Previous post
Me (M44, baptized & faded) and my brother (42, never baptized) met with our sister (33, PIMI) over the weekend. The chat with my sister went well. No shouting, accusing or anger. We did discuss more topics than we intended to. She would listen to what we said and take notes on her phone to research later.
​
Sadly, my BiL (about 31) told her he wants to divorce. He send his DA letter a week ago and told her about divorcing around that time. Months earlier, when she reacted emotionally to his doubts, my sister had told him she would divorce him if he no longer believed. However she doesn’t really want a divorce. Also when BiL once mentioned he was thinking about getting a tattoo, she told him to not get one while they’re married.
​
I asked her if she’d told him that she doesn’t actually want a divorce. She said she only told him she still loves him. I told her maybe he thinks that’s still what you want and if you tell him clearly that it was just an emotional reaction in the moment, he might rethink it. I hope that's the case, but it's also possible he's made up his mind. Personally I think, if one side really wants out of the marriage, you should let them go. I hope they can figure things out. Her currently still believing and him not, obviously makes it complicated. Luckily there are no kids involved. I believe they were waiting for paradise.
​
And about the tattoo, both me and my brother told her that it's just a tattoo and as long as it's not like a face tattoo or something offensive it's not a big deal and that we personally don't have an issue with it. I guess my BiL is trying to figure out who he really is. He had a controlling father and being a JW, I guess he never really could do what he wanted, but mostly did only what was expected. Many of us here are probably familiar with missing out during their youth and the unhealthy expectations. Both his parents already passed away before the pandemic, so relatively young. He might be dealing with that again too, now that he woke up.
​
I don't want to make the post too long. I'll post more about what we discussed about TATT and how my BiL woke up in another post.

I recently started a game with the Northern Raiders origin. Wanted to go with a Slavic theme, named my band the Sons of Veles, gave my starting guys Slavic names. Only one of them survived the initial battles, however. Later on I decided that every time I'm in town that has a barber, every bro that has scored a kill will get tattoos and his name changed to a Slavic one, as sort of an initiation rite.
It's sorta funny when the mercs in question are southern, but the whole thing is pretty much just a company tradition/LARP/PR, whatever you may call it. Also makes it easy after battles to quickly see if I lost any of my main guys.
Let me tell you that this stupid little thing made my enjoyment of the game go through the roof.
​
Wouldn't work with a Norse theme, because with the general Germanic flavour many men already have Nordic names. But I'm gonna try with a Latin theme next time (Lost/Last Legion as the name, renaming them to Roman names at some point), or with ASOIAF Unsullied, shave their head, rename them Grey Worm or Frail Dog (no castration though ;)).
Share your experience. Do you role-play in Battle Brothers?

I just started doing ketamine treatments again today. And man I feel like shit. I’m so nauseas from the meds. The doctors did prescribe me for Zofran but ooof, it’s still kicking my ass.
When I went into the k-hole, I started thinking about how much trauma I have from the Pentacostal religion. I’ve not gone to church in YEARS. But I still carry around a lot of baggage from the religion.
Have ya’ll seen the new Happy Shiny People (I think that’s what it called)? It’s the new documentary on the Duggers. Those weirdos who had a fuck-ton of kids.
I lived in the same town with them and attended a different branch of their religion. Which is Pentacostal. And man, since the release of the documentary I’ve been so anxious. It has me absolutely triggered and my anxiety has been through roof. I haven’t gotten the chance to watch the documentary because I’ve been so fragile and vulnerable. And also heartbreaking because the girls were very sweet and kind to me when we were all young. I can’t even imagine the horrors they’re still hiding. We all knew something was seriously wrong with them but everybody in town turned a blind eye because of their tv show and their affiliation with their church. They were hot shots 🙄
I wouldn’t wish the Pentecostal religion on my worst enemy. And I fucking mean it. All of my trauma happend over 20 years ago but I carry it with me everywhere.
On top of all the ridiculous rules… never cut your hair, only wear dresses or long skirts that hid your legs, there was one time the pastor told us to break all of our TV’s because they were a gateway to Hell and demons are coming through the TV to corrupt your family. The rules were manageable for the most part. Annoying but easy to deal with. Hell… I didn’t start wearing jeans until I was 13 and caught a rebellious streak. My precious grandma was so excited to take me to buy my first pair of jeans. And it will forever be one of my favorite memories.
Okay so I’m 30 now and the stuff that happened to me between the age of 5-10 years old shaped me to be the anxious dummy I am today. I strongly believe that I was too young to experience this type of fear and my brain wires got a little crossed during development.
The church taught horrifying things. Demon possession being the scariest and what really fucked up my tiny brain. I wish I could hug the littler version of me and tell her we grew up to be really bad ass and we’ve never had to deal with “demons” . I’m almost head to toe covered in tattoos, hairs cut, and wearing whatever I want. Little me would have thought adult me is so perfect. But I can’t make it better for baby me. I can only protect my peace now.
I don’t remember a single Sunday service or Wednesday service where the preacher wasn’t screaming from the pulpit that we were all going to be dragged to a hell if we didn’t follow the rules. Most of our teachings were based around the book of revelations and iykyk. It’s scary. And especially scary to a young kid. The church would call our members of the congregation and tell them “you have a demon in you, we gotta heal you” which was always followed by a horrifying “exorcism” in front of the congregation. Even the children… we were all made to bare witness to the power of God. On top of the insane exorcisms, they were HUGE on the Holy Ghost. If you couldn’t get the Holy Ghost and start speaking in tongues, you could never be baptized and that’s your one way ticket to hell. I spent a good portion of my childhood praying and begging god to fill me with the Holy Ghost so I wouldn’t be separated from my family when the rapture happened. Sunday after Sunday, I would stand in front of the congregation with the hands of my fellow Brothers and Sisters (that’s what the adults were called) touching me while I cried and begged for the Holy Ghost. But it never happened. I was left confused and scared because kids younger than me had spoken in tongues and been baptized. My fear of being burned alive and used as a demon play toy (not my words, their words) grew stronger and stronger with each passing Sunday. I thought something was wrong with me. Why is god ignoring me? I was a good child and I studied my bible every night and I didn’t dare break the rules. It never happened tho. And at a young age I had come to terms that I must not be worthy of salvation. For a brief moment, I thought maybe I was a demon myself and that’s why god didn’t want me.
There wasn’t another little girl in the world that wanted to be baptized more than I did. One Sunday I was frustrated and scared. I was overwhelmed with how many church members were surrounding me, placing their hands on me, and speaking tongues themself. I faked it. I faked speaking in tongues because I wasn’t baptized and my preacher was always telling us that the rapture was just around the corner so we better lock in our faith. Or be damned to survive 7 years of torment on earth. I couldn’t take it anymore I had to be baptized. I didn’t wanna stay on earth while my family was going to Heaven. After I spoke in “tongues” that service, the pastor still refused to baptize me because he didn’t believe me. Do you know how crushing this was to a child? God must not love me, right? I’m not worthy of God’s love and evil, I guess.
All of my anxieties started there at the hands of a bunch of religious quacks. I’ve spent my entire adult life wanting to turn back time so I could rebel against the religion sooner than 13 years old.
Anyways… I feel a little better venting about this. I just wish I could put all of it behind me but the trauma and anxiety will probably stay with me the rest of my life. But thankfully I’ve been in counseling for years and I have the best psychiatrist. So hopefully this is what healing looks like. I might watch the documentary but it’s going to be hard because the Dugger girls were so sweet and kind to me. And seeing what they went through might make me vomit.

Wanted to wait until I finished the series to post this, but I couldn’t…just had to say Marsh is such an amazing character and I can’t be the only one who thinks so…right?
I love the juxtaposition of being both in a tragic position and still completely badass. I mean, this poor guy, he spends his life trying to keep his brother in line and raise him after their mother is killed, only to have Kelsier end up a thief and marry the woman Marsh loves, who then dies. Then Kelsier comes back and has this grand scheme to free all the Skaa, which is only something Marsh has spent his whole life trying to do with no luck. Finally, Kelsier becomes a religious figure in death and Marsh is left without a brother, without eyes, and without much credit for his own heroic acts. Sanderson never fails to mention how stern Marsh is, but how is that any surprise given his life?
At the same time, Marsh is a total badass. He’s not happy about having one of the “weakest” allomantic powers, but is still incredibly skilled at using it. And can we mention how hardcore you gave be to get complete eye tattoos to infiltrate the Ministry? That’s a level of commitment that most don’t have. Oh, and just casually dusting, what 10+ Inquisitors at once?
Obviously I was very upset when he fought Sazed but I still found myself liking even evil Marsh. And while I do hope for a redemption arc for him, the juxtaposition of Kelsier being raised to hero status following a life of mostly thinking of himself, to Marsh, self righteous and moral all his life, descending into villainy makes reading more interesting. Vin, Elend and Sazed are also realizing more and more what they are capable of in WoA but Marsh is on an opposite path.
Curious to hear other thoughts on his charactewhich other characters you love?
Just finished reading Well of Ascension and immediately went onto Hero of Ages because I am hooked, but please no spoilers for that book (although I did read the prologue and can’t wait for the rest!)

Prices FIRM - CashApp/Venmo/PayPal Friends & Family
Disney/Marvel titles are split codes. Only redeem what you pay for. Thank you.
12 Monkeys (1995) (MA/4K) $3.50
12 Years a Slave (2013) (MA/HD) $3.50
13 Hours: Secret Soldiers of Benghazi (2016) (Vudu/4K) $5.50 (Vudu/HD) $2 (iTunes/4K) $3
1917 (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3.50
2 Guns (2013) (MA/HD) $4.75 (iTunes/HD) $3.50
2012 (2009) (MA/4K) $6.50
21 Jump Street (2012) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $2.75
22 Jump Street (2014) (MA/HD) $4.50
355, The (2022) (MA/HD) $5.75
47 Meters Down (2017) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
47 Ronin (2013) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $4 (MA/HD) $3.50
A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood (2019) (MA/HD) $5.75
A Clockwork Orange (1972) (MA/4K) $6.50
A Man Called Otto (2022) (MA/HD) $7.25
A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4.25
A Monster Calls (2016) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
A Vigilante (2018) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.50
A Wrinkle in Time (2018) (MA/HD) $3
Abominable (2019) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $6.25
Action Point (2018) (Vudu/HD) $2.25 (iTunes/4K) $1.50
Ad Astra (2019) (MA/HD) $4.75
Adventures of Tintin (2011) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
After Earth (2013) (MA/HD) $2.50
Aladdin (1992) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $3.25 (GP/HD) $2.25
Aladdin (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.25 (GP/HD) $1.50
Alice in Wonderland (1951) (GP/HD) $5.50
Alien (1979) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5
Alien 3 (1992) (MA/HD) $5.50
Alien Collection 1-6 (MA/HD) $19.50 1-4 (MA/SD) $9
Alien Resurrection (1997) (MA/HD) $5.50
Aliens (1986) (MA/HD) $5.50
Alita: Battle Angel (2019) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $4
All The Money In The World (2017) (MA/HD) $4.25
All the Way (2016) (GP/HD) $3.50 No Port
Aloha (2015) (MA/HD) $2.50
Amazing Spider-Man (2012) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Ambulance (2022) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4
American Beauty (1999) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $6
American Gangster (Extended Edition) (2007) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $6.25
American Made (2017) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $4.25
American Sniper (2014) (MA/4K) $6.50
American Underdog (2021) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.75
Amsterdam (2022) (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3.75
Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (2013) (iTunes/HD) $2
Angry Birds Movie (2016) (MA/HD) $3.75
Antlers (2021) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $4
Ant-Man (2015) (MA/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2.25
Ant-Man and the Wasp (2018) (MA/4K) $8 (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (GP/HD) $3.25
Apollo 11 (2019) (MA/HD) $6.25
Apollo 13 (1995) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $4.75
Aqua Teen Forever: Plantasm (2022) (MA/HD) $4.75
Artist, The (2011) (MA/HD) $6
Atomic Blonde (2017) (MA/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) $3.25 (MA/HD) $2.25
Avengers 1-4 (MA/4K) $25 (iTunes/4K) $20 (GP/HD) $7.75
Babylon (2022) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $6.25
Back to the Future (1985) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.25
Back to the Future Collection 1-3 (MA/4K) $15 (MA/HD) $7.50
Bad Boys Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $12
Bad Boys for Life (2020) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $3.50
Bad Guys, The (2022) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $4.25
Bad Moms (2016) (MA/HD) $3.50 (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Bad Times at The El Royale (2018) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $5.75
Bambi (1942) (MA/HD) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.50
Bambi II (2006) (MA/HD) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.50
Band of Brothers (2001) (GP/HD) $3.75 No Port
Bank Job, The (2008) (Vudu/HD) $3.25
Banshees of Inisherin (2022) (GP/HD) $4.50
Batman and Superman: Battle of the Super Sons (2022) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $4.50
Batman Year One (2011) (MA/4K) $5
Batman, The (2022) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $3
Batman: Soul of the Dragon (2021) (MA/4K) $6
Batman: The Doom That Came to Gotham (2022) (MA/4K) $7.50
Batman: The Long Halloween Deluxe Edition (2022) (MA/HD) $6
Battle: Los Angeles (2011) (MA/4K) $6.50
Battleship (2012) (MA/4K) $4.50 (MA/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/4K) $3
Beast (2022) (MA/HD) $5.75
Beauty and the Beast (1991) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $2
Beauty and the Beast (2017) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $3.25 (GP/HD) $2
Bedknobs and Broomsticks (1971) (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3.50
Beguiled, The (2017) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4
Being John Malkovich (1999) (MA/HD) $3.50
Beirut (2018) (MA/HD) $4.75
Ben-Hur (2016) (Vudu/HD) $2.50
BFG, The (2016) (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $3.50
Big (1988) (MA/HD) $5.75
Big Wedding (2013) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
Billy Elliot (2000) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.25
Black Adam (2022) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $4.25
Black Panther (2018) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $4.25 (GP/HD) $1.75
Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (2022) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $2.50
Black Phone, The (2021) (MA/HD) $5
Black Swan (2010) (MA/HD) $4.50
Black Widow (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $3.25
Blacklight (2022) (MA/HD) $4.25
Bleed for This (2016) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4
Blockers (2018) (MA/HD) $3
Blood Father (2016) (Vudu/HD) $4
Bloodshot (2020) (MA/HD) $4
Blues Brothers + Unrated (1980) (MA/4K) $7
Bob's Burgers Movie (2022) (MA/HD) $3.25 (GP/HD) $2.25
Bodies Bodies Bodies (2022) (Vudu/4K) $6.75
Bodyguard, The (1992) (MA/HD) $5
Bohemian Rhapsody (2018) (MA/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $3.25
Bolt (2008) (MA/HD) $8 (GP/HD) $5.50
Bond: Goldfinger (1964) (Vudu/HD) $7
Bond: Skyfall (2012) (Vudu/HD) $1
Bond: Spectre (2015) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Book of Henry (2017) (iTunes/HD) Ports $5
Book of Life (2014) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Booksmart (2019) (MA/HD) $5.25
Boss Baby (2017) & Family Business (2021) (MA/HD) $5.75
Boss Baby: Family Business (2021) (MA/HD) $4.50
Bourne Collection 1-5 (MA/4K) $25 (iTunes/HD) $19 (MA/HD) $15
Boy Next Door, The (2015) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $5.25
Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992) (MA/4K) $7
Braven (2018) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Breakdown (1997) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.75
Breakfast Club (1985), Weird Science (2008), Sixteen Candles (1984) (MA/HD) $11.50
Breakthrough (2019) (MA/4K) $6.50
Brian Banks (2019) (MA/HD) $4.25
Bridge of Spies (2015) (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $3.75
Bring It On: Worldwide #Cheersmack (2017) (MA/HD) $3.25 (iTunes/HD) $1.25
Broken City (2013) (MA/HD) $3.50 (iTunes/SD) $1.25
Broken Hearts Gallery (2020) (MA/HD) $3.75
Brothers (2009) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Buffy, the Vampire Slayer (1992) (MA/HD) $5.75
Bullet Train (2022) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $4.25
Cake (2014) (MA/HD) $5.25
Call Me by Your Name (2017) (MA/HD) $5.75
Call of the Wild (2020) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $1.50 (GP/HD) $1.25
Call, The (2013) (MA/HD) $4.50
Captain America: Civil War (2016) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $5 (GP/HD) $2.25
Captain America: Winter Soldier (2014) (MA/4K) $7.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $6 (GP/HD) $2.25
Captain Marvel (2019) (MA/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) $4 (GP/HD) $1.75
Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie (2017) (MA/HD) $3.25
Carrie (2013) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Cars 1-3 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $15.50 (GP/HD) $9
Casablanca (1943) (MA/4K) $6.25
Casper (1995) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3.75
Catch the Bullet (2021) (Vudu/HD) $4.75
Change-Up, The (2011) (Unrated) (2011) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $5.50
Chappie (2015) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75
Charlie's Angels (2000) (MA/4K) $7.75
Charlie's Angels (2019) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Chronicles of Riddick (Unrated Director's Cut) (2004) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5
Cinderella (1950) (MA/HD) $5.75 (GP/HD) $3.75
Cinderella (2015) (MA/4K) $7.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $2.50
Cinderella 'Camila Cabello' (2021) (MA/HD) $4.50
Cinderella II: Dreams Come True (2002) (MA/HD) $6.50
Citizenfour (2014) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Clerks III (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.50
Clifford the Big Red Dog (2021) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.50
Clueless (1995) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.25
Coal Miner's Daughter (1980) (MA/HD) $6.25
Coco (2017) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $5.25 (GP/HD) $2.25
Colombiana (Unrated) (2011) (MA/HD) $4.25
Concussion (2015) (MA/HD) $3
Constantine: The House of Mystery (2022) (MA/HD) $3.50
Contraband (2012) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $2
Contractor (2022) (Vudu/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Counselor, The (2013) (MA/HD) $3
Creed Collection 1-3 (Vudu/HD) $12
Creed III (2023) (Vudu/4K) $9
Croods (2013) & A New Age (2020) (MA/HD) $6.75
Croods (2013) (MA/HD) $3.50
Croods: A New Age (2020) (MA/HD) $5
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2001) (MA/4K) $7.75
Cruella (2021) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $3.50 (GP/HD) $2.50
Cult of Chucky (Unrated) (2017) (MA/HD) $3.75 (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Daddy's Home 1-2 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Daddy's Home 2 (2017) (Vudu/4K) $4.50 (iTunes/4K) $2 (Vudu/HD) $2.25
Daniel Craig Collection 5-Movie (Vudu/4K) $20
Darkest Minds, The (2018) (MA/HD) $4.75
DC League of Super-Pets (2022) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $5
Dead Man Down (2013) (MA/HD) $4.75
Deadpool (2016) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2
Deadpool 2 (2018) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $3.25
Dear Evan Hansen (2021) (MA/HD) $4.25
Death on the Nile (2022) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3.50
Death Wish (2018) (Vudu/HD) $2.25
Dentist Collection 1-2 (1996-1998) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Descent, The (2005) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Detective Knight Collection 1-3 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $15 $5.75 Each
Detroit (2017) (iTunes/4K) Ports to MA $4.75
Devil Wears Prada (2006) (MA/HD) $5.75
Devil's Due (2014) (MA/HD) $2.75
Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul (2017) (MA/HD) $2
Die Hard (1988) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $4
Die Hard 1-5 (MA/HD) $16 $4.75 Each
Disaster Artist, The (2017) (Vudu/HD) $6.25
Disneynature Born in China (2017) (MA/HD) $5.25
DisneyNature: Bears (2014) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
District 9 (2009) (MA/4K) $6.50
Do the Right Thing (1989) (MA/4K) $6
Doctor Strange (2016) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $4 (MA/HD) $3.50 (GP/HD) $1.75
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $2.75 (GP/HD) $2
Dog (2022) (Vudu/HD) $3
Dolittle (2020) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3.50
Don't Breathe 2 (2021) (MA/HD) $7.50
Don't Let Go (2019) (MA/HD) $4
Don't Worry Darling (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50
Downton Abbey: A New Era (2022) (MA/HD) $3.75
Dr. Seuss' Horton Hears a Who (2008) (MA/HD) $6.50
Dr. Seuss' The Lorax (2012) (MA/HD) $3.25 (iTunes/HD) $2.25
Dracula Untold (2014) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/4K) $4
Dragonheart 5-Movie (MA/HD) $15
Dredd (2012) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3.50
Drive (2011) (MA/HD) $4.50
Duff, The (2015) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Dumbo (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $5.25 (GP/HD) $2.50
Dune (2021) (MA/4K) $5.50
Dunkirk (2017) (MA/4K) $6.50
E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $3
Early Man (2018) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.25
Echo Boomers (2020) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4
Eddie the Eagle (2016) (MA/HD) (iTunes/4K) $6
Elvis (2022) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4
Elysium (2013) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.25
Empire State (2013) (Vudu/HD) $4.75
Encanto (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) (GP/4K) $3.50
Equalizer (2014) (MA/HD) $3.75
Equalizer 2 (2018) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $2.75
Escape Plan: The Extractors (2019) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Eternals (2021) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3
Everest (2015) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3 (iTunes/4K) $4
Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022) (Vudu/4K) $7.50
Expendables 1-3 (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Extreme Prejudice (1987) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
F9: The Fast Saga + Director's Cut (2021) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $3.25
Fabelmans (2022) (MA/HD) $6.50
Faculty, The (1998) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $6.50
Fantastic Beasts Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $7.75
Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore (2022) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $3
Fantasy Island (2020) (MA/HD) $7
Fast & Furious Collection 1-9 (MA/HD) $10
Father Stu (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50
Ferdinand (2017) (MA/HD) $3.50
Field of Dreams (1989) (MA/4K) $7.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $6
Fifth Element (1997) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $6
Fifty Shades of Black (2016) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3.50
Fifty Shades of Grey 3-Movie + Unrated (MA/HD) $9.75
Finding Dory (2016) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.50 (GP/HD) $1.25
Finding Nemo (2003) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $5.25 (GP/HD) $3
First Man (2018) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4.25
First Purge (2018) (MA/HD) $4.50
Five Feet Apart (2019) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $3
Forbidden Kingdom (2008) (Vudu/HD) $5
Ford v Ferrari (2019) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $4.75
Founder, The (2017) (Vudu/HD) $5 (iTunes/HD) $5.50
Fox and the Hound 2, The (2006) (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $3
Foxcatcher (2014) (MA/HD) $4.50
Frank & Lola (2016) (MA/HD) $4.75
Frankenstein (1931) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Free Guy (2021) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $3.25
Frozen (2013) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $3.50 (GP/HD) $1.50
Frozen 2 (2019) (MA/4K) $4.50 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $1.75
Frozen Sing-Along Edition (2014) (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $1.75
Full Metal Jacket (1987) (MA/4K) $6.50
Fury (2014) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
Future World (2018) (Vudu/HD) $4
Galaxy Quest (1999) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $6
Gambler (2014) (Vudu/HD) $3.50 (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Gangs of New York (2002) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.50
Gate, The (1987) (Vudu/SD) $4.25
Get on Up (2014) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4.50
Get Out (2017) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3.75
Ghost In The Shell (2017) (Vudu/HD) $2.25 (iTunes/4K) $2.75
Ghostbusters (1984) (MA/HD) $3.50
Ghostbusters + Extended (2016) (MA/HD) $3
Ghostbusters II (1989) (MA/HD) $3.50
Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $3.50
Gifted (2017) (MA/HD) $5
Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2011) (MA/HD) $6
Girls Trip (2017) (MA/HD) $1.50 (iTunes/HD) $1
Glass (2019) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
Glory (1989) (MA/4K) $7.75
Godfather (1972) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $4.75
Godfather Trilogy (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $14
Godzilla (1998) (MA/4K) $6.50
Gone Baby Gone (2007) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Good Boys (2019) (MA/HD) $3.75
Good Dinosaur (2015) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $3
Goodbye Christopher Robin (2017) (MA/HD) $6.50
Goosebumps (2015) (MA/HD) $5
Goosebumps 2 (2018) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $6.50
Grease (1978), 2 (1982), Live! (2016) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $14
Great Wall (2016) (MA/HD) $2.50
Green Book (2018) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $5
Green Hornet (2011) (MA/HD) $6.50
Green Lantern: Beware My Power (2022) (MA/HD) $3
Green Mile, The (1999) (MA/4K) $6
Groundhog Day (1993) (MA/4K) $8
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $4.75 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $1.75
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $4.25 (GP/HD) $1.25
Half Brothers (2020) (MA/HD) $5.75
Halloween (2018) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4.25
Halloween Ends (2022) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
Halloween Kills (2021) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $4.25
Hancock (2008) (MA/4K) $6.50
Happy Death Day (2017) (MA/HD) $6
Happy Death Day 2U (2019) (MA/HD) $6
Hate U Give (2018) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $4.50
Hateful Eight (2015) (Vudu/HD) $2
Heat: Director's Definitive Edition (1995) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $5.25
Heavy Metal (1981) (MA/4K) $6.50
Hellboy (Director's Cut) (2004) (MA/4K) $6.50
Hercules (1997) (MA/HD) $6.50 (GP/HD) $5.50
Hidden Figures (2016) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2
Hitman: Agent 47 (2015) (MA/HD) $4.50
Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard (2021) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5
Hobbs & Shaw (2019) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $3.75
Hocus Pocus (1993) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $2.25
Holiday Inn (1942) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3
Home Alone (1990) (MA/HD) $4
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992) (MA/HD) $3.50
Hotel Transylvania (2012) (MA/HD) $6
Hotel Transylvania 2 (2015) (MA/HD) $6.75
Hotel Transylvania 3: Summer Vacation (2018) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4.50
House of 1,000 Corpses (2003), Devil's Rejects (2005), 3 From Hell (2019) (Vudu/HD) $6
House of Gucci (2021) (iTunes/4K) $5
House of the Dragon: Season 1 (2022) (Vudu/4K) $9 (Vudu/HD) $5.50
House with a Clock in Its Walls (2018) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3.75
How to Train Your Dragon (2010) (MA/4K) $6.50
How to Train Your Dragon Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $7.50 $4.75 Each
How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $4.25
Howard the Duck (1986) (MA/4K) $7
Hugo (2011) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
Hulk, The (2003) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $6.25
Hunger Games Collection 1-4 (Vudu/HD) $6 (iTunes/4K) $12
Hunt, The (2019) (MA/HD) $5.75
Huntsman: Winter's War - Extended Edition (2016) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3
I Can Only Imagine (2018) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.75
I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry (2007) (MA/HD) $3.50
Ice Age (2002) (MA/HD) $5
Ice Age: Collision Course (2016) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.25
Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012) (MA/HD) $4.50
Ice Age: The Meltdown (2006) (MA/HD) $6
Identity Thief (2013) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3.75
Ides of March (2011) (MA/HD) $5.25
If Beale Street Could Talk (2018) (MA/HD) $5.75
Impossible, The (2013) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.75
In the Heights (2021) (MA/4K) $5
Incredible Hulk (2008) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $5.25
Incredibles (2004) (MA/4K) $7.75 (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.75
Incredibles 2 (2018) (MA/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2
Independence Day (1996) (MA/4K) $7.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.50
Independence Day: Resurgence (2014) (iTunes/4K) $2 (MA/HD) $1.50
Indiana Jones 1-4 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $20
Inferno (2016) (MA/HD) $3.25
Inglorious Bastards (2009) (MA/4K) $7
Inside Llewyn Davis (2013) (MA/HD) $6
Inside Out (2015) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $4.25 (GP/HD) $1.50
Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013) (MA/HD) $5.25
Insidious: Chapter 3 (2015) (MA/HD) $6.50
Instructions Not Included (2013) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Internship (2013) (MA/HD) $3.25
Interview, The (2014) (MA/HD) $3.50
Into the Woods (2014) (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $2.25
Invisible Man (2020) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75
Iron Man (2008) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $7 (GP/HD) $3
Iron Man 1-3 (MA/4K) $21 (iTunes/4K) $16 (GP/HD) $7.50
Iron Man 2 (2010) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $6.50 (GP/HD) $3
Iron Man 3 (2013) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $3 (MA/HD) $2.25 (GP/HD) $1.50
Isle of Dogs (2018) (MA/HD) $4.75
It Comes at Night (2017) (Vudu/HD) $6.25
It Follows (2015) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Jack Reacher Collection 1-2 (iTunes/4K) $7
Jackass Forever (2022) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4
Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa (2013) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3
Jackie (2016) (MA/HD) $4.25
Jacob's Ladder (1990) (Vudu/HD) $3.50
Jane Got a Gun (2016) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Jason Statham 6-Movie (Wild Card, War, Bank Job, Transporter 3, Crank, Crank 2) (Vudu/HD) $11.50
Jaws (1975) (MA/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75
Jaws (1975) Jaws 2 (1978) Jaws 3 (1983) Jaws: The Revenge (1987) (MA/HD) $15.50
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.50
Jingle All the Way (1996) (MA/HD) $5.25
John Wick Collection 1-3 (Vudu/4K) $16 (iTunes/4K) $14 (Vudu/HD) $8
John Wick: Chapter 4 (2023) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $15
Jojo Rabbit (2019) (MA/HD) $6.75
Joy (2015) (MA/HD) (iTunes/4K) $4
Jumanji (1995) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $6
Jumanji: Next Level (2019) & Welcome to the Jungle (2017) (MA/HD) $7.50
Jumanji: The Next Level (2019) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $5.50
Jumanji: Welcome To The Jungle (2017) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $2 (MA/SD) $1
Jungle Cruise (2021) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $3
Jurassic Park (1993) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $3
Jurassic Park III (2001) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $3.50
Jurassic Park: The Lost World (1997) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $3
Jurassic World (2015) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $2.75
Jurassic World Collection 1-5 (MA/4K) $20 (iTunes/4K) $17.50 (MA/HD) $10
Jurassic World Collection 1-6 (MA/4K) $23.50 (MA/HD) $11.50
Jurassic World: Dominion + Extended Cut (2022) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.25
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (2018) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $1.75
Justice League x RWBY Super Heroes and Huntsmen Part One (2023) (MA/HD) $4
Justice Society: World War II (2021) (MA/4K) $5.50
Katy Perry: Part of Me (2012) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
Kick-Ass 2 (2013) (MA/HD) $5.25 (iTunes/HD) $5
Kicks (2016) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $5
Kid Who Would Be King (2019) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $4.75
Kidnap (2017) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.25
Kill the Messenger (2014) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $5
Killer Elite (2011) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3.25
Killerman (2019) (Vudu/HD) $2.25 (iTunes/HD) $1.75
Killing Lincoln (2013) (MA/HD) $5.25
King Kong (2005) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (MA/HD) $3.50
King of Staten Island (2020) (MA/HD) $4.75
King's Man (2021) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
Kung Fu Panda 3 (2016) (MA/HD) $2.50
Kung Fu Panda Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $12.50
L.A. Confidential (1997) (MA/HD) $5.75
Last Christmas (2019) (MA/HD) $6.50
Last Full Measure (2020) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.50
Last Night in Soho (2021) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $5.75
Last Vegas (2013) (MA/HD) $3
Lawless (2012) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Lee Daniels' The Butler (2013) (Vudu/HD) $2.25
Legion of Super Heroes (2023) (MA/HD) $5.50
Les Miserables (2012) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Let Him Go (2020) (MA/HD) $3.75
Let's Be Cops (2014) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.50
Life (2017) (MA/HD) $2.50
Light of My Life (2019) (Vudu/HD) $2.50 (iTunes/HD) $2
Lightyear (2022) (MA/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $2.75 (GP/HD) $2
Like a Boss (2020) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $2.25
Lion (2016) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Lion King (1994) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2.75
Lion King (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $4 (GP/HD) $1.25
Lion King 1 1/2 (2004) (MA/HD) $6.50
Lion King 2: Simba's Pride (1998) (MA/HD) $6.75 (GP/HD) $5.25
Little Mermaid (1989) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $5.75 (GP/HD) $3.75
Little Monsters (1989) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Live Die Repeat: Edge Of Tomorrow (2014) (MA/4K) $6.50
Lodge, The (2019) (MA/HD) $5.75
Logan Lucky (2017) (MA/HD) $1.50 (iTunes/4K) $2.25
London Has Fallen (2016) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3.75
Lone Survivor (2013) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $2 (MA/HD) $1.50
Long Shot (2019) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4
Longest Ride (2015) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $1.50
Looper (2012) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $3
Lords of Salem, The (2012) (Vudu/HD) $4.75
Lost City, The (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
Love Actually (2003) (MA/HD) $5.50
Love, Simon (2018) (MA/HD) $3
Luca (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $3.25
Lucy (2014) (MA/HD) $2
Lyle, Lyle, Crocodile (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50
Ma (2019) (MA/HD) $5.25
Mad Max Collection 1-4 (Vudu/4K) $20
Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted (2012) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2
Madagascar Collection 1-4 (MA/HD) $14
Maleficent (2014) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3 (GP/HD) $1.25
Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (GP/HD) $1.75
Mama (2013) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $3.50
Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again (2018) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $1.75
Mamma Mia! The Movie (2008) & Here We Go Again (2018) (MA/HD) $6.50 $4.50 Each
Martian - Extended Cut (2015) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $5.25
Martian (Theatrical) (2015) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $3.25
Mary Poppins (1964) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3
Mary Poppins Returns (2018) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2
Matrix Collection 1-4 (MA/4K) $18.50
Matrix: Resurrections (2021) (MA/4K) $5
Maze Runner: The Death Cure (2018) (MA/HD) $5.75
McFarland, USA (2015) (MA/HD) $6.25 (GP/HD) $4.50
Memory (2022) (MA/HD) $3.50
Men (2022) (Vudu/HD) $3.75
Men in Black Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $15.50
Menu (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $4
MIB: International (2019) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $4.75
Mickey & Minnie 10 Classic Shorts - Volume 1 (2023) (MA/HD) $5.75 (GP/HD) $4
Midsommar (2019) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates (2016) (MA/HD) (iTunes/4K) $4.50
Million Dollar Arm (2014) (MA/HD) $4
Minions (2015) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.75
Minions: The Rise of Gru (2022) & Minions (2015) (MA/HD) $8
Minions: The Rise of Gru (2022) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $5.25
Miracles From Heaven (2016) (MA/HD) $4.50
Mission: Impossible Collection 1-6 (Vudu/4K) $25 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $20
Mitchells Vs. The Machines (2021) (MA/HD) $4.50
Moana (2016) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $2
Money Monster (2016) (MA/HD) $3.25
Monster Hunter (2020) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $4.25
Monster Trucks (2016) (Vudu/HD) $2.25
Monster's Ball (2001) (Vudu/HD) $6.25
Monsters University (2013) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $5.75 (GP/HD) $3.50
Monty Python's The Meaning of Life (1983) (MA/4K) $7.25
Monuments Men (2014) (MA/HD) $2
Moonfall (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5
Morbius (2022) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $3.25 (MA/SD) $2.25
Mortal Engines (2018) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $3.25
Mortal Kombat Legends: Snow Blind (2022) (MA/HD) $5.50
Mother! (2017) (Vudu/HD) $3.50
Mountain Between Us (2017) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $1.50
Mr Popper's Penguins (2011) (MA/HD) $6
Much Ado About Nothing (2013) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Mulan (1998) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) $5.75 (GP/HD) $3
Mulan (2020) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $2.25
Muppet Movie (1979) (MA/HD) $7.50 (GP/HD) $6
My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 (2016) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4
My Dinner with Herve (2018) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3
National Lampoon's Animal House (1978) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $5.25
Natural, The (1984) (MA/4K) $5
Nebraska (2013) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.25
Neighbors (2014) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $2
New Mutants (2020) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $2.75
News of the World (2020) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $3.75
Night at the Museum 3-Movie (MA/HD) $13.50 $6 Each (MA/SD) $9
Night Before (2015) (MA/HD) $4.75
Night House, The (2021) (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3
Night School (Extended) (2018) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $3.75
Ninth Gate, The (1999) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
No Country For Old Men (2007) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
No Time to Die (2021) (iTunes/4K) $3.50
Nobody (2021) (MA/HD) $5.25
Non-Stop (2014) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Nope (2022) (MA/HD) $5.75
Nope (2022), Get Out (2017) & Us (2019) (MA/HD) $10
Norm of the North (2016) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Northman (2022) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $4.50
Nutcracker and the Four Realms (2018) (MA/4K) $6 (MA/HD) $3 (GP/HD) $2.50
Oblivion (2013) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $3.50 (MA/HD) $2.25
Olaf's Frozen Adventure Plus 6 Disney Tales (2017) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3
Olympus Has Fallen (2013) (MA/HD) $5
On the Basis of Sex (2019) (MA/HD) $4.50
Once Upon A Time... In Hollywood (2019) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $5
Onward (2020) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $2.25
Oranges, The (2011) (MA/HD) $4.50
Other Woman (2014) (MA/HD) $2.25
Ouija (2014) & Origin of Evil (2016) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $9
Overboard (2016) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5.75
Pacific Rim Uprising (2018) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $4.50
Pain & Gain (2013) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3.25
Paper Towns (2011) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.50
ParaNorman (2012) (iTunes/HD) $5
Passengers (2016) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $2.75
Passion of the Christ (2004) (MA/HD) $10
Paul (2011) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4.50
Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 (2015) (MA/HD) $4.25
Paw Patrol: The Movie (2021) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5
Paws of Fury: The Legend of Hank (2022) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $6
Pearl (2022) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Peppermint (2018) (iTunes/HD) $1.75
Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters (2013) (MA/HD) $2.25
Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $1.75
Peter Rabbit (2018) & 2 (2021) (MA/HD) $8.50 $4.75 Each
Peter Rabbit (2018) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $4.75
Phantom Thread (2017) (MA/HD) $3.75
Philadelphia (1993) (MA/4K) $7.75
Philomena (2013) (Vudu/HD) $2
Pinocchio (1940) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $3.75
Pirate Fairy (2014) (MA/HD) $3.25
Pitch Perfect (2012) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.75
Pitch Perfect Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $11.50
Pixels (2015) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Planes, Trains and Automobiles (1987) (iTunes/HD) $3.75
Planes: Fire & Rescue (2014) (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $2
Planet of the Apes 1-3 (Newer) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $12
Playing with Fire (2019) (iTunes/4K) $1.50 (Vudu/HD) $2
Pocahontas (1995) (MA/HD) $6.50 (GP/HD) $5
Pompeii (2014) (MA/HD) $3.50
Poms (2019) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Post, The (2017) (MA/HD) $2.75
Predator (1987), 2 (1990), Predators (2009), Predator (2018) (MA/HD) $11
Predator (2018) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $3.50
Premium Rush (2012) (MA/HD) $3.25
Prey for the Devil (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
Princess and the Frog (2009) (iTunes/4K) $5.50 (GP/HD) $3.25
Prometheus (2012) (MA/HD) $1.75
Prophecy Collection 1-5 (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $14.50
Psycho (1960) (MA/HD) (iTunes/4K) $5
Psycho (1960), Rear Window (1954), The Birds (1963), Vertigo (1958) (MA/4K) $17
Public Enemies (2009) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $6.25
Purge, The (2013) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3
Purge: Anarchy (2014) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75
Purge: Election Year (2016) (MA/4K $5.50 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3
Puss in Boots (2011) (MA/4K) $6.75
Puss in Boots: The Last Wish (2022) (MA/HD) $7.50
Queen & Slim (2019) (MA/HD) $4.50
R.I.P.D. (2013) (MA/HD) $3.25 (iTunes/HD) $3
Race (2016) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $2.75
Ralph Breaks the Internet (2018) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) $4.50 (GP/HD) $1.50
Rambo Collection 1-5 (Vudu/HD) $14
Rambo: First Blood (1982) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6
Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985) (Vudu/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Raya and the Last Dragon (2021) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2.50
Rescuers Down Under (1990) (MA/HD) $6.50 (GP/HD) $4
Resident Evil: Retribution (2012) (MA/HD) $2.25
Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (2017) (MA/4K) $7.25 (MA/HD) $3.25
Resident Evil: Welcome to Raccoon City (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $4.50
Respect (2021) (iTunes/4K) $4.75
Revenant, The (2015) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $3.25
Ricki And The Flash (2015) (MA/HD) $4.50
Riddick - Unrated Director's Cut (2013) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4
Riddick Collection 1-3 (Unrated) (MA/HD) $14
Ride Along 1-2 (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5 $2.75 Each
Rio 2 (2014) (MA/HD) $2.25
Risen (2016) (MA/HD) $4.50
Road to El Dorado (2000) (MA/HD) $5.50
Robin Hood (2010) (MA/4K) $6.25
Robin Hood (Animated) (1973) (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $2.75
RoboCop (1987) (Vudu/HD) $7.25
Robots (2005) (MA/HD) $6.75
Rock Dog (2016) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Ron's Gone Wrong (2021) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $5.25 (GP/HD) $3.50
Rumble (2022) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Run Lola Run (1998) (MA/HD) $6.50
Rush (2013) (MA/HD) $2.75 (iTunes/HD) $3.25
Russell Madness (2015) (MA/HD) $4
Safe (2012) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $1.75
Saint Maud (2020) (Vudu/HD) $6
Santa Clause (1994), 2 (2002), 3 (2006) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $10.50 (GP/HD) $6.50
Saving Mr. Banks (2013) (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $2.75
Saw Collection 1-7 (Vudu/HD) $10
Scott Pilgrim vs. The World (2010) (MA/4K) (iTunes/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $5.25
Scream 5 (2022) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.50
Scream Collection 1-3 (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $13.50
Second Act (2018) (iTunes/HD) $1.50
Secret Garden, The (2020) (iTunes/4K) $4.25
Secret Headquarters (2022) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $6
Secret Life of Pets 1-2 (MA/HD) $7.50
Secret Life of Pets 2 (2019) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $5
Seeking a Friend for the End of the World (2012) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4.50
Seriously Red (2022) (Vudu/HD) $6.75
Sessions, The (2012) (MA/HD) $4.50
Sex Tape (2014) (MA/HD) $3
Shallows, The (2016) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD $4
Shang-Chi (2021) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4.75 (GP/HD) $3
Shaun of the Dead (2004) (MA/4K) $4
Shaun of the Dead (2004), Hot Fuzz (2007), World's End (2013) (MA/HD) $10
Shaun the Sheep Movie (2015) (Vudu/HD) $4
Shawshank Redemption (1994) (MA/4K) $6
Shazam! Fury of the Gods (2023) & Shazam! (2019) (MA/HD) $10.50
Shazam! Fury of the Gods (2023) (MA/4K) $9 (MA/HD) $8
She's Having a Baby (1988) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Shooter (2007) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Sicario: Day of the Soldado (2018) (MA/4K) $7.75 (MA/HD) $3.75
Sideways (2004) (MA/HD) $5.25
Silent Night, Deadly Night: 3-Film Collection (1989-1991) (Vudu/HD) $6
Silver Linings Playbook (2012) (Vudu/HD) $2
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (2014) (Vudu/HD) $6.25
Sing 2 (2021) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.50
Sing Collection 1-2 (MA/HD) $6
Singin' in the Rain (1952) (MA/4K) $6.50
Sinister (2012) (Vudu/HD) $3 (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Sisters (Unrated) (2015) (MA/HD) $4 (iTunes/HD) $3.25
Sixteen Candles (1984) (MA/HD) $5.25 (iTunes/HD) $4.25
Skeleton Twins (2014) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Skyscraper (2018) (MA/4K) $5.25 (MA/HD) $1.75
Sleepless (2017) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $1
Smile (2022) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/4K) $6.75
Smokey and the Bandit (1977) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $3.75
Smurfs 2 (2013) (MA/HD) $3.25
Smurfs: The Lost Village (2017) (MA/HD) $3.25
Snake Eyes (2021) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.25
Snatched (2017) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $1
Snitch (2013) (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $1.75
Snow White and the Huntsman (Extended) (2012) (iTunes/4K) $3.50 (MA/HD) $2.50
Son of God (2014) (MA/HD) $1.25
Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (2022) (Vudu/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Soul (2020) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $3.75 (GP/HD) $2.25
Southpaw (2015) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Southside With You (2016) (Vudu/HD) $3.50
Space Between Us, The (2017) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $5
Space Jam (1996) (MA/4K) $5
Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021) (MA/4K) $5
Speed (1994) (MA/4K) $5.25
Spider-Man (2002) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Spider-Man 2 (2004) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Spider-Man 3 (2007) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Spider-Man Collection 1-8 (MA/HD) $26
Spider-Man: Far From Home (2019) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $4
Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $1.75
Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $3.75
Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron (2003) (MA/HD) $5
Split (2017) (MA/4K) $6.75 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.75
Spy (Unrated) (2015) (MA/HD) $2
Spy Game (2001) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $5.75
Stand Up Guys (2012) (Vudu/HD) $2.75
Star Trek 1-3 (Vudu/4K) $18 (Vudu/HD) $9.50 (iTunes/4K) $13.50
Star Trek Beyond (2016) (Vudu/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.25
Star Trek Into Darkness (2013) (Vudu/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.25
Starship Troopers (1997) (MA/4K) $6.50
Still Alice (2015) (MA/HD) $3
Stillwater (2021) (MA/HD) $5
Straight Outta Compton (Unrated Director’s Cut) (2015) (MA/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Strange World (2022) (GP/HD) Ports to MA $4.25
Strangers: Prey at Night (2018) (MA/HD) $3.50
Stronger (2017) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Stuber (2019) (MA/HD) $4.75
Studio 666 (2022) (MA/HD) $6.75
Suicide Squad, The (2021) (MA/4K) $5
Super Troopers (2002) (MA/HD) $5.75
SW: A New Hope (1977) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $6.25 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Empire Strikes Back (1980) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $6.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Force Awakens (2015) (MA/4K) $5.25 (iTunes/4K) $3.50 (GP/HD) $1
SW: Last Jedi (2017) (MA/4K) $5.75 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (GP/HD) $1
SW: Phantom Menace (1999) (MA/4K) $7.50 (iTunes/4K) $6.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Return of the Jedi (1983) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $6.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Revenge of the Sith (2005) (MA/4K) $7.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
SW: Rise of Skywalker (2019) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) $4.75 (GP/HD) $2.25
SW: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016) (MA/4K) $6.50 (iTunes/4K) $3.75 (GP/HD) $1.25
SW: Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $5 (GP/HD) $3.50
Sword in the Stone (1963) (MA/HD) $6.25 (GP/HD) $3.75
Taken Collection 1-3 (MA/HD) $9
Tangled (2010) (MA/4K) $8 (MA/HD) $5 (GP/HD) $3.75
Tarzan (1999) (MA/HD) $6.50 (GP/HD) $5
Teen Titans Go! & DC Super Hero Girls: Mayhem in the Multiverse (2022) (MA/HD) $4.75
Terminator (1984) (Vudu/HD) $7
Terminator: Genisys (2015) (Vudu/HD) $1.75 (iTunes/4K) $3
Theory Of Everything (2014) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4
Think Like a Man (2012) & Two (2014) (MA/HD) $9
This Is 40 (2012) (MA/HD) $3.75 (iTunes/HD) $2.50
Thor (2011) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $7 (GP/HD) $3.50
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $3.25 (GP/HD) $2
Thor: The Dark World (2013) (MA/4K) $7 (iTunes/4K) $4.50 (GP/HD) $2.25
Till (2022) (iTunes/4K) $6.50
Tinker Bell and the Legend of the NeverBeast (2014) (MA/HD) $6 (GP/HD) $4
Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy (2011) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $4.50
Titanic (1997) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4.75
TMNT Out of the Shadows (2016) (iTunes/4K) $4
To Kill a Mockingbird (1962) (MA/4K) $6.25 (iTunes/HD) $4.50
Tomorrowland (2015) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $3.50
Top Gun: Maverick (2022) (Vudu/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (Vudu/HD) $5.75
Total Recall + Extended (2012) (MA/HD) $5 (Theatrical) $4
Toy Story 1-4 (MA/4K) $23 (iTunes/4K) $21 (GP/HD) $11.50
Toy Story of Terror! (2013) (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3
Trading Places (1983) (Vudu/HD) $4.50
Training Day (2001) (MA/4K) $6.50
Trainwreck (2015) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $1.50
Transformers 1-5 (Vudu/4K) $30 (Vudu/HD) $23
Trauma Center (2019) (iTunes/4K) $3.25
Triple 9 (2016) (iTunes/HD) Ports to MA $2.50
Trolls (2016) (MA/HD) $1.25
Trolls Collection 1-2 (MA/HD) $6
Tully (2018) (MA/HD) $5.75
Turning Red (2022) (MA/4K) $6.25 (MA/HD) $4 (GP/HD) $2.75
Umma (2022) (MA/HD) $4.75
Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent (2022) (Vudu/4K) (iTunes/4K) $6.75
Unbreakable (2000) (MA/4K) $6 (GP/HD) $3.75
Unbroken (2014) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $3
Uncharted (2022) (MA/4K) $5.50 (MA/HD) $3.25
Under the Skin (2014) (Vudu/HD) $5.25
Underworld: Blood Wars (2016) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) $2.25
Unforgiven (1992) (MA/4K) $6.50
Unhinged (2020) (Vudu/HD) $4.75
Up (2009) (iTunes/4K) $7.50 (MA/HD) $6.75
Up in Smoke ‘Cheech and Chong’ (1978) (Vudu/HD) $3.50 (iTunes/HD) $2.75
Upside, The (2017) (iTunes/HD) $2
Us (2019) (MA/HD) $5.25
Van Helsing (2004) (MA/4K) $6 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $4.75
Venom (2018) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $3.25
Venom: Let There Be Carnage (2021) (MA/4K) $7 (MA/HD) $3.50
Vice (2015) 'Bruce Willis' (Vudu/HD) $2.50
WALL-E (2008) (iTunes/4K) $8 (GP/HD) $5.50
Walt Disney Animation Studios Shorts Collection (2015) (MA/HD) $5.50 (GP/HD) $4
Warcraft (2016) (MA/4K) $5 (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.25
Watch, The (2012) (MA/HD) $4.25
Waterworld (1995) (MA/4K) $6.75 (MA/HD) $6
Way, Way Back, The (2013) (MA/HD) $5.25
Weird Science (2008) (MA/HD) (iTunes/HD) $6
Welcome to Marwen (2018) (MA/4K) $3.50
West Side Story (2021) (MA/4K) $5.75 (MA/HD) (GP/HD) $2.50
What to Expect When You're Expecting (2012) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $2.25
When the Game Stands Tall (2014) (MA/HD) $4.50 (MA/SD) $1.75
Where the Crawdads Sing (2022) (MA/HD) $4.50
Whiplash (2014) (MA/HD) $5.75
White House Down (2013) (MA/HD) $3.50
Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance With Somebody (2022) (MA/HD) $5.75
Widows (2018) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $1.75
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971) (MA/4K) $5
Wind River (2017) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $5
Wings (1927) (Vudu/HD) (iTunes/HD) $4
Witch, The (2016) (Vudu/HD) $3.50
Wolf Man (1941) (MA/4K) $6.50
Wolverine (Unrated) (2013) (MA/HD) $3.75
Woman King (2022) (MA/4K) $6.50 (MA/HD) $5.50
Wonder Woman 1984 (2020) (MA/4K) $5
Won't Back Down (2012) (MA/HD) $4
Wreck-It Ralph (2012) (MA/4K) $8 (GP/HD) $4.25
X (2022) (Vudu/HD) $6.75
X2: X-Men United (2003) (MA/HD) $6.25
X-Men (2000), X2 (2003), X-Men: The Last Stand (2006) (MA/HD) $15
X-Men: Apocalypse (2016) (iTunes/4K) (MA/HD) $2.50
X-Men: First Class (2010), Days of Future Past (2004), Apocalypse (2014) (MA/HD) $11
Yesterday (2019) (MA/HD) $4.50
Zathura (2005) (MA/HD) $7
Zero Dark Thirty (2012) (MA/HD) $3
Zootopia (2016) (MA/4K) $7.25 (iTunes/4K) $5 (MA/HD) $4.50 (GP/HD) $3.25

I don't even know where to start here so bear with me. I'm trying to figure out if I should or shouldn't do it and how to.
I'm in a long distance relationship and I know that already sounds like recipe for disaster. I've known my boyfriend for 3 years and we started officially dating this year after he came to my country and spent a month here.
When he left, I was okay with the relationship but I felt pressured into making it public. A couple of days after he left, he pushed me into making it official on Facebook. I wasn't comfortable (there were people on my Facebook at the time I didn't want snooping around on that but that's an unrelated event) but did it. Since then, it's like he's a different person. He was clingy and affectionate to the point where I complained to friends that I couldn't do anything around the house and it was annoying me but I grew used to it; now it's been months since he last said an "I love you" or even remotely something affectionate. He also changed his mind on having kids after we made it official (which I always made clear was essential for me) and keeps saying kids are terrible, the worst, etc.
Add to the mountain of tension the fact I feel like he's not prioritizing our future or thinking about it. He worked minimum wage (which, again, it's fine) but refuses to study even though his circumstances fully allow it because, and I quote, he doesn't want to explore the workers and sees any type of degree as a tool for that (I have a bachelors, a specialisation and now I'm applying for my masters). But the straw that broke the camel's back is this:
A couple of days ago we had an argument over something I know it's dumb but it felt disrespectful. I am an odd woman, there's no way to put this with any other words. I am a huge age of sails enthusiast (I sail myself and visit naval museums for fun), read books and diaries of sailmakers and shipmakers and captain's logs, I build ship models, have sea themed tattoos and am absolutely in love with historical reenactment, know the language of fans by heart and even make my own butter. It's recently become a problem in the sense that my boyfriend doesn't care about any of this (which is okay, we're all different people) but also thinks I shouldn't and has grown resentful at my interest.
I shared a historical fact with him (in a very "can you believe this???" way) that ended up with him saying "who cares" and blowing up when I said I did. He got aggressive, said "fuck all of this, I'm going to bed" and hasn't talked to me since. He did go to a friend in common's birthday party and seemed all happy and not at all bothered by the things he said. We haven't talked since.
He does struggle with depression but refuses to get help for it because he thinks life under meds is miserable and fake. I'm just so tired to feel like I'm in a battlefield inside my own relationship. This is not the man I started dating and I don't know how to get out of it, a mix of embarrassed that I have to tell my family about it and a grief because I love his mom and his brother, but my friends think this is not the life I should be having, that if he likes bimbos that's his problem and not mine but I don't know what to do.
How do I approach this? Am I exaggerating in wanting to break up? I just feel so guilty and anxious thinking about it but I also want to feel safe, not like I have to walk on eggshells and feel ashamed for my interests.

Introduction
As a big guy myself, standing at 6’4” with a size 13 shoe, I often wonder about what it would actually take for someone like me to disappear. I’m the type or person who friends use as a marker to find their way through a crowd, and I’m almost instantly recognizable walking down the street.
That being said, there is one place where I could almost certainly disappear without a trace: the wilderness. I think many underestimate just how easy it is to go missing in the wilderness, even a rather small wilderness. A single wrong turn or a mistaken landmark can spell doom for even seasoned woodland travelers.
Honestly, I attribute this underestimation to the popularity of “Missing 411” cases. Many assume that those who went missing in heavily wooded areas or national parks must have disappeared as a result of something supernatural or conspiratorial, simply because they can’t accept just how easily and remorselessly nature can gobble us up.
If I suddenly decided to go missing within society, I think I’d be found in no time. But if I went missing in the wilderness, it’s always possible that I would never be found, even if my body came to rest nearby well-traveled thoroughfares.
I bring all this up because I think much the same for former American professional basketball player Rico Harris, who is even more recognizable than myself. Harris is a Black male, who stands at 6’9” tall, weighs 300 lbs., and has distinctive tattoos, such as one that reads “BALLIN IV LIFE” across his left forearm. If he’s alive, he’s almost certainly worked very hard to keep his presence secret, both from his family and from law enforcement.
Police investigators have suggested that Harris simply walked away from the scene of his disappearance, got in a car, and headed somewhere to start a new life. While there are certainly factors that point to this being a logical possibility, at least in terms of where Harris was in his life mentally and emotionally, I think that the lack of sightings of an individual that matches his description in the almost nine years since he went missing makes it far more likely that Rico Harris’ body is lying somewhere in the wilderness near where he vanished and that it simply hasn’t been located by anyone.
I feel that police assertions that Harris may have simply left the scene to start a new life are wishful thinking, designed to provide the family with false hope and perhaps prevent law enforcement from having to conduct further searches to recover Harris’ remains. Regardless of your opinion on the case, let’s review what we do know so that we can make an educated guess on what we don’t.
Rico Harris’ Life and Struggles
Rico Harris’ life followed a tragic path tread by far too many young, talented athletes. He had the physical talent to play in the NBA but none of the mental or emotional intelligence and maturity to deal with such instant stardom.
Harris seemed to maintain a sort of love/hate relationship with the game of basketball and had actually taken a break from it before returning for his final two years at Temple City High School, where he quickly became a local star, with scouts comparing his play style to that of NBA player Lamar Odom.
Harris was soon recognized as one of the nation’s top 100 prospects and received scholarship offers from such blue-blood basketball programs as Connecticut, Kentucky, and UCLA. Ultimately, however, Harris would commit to Arizona State. He would never play a game there.
He wasn’t eligible to play during his freshman year but stayed on campus, away from family and other positive role models in his life. He struggled academically and socially before being accused of unlawful imprisonment and sexual assault by two young women on campus.
These women stated that Harris and two of his other teammates had prevented them from leaving and forced them to perform sex acts on them. However, after further investigation, police dismissed the charges against Harris and his teammates after noting discrepancies in the girls’ stories. Nonetheless, the Arizona State basketball team had seen and heard enough to sit Harris for his upcoming sophomore season.
Deciding that he needed to pursue his basketball career elsewhere, Harris transferred to Los Angeles Community College where, surrounded by inferior talent, he began to shine once again and again became a star, attracting NBA scouts to games who still saw potential in the young phenom.
After the season, Harris planned to transfer to Rhode Island. However, a failed class prevented his transfer from going through, and he chose to return to LACC for a second season. An offer from Rhode Island remained on the table next year, but Harris shocked everyone by instead transferring to Cal State Northridge, stating to one confidante that he believed that the LACC coach was merely trying to use him to help out his friend, who was the Rhode Island head coach.
Instead, he wanted to remain closer to home and work with a coach he trusted. Harris sadly had a long history of rejecting and mistrusting men who tried to play a fatherly role in his life, likely an issue stemming from his own broken relationship with his father, who could quickly turn from friendly to violent and who his mother eventually moved away from with the children to escape.
Eventually, Harris would also be suspended by Northridge as well, which officially brought about an end to his collegiate career. Harris spoke out about feeling pressured by everyone around him; this pressure led him to increasingly turn to drugs and alcohol, which likely further hampered his performance on the court.
In the 1999 NBA Draft, no team decided to take a risk on Harris, leaving him to go to the now defunct International Basketball League. In 2000, Harris joined the Harlem Globetrotters, and it felt like his big break. Their fun-loving antics seemed like a great fit for his skills and talents.
Unfortunately, only about a month after joining the Globetrotters, Harris was driving with his girlfriend in South Los Angeles, when he got into a dispute with several individuals. He got out of the car to confront them when someone cracked him in the back of the head with a baseball bat.
Though Harris recovered from the wound, his balance never fully returned, and he continued to suffer from frequent intense headaches. Harris’ basketball career was, sadly, over.
Harris Spirals, Then Seemingly Recovers
Harris felt completely rudderless. He did not know what to do with his life now that his basketball career was over. His alcohol addiction worsened, and he began to develop dependencies on heroin, methamphetamine, and crack.
Harris was arrested over one hundred times, most often for public intoxication, and he was clearly struggling. His lowest moment came in 2007, when he overdosed on prescription medication and nearly died.
After a lengthy rehabilitation period with the Salvation Army in downtown Los Angeles. Afterwards, he began working in security, a role that he seemed ideally suited for and seemed to enjoy well enough.
In 2012, he began dating Jennifer Song, an insurance broker from Seattle that he met while working a security detail. In September 2014, Harris abandoned his apartment in Los Angeles, intending to move in with Song full-time up in Seattle.
Though Song reported that they had a good relationship, many of Harris’ friends and relatives saw quite a bit of tension in their relationship leading up to Harris’ disappearance. Based on Harris’ history, it seems likely that some of this tension was connected to his living away from home, which had always caused problems in the past.
But despite this perceived tension, Harris seemed to have truly turned his life around, with his addictions in the rearview mirror, when he suddenly went missing on October 10, 2014.
Rico Harris Vanishes
On October 9, 2014, Harris visited his family home with the goal of completing his move in with Song. His visit was brief. He apparently purchased a new phone for his younger brother, which shows that his financial struggles likely were not at the forefront of his mind.
He also spoke with his mother. Song told police that she thought Harris was seeking closure related to some difficult childhood events. His mother later stated that she did not feel that he got what he was looking for.
Harris’ close friend David Lara had spoken to Harris on his trip down to Southern California and reported that Harris seemed optimistic and was looking forward to marrying and starting a family with Song. Little is known, however, about Harris’ mood after visiting with his family.
Harris began his drive back up to Seattle, heading north on Interstate 5, stopping for gas in Lodi before continuing up north of Sacramento. There, about 10:45 am on the morning of October 10, Harris decided to get some rest, convinced by Song’s urging since had now been awake for 36 straight hours. He left Song a voice message, telling her that he was going “up into the mountains to rest.”
I’ve always found this phrasing particularly odd. I’ve heard people say they’re figuratively going “into the mountains” to find a place to pull over or find a motel, but the full “up into the mountains” has always struck me as being very literal, and perhaps a sign that Harris was already suffering through a bit of a mental breakdown before officially stopping for the day.
Regardless of intention, at 11:15 am, Harris turned off his phone. He has not been officially seen, heard from, or positively identified since.
The Search for Rico Harris
Friends and family initially assumed that Harris would just turn up. It wasn’t unusual for him to disappear for a couple days at a time. However, by October 14th, after missing an interview he had been excited for in Seattle, Harris was finally reported missing.
Later that day, Yolo County police located Harris’ vehicle, seemingly abandoned in a county park parking lot near Cache Creek. The inside of the car was a mess. It was also out of fuel and had a dead battery.
A mile south of Harris’ car they found his backpack. Inside was his cell phone, which was dead but otherwise seemed fine.
There were also two plastic bottles, one filled with a solution that seemed to be hard liquor mixed with an energy drink. The other was empty but smelled strongly of liquor. Sources seem to disagree on whether the bottles were found in his car or his backpack. Regardless of where they were found, it is clear that Harris had either relapsed or had been successfully hiding his addiction as of late.
Police combed Cache Creek Canyon without success. They used infrared imaging from planes, perused the area on foot and on ATVs, and brought out tracking and cadaver dogs. There was no sign of Harris, and nobody could imagine how such a large man had simply vanished.
Several sightings were reported of a man who matched Harris’ description, and to be quite frank, I can’t imagine there were that many men who could be mistaken for Harris in the area at that time. He was spotted walking along the side of the road and sitting on a guardrail, looking at the creek. These sightings took place on October 10 and 11, shortly after Harris’ last known contact with family and friends.
Police found selfies on Harris’ phone showing him posing joyfully beside a sign welcoming him to Yolo County; perhaps he was amused by the name, with YOLO being common parlance (particularly at the time he went missing) for “You only live once.”
There was also an apparently accidental video that showed Harris rifling through his glove box, singing along to his music and seemingly in good spirits despite his somewhat erratic behavior.
Had Harris’ story ended here, it would have still been compelling, but it went further. On October 18, a truck driver reported seeing a man who matched Harris’ description walking near the parking lot where his Nissan had been left.
Imprints were later found in the parking lot that were not defined enough to have a cast made. However, they were apparently not consistent with animal prints and were large enough that they could very well have come from a size 18 shoe. As someone who wears a size 13, I can tell you that that’s a huge footprint and not something that could be left by just anyone. The shoeprints were allegedly leading away from the parking lot.
No legitimate sightings of Harris have been reported since.
Analysis of Harris’ Disappearance
Let’s begin by looking at the official police narrative of Rico Harris’ disappearance. Law enforcement has asserted that there is no evidence of foul play in Harris’ disappearance. I tend to agree with this assessment. By all accounts, Harris came to Yolo County alone, and there were no signs of a struggle surrounding his disappearance.
Furthermore, if you find the eyewitness testimony of those who allegedly saw him reliable, as I do given his unique stature, he was never spotted with anyone else.
Where I differ from law enforcement is in my belief about what happened to Rico Harris and his intent throughout the whole process. Police believe that Harris only arrived in Yolo County by accident, that he took a wrong turn and ended up out there.
I’m not sure he did. He told Song that he planned to go “up into the mountains.” Perhaps this is what he meant; perhaps something within him led him to stray from his established path, perhaps because he was having a mental breakdown or for spiritual reasons or simply because he felt like he needed a place off the beaten path to rest.
I think it’s possible that he took a wrong turn and got lost, but neither his selfies nor his communications with Song (where he mentioned nothing about being lost) nor his actions thereafter really suggest this.
Next up, police don’t seem to have any kind of theory, at least publicly, as to what happened in the days between Harris’ initial disappearance and his return to the parking lot on October 18th. I doubt he was in town anywhere nearby, since local law enforcement was actively working to ensure that locals knew they were looking for Harris. Despite this, there are no reports of him in town, despite his size which would have immediately set him apart.
I theorize that Harris was likely out in the woods during this time. If he had relapsed on alcohol, it is not beyond reason that he may have had access to other drugs as well. Perhaps Harris turned this incident into an unexpected retreat. Detectives say that Harris looked like “a free man” in the videos found of him. Perhaps this inspired him to go into nature, even with or without the influence of drugs and alcohol.
So why did Harris not return for eight full days? Maybe this is when he ran out of drugs. Maybe he had become lost and only found his way back by that point. Perhaps he had finally had a reality check and decided that it was time to return to his life.
Regardless, I do believe that Harris returned to the parking lot. The shoeprints along with the sighting are enough to make me feel that this was legitimate. After this, police suggest that Harris either went into the woods or into town. One detective goes so far as to suggest that, “We have no sightings, so he probably got a ride.”
This is where I strongly disagree with law enforcement. I don’t think that Rico Harris left to start another life. He seemed to struggle mightily with being far from home and family, and I can’t imagine he would run away, then spend almost nine years without so much as briefly contacting a family member or friend.
And to return to the subject at the beginning of this piece, I don’t mean to suggest that it would be completely impossible for Harris to vanish into a new life, but his physical circumstances would make that especially difficult. I think that it would take a whole lot of work for Harris to disappear into another life fully, and I just don’t think the evidence points to him either being at that point or being willing to commit himself to so difficult a project.
Personally, I find it far more likely that Harris wandered back into the woods, dejected to find his car missing, and either committed suicide or accidentally died, having seen his missing vehicle as the final proof that he wasn’t meant to return to ordinary life.
Looking at photographs of Cache Creek Canyon, I’m honestly surprised this is not brought up more often. Police often speak as if Harris went missing in a small city park and that they’d certainly find him if he was there.
I’m just not so sure. Cache Creek Canyon looks like it contains plenty of dense foliage. I feel like a body, even one the size of Rico Harris’s, could easily evade detection, particularly if located far from the main trails.
Conclusion
Unlike many cases I cover on here, where the victim has been missing for far too long to realistically still be alive, Rico Harris has been missing for less than a decade. If he did indeed run away, as the police seem ready to accept, he could very well be alive.
If you know a 6’9”, 300 lbs. Black man with a “BALLIN IV LIFE” tattoo and a mysterious past, please consider contacting Yolo County law enforcement. Heck, if you are Rico, consider contacting them yourself. I don’t know anything about the demons of your past, but I do know that there are people who love you and who deserve to know that you’re okay.
However, I find it far more likely that Rico is still out there somewhere near Cache Creek Canyon, his tale sadly having come to an end in a corner of the park that nobody’s checked yet. Maybe he’ll stay there forever, unfound and unburied.
This is truly a case where I just don’t know what to think. I don’t understand why law enforcement’s active theory, or at least publicly promoted theory, is that he hitched a ride and drove away. It just doesn’t add up to me, and I can’t help but wonder if they have additional reasons for thinking this that they haven’t shared with the public.
Nonetheless, I hope we can find Harris one way or another, so that his family have can closure if nothing else. These days, they sit around wondering what happened to him, and wondering if one word, one phrase, one answer could have changed things entirely.
Sources
https://www.latimes.com/sports/sportsnow/la-sp-missing-basketball-player-20190316-story.html
https://www.vizaca.com/rico-harris-missing/
https://allthatsinteresting.com/rico-harris
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rico\_Harris

Venue: XL Center (Hartford, CT)
Attendance: ~8900

Winner	Loser	Match Finish	Stipulation
Becky Lynch	Sonya Deville w/ Chelsea Green	Man-Handle Slam	MitB Qualifying Match
GUNTHER w/ Imperium	Kevin Owens w/ Sami Zayn	Roll-Up following Imperium brawl with Sami
Ronda Rousey and Shayna Bazler	Kayden Carter and Katana Chance	Kirafuda Clutch
Ricochet	Shinsuke Nakamura	Double DQ when Bronson Reed attacks both men
Zoey Stark w/ Trish Stratus	Natalya	Z-360
Indus Sher w/ Jinder Mahal	Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander	Referee Stoppage
Seth Rollins (c)	Damian Priest	Curbstomp	For the World Heavyweight Championship

IMPORTANT NOTES

• Kick-Off with Seth Rollins making his way to the ring and welcoming us to Monday Night Rollins and says the last week has been a non-stop par-tay before thinking to himself when was the last time they had a World Title match on Raw. He had to go all the way back to two years ago and says that is too damn long so he put out for the call for an open challenge which was answered by the Judgement Day's Damian Priest. Seth admits he's kinda excited for it since he wanted to fight the best, and love them or hate them, The Judgement Day are as as good as it gets and he's looking forward to showing them that as good as they are they just ain't him. The Judgement Day come out to interrupt with Finn and Damian walking down the ramp and Seth wants to know where Rhea and Dom are out wondering if they're gonna jump him from behind or making out somewhere. Priest says Dom and Rhea has their own business to take care of and Seth says he's sure they do before asking why Finn and Priest have to go everywhere and ask if they even gotta hold on together when they go to the bathroom. Finn calls him funny but says no one is gonna be laughing when Priest beats him for the title tonight. Damian admits that he thinks Seth is a deserving champion and he's beaten everyone he's been in the ring with, but so has he. Damian says he never knew when this opportunity was going to happen so he is taking full advantage and he doesn't need Finn, Dom, or Rhea to take care of Rollins. Seth tells Priest if he's so confident then why doesn't he put his money where his mouth with and leave his crew in the back and suggests it may be better if he leaves Finn in the back since he usually can't handle a fight with him. Finn tells Seth that he doesn't dictate how they roll but Priest interrupts to say he's fine with the stipulation because either way he's leaving tonight as World Heavyweight Champion and put a short end to Seth's title reign. Seth says he's looking forward to it, and even if the reign ended tonight it'd still be much longer than Finn's was.
  
• Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn are interviewed backstage about what happened on Smackdown. Sami says he isn't the one to say he told you so but he's glad to say the Usos do what they should have done months ago, well at least Jimmy was able to but hopes Jey follows suit. They are interupted by Kaiser and Vinci, Ludwig says that the Bloodline is no longer their problem, Imperium is. Kevin goes on a rant saying that they told them already last week to not appear when they aren't asked. GUNTHER appears and tells Owens he needs to control his temper. Owens says he'll show him how much he can control it and challenges him to a match right now and storms to the ring.
  
• Backstage Matt Riddle says he's tired of seeing GUNTHER cheat week after week and says if it wasn't for Kaiser and Giovanni he would have lost the Intercontinental Championship long ago. Kaiser and Vinci come by and demand to know how dare he degrade GUNTHER's good name and asks Riddle what he's going to do about it before shoving Riddle. Riddle grabs Vinci and flips him over the crates before grabbing Vinci's leg and locking him in an ankle lock until officials come by to pull him off.
  
• Backstage Shayna Bazler says they manifested this a decade ago when they were still in the octagon and Ronda says they are finally going to legitimize the titles and want to see anyone try and challenge them. Katana Chance and Kayden Carter approach them and say they're up for a fight but Ronda and Shayna both dismiss them and attempt to intimidate them. Ronda says if they have a death wish so bad then they'll get their baptism by fire.
  
• Ricochet is shadow-boxing backstage when Bronson Reed approaches and calls him lucky for qualifying for Money in the Bank when he rag dolled him two weeks ago. Ricochet says it wasn't luck that he beat a former world champion and Bronson couldn't get the job done against Nakamura. Bronson says he was dominating Shinsuke until but is cut off by Nakamura saying until he beat him. Bronson walks off as Ricochet tells Nakamura he respects him but that won't change things tonight or at Money in the Bank.
  
• Backstage Chad Gable says Otis is the reason they came together with Maxine Dupree and Maxine says Otis is what made her realize their true potential but wants to know what that Viking troll. Chad tells her that he has a plan to train Otis to deal with the Viking Raiders and is having him read up on Viking literature but he is also going to teach her how to deal with Valhalla and tells her to get changed so they can train.
  
• It's time for Miz TV! Miz says he knew once he heard about the World Title match that tonight would be special so he had to secure a special guest and welcomes out Cody Rhodes. Cody comes to the ring and Miz says he looks dashing tonight before getting down to business. He says last week Cody listed all the cities he'll be in and challenged Brock Lesnar, the same man who broke his arm, to a fight? Isn't that kinda stupid. Cody says Mike is coming right out of the gate with it. Miz corrects him that in this ring he is The Miz thank you. Cody says he hadn't heard it been called stupid, he heard it called crazy, gutsy, and required balls which Miz knows a tiny bit about. Cody says since we all know Brock is on his yearly vacation so he has a feeling he won't be seeing Brock for a while but he will be waiting every week for him. Miz says he has a surprise for Cody, another multi-generational superstar who can know exactly what Cody goes through and introduces the one and only Dominik Mysterio who makes his way down with Rhea Ripley. Miz starts to talk but Rhea tells him to be quiet and Miz complies before she hands the mic to Dom. Dom attempts to speak but is booed out of it, Cody sarcastically asks for them not to boo Dom and Rhea demands that they show some respect. Dom powers through the boos to say that he listened to Cody talk last week like he was the big dog but compared to someone who did hard time he's just a birdie with a broken ring. Then he heard him list off all the crappy towns he'll be at and it made him realize that Cody is a bad father who'd rather be out waiting for Brock than at home with his daughter and says him a dead-beat just like Rey. Cody says he has a lot of empathy for the 15 minutes Dom spent in prison and calls that real hard time and says Dom ended up with a worse prison tattoo than he did. Then at Wrestlemania he didn't have a match at Rey, he had a public spanking. Cody admits that it is true that Rey made some terrible mistakes in his life, because he's looking right at one. Dom goes to leave but then smacks Cody as he's looking down and then hides behind Rhea as he taunts Cody and Ripley challenges him to take a shot. As Dom and Rhea retreat up the ramp Miz tries to hug Cody but instead Cody knocks him with a forearm from his titanium cast.
  
• Backstage Paul Heyman invites us to join him to join him this Friday when family drama will play out as Jey Uso makes his historic choice. As a wiseman he must at times deliver unpleasant news even if it is to Roman Reigns, and this is some unpleasant news. This will tear apart the Anoai family when Jey makes the right choice to stand by his brother...Solo. Heyman says you can share a womb with Jimmy but he will never be closer than with your Tribal Chief Roman Reigns, and says this Friday Jey will acknowledge that fact, or else.
  
• During the main event Finn attempts to blindside Seth on the outside but Rollins is able to super kick him off. Priest asks Finn why he's out there before re-focusing on the match. Following the end of the match Balor enters the ring to stare down with Seth.
  

SHAMELESS PLUGS

• Live Thread
  
• New to /SquaredCircle? Check out the Wiki!
  
• Check out our Squared Circle twitter account for all sorts of AMA announcements and interaction!
  
• Curious about how the /SquaredCircle Championship and Jobber Championship works? Check out the rules!
  
• Be sure to follow @WWE on Twitter and Like WWE on Facebook! You can download the official WWE App on iTunes so Michael Cole shuts up about it!
  
• Like other wrestling promotions? Perhaps you're looking for other subreddits related to wrestling? There's a sub for that! Check out /TheDirtsheets, /luchaunderground, /njpw /TNA, /ROH, /indiewrestling /wrestlewiththeplot (RIP), /wrestlewiththepackage (NSFW), /Wrasslin and more!
  

Family Matters to me…
Looking in the mirror and rubbing my face the stress has been taking a toll on my mental state. I've been deployed three times for a year each, and what makes it worse is that the Ironbloods are causing issues with the rest of Azur Lane. Last year I lost all contact with my half brother Ludwig and his mother Bismarck. My dad was called upon to resign from his position and did so willingly. They tried that on me, but my Mom Minneapolis shut that down quickly. The only other person I was I contact with is Edinburgh's son Duncan who I hate to admit, has grown on me since I taught him a lesson in manners. He's on base with his mother and baby sister, due to safety insurance for them.
Lifting my left arm and running my fingers from my right over a white ink tattoo that Ludwig wanted me to get to match his black ink one two years ago I felt anger and rage building inside me.
Bringing me from my thoughts, was my phone chiming with an unknown number on the screen. Picking it, I answered.
"Daniels speaking, who's this?"
The voice on the other end shook me to my core.
"I found you… I finally found you." The cold feminine voice crackled through my phone.
"I don't know what you want, or why you are calling me, but my calls are monitored closely…" I retorted as I was about to hang up. I heard another person. Laughing in the background, and then something about my sister.
"Sister? I don't have a sister. If this is a joke I swear-"
Just as I was about to scream the call ended and left me with high blood pressure. Then a heavy knock echoed through my quarters, which caused me to slip and fall out of the bathroom and into my living room.
"Bloody hell! Put on yer clothes Maria!" Duncan all but shouted with his eyes closed and a red blush across his pale face.
"My clothes? Wait, why are you in my dorm room?!" I shouted and grabbed a slipper and spiked it off of his forehead before he could react.
Covering myself, well covering my chest as I scurried around on the floor towards my tank top hitting Duncan across his shins and sending him toppling right down on top of me.
Slowly regaining myself Duncan's body weight wasn't on my torso. Raising my head, I realized where his weight was…
"D-Duncan… " I started shaking as Duncan had a blush across his face after lifting it from between my legs
Soon enough he shot up and began apologizing.
"I'm sorry! Please don't hit me!" Duncan pleaded.
Seeing him almost in tears over what just happened broke my heart. My fears of being sexually assaulted when I was in the academy needed to be put away. Reaching over to him, and grabbing his cheeks in my hands I pulled him in and held his head against my chest. Despite all the shaking I managed to steady my breathing.
"No… don't cry it's not your fault Duncan…" I softly spoke with my hands on his back.
"I didn't mean to plant my face there…" Duncan quietly whimpered as we sat there for a few hours.
"I'm glad my day was empty…" I groaned as I set a plate of sausage and gravy down in front of Duncan. "You got a good view of my body… what did you think?"
Duncan quietly tried to eat the food I just set down, but I pulled it away slowly. "Beautiful… extremely beautiful… I only cried because of where my face landed."
Sitting right beside him, I reached over and placed my fingers with his. "I owe you something for causing you to cry… so will you hear me out?"
He nodded and gently squeezed my hand.
Taking a deep breath I started.
XXXVVVVXXX
As I was about to get Duncan off my couch the entire base was drowned in the emergency alarms blaring and I quickly turned around and ran out of my quarters grabbing my plate carrier and sidearm.
"What the hell?!" I shouted as I watched three massive mechanical dragons rise out of the ocean and were coming right for us.
I covered my face with my arms as a giant metal claw came down right above my body.
"Halt! Do not harm her!" A deep, cold, yet soft voice ordered as the shadows from the claw moved away as I fell on my ass, holding my pistol out aiming at the muscle bound mountain of a figure in front of me.
When they moved from the shadows of the mechanical beast my eyes went wide.
"Ludy?" I forced my body to ask.
Ludwig pushed his hands against the beast and it gently moved over. His face was not how I remembered it. Mature and serious just like Bismarck…
"Where is your new Kommandant?" He asked, ignoring my calling of his name.
I tried to respond but it took too long for him, and within an instant he grabbed my plate carrier and lifted me off the ground.
"Where is the bastard that hurt Dad!? Where is he at!?" Ludwig shouted as he tossed me up to the jaws of his rigging, letting it clamp down on my arm.
Trying to get his rigging to release my arm was fruitless and wasn't going to help me, so I grabbed Ludwig's shoulder with my free hand while shaking from fear.
"L-ludy… you're hurting me…please tell it to let go. Commander Reyes isn't…isn't here. Don't destroy the base." The pain was becoming too much to handle as I had tears rolling down my face.
I watched as his face softened. Then suddenly my arm was free from his riggings mouth, and I was wrapped up in his arms.
"Es tut mir so leid, Maria... Ich wollte dich nicht verletzen." He said softly before checking my right arm for any injury besides the bruise.
I held my head and leaned on my brother. "Why would Commander Reyes hurt Dad? And when? I was visiting him on Monday…"
"Mother sent me to find Kommandant Reyes, and drag him to Berlin despite the conflict between the Eagle Union and Iron Blood…" Ludwig helped me stand up as Duncan landed on the concrete a few yard's behind us. His rigging pointed at Ludwig's.
"Ironblood…" Duncan groaned.
"Tea drinker…" Ludwig sneered.
"Duncan put your rigging away." I turned around and stood between the two. "Ludy… Call off your beast…"
I forced myself to raise my right arm and pulled out my phone. If Reyes is doing things behind the eyes of the board, and government officials, then I'm going to have to do something about it. As Ludwig and Duncan slowly lowered their rigging and stood down I started to dial my commander.
XXXVVVVXXX
Sitting in a lead back cushioned chair, was a girl with similar looks to Maria, yet a completely different demeanor than the militaristic young woman. Calm, stoic and yet she had a Chaotic aura surrounding her. Clearly busy doing something that required her to wear a headset over the top of her head. She was in control of something else.
"Why don't you remember me… Maria?" The young woman whispered to herself.
Blue lights slowly came to life illuminating the entire room she was in. Something, or someone was checking on her.
"Salem… Zero wishes to speak with you…" muttered the tall, dark and menacing figure that was slouched over by the all too small doorway.
"Yes Miss Strength." Salem set the headset aside and stood up from the lounge chair. "Let me wipe my eyes…"
Strength moved towards Salem. Her feet hit the metal floor with an obscene amount of weight, and knelt down to her level. "She will not know you, until she manifests her vessel… you have tried to push it, but it won't budge unless she wants to… Human emotions are not my high point. So I do not know the answers you seek, but Zero has decided to assist you in your wishes…"
Salem ran the sleeve of her Eagle Union branded coat across her face and gave the large Siren a hug, despite protests.
XXXVVVVXXX
A/N: Book 2 started! 3 years have passed! Will family betray each other for country or will a dark past bring them together even more! Find out more in chapter 2!

Hi all. I have done a couple of posts here about my estrangement from my father and the estrangement that just happened from my brother two weeks ago. I went no contact with my dad in August or September of last year. A couple of weeks ago, my brother decided he was going to then cut me out of his life when I finally confronted him after a lifetime of him pushing me around and being emotionally abusive.
As a child, he was physically abusive to me as well. I’ve tried to forgive and accept what happened when we were kids because we both grew up in an abusive household. Context: he separated from his wife last year, and finally had the divorce go through in March. His 20 year old daughter won’t talk to him as far back as October when we found out that she had created a pretty serious string of lies about things that she had told to him and the rest of our family. He confronted her and she pulled some manipulative crap with the help of her mother.
I’ve been very emotionally and financially supportive including loaning him $ to help him through this divorce. I also gave him a cash gift of $500. A couple of weeks ago, he was very stressed out about some thing regarding his house not being sold yet and I made a gentle suggestion about how he could handle it and he bit my head off. This is something he does regularly if he is not in a good mood. He’s just very moody and not stable. I have never confronted him about how he sometimes treats me. This time, I decided I was not going to let him get away with snapping at me and taking his stress out on me. I set a boundary with him the next day by telling him that the way he spoke to me, was unnecessary,it hurt my feelings and to please not communicate that way. He snapped at me so I continued and said he’s always been a bully and he should have already paid back the loan.
He’s taking a long time to repay it meanwhile he lives way beyond his means. I didn’t realize that when I gave him the loan. I didn’t realize he was going to get tattoos, and go to concerts and travel before he’d pay me back. He denied ever hurting me or touching me when we were kids and he didn’t say anything about the loan. He said he was cutting me out of his life and blocking me. I have no dad and right now, no brother.
I’m so angry that I was so supportive and he did this. I’m single and childfree. I barely have family and I have no partner. I just feel so fed up with this situation. I don’t deserve to be treated this way.

So I'm thinking of getting a tattoo for my favorite Disney movie, brother bear. The message of seeing life from perspectives different from your own has always stuck with me, and as someone with a brother, the movie always makes me pretty emotional lol I was kind of stuck between me and my brother getting a paw print tattoo of some kind, myself getting a tattoo of the bear of love totem, or myself getting a tattoo of the wall art from the cave in the movie, showing the human fighting the bear. The idea of the human fighting the bear is really cool I think, as I think it conveys the message of perspective really well, and I've never seen anyone else with a tattoo of that. Problem is I'm not sure where I'd put it. Any ideas?

Hey guys thats my first post and I'm new to that whole reddit thing, but I literally have to get something off my chest.
I'm F 19 and He is M 19. He is my second longterm relationship. His Family background is turkish (with conservative muslim Parents) but we live in a western country. He is taking religion not as serious as his Parents. Im not religious myself but I always respected his religion ( I even was interested myself bc I like to learn new things about different cultures).
So we met through Friends 1½ years ago. We went on some dates and we noticed we have very much in common. We share same issues withe ex relationships , same worldviews, same hobbies etc. It just clicked, after we met for a month we decided to be a couple. There started the Problems, he directly told me that we have to keep the relationship a secret from his family, because his mom doesn't want him to have a relationship (he is saying that is bc of the religion but I think its an excuse because the parents also life in many aspects very western). I think that the mom has some weird relationship to her son that she just doesn't want to have a girl in his life (I know she's a psycho).
Another aspect is that his parents are treating him like shit, they always force him to do chores and babysit his Brothers, also they are forcing him to study many hours a day. They are shouting at him if he is not behaving. He has also restrictions that he can only play videogames for 1 hour a day ( he is an adult keep that in mind ).
Half a year into the relationship we told them about us. They weren't very happy but accepted it with some restrictions. We couldn't have sleepovers, meet once a week and he just can stay for 3-6 hours when we meet. His parents also didn't really like me because I have an alternative style, tattoos and piercings. When I talked to her she was okay, but my bf told me that she was always talking bad behind my back.
Those things always bothered me bc I'll be 20, soon and I think things as Sleepovers should be normal and okay at this age. Anyways, so since then we were officially and keept going like that for the longest time. We argued a lot about these issues because we are the perfect match except for this point. Even in everyday life, the mother does everything for him. He really has no independence. We've talked a lot about it. His solution was that we let time pass until we finish school (this year) and then he just gradually becomes more independent over time.
We continued the relationship normally like that.
Then the issues started. Because I have mental problems myself and I would like more support (than once a week), we fought quite often about the mom thing.
There were a lot more things that happened because of the mother that increased my anger towards her. I was so mad at her because she manipulates him all the time, badmouths me and pressuring him into doing less with me and more with her.
Bc of the culture thing his family is his everything (what I don't understand bc they are very abusive) he also wasn't allowed to normally meet up with male friends.They controlled every thing he did in his life. He also hadn't a job thats why he was also financially dependent on his parents (even though I made him a lot presents).
He told me a lot of times that I am taking so much pain from him (bc he has a lot past trauma cuz his parents and exes and so on). We were emotionally on the same wavelength. We voiced every problem and communicated so much! We were the perfect power couple (Except of the family issue).
What also hurt me was that he always emphasized that he loves his mother more than me because it's his mother and she has done a lot (But doesn't make sense for me because she is forcing him, making him feel guilty for nothing and is abusive und toxic). I always told him that he should leave them and thats better to leave than living with toxic parents but they (and his 9 year old brother (who also loves me)) are too important for him.
But contrarily he is saying that he never got treated so good in a relationship. And that he never loved someone so much than me. We were soulmates.
We argued very much about the "I need a sleepover" topic. And generally about that it hurt me to see, that his parents destroyed him so much. Atp he got really depressed about the topic of standing between me and his parents because both partys want completely different things. But we handled every fight together and wanted to go though everything. He always was the "Lets fix it and fight for us" even if the hardest of times we had.
Lets talk about the current events:
After a lot of arguing about this topic he wanted to give me the sleepover I always wanted the whole 1½ years. We were so happy and hyped for it. Of course he had to lie to his parents and say that he is sleeping over at a friends house (what they weirdly allowed).
We were so incredibly happy and then the day happened and it was the best day we had in the whole relationship! We went for a walk, talked a lot with my mom, made a food in the middle of the night, watch movies, had very good sex.... Everything was just perfect and it was the first day where the relationship felt really complete. We also danced and had a deep talk that everything is going to get better and that we can fix everything together (very bad thing to say in retrospective).
The bad part about the story is, that he had to wake up early (7 a.m ) because his mom wanted to pick him up from his friends place ( so he had to drive with the train 20minutes to his friends place). I was awake when he got ready to leave and we talked, cuddled, said goodbye and then he left.
Because I slept very bad that night I fell immediately asleep after he left (until around 11 a.m.) . Then I woke up and looked at my phone and read just something like "I am so sorry I cant do this anymore, I am so sorry".
I opened the messeges and read a long text, how his mother found everything out got mad, and made him choose between me and his family. She said stuff like "Either you love your family and stay with us, or you have to leave her and can never meet her again"....
He apologized and said, that he can't do this anymore ( because its also draining for him what i can definitely understand) and that he is choosing his parents over me. I mean he always told me that, but that he would actually leave me because they hate me is so shoking for me. I was so numb and confusedy we chatted a bit, I thought he was joking. But then I realized that he really wants to break up. But he said he still loves me and he was thankful for my love and so on but that he can't hurt his parents like that....
We were literally soulmates and I really wanted to help him to get over his mommy issues but he dropped me for his toxic parents. I mean he loves me still and he really apologized for hurting me, but he fought with himself and also his parents. And sadly Im the one who lost that battle, and his parents won. His psyche must also suffer so much.
The day after we talked again and talked about our feelings. He told me that he loves me still, thinks every minute about me and misses me. And told him the same. But he still rejected me and still said that we can't be together anymore. I got so desperate ( because I have BPD and hardcore mental issues) and I begged him to come back and thing about it but he was stuck with his opinion, because he can't get kicked out.
But we always said during the relationship if we break up that we wanna be friends. So he asked me if we can be friends, but I told him that I need time. But I can't imagine being friends that shortly after the break up. We agreed that we would continue without contact and see if we could become friends again later.
We said out last goodbye texts and that we love eachother. Now he blocked me (I told him to bc I said its easier for me that I don't text him) & he also unfriended me in every videogame we played together (probably it hurts him too to see me online).
Yeah thats 3 days ago and I dont know what to feel and think. My relationship got fucked up in not even 24 hout by the stupid mother. It went from the best and most perfect day to horrible suffering. He always wanted to fight but he can't do this anymore and that makes me sad bc I gave him so much more than his shitty abusive parents.
I asked him if we could meet irl and talk about if face to face (everything that happened, happened through text messages). But he said, that he is really sick and cought a cold and is lying in his bed (maybe his karma?).
Anyways thats my current situation, I still love him so much and I'm so ambiguous about the situation bc on one hand we were the perfect match and laughed about other couple who "gave up so easily' bc we could never.
Im not sure if I have hope that he will come back or if its over for forever. We planned so much and we were unstoppable.
As I said he blocked me, but we are sending memes each other but I also try to be consequently with my no contact bc it hurts me so so much to talk with him without him being my boyfriend.
But I can't believe its over because of such a stupid thing...
I want to quit with having hope that he is coming back but I also can't realize that he is never coming back. Like what he always said and what he did in the end is so contrary. Its so weird to me. Because I think its sad, the parents must've destroyed him to let me go. He always told me that he is very scared of his parents and their force they have on him. It hurts me because it wasn't even himself who broke us up... It was his mother. He can't leave its like a toxic relationship. I really wanted to help him out of there.
Also a Friend of mine whos also a friend of him texted him about it. My friend asked him if his mother is happy with his decision now and he said to her: "My mom didn't see a future for me and her, my mom said Im gonna find something better someday and that my pain will go away".
It hurts me so much, I gave him the world and he still chose his mom over me.
Tbh I don't even know if anyone is going to read that or if its useless. I just needed to vent because I really don't know what to do and what to believe. If you have questions I surely will answer them. I'm so scared, sad and down. I'll visit a psychiatry in summer because of my health issues, I hope my life will be better.
My plan is, that Im trying to get over him. If he decides to come back I will take him (If he's leaving this household). But if he's not going to do it, its over!
As a conclusion: I fell in love with a mommas boy, I wouldn't recommend it except you want to suffer
Take care if yourself and please don't let you MIL ruin your relationship!!

Harbinger:

Genres: thriller, scifi, fantasy, war, mythology, space
​
What is Harbinger really about and who is the messenger of doom? Chapter One Starts with the origins of the Fenshian and the Dochani, it tells of them being of one race. It is an excerpt of a text book written by the main character's ancestors. Dochani Beta refers to the planet that the Dochani came to colonize after several wars fought on other planets, their home world is not known. The Vortex and The Map of the Universe is mentioned so soon in the story, like it is and is not the premise of the book. It mentions the civil war between Dochani on Dochani Beta. War preparations are listed, which includes laying eggs on several million planets. It continues to refer to the Dochani Archives, which are pretty much scattered across the universe. After the civil war, the Dochani are found by the Fenshian and a massacre occurs. Chapter Two starts with hiding in the ocean. The Dochani school system is explained, the Dochani under school is explained, and the Dochani colonies are discussed. Dochani Zeta the planet is introduced at this point in the story. The planet Sevle that the mother of Alexandra, Kenjin, is introduced with the prophesy of destruction for the planet Sevle. With regards to the prophesy, the planet Primus Mortus is mentioned. Kenjin's home planet is mentioned. The Kingdom of Shinra is introduced in the story. Dochani are egg laying beings and as such, this is where Kenjin's Egg is mentioned. The last egg of a Dochani mother, last before her death, gains the previous powers of all of the mothers that had passed, not all Dochani have a last egg before death.
​
Their death is usually after they lay the egg, not dying of old age and the last birth or laying is not the last before death if they did not die in the laying of the egg. Alexandra is the last egg, or comes from the last egg rather. The hatching may not happen for 2,000 years as this is what happens with Alexandra. Alexandra, after her hatching, spends over 300 years in the town of Bannian on the planet, Sevle. When it is time to leave the town, it is on a ship named Sea Serpent. Chapter Three begins with the storm on the sea. Alexandra is lost and Kalima and her mother and father carry out their things in the kingdom of Shinra. For Sevlin time passes quickly as they do not normally live very long, they die sooner than later. Fast track to Kevlin being a lot older as Kalima tells of her life. Soon we learn of Kevlin's folly and all of his desires to find Alexandra. The mistakes he makes in front of the wrong people. Chapter four begins Kalima's dilemma. She finds her dad dead in his bed, and begins the process of becoming immortal. Then her father's funeral takes place and she is different, and her family is annoyed with Kalima. She is betrayed by her brothers. Kalima has to survive, no matter what. She is thrown into the ocean and finds herself facing things that she never thought that she would. But she still had to find the truth about what happened with her father and his strange death.
​
Chapter five is all about that ocean view and the shaman that betrays her. Kalima becomes the sentient creature of the sea and then becomes a woman of power with a book that should not exist. There is a major magical accident that sends her to be born from another, on an Earth. She is in an egg of her mother and her mother is born. Chapter six she is born from that mother. Mad science is done on her as she is eventually known as Tika Roma. There is higher tech on this world, like it was at 2500+ AD. Chapter seven she begins to get more powerful. Chapter eight she makes terms with her captors. Later that Earth explodes and she is sent somewhere else. Chapter nine we are back to Alexandra when she went overboard from the ship, Sea Serpent on the planet Sevle. She meets the L'art'o tribe that takes her in, but does not take her in. They are cannibals so they think a little differently. Alexandra learns their customs while a captive. Chapter ten she is tattooed with dots and branded. She is a slave. Chapter eleven she is taught how she is to serve the L'art'o tribes people. At the end of the initiation of being a servant, there is the smoking of the pipe. It brings out the beast within her. After she finds herself on Sortenla, another planet where she eats lily pads. Chapter twelve begins with her back in the L'arto'o tribe, but after being away for fifteen years and many of the tribes people were eaten by wolves or a wolf.
​
An acolyte, Jentus, takes her in to get supplies for being trained as a hunter. Chapter thirteen begins her hunter training. Basic training is fighting and exercises, an enchanted forest is used to get more out of training in a shorter time frame. It feels longer than it actually is in the real world. The Dochani are explained in the words of her captor, Jentus. Blocks, punches and kicks are explained and worked on. Chapter fourteen begins with the practice sword, a short sword. After some time she is sent into the Enchanted Forest again where she has to survive on grubs and foraging. Shortly after passing through the veil between the real world and unknown world she ends up on another world, a Dochani world. Chapter fifteen she begins mage training with her father, Genshen. Karma is the essence of Dochani magic. There is a training accident and because of stress she finds herself in the in-between assassin world of the wolf. A six hundred thousand year old wolf that no longer exists outside of the realm of the wolf, trains her how to be an assassin. Back in the L'art'o tribe none of them is left and the devourer of worlds that was prophesied to come on Sevle, comes. Fenshian means devourer. Chapter sixteen she is back on Sortenla, the planet. The army structure of the Grand Reach is explained by SilverFox. SilverFox makes his escape from a forward camp with important papers, while the rest of the army fights the enemy. Chapter seventeen is the logistics of various members of the group that peeled off and the defenders that were left behind. The defenders at the forward camp are overrun and only one sergeant survives the attack, as the sergeants were left in charge of fighting the enemy while ciphers are being taken to the king or high ruler.
​
Tree the scout is caught and the shapeshifter elf is found out as he was one of the sergeants. In the desperate fight or flight run SilverFox tumbles down a hill and runs into Alexandra, or this is the other side of her story being revealed. Tree is caught by the necromancer, the nemesis or one of the nemisises of the story. Chapter eighteen introduces the Magi. Ghast Ogres are the Magi. Alexandra cannot find a source to fuel her magic on Sortenla so she uses blood magic to heal her and SilverFox, binding them together. Her father warned her that this magic can corrupt your karma. It is reported to the king that his son and the ciphers he was carrying, were captured. SilverFox is the son of the king. The Ghast Ogre is rescued by two female elves, the Ghast Orge's soon to be wives, and the shapeshifter elf is found to be the uncle of one or both of the elves that rescue the Ghast Ogre. The necromancer is in a bath house in the city of bone. Scouts report to the king of where SilverFox and the girl is, as the king does not know who she is at this point. Chapter nineteen we are introduced to the city of bone and what takes place there. Betrayed by the only scouts to give the king the message of where SilverFox is, those that were with SilverFox before wait in cells. SilverFox and Alexandra are in a stone room. Within the Gunga Jungle, the Ghast Ogre kingdom, the two elves marry the Ghast Ogre in the Ghast custom. Part of the process is Magi Tattoos. Chapter twenty brings in the necromancer's undead armies. War between the allies and the emperor begin. SilverFox, Alexandra and the others are tortured in the city of bone, while the war is fought on more than a few fronts.
​
Things get so bad that Alexandra turns into the wolf and kills several of the captors and torturers. Chapter twenty one begins the tea party with two elf lady's after they come to save Alexandra and the rest of those being tortured that were not already dead. After a long talk, training is offered as well as ancient armour said to bond with those that wear it, or kill them if they are not Dochani. Armour that can be summoned in layers, weapons as well made from the same materials. Chapter twenty two begins bow training. Go'gen style of martial arts, the style used by the elves and the Ghast Ogres, is taught to her. Real weapons are used in sparring. Alexandra, SilverFox and their family receive 150 Magi tattooes and are part of the Magi. When Alexandra is 1590 years old, the Fenshian come to Sortenla. Chapter twenty three begins Alexandra's long 20,000+ years of metamorphosis. Afterwards Alexandra is feline with wings and claws and her family is missing. She is still on Sortenla. Hunters are hunting for a feast, the Boggarin is one of the delicacies of trolls. A tiger is hunted, then an Egorack, and of course the Rhagarian Hog. At this time there is not much of the big empires of the past just tribal villages, good trolls, and of course bad trolls. A long table is where they will eat this food after the cooks prepare it. Chapter twenty four finally declares Alexandra as champion, even though she was away for like 25,000 years and so much changed while she was changing. Chapter twenty five begins with the betrothal as all alliances are weddings or marriages.
​
In this time, the marriage gauntlet is a thing and you run through it when you get married. If you don't make it, you don't get married. Once through it, the marriage alliance happens with the marriage of two tribes becoming one. Chapter twenty six begins the mind trap, a Fenshian trick. Michael Cronin, the necromancer, is still alive after 25,000 years or not as he is just a Lich. The creature that is Michael Cronin is sent into another existence when Alexandra crushes his heart. The war goes on and the Fenshian are destroyed, but in the end Alexandra is hit with a strange black dart and disappears. Chapter twenty seven begins with Nobeard leaving a note for the one to come, which is several thousand years after the disappearance of Alexandra. A small group of bandits with iron gauntlets on their armour and bad trolls are in this time, left over of the enemies before. Tribes and a troll / tribe hybrid from an old alliance exist in this time. They are all descendants of those that fought the Fenshian and the undead so long ago. The Iron Fist are descendants of the emperor's men. Chapter twenty eight is the meeting after the Iron Fist men attacked the village. Allies will be gathered just like what happened more than seven thousand years ago. This is still the planet Sortenla. Dractopus are explained here and Dragon Rats. Of course.
​
After rest, all go to different areas to gather and form a new city. Chapter twenty nine troll history is explained and the other races on Sortenla as many left for somewhere else. In chapter thirty the great hunt begins like it did more than seven thousand years ago, chapter thirty one is the feast and marriage proposals, chapter thirty two is the journey to the new city. Chapter thirty three is where everyone agreed to meet. As they all travel towards the agreed upon place, Kalima comes down in a great ball of fire. Chapter thirty four they see a black castle in the distance and head towards it. 50,000 plus allies entered the castle and were just gone. On the planet Earth 2150 a Jacob Mathews is tossed a black sphere and disappears from that planet. Jacob ends up on another planet changed from what he was. Chapter thirty five Jacob get's married to the daughter of the Icorn people. The Icorn people begin to get wings again and the Icorn Fortress is moved into. Aqua goblins have to be fought that burn in the daylight. Chapter thirty six starts on the planet Primodia where Delaigda resides. She rides on a black horse through a wall of black and disappears from her world. The'd'r resides on the planet Geh where everyone that touches a black object goes. He is in search of the one.
​
Delaigda becomes a gladiator of sorts on the planet Geh. Chapter thirty seven brings a few heroes together. The heroes are pursued. The underground and the syndicate are opposing factions. Chapter thirty eight the heroes think of the past. The syndicate is explained. The underground is explained. Chapter thirty nine is the vortex and what it means with regards to Alexandra. Thorinjian, on the planet Khangle, encounters a black sphere and it sends him to the planet Geh. He ends up saving the boss of the underground and makes a deal with her. Orc Carcass Tavern makes its first appearance as Thorinjian has visions induced by the singer. Alexandra awakes in a Lagoon not knowing who she is. Chapter forty we learn of the keeper of the Lagoon. Alexandra undergoes training, and also training within dreams. She get's sick from not knowing herself and ends up at the Ork Carcass Tavern. Chapter forty one the doctor arrives to treat Alexandra.
Book can be found here Harbinger

I'm talking about cameos of characters from different fandoms. Nothing that really effects the story and definitely not enough of an appearance to warrant tagging the cameo character or it's fandom, but just a little pop in here, blink and you miss it appearance. Essentially, if you don't know who the character from the cameo is, it won't really effect your experience with the story. Maybe Spiderman happens to meet two brothers driving an Impala from '67 and he thinks it's kinda funny that their last name is a type of rifle. Or maybe Phineas and Ferb happen to create a portal that leads to another universe and they meet a weird vegetarian kid with a blue arrow tattooed on his forehead who flies super high in the air when he sneezes. Something along those lines.
So, what are your thoughts on this? Do you find it pulls you out of the story? Is it too self indulgent on the part of the author? Or is it a fun and funny little way for an author to share their interests with the readers?

I was raised in the “Truth”, force fed it really. My mother and her whole side are all witnesses. At the congregation I attended there was ones who were on a higher rung of the socioeconomic ladder than myself and my mother and sister. I remember getting sideways looks when we’d come in and I’d be in my hand me down sports jacket and non matching slacks. I remember hating that fuckin place every single time I saw it. The elders were condescending, the fuckin ppl were a joke. And then I turned 18 and married a “worldly” girl bc I had gotten her preggo.. and fell away from meetings and such. Fast forward to the age of 24 and I had just robbed a bank and was going away for 85% of 125 months. So while I was in there I guess I was just looking for something to grab onto. Something familiar you might say. I made the mistake of mentioning one day to a couple guys who went to meetings inside the prison with some volunteers that came in, that I grew up going to the Kingdom Hall, and the next thing ya know they was at my cell door every day trying to get me to do a Bible study or come to the meeting or this or that. I didn’t give in for a month or two then I relented. Once I went, it wasn’t as if I believed anything any more that I had when I was young. I guess studying the Bible just gave me something to occupy my time. Anyways, In 2015, 5 years after I was sent to prison I was dunked in the baptism tank in prison and the elder volunteers said “when you get out come down to our congregation and meet everybody”. So I get out and go down there and I guess they wasn’t expecting me to actually show up bc they acted like I was just trash. Barely even acted like they knew me. I guess it’s cause I have sleeve tattoos and a neck tat. Anyways, I went up there to question them about the two witness rule bc I couldn’t cause a stir in prison bc they wouldn’t let me go back to the meetings and in there you will do anything to break the tedium. Lol. Anyhow when I asked them about the two witness rule they just looked at each other, sighed, and said “the two witness rule is there to protect good standing brothers and sisters from false allegations”. I just shook my head and walked out. Fuckin pathetic