So, I work in the financial aid office at a college. My former director had worked there for nearly 20 years before retiring. When she left. She recommended our assistant director, who had 16 years at this college, for her position. Well, they had recently promoted a new person into a decision making role about the financial aid office, and he is obsessed with outside hiring. So despite this person knowing how to do the job, having a PHD when the job required a bachelors, and having 16 years of experience when the job required 5, they gave it to someone outside the college just because he was outside the college.
So this guy comes in, and is completely incompetent. Has clearly lied about his credentials and abilities as he knows almost nothing about the universal processes or guidelines. He is lazy, often being seen in his office on his phone playing games. When concerns were raised by the two assistant directors they were berated, and implied that they were jealous he got the job instead of one of them. All of us advisors see the strain of this slowly trickling down to us. Eventually both our assistant directors and one of our office managers quite within four weeks of each other.
Now it is just him. No assistant directors and only one office manager. After about a month, they post the office manager job and let us know they will have two openings. They interview everyone who is interested and we have two really great internal candidates…and zero external applicants. They chose to tell the second internal candidate no, because they want an outside hire for the second role. They then told her that the reason she got passed over was for “questioning the decisions of her superiors” by asking about the position after the interviews, when no one heard anything for another month. The second reason they gave was that she should work on finishing her bachelors degree, which is not a requirement for the job.
All through this process I, the only other male presenting person besides the new director, have been getting treated like shit by him. He talks to me like I am a moron, questions every single thing I do, and threatened my job over putting a ticket in with IT.
We went to our union and it did nothing. They had a meeting with him and his boss, and nothing came of it. I had already accepted this and started job hunting.
Now they are introducing a new thing in the office that they call hoteling. Basically they created new positions and there aren’t enough desks in the office for everyone. So now we are going to rotate and share desks with other people at random. Where will we sit during this? At the front desk, which is essentially a bank teller window were part time and student workers sit. We no longer have a personal space at work. We are now forced to sit in a tiny space to be constantly interrupted in it because they refuse to utilize other empty office space.
This is just the tip of the iceberg, I am just running out of space in the post.
I had my second interview at a more prestigious four year institution on Thursday and should find out if I got the job this coming week. Keep your fingers crossed for me peeps, cause I am drowning.

Why does my drinking Bud Light offend you?
May 30, 2023 4:39 pm • Last Updated: May 30, 2023 4:41 pm
By Mike DiMauro
Day Assistant Sports Editor
[[email protected]](mailto:[email protected])
News item: Anthony Bass, a pitcher for the Toronto Blue Jays, shared a video Monday via Instagram endorsing an anti-LGBTQ boycott of brands such as Target and Bud Light.
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"Here's the reason biblically why I believe Christians have gotta be boycotting Target, Bud Light, and any other corporation that's pushing the things they're pushing,” Bass said. “I think a lot of people make this into a political issue, or they say, 'Oh, what's the big deal?’
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“This is evil, this is demonic, we won't stand for it, we're not going to go to the stores anymore and we're not going to give you our money.”
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It would be impolite to wish that Mr. Bass, who throws a ball for a living, blows out his elbow. Perhaps then he could simply blow it out his tailpipe.
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Because I’ve grown tired of sanctimonious and hypocritical moral outrage over what Target and Bud Light are “pushing,” while it’s permissible that Bass and his ilk get to “push” their beliefs on the rest of us.
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Example: In the last two months or so, I’ve been questioned a half dozen times in public as to why I’m drinking Bud Light. Seems people like Bass have objected to Anheuser Busch’s marketing partnership with transgender influencer Dylan Mulvaney. Their boycott of Bud Light has led to a decrease in sales both locally and nationally. (Local bar and restaurant owners say Bud Light sales are down almost 30 percent.)
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It is their right, of course, to boycott the product. I’m just curious as to why what I’m drinking is their business. I drink Bud Light because I like it. And I’m still drinking Bud Light because I will not marginalize people based on gender, race, religion, ethnicity, or sexual orientation. I’m respectful enough to support someone else’s desire to evolve into another gender. And I’m not stupid enough to believe that my decision to drink Bud Light changes who I am or what I stand for in any possible way.
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But I wonder why it’s so important for people — and the questions to me haven’t all come from men — to announce their disdain for a bottle of beer, tacitly implying their sexuality is “normal.” Remember this one and write it down: If you are truly comfortable with who you are, you needn’t announce anything to anyone.
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And yet to further illustrate how screwed up this country really is, there’s this: Anheuser-Busch hasn’t merely been accused of alienating its traditional customer base with the partnership, but some LGBTQ+ campaigners have also criticized the company for not defending its ties with Mulvaney.
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Amid all the finger-pointing and fear-fanning, the truth hides in the corner, too scared to emerge. The truth is that we are supposed to think critically, weigh evidence from both sides and then make up our own minds. Instead, we’ve become a country hell bent on legislating whatever cause we think is right and just, while burying the other side from all consideration.
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It’s political tribalism. All or nothing. One side or the other. If you’re not in agreement with every morsel of the transgender movement, you are a snarling, hating, infidel. If you’re not in total agreement with Anthony Bass and his beliefs, you’re going to wither in hell.
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But what if — and hold on to your ascots here — two conflicting positions can still be true? Example: What if I support Bud Light’s decision to use a transgender influencer, but also believe that transgender high school athletes belong in their own division?
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I disagree with the Connecticut Interscholastic Athletic Conference’s policy complying with a state law that requires all high school students be treated according to their gender identity. We should consider a sports-centric law that acknowledges sports' unique challenges and accommodates the physical component for success that exists virtually nowhere else in society.
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Sex discrimination in education, health care, housing and financial credit have no place in this country. But we must — must — realize and accept that sports require a physical component to succeed that calls for different guidelines.
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Put it this way: Applying to a school or for health care, housing or financial credit requires no physical component to succeed. Sports require speed, strength and agility and do not fit under the same umbrella. And yet sports are routinely shoved into the same arguments about unfair treatment. Injustices get piled on for rhetorical usefulness, even though they're not applicable.
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The male born composition has inherent physical advantages, rare exceptions noted. But in the aggregate, there are physiologic differences between biological males and females. I don’t believe writing that makes me transphobic. We should respect a person’s pronoun of choice. But that doesn't mean we have to blindly agree with claims that are not supported by science.
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Yet that appears to be the new end game in this country. Blind agreement. Their side or yours. And here I sit, sipping my Bud Light, trying to figure out why so many of us act like the last three letters of Anthony Bass’ last name.
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This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro
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Comment threads are monitored for 48 hours after publication and then closed.
READER COMMENTS
Philip BroseJune 1, 2023 at 16:30Report
Robin great points the right can’t even keep track on who to be mad at. Why are they so sensitive? I here Chick-fil-a is evil now for they “ensuring equal access,” “valuing differences,” and “creating a culture of belonging,” under the title, “Committed to being Better at Together.” what monsters!
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Philip BroseJune 1, 2023 at 16:27Report
William Peter the guidance councilor?
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Joseph B De La CruzJune 1, 2023 at 15:15Report
This article pretty much sums up exactly how I feel about the situation. Bud Light basically sent someone a can with her image celebrating a milestone. The fact it turned the beer into enemy number one doesn’t surprise me considering the vitriol that has become commonplace in our country. I have had plenty of private messages regarding a video I posted supporting a beer, and more importantly a human being. Most have been vehemently against my support of both and relish the chance to send me a screen shot of Bud Lights stock on a daily basis with a “Go woke, Go broke” ending. I believe much of the vitriol comes from news and talk radio which is why Spotify now fills my vehicle with music instead of talk. I ask everyone to limit their news intake to 30 minutes per day regardless of your party affiliation to center your life. Sometimes my radio will land on a “news station”, and I can feel my blood pressure rise as the most divisive topic of the day is being discussed with a majority of the facts not being considered. I am not recommending folks to ignore what’s happening in our world, but would point out that our country has survived many decades without the need for “up to the second” news reports. Most of the things we worry about will never happen and it seems our country is living in a constant state of fear which is certainly to blame for the vitriol. There will never be a point where everyone in the country will collectively say we are all happy with everything, but I still have a deep believe that with constructive conversations and true empathy we can get us close. When I get my boat in the water I would love to have an ice cold Bud Light while listening to my relaxing boat playlist, and of course talking with my favorite sports writer. That’s an invitation Mike. Great article.
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Robin DaudaJune 1, 2023 at 13:41Report
“Bud Light sales are down between 26% and 35% nationwide additionally Budweiser and other AB brands (Michelob Ultra, Busch Light and Natural Light to name a few) have also taken a hit of around 11%.”
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All the more reason to explain what set this off. Completely unhinged.
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“My take, buy Coors stock now”
And that statement reinforces my point since Coors has been a decades long supporter of LGBT rights probably the biggest supporter (it all began with a workegay alliance boycott ironically… or not)
“Coors Light has been a sponsor of The Center and Denver PrideFest for decades,” says Rex Fuller, CEO of The Center on Colfax. “The work we have been able to do at The Center over the last four decades would not be possible without this support and we are grateful for it.”
Beyond supporting Denver PrideFest, Molson Coors has a distinguished history of supporting LGBTQ communities across the country, with significant support for organizations such as Human Rights Campaign (HRC), Matthew Shepard Foundation, National Amateur Gay Athletics Association of America, National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce, LGBT Victory Institute, Out & Equal, and One Colorado.
In addition to these partners, Molson Coors works with local LGBTQ organizations in key communities through its Tap Into Change program. Annually, the summer program donates more than $100,000 to these organizations with a consistent growth in impact each year. Events take place in each city to help raise additional funds, awareness, and support for the missions of these local organizations. Over the past 10 years, Tap Into Change has raised nearly $600,000 for local LGBTQ and HIV/AIDS nonprofits.
https://denverpride.org/coors-light-supports-the-lgbtq-community/
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This is even though like 2006, 2010 and 2014 they had to go through boycotts for this. And they did shrink back in response, but also came right back and didn’t move backwards for long.
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And what will I do?
Continue drinking Corona because I drink what I drink.
It’s damn near impossible to do a successful boycott long term. The web of corporate connections means when you think you’re hurting one, it’s actually benefitting another one connected to it.
The beverage brand that owns Budweiser, Corona, and Stella Artois, is suing US beer-maker Constellation Brands for using the Corona brand name in a hard seltzer, according to a lawsuit filed Monday.
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Beverage giant Anheuser-Busch InBev (AB InBev) acquired Corona’s parent company, Grupo Modelo, in 2013, but US antitrust regulators required it to sell the company’s US-based business to Constellation. AB InBev retained rights to the products in other markets, and the deal gave Constellation the rights to produce Corona and other Modelo brands in the US.
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William PeterJune 1, 2023 at 13:36Report
The virtue signalers didn’t like my harmless comment. I guess being offended by an opposing view is reason enough to silence someone in 2023
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Richard GoldenJune 1, 2023 at 12:57Report
Robin- not certain this article nor all the comments will move the needle. Bud Light sales are down between 26% and 35% nationwide additionally Budweiser and other AB brands (Michelob Ultra, Busch Light and Natural Light to name a few) have also taken a hit of around 11%. Bud Light has been the best selling beer in the USA for over 20 years and the normal volume of sales is 27 million barrels a year or 1134 million gallons. A 30% drop equals a loss of 340 million gallons a year. My take, buy Coors stock now
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Chris JawakaJune 1, 2023 at 10:12Report
People are allowed to drink or not drink whatever beer they want and for whatever reason they choose. End of story.
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Robin DaudaJune 1, 2023 at 09:05Report
Do people realize that Bud Light sent a pack of specially made cans with the person’s face on it and did a minute long or so bit released on like TicTok? It wasn’t some big nationwide PR campaign yet it rubbed someone the wrong way (or so they would like us to think) and it snowballed into this.
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I don’t ever want to hear about people calling “the libs” snowflakes or use their center liberal stances as a weakness. These champions of “conservatives” are gullible whiny babies.
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I watched in real time a bunch of idiots blow something up out of nothing and then saw them flocking to the internet people with their influencer pages and podcasts and publications where immediately they were being hawked “anti-woke” beer and all these other wares, often made by the same places they are boycotting for double the price.
There is a whole market opening up to people that will only get their businesses off the ground (temporarily for a quick cash grab) by using these outrage tactics and capitalizing (literally) on impaired brains that as Mr. DiMauro correctly observed “Blind agreement. Their side or yours”
Bless your little void of empathy and common sense hearts. Don’t spend all your money in one place now, spread the wealth to these people selling you overpriced junk.
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Paul LevasseurJune 1, 2023 at 07:47Report
Mike is discussing one of this election cycles right wing culture war hot spots.
If you can’t get elected because of your governing skills you’re going to have to try to get elected by getting people angry and hateful. The right wing loves doing that. It’s their bread and butter.
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TOM DONNEEJune 1, 2023 at 06:46Report
Preaching hate and preaching tolerance ARE NOT the same Evan
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DANIEL STORMSJune 1, 2023 at 05:56Report
I always liked this formulation: “In the first place, what makes it any of you business? And in the second place, my reasons for saying yea to [whatever it is that offends you] are at least as valid (and maybe more so) than yours for nay. And in the third place, what makes it any of your sodding business in the first place?” I agree wholeheartedly with your plea for reason and tolerance. Not to seem argumentative but rather to add information to the discussion, though, you might be interested in this blog post from a biologist about the supposed physiologic advantages a trans man or woman has over a cis athelete: https://freethoughtblogs.com/pharyngula/2023/05/31/we-hunted-the-rabbit/
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Evan AndriopolousJune 1, 2023 at 03:10Report
For me… Bud Light as a “beer” sucks. I would rather support local breweries that provide far better beers. As far as this column… as far as AB selecting this influencer in their campaign I have no opinion on it or that person. Up to each to decide for themselves.
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Regarding this column actually Mike what you are writing is basically the same as the boycott and the changes in attitudes (political divide) of the country. Often used by politicians on BOTH sides of the aisle screaming to be open, defending one´s right to choose, freedom of speech etc.. and this is the most important part..”unless it does not validate their opinion or view”. This is exactly what you are writing. So if someone elects to boycott something and we know the WOKE police and Leftists enjoy not only condemning opposing viewpoints to the point of boycotting, attacking employers for the “views” of their employees etc… and demanding they be removed from the position their are in. So if someone boycotts something let them… I would ask you… why does it offend you that others are using their constitutional right by boycotting (freedom of speech). I always respect other´s opinions and even when we do not agree. Sadly we live in a world where people are afraid to speak up due to the potential ramifications. None of us will always agree and I know the powers to be are trying to “force” us to all be uniform in our opinions which is sad. And btw Bud Light is terrible anyway… How about you focus on sports.
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Benoit BenoitMay 31, 2023 at 20:12Report
Ironic you drink because you like it but will continue to drink it because “ I will not marginalize people based on gender, race, religion, ethnicity, or sexual orientation.” Not just because you like it.
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William PeterMay 31, 2023 at 17:46Report
This comment has been removed for violating The Day’s commenting policy.
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JAY DEMPSEYMay 31, 2023 at 16:53Report
TY Mike….. I drink Bud Light most all the time unless in Ireland…and support Levine Distributors in our area and my friends that work there. I think the cancel culture is terrible whatever your political party of choice is. Very sad that social media has done this to us. I have good friends that I can no longer talk politics with because of the “great divide” that enriches social media giants.
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ROBERT WARNERMay 31, 2023 at 16:45Report
I suppose a similar question could be asked, “Why does a person wearing a MAGA hat bother some people?”
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David NowakowskiMay 31, 2023 at 14:30Report
great column, Mike. I’d like to think there are far more folks who see this subject and all its nuances the way you do…but you are probably right again in saying that it is tough to go against your chosen tribe on any component, regardless of how you might actually feel. thanks again!
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Andrew RogersonMay 31, 2023 at 13:33Report
Mike DiMauro – well said sir, on all counts.
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Lynn YoungMay 31, 2023 at 13:28Report
Drink what you like. Be who you are. Live and let live.
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Richard GoldenMay 31, 2023 at 12:36Report
Light Beer is like Sex on the Beach….****ing near water.
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Paul NUNESMay 31, 2023 at 11:44Report
Does anyone remember the first light beer and the commercial featuring a slice of bread?
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THOMAS MORIARTYMay 31, 2023 at 11:05Report
Richard, must have been some other brand light. Bud Light? It was probably 10 years ago. But he could have been messing with me.
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Richard GoldenMay 31, 2023 at 10:17Report
Malcolm- The moral of the story is; if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
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Richard GoldenMay 31, 2023 at 10:16Report
Thomas- as far as I knew and as far as I can tell Guinness is the most popular beer in Ireland holding a full 25% of the market share. Bud Light does not even show up in the top ten (https://www.beer100.com/best-selling-beers-ireland/) I think the guy was pulling your leg. Bud Light only became available in Ireland in 2020.
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Malcolm JulesMay 31, 2023 at 09:32Report
A corporation decided to target one of their products to a specific community and failed….end of story.
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Margaret KliseMay 31, 2023 at 09:12Report
Agree/agree. Good article, Mike.
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SUSAN HOTCHKISSMay 31, 2023 at 09:06Report
I always enjoy Mike’s opinion pieces. In total agreement about the transgender athlete issue.
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THOMAS MORIARTYMay 31, 2023 at 09:00Report
Tom, hope all is well with your daughter.
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THOMAS MORIARTYMay 31, 2023 at 08:57Report
A Bud Light story: Several years ago while in Ireland my son and I toured the Guinness brewery. Of course there’s a pub on the top floor and while getting a pint of Guinness the bar I notice several taps Bud Light. I asked the bartender “why in God’s name are you serving THAT stuff in here?” He replied that it’s the best selling beer in Ireland. Go figue!
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THOMAS MORIARTYMay 31, 2023 at 08:51Report
Good column Mike. These anti “woke” zealots claim to support democracy but would be no different from the Taliban if they had their way.
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Richard GoldenMay 31, 2023 at 08:42Report
All this talk of beer makes me thirsty…but I have found that drinking beer has become an unwelcome undertaking. No beer allowed at the beach, nor while night fishing in Waterford, nor surf fishing at Avery Point, nor at any state boat launch, nor is state parks- try walking down the street with a cold one….
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Chris JawakaMay 31, 2023 at 08:08Report
IMO The left loves their cancel culture but gets all grumpy when the right does the same. Hey it can go both ways. That said I really don’t care about the Bud thing. Its not like they sold beer with its face on it.
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Matther TookerMay 31, 2023 at 07:35Report
Thoughtful piece as always Mike. Perhaps the best offset for the 30% decrease in Bud Light sales would be a 30% increase in church attendance. I am betting that won’t happen. (Matt Tooker)
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KEITH J. ROBBINSMay 31, 2023 at 06:11Report
You drinking Bud-Lite does not offend me, although it is a horrible beer. What is my concern is a guy using the ladies room that my nieces use!
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TOM DONNEEMay 31, 2023 at 05:55Report
Agree Phil. Well done Mike!! Waiting for my daughter to come out of surgery. Then we’ll stop for a cold one, think I’ll make it a Bud Lite!!!
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Philip BroseMay 30, 2023 at 16:59Report
Mr. DiMauro is always thoughtful and intelligent. The best writer at the day. Give the guy a raise.

I'm still on the older patch just because I've been trying to optimize a good england run for awhile and i had a save start where burgandy, aragon and castile all started friendly. From start date to 1452 it was all about consolidating territory. I didn't do any of the typical tricks like selling maine.
Screen caps and save download
https://imgur.com/a/K7Rjv3B
Save file for 1.34.5 only mod i'm running is betterfontmod though this file is only good til Jun 17, 2023 2:59 AM
https://file.io/BSig0eMYNlHT
Pre-War of the Roses
I sat on my lands until march 1448 when the war of the roses triggered. Think my 60% manpower hit like a few months prior for the mission. I hired the white company because they had a 3 siege general and i needed 9 units to reach force limit which put me 1 over FL but figured the 3 siege general was worth. In those first 4 years I didn't do much save for upgrading cot's in calais and cotentin at the start by taking all 6 monopolies. Reason for monopolies is 3 fold. 1) You want low influence on your estates to gain crown land faster so I only took the +1 mana and monopolies and 2) the extra money to upgrade cot's is nice and 3) the mercantilism as england is actually super good because of your end node for trade(6 merc is 12% trade power modifier which is like 25% of a marketplace on every province). I dev'd Lincolnshire at some point when i got an event for -10% dev cost using some mil to get it to 10 dev so i can upgrade it's cot. I believe i also upgraded york right after the war of the roses triggered so i had my age objective filled super early for 5 cot's. Minor tip but mothball your fleet save for your barques prior to war of the roses and lower army maintenance. I ended up taking 3 normal loans to grab a navel doctrine(enemy ship capture) and to upgrade york. Not sure how optimal the doctrine was though as i end up WAY over ship force limit(like 60/40) which was costing me like 3-4 ducats a month until i could finish the 100 year war and sell ships.
War of the Roses
I save scummed a bit to get a good ruler(5/6/6). That likely didn't matter all that much but it speeds up ideas a few months. There's a trick to the war of the roses as well that works in 1.34 which I assume works in 1.35 as well but I haven't tested. If you put a unit in every province in england/ireland except mann you can force spawn the rebel stack in mann. Also works with parking 1 ship in a port. The benefit of this is the rebel spawn is only 9 units which is very handy because the stack spawns with i believe higher morale(might be tactics) which makes them a pain to effectively kill when they are say a 16 stack. Also killing the stack on an island instant wipes it though you do take a dice penalty when fighting it.
100 years war
I curried favor with castille, aragon and burgundy for most of the first 4 years until i got to 9ish favors. Burgundy was first so I swapped him to Portugal doing the same. After I got to 9 favors I started to improve relations on nations I know would get the biggest AE hit(liege and Aachen typically get huge values doing this strat) as well as put my third diplomat to improve relations with burgundy. Once you get the union with france burgundy has a habit of instantly desiring your provinces so much that you need around +200-ish relations with them in order for them to stay ally and not flip hostile. Idea overall though was to get people to like 70-80 relations then work on someone else.
In my case, I may have save scummed a bit to make sure the surrender of maine didn't fire prior to the war of roses i honestly don't remember. It's not that uncommon however for it to not fire until 1448 either and it doesn't *really* matter that much so long as it fires after you have 10 favors with the lads.
As for fighting the war, it's pretty simple when you can call in burgundy, aragon, castille and portugal. Some minor advice though is that I'd recommend sieging down chartes and paris yourself to start and then Haut-Poitou and in my case france ate all of Brittany so i also sieged down Brest. In my experience, if you leave the ai to their own devices on the continent they can get kinda dumb not knowing to reinforce battles rater than sitting on a siege so it's kinda better if you siege and let them focus on killing france + ally stacks. France typically wont target you if you keep your stacks big enough around the sieges. I also got a bit lucky that Henry Tudor was a 4 siege general though that's not really needed. I made him a general hoping for him to die to get a heir with more than 12 points(still hasn't happened in 1464).
Irish/Scotland wars
This part is kind of important. I like to fight scotland during the france war because if you wait until after they are no longer a valid rival. So once i did those 4 sieges in france to help the ai out a bit i moved my men to england to fight scotland. They had allied tyrone so I first started a war with LeinsteThomond co-bellgerenting both but not Tyrone so they wouldn't be a part of the Scot war. In terms of the Scot war the goal should be to take all of lowlands directly via conquest(set Lothian as war goal as it's the highest value province) and then to humiliate + money. Reason this is so important is otherwise filling the humiliate goal is a pain and ideally you want to get ages objectives asap. Also make sure you take the war of the roses mission for AE reduction prior to peace out.
Mopping up the rest of Ireland is pretty straight forward. But concentrating dev on the lowlands, ulster and connacht should put london at 30ish dev iirc to fulfill your 3rd age objective.
Peacing out france + post war
In terms of peacing out france... you're gonna get coalitioned. There's just too many hre minors but if you managed relations well enough no one will actually declare on you. However, make sure you take the religious diplomats prior to enforcing the union. You want to wait until after the irish minors and scotland are dead because you don't want to give more influence to get less crownlands. I took the union, had them revoke cores on my provinces and took money for a full 100% in January of 1452 which left me a coalition of a lot of random western german minors, denmark and i think austria was in it but i quickly got them to +50 opinion. Also in my game Castille had rivaled Aragon so directly after peacing out i used up my remaining favors with aragon for money or soldiers i forget then rivaled them instantly breaking the alliance. Reason for this is i was over relations and i want dip for exploration and also because castille has a bad habit of rivaling you once you take france and in my case they didn't seem to do this when we shared a rival.
This is kind of another important bit. I think the best way to play england -> GB is colonial and this is likely still true in 1.35 if you choose the GB route instead of the Angevin route. IMO england is the best colonizer because they have the best economy to support over limit. Also once you finish exploration ideas, there is a parliament issue(charter colonies) which gives +1 colonist and +20 global settler. The biggest drawback is colonial range but there's a trick to this. Once you get the 3rd idea in exploration you have enough range to reach both gibraltar and tenerife. So, if you keep focus on dip to start the game, get only level 4 ideas in dip and bank dip until you can get level 5 admin asap, you very quickly will be able to get the 3rd idea before castille given they have a trash ruleheir and you can upgrade via war of the roses. And once you colonize tenerife, you have enough range to reach the west indies.
Additionally, since castille likely depleted their manpower vs france they may not have their mission to go in against granada yet which is typically my next play in order to finish the gibraltar mission and to get alhambra. Probably wanna give the other 2 provinces to castille so they don't hate you however. I would also recommend co-biligerenting Morocco to take Demnate. The 10% trade efficiency from it at max is huge. Like i'm sitting at 31.97 ducats from trade in 1464 and that's only going to get bigger.
In my case, Castille had their starting ruler die during the 100 years war with enrique taking the throne which i was thrilled about because 0/0/0 meant they'd be slower to colonize though you still will beat them to tenerife if he doesn't take the throne. I figured they would just be slower to columbia which meant i had more time to both grab africa and pieces of the new world. However, i got kinda lucky in that enrique died without an heir in April of 1453. I considered save scumming it because my typical play is to let spain form and then force pu them but I figured this was probably better in the long run given they wouldn't colonize now(went religious instead).
Burgundy was the most lucky i've ever been with them in a run. Previous best for inheriting them was like 1481. In this game, Charles didn't take the throne until like 1455 or later but he died in August of 1463 and I got the horse event in April of 1464.
General thoughts on playing england efficiently
As I said before, to me colonizer england makes the most sense unless you are in 1.35 and go Angevin. My preferred path is exploration, expansion, religious and then diplo. In previous runs using this I've been able to get economic hegemony in like the 1550-1600ish range but I suspect i may be able to do better this run. The basic idea here is you want to grab a colonial nation in the west indies then grab all of west africa and by doing that you can force most of the trade in the new world and old world to flow to the english channel. And with explo/expansion you get 4 colonist with the parliament and given england's economy especially if you inherit burgundy you're able to run like 8-9 colonies by 1500 while rushing toward micronesia for the great project. Once you get to like 1505 is roughly when you'll get admin 10 for religious and that then allows you to deus vault the old world as you please. Diplo is there purely for the war score cost which fits in great with the age bonus and england also gets claims on malta. That part can be a bit tricky because of the rng of iberian wedding but if you can manage the 5 year truce after rivaling Aragon then go in against them for the islands you get claims on you can take that prior to castille getting them.
Also, i've found doing these runs with england has helped me understand optimizing my economy better. That's part of the reason i haven't gone to 1.35 is because i keep restarting this run after i realize i could do something economy wise way better. Stuff like best way to handle trade companies took several tries. Also understanding where and when to build buildings. Even stuff like which monuments are worth investing into which is to say... most aren't until you're stupid rich. Versailles is pretty good given you get 10% tax for level 1 though the further levels are less worth until you are stupid rich. Alhambra is probably worth maxing for 5% AE. Only other one I'd consider upgrading is probably the one i mentioned in morocco just because 10% TE scales very well with how you will be playing.
Another reason I think this path is best for england is simply because you're gonna hit your gov capacity quick. In my current save i'm at 729/750 running all 3 +100's from the estates in 1464. I'll get 200 more shortly when i hit empire rank but with the +1/1/1 age objective you tend to grow faster than you get gov capacity and courthouses don't show up until the 1490-1500 range. Admittedly, the Burgundians are a large part of that but half of that was just the british isles and that's before you integrate france. I tend to just sit with them as a PU even when i can integrate because i don't have the GC.
Edit: One minor trick with england is wait until December 1444 before you pick an issue from parliament because assuming you take the +1 mana you will almost always be able to take an issue which gives you 5% crownland back starting at 10% rather than 5%
Edit 2: Another thing I forgot to mention that i did save scum for is if england doesn't have a consort there's a chance for this event to pop which gives you either a 3/4/3 ruler(Margaret of d'Anjou), a 3/4/3 consort +100 mana from each or the third option which is +100 mana from each and a 50% cheaper level 2 statesman. You want to marry the 4 allies you have because relations improves favor generation but ideally you don't want them to give you a consort hence save scumming given you can't do much to change whether you get one when you marry. If you get this event you want to choose the +100 mana and the 50% cheaper statesmen because you don't keep the 3/4/3 ruler as the war of roses still progresses. It's not super likely to happen prior to march 1448 which is typically when the war of roses will start unless you either get stability(increases how long it takes) or if you get a legitimacy hit which speeds up war of the roses if you're under 90. The mean time to happen is 200 months(almost 17 years) but it's a really nice boon to get if it does happen(it did in this save).

Im so confused. "background"
We met 2 years ago. Everything was amazing. I have a daughter from a previous relationship and always worried about being able to find the perfect man.
I ended up dating an amazing man (at the time).
As time went on he would act strange and when he met my friends he said they were not good for me. (i know red flags, but my friends are crazy but they are good to me and i am just the quiet one in the group).
We were "doing" stuff in bed one night and he bite my lip and wouldn't let it go. He said that I was a whore and loved attention.
I left him after this. Then after work I got home, outside my front door was flowers, a massive new mirror, a card, and new furniture. I rang him to say thank you. He apologised and said he has issues with gambling.
I told him i would help i was happy he told me.
Time went on we went on holidays he spolied us rotten with gifts, disney, italy, trips everywhere. And then every few months he would blip, call me horrible names, say horrible things about my body (to the point where i can not even look at myself in the mirror anymore).
"Anyways"
Every few month blips, turned into every fortnight, every weekend and recently every other day.
I left him ages ago. But I still see him sometimes as my daughter loves him, his family our like my family. It really was a dream relationship, i sometimes regretted ending it, but i didn't like what it was doing to my energy levels and mental health. Everything had to be about him. If i went out with a friend he would get drunk in my house and ask me if i was woth another man. (literally in work uniform after work beers and food with 2 female friends) i stopped going out. He had fake social media accounts under different names to talk to women, was on sex meetup sites. He was going to gambling meetings and getting close woth females there. I had enough and left.
FAST FORWARD.
Past few weeks i have been feeling absolutely amazing. I have felt free, doing fun things, enjoying life, beach trips, out with friends. I was ignoring his texts.
** I was OVER him completely**
He rang me saying he needed help badly. He's in debt and needs me to help him get well. He was crying. I said okay, you can stay with me for 4 weeks, until pay day.
The first 3 days were fun and as the weekend approached he asked if we could try to be a family again. I said no. I don't love you, i am here to help you, that's it.
He kept asking, and asking and asking. He admitted that hundreds of women have been propositioned him (from work and his home town) and he has wasted his time on me. I told him i was happy for him and he should move on. He agreed.
We planned to go swimming this weekend. He came to pick me up. (i noticed 100€ was missing).
He said he dropped it.
I counted money and he asked me again about being a family. I said no stop asking. He said no point in living ill just go gamble.
We got into a huge argument. He was trying to get bank card to gamble and i ended up flushing it down the toilet. (im not an anrgy person but i have been lisntening to gambling stuff non stop for 2 years and reacted). I told him he needed help, i couldn't do it alone.
I had money in my hand sitting down. He stood staring at me. He walked over and put his arms out wide and i thought he was giving me a hug(hes 6.6ft 18 stone, big big guy). He slapped both sides of my face and squeezed really hard saying"your mine i want you, I want you, i need you" over and over again. (left a small bruise)
I locked myself outside. He left. My daughter was in neighbours house at pool party. I rang my mum. My mum rang the police. And the police are now wanting to put my child on a protection list with social services. (ie. Her dad will get custody (whole other dilemma she hates going to his house, he won't let her be a kid ie.messy time, he doesn't play with her).
I know he won't come near me again, just want to be at peace and enjoy like last week.
I can't sleep now, my mental health is very very low because I am afraid I am going to loose my daughter. I lay awake all night looking at her.
My whole life is all about her. I am an amazing mother, my daughter is confident, intelligent, emotionally intune, empathic and so loving.
She's top in her class for reading and maths. I take her swimming everyweek, to the beach, holidays, horse riding, fishing. Everything i have goes to my daughter.
And now because my mum reported my ex for domestic violence, I am going to loose my daughter.
I just feel like giving up.

At Royal Rumble 2023, Asuka returned after a brief hiatus, sporting a deranged look reminiscent of her days as Kana. And since that point, the Empress of Tomorrow has solidified her powerful aura, winning the Elimination Chamber match and avenging her disappointing loss to Bianca at WrestleMania 39 by dethroning the EST at Night Of Champions. And while Asuka has been Raw Women’s Champion before, this time feels…different…
Monday Night Raw (5/29/23):
Following Night of Champions with the crowning of Asuka, it would appear the landscape of the women’s division has changed. While some individuals are surely eager to go after singles gold, this isn’t initially the case for the Way. In a backstage interview with Byron Saxton, Candice LeRae and Indi Hartwell express their desire to go after the Women’s Tag Team Titles, only to be interrupted by the lunatic duo of Chelsea Green and Sonya Deville. Deville tries to get under the skin of the pairing, particularly LeRae, mocking her struggles to get victories as of late. However, Candice retorts that Sonya and Chelsea haven’t done anything either, their only actual success as a duo being making Adam Pearce question his own sanity. After a few more moments of bickering, Green tries to slap LeRae, but Hartwell blocks it for her, shoving Chelsea to the ground. Sonya shoves Indi back, and Candice in-turn attacks Deville, forcing several officials to have to separate things.
This results in a singles match later in the evening between Deville and LeRae, with Sonya trying to make an example out of the “Poison Pixie”. It’s a fairly back-and-forth encounter, with LeRae starting the match off hot, but Sonya is able to adapt, using her MMA background to her advantage with increasingly strong shots. However, as Sonya gains control, her emotions also start to fluctuate a bit. Rather than just go for the win at points, she decides to inflict further damage, regularly targeting the right arm in particular with a combination of stomps and armbars. However, the turning point of the match comes when Deville kneels down, once again looking to apply some type of submission hold…only for LeRae to transition it into the Garga-No Escape! While Sonya doesn’t submit, it gives her enough breathing room to mount a comeback, eventually hitting her signature springboard moonsault to finish things.
Candice LeRae def. Sonya Deville via pinfall
After the match, Candice and Indi take a moment to celebrate the win…BUT HERE COMES ASUKA! The Raw Women’s Champion is in the building, and she looks as maniacal as ever. She makes her way towards LeRae…and offers a handshake? Candice is definitely hesitant to accept, and for good reason, as when she starts moving her hand out…ASUKA HITS HER WITH A ROUNDHOUSE KICK! Indi tries to avenge her downed partner, but Asuka takes her out with a spinning backfist. The Empress moves back towards LeRae, staring at the injured right arm…AND SHE APPLIES A VICIOUS ARMBAR, SNAPPING IT IN THE PROCESS! Asuka eventually lets go, with Johnny Gargano and a medical official coming out to tend to LeRae while Adam Pearce wants to know what’s wrong with Asuka…to which she merely replies with a sinister smile…
Monday Night Raw (6/5/23):
About half-way through the show, Johnny Gargano comes to the ring, ready to give an update on his wife Candice LeRae. He says that while LeRae is unable to compete, it’s only for a short period of time, and the fracture to her arm was small enough as to where she won’t require surgery. However, Gargano also says that LeRae wanted him to pass along a message…which is why he’s calling out Asuka to the ring! On cue, the Empress comes out, looking at Johnny Wrestling with a curious look. Gargano says that once upon a time, he and his wife both had respect for Asuka’s accomplishments, especially her record-setting run in NXT. However, with the actions of last week, they no longer have those sentiments, and when LeRae returns from this set-back, she’s challenging you for that Raw Women’s Title! As Gargano says this, Asuka just begins giving a deranged laugh. No one in the arena knows what to make of this…until Asuka picks up a mic…to simply say…bye bye…
As Asuka makes her way to the ring apron, Gargano is left staring in confusion at what transpired…but suddenly, the lights go out! When they turn back on…a trio of masked men are destroying Johnny Wrestling! He tries to fight back, but he’s just overpowered, and left to be stomped on as Asuka just watches on from ringside, enjoying the carnage. The biggest of the three hits Gargano with a top rope splash, before what appears to be the leader hits…a wheelbarrow neckbreaker. As the individual hits this, Asuka comes back into the ring, standing alongside the figures. She whispers something to them, and they move their hand to the top of the masks, pulling them off to reveal…IT’S SAnitY! Eric Young, Alexander Wolfe, and Killian Dain are all back in WWE, and it appears they’ve aligned themselves with the Empress of Tomorrow. But the question left to be answered… Where is Nikki Cross in all of this?
Monday Night Raw (6/12/23):
In a backstage segment early in the show, the camera shows Nikki Cross backstage, alone and looking down, drowning in her own crazed thoughts…until Eric Young enters the shot. Cross raises her head, looking expressionless while a smile slowly creeps across the face of Young. He asks her…
“Won’t you join us?”
However, before Nikki can answer…HERE COMES JOHNNY GARGANO! He dives at Eric, looking to get revenge on one of the men who decimated him the week prior. He’s successful initially, but soon enough, Wolfe and Dain rush in, prying Johnny off Young and starting to beat him down. Luckily for Gargano, he came prepared, as he too has backup in the form of Dexter Lumis! SAnitY backs off as Dexter comes in with a steel chair, but not before Young mouths the words…This isn’t over…
Monday Night Raw (6/19/23): Johnny Gargano and Dexter Lumis vs. Eric Young and Killian Dain
With the tensions continuing to rise between the Way and SAnitY, it was inevitable they’d have to square off at some point, and Adam Pearce decides to see if a tag match can resolve this. The match starts off with Gargano and Young, Johnny Wrestling anxious to annihilate him while Young is more amused than scared. Johnny is able to get the upper hand initially, a superkick giving him the brief opportunity to then apply a Garga-No Escape. However, Killian Dain breaks up the hold by just hitting a Senton on Gargano’s back, a tactical maneuver to give Young the chance to gain control. However, Lumis enters the ring as well, grabbing Dain and trying to set him up for a side slam. However, Killian avoids it, and the pair move to the outside of the ring to brawl. By the end of the match, Gargano is weakened, but he’s still got the power of adrenaline on his side. He’s able to tag in for Lumis, getting in a flurry of offense against the big man Dain, including a pair of superkicks to knock him off his feet. However, as he goes for the One Final Beat, Young grabs his foot by the ring apron, preventing him from springboarding into the ring. Gargano’s able to kick him away, but when Johnny does go for the maneuver, Dain catches him, planting him in the center of the ring. He follows up on it with a splash from the top rope, with Young tagging in as he does so. And with Killian shoving Lumis off the apron, Young is able to hit the Wheelbarrow Neckbreaker to finish the match.
SAnitY def. Johnny Gargano and Dexter Lumis
After the match, Asuka makes her way to the ring, standing alongside SAnitY once again. She looks at the downed Gargano, now with a disgusted look on her face rather than an evil grin. She turns to Young, who nods and motions for Dain and Wolfe to pick Johnny up. But right before Asuka can seemingly hit him with the Mist…Here comes Nikki Cross! She rushes to the ring, sliding in and looking right at Asuka as she does so. Young walks up to her, asking her the question…
“Are you with us, Nikki?”
Cross stares at Young for a moment…then to Wolfe…then to Dain…then to Asuka. It’s to the Raw Women’s Champion that she gives the longest stare, Nikki’s eyes slowly growing wider and her expression becoming more intense. And with that, she mutters just a few words…
“You hurt my friends…she hurt my best friend… now she will pay.”
And with that, Cross dives onto Asuka, unleashing a flurry of strikes and catching everyone in the ring by surprise. However, Young pries Nikki off of the Empress, to which Cross responds by starting to attack him! However, it’s short lived, as Asuka runs up behind Nikki and drops her with a roundhouse kick. She quickly gets her locked in a crossface chickenwing as well, Nikki unable to escape and ultimately passing out. Before she fades, she’s left to only see the disappointed looks on the face of the SAnitY members…”You made the wrong choice Nikki”. But the attention soon shifts back to Gargano and Lumis now. They’ve slowly risen to their feet, and Gargano, looking directly at Young, demands another fight! Young sighs, seemingly bored at the prospect of SAnitY having to dismantle those two again…but it shall be done. However, before they can move in for the kill, we suddenly hear crashes echo throughout the arena. They happen for a few seconds, before the lights dim slightly. An unfamiliar melodic theme starts playing, sounding slightly reminiscent of that of a final boss, but as the lights turn back on, it changes back into the more recognizable song…
…NO ONE WILL SURVIVE! IT’S TOMMASO CIAMPA! After being on the shelf for months, he’s finally back, and as he gets into the ring, he looks at Johnny Gargano…there’s no shortage of history here. And while there’s a momentary tension as to what he’s gonna do, he sides with his former DIY partner, making it a more fair fight! Unfortunately, he doesn’t get the chance to lay into any of SAnitY, as they decide to make their exit, already having made a statement with the victory and assault on Asuka, nothing more needed to be done…tonight, at least.
Monday Night Raw (6/26/23): Indi Hartwell vs. Asuka - Non-Title Match
In her first match since beating Bianca at Night of Champions, Asuka looks to prove why she’s the champion. She starts off the match well, not letting Indi get any momentum by just rocking her with a series of kicks to the chest. After dragging Hartwell to the outside, Asuka begins going after the arm, slamming it several times into the ring post before deciding to inflict some pain to the skull with a tiger suplex. This momentarily causes the ref to check on her, potentially looking to end the match…but Asuka isn’t willing to let that happen. She gets Indi back in the ring, lining her up for a running hip attack…BUT HARTWELL TRANSITIONS IT INTO A GERMAN SUPLEX! Despite having just been on the ropes, Indi managed to use what she had left in the tank to take down Asuka, and as she gets to her feet, she feels the crowd surging behind her. She starts taking it to the Empress, getting her backed into the corner and landing a few solid chops. However, she gets a bit overzealous, trying to get Asuka on the top rope for a potential suplex attempt, only for the former Kana to kick her away and land a knee directly to the back of Indi’s neck. And with that, Asuka remains in the power position, eventually locking on the same Armbar that injured Candice LeRae and forcing Hartwell to tap or get snapped.
Asuka def. Indi Hartwell via submission
But before Asuka really has a chance to even get up…HERE COMES NIKKI CROSS! She runs out with a kendo stick, furious as to what transpired the week prior, and gets in a few shots on Asuka before Alexander Wolfe attempts to pry the weapon away. In response, Nikki shoves it into his gut, before hitting him with a swinging neckbreaker and sending a message to Asuka that she’s just as much of a force to be reckoned with. And it’s later announced that this match has been declared official for Money In the Bank: let’s see if these two dangerous competitors can live up to their classic from NXT…
Money In The Bank (7/1/23): Nikki Cross vs. Asuka (c) - Raw Women’s Championship
Despite not having a stipulation like their Last Woman Standing Match in 2017, the match is still intense from start-to-finish. Cross runs at Asuka immediately, getting in some shots with the elbow to the side of the face. Asuka is forced to a sitting position, allowing Nikki to gather some steam from running along the ropes before landing a kick to Asuka’s jaw! Unfortunately for Cross, her frenzied nature ends up backfiring, as when the action shifts to the outside, Asuka dodges a running attack and sends Nikki nearly head first into the barricade! With Nikki instinctively grabbing her head after the missed maneuver, Asuka sees what to target, dragging Cross to the ring apron and repeatedly crushing her skull into the ring post. And as the action shifts back into the ring, it’s just more of the same, Asuka being momentarily hit by mini-bursts of offense, but the damage inflicted on the skull clearly affecting her. This is evidenced when Cross has Asuka lined up for the swinging neckbreaker, potentially able to get her the win…only to collapse before she can properly hit it. With that, Asuka is able to apply the Asuka Lock, and as happened a couple of weeks ago, Cross passes out in the hold.
Asuka def. Nikki Cross via submission pass-out to retain the Raw Women’s Championship
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On the Raw after Money in the Bank, Candice LeRae would make her return from injury, calling out Asuka for a match…only to learn she isn’t in the building. But she decides to still issue a challenge, saying that while she wanted the Raw Women’s Title initially…now it’s about more than that. Asuka took out Candice’s friends and family, and left her away from the ring for too long…now, she wants to beat Asuka for vengeance first, gold later. And later on, it’s confirmed that the match will be taking place when Asuka returns…except it’ll be for the title as well! Pearce claims that the decision is due to Asuka’s recent actions, as after all, letting someone try to break someone’s limb after a match with no repercussions is a pretty bad look. But while this choice of action would normally upset some superstars…it might just put a smile on Asuka’s face…
Monday Night Raw (7/10/23): Candice LeRae vs. Asuka
Before making her entrance, Candice LeRae gets herself prepared with the rest of the Way, with Nikki Cross sitting in a corner nearby as well. Indi tells her to be cautious…Asuka’s a very dangerous competitor. LeRae of course knows this, but she’s caught off-guard by some words of wisdom from Nikki several feet away:
“Destroy her.”
Candice looks at Nikki, who’s staring back at her with something in her eyes…A look of needing something… wanting Candice to kill the Empress. LeRae nods, and she heads out to the ring, more confident than ever…And she truly gives it her all. LeRae’s strategy is simple: prevent Asuka from using her signature kicks. And for most of the match, she executes on her plan, moving herself back whenever she senses a roundhouse coming and catching Asuka off-balance. However, this was never going to last, and once Asuka lands a kick to the gut, she’s able to gather steam. And while this doesn’t finish LeRae, the “Poison Pixie” even managing to hit a springboard moonsault AND lock in a Garga-No Escape at various points, Asuka eventually locks in an Armbar on the previously-injured limb that Candice can’t overcome.
Asuka def. Candice LeRae via submission to retain the Raw Women’s Championship
After the match, the rest of the Way comes out, helping Candice to her feet. As they do so, Asuka stares at them, and then begins…counting them? The Way and the commentary team are confused, but as Asuka only counts four people…a maniacal expression overtakes her. She starts walking quickly to the back, and a few moments later, it becomes clear what her intentions were…
As the Way walks backstage, they’re horrified to discover a brutalized Nikki Cross! They rush over to her, asking who did this…and to no one’s surprise, she says it was Asuka. However, it soon becomes clear to Gargano…Ciampa might be next! While Indi and Candice stay with Nikki, Johnny (and Dexter to a lesser extent) start rushing through the halls, trying to get to the right locker room…but it’s too late, as SAnitY and Asuka are seen moving away from it! While Lumis stands guard, Gargano rushes inside, and finds Ciampa not just taken out…but also sprayed by Asuka’s mist! Johnny rushes over, giving Tommaso a towel, but as Tommaso wipes the mist off his face…there appears to be a dark look in his eyes, something not seen in him since when he destroyed DIY…
Remaining Build To SummerSlam:
While Ciampa, Gargano, and Lumis keep their attention towards SAnitY for a bit, Asuka shifts away from LeRae, Hartwell, and Cross, having beaten all three after all. With an open mic, she begins giving one of her standard energetic promos, seemingly wanting to know who her next challenger is gonna be…even though no one is ready for Asuka. It’s not long before someone interrupts though…and it’s someone who Asuka has grown familiar with in 2023…It’s Bianca Belair! The EST remained off television for several weeks following Night of Champions, but now, she’s back and angrier than ever. Bianca grabs the mic straight out of Asuka’s hand, and cuts a quick promo:
“Asuka… you say no one’s ready for you. But you’re wrong… because I’ve ALWAYS been ready for you. I proved that at WrestleMania 39, when I beat you clean in the center of this ring. And what did you do? You had to use that mist, that cursed, blinding mist. And you know what? Congratulations, it got you the title, but not for long. Because I say we have ONE MORE MATCH. But I think it’s time to have a match where no excuses can be made, and there are no rules to be broken. Asuka… At SummerSlam…I challenge you to HELL… IN A CELL!”
The crowd are clearly in favor of this stipulation…And it appears Asuka is too! She starts nodding repeatedly, and Bianca just stares on with a prepared look, perhaps fazed in the past by Asuka’s personality traits but now just ready to finally vanquish her and get the Raw Women’s Title back in her possession. In the remaining weeks, Bianca competes multiple times, getting the ring rust off with multiple victories, while Asuka is content with sitting at ringside for both contests…studying her competition…
SummerSlam (8/5/23): Bianca Belair vs. Asuka (c) - Hell in a Cell Match for the Raw Women’s Championship
We’ve finally made it to the Biggest Party of the Summer, and what better of a place to host it than in Detroit at Ford Field (definitely no bias as a Lions fan)! Once both Asuka and Belair are locked in the cage, the match starts at a feverish place, Bianca hitting a strong shoulder tackle only for Asuka to respond with a spinning backfist a few moments later! As the dust settles on the first fifteen seconds, the competitors look at each other, giving a momentary smirk and scoff apiece before continuing with the action. Bianca showcases her power, getting the Empress lifted in the Gorilla Press position and just hurling her at the cell wall! The several-foot fall to the floor certainly adds to the blow, and Bianca continues the assault outside the ring, slamming Asuka’s head repeatedly into the cage! However, she decides to look under the ring for a weapon, a table quickly catching her eye. She pushes it into the ring, but makes the mistake of turning her back to Asuka while doing so, the former Kana grabbing her from behind and hitting a Tiger Suplex onto the floor!
With Asuka now the lone woman standing, she follows up Bianca’s decision to look under the ring, pulling out a kendo stick. She feels it around in her grasp, getting a good feel for the damage she’s about to inflict. Once Bianca groggily gets to her feet, Asuka just decimates her back, hitting the stick ten times in immediate succession! However, Bianca’s able to dodge an eleventh shot targeted towards the throat, pulling the kendo stick to her and snapping it in half! Asuka looks briefly stunned, but not before she gives a condescending set of claps. In response, Belair grabs her, picking her up for a powerbomb and sending Asuka’s back to connect with the ring apron! Bianca then drags Asuka into the ring, proceeding to set up a table and initially primed to hit a K.O.D. through it. However, Asuka grabs Bianca’s hair, weakening her grip momentarily and presenting an opportunity to escape. Upon doing so, Asuka roundhouse kicks Belair, before getting her positioned on the table, climbing to the top rope…AND HITS A SPLASH ON BIANCA RIGHT THROUGH IT! 1-2-KICKOUT!
Despite the table spot being unable to put away Bianca, Asuka appears unfazed. She exits the ring, bringing a pair of steel steps back into the squared circle. Asuka picks Belair up, seemingly trying to hit a brainbuster on it…But Belair dodges, landing backwards on the steps before turning around and hitting a mini-elevated Spear! This leaves both women down for a few moments, but Bianca rises to her feet first. She gets in some of her signature offense, including a spinebuster on the steel steps! However, her attempt at a K.O.D. on the steps doesn’t work in her favor, with Asuka once again avoiding it. And unfortunately for Belair, Asuka is able to hit her with a suplex on the steps, this being the key factor for the rest of the match-up. With Bianca’s power lessened a bit AND Asuka’s submission hold targeting the back, she faces a tall task, and is ultimately unable to overcome it, the Asuka Lock resulting in a pass-out.
Asuka def. Bianca Belair via submission pass-out to retain the Raw Women’s Championship
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After an impressive victory at SummerSlam, Asuka has definitely proven that she’s going to be difficult to beat. But soon enough, she finds herself confronted by a potentially harmful numbers game…
Monday Night Raw (8/7/23): Damage CTRL Promo
Despite recent events not going so well for Damage CTRL, with Dakota Kai tearing her ACL and neither Iyo Sky nor Bayley able to capture the Money in the Bank briefcase, they’re still determined to get momentum back on their side. Bayley makes the bold decision to call out Asuka, saying that if she were actually a fighting champion, she’d consider accepting a match for the title. Asuka comes out, grinning at Bayley trying to goad her into a title opportunity. Asuka looks at Bayley as just another poor soul to be destroyed, but Iyo…Iyo has potential. Asuka even tells Sky…”Bayley isn’t your friend…but I am…”
This seems to get in Iyo’s head, as she begins looking questioningly at Bayley, who attempts to diffuse the situation by just pointing out Asuka being a freak who gets in people’s heads. In response, Asuka kicks Bayley square in the gut, and when Iyo instinctively goes to fight, Asuka shakes her head…I don’t want to fight you… You don’t need to be part of this…
Remaining Build To Extreme Rules:
Over the coming weeks, Bayley becomes a little more sympathetic, her intentions appearing less out of pure arrogance and more about striving to win championship gold back and improve her honor. She goes on a winning streak, but when confronting Adam Pearce about getting a confirmed title shot, he says there’s one more person she has to beat…Iyo Sky.
At this same time, Iyo looks perturbed whenever she’s on television, still at Bayley’s side but signs pointing to her being less convinced than when Damage CTRL began. And after Bayley does defeat Iyo to earn the #1 Contendership, Sky is just left sitting in the ring, staring down at the mat whilst utterly disappointed. Bayley offers her a handshake, but Asuka stands at ringside, motioning her to come roll out of the ring and stand tall with her. In response, Iyo moves in neither woman’s direction, rolling out to the entrance ramp and walking away alone, uncertain of what her future holds.
But with Extreme Rules approaching, there must also be a stipulation, and after a set of assaults from Asuka leave Bayley staring at the lights, Bayley decides it’s in both of their best interest to settle on…A Last Woman Standing Match! Asuka can try to keep putting her down, but she’s gotten back up each time, and come the PPV…The reign of the Empress will be history.
Extreme Rules: Bayley vs. Asuka (c) - Last Woman Standing Match for the Raw Women’s Championship
In a rematch of their TakeOver: Dallas encounter, the feel of the match is similar to what it was several years ago. Bayley, despite having been around in WWE longer, is the underdog, looking to prove herself against a terrorizing monster who we’re unsure can truly be beaten. The action quickly spills out of the ring, with Bayley even managing to hit a quick Bayley-To-Belly Suplex. Unfortunately, Asuka gets up before even a count of 5, disturbing Bayley. The action spills into the crowd for a while, with Asuka suplexing Bayley on the staircase and the former “Hugger” sent tumbling down for a solid five seconds. But eventually, Bayley recaptures the momentum, finding a trash can with weapons and using a kendo stick to start wailing on Asuka. And as the action approaches a set-up table, Bayley is able to not just prop her up on it, but successfully hit an Elbow Drop from a ledge through it as well! Bayley gets up at a count of three, and while Asuka is left stunned by the move, she recovers at a count of 8, continuing the match-up.
From there, the match spills back closer to the ring, with Bayley putting Asuka in the ring before grabbing a table. She sets it up, but Asuka manages to recover in time to avoid a Bayley-To-Belly through it, instead tossing Bayley to the side momentarily before going at her with a running hip attack. Asuka keeps control for a bit, but as she looks to put Bayley through the table…Here comes Iyo Sky! She slowly walks to the ring, not attacking Asuka initially, but giving Bayley enough time to send Asuka off the top rope and to the floor. However, with the action back on the outside, Asuka looks to be a bit desperate, using her signature Mist to blind Bayley! After this happens, Iyo rushes over to Bayley to try and help…But Bayley shoves her down hard to the floor, thinking it was Asuka! Meanwhile, the real Asuka appears behind Bayley, dragging her back into the ring. Asuka decides to lock on the crossface chickenwing, attempting to pass out Bayley, but this seems to only increase the fire in her spirit, Bayley able to back her into a corner to break the hold. Bayley rubs her eyes, improving her vision, and she drags Asuka to the table, seemingly able to hit the Bayley-To-Belly through the table this time…
…BUT IYO HITS BAYLEY IN THE BACK WITH A STEEL CHAIR FROM OUT OF NOWHERE! Bayley falls to her knees, slowly turning around with a look of heartbreak and pain on her face. Iyo returns the look with an icy cold stare, before Asuka pops-up behind Bayley, applying the Asuka Lock to pass the former “Role Model” out. But given this requires a ten count for Bayley to be down, and Asuka wanting to see what Iyo can do…she motions to the table. Iyo nods, getting Bayley set-up, climbing to the top rope, and hitting a Moonsault, crushing Bayley’s ribs, her friendship, and her hopes of winning the match in one fell swoop.
Asuka def. Bayley via KO to retain the Raw Women’s Championship
After the match, Sky raises Asuka’s hand, signifying the start of an absolutely lethal new duo in WWE…
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
With Iyo Sky now having made her allegiance clear, Asuka would appear set-up to remain dominating moving forward. However, the enemies she’s made over the past several months aren’t so quick to forget what transpired, which could potentially create problems…
Build To Survivor Series:
Despite having already made an impact to this point, Asuka and Iyo Sky aren’t just going to put away challengers…it’s time to take out everyone. After a singles win on Raw, Becky Lynch would be blindsided by Iyo, being laid out with several shots of the Steel Chair before a Moonsault to cap things off. The following week, Bayley expresses her dismay at being left alone, to which Asuka and Iyo interrupt, immediately kickstarting a brawl that would seem to favor them once again…Until out comes Becky Lynch! Despite having been bitter rivals earlier in the year, Becky makes the save for Bayley, the pair nodding at each other afterwards to signify a slight respect…We don’t have to like each other… but there’s a bigger threat to be stopped…
But soon enough, this action spills past just being a two-on-two situation. Zoey Stark, the former tag team partner of Iyo Sky in NXT, decides that Becky didn’t suffer enough during their rivalry after helping Trish at Night of Champions, and that it’s worth it for these veterans like her and Bayley to be ousted. Along with that, Asuka’s power and general craziness draws the interest of the Unholy Union known as Alba Fyre and Isla Dawn, the pair pledging loyalty to The Empress and perfectly willing to destroy Becky and Bayley. However, there are several other competitors backstage sick of seeing Asuka gaining an army, with Bianca Belair and the Way coming to the save to help even the odds. And of course, after a brawl featuring all of these competitors, William Regal comes out briefly to make his patented announcement:
“WAR GAMES!”
To determine which team gets the advantage leading into Survivor Series, we get ourselves a strong match in Iyo Sky vs. Becky Lynch, really the catalyst of what’s led into a two-on-one situation into an upcoming 5v5 match inside a destructive steel structure. Becky more than holds their own, but Iyo Sky shines even brighter, a cheap shot by Stark eventually allowing Iyo to hit the Moonsault and give the “heels” the advantage.
Survivor Series: Bianca Belair, Bayley, Becky Lynch, Nikki Cross, and Candice LeRae vs. Asuka, Iyo Sky, Zoey Stark, Alba Fyre, and Isla Dawn - War Games Match
Kicking off the match is Zoey Stark and Becky Lynch, with Becky initially successful in getting Zoey downed, but Isla Dawn coming in presents a problem. She’s initially able to hold her off, but a chop block by Zoey Stark and a subsequent attack of the leg leaves Becky in a rough spot. She’s able to get some assistance, with Nikki Cross coming in with a trash can lid and just whacking Zoey and Isla around with ease. However, Alba Fyre is next to come out, and upon seeing Cross staring her down from inside the cage, she grabs a kendo stick, ready to defend herself. While Nikki initially gets the advantage, Stark and Dawn are able to pull Nikki back, sending her into the steel cage repeatedly. Bianca coming in next is a game changer however, the EST taking control of the match-up and getting a slight breather while awaiting the fourth competitor…which is Asuka!
But as the rest of the field comes in, with Asuka being the last entrant for her team and Bayley for the opposite side, the action starts to get more and more intense. With all of the competitors brawling in one ring, Iyo sees the chance to hit a Moonsault from the top of the cage, wiping out everybody (including herself)! However, a table being brought into the mix benefits the bayfaces, Bayley hitting Fyre with a Bayley-To-Belly through it (she finally got to hit it… just not on Asuka). However, the ending sequence comes down to Asuka and Iyo on their feet against Bayley and Becky, back where it essentially first started…AND IT ENDS WITH IO HITTING A MOONSAULT ON BAYLEY! 1-2-3!
Team Asuka def. Team Becky via pinfall
Just like that, Iyo Sky has once again proved her worth, defeating her former stablemate to win the match for her team and cementing herself as a force to be moving forward. And though a fairly small shot, we can see Asuka glance over at Iyo, a slight frown on her face for a moment before moving back to stand with the rest of her team. What could that mean…
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Build To Royal Rumble:
Despite the result of the War Games Match, Becky Lynch isn’t through with either Asuka nor Iyo by a long shot. She fights off both of them over the coming weeks, along with picking up several singles victory, establishing herself as the next #1 Contender. And as Lynch points out, she and Asuka have history at Royal Rumble. Asuka beat her in singles action in 2019…before Lynch went on to win the Royal Rumble and headline Mania. But this isn’t about the Rumble match now…it’s time to put away the Empress.
As for Iyo, she also has a run of singles success, carrying a lot of momentum heading into the Royal Rumble Match. And soon, we learn that she requested training from one of the most respected female competitors in the locker room, a former NXT UK Champion…Meiko Satomura! While Satomura doesn’t intend to compete right away, she’s more than willing to help Iyo, with vignettes being shown of them together and Satomura even being at ringside for her matches. However, as this keeps happening, Asuka’s looks towards Iyo become more and more strained. Sky is abandoning me… after all I did for her… something’s going to change soon enough…
Royal Rumble: Becky Lynch vs. Asuka (c) - Raw Women’s Championship
Earlier in the night, Iyo Sky does indeed win the Royal Rumble match, punching her ticket to WrestleMania. This doesn’t seem to affect Asuka’s thoughts however, the Empress looking as ruthless and as calculated as ever en route to using an Armbar to submit Becky after a pretty back-and-forth encounter. And while Asuka proved herself the master of the Armbar between the pairing, Iyo Sky coming out with Meiko Satomura to acknowledge the title win seems to aggravate something in Asuka. Her grin has become a definite frown, and she stares an icy dagger through the pairing. Something isn’t right here…
Asuka def. Becky Lynch via submission to retain the Raw Women’s Title
Build To WrestleMania:
In a conversation between Meiko Satomura and Iyo Sky on an episode of Raw, Satomura asks if Sky would be willing to use her Rumble Victory position to challenge Asuka. Sky doesn’t look too convinced about doing that, which Satomura says is fine, but it’s advisable to weigh all her options. However, in the background, Asuka can be seen, carefully listening to the conversation.
A week later, Satomura addresses the WWE Universe. She’s made the announcement that she wants to have one last run before she retires, and wants to face some of the best names this women’s division has to offer…which is why she’s challenging Asuka for Elimination Chamber! Asuka comes out, her face paint being more red than usual…but while it looks like she’s having to contain herself, she shakes Satomura’s hand, seemingly paying respect to a legend.
Elimination Chamber: Meiko Satomura vs. Asuka (c) - Raw Women’s Championship
Unfortunately for Satomura, this retirement run of sorts looked to hit the ground before it could even get going. While she catches the Empress off guard at the beginning of the encounter, as time moves on, Asuka appears to be getting more and more angry. This comes to a boiling point when after one Tiger Suplex, Asuka hits another…then another…then another…then another! The ref pleads for Asuka to quit the assault, which she does…only to pull a Bryan Danielson and just start repeatedly kicking Satomura in the face! This goes on for disturbingly long, and when it’s become clear that Satomura is passed out, the ref calls for the bell, him having made the discretion for the match to end.
Asuka def. Meiko Satomura via ref stoppage
After the match, Iyo Sky rushes to the ring, checking on the woman who’s helped her out tremendously over the past couple of months. Asuka looks down at Iyo, a look of disgust on her face, before demanding to know who Sky is facing at WrestleMania. And it better be a specific answer…
Iyo Sky: “I… CHALLENGE… YOU!”
The crowd roar in approval, Asuka somehow shocked initially…until a smile comes across her face. I’m not surprised you made that choice…but unfortunately, it’s the wrong one...it’s a shame this has to happen Iyo…so much potential…
WrestleMania 40: Iyo Sky vs. Asuka (c) - Raw Women’s Championship
Despite that inner monologue running through Asuka’s head at Elimination Chamber, Sky proves why she’s not to be taken lightly. On the Grandest Stage of them All, Iyo just looks…better. Having been around Asuka for several months, she knows the mechanics of her offense, doing a good job at avoiding those signature kicks while also having the speed advantage. And at the end of the match, Sky proves herself superior over The Empress of Tomorrow, hitting the second Moonsault of the match to pin Asuka, and end a spectacular title run while opening a new chapter for another one.
Iyo Sky def. Asuka via pinfall to win the Raw Women’s Championship

I'm pretty sure that the majority of Barovian content creators have already seen some version of this list. I actually went back to update my original post of the list to discover that I never made my own post of it! I put together the first version of this list a couple of years ago. I'm pretty sure this is the most complete list of its kind anywhere: Alternate areas of Barovia that are commonly needed, besides the commonly published CoS specific battlemaps:
0) The (Dark) Carnival - nobody ever makes maps / assets for this, even though gobs of people always throw it in to their campaign, even though it's old as crap. I understand that there's a Carnival Realm in the new VRGtR book.. I'll probably never use the realm-carnival, but that's a second place the Dark Carnival maps/assets could be used. There are also a trio of third party Ravenloft carnival modules as well that they could be used in.
1) Battlemap sized maps of the towns. At LEAST a 5 foot per square / hex map for the tiger chase. (Obviously modern VTT platforms don't actually need the grid on the map. ;) )
2) Random shops, stables, blacksmiths and generic places the party is likely to go anyway.
3) Generic encounter locations.. country roads / rivers / bridges and combinations of the three. It sounds dumb because you can get generic encounter maps like that anywhere.. but it would be AWESOME to have matching Barovian roads and Svalitch woods on all of your encounter maps. Don't forget the specific crossroads with the gallows from CoS.. I don't recall if there were hanging cages mentioned, but you could throw in some PNG options for them.
4) A covered bridge, including the roof, deck and under views. (To tack on to the Headless Horseman add-in.) The Woodcutters hut as well.
5) Besides the Carnival, there are a few other old school modules that people like to bolt on to CoS (Adam, etc. etc.).
6) DragnaCarta, MandysMod and Pyram King have all developed alternate encounters and a handful of setting that might be able to use an alternate map here and there. (Orphanage.) In particular, I recall battles in/near the bogs, on mountain sides with/without roads and watch towers. Military and outfitter style tent interiors and exteriors and camps placed.. you know what? Make those camps be PNG assets that could be dropped in a bog, next to a river or on a mountain side as needed. ;) I recall Lunch Break Heroes making an encounter for Borgia/Borca, but I don't recall if they made any scenarios / encounters for Barovia. I got a special request for Beneath the Abbey.
7) The Interactive Tome of Strahd sends the party back in time and would be a PHENOMENAL set of maps to expand Barovia. Seriously, you could drop those on DMsGuild and make some bank. Some additionally pre-Strahd bright and shiny versions of the village of Barovia and other basic maps might be nice for some throw-back adventures.
8) Retro Castle Ravenloft.. Castle Ravenloft fully restored to its former glory! (Castle Barovia? I picture it as more of a walled garrison, looking like a giant stone bubble from a distance, but it did have at least one tower overlooking the cliff.) We know that the old pre-Strahd castle had multiple floors located in roughly the same place as Castle Ravenloft, but with significantly different floor plans, as the ghosts walk staircases and pass through doorways that don't exist anymore. :D (Important side-note: Strahd did not grow up in Castle Ravenloft. I believe that there is one (1) painting of him looking out over Yesterhill, through the mists at a vision of the castle he grew up in, but I don't think anyone has ever tackled it.)
9) The caverns and the alter area in and under the Pillarstone of Ravenloft (from Expedition to Ravenloft) are frequently added in to CoS. I've never seen a map of a hidden cavern entrance in the Svalitch woods, let alone a set of creepy Barovian caverns.. or the Castle side of the entrance, for that matter.
10) Around a decade ago, some weirdo drew an artistic image of Castle Ravenloft with the foundation bedrock rotted away under it. I'd like to see a detailed elevation map of the curtain wall and gatehouse with the bedrock still under the curtain wall, because that irritates me to no end. NOBODY would build a massive curtain wall on a questionable foundation. Reference Vlads actual castle (which is admittedly ten times smaller than Ravenloft) for a rather specific example of a (THE) castle built on the side of a cliff. As I recall, if looking at the gatehouse, the left side and back left corner of Vlads actual castle are protected by a cliff, and that's where the inspiration for Castle Ravenloft came from.
11)Speaking of elevation, at the other end of Castle Ravenloft are balconies and windows jutting out over the cliff. I'd love to see detailed maps of those areas, an 'ant sized' map of the Svalitch woods and Barovia as seen from the castle, and an elevation map of the cliff-side reaching from the Svalitch woods up past the windows and balconies to the Curtain wall. Parties occasionally decide to attempt to scale the cliff. Having a cliff and curtain wall that actually matches would be awesome.
12) Odd ball areas we never see. The druids must have huts or a village somewhere. The Roc must have a nest somewhere. The Mad Mage in Barovia has one of either a tower / cavern / pocket dimension somewhere. We could use Barovian flavored versions of all three. Oh, and the woods and encounters with said mage on the backside of the lake.. so a lake / forested area with spread out trees for players to run in terror or attempt to attack at range.. or whatever.
13) UNDER Lake Zarovich, there are a handful of generic encounters. There are also a few river monster encounters, generally near the Berez Swamp, could use a lair map and an underwater river encounter map, Barovia flavored. Speaking of Berez, I've never seen a detailed large scale swamp map for the Berez Swamp.. let alone the whole town being overrun by the swamp.
14) A proper Berez Swamp. A full sized swamp, with river banks, fields of cattail and reeds, murky backwaters, underwater groves of trees, and a couple of dozen oddly shaped islets and sandbanks.. a few dead logs.. not to mention a proper full sized assortment of Berez town ruins.
15) What's the village in the Adventurer's Guild Supplements?? Orasnou! There's a tiny village there (the size most people depict Berez as, because the CoS book doesn't describe the whole town of Berez properly). So that map is needed, along with.. 4 interior maps, if I recall? (Probably more, + a manor.) As well as an alternate werewolf lair and a few others, like a Barovian bluff, again if I recall off of the top of my head. I've had requests for the Gundarak villages Teufeldorf, Zeidenburg and Renika, as well as the other minor villages and..
16) The complete map of Barovia, post Grand Conjunction (done in standard modern style/graphics).
17) Various encounters have been depicted on Mount Baratok. Which would be a stark stone mountain, snowy and generally above the treeline, not like the hilly tree covered mountains where Argynvostholt and the Roc and etc. are located. I think a largish rocky encounter map of the mountainside would be the first needed. I (seem to) recall a three tiered monastery built on the side of a cliff, with a freshwater spring enclosed that would require an elevation map along with three small interioexterior maps showing the wooden stairs going up and down the cliff-side. I recall one encounter involving a lai small cave sized area.
18) Lots of people want Van Richtens magic shop and other stuff described in his escapades. We could also use a handful of Vistani Vardos and Camps. If I recall, there are only two described in the CoS book, but there are many more tribes of Vistani than that, and we're told that they move around frequently. If might be easier to provide PNG files for the vardos, outfitter tents and assets for a large scale camp. Come to think of it, there aren't a whole lot of tokens for those smallish horses they use either, so someone might whip up 10-12 smallish shaggy horses with unique patterns to show off. They don't care one ounce for a horses pedigree, and are more than happy to keep unique looking mongrel horses as their personal caravan animals. They use mountain horse stock when breeding their horses, so they would be a bit hairier and stockier then say an Arabian.. just scaled closer to a pony size. Donkey size! They're donkey sized horses. :D ..real donkey size, if I recall 5e has some weirdness going on with their official donkey/wagon sizes that makes no sense at all for Vardos sized horses and wagons like the Vistani would have.
19) The valley where the village of Barovia is located is described as a massive fertile farming area, yet we never see any medieval farms, ranches, graineries or farmers markets for Barovia. Definitely need a few of those. Barovian farmers and ranchers would SPECIFICALLY all have the buildings that (in the real world) later became fortifications, Thick werewolf proof walls and heavily barricaded doors everywhere. No window on the ground floor. Livestock was housed indoors, in enclosed courtyards with family areas wrapped around them, or with the animals on the ground floor and the family living above on the second floor. Horse stalls and farrowing areas would be fenced off within the area. Graineries would be large round wooden buildings with barricaded doors and sturdy out-buildings. 10 foot tall max, today's 4-5 story tall graineries are a modern invention. There would probably be a large stone community grainery far on the other side of the valley from the Village of Barovia. for that matter, there ought to be a functioning grainery or warehouse somewhere between the Village of Barovia and Bonegrinder. ALSO, if Bonegrinder is no longer being used as a mill, there would HAVE to be another windmill or waterwheel driven mill somewhere else in Barovia. Many artists have envisioned a water-wheel grainery on the River Ivlis near the Village of Barovia. Corn cribs would be on the second floor of a barn for drying grain, doubling up to dry bales of hay, not primarily as a hay loft. PNGs for 2-3 styles of fencing and gates, water troughs, and some medieval horse drawn plows and rakes would be nice. Dog kennels!! Every farm would probably have it's own horse pasture or rink with a training post, and a dog kennel or run for dogs to run during the day. You know those giant mastiffs that the Barovian nobles are so fond of? Yeah, the farmers in the fertile valley near Barovia would be the only ones rich enough to be able to afford to raise those pups for the nobles. Somewhere out here would be a medieval rancher set up to raise mastiff puppies with an assortment of full grown mastiffs. Mongrel pups or runts would be sold off to neighboring farms at a discount. Roaming wolves would stay FAR away from them, and werewolf packs would likely attack them for any reason at all (if they could find a way in to the basin). I picture a LARGE farmers market and stockyards just inside the River Ivlis bridge of the Valley of Barovia. We know that Barovia is a trade center.. so there MUST be one. The bridge would offer protection if needed, and it would be the closest place farmers and ranchers could set up to provide commerce with the other villages and domains and still have the protection of being inside the gates. Hmm.. they might have a dirt race track there for showing off horses going up for sale. Make that very probably, The Vistani/Romani are famous for defending their mountain horses at the drop of a hat. This would be the main place of commerce for farmers goods in Barovia. This is (the main area) where Vistani Caravans would import and export farm goods in to and out of Barovia.
20) There would absolutely be homestead (small) sized farms and ranches carved out up in mountain valleys or even on mountain sides facing south. In fact, a south facing mountain side might get enough sunlight to raise delicate crops, spices and herbs, whereas most of Barovia can't, due to the mists blocking the sunlight. Also, a couple of mountain pastures with matching rocks / trees bordering them would be nice. Honestly though, if you pass out some rock and tree assets that match the ones you already use, anybody could throw together their own mountain pastures, or even their own valley pastures. Rows of crops are hard to find though! You could easily have scenarios of wolves/werewolves hunting the party in a cornfield.. but there are no Barovian cornfield battlemaps. ACTUALLY, I don't think I have any battlemap sized crop assets, and I probably have the largest collection of map assets around. You could probably sell these farming assets/maps on DriveThruRPG and DMsGuild as well, I've never seen them anywhere. ..OR you might ask Forgotten Adventures or Tom Cartos to throw some together, whatever seems clever. :) I've been asked specifically to try to get Yaedrag (barbarian-esque village in the mountains that Dragna wrote up) made up.
21) Jenny Greenteeth's Hut.. perhaps a grove of her untainted trees from the Quivering Forest? (Also the Glumpen Swamp and Vanishing Hills, various locations within these.) I picture the Quivering Forest loaded with fruit and nut trees and songbirds fighting for real estate (the text mentions angry squirrels).. surrounded by classic Svalitch Woods half-dead spooky trees. ;) I recall seeing a couple of versions that roughly followed the description given in DDAL04, but they're just a hut, not the whole barrow surrounding her hut as described. Additionally, many artists have upscaled her hut to be a small trading post, and put it on wooden poles, swamp style (never seen a battlemap of it, though). Lots of room for creative renditions there. :)
22) Another thing that I haven't seen ANYBODY making is small abbeys. The hills and mountains of Barovia are said to be littered with small abbeys. ..some of them abandoned, some not.
23) Abandoned mansions and manors. Strahd massacred the noble families of Barovia for their involvement in his father's murder. There is one legend of a nobleman possessed by a demon that Strahd left alive, as a curse 'worse than death'. At any rate, there ought to be a handful of abandoned / haunted mansions and manors dotting the Barovian countryside for the party to stumble in to (or check out due to a hook dropped by an informative villager).
24) There are currently NO mines in the CoS version of Barovia.. bizarre for a mountain country. It would suit that some of those decimated noble families ran some mines that have since been abandoned. Of course, it wouldn't do to host your standard monsters in a Barovian mine. I'm thinking Lair of the White Worm. Something more horrifying than dungeoneering.
25) It's been mentioned that instead of murdering the losers from the werewolf trials, they might be shipped off to be slaves in a mine, or to a plantation in the swamp. The plantation would be stick construction, as you would expect in a swamp, they would collect tubers and reeds that grow in the swamp, not traditional plantation type crops.
26) The various Barovian villages NOT included on Schleys map of (Central) Barovia usually have a town sized map plotted out and published somewhere, but no really decent overview maps or battlemap sized maps of them exist. (This need might easily be filled by a couple of handfuls of generic Barovian village buildings, field-stone and dirt street assets, and sundry village constructions.
27) Besides the Gates of Barovia, there are supposed to be watch-towers dotting the landscape as well. An operational watchtower and a couple of partially ruined ones would be awesome.
​
Assets nobody has made like the Dark Carnival and lake/river encounters and the Mad Mages various lair options would be the most needed. I simply don't understand why EVERY CoS map developer doesn't provide matching roads, forests, rivers and generic shops with matching Barovian assets. The maps I mentioned which you could make money selling on DriveThruRPG and DMsGuild (to me) would just be silly NOT to make. ...Van Richtens magic shop is requested a LOT. When the party first enters Barovia, I can picture them being chased in to a fortified farm by a pack of dire wolves / werewolves at dusk (perhaps the first couple of farms won't unbarricade their doors). I'm sure you can see the utility of the rest. Will everybody need a Roc nest on a cliff above the forest? No. Will DMs derail their campaign for a minute just for the opportunity to make the party loot a Roc nest? Yes. :
Finally, I would note that since I wrote this list, a few cartographers have added some of the above locations to their Library, but the vast majority of these are as of yet, untouched. :)

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Skeeter had made an error. Not a big one, but one that did have significant downstream effects. He'd assumed that he could visit enough of each planet to give a sort of general feel to each one's character in three or four days, but it was looking more and more like he'd have to extend the stay at Corvian Home for at least a weak. He could scarecely remember being so excited by making a mistake. In most respects, Corvian Home was wildly different from Terra. From its many small islands to its ever turbulent storms, to its mediworld gravity, it was unlike any place found on Terra. It still baffled him that the xenos thought Terran gravity was heavy. The way in which it was similar had to do with the wide verity of culture, which made getting a general sense of the place a tad more difficult than planets with a more unified culture.
So, he had to ask Captain Vexkeed to extend the stay, which wasn't cheap. Additionally, it required the refund of any unsatisfied passengers who were on more time-sensitive journeys. However, it turned out that the majority of the passengers had apparently viewed the voyage as a "Sneaky Cruise," which made Skeeter laugh until he couldn't breathe when Captain Vexkeed told him. Likewise, when he told Suzie and Ivan, they found themselves completely overcome by mirth. Kip on the other hand couldn't see the humor in it. This, of course sent all three adults into the throes of hysterical laughter, which only further perplexed the boy.
The inscrutable, to Kip, Terran sense of humor aside, it turned out that apart from paying a fee to extend the journey and maybe five or six refunds, there was very little adjustment in terms of the We Bring Friends from Afar to Joyous Meeting making drastic changes to her manifest. Which was amenable to Skeeter's bank account, and his conscience. In any case, it let him fill out the itinerary with a wide variety of events from the local sporting events, to seeing interesting geological formations or particularly treasured vistas, to attending musical theater, to restaurant hopping in one of the larger cities with a conveniently cosmopolitan makeup. Even better, all of the things toxic to Humans, Doggos, and Lutrae were also toxic to the Corvians, so the risk of accidental poisoning was almost nonexistent.
"We actually discussed this in class last week," Kip was saying as the shuttle shook in the storm winds, "once a group went to a new island, the storms cut them off from the original group, except for the very few traders brave enough to fly in… well, this."
"That so?" Skeeter prompted genially.
"Yeah, for the most part I guess people would just float along with whatever everyone else thought, but I guess that's true for most places. Except, since they were separate and all, they didn't all go along the same currents, and so even islands that are pretty close can be crazy different."
"That, and it is ruining the landing shots," Ivan grumbled as he kept the camera trained on the trio.
"Well, back home rain's a good thing!" Suzie exclaimed exuberantly.
"Rain makes rye," Skeeter rejoined.
"Rye makes whiskey," Suzie laughed.
"You mean industrial disinfectant or emergency stomach purging doses," Kip said flatly.
"How'd you find out about that?" Skeeter asked.
"Greg George mentioned it in his book. He dumped so many doses in a glass that any sane person would think he was trying to poison someone with the fumes."
"Oh, I loved My Side," Suzie said, "It had always bugged me that the Lost Boys never got a fair say."
"Wait, isn't he a hero? He talks like you guys almost worshiped him…"
"It's complicated," Skeeter said, "I served on a ship with one of the Lost Boys once, Stephen the Line. It was hard to not be in awe of him. Hard to remember that behind the deeds was a man just trying to serve like me."
"Oh…"
"Were you discussing more about Corvian Home in the classes?" Ivan asked before the silence could turn cold.
"Oh, sure, lots. Like on this one island there's a big festival where they celebrate the harvest of these huge nuts, and then there's this island where they have 'Imitation plays,' where Corvians try to mimic exactly how the plays sound from other races. Tutor Brixvee showed us a video of one they coppied from the Star Sailors, and it was pretty cool."
"Do you figure she had lessons on Corvian Home since she knew we were headed here?"
"Of course," Kip said with a bitter scowl, "she's full of dirty tricks like that." His hosts couldn't contain their mirth, not that they tried all that hard.
Later that day, the intrepid travelers were in the throes of a local festival. They had surmised that it was probably related to local folklore, as various icons and masks were featured heavily, but the press was so active and exuberant, that not even the Terran implants could keep up, slaved as they were to the Terran compads with better translation matrixes than even the local networks. Therefore, three out of the four friends found themselves swept up in a feathered fury of dance and rough song, to their ears anyway, while the only clue to Ivan's immense pleasure at the experience was his swiftly wagging tail. Which the locals had no idea was the unconcealable tell that his exterior coolness was in fact, a complete sham.
The festivities seemed to show no sign of abating as night fell over the city sheltered in a rough and rocky crown from the storms of the sea, so in order to get a good night's sleep they were obliged to catch a local shuttle ride between islands to find a slightly less festive town to bed down in, and Suzie took the opportunity.
"So I hear Y'all's planet name isn't what anybody calls it," she said impishly to the shuttle pilot.
"INDEED, ahem, indeed. We know that you mammal-peoples, and the reptile-peoples, and the water-peoples, cannot do it."
"Come on, give us an example," Suzie said in that challenging, teasing way that made Skeeter both cringe and love her.
The pilot laughed, or at least Skeeter thought he, or maybe she? At least Skeeter thought that the pilot laughed, whichever sex they were. He had a hard time with regular Terran corvids, let alone these giant bird people that reminded him of the former. Then said piolet of undetermined sex made a weird clicking noise in the depths of the throat and said, "That is the name."
"I can see why y'all think folk can't do that. Hey Skeeter, why don't ya give it a shot?"
"No," he said flatly.
"Aw come on, it's their planet's name, you should at least try," she said with that wry smile she had that made promises. Promises that he had a very difficult time resisting for… reasons.
He then made a right proper fool of himself trying to replicate the sound by clicking his tongue in various ways before giving up and just saying, "I'm stickin' with Corvian Home."
After making a right proper fool of himself, the other passengers obliged to laugh at him, and Suzie turned on Kip saying, "Your turn."
Kip shot her a sullen look.
"Aw, c'mon, you gonna let these folk just laugh at Skeeter all by his lonesome?" she chided.
Kip downright pouted at her.
"Coooome oooooon," she taunted.
Realizing that she wouldn't quit unless he gave in, Kip also made a mockery of himself trying to replicate the throat clicking sound to the delight of all and sundry. "Shut up," he mumbled as he laid his ears back.
"Ivan?" she asked of her final victim.
He clicked his tongue once, and when Suzie gave him a pout he said, "That is as much as I am trying."
"Now you try," Kip shot at her.
"I know my limits, unlike you boys," she laughed to Kip's indignant sputtering.
Meanwhile, Jerry was having a less festive time. Instead of happening to land on an island that happened to be hosting a festival for one reason or another, he had purposely chosen the center of finance for his outing. He'd had a relatively uneventful series of meetings with financiers, entrepreneurs, and shipping guild heads, and various other parties interested in securing access to new markets for their various trades. It was all very productive, and very boring, and not for the first time he felt a stab of regret for the last time that he had interacted with Skeeter.
Even still, it was a satisfying day. There was a lot of troubling mentions of debts though. Jerry was no stranger to the lending industries of various planets of the CIP, and even had some Republican contacts in that realm, those who could stand his needling of the Republic's systems, but nobody he knew ever said anything about "debt masters" or "clan debt." Troubling indeed, but he chalked it up to clunky translation. Even CIP systems could have trouble with new languages, and he just knew that Republican datapads were inferior. They had to be, of course.
Still though, there was something about the references that bothered him. Something furtive behind the eyes of the avian people who spoke of either concept. Then, there was the fact that only those who were obviously startup businesspeople would speak about them, never the financers. Very troubling indeed. He resolved himself to investigate the matter if he could make the time the next day.
The following morning, the intrepid travelers went on the only "heavyworlder safe" zipline tours available on the planet, which just so happened to be in the heavily forested canyons and followed paths through the foliage designed to simulate danger. Skeeter and Kip found it thrilling, but Suzie found it merely pleasant while Ivan was actually bored by the thrilling experience. The man was pleased with getting a shot of kip chanting breathlessly, "Let's go again, let's go again, let's go again, let's go again!" Wile Suzie was more pleased to have sneakily captured a shot of Ivan's unamused expression as he sped along on the pullies.
"Sure, why not?" Suzie had said to Kip.
To which Ivan said, "Because is boring."
"What?!" Kip nearly shouted.
"You take ride in boarding torpedo, and you will be understanding then."
"The real answer to why not is I already booked a nature walk. There's this island where there's like this bowl formation full of flowers. It looks amazin'" Skeeter explained to Kip's dismay.
Meanwhile, Jerry was exhausted. He'd reshuffled the meetings so that he had mere moments between them to prepare, but he was good at his job, so long as his counterpart wasn't a Republican, and could get the proper contact details to the correct people for whatever the other party hoped to accomplish, so long as it was legal, and it all was. It was therefore by mighty effort alone that he had a scant two hours in which to seek out the information he sought before he would have to retire to sleep, or else be completely useless the next day.
He took snagged a gravcar and told the cabbie, "Take me to where you and the lads go for a spot of drink, or whatever the legal intoxicant is around here."
The cabbie gave him a one eyed beady stare and said, "Are you sure, mammal-people? The places we go are not the high class places, by the storms."
"I'm sure, I'm sure. I might not look it these days, but I came up from w working family. My dah still makes fun that I lost my calluses."
The cabbie blinked twice and raised his crest. Jerry had no idea whether that was a good sign or not, but the blue plumed cabbie lowered his crest and blinked again saying, "Sure, mammal-people. I will take you there, but do not cause the fights or my clan will have share of the debt."
Jerry thought about pressing the issue, but something about how the cabbie's feathers had puffed out and still weren't lying flat convinced him that social lubricant was the needed thing. "What is the preferred intoxicant?" he asked.
"We smoke an herb. It usually does not work for mammal-peoples, so you might not have the fun you look for."
"I see, we also have some intoxicants taken this way, do you draw the smoke through water first?"
"Yes, do you mammal-peoples do this too?"
"It's called hookah, and has a long tradition in several of our cultures. Or bongs, which have a somewhat younger tradition, as history is measured."
"Maybe then you will get the happy haze and no fights will be started, mammal-people."
"Maybe, maybe. I'm just after a good banter, and the banker types are too stuffy."
"You are right, you are right, debt masters do not laugh when you joke, they charge you more interest!" the cabbie laughed, and Jerry fell silent.
At the, well, Jerry would call it a hookah lounge, Jerry found that the lads about avoided him and shot him suspicious glances, and also found that apart from a relaxed feeling in his limbs, the smoke had no effect on him. It was a pleasant feeling, and he could maintain it by taking a draw from the hookah every two minutes or so. It seemed that was a prodigious rate of smoking though, for eventually the suspicious glances turned to those of curiosity or even grudging respect. Jerry surmised that despite his rather drab coloring, they knew an expensive suit when they saw one.
Eventually, a clearly intoxicated Corvain stumbled over to his table and sank down on one of the cushions, "Why do you smoke so well, mammal-thing-people?" he slurred.
"I am used to a much stronger herb, and this makes me simply feel good. Does it not feel good for you?"
"'Course it do. Can't smoke as much."
"Wondering anything else?"
"You a Sneaky?"
Jerry thought about correcting the error, but another glance at the state of his conversation partner dispelled the notion, so he said, "Yes, but I am not very stealthy."
"It's just what people call you… dunno why…"
"I'm not botherd, I know the reason and it's funny."
"Funny?"
"Yes, do you know it?"
"Ish a meme."
"The first one of us that the Star Sailors met was mistaken for a pet, and they named him Sneaky."
That, as planned, brought forth uproarious laughter from the intoxicated Corvian who confided, "That's the kinda thing people-things get bristly about."
"I know, people-things get brislty about all sorts of things. Like the bankers, they won't tell me what debt masters are."
"They own clan debts."
"Clan debts?"
"You know, the debts you clan has, from like way back."
"Do you mean to say you were born in debt?"
"Sssssure, isn't everybody? Well, not rich people-things I guess, but ever-peoples I knowed."
"And these debt masters, they merely collect the interest?"
"Mostly."
"Mostly?"
"If you're not… if the job doesn't pay… erm… they so like tell you to do stuff."
"Involuntary servitude," Jerry said coldly.
"Yeah, that. The hatchlings get that rough."
"Explain please," Jerry said with cold intensity.
It seemed that the intensity of Jerry's gaze or maybe the soft quality of a hammer that his voice emulated, gave the Corvian some degree of sobriety as he stammered, "Yes-yes. The erm, the uh or-or-orphanages. The hatchlings there have no parents to provide for them, so the debt masters have them do something useful."
Jerry was very close to becoming a very dangerous man as he asked, "Are the debts of these children for sale?"
"Y-y-y-y-y-yes?"
"Where does one go to buy debts?"
First Previous Next

I am 41, female. My mom is 71 and her ex-husband is 75. They started dating when I was 6 and were married for 29 years. I grew up with this man in my home as my primary male role-model. He has a number of problems including being an alcoholic and narcissist. He made my life a living hell for over 30 years - he was constantly degrading, controlling, and gaslighting myself and my mom. I honestly do not understand why/how they ever "fell in love" because from the time that I moved out of the house at 17.5 I have avoided him as much as I could without cutting off contact with my mother.
About 2 years ago my mother and stepfather got divorced. Long story short - my husband and I now own most of the property (house in FL and house in ME) that used to belong to both of them. I purchased it from her in order to finance a large payment/buy out to my ex-stepfather to make the divorce happen. My mom and he have stayed amicable but she is finally at a point where she doesn't want to deal with his destructiveness anymore.
Fast forward to the present day. Ex-stepfather has asked my mom numerous times to let him come live with her again. She allowed him to stay rent free in the FL house while she was in ME, but the house was destroyed (along with everything in it) during hurricane Ian. After that he has lived in a motel in CT near his remaining family. He asked if he could "rent" a room at the house in ME. I said "absolutely not - I own it and you can tell him that I'm the bad guy who said no" because I don't want him anywhere NEAR my 2 little kids (both girls - 7yo and 5yo). Frankly, I also don't want him around my mom!
About 2 weeks ago he announced that he found a room to rent for the summer! It's half a mile away from mom's/my house. (Incidentally, he's staying with a woman who I am 99% sure he had an affair with). He still has all of his crap (furniture, clothing, boxes) in the garage of my/mom's house where it has been for 2 years. I want to hire a mover to come and get everything of his out of the garage and move it to his new place. I am worried that if we rely on him move it himself, it will never actually happen. He will just use it as a reason to keep on showing up unannounced at my mom's house whenever he wants to. Am I an asshole for wanting to butt into this situation and move the stuff even if he doesn't want me to? I will gladly pay for the movers and give him a range of delivery dates. To be fair, I am pretty sure he will not have a place/space to store it all, but he can rent a storage unit or something right? Why should we have to store his stuff and wait around for him to pick it up? The lack of good/safe boundaries with this man while I was growing up make it feel like this is an asshole thing to do - but my brain keeps saying "MOVE THAT SHIT"!

New to the area and given the warm weather I was wondering what places could I go for a swim? Are there any free pools? Cheap day passes? What are the best beaches near here?

Construction was stalled, due to the Triaxi going on strike.
It wouldn't have been as big an issue if it was for reasonable accommodations- indeed, Gorfahn did everything the Union requested that was perfectly reasonable. he supplied them with more than the minimum required breathing masks, even though those things were built sturdier than FTL-dispersal shielding.
He paid them double the minimum required wage because they were good, efficient workers, and the pay wasn't enough to really be worth them getting it done as quickly as they were able.
He even went as far as going out of his way to buy from their favorite fast food joint for their lunches, and that wasn't even something the Union requested.
He knew more than anything that the best way to keep good workers around was to treat them with respect and give them good incentives to stick around. Which was why the strike baffled him.
They were demanding an increase in wages. It would have been fine if it was a few credits extra, the economy was kind of in the shitter and that would more than make up for inflation- he knew this because he checked with his accountant- a notoriously stingy bastard who cut as close to the corner as he could- and went above his recommendation.
But to be paid quadruple the minimum wage, he was barely making a profit paying them double, giving them a small boost in their pay would have him breaking even- which was something he definitely didn't want to do long-term. Not in this economy.
Gabriel was a damn good accountant, in spite of his miserly ways, he knew how to save an extra credit here and there without compromising Gorfahn's standards. "No way how you slice it, there's no way you can meet their demands without going bankrupt." He said.
Gabriel wasn't remorseless, just ruthless. His business acumen more than made up for Gorfahn's bleeding heart. If it wasn't for him, the company would have never found its footing.
"I just don't understand why they would do this." Gorfahn said morosely, the Udarik's spines rippling along his back. "Even if I had the money, I wouldn't agree to this, and that isn't even going into how they haven't given me a good reason for this."
Gabriel sighed, nodding. The Union hadn't come to either of them about this, and refused to make a statement regarding it. It was in his professional opinion this wasn't a Union-sanctioned strike. "We might have to resort to scabbing." He said.
Gorfahn flinched, he'd had his fair share of going on strike for various reasons, some of them he was ashamed to admit were for less honorable pursuits. He would have understood if this was a spite strike if he was a bad boss.
A small part of him wondered if he was.
"We might." He said softly. "But where are we going to find enough workers to cover the deadline? The Triaxi are fiercely loyal to their own kind, they'd never scab on a strike."
"Putting out a notice might net you a fine." Gabriel pointed out. "And getting the proper paperwork for it would take longer than your deadline. All we need is enough to keep us on track, our client might be willing to ignore a delay."
Gorfahn began to pace, trying to think of a solution, yet when nothing came to mind, he looked at Gabriel balefully. "I don't know what to do." He said.
"I have an idea."
The beach was out of the way, a solid hour's drive away. While the Triaxi were content to maintain their strike, and thus nothing was going to get done regardless, Gorfahn had to maintain that this was the only way to save his business and his reputation from irreparable damage.
He didn't know what Gabriel's plan was, but considering he went out of his way purchase a bucket and change into beach attire, it was certainly going to be something suitably unorthodox.
Especially since Gabriel hated spending money pointlessly.
The beach was busy, people of all species enjoying themselves, the Aquanti lifeguard lounging in their observation tank, a few fellow Udarik playing with a whizzer. Under any other circumstances, Gorfahn would have smiled.
Joy was a treasure to his kind, and its destruction was an indelible sin.
He followed Gabriel halfway to the shoreline, and before he could even ask what the plan was, Gabriel brought out a sturdy telescopic trowel and began shoveling sand into the bucket. Gorfahn stared blankly at his accountant, and knowing that the answer he would get would be redundant- like just 'Digging'- he knelt down and used his sturdy claws to dig.
The Udarik had evolved to tunnel, and sand wasn't good material for this. Compared to Gabriel's trowel, he was only really twice as efficient. Still, they continued to dig, even as the hole continuously filled itself in.
That's when he noticed something. A couple of Humans had approached, observing them.
"Alright, bucket's full, spread it along the beach." Gabriel said, providing no further clarification. Gorfahn nodded, lifted up the heavy bucket with ease, and started pouring it along the beach. When he came back, the two Humans he'd noticed were digging the hole with Gabriel, one had even brought his own bucket with him.
He didn't question what was going on, he simply understood that Gabriel had tapped into some intrinsic Human understanding and had summoned Humans to assist.
"Ayo, big guy, get us some water, yah?" One of the Humans said, pointing at his bucket. Gorfahn complied, setting down Gabriel's bucket, picking up the other one, and walking to the shoreline. Filling the bucket was simple, he just used the tide to fill it with water before bringing it back.
The number of Humans had doubled, as had the total number of buckets. Gorfahn set the bucket down, and the Humans immediately began dipping smaller buckets into it, pouring it into and around the hole- which practically instantly drained empty- and began digging more efficiently.
This begat a system in which Gorfahn would acquire more water while more and more humans were drawn closer and closer. in between trips, he heard Gabriel talking about what was going on with his workers. "So I brought my good buddy, Gorfahn, here to relax a bit while we figure out how to deal with the situation."
The hole widened before it was deepened, large rocks were brought over by other Humans, laid out gently in a pile near the hole, before finding a new home lining the walls of the hole. Some of the Humans had begun digging a channel to the ocean, which when finished caused every flow of the tide to send a small burst of water through the channel and into the hole, which was deep enough to hold water due to being level with the ocean.
The Humans whooped and hollered, jumping around and celebrating the apparent completion of the hole.
That was when the wisdom of Gabriel's plan became apparent.
More than half of the total number of Humans- seventy-eight of them- expressed that they were construction workers, that considering the situation and the fact that they were looking for work, they'd be willing to help Gorfahn finish on time.
Especially since the Triaxi were being dicks.
The next morning, the Humans arrived on time at the right destination, most brought their own tools, the rest made due with the ones Gorfahn provided. And every single one of the Humans shot the observing Triaxi dirty looks.
There was thankfully no altercation, and Gorfahn was more than willing to pay the Humans what the Triaxi would have earned- most tried to talk him down to a lower price, but Gorfahn insisted- and by the time the new building was complete, the commission earned, and the Humans paid, Gorfahn was sitting on a solid profit.
"If you ever need help again, hit us up. And if you need a Human's touch, we'll more than gladly help you, boss." One of the Humans spoke. They all gave him their contact information, and like a tornado were just as quickly gone.
"Now." Gabriel spoke. "We did make significantly less than we would have if the Triaxi had just done their jobs, but we still earned a net profit. I'm not saying we should regularly hire our new friends, maybe a handful per job to keep things flowing-"
"I know." Gorfahn spoke solemnly. He cast a baleful eye at the Triaxi. He approached them, the air was tense as they regarded one another.
"You're firing us, aren't you?" The ringleader of the strike asked.
"I'd be well in my rights to." Gorfahn replied. "Far as I can tell, this wasn't Union sanctioned, you didn't let me get a word in edgewise, and you nearly destroyed my business. Anyone else would tell you to never show your face around them again."
He looked at each worker, each averted their gaze. "I am kind because it is not a weakness." Gorfahn continued. "I paid you double a fair wage, keep more breathing masks in reserve on the off chance that one of you manage to break one, and I went out of my way to get you food you like, on my credit."
He swallowed back a surge of anger. "I will be renegotiating your contract with the Union, your wage will be docked by one fourth until the loss I took is paid in double, and I will be regularly hiring some of those Humans to work alongside you on the job, they will get the full wage I offer. If you don't like this, you're free to quit, I'll terminate your contract with no extra charge. As a courtesy."
He lowered his voice, taking on a tone of threat. "If you pull this kind of squaff again, your contract will be terminated immediately. Is this understood?"
The Triaxi nodded, they had never seen Gorfahn this angry before, some of them were surprised he didn't lash out at them.
"Good." He said. "You are dismissed. Do not disappoint me like this again."
Gorfahn turned around and stalked off, struggling to keep his spines from bristling with anger. He promised himself, no matter what happened, he would never allow his kindness to wane, but he was not going to waste time trying to keep people happy.
He would rather them be joyful for the right reasons.

It should have been the happiest day of our lives. Esther and I were to be wed in the middle of August after a month’s long courtship. The plans had been made, the feast was being prepared and I was a nervous wreck. How could I not be?
We formally met last fall at the harvest festival, though we’d been aware of each other our whole lives. In a small town like Sprucevale, Ohio, everybody knew everybody.
Her father didn’t like me, which I suppose is common for those who have daughters who fall in love. Her mother was too busy taking care of the younger children in the family to pay any mind to what her eldest child was doing with her life.
When I wasn’t working on my family's farm, I would walk over to see Esther. She was always smiling, and usually surprised to see me, especially when the snow was blowing and most folk elected to stay indoors close to a fire. The more time I spent with her, the more I knew she was the one for me.
As the ground thawed and the flowers began to bloom, I started working up the courage to ask her father for her hand. I’ll never forget the day I decided to do it. I rode over to their house, wearing my Sunday best and ready to do whatever it took to get his blessing. My bravery quickly faded, however, when I walked into the barn and saw him standing near his horse with a rifle.
It turned out, he was getting ready to go hunting and he invited me along. I knew I couldn’t say no, even if I wasn’t properly dressed for the occasion. As we rode out, he asked me if I had come over to see his daughter again. Stumbling over my words, I told him that I had, in fact, come to see him. When he didn’t say anything in return, I carried on telling him how I loved his daughter and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her.
I wasn’t sure if I was rambling on too much or if he was just not listening, at least until we reached a clearing where a large buck was standing at least a hundred yards away. Esther’s father grabbed his gun from its holster, took aim and fired.
The buck went down right away.
Turning back to look at me, he had a big smile on his face. After what felt like an eternity, he told me I had his blessing to marry Esther but he cautioned me to remember that day. I helped him load the buck and then rode off before he could change his mind or show off more hunting skills.
Returning to the farm, I found Esther and asked her to ride with me to one of our favorite spots. We were standing beneath a flowering dogwood tree next to the river when I asked her to marry me. She tried to pretend she hadn’t heard me just so I would ask it again before she finally said yes.
So, spring faded into summer, and we decided on a wedding date of August 12. We had a big party to celebrate the engagement and I started working on our future home with the help of my father and brother. It seemed as though nothing could go wrong, but if it had all gone right, I wouldn’t be here now.
As August drew closer, I found my nerves getting the better of me. My stomach was causing me pain from time to time, with the frequency increasing with each day.
Weddings in a small town are a big deal, and everyone gets involved in one way or another. The house was complete by the first of August and I moved in to make sure everything was right for our future family. Esther wanted to see it, but I told her she would have to wait for the night of the wedding as it was supposed to be a surprise for her.
A few days before the wedding, I confided in my father how my nerves had been bothering me and he assured me it was normal to have butterflies going into such a big event. I took his word for it, though I wish I hadn’t.
The day before we were to be wed, I found myself in a lot more pain. Not wanting to be a bother to anyone, I decided to take a walk and try to calm down. There was a trail near my new house that went along the river, and I thought the calm of the water would help. As I walked, I found the pain growing worse and worse in my stomach, until I felt like I was about to split open.
I held my right side as I walked, feeling worse and worse with each step. My vision started to blur and I felt myself falling off the bank, into the river below. I passed out and the pain finally subsided.
When I woke, I was back in my house, unsure of how I got there or what day it was. As I climbed out of bed, I heard a knock at the door followed by the voice of my brother asking why I wasn’t at the wedding. Panicking, I yelled back that I was on my way as I dressed and ran to the door. By the time I got outside, he was gone, likely back to the ceremony to tell everyone I was coming.
I hurried down the road, managing to arrive as several guests were leaving. I tried to stop them, but they ignored me as they walked past. I heard a few whispers from people wondering why I didn’t show up, some even saying they expected as much. My own father said he wasn’t surprised that I backed out after being as nervous as I was.
I was starting to get upset at them for ignoring me when I saw Esther sitting on the steps of the altar. She was staring off as if in shock, and I walked up to her expecting some kind of response only to be met with silence when I apologized.
I reached my hand out to touch her shoulder, but it went right through. She shuddered and looked around, putting her hand up to where I tried to touch her. As the realization hit me, I stumbled backwards, landing on the ground.
I was dead.
But that couldn’t be. I would know if I had died, right? I thought about falling into the river, how I had floated away. Where was my body? Someone had to be looking for me, they had to know I wouldn’t just leave the love of my life at the altar.
I tried again to comfort Esther, to get her attention, but nothing worked. She sat there, a blank look on her face, for hours. All the guests had gone home and the food was starting to spoil before her friends finally convinced her to go inside and lie down. I followed her, sitting on the bed and watching as she finally drifted off to sleep.
The next few days were rough for both of us. She kept asking why I had left her, crying and refusing to eat anything. All I could do was watch as she became a completely different person. The light in her eyes that I had fallen in love with was gone, replaced by darkness. Her friends finally convinced her to eat small amounts, but she only did it to make them go away.
Over the next several months, she faded more and more. Her parents tried to make her leave the room, but she just sat, stone-faced, as they did everything from asking politely to yelling at her. Even they eventually gave up, leaving her alone with only me to watch as she withered.
By late November, I started going out for walks when she slept. The pain of seeing her like that was unbearable. At first, I would only go out for a few minutes at a time, but I started staying out longer and longer. After a few walks I got the idea to start looking for my body, hoping in the back of my mind that finding it would somehow break the spell over Esther and she would be able to move on and find happiness again.
I walked for miles every night, looking up and down the river. After a while I forgot what I was even doing out there. The nights seemed to be growing darker, and the days were barely distinguishable from the night. The wind blew snow all around me, but I didn’t feel cold.
One morning, I returned from my stroll to find the bed, where Esther usually laid, empty. I felt relief surge through me as I believed she had finally moved on. Then I heard crying from the front room.
Walking through the house, I found Esther’s mother on a chair near the fireplace, sobbing into her hands. The rest of the family was gathered as well, but Esther was nowhere to be seen.
I was only able to take in the scene for a moment before it faded, darkness taking over again. As the light returned, I found myself in the cemetery. It was spring and a crowd was gathered around one of the graves. As I walked up, a feeling of grief overwhelmed me and I heard someone say she died of a broken heart.
As I looked around at the crowd, I saw someone dressed in white standing at the gate to the grounds. Esther had a look of rage on her face as she vanished before my eyes. I tried to find her, explain what happened, but she kept disappearing.
I walked constantly around the town, looking for her. She would show herself from time to time, always with a look of hatred before leaving again. The buildings around us faded and crumbled, but we remained.
The small town became nothing more than a legend, and we stayed. Some days I don’t even remember why we do this, play this game. Some days I can’t remember why it was supposed to be the happiest day of our lives.

MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ mention of various forms of abuse including SA, mention of suicide in some detail, mention of death
PREFACE
I understand this is the internet and I cannot expect people to have grace or mercy on me for any of this. All I can do is ask that if you’re going to give me your input, that you try and be as kind as possible. My heart is hurting and I really don’t feel I am in a place to hear that I need to entirely -drop- this therapist right now. My background of abuse and trauma will hopefully explain why that is, but I am not ready to let go. I am mostly posting this to vent, but also hoping that if anyone does have any advice that could help me even just in the short term with coping, that it will be gently shared.
BACKGROUND
I will try and keep this as short and sweet as possible but there’s a whole lot of history here. I am 27F, and I grew up in an unimaginably abusive home. Sex trafficking, severe physical, sexual, and emotional abuse from my father and my older brother (very patriarchal family), and a slew of very complicated and scary health issues including a liver disease and cancer. My family set me up to never be able to move out or live independently because they genuinely have viewed me to be their property. The severity of this can hopefully be summed up in just a few example:
Was never allowed to even get myself a glass of water in the kitchen or learn to cook Was not potty trained and had to rely on my mom to go to the bathroom into my teenage years Drinking only from sippy cups until teenage years Location monitored on my phone Every credit card transaction / finance watched closely Could not move away from college
My brother was allowed and able to do all these things, but I was not. My entire life, teachers and “adults” that were supposed to catch these things did not even bat an eye. They instead placed me in remedial classes and ESL assuming that I just had a learning disability or a language barrier (which I do not). When I told teachers in the past about my abuse, it was handled extremely poorly and no authorities ever got involved. My life felt worthless; meaningless. Like I could scream from the rooftops of my school that I was being abused and no one cared.
This past January, I did the unthinkable. I left my family and got my own apartment. Friends, therapists, coworkers, everyone who remotely knew me has been pushing me to do this for years and I genuinely thought I would die in my situation. I developed severe Stockholm syndrome so a huge part of my lack of leaving was due to my own internal thought patterns. I did it through the help of my current therapist, which is my… fourth? therapist that’s attempted to help. The last ones took advantage of how naive I was and hurt me (one of them has been arrested). This therapist, however, invested everything to get me out. He really wanted to see me free. And I am forever grateful for him.
MY CURRENT THERAPIST & BACKSTORY
I started seeing this therapist early in 2022 when I was still living with my family. I became severely bedridden and could not even go to the bathroom without my mom or dad escorting me. My anxiety and panic were at an all time high. I was on a leave of absence from work, and this therapist was the only reason I had for HAVING to get out of bed and forcing myself to drive, and most days I couldn’t even do that. He was patient, compassionate, and was willing to go to great lengths to help. Though mostly irrelevant, he’s 45M. He got into school for counseling later in life so when I started seeing him, he was just an intern under the director of the practice. At the time, the director of the practice was seeing an old time friend of mine (who happened to recently become my coworker). My friend had gotten concerned about why I wasn’t showing up to work and why I was struggling so much. I didn’t want to open up to her about it because I couldn’t open up to anyone at the time. However, my friend asked the director of the place if she knew anything about me. The director broke into my therapist’s file under the guise of “he is my intern, I can look at his stuff” and then relayed all of that information to my friend. It became an entire case against the state board and I fought tooth and nail to get that director in trouble. In the end, nothing was done and in retaliation, the director fired my therapist and I had to wait until my therapist found a new job in order to see him (he was pre-graduation by just a few weeks so he couldn’t ethically talk to me until he had another practice). During the worst moments of my life, I was without my therapist (no fault of his, and he checked on me frequently), but it was really only for a few weeks. To me that was a lot since I had been going 2-3 times a week, sometimes 4 because of my situation.
THE CRYSTAL AND THE SAGE
My therapist had gone out of town briefly and came back with a crystal he got. He told me when he purchased it he knew he wanted to give it to someone. And he said that it made him think of me and he wants me to have it. He said he wants it to be a reminder that he cares and others care and that it represents my truth to hold close. Months later, he went on another trip and said he got sage that someone gave him that was super special and he wanted me to have it. He was very invested in making sure I felt like he cares and has my back. I was never into spirituality in the same way as him so I respectfully accepted his kindness but kind of scoffed at him. It became more of a joke.
HOW MY BROTHER AND MY THERAPIST STARTED TEXTING
The director of the previous practice had tried to harass me with a fake number, as well as to my therapist. She wanted to try and get us to drop the case, I guess? When I continued to get texts from fake numbers, my therapist asked me to give him the number that was blowing up my phone. It turns out, timing was absolutely terrible. My brother (who moved out of state) was the one who started harassing me. My parents/brother allowed me to go to therapy to “work on my panic attacks” but they began hating the fact that my therapist was helping me become independent. My brother was outraged and texted me anonymously to kill myself. Because I still thought at the time that it was the director of the place, I went ahead and shared the number with my therapist. And that’s how it all began.
THE VIDEO THREATS FROM MY THERAPIST
Things got out of hand over the months. My therapist felt extremely protective of me and a “savior complex” kicked in. The reasoning for this is worth noting / important. My therapist lost his sister to suicide when they were young, and he also lost his father shortly after. His sister apparently had also been assaulted and my therapist had mentioned to me before how he views me as a friend, someone to protect, like a sister. He admitted his struggle with transference and said his main and only concern was to get me to move out of my family’s house. To take a leap of faith. He was desperate to do that. He offered to help me get an apartment near him so he could help me out, he offered to babysit my dog for me (my golden retriever is my emotional support animal that my parents have used as a bargaining chip), he offered to see me in therapy 5 times a week if I just moved. I just wasn’t ready. But my brother would not relent.
My therapist still does not know that I know this, but my brother showed me some of the videos my therapist sent him. Three separate threatening videos. In them, my therapist was shirtless with a ski mask on saying he was part of the FBI and that if my brother didn’t behave himself, that he would have his people come after him. My brother said that I was threatening him and that if I didn’t get this man to stop, it would be trouble. My therapist got extremely activated and decided to take it as a challenge.
My therapist also at some points asked my brother “how to assault me” because he wanted to know what my brother did/wanted him to admit it. But if an outsider saw the texts, it would seem like my therapist was asking to participate in assaulting me. It looked HORRIBLY incriminating.
THE MOVE OUT
I got the courage one night. Drove my dog over to my therapist’s house and moved in with a friend while I apartment hunted. My therapist was incredibly proud of me and poured so much love and care into my dog. I truly felt hopeful and optimistic and I eventually applied for my own apartment and got approved. Because of severe Stockholm syndrome and lack of knowing how to do ANYTHING, I would end up visiting home (somehow, they allowed that and I did not die!)
THE ASSAULT
Long story short (I am not super comfortable going into this part), people from the temple I was sex trafficked in (linked with my family), showed up and assaulted me at gun point in a van. I told my therapist. He was extremely upset on my behalf and called the police. He told me it was essential that I get restraining orders and that I stop going over to my parents house even if I have Stockholm syndrome. He said he could no longer be patient on that because I was actively being attacked. I told him I was still too nervous to go no contact and I could tell he was frustrated with me.
WHEN MY THERAPIST SECRETLY SAT OUTSIDE MY APARTMENT
My brother / someone from the temple decided to start things up once he figured out the person he was texting earlier was in fact my therapist. He threatened my therapist and challenged him to meet up. My brother was bluffing but my therapist took it seriously. My therapist arranged to meet him outside my apartment at 9pm that night. I had a weird gut feeling so I texted my therapist that night and asked him not to do anything stupid, but I had no idea what he had up his sleeve. Without telling me, my therapist sat outside my apartment waiting for my brother (who never showed) to meet him. Why my therapist chose to meet him RIGHT OUTSIDE my new residence was extremely irresponsible.
I went to take my dog out to the bathroom that night and my friend and I were hanging out. She noticed a dark car with someone sitting and staring with a mask on. We walked closer and it was my therapist. I yelled at him because I was so worried he would’ve gotten shot or attacked and that he would get hurt as a result of trying to fight. My therapist apologized and was so embarrassed. He awkwardly said “you weren’t supposed to know about this…” and drove off full force. We hopped in my friends car and followed him to wherever he tried to run off to. He then promised me he would leave. About 20 mins later, my friend and I decide to go out to get food and we see him sitting in another part of my apartment complex still ready to fight. I was so upset that he lied to me multiple times and that he was risking his life. What would’ve happened if he got attacked? But my therapist apologized again and said “I just need to look him in the eye” implying he was ready to kill.
THE DREAMS ABOUT MY THERAPIST’S LATE SISTER
As my therapist had told me, his sister had passed away from suicide when they were young. He admitted to have transference in a way where he viewed me in a sisterly way. For a while, I continually had dreams about his sister and it was very weird. I told him I don’t believe in a lot of things like crystals or burning sage but that these dreams felt incredibly vivid. In the dreams, her sister was assuring me that my therapist was sent in my life to be the brother I couldn’t have. That he was sent to me as a brother, and I to him as a sister.
THE HOSPITAL
Just within the span of days after he showed up to my apartment, I was hospitalized due to complications with my liver, and I reached out to my family for help. My therapist was upset with me for interacting with my family at all. My therapist even visited me in the hospital and said that I don’t need to call my family for help and that I have him and my other friends who will have my back. After I was discharged from the hospital, I asked my therapist if I could take my dog back for at least a weekend (he took my dog in while I went to the hospital in order to help me. He said he would hang onto him while I recovered and caught up on rest). So when he gave me my dog for the weekend, out of guilt, I took my dog with me to visit my family. I just felt the need to run back. My dad manipulated me a lot about missing my dog so I felt obligated.
MY THERAPIST’S FRUSTRATION
I admitted to my therapist that I had taken my dog to my parents for the weekend (after I already gave him my dog back). My therapist was so upset about it. He had put so much love and time into my dog and helping me, and then I took him back to the hands of my abusers. This is when him pulling back began. He felt like he was doing all of this extraneous stuff for me and I was just taking steps back.
THE SUICIDE METHOD
As he got over his frustration a little bit, I became very suicidal to the point where I purchased a rope and planned it out. I made him the beneficiary of my bank accounts as a thank you to him for everything. He told me he would do what he could to help me. He said I could bring my dog back to him if I just need a life break. He didn’t know I had the rope but he knew I was thinking suicide. When I went back to drop my dog off, I admitted I had a rope. I gave it to him. He realized I was genuinely going to kill myself and was so grateful I told him the truth. He told me he would be there for me to help me through it. Showed me grace and compassion and everything.
THE MAJOR PULLBACK
No warning. No indication. My therapist immediately pulled back. Hard. He told me to call him later that week (I usually have therapy 3x a week but he was out of town), and so I did as he said and called him to update him. He immediately flipped out. “Ugh, I cannot be in anything extra to your therapy space. I am going through things on my own and I need to pull back. I can’t take calls any hour of the day anymore. I can’t take your dog. You don’t even listen to me anyway. You do what you want and go to your parents. So, I don’t know what to say. I am committed to you as your therapist but that’s it. If you feel suicidal outside of that, go to a hospital and get sedated.” I was absolutely crushed and felt so awful and guilty like I did something wrong. I didn’t want to bother him. I didn’t want to lose him. He made me feel loved and cared for (platonically, as a brother) and I felt so safe with him. Until this moment. He was very hung up on the fact that I kept going home to my family despite his efforts.
After calming down he explained how he feels like he needs to step back because his emotions shouldn’t affect my therapy and that he’s doing it to help me. But it felt very selfish. He over exerted himself by showing up to my apartment and sending threatening videos when I never asked for it, all because HE wanted to. And now he pulls back because HE wants to. None of his decisions were based on what I would feel, but what would best serve him.
THE RELAPSE AND THE DREAMS
Because my therapist stepped back so hard, I relapsed and said “screw it” / went back to my parents. I still had my apartment but I backslid majorly.
During this time I was so distraught. This therapist made me feel supported. And no, I didn’t attach onto him in an unhealthy way where he became my only hope. But he did feel like the brother I wished I had, and he felt like such a deep and important part of my life and I was devastated.
I started having dreams again about his sister and I cried. I felt like I was given this gift and then it was taken away.
THE BACK AND FORTH
My therapist began telling me that he thinks I should have additional support in this season especially while he “takes a break from extraneous stuff” with me. He said when he was younger and going through things, he had two therapists.
A week later I told him I found a second therapist and he said: “ummm I don’t know. I feel protective over that. Maybe don’t get a second one. Find a support group but I don’t want you seeing another one.”
I stood my ground and said I might still find one and he said “well then make sure the other one is a woman and is closely in touch with me.”
It felt very wishy washy and he did a lot of similar things like this for a while.
But when I listened to him and decided against a second therapist, he pulled back again. He said he wouldn’t take any more texts or calls outside of session once again and made me feel like an obsessed freak when I wasn’t even really doing much at all. Or asking for anything.
VISITING MY THERAPIST’S LATE SISTER’S GRAVE
My therapist is a famous author and singesong writer. Online, it’s very easy to find his sister’s name and I did some digging and found out where her grave is located. I was feeling really awful, like I was grieving the loss myself which is so incredibly psychotic. I know. But it more so felt like I was grieving the loss of this brotherly love I once felt from my therapist. But it’s been a couple months at this point and he still refuses to take texts or calls, and is very argumentative and angry in sessions. And I just wanted to take some flowers to the grave in private, not tell him, and just accept that he can’t be what I needed him to be for me.
MY FAMILY FINDS OUT
When I went to the cemetery, the place was huge. So I had to go into the office and ask for the location of his sister’s grave. They gave me a piece of paper with her name and grave location on it and I eventually just threw it in my wallet. My dad stumbled upon my wallet while I was at home one of the days and noticed the last name and asked me if I was still seeing my therapist. They don’t like him for obvious reasons. But I admitted to my parents that I do still see my therapist and that he’s more like family than they’d ever be. They abused me. But I stood in my truth. At the end of the day I will not deny that my therapist DID help me immensely and if that means I have to be abused for the truth, I’ll do it.
MY THERAPIST INSISTS ON INFORMATION
He knew that I was hiding something. I told him my family was abusive again but I didn’t say why. He spent an entire session saying he needs to know what happened. I said no multiple times and that I didn’t want to talk about it. He used language like “you have to tell me before you leave my office” and “if you care so much about me you’ll tell me.” He even told me he was going to take my hand and promise me that he won’t react. He held it and looked me in the eye and promised he’d meet me with compassion. I refused. He then asked me if I’ve been lying to him. Deceptive. It broke me and I felt like it was just such an insult. But I stayed strong and he apologized for bothering me about it.
Last week comes around and it feels like such a hindrance. He’s continuing to be short with me and not answer my texts, not taking emergency calls, and just… is continuing to be cold. I even texted him that I was genuinely feeling suicidal and he told me he can’t help me outside of session. Period.
So then after my latest session, I told him I’d text him what happened because I was too uncomfortable to say it. I told him I visited his sister’s grave, about the dreams, everything. I said I felt really hurt at his pullback and how it felt selfish.
He responded by gaslighting me endlessly and it absolutely crushed me furthermore. He responded as follows:
“Ok crystals and dreams? I don’t believe in them. I don’t believe that was my sister. I don’t know how I feel about you visiting her grave. I am not your brother and I can’t be your brother. And yes it was a nice gesture I guess but clearly you are focusing on the wrong thing. Let’s not talk about the weeds and the details. Let’s focus on you.” And completely shut down any further conversation about it.
In the past I have insisted and begged him to process him showing up at my apartment with me because I am still shaken up. He just always says “I never should’ve gotten involved like that but we are NOT going to talk about this ever again” and has always refused to hear how I felt about it.
He went back on vacation this past weekend and refused to take my call when I needed help, refused to text me, or anything. I called off work two days in a row because I was so devastated at his anger toward me and the gaslighting. It felt so unfair. I wanted to talk to him over the weekend because I was genuinely so hurt and felt like I truly lost him. He didn’t care.
WHERE TO GO FROM HERE?
I had an appointment in person tonight. First in person one since I told him about everything. I am embarrassed and feel so guilty that I visited his sister’s grave behind his back. It makes me feel psychotic. But at least I was honest and didn’t wait until I got caught / did not gaslight him.
I have a major surgery tomorrow and he won’t help me with my dog. I’ve gone back to my parents for now until I am recovered.
I want to tell him how hurt I am but I have tried that. He never understands. I miss him. As a brother.
I ended up going to session and he asked me why I feel off in therapy. He literally said “other than me slightly having to pull back right now what have I really done?”
I don’t know if I ever can get him to see my side or my pain in this.
FINAL THOUGHTS / MISC
I was seeing him three times a week and one day he randomly cancelled my third session, and every week after “something came up” that day and he just kept canceling. Eventually he just exploded and said “I DO NOT work that third day anymore.” Without giving me any explanation or time to adjust or heads up. Like he clearly needed a break.
I was in the hospital just now for my surgery and I wanted so badly to reach out to him for support. I couldn’t. My heart hurts knowing that I once had this brotherly love in my life that I had lost.
Even now in session he uses the analogy of “if you were my sister” or “if you were my wife” after knowing I am clearly struggling with accepting he has pulled back. He used to say I am his friend over and over and now he just acts so cold. I know he’s trying to maintain boundaries. I know. But too late. He screwed with my emotions SO much.
I have horrible, horrible OCD and my brain keeps trying to do stupid things to fix this. I also keep asking myself over and over:
1. Will he ever take my dog back if I really needed him to? (obviously I can find other pet sitters but my brain is so hung up on —— if I asked him in an emergency situation, would he refuse?)
2. Will he ever stop ignoring my texts? I’ve reached out to him about being suicidal. About being in a state of panic. Previously, he would call me and stay on the phone with me while I got through an attack. I AM NOT EXPECTING THIS. I do not expect him to be available on demand. But his SUDDEN extreme pull back makes me think that I was the one that did something wrong.
3.Does this mean he emotionally does not care about me and my situation anymore? Did he just turn his emotions off? Did he ever even care? He would make me send him a text every day listing three things I am grateful for as a means to check in. He would also randomly send me quotes from books he was reading that he thought I could relate to. All facilitated by him. All of this has randomly stopped and it makes me feel like he hates me. Is it at all possible that this is a reflection of him not caring?
4.Is his pullback a temporary extreme and will he readjust and go back to being there for me? Or is this a permanent shift, likely? Can I expect things to even out or go back to him investing care and time? Again I KNOW the focus is on me having to do that for myself. I know I CAN move on from this if needed but I really, really began to love him (PLATONICALLY like family) and having him around. It breaks me so much. It was so important to me to have him.
I have been taking major time off of work and from seeing friend or leaving my house. I have completely self isolated. Refused medical treatment against doctor’s advice. Risked my job by calling off so much. Taking a leave of absence. Become bedridden. I know it sounds like I’ve become obsessed with fixing this situation and that seems psychotic and sad. But given my history with everything I have been through, this therapist had given me hope to feel like someone had my back. Losing him feels like a major major loss that’s soul crushing. Yes I have other people and no he cannot be my focus. But this is how I feel and I cannot help it. I do not want to be shamed for it. It just freaking hurts.
Again I know the majority of people will want to come at my therapist or me for doing wrong things. I know it doesn’t seem like this, but he really isn’t intentionally manipulative or gaslight-y, he’s just trying to regulate himself.
I have grace for him. And for myself. So please, please try and respond with compassion. I don’t want to lose him. But I feel like I kind of am.
What are your overall thoughts, in the most gentle way possible? Was I wrong for telling him the truth about the grave?

MASSIVE TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ mention of various forms of abuse including SA, mention of suicide in some detail, mention of death
PREFACE
I understand this is the internet and I cannot expect people to have grace or mercy on me for any of this. All I can do is ask that if you’re going to give me your input, that you try and be as kind as possible. My heart is hurting and I really don’t feel I am in a place to hear that I need to entirely -drop- this therapist right now. My background of abuse and trauma will hopefully explain why that is, but I am not ready to let go. I am mostly posting this to vent, but also hoping that if anyone does have any advice that could help me even just in the short term with coping, that it will be gently shared.
BACKGROUND
I will try and keep this as short and sweet as possible but there’s a whole lot of history here. I am 27F, and I grew up in an unimaginably abusive home. Sex trafficking, severe physical, sexual, and emotional abuse from my father and my older brother (very patriarchal family), and a slew of very complicated and scary health issues including a liver disease and cancer. My family set me up to never be able to move out or live independently because they genuinely have viewed me to be their property. The severity of this can hopefully be summed up in just a few example:
Was never allowed to even get myself a glass of water in the kitchen or learn to cook Was not potty trained and had to rely on my mom to go to the bathroom into my teenage years Drinking only from sippy cups until teenage years Location monitored on my phone Every credit card transaction / finance watched closely Could not move away from college
My brother was allowed and able to do all these things, but I was not. My entire life, teachers and “adults” that were supposed to catch these things did not even bat an eye. They instead placed me in remedial classes and ESL assuming that I just had a learning disability or a language barrier (which I do not). When I told teachers in the past about my abuse, it was handled extremely poorly and no authorities ever got involved. My life felt worthless; meaningless. Like I could scream from the rooftops of my school that I was being abused and no one cared.
This past January, I did the unthinkable. I left my family and got my own apartment. Friends, therapists, coworkers, everyone who remotely knew me has been pushing me to do this for years and I genuinely thought I would die in my situation. I developed severe Stockholm syndrome so a huge part of my lack of leaving was due to my own internal thought patterns. I did it through the help of my current therapist, which is my… fourth? therapist that’s attempted to help. The last ones took advantage of how naive I was and hurt me (one of them has been arrested). This therapist, however, invested everything to get me out. He really wanted to see me free. And I am forever grateful for him.
MY CURRENT THERAPIST & BACKSTORY
I started seeing this therapist early in 2022 when I was still living with my family. I became severely bedridden and could not even go to the bathroom without my mom or dad escorting me. My anxiety and panic were at an all time high. I was on a leave of absence from work, and this therapist was the only reason I had for HAVING to get out of bed and forcing myself to drive, and most days I couldn’t even do that. He was patient, compassionate, and was willing to go to great lengths to help. Though mostly irrelevant, he’s 45M. He got into school for counseling later in life so when I started seeing him, he was just an intern under the director of the practice. At the time, the director of the practice was seeing an old time friend of mine (who happened to recently become my coworker). My friend had gotten concerned about why I wasn’t showing up to work and why I was struggling so much. I didn’t want to open up to her about it because I couldn’t open up to anyone at the time. However, my friend asked the director of the place if she knew anything about me. The director broke into my therapist’s file under the guise of “he is my intern, I can look at his stuff” and then relayed all of that information to my friend. It became an entire case against the state board and I fought tooth and nail to get that director in trouble. In the end, nothing was done and in retaliation, the director fired my therapist and I had to wait until my therapist found a new job in order to see him (he was pre-graduation by just a few weeks so he couldn’t ethically talk to me until he had another practice). During the worst moments of my life, I was without my therapist (no fault of his, and he checked on me frequently), but it was really only for a few weeks. To me that was a lot since I had been going 2-3 times a week, sometimes 4 because of my situation.
THE CRYSTAL AND THE SAGE
My therapist had gone out of town briefly and came back with a crystal he got. He told me when he purchased it he knew he wanted to give it to someone. And he said that it made him think of me and he wants me to have it. He said he wants it to be a reminder that he cares and others care and that it represents my truth to hold close. Months later, he went on another trip and said he got sage that someone gave him that was super special and he wanted me to have it. He was very invested in making sure I felt like he cares and has my back. I was never into spirituality in the same way as him so I respectfully accepted his kindness but kind of scoffed at him. It became more of a joke.
HOW MY BROTHER AND MY THERAPIST STARTED TEXTING
The director of the previous practice had tried to harass me with a fake number, as well as to my therapist. She wanted to try and get us to drop the case, I guess? When I continued to get texts from fake numbers, my therapist asked me to give him the number that was blowing up my phone. It turns out, timing was absolutely terrible. My brother (who moved out of state) was the one who started harassing me. My parents/brother allowed me to go to therapy to “work on my panic attacks” but they began hating the fact that my therapist was helping me become independent. My brother was outraged and texted me anonymously to kill myself. Because I still thought at the time that it was the director of the place, I went ahead and shared the number with my therapist. And that’s how it all began.
THE VIDEO THREATS FROM MY THERAPIST
Things got out of hand over the months. My therapist felt extremely protective of me and a “savior complex” kicked in. The reasoning for this is worth noting / important. My therapist lost his sister to suicide when they were young, and he also lost his father shortly after. His sister apparently had also been assaulted and my therapist had mentioned to me before how he views me as a friend, someone to protect, like a sister. He admitted his struggle with transference and said his main and only concern was to get me to move out of my family’s house. To take a leap of faith. He was desperate to do that. He offered to help me get an apartment near him so he could help me out, he offered to babysit my dog for me (my golden retriever is my emotional support animal that my parents have used as a bargaining chip), he offered to see me in therapy 5 times a week if I just moved. I just wasn’t ready. But my brother would not relent.
My therapist still does not know that I know this, but my brother showed me some of the videos my therapist sent him. Three separate threatening videos. In them, my therapist was shirtless with a ski mask on saying he was part of the FBI and that if my brother didn’t behave himself, that he would have his people come after him. My brother said that I was threatening him and that if I didn’t get this man to stop, it would be trouble. My therapist got extremely activated and decided to take it as a challenge.
My therapist also at some points asked my brother “how to assault me” because he wanted to know what my brother did/wanted him to admit it. But if an outsider saw the texts, it would seem like my therapist was asking to participate in assaulting me. It looked HORRIBLY incriminating.
THE MOVE OUT
I got the courage one night. Drove my dog over to my therapist’s house and moved in with a friend while I apartment hunted. My therapist was incredibly proud of me and poured so much love and care into my dog. I truly felt hopeful and optimistic and I eventually applied for my own apartment and got approved. Because of severe Stockholm syndrome and lack of knowing how to do ANYTHING, I would end up visiting home (somehow, they allowed that and I did not die!)
THE ASSAULT
Long story short (I am not super comfortable going into this part), people from the temple I was sex trafficked in (linked with my family), showed up and assaulted me at gun point in a van. I told my therapist. He was extremely upset on my behalf and called the police. He told me it was essential that I get restraining orders and that I stop going over to my parents house even if I have Stockholm syndrome. He said he could no longer be patient on that because I was actively being attacked. I told him I was still too nervous to go no contact and I could tell he was frustrated with me.
WHEN MY THERAPIST SECRETLY SAT OUTSIDE MY APARTMENT
My brother / someone from the temple decided to start things up once he figured out the person he was texting earlier was in fact my therapist. He threatened my therapist and challenged him to meet up. My brother was bluffing but my therapist took it seriously. My therapist arranged to meet him outside my apartment at 9pm that night. I had a weird gut feeling so I texted my therapist that night and asked him not to do anything stupid, but I had no idea what he had up his sleeve. Without telling me, my therapist sat outside my apartment waiting for my brother (who never showed) to meet him. Why my therapist chose to meet him RIGHT OUTSIDE my new residence was extremely irresponsible.
I went to take my dog out to the bathroom that night and my friend and I were hanging out. She noticed a dark car with someone sitting and staring with a mask on. We walked closer and it was my therapist. I yelled at him because I was so worried he would’ve gotten shot or attacked and that he would get hurt as a result of trying to fight. My therapist apologized and was so embarrassed. He awkwardly said “you weren’t supposed to know about this…” and drove off full force. We hopped in my friends car and followed him to wherever he tried to run off to. He then promised me he would leave. About 20 mins later, my friend and I decide to go out to get food and we see him sitting in another part of my apartment complex still ready to fight. I was so upset that he lied to me multiple times and that he was risking his life. What would’ve happened if he got attacked? But my therapist apologized again and said “I just need to look him in the eye” implying he was ready to kill.
THE DREAMS ABOUT MY THERAPIST’S LATE SISTER
As my therapist had told me, his sister had passed away from suicide when they were young. He admitted to have transference in a way where he viewed me in a sisterly way. For a while, I continually had dreams about his sister and it was very weird. I told him I don’t believe in a lot of things like crystals or burning sage but that these dreams felt incredibly vivid. In the dreams, her sister was assuring me that my therapist was sent in my life to be the brother I couldn’t have. That he was sent to me as a brother, and I to him as a sister.
THE HOSPITAL
Just within the span of days after he showed up to my apartment, I was hospitalized due to complications with my liver, and I reached out to my family for help. My therapist was upset with me for interacting with my family at all. My therapist even visited me in the hospital and said that I don’t need to call my family for help and that I have him and my other friends who will have my back. After I was discharged from the hospital, I asked my therapist if I could take my dog back for at least a weekend (he took my dog in while I went to the hospital in order to help me. He said he would hang onto him while I recovered and caught up on rest). So when he gave me my dog for the weekend, out of guilt, I took my dog with me to visit my family. I just felt the need to run back. My dad manipulated me a lot about missing my dog so I felt obligated.
MY THERAPIST’S FRUSTRATION
I admitted to my therapist that I had taken my dog to my parents for the weekend (after I already gave him my dog back). My therapist was so upset about it. He had put so much love and time into my dog and helping me, and then I took him back to the hands of my abusers. This is when him pulling back began. He felt like he was doing all of this extraneous stuff for me and I was just taking steps back.
THE SUICIDE METHOD
As he got over his frustration a little bit, I became very suicidal to the point where I purchased a rope and planned it out. I made him the beneficiary of my bank accounts as a thank you to him for everything. He told me he would do what he could to help me. He said I could bring my dog back to him if I just need a life break. He didn’t know I had the rope but he knew I was thinking suicide. When I went back to drop my dog off, I admitted I had a rope. I gave it to him. He realized I was genuinely going to kill myself and was so grateful I told him the truth. He told me he would be there for me to help me through it. Showed me grace and compassion and everything.
THE MAJOR PULLBACK
No warning. No indication. My therapist immediately pulled back. Hard. He told me to call him later that week (I usually have therapy 3x a week but he was out of town), and so I did as he said and called him to update him. He immediately flipped out. “Ugh, I cannot be in anything extra to your therapy space. I am going through things on my own and I need to pull back. I can’t take calls any hour of the day anymore. I can’t take your dog. You don’t even listen to me anyway. You do what you want and go to your parents. So, I don’t know what to say. I am committed to you as your therapist but that’s it. If you feel suicidal outside of that, go to a hospital and get sedated.” I was absolutely crushed and felt so awful and guilty like I did something wrong. I didn’t want to bother him. I didn’t want to lose him. He made me feel loved and cared for (platonically, as a brother) and I felt so safe with him. Until this moment. He was very hung up on the fact that I kept going home to my family despite his efforts.
After calming down he explained how he feels like he needs to step back because his emotions shouldn’t affect my therapy and that he’s doing it to help me. But it felt very selfish. He over exerted himself by showing up to my apartment and sending threatening videos when I never asked for it, all because HE wanted to. And now he pulls back because HE wants to. None of his decisions were based on what I would feel, but what would best serve him.
THE RELAPSE AND THE DREAMS
Because my therapist stepped back so hard, I relapsed and said “screw it” / went back to my parents. I still had my apartment but I backslid majorly.
During this time I was so distraught. This therapist made me feel supported. And no, I didn’t attach onto him in an unhealthy way where he became my only hope. But he did feel like the brother I wished I had, and he felt like such a deep and important part of my life and I was devastated.
I started having dreams again about his sister and I cried. I felt like I was given this gift and then it was taken away.
THE BACK AND FORTH
My therapist began telling me that he thinks I should have additional support in this season especially while he “takes a break from extraneous stuff” with me. He said when he was younger and going through things, he had two therapists.
A week later I told him I found a second therapist and he said: “ummm I don’t know. I feel protective over that. Maybe don’t get a second one. Find a support group but I don’t want you seeing another one.”
I stood my ground and said I might still find one and he said “well then make sure the other one is a woman and is closely in touch with me.”
It felt very wishy washy and he did a lot of similar things like this for a while.
But when I listened to him and decided against a second therapist, he pulled back again. He said he wouldn’t take any more texts or calls outside of session once again and made me feel like an obsessed freak when I wasn’t even really doing much at all. Or asking for anything.
VISITING MY THERAPIST’S LATE SISTER’S GRAVE
My therapist is a famous author and singesong writer. Online, it’s very easy to find his sister’s name and I did some digging and found out where her grave is located. I was feeling really awful, like I was grieving the loss myself which is so incredibly psychotic. I know. But it more so felt like I was grieving the loss of this brotherly love I once felt from my therapist. But it’s been a couple months at this point and he still refuses to take texts or calls, and is very argumentative and angry in sessions. And I just wanted to take some flowers to the grave in private, not tell him, and just accept that he can’t be what I needed him to be for me.
MY FAMILY FINDS OUT
When I went to the cemetery, the place was huge. So I had to go into the office and ask for the location of his sister’s grave. They gave me a piece of paper with her name and grave location on it and I eventually just threw it in my wallet. My dad stumbled upon my wallet while I was at home one of the days and noticed the last name and asked me if I was still seeing my therapist. They don’t like him for obvious reasons. But I admitted to my parents that I do still see my therapist and that he’s more like family than they’d ever be. They abused me. But I stood in my truth. At the end of the day I will not deny that my therapist DID help me immensely and if that means I have to be abused for the truth, I’ll do it.
MY THERAPIST INSISTS ON INFORMATION
He knew that I was hiding something. I told him my family was abusive again but I didn’t say why. He spent an entire session saying he needs to know what happened. I said no multiple times and that I didn’t want to talk about it. He used language like “you have to tell me before you leave my office” and “if you care so much about me you’ll tell me.” He even told me he was going to take my hand and promise me that he won’t react. He held it and looked me in the eye and promised he’d meet me with compassion. I refused. He then asked me if I’ve been lying to him. Deceptive. It broke me and I felt like it was just such an insult. But I stayed strong and he apologized for bothering me about it.
Last week comes around and it feels like such a hindrance. He’s continuing to be short with me and not answer my texts, not taking emergency calls, and just… is continuing to be cold. I even texted him that I was genuinely feeling suicidal and he told me he can’t help me outside of session. Period.
So then after my latest session, I told him I’d text him what happened because I was too uncomfortable to say it. I told him I visited his sister’s grave, about the dreams, everything. I said I felt really hurt at his pullback and how it felt selfish.
He responded by gaslighting me endlessly and it absolutely crushed me furthermore. He responded as follows:
“Ok crystals and dreams? I don’t believe in them. I don’t believe that was my sister. I don’t know how I feel about you visiting her grave. I am not your brother and I can’t be your brother. And yes it was a nice gesture I guess but clearly you are focusing on the wrong thing. Let’s not talk about the weeds and the details. Let’s focus on you.” And completely shut down any further conversation about it.
In the past I have insisted and begged him to process him showing up at my apartment with me because I am still shaken up. He just always says “I never should’ve gotten involved like that but we are NOT going to talk about this ever again” and has always refused to hear how I felt about it.
He went back on vacation this past weekend and refused to take my call when I needed help, refused to text me, or anything. I called off work two days in a row because I was so devastated at his anger toward me and the gaslighting. It felt so unfair. I wanted to talk to him over the weekend because I was genuinely so hurt and felt like I truly lost him. He didn’t care.
WHERE TO GO FROM HERE?
I had an appointment in person tonight. First in person one since I told him about everything. I am embarrassed and feel so guilty that I visited his sister’s grave behind his back. It makes me feel psychotic. But at least I was honest and didn’t wait until I got caught / did not gaslight him.
I have a major surgery tomorrow and he won’t help me with my dog. I’ve gone back to my parents for now until I am recovered.
I want to tell him how hurt I am but I have tried that. He never understands. I miss him. As a brother.
I ended up going to session and he asked me why I feel off in therapy. He literally said “other than me slightly having to pull back right now what have I really done?”
I don’t know if I ever can get him to see my side or my pain in this.
FINAL THOUGHTS / MISC
I was seeing him three times a week and one day he randomly cancelled my third session, and every week after “something came up” that day and he just kept canceling. Eventually he just exploded and said “I DO NOT work that third day anymore.” Without giving me any explanation or time to adjust or heads up. Like he clearly needed a break.
I was in the hospital just now for my surgery and I wanted so badly to reach out to him for support. I couldn’t. My heart hurts knowing that I once had this brotherly love in my life that I had lost.
Even now in session he uses the analogy of “if you were my sister” or “if you were my wife” after knowing I am clearly struggling with accepting he has pulled back. He used to say I am his friend over and over and now he just acts so cold. I know he’s trying to maintain boundaries. I know. But too late. He screwed with my emotions SO much.
I have horrible, horrible OCD and my brain keeps trying to do stupid things to fix this. I also keep asking myself over and over:
1. Will he ever take my dog back if I really needed him to? (obviously I can find other pet sitters but my brain is so hung up on —— if I asked him in an emergency situation, would he refuse?)
2. Will he ever stop ignoring my texts? I’ve reached out to him about being suicidal. About being in a state of panic. Previously, he would call me and stay on the phone with me while I got through an attack. I AM NOT EXPECTING THIS. I do not expect him to be available on demand. But his SUDDEN extreme pull back makes me think that I was the one that did something wrong.
3.Does this mean he emotionally does not care about me and my situation anymore? Did he just turn his emotions off? Did he ever even care? He would make me send him a text every day listing three things I am grateful for as a means to check in. He would also randomly send me quotes from books he was reading that he thought I could relate to. All facilitated by him. All of this has randomly stopped and it makes me feel like he hates me. Is it at all possible that this is a reflection of him not caring?
4.Is his pullback a temporary extreme and will he readjust and go back to being there for me? Or is this a permanent shift, likely? Can I expect things to even out or go back to him investing care and time? Again I KNOW the focus is on me having to do that for myself. I know I CAN move on from this if needed but I really, really began to love him (PLATONICALLY like family) and having him around. It breaks me so much. It was so important to me to have him.
I have been taking major time off of work and from seeing friend or leaving my house. I have completely self isolated. Refused medical treatment against doctor’s advice. Risked my job by calling off so much. Taking a leave of absence. Become bedridden. I know it sounds like I’ve become obsessed with fixing this situation and that seems psychotic and sad. But given my history with everything I have been through, this therapist had given me hope to feel like someone had my back. Losing him feels like a major major loss that’s soul crushing. Yes I have other people and no he cannot be my focus. But this is how I feel and I cannot help it. I do not want to be shamed for it. It just freaking hurts.
Again I know the majority of people will want to come at my therapist or me for doing wrong things. I know it doesn’t seem like this, but he really isn’t intentionally manipulative or gaslight-y, he’s just trying to regulate himself.
I have grace for him. And for myself. So please, please try and respond with compassion. I don’t want to lose him. But I feel like I kind of am.
What are your overall thoughts, in the most gentle way possible? Was I wrong for telling him the truth about the grave?

After International Incident, Roman takes a couple of months off before coming back for a match against Seth Rollins at Survivor Series, as that show will go back to being battle of the brands, and WarGames will get its own pay-per-view in December.
Survivor Series: Before the show, it is announced that there will be 9 matches pitting Raw superstars against SmackDown superstars, with the brand that wins the most matches getting to pick 2 superstars from the other brand's roster. One of these matches features Roman Reigns facing Seth Rollins. Solo and Fatu attempt to interfere on Roman's behalf, but The Usos keep them from doing so. Roman becomes distracted by the fighting on the outside, allowing Rollins to capitalize by hitting him with a Pedigree. 1, 2, 3, Seth Rollins becomes the first person to score a pinfall or submission win over Roman Reigns in nearly 4 years. Roman is irate, and after the match, he goes outside, grabs a steel chair, then goes back into the ring and attacks Seth with the chair. Seth is out cold, which allows Kevin Owens to cash in his Money in the Bank briefcase on Rollins, becoming the new World Heavyweight Champion.
WarGames: After Survivor Series, SmackDown was allowed to pick 2 superstars from Raw to join their roster. One of those superstars was Cody Rhodes. The WarGames match is Roman Reigns, Jacob Fatu, Solo Sikoa, Kevin Owens vs Jey Uso, Jimmy Uso, Sami Zayn, Cody Rhodes. Cody gets the win for his team by pinning Solo, getting revenge on the man who cost him the title at Wrestlemania earlier in the year.

Theres a lengthy backstory to all of this, so I’ll do my best to keep the post succinct and fill in information as needed.
‘03 325i, ~230k miles
In March, my car developed a bad misfire that appeared to correlate with staying at highway speeds over an extended period of time (+/- 45mins). I take it for maintenance quarterly, so handed it over to my mechanic to figure out. He changed all plugs and coils (which were due anyways), MAF sensor (I asked for this), oil change (also asked for this), and secondary air pump. It was throwing codes for SAS and misfires on multiple cylinders, so this all seems to match up. Had it back for two days, boom, same issue popped up. Same SAS code. He said it was the EGR valve, so I ordered this.
While waiting for the valve, I had a sudden no crank, no start. Towed it to him, he said it was the starter (and also spoke to a couple other mechanics who agreed as well). Pulled out everything, changed the starter and put a new gasket in the intake manifold, still no crank. Scanned it, threw a code for the EWS. This led to my car sitting for nearly two months while they tried to find someone to fix the computer issue.
I got it back two days ago, and it still has a misfire, albeit not one that impedes the driving ability. Scanned it again today, and here’s what I’m getting:
2883 - Mixture preparation, bank 2 mixture too lean 2882 - Mixture preparation, bank 1 mixture too lean 27C3 - Thermal oil level sensor 2761 - Secondary air system (same as the one previously “fixed”)
Oil level sensor has been ordered. At this point, the secondary air pump, EGR valve, and vacuum hose have been replaced. All are OEM. I’m concerned something with my intake manifold wasn’t put back together properly. When I asked what to do about the lean codes, I was told it “could be anything”. I’m incredibly new to all of this. From what I understand, a lean code means too much air is getting into the system? Where should I start looking? FWIW, the misfire isn’t happening under consistent conditions.
For the sake of productivity, no need to comment on how to deal with my (former) mechanic.