on all the talk shows after and say that, yes indeed, I got a tour of the ship and it is indeed quite banged up.”
Martinez stared at the far wall. “Some kind of celebrity? Heh. You think Tom Cruise would be up for it?”
Matt laughed. “That beautiful maniac? Hell, he’d insist on shooting an entire movie up there, with at least one action scene where he’s hanging off of the outside of the ship.”
They all smiled at the resulting mental image.
“Chao could work,” said McCoy into the silence. “She’s kind of a celebrity now. After all, she was the first human to come into contact with aliens, eh?” She gave Matt a big and very un-subtle wink.
To skirt the rather…unconventional methods used to achieve a positive First Contact, Matt’s role had been very much demoted in the official story. Now every recounting of the tale included a bit of ‘…oh, and there was also another person who stumbled across our brave woman in the midst of her attempts at informational exchange with the aliens…” His exact identity was also not published, under the screen of ‘he wishes to remain anonymous’.
“Oh bite me, McCoy, it’s fun,” replied Matt. He waggled his eyebrows. “Besides, I work better in the shadows!” He threw his forearm across his face like a half-assed Count Dracula trying to hide behind his cape.
Then he dropped his arm. “Yeah, Chao would be good as a current social-media darling. Of course, she might not want that. She strikes me as more of the wallflower type, for the most part.”
“We need more people,” said Martinez, as he stared at the floor. “Chao might be good on her own, but she’s got that motor-mouth talking thing when you get her going. It’s one or the other. Either she’s trying to shrink into a corner and take up as little space as possible, or suddenly you’re getting pulled into another corner for a doctoral dissertation on how minimal-energy transfer-orbits work.”
Matt pondered for a moment. “Wait, when did she do that? I never sat through one of those lectures.”
Martinez looked away and…well, Matt hoped that their supposed overlords were indeed recording this particular moment in time because the hard-bitten Hispanic special-forces corporal actually blushed.
McCoy, of course, realized a golden opportunity for payback and immediately pounced. “Why, Corporal Martinez,” she purred. “Doooo tell us. When did Chao Me Chu, heh, pull you into a corner? Hmmm?”
“She’s…she’s just real nice, that’s all,” replied Martinez. “I asked her a couple of questions, and she answered them. That’s all. We both love classic sci-fi, like Asimov and shit. I guess we bonded over that.”
Matt cleared his throat. “Aaaaand may I remind you two and everyone listening in that we have all been cooped up nuts-to-butts for awhile? Don’t mistake familiarity for romantic bullshit.” He pointed over at Martinez. “But you. If you can follow at least half of what she talks about, then you are absolutely without-a-single-fucking-doubt wasted as a corporal, even if you’re in a low-drag high-speed outfit like this. You hear me?”
“Um, yes sir.” It was the first time in McCoy’s memory that anyone had addressed Matt as befitting his perhaps-former rank.
“Good. You get your ass into college, somehow. You’re a smart guy, you’ll figure all that shit out. And as for Chao? Just give it room to breathe. Let her know you’re interested, but don’t press the matter.”
“Let her know?” For once Martinez looked completely lost. “How do I…” he trailed off. “I mean, I like her…and yeah, I mean I like her in that way, but she’s so damn smart and pretty and I’m just some dipshit meathead.”
“Hey, don’t sell yourself short,” said Matt. “You’re our dipshit meathead.”
McCoy’s vengeful smile faded. “Martinez…no, Luca.”
Martinez looked up in surprise at her use of his first name.
She continued. “Just talk to her. Neither of you have any clue as to what ‘normal’ social interactions look like. In your case, it’s because you’ve been a soldier for all of your adult life. In her case, it’s because she’s, well, because she’s Chao. So just walk up to her and be straightforward. Trust me, it’ll be like a breath of fresh air for her to not have to navigate social cues. Just say something like ‘Hey, I really like you, do you like me and do you want to go get a coffee sometime’? Start with that. Chao’s good people, the worst thing she’ll do is say no. She won’t yell at you or talk shit about you online. Buuuut, some sixth sense is telling me she won’t say no to getting some coffee with ya.”
Matt smiled. “McCoy, I think you might have a calling after you leave the military.”
She snorted. “Oh yeah, I’ll hang up my match-making shingle on the internet and start raking in the big bucks. Martinez is right, though. If we try to do a publicity stunt up at the Rithro, then we’ll need somebody alongside Chao to win the world over. Somebody well-known, but preferably someone not in the traditional Western pop-culture sphere. That’ll make it more palatable…”
Her voice trailed off and she stared into space. The two men now looked at each other in genuine concern until she spoke again a few moments later.
“Guys? I think I just had the best idea ever.”

Hello everyoneSo right now, I am interested in applying and landing a job as an EPIC application analyst at a hospital. I am a fresh graduate from university majoring in life science. During my undergrad year, I have had experience in working in a pharmacy for 3 years so I have exposed to pharmacy software/ patient history software at some degrees. I have intermediate level in MATLAB, R and SAS and right now I am learning SQL and VBA via Linkedin Learning. However, I do not have any experience in working in a hospital or have a lot of clinical works. Can I have some advices about how to make my resume and experience stand out so I can land a job as EPIC analyst? Thank you guys so much

"Fuck it all!" said Stalin. "Atomic bomb! Beria modestly lowered his eyes. Kurchatov was a little late, but he also lowered his gaze and nervously tugged at his beard.
"So, does it explode?" Stalin asked, tapping the pipe against the iron side of the bomb.
"Of course, Comrade Stalin!" Kurchatov replied, feeling that the question was directed at him. "How... How it will!"
"How it will fucking blow!" Beria chimed in.
"They've really invented something," Stalin said, exhaling. "And tell me, does it explode powerfully?"
"I'm telling you, Comrade Stalin, it will blow as much as it can!"
"How it will fucking blow!" Beria supported again, making scary eyes behind his glasses, as if to say that if it blows, it will really blow.
"And what does Comrade Zhukov think?"
Zhukov seemed to have dozed off, but woke up just in time.
"It's a useful thing," the marshal said, jingling his medals. "The army needs it."
"Right," Stalin wisely remarked. "But it needs to be tested. Right, Comrade Voroshilov?"
"Definitely, Koba," the iron commissar supported.
"And on whom? The Jews?"
"It's not worth it on the Jews," Beria boldly said. "We've already tested gases on them. It's not fair."
"Indeed, indeed," Stalin pondered, releasing puffs of smoke. "The Jews might take offense. Thank you, Comrade Beria, for the timely remark. By the way, will you yourself not be a Jew, Comrade Beria? Stalin, as usual, made a successful joke, and everyone laughed. Kalinin and Kurchatov laughed, shaking their beards, Zhukov giggled, Voroshilov laughed out loud, and Beria smiled subtly and said:
"No, Comrade Stalin, I'm Mingrelian."
"Mingrelian, warmed his cock on the stove," Stalin joked again successfully, and the company laughed a little more. Finally, Stalin tapped the bomb with the pipe and remarked:
"It's good that we had a laugh, but we haven't decided yet on whom to test our atomic bomb."
"On the Japanese?" Voroshilov asked questioningly. "We have plenty of Japanese prisoners, and the war isn't over yet, we can catch more. There are still Germans left from that war too."
"Germans and Japanese are a well-tested people," Stalin said. "We've already fought Germans and Japanese. But the atomic bomb should be tested on a nation that we haven't studied yet from the perspective of a battle. Am I right, Comrade Kurchatov?"
Fuck would Kurchatov object.
The bomb was loaded onto the plane and they set off to drop it. In the plane, there were pilots: three-time Hero of the Soviet Union Comrade Kozhedub and three-time Hero of the Soviet Union Comrade Pokryshkin. Kozhedub was the commander of the crew because he shot down 62 enemy planes during the war, while Pokryshkin only shot down 59. That's why Kozhedub rudely told Pokryshkin, who was talking to the technicians:
"Stop talking nonsense, Comrade Pokryshkin! It's time to fly and drop the bomb!"
"Sorry, Comrade Kozhedub," Pokryshkin said and climbed into the plane.
Kozhedub turned the ignition key, pressed the pedals, pulled the levers, and the red-starred plane sped along the concrete strip of the secret airfield.
"They've taken off," Voroshilov said, wiping away a tear.
The plane flew very high. Kozhedub even dozed off from the monotony of the scenery outside the window, while Pokryshkin, out of boredom, started reading poetry:
Late autumn. The crows have flown away. The forest is bare, the fields are empty. Only one narrow strip is not compressed. It brings a sad thought...
"What kind of poetry are you reading, Comrade Pokryshkin?" Kozhedub asked without opening his eyes.
"Poetry by Comrade Stalin, whose else," Pokryshkin replied.
"Well, well. You take the controls for now, and I'll take a nap. Is it still a long way to fly?"
"About a thousand five hundred kilometers," Pokryshkin said, checking the map.
"Alright, then I'll doze off. Wake me up when it's time to drop the bomb."
"And fuck you," Pokryshkin thought vengefully.
The decision was made to drop the bomb on America, it was a great idea of Comrade Stalin. However, he had no idea that Truman had also built an atomic bomb and they were bringing it to drop on the USSR. Not just on the USSR, but on Moscow, to kill Comrade Stalin and the Politburo. But Truman had no way of knowing that Comrade Stalin and the Politburo had already left for a large underground bunker that was built precisely in the hope that the bastard Truman would decide to drop an atomic bomb. The plane, under the control of American pilots, named "Enola Gay," was flying directly toward the Soviet plane. It was called "Enola Gay" because there were faggots on board. That's not surprising, because America has always had many faggots, so finding suitable ones among the pilots was not a problem. It was Truman's subtle mockery of the Soviet people. Like, the Americans would fly in, drop the bomb, and Stalin and the entire Politburo would perish. The Russian people would learn about it from the newspapers the next morning and say to each other, "Did you hear? The Americans bombed Comrade Stalin and the entire Politburo!" - "What faggots!" And indeed, there were faggots there. What a humiliating incident. In short, the faggots were flying toward the Soviet plane of Kozhedub and Pokryshkin, listening to Glenn Miller, and the Soviet pilots had no idea. The flight paths of the planes intersected somewhere over Japan.
"Look, Comrade Kozhedub!" Pokryshkin said, nudging his commander with his foot. "Look... a plane!"
"What is this?" Kozhedub wondered, opening his eyes. Indeed, a large plane was flying towards them, seemingly American.
"These are Americans flying, Comrade Kozhedub," Pokryshkin reinforced his suspicions. "They're flying in our direction! And behind us is Moscow!"
"Let's ask them," Kozhedub decided and opened the window.
"Hey, guys!" he shouted in English, sticking his head out. "Where are we headed?"
"That's what we'll tell him," the Americans thought, but said aloud, "Just around. Taking a ride."
"So are we," Kozhedub lied, and to himself, he noted that there was a big bomb hanging under the tail of the American plane, probably atomic. After hiding back inside, he said to Pokryshkin, "They're bringing an atomic bomb, those faggots. Call Comrade Stalin."
Comrade Stalin sat in the underground bunker and argued with Voroshilov whether the bomb would explode or not, when a telephone operator approached and said, "It's for you, Comrade Stalin."
Stalin asked sternly, "Who is it?"
"It's Pokryshkin, Comrade Stalin!" the pilot hurriedly spoke on the phone. "The Americans are here, Comrade Stalin! Those bastards are also carrying a bomb!"
"Why did you become dumbfounded over it?" Stalin asked.
"We're flying, Comrade Stalin! We just got delayed. It doesn't look good..."
"Hmm... Well, wait a little there, I'll consult with my comrades."
Covering the phone with his hand, Stalin said, "Pokryshkin is calling. He says the Americans are also carrying a bomb, bastards."
"We'll shoot them down," Voroshilov said. "We'll send the fighter squadron immediately."
"I wish you'd shoot them all," Stalin grumbled. "Even a fool can do that."
Here's what we'll do. Get Truman on the other line for me. And he opened the line himself and said to Pokryshkin, "Keep them detained for a while, and we'll make a decision."
"Yes, Comrade Stalin!"
Pokryshkin covered the phone with his hand and said to Kozhedub, "Do whatever you want, Comrade Kozhedub, but we need to detain the American plane. Comrade Stalin will make the decision."
Kozhedub leaned out of the window again and said, "Hey, guys! What's hanging under your tail?"
"A bomb," the Americans said.
"Why is it so big?"
"Just because," the Americans replied, "no big deal. What about you?"
"We have one too," Kozhedub said.
Down below, the Japanese were gathered, wondering what was happening. They tried firing their anti-aircraft guns, but it was all in vain—the planes were too high. Emperor Hirohito called upon the kamikaze pilots, ordering them to fly and shoot down the enemy planes. But the kamikaze, as expected, took their time with the ritualistic songs, drank sake, and tied headbands... The Japanese, what can I say.
In the meantime, Stalin was connected with Truman. "Hello, Mr. Truman?" "Mr. Stalin? How are you, and how's the weather?" "Thanks to your prayers. Here's the thing—a little plane of ours was flying over Japan..." "Well, that's good for you." "But then yours was coming towards it..." "Well, we're at war with them." "But why the bomb?" "Well, we're at war with them! And besides, you have a bomb too." The Americans, those bastards, also called Truman, of course. "We're at war with them," said Stalin. "We'll drop a bomb on them now." "Then go ahead." "No, you go first!" "And you'll deceive us." "We?! Have we ever deceived anyone?!" "Oh, plenty." "And you, even more so." "And you communists, one can't trust communists." "And you bourgeois, one can't trust bourgeois either. Lenin said so. " "Your Lenin is an idiot!" "And your Lincoln is a Jew and a faggot, and Washington is a fool, and Jefferson is a moron, wipe your ass with your constitution on Independence Day. And in general, fuck off." Stalin wisely said, "I'll hang up now." Truman couldn't find anything to say and fell silent. "Alright, Mr. Stalin," he said. "We'll drop the bomb. But you drop one too!" "We'll drop it, we'll drop it," Stalin assured him. The Americans did drop the bomb, and they flew back home. The bomb fell, and it exploded! The next morning, the Japanese went out all over the country, reading newspapers and telling each other, "Did you hear? The Americans dropped a bomb on Hiroshima!" - "Those bastards!" And indeed, they were bastards. What a shameful incident, even for the Japanese, despite being a yellow-faced people. And our planes kept flying over Japan. Then Truman called Stalin and said angrily, "Hello! Mr. Stalin, this isn't fair!" "You got screwed! You got screwed!" Stalin rejoiced. "This is unworthy," Truman said. "Well, who cares." "We didn't agree on this." "So what?" "You promised to drop the bomb too!" "But we didn't. We'll drop it on you now, haha!" "Then we'll drop another one on you! We still have it!" "Wait a moment, Mr. Truman, I need to consult with the Politburo," Stalin said, getting serious. "It's quite possible that they have another bomb," Beria said, after listening. "Don't we have one?" Stalin asked. "Not yet, Comrade Stalin," Kurchatov was scared. "But we'll make one soon!" "Too late," Stalin waved his hand. "So, what should we do?" "Let's drop it there. I suggested testing it on the Japanese," Voroshilov proposed. "Alright, but not right away. Let Truman squirm a little," Stalin said and contacted Truman again. "Hello, Mr. Truman? Well, we're considering it."
The Red Star plane circled above Japan, running low on fuel. The heroic crew finished their last can of canned meat when a message finally came from the ground: "Drop it closer. Stalin." "What do we have there?" unshaven Kozhedub rejoiced, pulling the map closer. "Let's see... Osaka... Yokosuka... Nagasaki..." "They're all bitches and bastards over there," Pokryshkin said, licking the can from the inside. "Which bastard was the last one?" "Nagasaki," read Kozhedub. "Well, fuck 'em then," said Pokryshkin, pressing the button.
Thus, in 1945, there was no nuclear war between the two great powers.

Hello! I’m on a search for a good vanilla for layering, but I have no idea which vanilla will work best for me.
Based off recommendations on the subreddit, Kyse, NAVA, Arcana, and CocoaPink are most popular.
Kyse is closed until July at the moment, so can’t try them. I’ve heard great things about Delizia di Marshmallow and Bonbons a la Vanille!
CocoaPink is currently at a 6-9 week TAT/30-45 business days, which really sucks cause I found out I really like their Triple Vanilla Dream. It’s actually the point of this post lol, to find an alternative vanilla with faster TAT.
Arcana’s vanillas have been too sour? The only ones I’ve tried were Vanilla Craves Crescent Moons and the Candy Cane layering note has a vanilla in it. I didn’t find myself liking it because it’s very buttercream frosting and I think I want to smell more like baked/caramelized vanilla…? (Which vanilla is this by the way?)
I’ve also sampled several SS vanillas and Estate Vanilla is the same warmth as Triple Vanilla Dream but it’s just too boozy lol. I still enjoy it for it’s lasting powers but definitely pure vanilla extract.
NAVA, I genuinely have no idea how to read their accords and have tried to research the subreddit. If any of you guys have NAVA vanillas, what’s the warmest, vanilla-extract but not so boozy, delicious vanilla? I think PV3, Moonstone, and Eternal Ankh or Eternal Tut Ankh Mun would work best but I’m not sure anymore lol.
P.S. I’m a pharmacy technician for work and if anybody’s sniffed MegaRed krill oil or happens to take divalproex delayed release (vanilla scented weirdly enough,) I’d love some vanilla recommendations on those. It’s a weird request for sure haha.

I admire your luck, Mr...?
Bond. James Bond.

Special Agent 007, James Bond is the star agent of MI6. Always cool under pressure and licensed to kill, James is sent to infiltrate enemy organizations and destroy them from the inside. Over the decades, James Bond has gone from serious to campy and back again, but always manages to get the job done through wit, physical ability and superior equipment.
Bond generally wields a sidearm with lethal efficiency, along with a number of incredible gadgets developed by the geniuses at Q Branch. With his remarkable physical ability and ever-changing bag of tools, there isn't an international crime organization that Bond has failed to take down. The only thing that could possible distract Bond are his own vices: women or booze, both of which have gotten one over on him in the past.
James Bond Respect Threads by Actor
Sean Connery- 1962 to 1967, once more in 1971. Physically strong, numerous gadgets disguised as everyday items. Adept in traditional spy skills, like infiltration and observation.
George Lazenby- Once in 1969. Very similar to Connery in his craftiness, skilled specifically in winter sports.
Roger Moore- 1973 to 1985. Downright campy, making use of almost cartoonish skills that actually work in-universe. Skilled driver and pilot with a variety of gadgets.
Timothy Dalton- 1987 to 1989. Colder and more quick to become violent than the others. Usually carries a firearm and a lethal gadget to kill enemies.
Pierce Brosnan- 1995 to 2002. Best variety of gadgets of any Bond. Great feats of endurance and athletic ability.
Daniel Craig- 2006 to 2021. The most realistic Bond, yet has some of the most impressive physical abilities in any of the movies. Low variety of gadgets, but excels in gunfights.
Hover over a feat to see the film it’s from. Additionally, the name of any gif on Gfycat contains the last name of the actor that accomplished it.

Physicals

You have a nasty habit of surviving.
Well, you know what they say about the fittest.

Strength
Striking

• Breaks a wooden board with a downward strike
• Tackles a man through two bathroom stalls
• Barrels through a temporary construction wall
• Punches through drywall and wood to access a hidden room

Lifting/Throwing

• Picks up and throws a chair at a man, knocking him out
• Fights off an attacker with a couch
• Picks up and slides a man across a table
• Tosses a chain onto a low-flying helicopter to cause it to crash
• Holds a man above a ledge by the hair

Grip

• When he’s held underwater by two women, Bond surfaces and holds both of them underwater with one hand each
• Holds onto a small plane while the pilot tries to shake him off
• Catches a rope on a blimp and holds on even after it rises high into the air
• Holds onto the top of a speeding car, even when the driver attempts to shake him off
• Avoids falling out of a plane’s airlock by grabbing onto some netting
• Holds onto the outside of a moving seaplane, even after the pilot attempts to shake him off
• Holds onto the bottom of an elevator car as it rises up a skyscraper

Pushing

• With one other guy, Bond rolls this large concrete column
• Knocks over a large bookshelf

Other

• After being buried in snow by an avalanche, Bond climbs out and is relatively okay about a minute later
• Wrestles with a large constricting snake before killing it with a poison injector

Endurance
Blunt Force

• Keeps fighting after getting a wooden chair broken over his back
• Stays conscious after strikes from Oddjob
  • Oddjob RT
• Fights on through hits with a fireplace poker
• Jumps from a bridge to a passing boat, falling through the roof and onto a wedding cake
• While hanging onto a blimp, he’s smacked into the Golden Gate Bridge and quickly starts climbing up
• He’s knocked down a ladder, but recovers by the time he gets to the bottom rung
• Continues fighting Stamper after a number of blows to the face
• Falls from a low hot air balloon onto a domed structure, and he recovers by grabbing some nearby cables
  • Bond suffered a dislocated collarbone after this fall, however
• When jumping off a low crane, Bond stumbles, falling into a metal air vent. He’s up and running moments later.
• Recieves cock and ball torture by Le Chiffre’s rope, at first barely responding, then laughing in his torturer’s face
• Falls one or two stories onto the top of a bus, but gets up quickly
• Fights on after being hit across the back with a metal pipe four times
• Keeps fighting through repeated strikes from Hinx, like getting thrown into walls or getting thrown through thin walls
  • Mr. Hinx Respect Thread found here
• [Limit] Has a recurring weakness to blunt force trauma to the back of the head

Piercing/Cutting

• Keeps running despite being shot in the calf
  • He’s later seen patching up his calf in the bathroom, so he was definitely hit by a bullet
• Keeps fighting after being cut across the chest and being shot up by a nail gun
• Gets shot in the shoulder by a handgun, but operates mostly unimpeded

Other

• Resists being garroted long enough to grab a knife, stabbing his attacker and turning the garrote wire back on him
• Takes over 12 Gs of force before destroying the machine with an armor-piercing dart
  • Real-life astronauts are typically trained to withstand up to 9 Gs of force.
• Gets electrocuted with a gauntlet that can output 100,000 volts, which leaves him writhing in pain but conscious
  • Scene describing the electrical weapon, where the 100,000 volt figure is from
• Bond is shot by a sniper rifle and falls off a high bridge into water. After three months, Bond is mostly physically able again, although his aim is more noticeably affected.
• Endures having a small surgical drill bore into the back of his skull and into the part of the brain that deals with recognition, seemingly to no negative neurological effect

Agility
Movement

• Chases down an assassin, tackling him
• Takes a running jump up to a rising platform
• Catches up to an aircraft taking off on the runway
• Runs and jumps into a closing metal door
• Catches up to an airplane during takeoff, jumping into the plane through the landing gear
• Catches up to a fleeing truck on a runway, although it obviously hasn’t accelerated to full speed
• Escapes a CIA squad with just a moment's warning
• Runs away from a fireball caused by a house-sized explosion

Reflexes

• While on the ground, he dodges katana swings
• Dodges a thrown knife, then pulls it out of the wood behind him to kill the assassin
• Dodges a dune buggy at close range
• Evades shotgun fire from a pursuer
• Evades rifle fire, then shoots the enemy gunman
• Evades handgun fire with a roll, then avoids some distant machine gun fire
• Dodges a harpoon underwater
• When a man attempts to shoot Bond’s knees from nearly point blank range, Bond moves his legs to avoid the shots
• Uses an enemy to block gunfire
• While sitting in the passenger seat, Bond grabs the driver’s arm before they can shoot him
• Rolls away from an incendiary grenade’s detonation moments after noticing it

Combat Skill

Problem solver?
More of a problem eliminator.

Unarmed Combat
Quick Knock Outs

• Judo flips an attacker, then punches him
• Dispatches a guard with a neck strike
• Silently KOs a man, then steals his equipment to blend in with a scuba crew
• KOs a guard with a judo chop
• Stealthily KOs a guard from behind cover
• Knocks a man out with one kick to the head
• Ends an attempted fistfight with an elbow and then slamming the man on a table
• Knocks out a man by slamming him into the walls of an elevator twice
• Punches a guy out in two strikes
• Consistently one-punches goons
• From a sprint, Bond jumps and kicks a man in the face to knock him out

Against Individuals

• Breaks a hold from behind by a man who wrestles alligators
• Fights evenly with Grant in a train car, with both men getting in hits before Grant begins garroting Bond with a concealed wire
  • Grant is a trained Russian assassin who no-sells strikes to the stomach with brass knuckles
• Sweeps Pussy Galore to the floor, then reverses her judo throw attempt
• Wrestles with Hans before flipping him into a piranha pond
• Flips a man with judo throws twice
• Defeats a strong, tough guy in the hotel
• Has an awesome fistfight with a heavyset henchman, ending with Bond punching him off a rooftop
• Fights an assassin while dangling outside of a moving plane
• Has an extended fistfight with Alec Trevylyn, former agent 006, ending with Alec grabbing a handgun to hold Bond at gunpoint
• During a fight, he breaks a man’s arm, then punches him off a ledge
• Brawls with a martial artist on the outside of a crane

Against Multiple Attackers

• Knocks out six men when fleeing on a rooftop
• Starts thrashing technicians until one pulls a gun
• Defeats four guards in hand-to-hand combat
• Knocks out two attackers who ambushed him
• Drops about four men in a bar fight
• While handcuffed, Bond knocks out four surrounding MI6 agents in an elevator
• Drops two guards with one strike each

Against Armed Attackers

• Kicks away a gunman's gun, then beats him up in the ocean
• Disarms an armed woman with one hand
• While unarmed, Bond fights with a knife-wielding villain, with Bond disarming him and tackling him into water
• Disarms a woman and puts her in a painful armhold
• Disarms a gunman and knocks him down some stairs
• Has an extended fight with a man with a machete while in a confined space. Bond himself was unarmed, although he did ball up his jacket to block some strikes.
• Takes out a CIA riot officer with an elbow to the face
• While completely unarmed, defeats a man wielding an axe, even tricking him into slicing his own foot
• Brawls with an assassin armed with a sniper rifle before dropping him out of a skyscraper
• Intentionally breaks the ice on a frozen lake to bring a gunman down into the water, then Bond chokes him to death with his leg

With Weapons
Blades

• Kills a man with his own knife in one maneuver
• In just a few moves, Bond defeats a henchman in a machete fight, throwing him into a container full of snakes
• Steals a man’s knife, then pins his tie to a nearby counter
• Swordfights with a trained fencer, eventually switching to broadswords, where Bond draws first blood from the torso
• While being held at knifepoint, Bond turns and kills the man with his own knife after a struggle

Blunt Objects

• Breaks a man’s neck with a fireplace poker
• Disarms a diver, then uses the harpoon gun to shatter their goggles
• Using an oar, Bond fights off a man with a large hook
• Uses a ski to knock a man off of a cliff, then kills another man after a struggle
• While unarmed, Bond is attacked by an assassin with a knife, but manages to kill the assassin with a pair of scissors
• Spots an attacker in the reflection of a bronze decoration, then uses the decoration to bludgeon them
• Fights off four men who were beating him with a bat moments before, making heavy use of furniture and blunt items

Unorthodox Items

• Defeats three men in the confined space of a cockpit
• Throws flammable alcohol onto an assassin, igniting him
• Beats down a guard with a door, then five strikes
• Takes out two motorcycle-riding assassins with a long plank of wood
• Uses a ski pole to set a trap for a motorbike-riding assassin
• Knocks out a prison guard while handcuffed, at one point using the cuffs on the man's face
• Defeats two men in a crumbling building, using exposed wiring and a nail gun to dispatch them

Environment Focused

• Brawls with an assassin in a hotel room before throwing him into a bathtub and knocking a fan into the water, electrocuting him
• Kills Oddjob by using exposed electrical wiring on a metal cage that Oddjob was touching
• Tricks Jaws into hitting a wood column, knocking a wooden structure over himself
• Brawls with Jaws atop a cable car
• Fights off three hockey player assassins in a hockey rink, taking one out with the zamboni
• Judo throws a goon onto a bed of spikes
• While pinned to a wooden door by knives, he opens the door and kills an assassin with one of the knives
• Smacks a henchman with a plane’s antenna, throwing him off the plane
• Tosses maggots at a gunman, then knocks him out and judo throws him into the maggots
• Bond drags a guard into water and drowns him
• Bond ties a rope around Mr. Hinx’s neck and attaches it to a weight, then kicks that weight off the train to pull Hinx away

Accuracy

You wouldn’t kill me. You’d miss me.
I never miss.

Pistols

• Grabs Goldfinger’s gun and fires on an airplane window, sucking the villain out of the plane
• Shoots a gunman despite their being behind a column for cover
• Right after waking up, he shoots a ninja in the dark
• Poses as a wax figure and shoots Scaramanga
• Shoots three soldiers with his Walther P5, two of them being headshots
• Accurately hits a gunman from a moving speedboat
• Shoots a gunman through a wooden floor
• Uses a human shield to block bullets, then returns fire, killing a gunman
• Turns and fires on a man before he can fire
• Shoots a man while hanging upside-down by the leg
• Disarms and shoots two policemen
• Disarms the man holding him at gunpoint, then kills four other armed men in seconds
• Shoots two fire extinguishers to obscure the room and allow hostages to safely escape
• While handcuffed and at gunpoint, Bond steals the gun to shoot his captors

Against Vehicles

• Uses the Walther PPK to shoot out a dune buggy’s front tire
• Fires a Taurus PT92 into the engine of an oncoming Jeep, disabling it
• From a speedboat, Bond accurately hits a helicopter’s engine enough with a handgun to cause it to crash

Rifles/Submachine Guns

• Using a sniper rifle, Bond shoots a man in a helicopter, causing him to drop his grenade inside
• Fires a rifle, killing three goons, while sliding down a bannister
• Kills at least 8 men with a submachine gun in a short timeframe
• Turns around and shoots a gunman before he can kill his hostage. Note that Bond turns and fires right after the gunman receives orders to kill the hostage.
• Spots a sneaking soldier dressed in black and kills him with a rifle
• Fires on a guard before the guard can fire his weapon
• From a speeding hovercraft, Bond hits small land mines to detonate them on his pursuers
• Uses a Sa vz. 58 Compact to escape Blofeld’s facility, killing nearly a dozen guards, even at extreme range

Other Firearms

• Turns and immediately shoots a harpoon gun, killing a stealthy assassin
• Takes out a distant sniper by firing a shotgun
• Accurately shoots a sniper’s rifle with his own, rather than kill her
• Escapes a crowd of divers by stealing a harpoon gun and firing it into a nearby seaplane, pulling himself away

Non-Firearm Accuracy

• Throws three scalpels into a man’s arm and chest
• Throws a knife into a specific date on a calendar from across a room
• When the auto-targeting system fails, Bond manually shoots down a capsule full of viruses with a laser cannon
• Kills a man with a climbing spike

Other Skills

I always enjoyed learning a new tongue.
You always were a cunning linguist, James.

Athletics

• Dives off an oil rig into the ocean below
• Avoids machine gun fire while skiing
• Continues skiing after losing a ski
• While skiing, Bond jumps and twists to smack two gunmen with his skis
• Goes rock climbing on a nearly vertical rock wall
• Temporarily outswims the pull of an industrial fan before destroying it with his air tank
• Performs a HALO jump into water, then immediately begins scuba diving
• Swims outside of a submarine, scaling the surface until he can re-enter the vessel on the other side. He had to hold his breath for almost two minutes while scaling the outside of the submarine.
• Infiltrates North Korea by simply surfing onto the coast of the country
• Parasurfs off a collapsing iceberg
• Leaps from a crashing plane, catching up to his partner and using her parachute to save them both

Driving/Piloting
Driving

• Weaves around a parking lot, causing a dozen cop cars to crash into themselves, walls or parked cars
• Briefly drives on two wheels to slip through a narrow alley
• Drifts a double decker bus, causing a couple cops to crash their motorcycles
• Jumps over a river in a car using a broken bridge as a ramp
• While driving, he knocks over barrels onto enemies, then drives on two wheels to block bullets
• Drives a car over a ramp, onto a bus, then back to ground level

Piloting Aircraft

• Picks up a villain's wheelchair with a helicopter, then drops him into a smokestack
• Avoids a heat-seeking missile while piloting a small plane, redirecting it into an enemy hangar
• Dodges a stinger missile by driving a semi-truck on only the left hand wheels
• Starts a helicopter in midair and lands safely
• While flying a much less maneuverable plane, Bond tricks a fighter jet into crashing into a mountainside by producing smoke from a damaged engine
• Ejects a pilot from a helicopter, then pulls the helicopter out of freefall

Other

• Jumps a speedboat over a small patch of land
• Drifts a tank, then drives through a building to cause untold property damage

Traversal

• Performs a front flip off a ledge
• Traverses a ski lift wire with nothing more than a pair of mittens
• Traverses the underside of an oil rig by swinging on a rope, then walking a tightrope
• Jumps on the back of a couple alligators to escape a swamp
• Swings on vines like Tarzan to escape pursuers
• Traverses the side of a moving train
• Uses a long pole to safely travel down a building, then releases the pole to smack a pursuing officer
• Performs a combat roll down stairs to avoid handgun fire
• Runs up a crane to reach the top of a building under construction
• Climbs up a vertical I-beam
• From the top of a moving truck, Bond runs and flips through the open windshield
• Jumps down a story onto stone, rolling to avoid impact damage

Stealth

• Uses a hollow reed to hide underwater from guards and dogs
• Hides in plain sight by pretending to be making out, but it’s actually just his own arms wrapped around himself
• Evades a crowd of police
• Lowers his heart rate to trick medical staff and an EKG, then dispatches the staff and escapes the hospital
• Broke into M’s house to use her computer

Other

• [Observation] Notices an attacker in the reflection of a woman’s eye, then uses her as a human shield to block a strike
• [Foreign Language] Learned several Asian languages at Cambridge
• [Alcoholism] Can tell the temperature of alcohol after one sip
• [Deception] Poses as a genealogist under the pseudonym Sir Hillary Bray. After a few days, Blofeld sees through the ruse and has Bond captured.
• [Underwater] Ties a boat to a large rock with the rope he’s bound in, causing the boat to break the rope, freeing Bond
• [Sleight of Hand] Switches out a priceless Faberge egg for a fake copy
• [Animal Commanding] Commands a wild tiger to sit, and it actually listens
• [Gambling] Wins a quarter of a million dollars at a high stakes gambling table
• [Invention] Descends a tall building with some rope and an unconscious body
• [Seduction] Seduces a married woman to learn more about her husband’s criminal activity
• [Preparation] Puts shotgun shells under the floorboards in order to fire on intruders when they step on them
• [Observation] Identifies a hidden door based on a tiny sliver of light through the crack

Equipment

Right, now pay attention 007. I want you to take great care of this equipment. There are one or two rather special accessories.
Q, have I ever let you down?
Frequently.

Weapons
Firearms

• Carries a Walther PPK, a discreet pistol with excellent stopping power
• A collapsible Armalite AR-7 sniper rifle with an infrared sight, allowing for use in the dark
• Bond carries a S&W model 29 revolver in early Moore films, then later switches to his iconic Walther PPK, then, finally, uses the Walther P5
• Carries a very small firearm, the Beretta 950 Jetfire
• Has a firearm disguised as a camera. Additionally, the device is programmed to Bond’s own palm signature, meaning only he can fire the weapon.
  • The camera gun can be outfitted with a scope and tripod for long range fire
• A suppressed UMP-9, used to fire on Mr. White’s leg at range
• A Walther PPK with a palm-print sensor coded to Bond’s hand, meaning only he can fire it
  • Sure enough, when someone else tries to use it, it just doesn’t fire
• A heavily modified Glock 17, with laser sight and microphone attachment

Other

• A combat knife
• A projectile launcher disguised as a cigarette, gifted to Bond by a ninja master
• A grenade disguised as a ballpoint pen
  • By tossing the grenade pen into a pool of fuel, an explosion and destructive fire is formed
• A grenade disguised as a lighter
• A flashbang explosive disguised as a handgun, used to stun three gunmen, allowing Bond to dispatch them

Gadgets
Mobility

• A grappling gun and cord that attaches to his pants, allowing him to scale the outside of a skyscraper
  • Can be outfitted with metal projectiles and used as a firearm instead
• Briefly wore a ninja outfit with suction cups on the palms and knees, used to scale down metal walls
• Flies away from a fight with a jetpack
• A belt with a hidden high-tensile cord, enough to support Bond’s own weight
  • Using the belt cord, Bond swings Spider-Man-style across a room and out a window

Reconnaissance/Infiltration

• A small explosive, used to blow a lock off a cell door
• Has a small safe-cracking device disguised as a cigarette case
• Special glasses to see through tinted glass
• Photocopier disguised as a checkbook
• A digital skeleton key disguised as a gift card
• Binoculars built into a pair of glasses
• Sunglasses with built in X-ray vision, allowing Bond to detect concealed weapons and see through women’s clothing
• A powerful camera, used to identify the faces of high profile criminals with just a few pixels
• A cell phone that acts as a fingerprint scanner, a powerful taser and as a remote control for a BMW

Continued in Comments

Company Name	Title	City
HelioHire	Data Science Analyst	Austin
HCSC	IT Policy Manager	Richardson
HCSC	ARIS Modeler	Richardson
HCSC	VP of Pharmacy	Richardson
Southwest Research Institute	Associate Specialist - Specialist - Purchasing - Services Group	San Antonio
Southwest Research Institute	Specialist - Sr. Specialist - Internal Audit	San Antonio
Southwest Research Institute	Specialist - Sr. Specialist - Cost Accounting	San Antonio
Aveanna Healthcare	Aveanna Healthcare Private Duty Nurse RN	Addison
Northwest Texas Healthcare System	Surgery Aide	AMARILLO
BSA Hospital	CT Tech	Amarillo
BSA Hospital	Nuclear Med Tech	Amarillo
L3Harris Technologies	Software Engineering Lead	Anna
L3Harris Technologies	Software Engineering Manager	Anna
L3Harris Technologies	Lead, Systems Engineering	Anna
Aveanna Healthcare	School Case - RN Home Health Private Duty	Arlington
Westdale Asset Management	Network Operations Center (NOC) Technician	Arlington
Aveanna Healthcare	Aveanna Healthcare Private Duty Nurse RN	Baytown
Aveanna Healthcare	Occupational Therapist (OT)- $5,000 Sign on bonus!	Beaumont
Howell Furniture	Sales Representative	Beaumont
Aveanna Healthcare	Bilingual Speech Language Pathologist SLP- $5000 Sign on Bonus	Beaumont
Aveanna Healthcare	Aveanna Healthcare Private Duty Nurse RN - Nights	Brenham
Aveanna Healthcare	Aveanna Healthcare Private Duty Nurse RN	Burleson
Aveanna Healthcare	Aveanna Healthcare Private Duty Nurse RN	Burton
Corralito Steak House	Urgently Hiring Bartender	Canutillo
Avis Budget Group	Calling all Sales Professionals!!	Canutillo

Hey guys, here are some recent job openings , feel free to comment here if you have any questions, I'm at the community's disposal! If you encounter any problems with any of these job openings please let me know that I will modify the table accordingly. Thanks!

How to Build an Impressive Resume in 2023: Tips and Tricks
Building an impressive resume is a crucial step in securing your dream job. In today's competitive job market, having a well-crafted resume can make all the difference. A resume serves as your introduction to potential employers, highlighting your skills, qualifications, and experiences. In this article, we will provide you with valuable tips and tricks to help you create an outstanding resume that stands out from the crowd.
Introduction
In the fast-paced world of 2023, the job search process has evolved significantly. Employers receive hundreds of resumes for each job opening, making it essential to make your application stand out. An impressive resume not only showcases your qualifications but also demonstrates your professionalism and suitability for the role. Let's dive into the key elements that will make your resume shine.
The Importance of a Well-Crafted Resume
A well-crafted resume is your ticket to securing job interviews. It acts as your personal marketing tool, presenting your skills, experiences, and achievements to potential employers. A compelling resume helps you make a positive first impression and sets you apart from other candidates. It should effectively communicate your qualifications and convince employers that you are the ideal fit for the role.
Understanding the Hiring Process in 2023
Before diving into resume building tips, it's crucial to understand the modern hiring process. Many companies now use applicant tracking systems (ATS) to streamline the screening process. ATS scans resumes for specific keywords and filters out those that don't meet the criteria. Therefore, tailoring your resume to match the job description is essential to increase your chances of getting noticed.
Key Elements of an Impressive Resume

1. Contact Information: Include your name, phone number, email address, and LinkedIn profile (if applicable). Make sure your contact details are up to date and easily accessible.
   
2. Professional Summary/Objective: Craft a concise and impactful summary that highlights your key qualifications and career goals.
   
3. Work Experience: List your previous work experience in reverse chronological order, emphasizing relevant positions and achievements.
   
4. Education: Mention your educational background, including degrees, certifications, and relevant coursework.
   
5. Skills: Showcase your relevant skills, both technical and soft, that align with the job requirements.
   
6. Achievements and Awards: Highlight any notable achievements or awards that demonstrate your capabilities and dedication.
   
7. Certifications and Training: Include any certifications or training programs that enhance your qualifications for the desired role.
   
8. References: Optionally provide references or state that they are available upon request.
   

Formatting and Design Tips
To make your resume visually appealing and easy to read, consider the following tips:

1. Choose a Clean and Professional Layout: Opt for a simple and modern layout that allows your content to stand out.
   
2. Use Appropriate Fonts and Font Sizes: Stick to standard fonts like Arial, Calibri, or Times New Roman in a readable size (10-12 points).
   
3. Organize Sections with Headings and Subheadings: Use clear headings and subheadings to divide your resume into easily navigable sections.
   
4. Utilize Bulleted Lists and Consistent Formatting: Use bullet points to highlight key responsibilities and achievements. Maintain consistent formatting throughout your resume.
   

Tailoring Your Resume to the Job
Each job application is unique, and tailoring your resume to match the specific requirements is crucial. Analyze the job description and identify the key skills, experiences, and qualifications the employer is seeking. Then, customize your resume to emphasize the most relevant information that aligns with the job requirements. This will demonstrate your suitability and increase your chances of being selected for an interview.
Keywords and ATS Optimization
In today's digital age, keywords play a vital role in resume optimization. Here are some tips to ensure your resume gets past the ATS:

1. Research Industry-Specific Keywords: Identify relevant keywords by researching the industry and job position you're targeting.
   
2. Incorporate Keywords Throughout Your Resume: Integrate these keywords naturally into your resume's content, including the summary, skills, and work experience sections.
   
3. Understanding Applicant Tracking Systems (ATS): Familiarize yourself with how ATS works and how it scans and filters resumes.
   
4. Formatting Your Resume for ATS Compatibility: Use standard fonts, avoid graphics or complex formatting, and save your resume in a compatible file format (e.g., PDF or Word) to ensure proper parsing by ATS.
   

Showcasing Achievements and Results
To make your resume more impactful, focus on highlighting your achievements and results:

1. Quantify Your Accomplishments: Whenever possible, use numbers, percentages, or other quantifiable metrics to showcase your accomplishments.
   
2. Focus on Impact and Results: Describe how your actions and contributions made a positive impact on previous employers or projects.
   
3. Use Action Verbs to Describe Responsibilities: Begin bullet points with action verbs to convey your responsibilities and achievements more effectively.
   

Highlighting Transferable Skills
Transferable skills are valuable assets that can be applied across various roles and industries. Emphasize your transferable skills to demonstrate your versatility and adaptability. Skills like communication, problem-solving, teamwork, and leadership are highly sought after by employers.
Proofreading and Editing
To ensure your resume is error-free and professional:

1. Proofread Carefully: Check for grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors. Read your resume aloud or ask someone else to review it for you.
   
2. Edit for Clarity and Conciseness: Eliminate any unnecessary or repetitive information and focus on conveying your qualifications concisely.
   

Seeking Feedback and Professional Assistance
Getting feedback from others can provide valuable insights into areas for improvement. Share your resume with trusted friends, mentors, or professionals in your field to gather feedback and suggestions for enhancement. Additionally, consider seeking assistance from professional resume writers who specialize in crafting compelling resumes.
Online Resources for Resume Building
Take advantage of online resources that can aid you in building an impressive resume. Websites, career blogs, and professional networking platforms offer valuable tips, templates, and examples that can guide you through the resume creation process. Leverage these resources to ensure your resume is up to date with the latest industry trends and best practices.
Top 5 online Resources for Resume Building:

1. LinkedIn: LinkedIn is a powerful professional networking platform that offers more than just networking opportunities. It provides a range of resources for resume building, including resume templates, tips, and examples. You can also showcase your skills, experiences, and achievements on your LinkedIn profile, making it a great platform for employers to discover your talents.
   
2. CV-Library: CV-Library is a popular job board that not only allows you to search for job opportunities but also provides a dedicated section for resume building. It offers a variety of resume templates and samples across different industries and professions. Additionally, CV-Library offers expert advice on creating an effective resume that stands out to employers.
   
3. MyPerfectResume: MyPerfectResume is an online resume builder that offers a user-friendly interface and a wide range of customizable resume templates. It provides step-by-step guidance in creating a professional resume tailored to your industry and career level. MyPerfectResume also offers additional features like cover letter building and interview preparation resources.
   
4. CareerOneStop: CareerOneStop, sponsored by the U.S. Department of Labor, is a comprehensive career development website that offers various tools and resources, including a resume guide. It provides tips on resume writing, formatting, and content organization. CareerOneStop also offers a resume builder tool that allows you to create and download your resume in different formats.
   
5. Novorésumé: Novorésumé is an online platform that offers visually appealing and modern resume templates. It provides a simple and intuitive interface for building and customizing your resume. Novorésumé also offers valuable content and tips on resume writing, cover letters, and job search strategies to help you stand out in today's competitive job market.
   

Remember to choose the online resource that aligns with your specific needs and preferences. These platforms can provide valuable guidance, templates, and examples to help you create a professional and impressive resume.
Keeping Up with the Latest Trends
The job market is constantly evolving, and it's essential to stay updated with the latest trends. Keep an eye on industry-specific advancements, new technologies, and emerging skills that are in high demand. Stay proactive in your career development to ensure your resume remains relevant and competitive.
Conclusion
Crafting an impressive resume requires careful consideration and attention to detail. By following the tips and tricks outlined in this article, you can create a standout resume that catches the attention of potential employers. Remember to tailor your resume to each job application, optimize it for applicant tracking systems, and showcase your achievements and transferable skills. With a compelling resume in hand, you'll be well-equipped to navigate the job search process in 2023 and land your desired role.
FAQs

1. Should I include a cover letter along with my resume? Including a cover letter is recommended as it allows you to introduce yourself and express your interest in the position. It provides an opportunity to highlight specific qualifications and tailor your application to the company's needs.
   
2. Is it necessary to limit my resume to one page? While it's ideal to keep your resume concise, there's no strict rule about limiting it to one page. Focus on including relevant information and ensuring readability. If you have extensive experience or qualifications, a two-page resume may be acceptable.
   
3. Should I include references on my resume? Unless specifically requested, it's not necessary to include references on your resume. Instead, mention that references are available upon request. Be prepared to provide references when requested during the later stages of the hiring process.
   
4. Can I use a creative or unconventional resume format? While creative formats can be eye-catching, it's essential to strike a balance between creativity and professionalism. If you're applying for a creative role, a unique format may be more suitable. However, for most industries, it's best to stick to a clean and professional format that prioritizes clarity and readability.
   
5. How often should I update my resume? It's a good practice to update your resume regularly, especially when you acquire new skills, complete significant projects, or change job positions. Keeping your resume up to date ensures that you're prepared for new opportunities that may arise at any time.
   

So pretty much every time I load in with quick resume objects, cars and npc's go luke an unshaded glitch white
Every time I use quick load the gliching gets worse and worse until I have to reset the game

Hey Hey Hey buds. We are back at it again with the Alien ER. how was your week? I hope it was good. This week we have our first glimpses of what Martinez's combat experiences were like, i do mean a literal glimpse. I have a couple of chapters to really drive home the day's events in detail later on. We also have shiksie breaking out of her shell a bit today, and get some more insight into how she treats people.
anyways let's get this bread.
---------
Regrettably for Martinez, walking Lysa back to her home would be the last part of his night he would describe as enjoyable in any way. By the time he made it back home, it was well past two in the morning; the few hours of sleep he did manage to get were restless and filled with memories he would rather forget. The events of the night had whipped him back years in his life.
Usually, Martinez would not get night terrors anymore, but they still on occasion reared their ghoulish head. Thankfully Martinez was not able to vividly recall the nightmares from today, but he knows he had them because he woke up in a cold sweat. Whenever they are vivid he feels like garbage for days afterward; He becomes little more than a writhing mass of anxiety and regret wishing if anything he could go back and change what happened. The faces of his brothers contorting and twisting in agony were seared into his mind and soul, the vivid dreams were him going through those events over and over again, as if the grim reaper was showing him a horror movie of his past.
He had been to therapy for years trying to eventually move past the memories of what happened on Verilon. The therapy did help for a while, but eventually, he stagnated and stopped going; he could not accept that he was the only one left, He could not move forward; so he just did his best to keep going on living with the memories, his brother's deaths held tightly on his soul, like a ball and chain.
He still hated that the lowest moment of his life was what the Navy decided was what he should be rewarded for. That bright gold cross on his dress blues was nothing he was proud of, it was just a bitter reminder of his failures; He thought it might as well be a cruel joke life had for him.
The last time he had thought about Verilon was a few months before he arrived here on Draun; He had heard through the grapevine that his old unit was getting ready to start building up to redeploy there. He was glad he was reassigned so he did not have to return to that hell-blasted desert world. He had his turn in the sandbox, it was someone else's chase to spend a year there.
After having woken up three separate times throughout the night, Martinez had given up on getting any sleep at all. He only had two hours left until he had to go to work anyways, the few hours of sleep would not make a difference to his well-being anyways.
He took to answering some of the questions Shiksie had given him, but focusing on the intricate details of alien anatomy while completely lacking sleep was not easy by any means, the words on the datapad were twisting and blurring into one another. Before he knew where the time went, the shrill beeping of his alarm clock had already started to fill the apartment.
As he idly went and got ready for the day, he was glad he did not try to get Lysa to stay the night. He would have hated her to see him like this, he would rather no one see him like this at all. The fact he felt this made him feel broken, and to him, a woman he had only been on one date with would certainly think the same. Sometimes life has a funny way of working out, he supposed.
Halfway stumbling into work with a yawn Martinez could not wait for the day to be over, he was planning on just going through the motions and doing his best to keep Shiksie off his back. He set himself up in his usual corner and started to read from the datapad; In all of Martinez’s experience if you looked busy, or at least looked like you were doing what those over you wanted, they would likely leave you alone.
Surprisingly the one who threw a wrench into that plan was Therin. The small avian alien had spotted Martinez as soon as he entered and scooted his chair nearby. Therin tapped Martinez on the thigh.
“So how was your night?” Therin chirped. Hoping his little ploy from the previous night worked out well. They were busy at the shop last night and he was about to leave when the police called, but the cop mentioned Martinez and his Aviex girlfriend were on a date; He just could not help himself to mess with the new guy and maybe push him towards spending some more time with someone other than Shiksie, or Ivorn.
You would know how it went you little shit, Marinez thought as he tucked the datapad back into his scrubs pocket and then turned towards his co-worker
Therin looked at Martinez, his feathers slightly puffed up. He stood on the chair and got slightly closer to Martinez Intently looking Martinez over. Therin took particular interest in the small circle of healing puncture wounds on his Human compatriot's shoulder. “What did your lady friend do to you?” He asked jokingly.
“Therin you already know what happened, I got into a fight” Martinez grumbled. Not wanting to have the prodding bird ask further into the rest of the evening. He already knew that Aveix, where hated and did not doubt Therin knowing about him and Lysa’s more intimate time, would be trouble.
“Oh come on new guy, I'm asking about after I was on the phone with the cops” Therin replied, “Did you have a nice evening?”
Martinez stepped slightly away from Therin. “Look man, I had a long night. Nothing happened after the fight” Martinez groaned
Therin shook his head and tapped his wing claw on Martinez’s shoulder. “Those little marks I can see tell me otherwise” he chirped
Dammit, I was hoping those were not visible, Martinez thought. Martinez had always worn slightly larger scrubs than he needed to out of comfort, he did not make much effort to hide the bite mark on his trap, but it's not like it's anyone else's business who he goes on a date with anyways.
“I mean it, nothing else happened,” Martinez growled. Hoping Therin would get the hint and drop the subject.
“Oh yeah, whatever you say new guy” Therin chuckled “So when is the wedding?”
“Fuck off Therin,” Martinez said jokingly, pushing Therins chair away from him with his boot “Don’t you have something better to be doing?”
Therin chuckled a little, before scooting his chair back towards the center desks of the room “Wow you really are Shiksies trainee, you are already acting just like her'' He said before tapping his wing claw on his datapad. Therin wondered what else he might be able to do to mess with Martinez about the events of last night, when he opened the list of current patients he saw his answer.
The bird has more jokes than I thought he would Martinez thought, while pulling back out his data pad. At least Therin was a good sport about who he went out with, unlike those two Urintal did. The fact Therin was giving him a little bit of shit wasn’t surprising, It was in a way customary for the old salts to poke fun at the new guy's love life. At this point, Therin was the only one who knew he had gone on a date at all, and he hoped it stayed that way at least with Skiksie; If Ivorn figured it out, Martinez doubted he would care much; Martinez had already met Ivorns chipper girlfriend at his point.
I should get back to studying before Shiksie shows up, Martinez thought as he buttoned his top up a bit higher than he preferred. Martinez did not want the others to see the hickey or dig any more into his private life than he was comfortable with.
—
Shiksie arrived at work excited, she was eager to see what Martinez had managed to study during his time away from work; She had given him what she saw as a small number of questions and things he should have been studying over the weekend. She had always done her best learning when she had a nice calm place to read, at least the new Human hopefully had that allotted to him at his own home.
If he did a good job answering what she had given him, she would hopefully be able to increase the rate of his training; She had no idea how long he was going to be here but she wanted to get Martinez certified as a basic Interspecies technician as soon as possible; Getting Martinez that certification would be a great boon for the shop, she and the others could then allow him to assess class green patients without their oversight.
When she entered, something was off in the shop. She could hear Therin and Ivorn chatting happily about their weekends, but the place smelled horrible. A rancid combination of stem cells, iron, pine, the same strange scent Martinez gave off when she knew he was agitated. She initially assumed Martinez just had forgotten to wear his scent suppressors, but when she rounded the corner and saw the massive gash and pink hemostatic gel on the human's face she knew something was definitely off.
Getting closer to Martinez, Shiksie was still nervous about being around him; She felt slight twinges of fear of him striking at her, or her overstepping and boundaries she had yet to learn. While they had managed to build a shaky but cordial relationship at best, she would rather not jeopardize what they do have.
The Human smelled like he had when they had their meeting, along with his heart pounding extremely quickly.
Is he nervous about something? Shiksie thought as she made it next to him, once again without him noticing. She wondered if she should stop sneaking around him, but she would rather not bother the Human whenever she could. Assuming her mere presence was more often than not a bother to the man.
She peered over his shoulder to catch a glance at what he was currently studying. It surprised her, he had quite a few tabs open on the datapad, but the current one was her list of questions. Most of them had not been answered, but he was flicking back and forth between the list and the other tabs searching for answers.
Shicksie could not help but feel her tail sway a bit faster, the fact that he was doing what she asked was certainly progress in repairing their abysmal start to working together. She walked past him, and headed towards her desk; With the human still not having noticed her entrance.
Shiksie decided to not dig into whatever had Martinez on edge, even if she was worried that it has him so unsettled. She assumed if Martinez wanted to talk to her about it, he would do so; most species did that after all, and humans were supposed to be rather social; even if Martinez seemed a bit more… reserved, he was still Human at the end of the day.
Later in the Morning Dr. Harnsis arrived and the crew had their pass down from the night shift regarding any patients that were already in rooms. They only had a Urintal in one of the rooms. He had a broken jaw and dozens of other fractures across the rest of his body. From the briefing, Shiksie knew the Urintal was caught up in some fight the previous night, but with no injuries that were directly life-threatening, He would be perfect practice for Martinez. The Urintal had surgery on his jaw and was still asleep from the heavy painkillers that night shift had pumped into the Lizard-like Alien.
“I will take over the treatment of the Urintal,” Shiksie said, jumping on the chance to treat the patient that was already here. The Urintal were a green species that had been in the Galactic Union for thousands of years. It would be a perfect chance to have Martinez assess a patient and go through the discharge process.
“Very well Shiksie, you, Therin, and Martinez handle that first. The patient should be ready to leave within the hour” Harnsis Chittered as he pointed at the two of them with his larger forelimbs.
Shiksies' ears twitched when Martinez groaned and muttered under his breath. It was rare she mishears someone, but she did not understand why Martinez was muttering he would rather not. She glanced over and saw that therein was patting Martinez on the shoulder reassuring him of something.
What the hell happened? Shiksie thought as she walked toward the two of them.
“Martinez, pull up the patient's charts and their species data; You will be giving myself and Therin a briefing on the species before we go into the room. Do you understand?” Shiksie asked.
Martinez pulled out his datapad, and lazily saluted “I will get it ready” he groaned, before tapping on the screen.
Shifting her attention towards Therin. The bird looked up at her and tilted his head slightly. “What's up Shiksie? Do you need something from me?” Therein chirped.
Shiksie was not sure about what happened but she had to know what she was about to step into. “Yes I do, follow me,” She said flatly before turning around and walking away. Therein following quickly behind.
Once the two of them were well out and away from the center of the shop, far enough that Shiksie was certain Martinez would not hear them. She turned around and knelt in front of Therin. The bird looked at ease like he normally did. Shiksie had never seen anything disturb Therin over the last few years; Therein always just shrugged most issues off, or would on occasion try to pull pranks at others' expense, much to her chagrin. She wanted to make sure the situation was the former and not the latter.
“Therin, does Martinez’s injury have anything to do with that Urintal?” She asked as she leaned her hands on her knees.
Therin fluttered his wings and puffed out his plumage; faking offense to the question. He did not want Shiksie to ruin his chance to see the drug-hazed Urintal being treated by the person who put them in the hospital. He was hoping that Urintal would freak out and try to run away.
“I have no idea, Martinez did not tell me anything at all about what happened,” Therin lied.
Shiksie gave Therin an ice-cold glare that was as sharp as any scalpel. She did not believe the bird at all, he was far too obvious when faking anything. “Therin, I know you are lying. I can hear your heart rate increasing, and I know you aren't afraid of me like Martinez is” Shiksie sighed.
Therin only increased his bolstering refusing to let Shiksie stop his only good joke on the new guy stop before it even started “I mean It, I don't know anything that happened, Why do you assume I know more?”
“Because your pranks are seldom if ever funny, it's clear enough you know more” Shiksie said, tapping her finger on her knee. She looked up behind Therin towards Martinez who was still diligently reading from his datapad, she did not want Martinez to be freaked out and leave. She had caused that with a new trainee once, and Therin once as well. “If anything bad happens to Martinez out of this, I'm holding you accountable, Got it?” She hissed.
Therin backed up and swallowed his spit. He would rather not piss Shiksie off but with the video of Martinez throttling the Urintal he had seen before work. He had no doubt nothing bad would happen to the Human.
“Don't worry Shiksie nothing bad will happen” Therin said.
Shiksie stood towering over Therin, She shook her head. Therin was too stubborn and she knew it, If he wanted a prank to happen it would. No matter how twisted she might think it is. She also wasn’t so stupid as to not pick up on the implied admittance she managed to get out of Therin. “Come on, you are going to be doing this assessment with him after all,” Shiksie said, gesturing towards Martinez.
Shiksie and Therin returned to Martinez as he was finishing his initial reading of the needed information. He initially hoped it was just a coincidence that another Urintal would be here, but once he saw the scans of the patient's bones, he had no doubt his next patient was going to be the man he and Lysa kicked the crap out of the previous night.
He could recall each hit he had seen on the Urintal and was able to point out what ones were his and what ones had to be Lysa’s. The amount of damage was surprising, and the number of fractures was unreal; nearly every rib, and limb had at least one fracture if not more.
Hopefully, this asshole is way too dusted to recognize me, Martinez thought as he looked up at Shiksie and prepared to give the summary of the patient and the Urintal species as a whole.
Shiksie paid close attention to every word Martinez said, Holding tightly onto them. The majority of his summary on the Urintal was accurate; A few mistakes here and there, but he did not have the summary of all the green species memorized as she had. She offered a few corrections but the errors would not affect anything.
Then the summary of the patient's wounds and needed treatment came up, Martinez gripped the datapad tightly and had to periodically pause to take a deep breath. His heart rate would suddenly accelerate. She leaned in closer and got a good view of the Humans dark bark-colored eyes, whenever he paused she saw the vibrant brown was far smaller than normal; He had that same look in his eye from when he took a fighting stance in the storage room with her.
She looked over at Therin, the bird either did not notice how uncomfortable Martinez was or simply did not care. What the hell are you trying, She thought as she started to boil. She was not about to let whatever was going on happen, at first it might have been him trying a prank, but Therins short-sightedness might get the Human or the Urintal hurt.
“Stop,” Shiksie said as she carefully reached her hand out and rested it on Martinez’s shoulder. Martinez recoiled when she touched him, being pulled back from whatever trance he was in. She gently patted his shoulder “Martinez come with me” She said flatly.
Martinez looked up at her sweat rolling off his brow. “Uhh, are you sure? We haven't even seen the patient yet?” he meekly said in protest.
Shiksie had worked with soldiers and police officers enough to know Martinez had some kind of Trauma, and these events were obviously triggering something. The patient can be handled by Therin, while she figures this out. His training be damned, his health came first; even if he likely did not want her to intervene.
“Yes I am sure,” Shiksie purred. She pulled the datapad out of his hands “I need you to come with me now”
She passed the data pad to Therin and glared at the small bird, Therin looked like he was trying to hold back laughter about the state Martinez was in.
I will pluck out your feather you little bird, Shiksie thought. She always thought Therin was a reliable nurse, and a decent friend to have small talk with; but not much else.
“Therin, go ensure the patient gets out of here,” Shiksie said.
Therin looked like he was about to protest the interruption to his idea of a joke, but even Therin did not want to mess with Harnsis’ right hand. Her icy glare had him skittering off toward the patient's room.
“Come with me Martinez, '' Shiksie said softly, doing her best to seem unopposing to him.
Martinez grumbled slightly, he did not want to have to spend more time alone with Shiksie. At least today she seemed to be slightly less forceful with him. The two of them walked out of the office, Martinez saw Shikise pull out her datapad and send a message off to someone, he assumed it to likely be Harnsis. He hoped whatever Shiksie had sent wasn’t going to reflect badly on him. He had knuckled down through his PTSD and episodes to treat patients before, he has never really had the choice not to do so, at this point it has just become a habit.
Once the two of them were out of the building Shiksie led Martinez towards one of the small gardens that was nearby to the building. It was just a simple fountain that had some benches nearby. A ring of well-kept flower beds surrounds it, this time of year they were in full bloom; dozens of vibrant colors swaying like waves as the wind gently pushed on them. Shiksie had always liked it out here, it was not uncommon for her to eat lunch or take a break out here after a particularly nasty patient or situation.
“Would you like to take a seat?” Shiksie asked Martinez while gesturing towards the nearest bench.
Martinez did not say a word, but at least for the moment his heart rate had gone down slightly and he seemed more calm. She was overjoyed that she seemed to be right on the money and that it had something to do with that Urintal that was setting him off.
“Would it be alright If I have a seat as well?” Shiksie asked, still treading carefully around Martinez and his need for boundaries.
The look Martinez gave her was a surprise, it was a strange mixture of shock and confusion. Like he was amazed, Shiksie was asking for permission to do anything.
“Yeah go ahead,” Martinez said, scooting to the far side of the bench as Shiksie sat down nearby.
“So would you want to tell me what happened with the Urintal?” Shiksie asked.
Martinez groaned, he should have figured the moment the icy cat had stopped him she knew something was wrong. He was in no way going to tell her every vivid detail of his previous night, nor did he want her of all people to know the details of what happened in his past. The fact those two events were stacked on each other was just a lot for the sailor to tackle at once.
“I would really rather not, but I assume based on my injuries you probably already know something,” Martinez said
Shiksie sighed, leaned forward, and rested her elbows on her knees. She looked away and at the fountains flowing water, already well aware that just looking at Martinez had upset him before. She wanted him to feel safe and able to talk if he wanted.
“I have my assumptions, but nothing concrete,” Shiksie replied. “I would like it if you trusted me enough to talk about anything bothering you”
Martinez wondered if she truly meant that, She had done a lot to try and help him be welcome; That does not mean she should be fully trusted though.
“Shiksie I just want to get back to work,” Martinez said with a deep sullen tone. Shiksie could still easily smell the sheer amount of adrenaline oozing out of him.
“Listen I'm not going to force you to tell me about it, I just know you want to. You would not have followed me if not” Shiksie replied, “let's just sit here for a while, you can just tell me anything you feel comfortable with, alright?”
Martinez shifted awkwardly and looked towards Shiksie. The fact she looked almost as bad as he did was something he was not used to seeing from her. She was looking off at the far side of the fountain, her tail and ears were more still than he had ever seen them.
Maybe she is not as cold as I made her out to be, Martinez thought.
The two of them sat there in silence for a while, neither certain how long it was but eventually Martinez resumed talking. Shiksies' ears twitched to listen in on what had happened. Martinez walked her through the events of the previous night, but he left out what his dreams had been about. He just told her that the whiplash of going from a nice relaxing date to being in a fight for his life had brought up bad memories from when he was in the Navy.
Shiksie was surprised by the story she heard. She did not expect Martinez to have started to date so quickly, She felt that thorn in her side remembering how badly she messed up with meeting him; Not that she wanted to date Martinez, but the fact he was so easy to get along with just showed her how badly she failed. The most shocking part was how he hospitalized two Urintal, one completely on his own. She just had a few more things about the previous night she wanted to ask.
“Why did you jump into the fight so willingly?” Shiksie asked.
Martinez sighed slightly unsure of the answer himself. He immediately thought it might have been “because it was the right thing to do” but even he knew that wasn’t the whole answer. He felt guilty about not being able to help in the past, and he would be damned if he could stop something bad before it happened.
“I'm not sure” Martinez lied, he just did not want to tell Shiksie about his previous fights with the Human Navy.
“That's alright, we don't always do,” Shiksie said. She thought back to her own parents, how she was still to this day unsure why they sacrificed themselves, or even why the accident caused that sacrifice to happen.
Shiksie looked back at Martinez for the first time since they sat down. Her usually sharp predatory features seemed far softer than before. She did not even hear Martinez’s heart run away when they made eye contact.
Martinez smiled softly back at her, his usually fiery glower a much duller blaze. It wasn't the usual inferno she saw in him, more akin to a tired dwindling flame.
Before she had a chance to say anything else she felt her datapad ringing indicating a call. Looking at the screen, her own heart sank. Why is the director calling me?
​
​
-----------
So what did you think? lemme here it I love to talk to you all. updoot if you liked.
side note: I am planning out my next project to be a offshoot set on Verilon, in the current day of the story.
​
your bud
-pirate
----------
Next:
Previous :
https://www.reddit.com/humansarespaceorcs/comments/13t55y6/human_trauma_section_eleven_blood_and_bandages/
First
https://www.reddit.com/humansarespaceorcs/comments/121mgy1/human_trauma/

VIDEO 5 Video recorded in Timicuan Preserve Fort Caroline, Florida on 1/19/23 CUMULATIVE VOCABULARY Alacrity - cheerful readiness, promptness, or willingness. Anecdotal - based on personal observation, case study reports, or random investigations rather than systematic scientific evaluation. Don’t equate correlation with causation. Apocryphal - 1580s, "of doubtful authenticity,” Archetype - the original pattern or model from which all things of the same kind are copied or on which they are based; a model or first form; prototype. (in Jungian psychology) a collectively inherited unconscious idea, pattern of thought, image, etc., universally present in individual psyches. Bamboozle - "to cheat, trick, swindle," 1703, originally a slang or cant word, of unknown origin. Banal - devoid of freshness or originality; hackneyed; trite: Banshee - (in Irish folklore) a spirit in the form of a wailing woman who appears to or is heard by members of a family as a sign that one of them is about to die. Beatdown - a violent physical beating, an emphatic or overwhelming defeat Bellicose - early 15c., "inclined to fighting," from Latin bellicosus "warlike, valorous, given to fighting Bildungsroman - a type of novel concerned with the education, development, and maturing of a young protagonist. Bludgeon - a short, heavy club with one end weighted, or thicker and heavier than the other. to strike or knock down with a bludgeon. to force into something; coerce; bully: Bombast - speech too pompous for an occasion; pretentious words. Obsolete - cotton or other material used to stuff garments; padding. Braggadocio - empty boasting; bragging. a boasting person; braggart. Brawl - an angry, rough, noisy fight, especially one engaged in under the influence of alcohol: to engage in angry, rough, noisy fighting, especially while under the influence of alcohol: Bravado - a pretentious, swaggering display of courage. Bromide - a platitude or trite saying. A person who is platitudinous and boring. Brouhaha - excited public interest, discussion, or the like, as the clamor attending some sensational event; hullabaloo: an episode involving excitement, confusion, turmoil, etc., especially a broil over a minor or ridiculous cause Bubkes - The Yiddish word bubkes (also spelled in both English and Yiddish as bupkes or bubkus) is thought to be short for the colorful kozebubkes, which means 'goat droppings'—something you may want to consider the next time you find yourself saying 'I've got bubkes. Bugaboo; something that causes fear or worry; bugbear; bogy. Origin - something to frighten a child, fancied object of terror," 1843, earlier buggybow (1740), probably an alteration of bugbear (also see bug (n.)), but connected "Dictionary of American Slang" with Bugibu, a demon in the Old French poem "Aliscans" from 1141, Bumptious - offensively self-assertive. Cajole - “deceive or delude by flattery," It may have originated from a French word for trapping a bird in a cage Chutzpah - informal shameless audacity; impudence. (Yiddish) Claptrap - pretentious but insincere or empty language: His speeches seem erudite but analysis reveals them to be mere claptrap. Any artifice or expedient for winning applause or impressing the public. 1730, "a trick to 'catch' applause," A stage term. Clobber - to batter severely; strike heavily: to defeat decisively; drub; trounce: to denounce or criticize vigorously. Compelling; force or push toward a course of action; overpowering: having a powerful and irresistible effect; requiring acute admiration, attention, or respect: Dogmatic - asserting opinions in a doctrinaire or arrogant manner; opinionated Donnybrook - an inordinately wild fight or contentious dispute; brawl; free-for-all Doppelgänger - a ghostly double or counterpart of a living person. Dustup - a quarrel; argument; row Factotum - "one who does all kinds of work for another,” A jack of all trades. Fac - make, and totem - everything. Great resume word. Feckless - ineffective; incompetent; futile: having no sense of responsibility; indifferent; lazy. Scottish shortened form of effect. Fracas - a noisy, disorderly disturbance or fight; riotous brawl; uproar. Gadfly - “fly which bites cattle," probably from gad (n.) "goad, metal rod," here in the sense of "stinger;" but the sense is entangled with gad. (v.) "Rove about" (on the notion, perhaps, of the insect's power of flight or of the restlessness of animals plagued by them), and another early meaning of gadfly was "someone who likes to go about, often stopping here and there" (1610s). Sense of "one who irritates another" Hackneyed - made commonplace or trite; stale; banal.