Dear Dad!
I wish you were here now. You are the closest person to me, you always understand, accept and support me with all of your heart. I always feel safe with you, i would tell you anything because i know you truly care about me. When i was a kid you used to hold me and calm me when i was scared or i had a bad dream. You used to sing me to sleep or tell me bedtime story or just sit on my bed next to me till i could sleep again. I loved when u watched and supported me at my basketball matches, i played much more confident when i know you watched me. You made me sandwich every morning at my schooldays and when i had a hard test and i was nervous you bought me my favorite chocolate and wished me good luck. In the beach you threw me into the water and we ate a lot of junkfood. In the winter we played in the snow till all of our clothes got wet, after that when we got inside you made me hot tea and watched our favorite show. In the spring we collected the fruits in the garden and you tought me how to cook jam of them. We played in the garden all day and we were wizards, indians, jedi knights, pirates, bandits and everithing we wanted. You taught me how to whistle or how to spit far but also that the family is the most important thing and we always support and love each other. And if we argue we wont go to bed till we speak about it. You taught me im valuable and worth to love, that i can do anything if i want. You taught me that everybody makes mistakes becasue we are people and also the mistakes can be corrected. You are my bigger supporter and my best friend i know if im sad about something you will always make time for me to speak because you truly cares. I cant be thankful enough for your love and i wouldnt be the same without you. I can just hope if i will have a family that i will be as good father as you.
​
My biggest pain is that you are not real. But everything i wrote is true, and i lived every single moment in my head. I wish you were here. I love you!

The episode resumed with a shot of the Final Two holding the effigies their helpers had made as Chef wheeled the person formerly in a hazmat suit in a wheelchair, their suit traded in for a full body cast.
Izzy spoke up. "Are we actually going to throw our dummies into an active volcano without any safety? That sounds lethal, even for me."
"As the saying goes, 'No excruciating pain, no million dollar gain'," Chris told her, pulling out a briefcase as a reminder then promptly tossing it away. "To help you get those dummies to the top of the volcano, you can use the rewards your teams earned on your behalf in the Aftermath Lava Surfing challenge," he continued.
"Ezekiel won a wheelbarrow. Too bad he's out," he said, the camera panning the host at the base of the volcano as the wheelbarrow rolled down next to the host, "but Alejandro gets a baby stroller," the stroller rolled down next to the wheelbarrow, "and Izzy gets diddly squat."
"What?" Mal gaped.
"Mal," Chris said, "for winning the effigy challenge, you get a twenty-second head start. So, get going!"
"Toodles," Mal said, running off with the wooden statue in his arms.
"At least this dummy's light," Izzy said, carrying it in her arms.
Mal tossed his dummy into his baby stroller as soon as he came to Chris, then ran up the slope chuckling as it did not break.
Chris watched him go with his usual smile, then turned to watch Izzy as she walked up. "Shouldn't I have the wheelbarrow if Ezekiel's not competing?" Izzy said.
"Sure, why not?" Chris said, watching Izzy put her dummy in her wheelbarrow and push it up the hill.
\
The scene cut to Mal running up the mountainside path at a decent rate. "It's been a long ride," he told himself, "but I'm going to claim the prize and live life comfortably!"
\
The camera panned down to Izzy, still pushing her effigy up the slope and panting heavily. "Why am I getting tired now of all places?" she said to herself.
"Having trouble?" Mal called out mockingly. "Maybe if you continue to run like a freak of nature, you might get to the top in time to see me win the money. But I doubt it!" he laughed, running off again.
The path soon leveled off, he passed a few bushes, then saw what was ahead and frantically skidded to a halt. He stopped right on the edge of a bubbling lava pool. "What the inferno?" he asked, the camera getting an overhead shot of the lava right before it flared up, forcing Mal to dive away with his rather flammable dummy.
Chris chuckled off-screen, and the camera zoomed out to show him and Chef standing on the other side of the lava lake. "Yoo hoo, over he~ere!" he called in a light and airy voice, waving to the malice filled man. A series of stepping stones spanned the gap between the two sides, but hanging over it from a large wooden frame were several heavy objects: from the left to right were a log, a grand piano, a safe, a simple weight, a purple armchair, a metal cage, and a bomb. The ropes holding the objects in the air ran along the framework and down to a structure near Chris and Chef, where each individual rope was tied around a long log.
"Check out the look on his face," Chris told his assistant as the camera zoomed in on them and the two men high-fived.
Izzy finally arrived at the other end of the lava pool, stopping when she saw it. "Now what?" she said in awed disbelief.
"The only way to the top of the volcano," Chris said as the camera panned across a close-up of the stepping stones, "is past this river of lava," he pointed down at the bubbling rock as the camera reached him again. "Those rewards probably won't be too helpful," he added, Mal and Izzy frowning as they stood by with their respective dummies.
"All you have to do is hop across these stepping stones," the host continued, moving over closer to the end of the path. "Easy-peasy, hot and cheesy!" he said as the lava flared up again. "Buu~uut," he added impishly as the camera panned across the hanging objects, "we've rigged a few booby traps to, that's right!"
"Make things more interesting," the two finished in annoyance.
"Chef," Chris turned to his assistant, "a booby demo, if you please!"
Chef took out a machete then turned around and chopped the first rope. The freed end quickly slid back through the wooden frame, and the log dropped onto the first stepping stone, broke, and fell into the lava with a burst of flame and a splatter of molten rock. Izzy raised an eyebrow and Mal gasped in surprise.
"Yeah, you really don't want to get hit by those," Chris told them. "Your helpers can either keep them secure," he continued, turning around and motioning to the two pairs that were standing by the tied-up ropes, "or send them falling. It's your call. Aaaand, go!"
Mal got moving first, picking up his dummy out of the stroller and running from stone to stone. Izzy lagged behind, but she still kept up.
"Chop the ropes! Now!" Mal commanded, and the shot cut over to Noah, Eva, Sky, and Shawn on the far side of the river.
"Team E-Scope, don't let them win!" Izzy cried out.
"Hold on!" Sky stopped everyone. "I don't want to fight anyone, or help out Mal."
"Me too," Shawn agreed. "I'm just here because I have too."
"I said cut the ropes!" Mal shouted forcefully.
"You two are right. Let's leave them at each other's throats," Noah said.
"Or better yet, we sabotage Mal," Eva offered.
"I'm already ahead of you!" Shawn grinned and grabbed a machete. He chopped down the rope holding the couch, and Mal took notice and jumped onto the next stone.
"Don't even think about messing with me!" Mal growled.
"Can't hear you!" Shawn mocked him as he cut a series of ropes. A bank vault, piano, and cage all fell down, but Mal effortlessly avoided all of them and eventually made it to the end.
"How were you able to avoid all of those?" Noah wondered. "That cage should've contained you."
"Mike's personalities can come in handy. I'll be taking my leave now," Mal laughed and made his way to the volcano.
Izzy reached the four helpers. "Welp, that was a bust," she griped.
"Don't just stand around complaining," Eva said. "Go to the volcano."
"And what about you guys?" Izzy asked.
"We'll catch up with you two with the helicopter Chris drove us here in," Sky added.
Izzy's face turned into determination. "Here I go! Time to stop the biggest, most baddest villain in TD history!" She let out a battlecry and dashed hastily towards the volcano.
\
The scene changed to a long-distance upward shot of the volcano, soon cutting to the top as the camera panned across the non-competitors, gathered in a sweaty and sweltering mass on the rim of the volcano's crater.
An upward pan of Chris holding the million-dollar suitcase revealed him standing happily in a cool breeze, the shot zooming out to show it being caused by a giant electric fan blowing air over a large ice cube being held on an intern's back. Several more ice cubes were stacked around the area, and were already beginning to melt.
"So...," Chris said to Chef, the pilot standing beside him, "know of any season three wrap parties?"
Chef didn't answer, and instead averted his gaze and walked away whistling in a very suspicious manner.
Chris frowned at him, but his expression quickly changed to excitement as he looked out over the edge of the volcano. "And here they come!" he announced as Mal was shown racing up the path with his dummy.
The shot cut to the edge of the crater as the dummy was thrown up first, followed by the villain leaping up with a dark smile on his face. He caught the dummy and grinned even more.
"Looking for this?" Chris asked as the shot cut to the million dollar case.
Mal let out a dry chuckle as he made his way to the edge of the crater.
"Stop right there!" Izzy's voice said, causing him to pause and turn around mid-way.
"Izzy," Mal said as the camera cut to the girl at the roof of the crater next to her dummy. "Can't you see I'm about to beat you? Just spare us the trouble and let me win!"
"If there's anyone who deserves to be competing against me, it should be Mike!" Izzy argued back.
"Mike is nothing to me!" Mal shouted furiously. "He should be the one left behind, not me!" That was when he inhaled sharply as his head got closer to the camera.
\
Suddenly, Mal began falling and landing in the pink grounds of Mike's brain.
"Urgh." Mal grunted before his eyes widened and he saw that his tower was practically rubble at this point. "Impossible. Where's my tower?" Mal asked furiously.
"It's gone Mal. It's gone for good," Mike smirked victoriously as he entered, much to Mal's anger.
"How were you able to push that button? I had that reinforced so your puny arms could not penetrate it," Mal asked angrily.
"I'm not half as weak as you think I am. It's time to end this," Mike glared at the evil alter who smirked fiendishly.
"Very well," Mal said with sadistic glee, "This should only take ten seconds." Soon, Mal and Mike charged at each other fiercely and began punching and kicking each other with so much ferocity.
\
Meanwhile, at the top of the volcano, Mike and Mal were having such a gigantic fight that Mike's body was thrashing itself violently much to everyone's horror.
"What is he doing?!" Owen asked in concern.
Heather stood in front of Cody protectively.
"Surrender already, you peon!" Mal grunted angrily as Mike's body continued to thrash violently.
"N-never!" Mike said confidently as he continued to claw at himself.
Noah gasped at the scene. "Mike's fighting Mal for control of his body!" Noah realized.
\
Inside Mike's mind, Mal tackled Mike down as the latter struggled to get himself off of the evil alter.
"Look at you, so pitiful and pathetic!" Mal hissed viciously, "You were a fool to challenge me. It's not like your friends will ever forgive you for this. How will they see you now that they know I exist?"
Mike seemed to be in thought about Mal's words but chose not to let them get to him. "I won't let you win this!" Mike raised his foot to kick Mal in the kiwis, causing Mal to release him from his hold out of instinct.
Mike pushed Mal back and began punching him, trying to keep him down but Mal did not look like he was giving in.
\
Back at the top of the volcano, everyone was anxiously watching the fight unfold.
"What are we gonna do?!" Sadie said in horror.
Sky seemed to be in deep thought before smiling. "We have to rally Mike on! Show him that he's not alone in this!"
"I'm on it," Shawn nodded before speaking up. "Mike! It's me, Shawn! I just want to let you know that no one is mad at you about Mal's actions!"
"All of us are logical enough to separate Mal from Mike. It's just common sense!" Noah smiled encouragingly.
"We're all rooting for you to kick Mal's butt!" Eva added happily.
"We know you can do it," Ella encouraged.
"Mike! I just want you to know that you're my best friend and I can't imagine life without you! I know it may seem rough in there but please, we all have your back!" Sky said encouragingly.
\
Back in his mind, Mike smiled warmly as he heard this and Mal got up, all tattered and beaten. "Those nobodies… are idiots. I'm a part of you and they WILL see that!" Mal cried out in fury.
"You're wrong Mal! You may be a part of my mind, but everything you ever did was all you and no one else!" Mike spoke in determination.
"You always wanted me to rely on you. To make yourself feel important. That desire turned you bitter and hateful and led you to who you are today. You wanted me to feel scared and feel I needed you to be tough, but guess what? I have friends up there. Friends who have stuck by my side even when they learned my disorder before I could properly confess, friends who stuck by me even if they voted me off in season one for the others' behavior, and friends who still stay beside me despite everything you ever did to me!"
Mike's body began glowing white, and for the first time in Mal's life, he felt genuine fear in his eyes. "No… you can't do this to me. No one will ever cross you with me in charge," Mal pleaded desperately, "I'm a part of you."
Mike just narrowed his eyes. "That's true. I can't get rid of you, but I can seal you enough to where you can never cause this much trouble EVER AGAIN!"
Soon, Mike used his hands to shoot a powerful white blast which Mal tried to resist but in the end, it was hopeless and he was blasted into the deepest corners of Mike's mind.
"IT'S MY TIME!!!! MMMMIIIINNNNNEEEEEEE!" Mal cried out in horror as his voice faded into the distance.
Back at the volcano, Mike opened his eyes and grabbed his head. "Wh-Where am I?"
"Mike! He's back!" Ezekiel cried out happily before Topher stopped Ezekiel from going to help him up.
"Wait, this could be a trap," Topher said sternly.
"Let me try something," Duncan told the group before whistling 'In the Hall of the Mountain King,' and all he got was a blank stare from Mike.
"It's really me guys. I swear," Mike smiled encouragingly.
"Mike! You're back!" Sky cried out as she embraced the comedian, to which Shawn, Noah, Dawn, Ella, Sadie, Lindsay, and Cody were all quick to join in.
"Guys, I am so sorry about everything Mal did," Mike apologized profusely. "I should have told you all about him after last season, but I thought he was no longer a problem and-"
"It's okay. We know you never meant for this to happen," Shawn smiled at his friend.
"I promise. I won't forget to let you all know about my problems," Mike pledged.
"Great to have you back," Chris said with an unamused look on his face, "but can one of you toss your sacrifice in the volcano already?"
"The one next to you," Topher told Mike as Izzy dragged her dummy. "If you toss it in the lava before Izzy does, then you win the million dollars."
Mike and Izzy locked eyes, then he grabbed his dummy and both ran as fast as they could to the edge of the volcano.
Quickly forming a plan, Izzy slid to a stop and hurled her dummy. It flew through the sky like a bullet, and moments later, it soared into the lava unceremoniously, and aside from a small splash-back that the Peanut Gallery quickly dodged, nothing happened.
"Oh yes!!!" Izzy boomed. "I won! I won! I won!" she cheered, jumping up and down in glee.
"And that's a cool million for Izzy," Chris told the audience. "The winner of Total Drama World Tour!" The contestants all applauded and cheered for the winner.
"Way to go, Izzy!" Owen cheered out loud.
"Nice job, eh!" Ezekiel clapped his hands.
Chris opened up the briefcase for Izzy, who marveled at the dollar bills inside. "It's so beautiful!" she exclaimed as she took the briefcase and hugged it tightly.
"You worked hard for the money, Izzy," Mike said as he walked over to congratulate her. "I'm just glad to be back in control again."
"You're welcome, and stay you, Mike," Izzy shook hands with Mike.
"Ohh, you didn't throw any pineapples in the volcano, did you?" an unfamiliar voice asked, the camera panning right a little ways just as two elderly Hawaiian men in flowery skirts and leis walked up.
"There are signs everywhere!" the other said.
The camera cut to the Peanut Gallery all stepping away to show several signs with crossed-out pineapples on them.
"Oh yeah," Chris said blankly. "They really ruined the shot, so we put the human wall there."
A third old Hawaiian man came over to reveal another sign. "Don't you know what happens when pineapples meet lava?"
It was then that the volcano shook and rumbled, a long-distance shot of it showing a few reddish streaks forming along the outer edge of the crater.
"Uh-oh," Chris said, gaining the camera's attention as the volcano was shaking, "Didn't see that one coming. Anywho," he chuckled before taking a deep breath and yelling "RRRUUUUNNNNNN!"
The volcano was shown from a distance again, the smoke billowing from the top turning into a full-blown eruption of fire.
Back at the top, the three Hawaiian men went running back towards the path down, followed by Chris, Izzy, Mike, and the rest of the contestants as lava began to cover the screen.
It parted as the scene cut to the base of the volcano, the former contestants running and screaming across the beach as flaming rocks rained down from above and the lava took over the screen again.
"See you next season I guess," Chris said as the camera cut to him as fire continued to fall. "Maybe with a whole new cast, 'cause let's face it – these guys are probably gonna melt," he laughed.
"Until next time," the host said, his voiced strained as the scene cut to him standing up in front of the sky. "I'm Chris McLean, and this has been Total! Drama!" The camera zoomed out to reveal that him and Chef were now aboard the old Boat of Losers, but the host's outtro was interrupted by a sudden object. Both men looked up, and one of the rocks, entirely on fire, was shown rocketing towards the boat.
Chris and Chef ducked to either side as it landed, punching a hole in the ship with its crash. The Boat of Losers began to sink, and the rest of the cast treading water nearby laughed as the two adults went under.
Their mirth was short-lived, however, and quickly turned to terror and they swam away screaming as large flaming rocks started raining down upon them once again, and the footage cut to static.
(Roll the Credits)
\
(Bonus Clip)
The shot featured flaming rocks hitting the ocean and whatnot. The rocks caused some splashes, but they weren't big enough to fully cover the screen.
The camera panned to the right to show Ezekiel Clone on his raft. A big smile formed on his face as he drank his coconut and watched the lava explosion. Noticing the camera, he gave it a wave before it faded to black.
18th: Shawn
17th: Amy
16th: Lindsay
15th: Rodney
14th: Jo
Eliminated: Owen
13th: Duncan
12th: Sky
11th: Heather
10th: Cody
9th: Ella
8th: Noah
7th: Sadie
6th: Owen
5th: Eva
4th: Topher
3rd: Ezekiel
2nd: Mike
1st: Izzy

So I'm trying to find a play partner for some outdoor play, best term I can think to describe would be "exhibitionist" though thats not quite right maybe?
Basically I want to find someone who will put me in situations where I'm still legally clothed but I'm minimally attired or attired in a such a way to make me nervous / on edge say a speedo on a hiking trail where there is a potential risk of running into someone and therefore I'd be on the spot potentially trying to explain why I was wearing just a speedo, where I'd would dropped off and I'd have to meet them at the other end, another scenario would be washing their car at a jetwash again in just a speedo or harder a hike in a remote area midweek outwith summer say on a cool cloudy day, where I'm not going to encounter anyone and therefore leave me naked to meet them at a point in the distance or they hike with me but I'm the only one naked or even as simple as being left at a busy beach in a speedo adorned with some embarrassing pattern or one that just covers everything and thus ensuring I'm constantly aware of how little is protecting my modesty, Its not a great explanation I know and I'm really struggling to describe this in a manner that makes sense and doesn't sound "wrong" or unacceptable.
Kinda a mix of only one naked or partially clothed, submission, forced exhibitionism, a degree of humiliation/embarrassment
I'm sorry if my description is a bit muddled, I'm not au fait with BDSM terms and I have ADHD which makes things harder still :/
Any thoughts?
Thank you.

Hey all!
Heading to your fine city in August and have a few questions
1) From what I understand the beaches aren’t really swimmable. Realistically, how far south would I have to drive to go somewhere to swim? I read possibly Santa Cruz? Looked like it was only a little more than an hour. I would also specifically like to swin in the pacific.
2)I know it’s cliche but, I can read what’s the best bars or clubs but, what do you all think? I’m trying to be a lil boujee on this trip and want to hit some nice places.
3)Same as number 2 kinda, just about Hotels. I’m leaning towards the Fairmont or Driscoll. Are these worth it? Something nicer? Trying to live the high life out there.
Appreciate any and all help!

Decent hang out spots on Thursday night in Clearwater beach?

Hello /warhammercompetitive, you may remember me from such posts as this where I took the Greater Brass Scorpion (GBS) to LVO and went 4-2, or from my most recent escapade, where I took it to BAO last weekend and went 4-2 in this batrep. As 10e approached closer and closer, I lived in the comforting blanket of assured security that the GBS would be safe, as 40k is the only game it's legal in and FW support was clearly expanding with new plastic kits for FW products. I'm happy that turned out to be true I'm extremely disappointed that's not the case. Even more so with the insulting implication that its discontinuation in 40k is a result of it being lumped in with 'Horus Heresy' models. I don't know who in GW's read the HH books, but I assure you there is nary a GBS in those pages. Mind you, as the proud owner of a kytan, 2 decimators, 2 blood slaughterers, and 1 chaos droppod, my disappointment is not limited to the scribbliest-scrabbliest of models.
As someone who enjoyed running the model (there are DOZENS of us), I'm extremely saddened to see it go from competitive (and therefore essentially all) play. Since the inception of LEGENDS I've played legitimately 3-6 40k games a month, and I have never once seen a LEGENDS model in any game. So, the fate of batreps including Mr. Pinchy are seemingly going to be extremely few and far between. I'm thrilled I decided to bring it to BAO and take it to the beach 1 last time before GW puts it down for good moves it to a farm upstate. I will be sending GW a firm, but polite, email asking for their reasoning in this decision. Let's be honest, it's not for any ease of balance. I suppose I could throw it down in a 30k match, see how that plays. In the short term, my current advice would be to dodge FW models, I have a feeling their existence will come to a full end in 11e.
But what does all this rambling nonsense about me being sad about GW taking away my favorite toy mean as we transition to 10e? I like running insane-off-meta ideas into GTs/Majors and seeing how it does because meta is boring. And I like writing batreps after those events, partly because people here find them enjoyable and partly because I feel like writing how taking off-meta lists to GTs/Majors can end with good results can remove some of the stigma over major competitive events and inspire others to come up with other creative, off-meta ideas. So I will keep running off-meta lists at least every so often and publishing post-GT/Major batreps, it's just that they won't be accompanied by the best boi. Nothing currently has the pull on me that the large scorpion had, but we'll see how that changes in 10e. And obviously I'm always on the lookout for input. Maybe if the Mawloc/Trygon models don't suck, 'oops all ground-noodles' will be funny.

I'm not sure if this belongs here, but it feels a lot like deep, long-term heartbreak. I'm 23F. For most of my life, I've felt like an outcast. Always on the outside looking in. Like something must be wrong with me to command this type of dismissal in every environment I'm in. Like I must be missing something socially. I'm friendly with everyone, but feel close with nobody. Despite my best efforts over the years to either create a friend group or tag along and embed myself, the friendships I crave have never quite aligned for me. I always got along with all different friend groups as a floater, but never embedded into them. I make people laugh. I try to invest my conversations in other people's life and interests. I consider myself an empathetic person and deeply caring. I have my own interests and I always try to find common grounds. But nobody shows the same energy back, and nobody considers me enough to invite me out even when I make subtle attempts to invite myself or inquire. I've been told before that I'm "intense" and "boring." And it hurts deep in my soul. I don't want to be anything that separates me from others. I feel cutting pain on an almost daily basis over my lack of connection to other human beings. My entire childhood and high school experience felt like this, and so did my upbringing with my mother. College I was a loner commuter student. My best friends have been my past ex boyfriends, but even my last ex excluded me much the same way when we used to work together. I wasn't invited out with him and our coworkers. Fast forward to now, the same things happen to me at work. My coworkers all go out without me, all the girls, and are very quiet at work about it. They're friendly to me and I'm friendly to them, and we make jokes, they rant to me etc, but they don't include me in after work drinks, clubbing, gym sessions, or beach days etc. My heart sinks every day to see them hanging out together and how grateful I would've been to be there with them. I've inquired before and they lie to me about not doing anything after work, then post about being out. There's even been times where I'll go to a workout class and see 3 or 4 of them together, me by myself because I wasn't invited or even given the chance to go with them. It makes me cry all the time. Now, I know many will say I can't rely on others to feel better, or be desperate for friends. My ex boyfriend said that I might be giving off "desperate" energy, and I "should not want friends, just accept it" but I've tried everything to make this not the case. He was my best friend, and he left me. He's reached out multiple times since he dumped me last year, but it was too traumatic of a breakup to respond to him. I feel separated from life now, like the only cord stringing me to life was cut. I am going on multiple international solo trips this year, I travel alone, I go to restaurants alone, I do most things alone. I've gotten a new job and the same dynamic still repeats. I don't have a problem doing things alone, it's that I don't want to live my whole life isolated. I've continued my life in spite of the lack of human connection, still searching for it because the way I felt being connected to even my ex boyfriend (who didn't treat me well) still felt better than I feel right now. I just feel like my soul hurts on a deep level, with no way out, sometimes I cry to God about what I have done in a past life to deserve this level of isolation.

I'm not sure if this belongs here, but it feels a lot like deep, long-term heartbreak.
I'm 23F. For most of my life, I've felt like an outcast. Always on the outside looking in. Like something must be wrong with me to command this type of dismissal in every environment I'm in. Like I must be missing something socially. I'm friendly with everyone, but feel close with nobody. Despite my best efforts over the years to either create a friend group or tag along and embed myself, the friendships I crave have never quite aligned for me. I always got along with all different friend groups as a floater, but never embedded into them. I make people laugh. I try to invest my conversations in other people's life and interests. I consider myself an empathetic person and deeply caring. I have my own interests and I always try to find common grounds. But nobody shows the same energy back, and nobody considers me enough to invite me out even when I make subtle attempts to invite myself or inquire. I've been told before that I'm "intense" and "boring." And it hurts deep in my soul. I don't want to be anything that separates me from others. I feel cutting pain on an almost daily basis over my lack of connection to other human beings. My entire childhood and high school experience felt like this, and so did my upbringing with my mother. College I was a loner commuter student. My best friends have been my past ex boyfriends, but even my last ex excluded me much the same way when we used to work together. I wasn't invited out with him and our coworkers.
Fast forward to now, the same things happen to me at work. My coworkers all go out without me, all the girls, and are very quiet at work about it. They're friendly to me and I'm friendly to them, and we make jokes, they rant to me etc, but they don't include me in after work drinks, clubbing, gym sessions, or beach days etc. My heart sinks every day to see them hanging out together and how grateful I would've been to be there with them. I've inquired before and they lie to me about not doing anything after work, then post about being out. There's even been times where I'll go to a workout class and see 3 or 4 of them together, me by myself because I wasn't invited or even given the chance to go with them. It makes me cry all the time.
Now, I know many will say I can't rely on others to feel better, or be desperate for friends. My ex boyfriend said that I might be giving off "desperate" energy, and I "should not want friends, just accept it" but I've tried everything to make this not the case. He was my best friend, and he left me. He's reached out multiple times since he dumped me last year, but it was too traumatic of a breakup to respond to him. I feel separated from life now, like the only cord stringing me to life was cut. I am going on multiple international solo trips this year, I travel alone, I go to restaurants alone, I do most things alone. I've gotten a new job and the same dynamic still repeats. I don't have a problem doing things alone, it's that I don't want to live my whole life isolated. I've continued my life in spite of the lack of human connection, still searching for it because the way I felt being connected to even my ex boyfriend (who didn't treat me well) still felt better than I feel right now. I just feel like my soul hurts on a deep level, with no way out, sometimes I cry to God about what I have done in a past life to deserve this level of isolation.

I'm not sure if this belongs here, but it feels a lot like deep, long-term heartbreak.
I'm 23F. For most of my life, I've felt like an outcast. Always on the outside looking in. Like something must be wrong with me to command this type of dismissal in every environment I'm in. Like I must be missing something socially. I'm friendly with everyone, but feel close with nobody. Despite my best efforts over the years to either create a friend group or tag along and embed myself, the friendships I crave have never quite aligned for me. I always got along with all different friend groups as a floater, but never embedded into them. I make people laugh. I try to invest my conversations in other people's life and interests. I consider myself an empathetic person and deeply caring. I have my own interests and I always try to find common grounds. But nobody shows the same energy back, and nobody considers me enough to invite me out even when I make subtle attempts to invite myself or inquire. I've been told before that I'm "intense" and "boring." And it hurts deep in my soul. I don't want to be anything that separates me from others. I feel cutting pain on an almost daily basis over my lack of connection to other human beings. My entire childhood and high school experience felt like this, and so did my upbringing with my mother. College I was a loner commuter student. My best friends have been my past ex boyfriends, but even my last ex excluded me much the same way when we used to work together. I wasn't invited out with him and our coworkers.
Fast forward to now, the same things happen to me at work. My coworkers all go out without me, all the girls, and are very quiet at work about it. They're friendly to me and I'm friendly to them, and we make jokes, they rant to me etc, but they don't include me in after work drinks, clubbing, gym sessions, or beach days etc. My heart sinks every day to see them hanging out together and how grateful I would've been to be there with them. I've inquired before and they lie to me about not doing anything after work, then post about being out. There's even been times where I'll go to a workout class and see 3 or 4 of them together, me by myself because I wasn't invited or even given the chance to go with them. It makes me cry all the time.
Now, I know many will say I can't rely on others to feel better, or be desperate for friends. My ex boyfriend said that I might be giving off "desperate" energy, and I "should not want friends, just accept it" but I've tried everything to make this not the case. He was my best friend, and he left me. He's reached out multiple times since he dumped me last year, but it was too traumatic of a breakup to respond to him. I feel separated from life now, like the only cord stringing me to life was cut. I am going on multiple international solo trips this year, I travel alone, I go to restaurants alone, I do most things alone. I've gotten a new job and the same dynamic still repeats. I don't have a problem doing things alone, it's that I don't want to live my whole life isolated. I've continued my life in spite of the lack of human connection, still searching for it because the way I felt being connected to even my ex boyfriend (who didn't treat me well) still felt better than I feel right now. I just feel like my soul hurts on a deep level, with no way out, sometimes I cry to God about what I have done in a past life to deserve this level of isolation.

My uneducated opinion is that Bradford Beach is the Third Beach of Milwaukee. Third Beach is supposedly the best beach of Rhode Island, according to some random person in the Preppy Handbook Facebook group.
Guys, screenshots are critical in a word of net neutrality. These are my June 2023 goals
March 2008 J. Crew calendar was really sad and gloomy. I can’t remember what we were so sad about (if art even reflects history accurately). Maybe it was the Democratic primary. I really don’t know.
Right now (DBT skill: validate) I am so so so overall happy about who I am as I approach age 32. I notice that I’m already wading deep in censored thought territory though. It’s gone from diversity of thought during Georgetown to outright censored/banned thought now. Is that a space I want to be in or need to be in? If I am willing to endure the social consequences that come with being a censored thinker, cool.
Hope I was decent to Reaper. It’s ultimately his say. I think I tried a decent effort. I’m not doing a list of my mistakes until after dinner.
Central Time used to be the American West and I can’t get over how cool that is. I do well in wild, frontier spaces.

Another post filled with things to do in the GC this weekend.

1 - Byron Bay Comedy Festival

• This festival really offers up a gorgeous boutique style experience, beachfront Byron Bay. World class entertainment is not the only thing Mell Coppin & Zara Noruzi (the Festival Directors ) deliver. Locally sourced food and delicious cocktails are served in a vintage Scandanavian styled space with the waves of main beach lapping just metres away.
• Byron Surf Club – Main Beach Byron Bay
• Friday - Sunday
• Depends on Session/Show

2 - Feast On Street Food At HOTA’s Hawker Night Markets

• International street food market with over 150 unique stalls, local bands, and street artists.
• HOTA precinct
• Friday, 2 June, evening
• Free

3 - Seafire 2023

• International fireworks competition on the beach with a show from Australia’s leading pyrotechnics team, Skylighter.
• Beaches of Surfers Paradise
• Saturday, 3 June, from 6pm to 9pm
• Free

4 - A Plant-Based Feed At The QLD Vegan Markets

• A vegan food and shopping market.
• Broadwater Parklands
• Saturday, 3 June, from 9am to 2pm
• Free

5 - Festival of The Stone

• Stone & Wood’s biggest beer and music festival of the year, celebrating the limited winter release of its Stone Beer – a woodfired porter brewed with hot stones in homage to the brand’s brewing ancestors.
• Stone & Wood Brewery 100 Centennial Cct, Byron Bay
• Sat June 03 2023, 3pm-10pm
• Under 18's: $33, Adults: $59.54

6 - Yoga Day Festival Gold Coast

• An iconic festival commemorating the United Nations International Day of Yoga, enjoy an incredible day of community celebrations for all things yoga!
• Justins Park 1698 Gold Coast Highway Burleigh Heads, QLD 4220
• Sun, 4 Jun 2023 9:00 AM - 3:00 PM AEST
• Free

Market Mania - Weekly Regulars:

• Burleigh Farmers Market - SATURDAY, 07:00 AM TO 12:00 PM
• The Helensvale Farmers Market - SATURDAY, 06:00 AM TO 11:00 AM
• Palm Beach Farmers Market - SATURDAY, 06:00 AM TO 11:30 AM
• Marina Mirage farmers market - SATURDAY, 06:30 AM TO 12:00 PM
• Surfers Paradise Beachfront Market - SATURDAY, 04:00 PM TO 09:00 PM
• HOTA Farmers & Artisan Markets - SUNDAY, 06:00 AM TO 11:30 AM
• Mudgeeraba Farmers' Markets - SATURDAY, 06:00 AM TO 11:30 AM
• Gold Coast Organic Market - SUNDAY, 06:00 AM TO 12:00 PM
• Nerang Market - SUNDAY, 06:00 AM TO 12:00 PM

​
WANT THIS VIA EMAIL INSTEAD?
After being the resident Gold Coast Reddit Sub Weekend Boredom Buster Informant for over a whole year now, your requests have spoken - you want these posts via email as well, with all the bells and whistles included for smooth sailing.
Well, you got it! I've launched a free mailing list to do just that. So, if an inbox full of Gold Coast's best events sounds like your jam, find the link in the comments to sign up.
Let's keep the fun rolling!
Edit: Was too eager to hit 'post'. Doesn't include 9 things. Only 6.

The wife and I are planning on going to Cabo San Lucas in July. What is the best all inclusive resort? Any recommendations help. We also were looking to do some tours and possibly visiting La Paz for Balandra Beach. We will be in Cabo San Lucas at least for 5 days. It’s our first time there. Thanks in advance 🙏

I should have done this earlier but, my friends and I are planning to go to Jones Beach tomorrow. What are the best spots for the beach? I'm thinking Short Beach in West End 2, but its our first time and we just want an area that isn't extremely crowded. TY for the help!

Follow up to: https://www.reddit.com/Charleston/comments/10meyp9/stop_isle_of_palms_from_destroying_mt_pleasants/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3
Mount Pleasant Town Council's Transportation Committee will receive a presentation next week from SCDOT on the Isle of Palms Connector survey results. Charleston Moves is requesting they support keeping the design of the Connector AS-IS. This Committee meeting is the most important opportunity we will have to avoid losing the best bicycle and pedestrian infrastructure possible on the Connector, so your voice is vital.
Write your email to [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]), the Town Clerk who will share your concerns with the Committee that the SCDOT presentation will be given to in order to inform whether the connector changes. Please include the following in your email:

• Where you live the Lowcountry
• Whether you walk or cycle regularly and would like to travel to the beach by bicycle
• Whether you support better examples of bicycle and pedestrian infrastructure in the region.
• Any other details you'd like in support of the bike lanes!

What’s the better steakhouse or is there a better one than these two we should go to? Going to be in town for a night and looking for a good steakhouse. House of prime rib seems the best but not sure if it’s just for the experience or if the quality is actually good as well
TIA!

Lots of notes from my first trip to Italy in late May. Maybe this will help other first-timers. We did Rome - Pompeii - Sorrento - Positano - Florence over 10 days.
Cities:
Rome: Get out early in the day. On our best day, we strolled to Trevi fountain before most of the shops had opened. We got to see them clean out the money from the fountain and that was oddly satisfying. By around 10 am...all hell breaks loose. It goes from kind of quiet to 'Where did they all come from?'. If there is a restaurant that you have heard of from Instagram...good luck getting in. Call or visit to put your name down. But here's the deal...we found lots of food options and I swear I never had a bad meal. Some were better than others but...good grief, it's all so damn good.
Vatican: I want to start an online petition to change the name to Catholic Disneyland. We booked a 3-hour tour and from the moment we arrived to the moment we left we were shoulder-to-shoulder with people. It was ridiculous and it made the day very very long. There is so much to take in and you are constantly being jostled by people…I can say I did it and I’d never go back.
Colosseum: We booked an underground tour as well as the main tour and that was amazing. You see where the gladiators came in and how they used to flood the floor of the Coliseum and do naval battles! The tour underground was small and you really got a chance to see how it all worked. Romans were impressive engineers and this spot showcases that.
The Forum: Our Colosseum tour included the Forum and…I liked it better. The view from the top of the Palatine Hill was worth the steps. Our guide really helped to bring this area alive for us.
Pompeii: Book a tour. There is so much and you’d miss half of it if someone wasn’t walking you through. We took an archaeologist tour and it was amazing. 2 hours and it felt like it was over in 20 minutes. You can take a regional train line directly to Pompeii and walk to the entrance. There is free (!!) luggage storage at the gate and the restaurant across the street was pretty good...but 'pretty good' in Italy is still 200x better than 'good' in the US.
Positano: Beautiful to look at…not much to do. Lots of shops…but they’re the same shops you’ll see all over this area. The restaurants were…ok. We went to a beach club, got 2 seats ($70), and paid too much for drinks. It was heaven.
Florence: Recommend walking to the top of Michelangelo Hill for the view. I think I should have been more impressed but by the time we got here it was 'ok...another church...cool....'
Weather: It rained every day we were there. Most of the time it rained in the afternoon. Also, most days the weather forecast never said rain was an option. Not a big deal, but bring a jacket.
AirBnB: Both our AirBnBs were great and hosted by fantastic people. Both were located near Piazzas and the listings did say 'some noise at night'. Ummm....yeah...that 'some noise' lasted until 2 am at both places. Bring. Ear. Plugs. Italians like to have a good time...for a long time.
Stuff:
Crime/Scams: This freaked me out a bit before we left. We bought cross-body bags and kept everything zipped up. Maybe it was too much but we made it through without incident. In Rome if anyone offers you a bracelet or says 'nice shoes' or 'Hey American!', put on your best impression of a new yorker and blow right past them. One guy through a bracelet to my son who instinctively caught it...and threw it back.
On the train from Naples to Pompeii it was standing room only...and about 90 muggy degrees. A guy in a down jacket was eyeing the young woman in front of me and paying very close attention to her bag. Her friends noticed and maneuvered him away from her but it was a reminder that you need to keep your eyes open...especially in crowded situations.
Verizon: We used their TravelPass for $10 a day; unlimited text and data. Having Google Maps and Google Translate whenever we needed it was worth it! Check your Verizon account…we found that we had ‘credits’ for 5 days that we could use!
Viator: We booked all our tours through this app and I could not be more pleased. Maybe we were lucky but all of the 5 tours we booked were fantastic. Would highly recommend it.
Ferryhopper: I would be careful here. We showed up for our trip from Sorrento to Positano. The boat hand looked at our ticket and said ‘I don’t know this ticket, I cannot take it’. There were a few exchanges and they let us on. I asked about it when we left and they said ‘It is best to book with us and not this application. We’ve had trouble’. Thankfully we did not book a return trip and could buy tickets at Positano. Take it for what it is…a warning. You don’t want to be stuck trying to find a ride to or from your destination.
ItaliaRail: Fantastic. Clean trains that were always on time for us. Booked directly through their site and it was effortless. Check the price of business class vs. coach. For us, it was well worth the extra $18 per seat.
Uber: Total bust. You are limited to Uber Black and even then…they may not come and pick you up.
FreeNow in Rome: We used this to book taxis in Rome to pick us up and take us to the train station. Scheduled in advance and the driver showed up without a hitch.
AppTaxi, itTaxi & FreeNow in Florence: So frustrating. I think it might have to do with where we were and the time of day but it was frustrating. Wasn’t feeling my best and a taxi ride would have been helpful. I waited over an hour trying to get someone to pick us up…nothing.
And finally...I’d like to kiss the person on this sub who mentioned Mobile Passport Control. This is an app you use when you return home from Europe. You answer the standard questions, take your photo and the app creates a QR code to use during customs checkout. When we got back to JFK there was a line specifically for MPC users. Our line: 5 people….those who did not use it: 125 people and growing fast. This saved us at least an hour at the end of a 10-hour flight. DOWNLOAD IT NOW!
Ok, that's rambling but I wanted to get it out there. I really appreciate this sub. Reading about other experiences helped me make our 10 days special.