How much does bob turk make

So I play with a group of people that I more or less have known since high school and college. The DM was one of my best friends since we were 14. Most of us are guys but there are two girls-“That Guy”s sister (Paladin) and my high school friend (Ranger). There were three other guys at the table. That Guy, Fighter, and Barbarian. (I’m just going to refer to most of these people by their class since there’s no way in hell I’m using real names).
Anyway, we hadn’t played D&D in a while because of the pandemic and even afterwards we all kind of had hectic schedules because of school and work (That Guy’s sister and Barbarian were still in college). But a couple of months ago we decided to run a home brewed campaign that was supposed to be like a mix between Game of Thrones and Lord of the Rings. The campaign was supposed to be very dark and I was excited. Well we get to session 0/1 and That Guy’s sister introduces us to him. He was her older brother and clearly socially awkward-he always seemed like the younger brother despite being 7 years older but he seemed like a good guy at first.
So we get into the game and we start to see red flags with this guy almost immediately. He was constantly threatening NPCs-even going as far as to murder a random Drow. He is supposedly a Lawful Good Wizard but he claims that murdering this Drow is a lawful good act because “Drow are an evil race by definition”. This was blatantly untrue in our campaign but he went all “rules lawyer” on us when we tried to tell him this wasn’t the case. He also saves the body parts of the NPCs and creatures he or the party kills-including the testicles. He also would CONSTANTLY flirts the Paladin-his sister’s character. We just kind of assumed it was his character decision and she would pretty much just go along with it and we didn’t question it too much until the dumbass LEVEL ONE WIZARD with no armor attempts to block a fucking firebolt to “defend” his full HP Paladin sister who is a whole ass level above him.
So obviously he fucking dies. We almost got TPK’d because of this. We ended up having to BARELY flee the encounter and leave him to the Ogre Thinker to kill him. He then rolls an Artificer. And surprise surprise-he is basically the exact same character except he dropped the pretense of being “Lawful Good” and just went full murderhobo. His flirtation with the Paladin intensified-until he died again-and again. Playing the same Paladin loving murderhobo over and over. He even got to the point where he would basically murder ANYONE who even spoke to her.
At this point we start thinking this is just getting weird. How many characters can you go through before the whole “Its what my character would do” excuse works for hitting on your sister. We end up having a little talk with him about his characters and try to gently steer him into playing something different or flirting with another character. He got really defensive and pissy and basically gave us the whole “iTs wHaT mY cHarAcTer wOuLd dO” excuse. We didn’t want to push this or cause more problems. So we let it go.
Well he kept on escalating until he was making sexual comments about her character. Sexual content is fine in our game but the context was making this increasingly weird. Eventually he made a comment that was clearly related to her irl appearance and not the character so we ended up messaging her to ask her if she wants us to kick him but she said no. Her response was just that he is just “Really in to the roleplay. He really likes you guys too”. Yeah because mindlessly murdering every NPC that mildly annoys him is totally quality RP.
This story doesn’t have a dramatic ending with the problem player going full incel and getting kicked or anything. We are pretty much just playing with a “that guy” and TRYING to keep him from murdering too many important NPCs and ignoring him when he occasionally tries to (badly) be an obnoxious rules lawyer or hit on his sister’s “character”. Thankfully-the DM has basically caught on and most of his shenanigans just lead to him dying. He is now a full 3 levels behind the rest of the party and we pretty much go into combat as if he is not even there.
tldr Socially awkward “that guy” plays a murderhobo that dies constantly due to his own dumbass decisions and won’t stop hitting on his sister’s character. He also is a really bad rules lawyer when he thinks the rules suit him. He is now 3 levels behind the rest of the party due to constantly dying and is pretty much useless in combat.

Currently I work at a mortgage company. And I do ALL the paperwork and talk to the clients but don't "bring in the business" so I don't make commission. I'm a loan officer assistant because I can't rely on commission, I need a salary. But honestly the work sucks because the loan officer doesn't do anything and relies on me for everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. Even outside of the work place. I listen to his personal problems, give advice on his relationship strife, watch his animals when he goes out of town and he even asks me to watch his girlfriend's animals too. I'm in charge of making sure his personal bills get paid - that's all just the tip of the iceberg. He relies on me too much for everything. At this point I'm a full time personal assistant on top of doing all the office work. I'm fed up with it all.
It's hard for me to set boundaries because its just me and him. I don't have any other boss or any coworkers to answer to. But honestly I can't set boundaries with him, its all or none. I can't get another job in the field, this is currently a declining industry and mortgage companies have been laying off people massively/shutting down - so they're not hiring.
I guess I want what everyone wants - a fair salary with decent job security. I don't live in a fantasy where I have to love my job and it has to be fulfilling and make me happy. Does anyone have advice on jobs that are decent (45k salary+) that my skills can transfer to without needing a degree?
I'm 30 now and have been doing this for the last 8 years so it's scary to make a change. I know 30 is still pretty young but I'm not much of a risk taker but I also know if I don't make a change soon it'll only be harder.

My partner and I have been together for alittle over a year and a half. He’s 27 and I’m 23. In the beginning things were great, he was such a great communicator and made a lot of effort to make things work, despite me not being the best partner due to my overthinking and past relationship trauma. He was super patient through it all, planned dates, would come see me 2-3 times a week despite having to drive 1.5 hours each way since I don’t drive yet.
Things started to really change April of 2022, he was extremely distant, would not really communicate during arguments would either shut down/ give me the silent treatment or dismiss the conversation. He wouldn’t come or bring up going out unless I ask, and lessened it to only making the drive 1x a week, I would go to him 1x a week as well and he would drive me home. I’m someone that likes to talk about things right away and come up with a solution so this behavior put me under a lot of stress, when we would argue I would cry and not be able to eat. I It went on for months I went from being 145 to 123 pounds. Of course there were times he would really try which is what kept me going.
A couple months ago I suspected him of cheating so I went through his credit card statements, I saw a dinner transaction at a time when he told me he’s taking a nap. when I confronted him he denied it and said it was with coworkers and for angry with me for invading his privacy which this part I get, but he also lied so it’s like. He’s still holding onto the narrative and even had a coworker confirm through a voice recording. He said he lied about taking a nap because there were going to be female coworkers there and he didn’t want to upset me since we agreed to not hang out with coworkers of the opposite sex outside of work. I still don’t believe it but he offered to share his location with me to prove he’s not doing anything so I tried to make things work since I was also wrong for snooping.
It’s been about 2 months I still feel uneasy about the situation, even though he’s been trying to plan more dates, be more reassuring, talking through arguments instead of shutting down. But it still hasn’t been like it was in the beginning, his patience was what attracted him to me in the first place. His excuse is always we’re past the honeymoon stage so it won’t be the same.
We recently got into a argument this time I didn’t try to fight for the relationship because I am drained, he ended up confessing that he’s been less affectionate and less willing to fix things because he’s not attracted to the weight loss.
I told him how much this hurt me, he apologized he said that wasn’t his intention but he wants to make sure I’m really trying to gain my weight back since he makes sure he looks good for me by going to the gym, which he was already doing. I do look noticeably different from 8 months ago since I lost my hips and my clothes don’t fit anymore.
He also said I’ve said mean things to him that he was able to get over so he knows this is something I can move past as well, he wants things to work which is why is being honest & transparent.
But if we’re talking about marriage, there’s couples who go through physically altering experiences like accidents, cancers who still show their partner the same love and affection. Why should things change over 20 pounds, especially if it was caused by his toxic behaviors.
I get attraction levels fluctuate but it shouldn’t change your attitude towards the person you love.
Should I see this as a deal breaker or can I stick through and make it work?

Hello,
I just wanted to share my story and connect with others that are in the same situation. After reading a lot of threads on here I know my situation is far from unique.
My story
After me and my significant other had been trying to conceive for a couple of months, I ordered one of those at-home sperm tests just to make sure nothing was wrong on my side. In the back of my head, I knew I had an operation as a kid for an undescended testicle that had to be moved down. Maybe that could have affected the quality of my sperm? I still remember seeing the test-liquid that is supposed to turn pink turn dark purple instead. This was the first indication that something was wrong.
I contacted the local fertility clinic and scheduled a semen analysis. I also started reading up on ways to improve sperm quality and numbers. After a week or two it was time to turn in the first sperm sample to the local clinic. The doctor called a day later. I can still remember the moment when he, on speaker phone because my partner was also listening, gave us the results - there was zero sperm found in the sample. It was a shock, to say the least. I went through physical examination - everything seemed perfectly normal according to the doctor. Three additional sperm tests later, since I insisted on more than the regular two, the verdict was clear. Azoospermia.
Then came the tests for hormone levels - all perfectly fine except for...drumroll...you guessed it right, FSH. Nothing out of this world but still too high at around 15. Then came the genetic testing - I got tested for the usual stuff, microdeletions, Klinefelter and so on, but nothing. Completely normal. I then insisted on ultrasound to rule out any possible obstruction, but nope, everything looked fine.
After that I went through a regular TESA. It was not that bad, but came up empty. Nothing was found in the extracted tissue. This is where the doctor brought up alternatives such as adoption or donor. But I wasn't there yet, I had read about the microtese and wanted to make sure I had ruled everyting out. And so then came the microtese, which was done a couple of hours from where we live so we had to do a bit of travel and stay at a hotel. If the TESA was uncomfortable, the microtese was a lot more painful. Not so much during the surgery, which is done under local anesthesia where I live, but afterwards. We drove home the same afternoon, and the doctor called with the results while we were on the road. At this point we were so tired of the whole process and I guess a bit numb after being through all of this that we barely reacted to what the doctor said. It was, of course, unsuccessful. The final diagnosis: Non-obstructive azoospermia, Sertoli Cell Only.
Moving forward
It's been a 15 months long rollercoaster. I'm sure many of you can relate to the waiting for appointments, the waiting for results and the countless nights spent reading scientific studies or other peoples stories.
I have always been open to adoption, long before my diagnosis. It's been a nice thing to fall back on. We have decided to move forward with a donor and have been cleared to start the process in the coming months. It is not the way we thought our journey would look like, but life does not always pan out the way we think. After all the negative tests and all the waiting and all the suffering, it feels good to finally start moving towards creating a family.
I hope some of you can relate to my story and please feel free to ask questions or share your own stories.

I have been dating L for almost 5 months now. L is very sweet and great company, but has many sources of stress and unhappiness in her life: past trauma, health issues, financial worries, and a lack of self esteem. She admits that she often has suicidal thoughts, and has acted on these thoughts during our relationship (which culminated in me driving to her place at the middle of the night to get her to vomit up some pills she had taken).
L often tells me that I make her happy and has even insinuated that I am the only source of happiness in her life. One the one hand I am glad she feels this strongly about me, but on the other hand knowing that she places such importance on our relationship makes me worry that she has become dependent on me.
In the 5 months we have been dating I have tried my best to be supportive. At the end of the day however I have my own issues to deal with, and have struggled with my own mental health a lot in the past (which required a lot of therapy and hard work to stay on top of). To make matters worse, L comes from a very wealthy but somewhat dysfunctional family with whom she has an at times frosty relationship, and I am exasperated at the lack of communication between her and her relatives (with L often being reluctant to ask them for help).
L was recently admitted to hospital for 4 days a chronic health issue, during which time I visited her each day (being the only person to do so). I think this might have been the last straw, as a day or two after she was discharged I experienced a (thankfully brief) bout of depression and feeling of burnout, along with the realisation that something has to change.
I feel awful admitting this, but I feel as though I am taking on too much responsibility this early on in the relationship. L is a wonderful person and none of her problems are her fault, but at times I feel I have practically become a caregiver when we should still be in the honeymoon phase. I can feel myself emotionally checking out of the relationship because I can sense that it is slowly becoming unhealthy and codependent. L refuses to ask for help from her family and leans too much on me, and this early on in the relationship I am not even remotely ready to be someone's sole support system.
L and I had a trip planned for later in the year, which she is very excited about, but I think we need to call it off because I am worried that it will just cement the dynamic of our relationship even more, and because frankly the entire situation is making me too stressed out and anxious to enjoy being on holiday. I feel as though we need to take a step back and get her help addressing the different issues in her life, so that she feels better about herself and does not lean on me to the extent that she does.
How do I navigate things going forward? I am planning on speaking to L in person tomorrow and communicating these feelings to her, as well as encouraging her to approach her family for help. I worry that telling her that we should call the holiday off and take a bit of a step back in our relationship will go down like a lead balloon, and potentially even prompt her to do something drastic (e.g. hurt herself). I would really appreciate any advice on how to handle the situation.
TL;DR Girlfriend of 5 months leans very heavily on me in the relationship and does not seek enough help for life problems from family etc., to the point where it's starting to affect my own mental health. Need to get girlfriend to take a step back and get the help she needs but unsure how to approach the discussion.

Hey everyone, I was wondering if I could get some help regarding a problem I'm having with Portal. I wanted to create a classic BF 1942 experience keeping as much as I could the same from the original game. This included removing all the attachment options, making it so that each faction can only use their specific weapons, removing sliding and traversal sprint, etc. Everything is pretty much perfect except for one issue I can't figure out. I want Battle of The Bulge to be US vs. Germany and El Alamein to be UK vs. Germany, but I can't seem to specify that in the rules. The game forces me to choose either only US or only UK. Does anyone know how I can achieve this? Thanks!

Hi all! Last week I had a very scary experience with a low blood sugar, and I'd like to share my experience and also maybe issue some warnings. To start, I am 26F and have had T1D since I was 4 years old. Overall, my bloodsugars are mostly controlled (A1C~6.5). I am on the Medtronic 770G pump/sensor. However, at the time of this event, I was not wearing the sensor as I had lost my transmitter during travelling a week or so prior and hadn't gotten around to ordering a new one. This is the first time I had an experience like this in my memory. This will be long but it's important to see how easily this can happen and how to avoid mistakes that can lead to it. When I google information, it seems like sometimes a diabetic seizure can just be mild symptoms like confusion, sweating, but mine progressed into a full-blown seizure. (Read https://www.visitcompletecare.com/blog/what-does-diabetic-seizure-look-like/ for some more information.. I feel like I’ve never been formally educated on this in all my years of being a diabetic)
So last Thursday night my blood sugar was high 200s and not going down after bolus, but then I realized I had to change my site anyway so maybe that's why. Changed site, gave a little more insulin, kept checking every 30 mins-1hr or so and it was now in the 300s and not going down. At this point I decided to change my site again and lo and behold, the tube was bent and not even in my skin. Put on a new site, gave the amount of insulin to treat >300 BG since I knew I hadn't gotten any insulin for hours at that point. It was late and I was tired, so I waited until I knew for sure my BG was going down before I went to sleep. It was going down so slowly, but once it hit 240 around 1am I was too tired and knew it would be fine as it's obviously going down. I put a juice by my bedside in the event I overcorrected since I ALWAYS wake up when my bloodsugar gets too low while sleeping.
Well, not this time. The next time I woke up was around 4 am to 4 paramedics in my room. My partner had to fill me in on the details and thanks to him this all turned out okay. So I guess around 3:30am, my partner woke up to me banging my arm on the nightstand (I was laying on my side). He said I was thrashing pretty violently, and while he has no prior experiences with seizures, he assumed that's what was happening. I wasn't coherent and my eyes were open but not looking at anything. So he got up to check on me and I was half hanging off the bed, so he moved me more on the bed and then realized how sweaty I was. That's always a big indication for me that my bloodsugar is very low. So at this point he did figure I was having a seizure, but then also realized my BG was low, but at this point he hadn't put everything together. He checked my BG.. he actually tried to do it in my upper thigh at first because my arms were moving too much. Didn't work though but he did get it from my finger. My meter just read "Call 911" instead of giving a number. So here he said that within 40 seconds he learned low blood sugars can cause seizures! What a great way to learn, through experience lol. He said I thrashed pretty violently for maybe like 5 mins, then eventually it changed to smaller tremors and during this whole time I was in/out of consciousness. So he called 911 as the meter instructed, and medics were there within 4 mins.
Here I should point out, that yes, this would've been a good time for a glucagon treatment. While I do have one, it was expired, and my partner didn't exactly know where it was. So instead of wasting time looking for it, while he was on phone with the operator he put some sugar in my mouth to let it soak into my gums (note- at this point I wasn't fully seizing anymore and I was still on my side, and since the sugar melts he figured it was safe enough to put in my mouth as it wasn't much. I'm still not sure if this is the best idea, but we plan to get a sugar gel in case it ever happens again).
So once the medics arrived, they gave me a glucagon shot (at least we assume, my partner wasn't sure and was overwhelmed) and some glucose gel. After this they checked my BG and it was 20! So it must have been even lower before that. I think the lowest my BG has ever been is like 35ish? I guess at this point I was cooperating but still mostly out of it, and I don't remember this. I started coming to a couple of minutes later and I thought I was dreaming that there were medics in my room. Then I realized I had a terrible, sweet taste in my mouth, and I scratched my nose and felt sugar around my mouth. At this point I realized it was not a dream, and I am being treated for a bad low. I started communicating with the medics and my partner at this point, but no one necessarily told me everything that happened. Then they gave me an IV of some clear glucose liquid. I remember it took awhile for them to find a good vein and I also remember not feeling it at all. Then they started asking me questions (Name, date, who's the president, etc) and I was able to answer. They said this IV is supposed to raise my BG really fast and then I need actual food to keep it up. To give you an idea, it went up to 350 while getting the IV, and within a couple minutes it was already back down to 240ish. I had a couple of granola bars (I was starving at this point, wanting to do a low binge). At this point they also explained I had a seizure due to the low blood sugar which definitely surprised me. Medics stayed a couple more mins to ensure I was stable and offered to take me to hospital, but at that point I was all there and my BG started equilibrating, so I declined. I talked to my partner for a little bit and he gave me the rest of the details about how he woke up, the actual seizure, how my dogs would be terrible medical alert dogs because they slept through the whole thing (lol), etc. Then I quickly fell asleep.
The next day I woke up with a BG of 460 so my day already started off feeling lovely hah. But once that was fixed, I was physically exhausted and had a headache all day.
Now that it’s been a few days, I’ve had time to reflect about all this. It was weird the first day or two because I didn’t remember or wasn’t conscious for the worst of it. So it almost didn’t feel real? Or didn’t feel that scary, even though I knew it was a scary situation in general. I’m very thankful my partner woke up and was able to help because of course we don’t wanna think about the worst that could’ve happened.. What really scares me is if I was alone that night for some reason. We’ve lived together for 2-3 years now, but before that I lived alone (no roommates) for 2 years. Over the years I’ve been with him, he has of course become familiar with diabetes and understands most of the signs of high/low bg (like the sweating from that night), and I’m also glad I had taught him how to check my bloodsugar. He also knew it was best to get any kind of sugar in me as possible, and we had previously discussed that you can use plain sugar because it melts and absorbs into the gums. However, we had never formally discussed an action plan if something like this happened, probably because I never thought about it happening like it did. Like he knew about the existence of the glucagon, but didnt know where I kept it or how to use it if he had found it.
Another thing that could’ve prevented this was me wearing my sensor. I must admit that I go through phases of wearing it for awhile, then not wearing it for a while, and it cycles like that. I want to reiterate that every other time I’ve gotten a low bloodsugar while sleeping, I wake up. Usually in a puddle of sweat, starving. And to be honest, it doesn’t seem like the issues the night before should’ve caused me to drop that low. I didn’t think I’d given myself too much, and it was previously dropping very slowly. I guess it just dropped so fast that I didn’t wake up in time? So I guess I put a little too much trust in my body. The day after this happened I ordered a new transmitter, which should arrive tomorrow. But each night I am so anxious about going to bed, afraid it could happen again. So I have a feeling that going forward I will be much better about wearing the sensor, no matter how annoying it is.
So after all this, I guess I have some advice for my fellow T1Ds:

1. Make sure your friends, family, partners, etc. know what to do in a situation of either low or high blood sugar. Make sure they know your tells, let them know where you keep snacks/juice, etc. I’ve always been really good about doing this, especially if I meet people in a new situation where no one knows me. In addition, having a formal plan for anyone you may live with, telling them how to use glucagon, etc (this is where I realized the obvious shortcomings of not having a formal plan).
2. Keep a glucagon on hand in an easy to find place, not expired, and make sure someone knows how to use it!
3. On that note, keeping a glucose gel is also good, as it may be easier for someone to administer. Also much easier to carry around with you in pocket/purse. You can also encourage people you’re around a lot to keep some on them. I’ve never actually used these but will definitely get some. If someone is unconscious/unresponsive due to a low BG, this is a very easy way to get sugar into them safely, instead of trying to get them to eat or drink something.
4. Wear the damn sensor if you have one. They’re annoying as hell but I suppose they can truly be life saving, especially if you live alone!
5. When in doubt, just call 911 (or your country-specific emergency line). Low blood sugars are common occurrences that are easy for them to treat. I didn't even have to get an ambulance or hospital bill and was fully treated at home. But also, of course go to the hospital if you need to!

If you stuck around this long, thank you for reading! I hope your nights are full of good bloodsugars!

Warning: Opinions are present, proceed with caution
TL;DR: Although the feeling of getting a red item is often great, because of their rarity and generally being interesting items, it's really kind of unusually rare that it will actually end up helping out your run at all.
I know the gut reaction to the title, it just sounds wrong, every time a red item drops I'm willing to bet that all of us get a bit of a dopamine hit, but how often do you just end up being let down?
Even the items that used to feel amazing and like my run was instantly won, now lead to my run being very much loseable despite me still being hyped whenever I see them drop.
I'm not saying that the red items changed in any sort of way honestly, it's purely that I've gotten better at the game, and therefore I'm more likely to play monsoon/eclipse, and I don't enjoy just looping 50 times for the hell of it anymore. Yes in edge/silly cases, they can end up popping off super hard, and feel amazing, but it feels like that rarely ever comes up unless the run is already going nuts.
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I get that this is partly intentional design, and leads to the skill-based nature of ror2 gameplay loop, but we'd be lying if we were to say that those rng high rolls weren't a key part of any roguelike's appeal (yes, obviously they still happen in a different way, more that it's unusual reds don't really end up being a major influence when they appear).
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Obviously, ror2 has its own really neat way of treating item rarities where white items are the foundation of your build and where you get most of your stats and power, with green items then being the means through which you translate the power of your white items into an exponentially better build, with reds at the wildcard which can steer your build into performing amazingly in one area. However, it feels more like in practice they're the sprinkles on top of your build. Like, they're nice to have, but rarely make much of a difference as to whether your build is good or bad.
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In comparison, greens seem to be forced into their role such that they "seem" on average weaker than reds because so many of them are just scrap fodder that waters down the roster (stealthkit, polyp, lepton, harpoon, leeching seed to name a few) which are rarely of any use unless you have a super specific situation. If you look at all the items that don't fall into this category, you'll see that practically all of them are extremely strong, flexible, potentially run-changing items (wotw, bands, atg, uke, feather, shuriken) which I would honestly prefer to many (if not most) reds.
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To clarify, I do not have a specific solution in mind, nor am I claiming this is a game-ruining flaw, if anything this could be entirely intentional in terms of balancing. If it makes more sense to you this way, treat this post as just an observation on an unusual pattern in ror2 item balance
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To illustrate my point, I've gone ahead like a nerd and wrote out my perspective on how impactful each of the red items are. This is the end of the post basically, feel free to not read the rest unless you want my lukewarm take on red items. I just feel like when you look at them all side by side my argument seems much more reasonable:

• * 57 Leaf Clover: Best item in the game right? Well I am trash but I've gotten smacked in MANY runs where I've gotten a clover, although it's amazing with even just a few synergy items, and keeps getting better the more you have, you do need to have them, and something like a band build, or any other build that doesn't rely heavily on random chance items, or if you just get unlucky with collecting crit items, and 57 leaf clover may not shine until you would've otherwise won anyways. In most situations in runs that haven't looped yet, although you would be happier to find a clover, realistically it is unlikely that a good green items wouldn't overall boost your build much more.
• * Aegis: Really bad. I mean I get that you can do funny things with it and I like that it exists to enable meme builds as well as being one of the only good ultra-late game post-loop defensive items, but even though it's decent in that scenario, at that point you a. rarely need it b. could easily get oneshot regardless c. isn't even as good as other lower quality items such as safer spaces, ruckler, opal, even elixir. Also, even more points taken away for being usually worse than a single brooch in eclipse.
• * Alien head: good sometimes, but honestly never build defining. Only time it's really amazing is when it helps you pass certain breakpoints like mercenary iframe godmode or pillar skip, but otherwise it's just nice to have and doesn't really massively buff you. If anything, it's nice to have super early game when you don't have many damage items, but later on it can be restricted by band timers for example. I would say very rarely does alien head end up being better than a good green.
• * Ben's raincoat: kind of the same as alien head, it's nice, but nothing incredible. It's easy for it to get bonked off and block something inconsequential while letting through a massive imp bleed, but then let through a lethal status, kind of like tougher times (status effects are less predictable than damage imo so I think it is worse than safer spaces). Honestly, depending on how you see it, it's either only good on, or useless on characters that have a self-status effects like corrupted void fiend, but I'd be suprised if anyone thought ben's is a run changing item.
• * Bottled Chaos: The ONLY practical use for this absolute troll of an item is pillar skipping with vase while keeping a good equipment. Even in equipment cd builds like fmp soulbound or gesture sillyness, it ends up being unbearable because of the forced volcanic egg, and rarely reliable or really that strong, feels like it's more of a lunar item than anything.
• * Brainstalks: I want to like this item so bad but it really sucks so much. Yes there are a couple of edge cases where it's cool like slicing winds merc or nuking the world with diablo, but at best these are just neat interactions and practically never actually that good or reliable enough unless the run is so won that you don't even need to really use many abilities at all. Even many fun theoretical applications end up being mediocre because of the 0.5s global cooldown ruining it.
• * Behemoth: Great item, you're usually happy to see this, at worst it's just a slight bump to your aoe, at best it massively increases your procs. It's not always or even probably that frequent that it completely makes your run, but it's still so consistently good I'd say it lives up to its color.
• * Ceremonial Dagger: Everyone's said it before me, but this is the classic case of the item seeming strong because it lets you walk away from your pc on a god run, while actually doing not much unless you have a lot of items that help make it work, at which point you were probably doing pretty well already.
• * Dio's: Not the most exciting item but it's definitely always strong and useful, befitting of being a red, is an actual good defensive item red (might be the only one tbh) because late game you usually get oneshot if you take a big hit.
• * Frost Relic: Suprisingly enough, although it's not super exciting, one of the more applicable reds to get, at least without having already borderline won the game. Provides a hefty cushion against melee enemies, a really strong source of damage, good interactions with a variety of items, yeah it's not the flashiest but it's definitely always good to get, even without having a god run going. Unfortunate part is it sucks when stacked unless you get a LOT.
• * Headstompers: Contender for the best item in the game, probably the best *single* item in the game, stupid damage such that it's always your best ability, even without that, the fall damage removal and jump height is so massive for limitless reasons such as trimp pillar skips. It's not just an amazing red item it's like one and a half amazing red items in one. Also amazing on eclipse for obvious reasons.
• * Happiest Mask: So rare that you get any use out of this, sucks when stacked, bad in general, never reliable, less useful than most greens. It's fun for the memes when you've basically already won the game but it's never a serious good item, it can even kill you by having your ghosts backstab you like the dunestrider sucking you (not sure if these got patched)
• * Hardlight Afterburner: Situationally amazing, but never necessary to making a build work. The most consistent value/highest impact you get out of this is either on loader or to enable pillar skip, quite frequently it ends up being dead weight. Feels like a green item with buffed stats, although some utilities are too strong for a green to give more stacks so idk.
• * Desk Plant: Not exciting, but I guess not terrible either? Healing sucks in general in eclipse unfortunately but it's still one of the better healing items, you can't tell me you're really ever happy to see this unless you have, like, some stupidly specific build with fmp/rejuv/n'kuhana's. Also stacking does not increase the heal, albeit the stacks aren't useless.
• * Laser Scope: The only crit item that does not give crit chance, I really don't get it. This one writes itself, it can be really good, but needs setup, and the more it's good, the more likely you are to already be having a run that would be amazing without it.
• * N'kuhana's: Unusable on eclipse, bad otherwise, healing in ror2 is generally kinda underwhelming and rarely saves you past first couple of stages, stacks kinda shittily too, and requires a massive setup to have any value (not even really worth it, i'd still scrap useless healing items)
• * Pocket ICBM: Ridiculously strong item, probably to the point where it's a little out of line, but only *if* you already have one of three specific build conditions that make it great, but otherwise a red paperweight. Most consistent way to get value is probably shrimp, with atg also decent, if you're trying to make fireworks work you need a caffeinator or some other setup, dml is good but doesn't compare to the others. So it's good, but fairly situational, so you'll often get it and have no use for it.
• * Rejuv Rack: No one's happy to see this. I'm kind of confused as to why it's a red, it's so out of place compared to the other reds even just in that it's litteraly just a stat change. Healing is bad in general, which makes this unnecessary and bad outside of very specific builds, also additionally extremely bad in eclipse of course.
• * Resonance Disc: Straight up not good. Like it can be fun sometimes to see it get a big proc off, but it's so inconsistent, and the conditions for it to proc are so arcane and stringent, I'd rather have any of atg/uke/wotw/bands any day.
• * Sentient Meat Hook: Good for same reason as uke and atg, kind of a bastard child of both but also can be uniquely powerful in some situations. It's definitely strong, and mostly feels like a red because it's like those two greens in one. It's not that crazy on its own though, and in a lot of applications a small stack of atgs could probably outperform it, it stacks well but weirdly.
• * Shattering Justice: Noticeable and potent DPS boost, most survivors on most builds can reliably proc it enough to get some value, but even at its best it boils down to a damage multiplier, in the same way crit/atg/bands/etc. are. It's definitely not bad, and it's uniquely strong on survivors that have high uptime with the debuff, but again, it's nothing run-making, and often less consequential than a strong green.
• * Soulbound Catalyst: So unbearably situational albeit a really fun item when you get it going, you're either really happy or sad to see this drop. The most nuts synergy it had, fmp, got nerfed even, although it still works and even works with other actives like dml. But it's in that weird spot without FMP where before mithrix it's literally just a minor time saver if you've found the meta actives (recyclecard), and not useful really at mithrix when you'd want a combat equipment because you're starved for resets. So either specifically with FMP and other on-kill items, or an okayish crutch item with a damage equipment to get you through the early game, and otherwise not useful.
• * Spare Drone Parts: You know there's something weird with reds when this is one of the more generally applicable reds. It's not bad early-mid game although obviously has little impact in already god-runs (not that you need it). Uniquely good because you actually get to *choose* ways to get more value out of it by buying drones, or fishing for a gun to use on solus, as well as other items it synergizes with.
• * Scorpion: Basically a more extreme shattering justice, and therefore more situational. The dps bump on builds that make good use of it is so much bigger than shattering justice that the general consensus is that it's a "better" item (I would agree). I guess this is probably because despite being situational it enables a really powerful combination beyond just being a flat damage multiplier.
• * Tesla Coil: Similar to ceremonial daggers, but actually really strong in most cases even without a crazy amount of synergies unlike ceremonials. It does need some items to proc but even still it's flexible enough to be an all around good item. I still wouldn't necessarily say it outclasses the stronger greens. Kind of sucks that it's not useful for mithrix and can even get you killed phase 4 if you're not careful.
• * Wake of Vultures: Same unreliability as brainstalks, but instead of giving you a buff that can be situationally pretty powerful, gives you a buff that is somewhat difficult to anticipate and isn't even that strong. Especially given short duration it's completely unpractical, pretty much always a novelty practically never useful except by accident on rare occasions, most likely value tbh is to yoink perfected from mobs so you can't take fall damage on the moon if you suck like me and fall.

​
So in total, if you were to open a large chest on first loop, without an already strong build, and got a big dopamine rush from seeing the red droplet, what are you actually going to end up with? If you high roll, you would get the 4/26 items that are a really huge boost to your power no matter what. Otherwise, you could end up with the 5/26 chance for an item that's at least a bump in power, but requires a few items to be really impactful, or instead, the same 5/26 chance for an item that could be decent as long as you're lucky enough to be already building items that work well with it, albeit the ones I'd put in this category have prerequisites that are fairly common and rather achievable in builds at this point. Otherwise? You're really kind of out of luck, rolling either a 7/26 chance for an at least helpful mostly inconsequential item (or one that is very difficult to get value from), or worst case, the 5/26 items with practically no impact at all (especially if you're on eclipse).
So in this situation, you'd have a less than one fifth chance to get an item that will just give you a big power increase no matter what, almost a 50/50 chance of getting an item that will do basically nothing, and the remaining two fifths-ish of the items are wildly inconsistent and can range from barely any use to actually pretty good if you have the right situation, but if you're hoping for a red item to turn an unlucky run around, the odds are really not great, you're more likely to claw back into the game with good greens if anything.

Background: My (21F) boyfriend (21M) and I have been dating for almost a year and a half now. I thought my parents liked him, and that he liked my parents. Recently I’ve learned that’s not entirely the case. Despite my boyfriends efforts to be polite, my mom still doesn’t like him, and I’m not sure how my dad feels. My mom apparently hates him because she feels like he is going to turn me into a housewife, he’s from a traditional church denomination which believes women can’t lead in the church, but my boyfriend and I have discussed this at length and have reached a consensus we are both pleased with. My mom doesn’t seem to hear me saying that. Additionally, she thinks he has immature friends, doesn’t make wise spending decisions, and thinks his family is too personal. His friends can be immature, but they just recently stopped speaking to the only one of that group that I didn’t like. He does tend to spend all money he is gifted (I was taught to save a portion and spend a portion), but money he earns through work he does save. His family is kind to me, they care about my opinion, text me to check in, and congratulate me when I have good things happen. I’m not used to this. My parents are closed off, the most I usually get is “we expected excellence anyways,” - I didn’t realize parents actually praised their children.
Long story short, I don’t know who to choose here. My mom is my mom, she has provided for me and although our relationship is strained by many actions she has taken that would take too long to type, I still love her. But I love my boyfriend too. My mom has threatened to cut off money and has told me to not expect holiday visits or a wedding from her if I continue dating this person. She’s mad about him, my boyfriend is mad about her now that he knows how she feels, and I’m mad at the world and honestly just want to crawl into a hole. My mom has never voiced these concerns to my boyfriend, she hardly speaks to him when he has come with me to visit. She won’t even accept his friend request on Facebook. So I don’t feel like she’s tried to get a good look at who he actually is. But she’s my mom, and I want to trust her opinion. My boyfriend thinks she narcissistic. I don’t know who to trust. Any advice would be great.
TLDR: My mom and boyfriend despise one another, I’m stuck mediating between them and things are just escalating. I don’t know who to side with.

Good afternoon!
I'd like to show my build that I played in 3.20. This build does a number of cool things that I thought the community would enjoy.
This build features very large poisons by using 6x Low Tolerance notables in our cluster jewels. We have a ton of "Faster Poison" stats across our character to bring our poison duration down to around 1 second. Alchemist Mark scales off the damage per second of the largest poison on the target which makes the ground effect do most of our damage. We are running Grace+Determination+Defiance Banner for defenses as well as being Suppression capped.
Other interesting notes:

• Most of poison chance comes from Herald of Agony alt quality with Ashes of the Stars.
• Leap Slam is linked to Brutality so that you wont accidentally poison enemies while hopping around.
• I got insanely lucky with my Relic. It gives 12% mana reservation efficiency and 8% increased curse effect. This scales our Despair and boosts the damage of our Alchemist Mark. Without the relic you'd have to pick up the Grace Reservation Efficiency node in the Evasion Mastery.
• You have to wait for poisons to fall off before hitting an enemy each time due to Low Tolerance. After a while you get a hang of how long your poison durations are.
• To maximize DPS, I would hand cast Despair, use Withering Step to apply Wither, Cast Alchemist Mark, Hit with Vaal Cleave or Cleave. It is important to use Withering Step before Cleave so it goes on cooldown.
• The duration of the wither stacks applied by Withering Step last 3 seconds and the cooldown is 2.97 seconds. You won't always have it applied but so long as you always hit right as you press Withering Step you can approach 100% uptime.
• Since Echoforge doesn't allow us to do Physical Damage, we have to convert all Phys to Chaos to make use of all the Damage on the weapon. We have 100% Phys to Chaos conversion from Ascendency(40%), Chaos Mastery(40%), and Eater of Worlds Glove Implicit(20%).
• We are immune to all elemental ailments, hinder, corrupted blood, stun, and bleeding.
• This build would be unplayable without Poison proliferation from pathfinder ascendency.
• All the rare items (not including jewels) were crafted by me! Let me know if you have any questions about how I made them. Oh...not the belt actually. I tried to craft it but gave up after spending way too much. Then some guy was selling this one for 3 divines.
• This character cost a little over 400 divines.

Path of Building: https://pastebin.com/9Tmm967p
Strand t16 Map(I ran this exactly as I would without recording): https://youtu.be/dMzgY9vXbU4
Minotaur Map: https://youtu.be/0-m07K0y67s

I’m not sure if I’m the only with this issue one here, but I’m realising that my mother has never really given me marriage advice or even dating advice. You know how some mother’s will tell their daughters to marry a rich guy, or make sure he opens the door for you when you’re dating etc. you get the gist of it! She has never done that.
She has never given me advice when it comes to school/university or simply weighed the pros and cons of the courses that I wanted to study. Like she doesn’t even ask technical questions, such as “What modules, what career can you go into” etc. She didn’t even know what I was studying before I went to university.
What annoys me is, I told her about a situation between me and a friend, a few days ago, and she just said “well I’m not really sure. Was she angry?” and then, she kind of just agreed with whatever I had to say about the situation.
One thing she will always say though, is people are jealous and that people are “evil” and I shouldn’t trust anyone. And that we should pray often
It annoys me because she has never been that mother to advise me about marriage. Yes she was married, with the same guy (my dad) for years, so she knows about marriage.
Even little funny things mothers like to advice their daughters like “make sure your man has money”, she never does.
I just find it super strange… it’s like her head is empty. Anyone else with similar stories or situations?

Hello there, I am in a bit of a strange situation and am seeking some advice. About 3 months ago, I went into PetSmart and was just looking around at the different fish for fun, when I noticed a male betta with one blind eye.
I picked him up and looked at him and he is the sweetest little guy. I felt really bad for him, but I honestly wasn’t looking for another pet and am not familiar with fish care too much. I put him back and hoped someone else more experienced would adopt him.
Over the span of the last 3 months though, every time I have gone, I noticed the other fish would be gone, but he was still there. It seemed no one wanted him. Today when I went in, I noticed that not only was he still there, but he was in absolutely filthy water. It was completely yellow with gunk all inside of it and I felt horrible for him.
He had been inside this tiny cup for at least 3 months (who knows how long he was there before I noticed him) and he wasn’t being cared for properly whatsoever. When he swims, he leans to the left a bit because he can only see out of his left eye. I made the decision right then that I was taking him home.
They gave him to me for 50% off and I grabbed a starter kit for now until I can get him something better when I get my paycheck. However, as mentioned above, I’m not really familiar with betta care. I just didn’t want to leave him in that condition anymore and I figured a clean, somewhat larger tank would be better than a dirty plastic cup.
So far, he is seeming happier in his new tank and he was stoked once I gave him some food. He’s currently still exploring the new tank as well and it makes me happy to see him out of the cup at least.
I’m wondering if anyone here has any tips or advice on caring for this little guy? He is a white “platinum” male betta. Aside from his one eye being blind, he seems healthy aside from that. Any advice would be greatly appreciated (:

I (M19) have had a rocky relationship with my parents as far as I can remember, I don't know where or how it all started or who is to be blames for it but it has always been like that for me. As parents they've helped me at certain times and stages like any parent would do for their child, but most of the times they've done things for me that I never asked for, making it a forceful situation for me to do that thing. Half a month ago, they decided to send me to UK for my educational degree. Turns out, I hate every bit of it here because the field of degree they've chosen for me wasn't what I wanted to do. So I got tired of it all and started cutting classes and missing out on assignments, and for the first 4 months I was in contact with them basically for allowances. But later I decided to contact them only when I ran out of money and cut off contact again when I had received the money. I have a part time job, but they the pay hasn't come yet so they are my source. I think like they owe at least that much, for not asking me what I wanted and considering the value of my choice for Mt future. AITA?

Got a question for the zil team: In worst case scenario and all the US$ stablecoins fail, how does xsgd scale? and could it be a stablecoin which everyone is going to use? I don't know the technical details on this, so maybe I'm asking a dumb question. But in case of a stablecoin collapse, zil could profit hugely from this if people switch over to xsgd on masse. Also, is it disclosed somewhere what zilliqa uses as backing for it's xsgd and is it backed 100%?
Backstory: Binance phases out busd. Usdt is too big to fail, but can't really trust them. which makes usdc the only 'trustworthy' big stablecoin. Allthough with the US banks being in a sticky situation, that could turn quite fast, like we seen last week. In case more banks go under and usdc+usdt lose alot of liquidity, people will have somewhere to go. Could xsgd carry all this?
Offcouse in the worst-worst case scenario and the dollar falls because of the banking crisis, the signapore dollar will also collapse because alot of the signaporean reserves are in US$. So this question is in case the stablecoins fail because of banking crisis, but the dollar survives.

A good question I just heard from someone regarding church tradition is if most of the church fathers that form the backbone of our tradition come from mainly Latin speaking areas and weren’t hardly knowledgeable in Greek and Hebrew or Aramaic. Let alone came centuries after the life of Christ and the second temple period, wouldn’t that make them less knowledgeable than basically all modern scholars? What would be your response to this? How far back does patristics and stuff like that go? Cause if all that is true an argument can be made that we don’t really need to listen to church fathers but rather scholars (I listen to both anyways but I digress) thoughts?

Does anyone have any tips on exercising while on tretinoin? I’ve been using tret (gel 0.0025%) for about a month now and am experiencing light peeling.
On top of the peeling I feel like I’m drying out my face too much because I like to wash my face before I workout and then rinse with water after, but it feels tight when I do this. I will then wash my face/moisturize again before bed.
If I don’t wash my face before I workout then I feel like the oil in my t zone mixed with the sweat will make me break out too. Of note I like to exercise in the evenings around 3 pm and by that point I feel a little oily.
Anyone else with oily acne prone skin have a routine that works well and doesn’t dry them out?

[[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]) — — -Sometimes students fail their exams due to low-quality grades, which has a detrimental effect on their future life.
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The question that is on every student’s mind is how to change grades. I need a hacker to change my university grades. There are several ways to do this. You can discuss with the professor or deal with a third party like a writing agency, or you can use your academic knowledge and write your paper yourself. If you want to get good results without any trouble, then it is best. But if you want a good result without doing this then you need to hire a good hacker. The hacker will change your grade according to your needs. You do not have to do anything about this.
[[email protected]](mailto:[email protected])
I need a hacker to change my university grades
I need a hacker to change my university grade but now the question may come where can I find a hacker? Finding a professional hacker is a little difficult. Many hacker services or agencies can be found by searching online. But the amount of trusted hackers is very low. I have an explication for this problem.
Can I hire a hacker to change a grade?
This will be the question presented to you when you need to change the school grade. Being a university, college or high school student is a matter of stress and many students understand the pain of bad grades. A poor final grade can be devastating for undergraduate and career dynamics.
Having the mentality of not graduating and having to repeat difficult exams forces students to look for hackers to change school grades and worldwide statistics are on the high-grade change. It is very easy to find a hacker on the internet and accept his services. Anyone can do this at home through their mobile and net.
You need to believe in yourself that you can learn to change your grades without any help. Online grades can be changed to show your parents’ grades. Students often search like this, I need a hacker to change my university grade.
Hackers are breaking borders and connecting the world within short distances. School grade exploitation is a common thing. Achieving your goals requires skills and techniques to change your grades and unique software. What is common in school grade changes? The goal is to get good grades. Did you finalize the score? The truth is that despite the efforts of universities to secure their grading systems, grades are now more accessible to hackers than ever before.
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How to choose a professional hacker?
There are real hackers to hack grades and increase your GPA in your college and university. We have noticed that a new generation of hackers now has websites in addition to the Deep Web.
We all know the stories that originated from the Dark Web of software, malicious apps, and other infamous items that go down. I would not recommend hiring a hacker a second time to change my school grades from the Dark Web. It’s a notorious initiative that I wouldn’t encourage anyone to do, but it really helps through the platform when I use the best method of hiring hackers to change my school grades.
Why hire a hacker to change grades
Grade change is considered to be the best thing for students around the world. To become a hacker you need prerequisite skills. Grade change is invalid and when changing your grade, just consider changing your grade and not everyone’s grade in the class. When you need a hacker to change your university grade, think of professional ethical hackers for hire.
Changing university grades for hacker recruitment would not be the final step. To increase GPA you need to consider your grades with simple strategies. How to hire a hacker to change a university grade is a step in the right direction if you consider identification. You can take any hacker to help you monitor the steps.
Finally, students find it difficult to get their grades. The study will not depend on you changing grades from hackers. When you are a student, you can change your score from F to A or you increase your grades. This effect when you are a student.
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How to buy fake grades and fake college certificates online
I need a hacker to change my university grades. If this transcript is available online, how is it? There are online shop outlets that provide top services for buying fake birth certificates, fake college certificates, and fake diplomas. Many students buy this certificate if they cannot afford to hack school grades. Some students do not know that school computers can be hacked.
There are a lot of questions about “Can you make a fake copy” Yes if you can’t pay for grade-up hacking then we can make a diploma for you. We provide top solutions as a professional hacking service on replication including sealing and verification.
How to hack university database system to change grades
Hacking school systems means you need to know about cybersecurity, database protocols, and much more. Hackers can easily do this for you. Adjust your college grades, transcripts. If they are some hackers who can easily access the database and I would advise you to ask which method. First of all, don’t choose the cruel power, it can tear down the school’s server and slow down its website.
Is it possible to hack the school system and change your grade? Someone asked this question on a popular online Q&A website. The answer is — yes! And you are really lucky to have found this article. This content gives you a simple, safe, and effective solution on how to hire a hacker to change your university grades. This is the best and most informative article you will find online on this topic. Hire a hacker today [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected])
How to hire a hacker to change the transcript
I need a hacker to change my university grades, what comes to your mind when you want to hack the school system? There are different methods applicable to school grades. What do you claim, the total overhauling of your grades, the increase in GPA? So, when changing your grades, you should also keep this advice in mind from the advice in this article: When hacking grades, hacking your own score will have a huge impact on other students which will cause problems for you.
It may sound ridiculous but it is true. Hacking is not like the movie in the real world and it is a bit difficult and working. You should consider a professional to look after your work. Some students make some mistakes when it comes to grade change and at first, they choose the key-logger, although it seems cool if you try to hack your teacher I would recommend not using this method. Hire a hacker if possible or use online hacking training for this purpose.
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Hire a hacker to change university grade
The result I have chosen for professional change is that you can use highly skilled individuals or groups and these groups know their categories. If you hire a hacker to change your university grades, all you need to know is:
Hiring professional hackers to change university grades would not be the final step. Your grades should be considered along with simple strategies to increase your GPA. How to hire a hacker to change university grades is a step in the right direction you need to consider on your own.
Students find it difficult to get their grades. The study will not depend on you changing grades from hackers. When you are a student, you can change your score from F&A to this effect when you are a student.
In short
There are opinions and disagreements about hacking your school website. Changing your grades requires your experience and skills to securely hack your school portal. Alternatively, you can hire a professional hacker to hack school, college, and university grades.
Conclusion
At this age where everyone races to get good grades and then get good jobs. Your results play an essential role to get a good job. No worries if you have a low-quality grade. You can easily change the grade by hiring a hacker.
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Hey everyone, I was wondering if I could get some help regarding a problem I'm having with Portal. I wanted to create a classic BF 1942 experience keeping as much as I could the same from the original game. This included removing all the attachment options, making it so that each faction can only use their specific weapons, removing sliding and traversal sprint, etc. Everything is pretty much perfect except for one issue I can't figure out. I want Battle of The Bulge to be US vs. Germany and El Alamein to be UK vs. Germany, but I can't seem to specify that in the rules. The game forces me to either choose only US or only UK. Does anyone know how I can achieve this? Thanks!

TLDR; I was in love with my gf, she broke up with me. We were apart for a year and some change before we reconciled and started dating. Now we have been together for about 7 years total and I’m hesitant on marriage. May be influenced by someone else.
I apologize in advance that some detail will have to be omitted for privacy concerns. This will also be a long story as I am very confused and have never been in this type of situation before.
We began dating when we were young, 24 and 21. Previously to her, I was in multiple relationships where she was in one serious one that ended a few months prior to us dating. We virtually skipped over any honeymoon phase due to personal reasons on my end, and jumped straight into a serious relationship. Over the next few years, I swore I was going to marry this woman. She was everything I was looking for at the time. Smart, beautiful, sociable, and my family loved her. She had the qualities that would make her an excellent mother and wonderful wife.
Even though we’ve had common relationship problems, there was never a moment where we had huge disagreements. Over the years we grew extremely close with each other. When she finished up her degree, she had an opportunity to intern in a different state on the opposite side of the country from where we lived at the time. I was still in school finishing up my degree. We also both lived with our parents at the time due to financial reasons. I was so excited for her to start this internship, as it would be an excellent stepping stone into the career she wanted. She, on the other hand, was nervous about being long distance for about a year, but I ensured her we were strong enough and communicate well enough for us to make it a year. I was wrong.
Finances were tight, but I made every effort to try and fly out to visit her as often as I could. I would also try to set up times to text/call/FaceTime but with the time differences it became difficult. I was ahead by 3 hours and often went to sleep early so I could commute to school. I flew out one last time to celebrate her birthday, and it was quite possibly one of the most miserable weeks of my life. I’ve never felt so unloved, uncared for, and disregarded in my life. I felt like I was sleeping with a stranger. We barely touched each other, she walked ahead of me as we were exploring the city, and basically ignored me when I met her new group of friends.
I flew home, called her and told her how I felt. I told her I understood we are in a rough patch but she was the woman of my dreams and I want to fight for what we had. She blindsided me by absolutely breaking my heart. At this point we were together for a little over 3 years. I was devastated. Confused. Broken. At this time, I have no idea if she was cheating on me. I never cared to ask.
Fast forward in time about a year. She’s reached out a few times but I basically kept things short. I had a new job that paid well, and was focused on meeting new people. Covid hit, and she found herself back home and she reached out me to see if I wanted to meet up and talk. Every logical fiber in my body was telling me to run, but my emotions overcame me and against my better judgement I agreed to meet and talk. I never asked if someone else was the cause of the break up, or what her rationale was. I also never asked if she saw someone while we were apart, mostly because we were broken up and I was talking to other people as well. We ended up reconciling and began dating again.
We ended up moving in together after some time. During this period I thought everything was back to normal. However, I noticed I would not tell people I was in a relationship unless specifically asked. If I did tell someone, I kept it insanely minimal. I would find excuses to change the subject or would say I keep my work and private life separate, which I very much do. But omitting information such as being in a serious relationship should’ve got me thinking something was wrong beforehand.
We were living together when I sprung the news I had to move to a new state to finish grad school, and she uprooted her entire life to move with me and support me, partially because of what happened in our past.
To put things into perspective, we’ve now been together a little over 7 years total. We’ve discussed marriage, children, future goals, the works. I would’ve married her, but there has always been something that made me hesitant. Now I do love her, she is still an amazing person despite what we’ve been through.
To complicate the situation, before we left, a woman who I found attractive at work exchanged contact information with me and we’ve been talking more frequently. The field I work in is predominantly women, and I interact with very driven, beautiful, funny women daily. There’s always been mutual attraction between myself and other women, but I’ve never felt the desire to ruin my home life over one of them. I find myself drawn to her, and check my phone waiting to see if she has sent me anything. I find myself wanting to pursue this new woman more than wanting to stay in this relationship. However, this other woman is in a different state. I understand crushes happen, but this feels like more.
So here I am. In a new state with someone who I thought I was 100% sure on marrying, who is 100% committed to seeing the relationship succeed and I feel myself pulling away to potentially pursue someone else in another state.
I know how this sounds, and I’ve guilted myself into telling my current partner my hesitancy on marriage, which blindsided her and put me in a position to figure out what I want.
I’m not sure if pursuing this new woman would result in a fruitful relationship, but I can’t stop thinking about the possibilities. On the other hand, I do love my partner. We’ve been through so much together and are generally happy, but I fear my hesitancy may be coming from somewhere else. Is it this new woman? Is it from unhealed wounds from the previous break up?
I’m afraid I never truly recommitted to my partner and got back together because I was more afraid of being alone. Now I have these new intense feelings, which may not be reciprocated, that is causing me to overanalyze everything and rethink my current relationship.
Again, I know how this all sounds. I know people will tell me to break up and pursue the other girl, drop the idea of the other woman and fix what I have, or drop both of them and fix myself. They are all reasonable suggestions and I cannot justify any of them. I love and respect my partner, but I feel selfish not matching her current intentions. I’m not sure if what I’m feeling is cold feet, insecurity, immaturity, or all of the above.
I need 3rd party perspective, which is why I turned here. I’ve been trying to figure this all out on my own without success. Any and all insight is greatly appreciated.

This post is more of a vent - I don't have that many appointments left of my evaluation, but I feel so tired from constantly needing to correct myself.
They ask things like "Do people get confused by you?" or "did you have a problem paying attention in school?" and I'm like... "Perhaps a little bit?".
But as soon as I step outside the room I get flashbacks of how I always looked out the window, listen to music, or doodled in class.. and my classmates often being confused lmao. This has been the case for ALL questions so far.
It's not that I lie - I just literately do not remember the events during my appointment. It's like my memories are left in the void or something. I write down my thoughts asap so I can (hopefully) correct myself on the next appointment, but it's really frustrating that I basically cannot trust myself to give correct answers and it takes so much energy.
Does this sound familiar to anyone? It's rough!
I'm glad that they will have a chat with my partner as well. He's very aware of my behavioway of working. Unlike me he does not have trouble remembering things. If it wasn't for that, I would probably have lost all hope by now 🙃 I just want a correct and proper evaluation.

Hi all,
Just looking for support/insight/feelings of non-alone-ness related to failure to thrive. Sorry, it’ll probably be long.
My daughter is a little under 4 months old. She was born at >90th percentile, and has dropped to about the 4th since then. There have been stretches where she hasn’t really gained anything, and then stretches where her gains are about or just below the daily target. We’ve hit the point though where her doctor is more concerned, and so she’s ordered a battery of tests. I keep trying to tell myself that we don’t really know anything yet, but it’s still very stressful and confusing.
My daughter eats a ton and is pretty high energy. She generally sleeps well at night, but seems too interested in everything to want to sleep much during the day (meaning, she’s definitely not too sleepy from lack of food). She seems to be hitting the milestones in typical fashion.
This is obviously stressful on its own, but it’s also stressed me out considerably when it comes to feeding. I was aiming for EBF, but knew it might not work out. With her initial slow weight gain, her doctor said she suspected I had low production, although my daughter generally seemed content after nursing. Later a lactation specialist said she thought my daughter had trouble extracting milk, and thought some bottles might be helpful, just to know what she was getting.
I did all the things to help increase production, and started to pump more regularly and supplement with formula because I couldn’t pump enough while nursing to keep up with the doctor’s recommendations. Then my daughter seemed to only be willing to nurse first thing in the morning and if she woke up in the middle of the night, so we went from supplementing with bottles to doing bottles except at those times.
My daughter can be kind of erratic with her feeding preferences though. Now sometimes she’ll want to nurse during the day and sometimes she’ll refuse to nurse at the times she usually does. I don’t want to deny her when she wants to nurse, but also worry that the inconsistency is bad for her.
I also think my supply is good now (if that was even the issue), but I admit I’m stressed by not knowing how much she’s taking in when nursing, and every ounce feels so important.
It’s also just stressful not knowing how much she’s taking in when nursing. She’s nursing on average 2-3 times a day and then getting about 20-24 ounces of food in bottles (mostly my milk, usually at least a small amount of formula per day). She seems to like eating and seems to accept food basically anytime. Part of me would love to transition to nursing more when I’m at home, but another part of me is too nervous about intake. Anytime she’s had a lull in growth, I’ve been convinced it’s because I’ve let her nurse too much and that’s impacted her intake.
I don’t know where I’m going with all this, other than needing to vent. It’s scary and frustrating to feel like she’s probably eating enough and has good energy but just isn’t growing.
I also just needed a space to share how frustrating the poor care was that I received from my delivery hospital. They portrayed it as if they would really help set me up with supports, but I feel like I’ve been figuring out feeding and everything else from like, Instagram videos and googling. They messed up my referral for lactation support like 3 times, and their education on pumping and nursing turned out to be really poor. That might not be an uncommon experience, but I’ve felt so alone and unsupported throughout a lot of this process, and I really wish I had known to do some things so differently.
Thanks to anyone who made it through this novel. It just felt good to get it off my chest.